We came to the states when I was 8, right in that second plane of development. My parents were working around the clock, we didn't have much, but some of my strongest and most precious memories are from that time period. We would get cookbooks it the library, translate the recipes, and make something new together. Or build giant puzzles that still hang in their home to this day. We played SO many board games, which are now waiting to be used by our daughter 😭 they were simple moments of togetherness but they were abundant and that's what made them memorable 🙌
With the hobbies, we also see them develop strong interests about specific topics like cars, animals, planes....the Titanic 😅 That 6-12 age is when my brother found every piece of information available in his Montessori class and our library about the Titanic, and then we went to the museum to see an exhibit about it. He's 17 now and he still talks about it-that information stuck 😅 But I totally agree-at that age it's not thw trays and baskets on the shelves-it's about supporting these interests, their independence, and relationships! (Also don't be surprised if you find that later in the plane you DO see your girls fully capable of making dinner on their own! I distinctly remember making some of our dinners and insisting I do it all myself right at the tail end of that stage!)
Don’t forget Montessori isn’t only about wooden toys and arts and crafts either. Natural materials are great and better for the planet indeed but Montessori is also about including day to day items in your child’s play. My son’s former Montessori nursery had real old phones and cell phones lying around for their toddlers to explore and play with. An older child 6-12 may love to play with an old camera, radio or recorder you may have lying around or in storage somewhere…
I got interested in Montessori and responsive parenting as a teen myself and how I am 24 and raising my own little one. It’s so much easier to start thinking about things when you’re young so you have less to “unlearn” when you get older.
Very exited to watch this new upload! I can’t believe Kylie is going to be 6 this year. It feels like just yesterday she was a small toddler approaching her 2nd birthday 😮
This is extremely helpful! So many helpful ideas condensed in this video. I have a 7-year old and I've been looking for books, resources that deal with the topic of raising children aged beyond 6 the Montessori way. I have not been able to find many, or probably do not know where to look. This video gives me solid, actionable advice to try out. Ashley, your videos never disappoint. Thank you!
Ashley, I know of a great program around here and I thought maybe I would throw this out there as a volunteering opportunity that will double as a responsibility experience as well... fostering for an animal shelter. We do "kitten season" every spring. And it has been a positive experience for my girls to learn how to care for them, and also to learn to let go and say goodbye when the time comes. There is such a need for kittens to be handled and played with outside of a cage, and shelters get filled so quickly. I hope that you and your viewers may consider this opportunity for your family to help an animal in need wherever you live.
Thank you for this video! My daughter is 6 so this is extremely helpful. I followed so many of your ideas with my kids when they were younger. Can’t wait to incorporate these ideas!
Yay! I've been asking about this for a while. So happy to finally have an answer. I've noticed so many changes with my daughter during the late 4-5 stage. It was insane. It really does feel like a whole new game once they enter the next phase.
Super interesting and can totally relate as my eldest turns 6 in Jan and I can see a lot of changes in him (esp the loss of order 🤪). Comforting to hear how the shelf is not the focus anymore in this phase. At the same time, i find that my youngest (2.5yo) “misses out” on “shelf playtime” bc the eldest is not modeling that anymore and he just wants to play like his older brother. Do u have a similar experience? Would love to hear ur thoughts/feelings on that :)
Such a helpful video. Would love to see some updated content on an older child's bedroom. My daughter turns 6 soon and we need to reconfigure the house for a new baby. I'm mostly unsure what wardrobe to get her that will see her through the next few years as she grows. Thanks 😊
I was so excited to see this video. I started following when my son was 4 or so. Now he’s 6.5 and entering the second plane which is like having a whole new kid 😂. Love this new content.
I would LOVE more information and resources on older children and teens. I love researching parenting techniques and I love the Montessori and "gentle parenting" methods, I prefer things backed by science and these methods are great! Unfortunately finding resources for educating myself gets harder and harder as the age of the, in my case imaginary, child increases. A lot of the resources on teens especially are full of what I consider to actually be pretty bad authoritarian advice. I don't see the same amount of time being dedicated to how to parent older children as I do the little ones, there's less variety of opinion. I'm so interested in childhood development and good parenting because I didn't have a good upbringing, and before I'd be willing to bring children into the world, I need to see and understand what a healthy upbringing looks like. So far, I'd say I could be a decent mother employing what I've learned... Until they turn 9 or so and then I would only have to guess at what a child that age needs from me. I'm worried I won't be able to let go and give them the freedom they need because I have absolutely no idea what is appropriate developmentally and as an anxious person in general, without a guide I know I'd end up on the side of too little freedom. All this to say, I love your videos, I know your children are still pretty young but I would just adore more videos about older children, or your thoughts on where to get good resources to learn more. ❤️
Just loved this video! Have been following you for years and my daughter is a new developmental fase right now and was worried that I wouldn’t be able to find information on Montessori for this new fase. Really happy that you are also focusing on the 9-12 age group. 🙏🏻🙏🏻
In an earlier video, you mentioned your kids have 1 hour of screentime, how will that develop in this age range? This age range also involves the time when most kids get their own phones, and unless your kid is homeschooled or in a private school where nobody is allowed to have phones, there will be schoolmates who have unlimited access to their phones and any apps they wish to install, leading to your own child wanting to join in on the fun, kids can even be bullied if they can't access the same social media and games as the friends group. Any ideas on this?
Can you give an example of a healthy response to the why can't we buy this at the store question? I realize the answer a kid gets to that question can influence their self-image, how they understand their own family vs other families as they start making connections about society.
I am soooooo not an expert on this - just passing on the response of wiser parents that resonates with me. Something along the lines of, ‘we have other things that we are saving (reserving /earmarking / planning) our money for.’ Sounds so nonjudgmental and matter-of-fact! Sounds like you totally have your finances in order. One money-adjacent issue that my 3 year old has raised many times and seems to have heard from somewhere else is that we have a small car. She doesn’t understand that small cars are typically cheaper than big cars but she knows that she sees a difference. Each time we go through all the legitimate reasons why a person might have a big car: lots of children; is a professional who has to carry lots of equipment; tall person who physically needs the leg room. I avoid saying anything about money or (perceived) status of the size or make of car. We have a small car because it is just the 2 of us and we don’t need to drive much. All about utility and logic. We play this ‘projection’ game at a level she can participate in when we’re out and about and she asks, ‘Why is that child crying?’ I might start off with, ‘Maybe she bumped her knee.’ and then ask her what would make her cry? Then we dream up all kinds of scenarios. When she was 2 she was very troubled that a set of twins hadn’t come the first day back from the weekend. We dreamed up scenarios where they went away for a vacation or there was a family event. Those really helped counter her concerns that they were sick. And it’s sooo nice to ask them Why questions. :-) Hope something here helped or gave you food for thought.
I’m hoping the Hapa Family community who have *former* toddlers 😂 could chime in, so I’m posting my question under this video. When is a good time (age, behavioral milestones, etc.) to let a toddler control the light in their room? Our 21 m/o has always liked turning on and off lights. I want to make it possible for him to play in his room when he rises in the morning. The room has very dark shades, so a light would be necessary for him in the morning. But my husband is worried he would turn on the light at night and play past his bedtime. A bigger question may be, how did you know you could trust that your toddler would not abuse the freedom they’re given while encouraging them to be independent?
I bought my little one a battery operated orb ‘moon’ light that can be turned on and off by touch. It’s the about the strength of very soft reading light. She can control the light and it is on the bookshelf at the foot of her bed, within easy reach. Helpful if they wake up in the night as well. Luckily, we don’t really need the light. She sleeps beautifully and I’m already awake and dressed when (because) it is time for her to wake up. She loved turning it on and off but seemed to get it out of her system and didn’t notice when the batteries needed to be recharged. There are outlet timers that you can add to a lamp. My question would be what is the real, underlying need: exploring light or having enough light at a certain time for other activities?
My 2yo LOVES to put the soap in the dishwasher, close the door, and push start. Because she can do it all by herself. She's not a fan of tasks that she needs help with, she'd rather just have me do it
What would Montessori look like from 12-18 years of age, this might be an obvious question but I'd love your insight on how to tackle ten years as a Montessori parent. TIA!
This video is so helpful. My child is within this age group and so many questions answered! I do have one additional question though: as the child grows older, how would you introduce small additional responsibilities as they get older and are capable to do more. Thank you in advance!
Thank you for this video, very helpful. I love the part you included about taking care of the environment, because it's so so important, thank you for that. Also I wanted to know are you homeschooling or is Kylie going to a Montessori school? The Montessori school I tried in my area are not completely aware of gentle and conscious discipline and I am currently homeschooling until I find an option that I love and feel comfortable with. It has been a challenge because I don't want her to miss out on the community aspect of school so any tips you have are welcomed. Lots of love to all of your family.
Do you have a new art cart set up or is it the same 1 you did years ago? I would love to see this because my oldest is 6 and I want to set up a thing for her but I just don't want it all over the house.
Hey Ashley since your girls birthdays are approaching and Kylie is entering this new age group, are you still doing their birthdays at home where they're walking around the sun, the way montessori does it? Or is it kind of something you do for 1-5?
I’m actually not doing it at home anymore because they both do it at school in their classrooms. :) So I really wanted to keep it a special thing for school.
@@HapaFamily do you know if their school or future school continues the walk around the sun in the second plane? also now that your not doing the walk around the sun in your home do you have any specific ways or traditions that you feel reflect Montessori?
hello what do you suggest to say when i ask my child to help with one of the things you mentioned and they ask "why" not in a rude way just honestly the child being curious.
Hi Ashley, I have a 12 month old boy and am looking for a resource that has a large amount of ideas /Montessori activities for each stage. one that says, ok, as your child gets closer to x age, begin to introduce this this and this. Do you have anything like this or is there a material that has this laid out for moms without a Montessori training?
You don’t, in my opinion. Let them be little kids and quit burdening them with stuff they don’t have the capacity to understand. Wait until they are a little older.
We came to the states when I was 8, right in that second plane of development. My parents were working around the clock, we didn't have much, but some of my strongest and most precious memories are from that time period. We would get cookbooks it the library, translate the recipes, and make something new together. Or build giant puzzles that still hang in their home to this day. We played SO many board games, which are now waiting to be used by our daughter 😭 they were simple moments of togetherness but they were abundant and that's what made them memorable 🙌
With the hobbies, we also see them develop strong interests about specific topics like cars, animals, planes....the Titanic 😅 That 6-12 age is when my brother found every piece of information available in his Montessori class and our library about the Titanic, and then we went to the museum to see an exhibit about it. He's 17 now and he still talks about it-that information stuck 😅 But I totally agree-at that age it's not thw trays and baskets on the shelves-it's about supporting these interests, their independence, and relationships! (Also don't be surprised if you find that later in the plane you DO see your girls fully capable of making dinner on their own! I distinctly remember making some of our dinners and insisting I do it all myself right at the tail end of that stage!)
i miss seeing Kylie and Mia so much❤ hapafamily vlogs are in my heart
Don’t forget Montessori isn’t only about wooden toys and arts and crafts either. Natural materials are great and better for the planet indeed but Montessori is also about including day to day items in your child’s play. My son’s former Montessori nursery had real old phones and cell phones lying around for their toddlers to explore and play with. An older child 6-12 may love to play with an old camera, radio or recorder you may have lying around or in storage somewhere…
Yes, definitely a busy parent, not a 16 year old who is inexplicably obsessed with Montessori and Parenting 😅
Future Montessori educator? Go Mimmy!
Lol I am 28 and don't have kids yet. But I hope to have my first in the next two years
Same here 😅😅 I’m 15 and super obsessed w kids!! And montessori seems like such a great and healthy approach
i’m 18 and have been fixated on montessori for months. it’s so interesting
I got interested in Montessori and responsive parenting as a teen myself and how I am 24 and raising my own little one. It’s so much easier to start thinking about things when you’re young so you have less to “unlearn” when you get older.
Very exited to watch this new upload! I can’t believe Kylie is going to be 6 this year. It feels like just yesterday she was a small toddler approaching her 2nd birthday 😮
This is extremely helpful! So many helpful ideas condensed in this video. I have a 7-year old and I've been looking for books, resources that deal with the topic of raising children aged beyond 6 the Montessori way. I have not been able to find many, or probably do not know where to look. This video gives me solid, actionable advice to try out. Ashley, your videos never disappoint. Thank you!
So glad you found this video valuable! 🥰 Happy New Year!
Ashley, I know of a great program around here and I thought maybe I would throw this out there as a volunteering opportunity that will double as a responsibility experience as well... fostering for an animal shelter. We do "kitten season" every spring. And it has been a positive experience for my girls to learn how to care for them, and also to learn to let go and say goodbye when the time comes. There is such a need for kittens to be handled and played with outside of a cage, and shelters get filled so quickly. I hope that you and your viewers may consider this opportunity for your family to help an animal in need wherever you live.
Excellent idea and what wonder values to instill in your daughters!
Thank you for this video! My daughter is 6 so this is extremely helpful. I followed so many of your ideas with my kids when they were younger. Can’t wait to incorporate these ideas!
Hey! I remember you mentioning introducing second language to your kids. Can you share more details about how you went about it?
Yay! I've been asking about this for a while. So happy to finally have an answer. I've noticed so many changes with my daughter during the late 4-5 stage. It was insane. It really does feel like a whole new game once they enter the next phase.
Just whishing you all lots of love and offering a boost for your engagement metrics. Cant believe Kylie will be 6 in march. Cheers from Brasil. :)
Thank you!! 🥰
makes me Sad that so many parents are forced to spend so much time away from their children. a lot of us cant afford to be at home more.
Super interesting and can totally relate as my eldest turns 6 in Jan and I can see a lot of changes in him (esp the loss of order 🤪). Comforting to hear how the shelf is not the focus anymore in this phase. At the same time, i find that my youngest (2.5yo) “misses out” on “shelf playtime” bc the eldest is not modeling that anymore and he just wants to play like his older brother. Do u have a similar experience? Would love to hear ur thoughts/feelings on that :)
Such a helpful video. Would love to see some updated content on an older child's bedroom. My daughter turns 6 soon and we need to reconfigure the house for a new baby. I'm mostly unsure what wardrobe to get her that will see her through the next few years as she grows. Thanks 😊
I was so excited to see this video. I started following when my son was 4 or so. Now he’s 6.5 and entering the second plane which is like having a whole new kid 😂. Love this new content.
I would LOVE more information and resources on older children and teens.
I love researching parenting techniques and I love the Montessori and "gentle parenting" methods, I prefer things backed by science and these methods are great!
Unfortunately finding resources for educating myself gets harder and harder as the age of the, in my case imaginary, child increases. A lot of the resources on teens especially are full of what I consider to actually be pretty bad authoritarian advice.
I don't see the same amount of time being dedicated to how to parent older children as I do the little ones, there's less variety of opinion.
I'm so interested in childhood development and good parenting because I didn't have a good upbringing, and before I'd be willing to bring children into the world, I need to see and understand what a healthy upbringing looks like. So far, I'd say I could be a decent mother employing what I've learned... Until they turn 9 or so and then I would only have to guess at what a child that age needs from me. I'm worried I won't be able to let go and give them the freedom they need because I have absolutely no idea what is appropriate developmentally and as an anxious person in general, without a guide I know I'd end up on the side of too little freedom.
All this to say, I love your videos, I know your children are still pretty young but I would just adore more videos about older children, or your thoughts on where to get good resources to learn more. ❤️
Agree! Would be very helpful to know more about parenting teens ! Commenting so I’ll be notified if anyone finds anything good 👍
Just loved this video! Have been following you for years and my daughter is a new developmental fase right now and was worried that I wouldn’t be able to find information on Montessori for this new fase. Really happy that you are also focusing on the 9-12 age group. 🙏🏻🙏🏻
A lot of these chores does my 3 old. Groceries, dishwasher, snacks, pets and more. We have more chores for the older.
In an earlier video, you mentioned your kids have 1 hour of screentime, how will that develop in this age range? This age range also involves the time when most kids get their own phones, and unless your kid is homeschooled or in a private school where nobody is allowed to have phones, there will be schoolmates who have unlimited access to their phones and any apps they wish to install, leading to your own child wanting to join in on the fun, kids can even be bullied if they can't access the same social media and games as the friends group. Any ideas on this?
Missing your videos! I regularly come back to refer to older ones though. Love from Almaty
Can you give an example of a healthy response to the why can't we buy this at the store question? I realize the answer a kid gets to that question can influence their self-image, how they understand their own family vs other families as they start making connections about society.
I am soooooo not an expert on this - just passing on the response of wiser parents that resonates with me. Something along the lines of, ‘we have other things that we are saving (reserving /earmarking / planning) our money for.’ Sounds so nonjudgmental and matter-of-fact! Sounds like you totally have your finances in order. One money-adjacent issue that my 3 year old has raised many times and seems to have heard from somewhere else is that we have a small car. She doesn’t understand that small cars are typically cheaper than big cars but she knows that she sees a difference. Each time we go through all the legitimate reasons why a person might have a big car: lots of children; is a professional who has to carry lots of equipment; tall person who physically needs the leg room. I avoid saying anything about money or (perceived) status of the size or make of car. We have a small car because it is just the 2 of us and we don’t need to drive much. All about utility and logic. We play this ‘projection’ game at a level she can participate in when we’re out and about and she asks, ‘Why is that child crying?’ I might start off with, ‘Maybe she bumped her knee.’ and then ask her what would make her cry? Then we dream up all kinds of scenarios. When she was 2 she was very troubled that a set of twins hadn’t come the first day back from the weekend. We dreamed up scenarios where they went away for a vacation or there was a family event. Those really helped counter her concerns that they were sick. And it’s sooo nice to ask them Why questions. :-) Hope something here helped or gave you food for thought.
We say that it isn't in the budget this time.
Thanks for this. Do you have actual montessori materials for older kids?
I’m hoping the Hapa Family community who have *former* toddlers 😂 could chime in, so I’m posting my question under this video.
When is a good time (age, behavioral milestones, etc.) to let a toddler control the light in their room? Our 21 m/o has always liked turning on and off lights. I want to make it possible for him to play in his room when he rises in the morning. The room has very dark shades, so a light would be necessary for him in the morning. But my husband is worried he would turn on the light at night and play past his bedtime.
A bigger question may be, how did you know you could trust that your toddler would not abuse the freedom they’re given while encouraging them to be independent?
I bought my little one a battery operated orb ‘moon’ light that can be turned on and off by touch. It’s the about the strength of very soft reading light. She can control the light and it is on the bookshelf at the foot of her bed, within easy reach. Helpful if they wake up in the night as well. Luckily, we don’t really need the light. She sleeps beautifully and I’m already awake and dressed when (because) it is time for her to wake up. She loved turning it on and off but seemed to get it out of her system and didn’t notice when the batteries needed to be recharged. There are outlet timers that you can add to a lamp. My question would be what is the real, underlying need: exploring light or having enough light at a certain time for other activities?
My 2yo LOVES to put the soap in the dishwasher, close the door, and push start. Because she can do it all by herself. She's not a fan of tasks that she needs help with, she'd rather just have me do it
I've been wanting a video about this for a long time! Thank you!! It's really useful knowing what to expect in the near future!
What would Montessori look like from 12-18 years of age, this might be an obvious question but I'd love your insight on how to tackle ten years as a Montessori parent. TIA!
Thank you Ashley!!
Love your videos, Ashley! all very helpful 😊
This video is so helpful. My child is within this age group and so many questions answered! I do have one additional question though: as the child grows older, how would you introduce small additional responsibilities as they get older and are capable to do more. Thank you in advance!
Thank you for this video, very helpful. I love the part you included about taking care of the environment, because it's so so important, thank you for that. Also I wanted to know are you homeschooling or is Kylie going to a Montessori school? The Montessori school I tried in my area are not completely aware of gentle and conscious discipline and I am currently homeschooling until I find an option that I love and feel comfortable with. It has been a challenge because I don't want her to miss out on the community aspect of school so any tips you have are welcomed. Lots of love to all of your family.
oo this was very interesting! really wanted to know this!
This is my burning question
Do you have a new art cart set up or is it the same 1 you did years ago? I would love to see this because my oldest is 6 and I want to set up a thing for her but I just don't want it all over the house.
Happy new year! And I love this video as usual~^^
Thank you for sharing! Very interesting and informative 👍
Thanks for taking the time for it!
Love from Johanne, Norway 🇳🇴
Realy interesting!
Hey Ashley since your girls birthdays are approaching and Kylie is entering this new age group, are you still doing their birthdays at home where they're walking around the sun, the way montessori does it? Or is it kind of something you do for 1-5?
I’m actually not doing it at home anymore because they both do it at school in their classrooms. :) So I really wanted to keep it a special thing for school.
@@HapaFamily do you know if their school or future school continues the walk around the sun in the second plane? also now that your not doing the walk around the sun in your home do you have any specific ways or traditions that you feel reflect Montessori?
hello what do you suggest to say when i ask my child to help with one of the things you mentioned and they ask "why" not in a rude way just honestly the child being curious.
I'm 12 min in and I feel like you're describing my 2 1/2 year old.
You should teach them about waste around the world.
How has screen time changed in your girls at this age?
i wish this would work for our family. we have an explosive child and any attempts to do things right flops...
Hi Ashley, I have a 12 month old boy and am looking for a resource that has a large amount of ideas /Montessori activities for each stage. one that says, ok, as your child gets closer to x age, begin to introduce this this and this. Do you have anything like this or is there a material that has this laid out for moms without a Montessori training?
The book "the Montessori toddler" has some good ones. I bought on Amazon.
There is a company called Lovevery which sends you monthly (or selected) packages with information and activities/toys.
How do you explain war, like in the ukraine. To your child?
You don’t, in my opinion. Let them be little kids and quit burdening them with stuff they don’t have the capacity to understand. Wait until they are a little older.
Is it too late to introduce an 8 year old to montessori way?
There is no homework in Montessori actually
Why have you deleted my comment? I wasnt rude or anything..? :(