For Parents: Why Some Firstborns Have Specific Challenges | The Solutions

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  • Опубліковано 22 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 183

  • @gregorycanady2530
    @gregorycanady2530 7 місяців тому +67

    I am the second born. My older brother struggled in life. I often thought, that he struggled because he had inherited every bad genetic trait of generations of our maternal and paternal lineage. I began to think that mother nature dumped all of these unfortunate traits in him, because she didn't know if there would be a second born, and therefore, felt my older brother might represent her only option! Then I came along. As I progressed, I began to feel, that his presence before me, cleaned out all the problems with the gene pool, before I was consummated. He's gone now, and had a very unfortunate, and very sad life. I, on the other hand, was born free of the alcoholism, smoking, and learning problems he suffered with. I lived through a war (Vietnam), got my college degree, helped my mother till her death, and have been the unworthy recipient of many of God's blessings, while living a life free from the negative experiences he encountered. I look back, and wish I had been more understanding...........

  • @jumokeidowu8013
    @jumokeidowu8013 5 місяців тому +27

    I know first born who are hardworking, served in families, who did their best academically,, who showed discipline but still had challenges.
    In so many homes first born set the standard for work ethics in families.
    Challenges truly exist for firstborns

  • @adebayoolufemi2074
    @adebayoolufemi2074 5 місяців тому +17

    The first child of our family exhibited all of these that you've highlighted. He was the smartest of the family but achieved barely nothing. Thank God he's doing well now.

  • @ogunmoyerotayo441
    @ogunmoyerotayo441 8 місяців тому +6

    I'm really blessed by your teaching sir. God bless you sir

  • @t.kayoung5304
    @t.kayoung5304 8 місяців тому +20

    Dr Apoki, thank you for this timely message. You spoke it all to me , I am a 1st born and 34yrs old now. I am getting married and will be more careful in chosing a wife with the guidance I got from this broadcast . I like the things of God, a born humanitarian and have had a good up bringing from my parents and my Mom in particular...
    Joining from Cameroon

  • @JoshyDonn
    @JoshyDonn 6 місяців тому +27

    Im a first born and almost everything you said was true, im trying to help myself. its a little late but better late than never.

    • @JoshyDonn
      @JoshyDonn 6 місяців тому

      @ServingSoul for sure. ty

    • @bukolaigunbor5105
      @bukolaigunbor5105 Місяць тому +1

      Is never too late so far you still have breath. The Lord will see you through❤❤❤

  • @vnonkwinn6233
    @vnonkwinn6233 19 днів тому +1

    This man has helped me to put together and confirm many missing pieces in my existence. Ty 🤔🤔🙏🙏 '' From 'VQJ, Boston USA.

  • @chidozienwosu1345
    @chidozienwosu1345 8 місяців тому +25

    Dr apoki was my childhood doctor. His very good with what he does. I could vividly remember how he took care of me, when I was down with malaria and typhoid fever.

  • @okeyugwuegbu9817
    @okeyugwuegbu9817 8 місяців тому +50

    "the first born son has the excellency of his father's strength, the improvement of his ability, the embodiment of the hope and the future of the family. Therefore if the devil can distract, divert, demoralise, delay, deform and destroy the first born, he can hinder the future of that lineage"... Dr Apoki

  • @olufemiogunba6875
    @olufemiogunba6875 8 місяців тому +34

    The distractions for first born can be challenging.Thank God i did not give up over my Son.With prayer and so many fights to put him on the right path of life,he is now a successful photographer after his university education.All glory to God Almighty.A lot of parents give up and regrets in their old age.

  • @WaayoArag.
    @WaayoArag. 4 місяці тому +4

    I am the first born of my parents; we call the first born "Curad". As long as I remember, I was being the only child who has most responsibilities of the family.
    My family was nomadic pastoralist. I grew up that environment and I used to be goats and sheep herder. When second, third, and fourth children grow up up to teens, I migrated to a urban. I started a new journey of education. I have struggled a lot; everybody, who have experienced studying in an envoronmemt where your parents are not, knows the awaiting challenges.
    With the help of God, I graduated and got job. Still, my family depends on me; specially economically.
    I feel like I have not gone under similar chilhood that my same age children those were not first borns gone. I feel like I was on duty since I can remember!
    It has negatives and positives both.

  • @vnonkwinn6233
    @vnonkwinn6233 19 днів тому

    Your Humor is the icing on the cake, and moreover a blessing

  • @preciouskunyenje7660
    @preciouskunyenje7660 6 місяців тому +4

    In everything that has been said. I can testify that it is all true. Being a first born child, I know of my potentials and this video has reflected my greatest weaknesses. It is through God and being with God that can help a firstborn child realise his potential and maximise it. Thanks for the message and may God bless you.

  • @JoyOgochukwu-k3q
    @JoyOgochukwu-k3q 5 місяців тому +3

    Thank you so much sir, this is a very timely message. I’m a first daughter, all what you have said are resonated with me 😢

  • @redeemerliveth2589
    @redeemerliveth2589 9 днів тому

    Let the Mercy of the Lord thunder over all first borns and reversed any negativity, bondages, repeated , battles ,cycles, ordinances over our lives , Abba show us your manifold Mercy,

  • @FKOsings
    @FKOsings 8 місяців тому +2

    Great message!!! Timely sir. God help us

  • @magdaleneivuegbe8748
    @magdaleneivuegbe8748 8 місяців тому +7

    God bless you sir, I'm a firstborn, thank Gid for the hard life my parents gave me. The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom.

  • @thomsonpepeah3943
    @thomsonpepeah3943 8 місяців тому +4

    I am hear always, and this is changing my life for good. Thank you so much for this priceless mentorship, Papa. God grant you long life, Dr Charles Apoki, the great man of our time.

  • @Neilok-ul2go
    @Neilok-ul2go 8 місяців тому +4

    Hi Dr Apoki, I have just discovered you and this is the second video I watched. I have listened many preachers but this one is far one of the best I met. I am a first born and I found myself in your talks with so many challenges that appear in my life. Thanks for these insights.

    • @drcharlesapoki
      @drcharlesapoki  8 місяців тому +2

      You will overcome. His grace is sufficient for you.

    • @Neilok-ul2go
      @Neilok-ul2go 8 місяців тому

      👍

    • @drcharlesapoki
      @drcharlesapoki  8 місяців тому

      Welcome. You can call me on +2347052136763

  • @olaakinwumi2372
    @olaakinwumi2372 8 місяців тому +13

    Instead of following a wizkid and I’m not referring to the singer follow those ahead - Dr Charles always has something sensible for you.

  • @edwarrior2526
    @edwarrior2526 8 місяців тому +3

    Am blessed by this message. First son challenges is a big puzzle I don't understand

  • @TGGTheGloryofGod
    @TGGTheGloryofGod Місяць тому

    This is the best message of the year. ❤❤❤❤ thank you, Dr. Charles.

  • @hanaibarwa2154
    @hanaibarwa2154 8 місяців тому +2

    Your words are truly inspiring fulfilling Isa 50:4

  • @ציון-ה7ה
    @ציון-ה7ה 8 місяців тому +5

    Thanks for the costly wisdom

  • @claudedaiga5897
    @claudedaiga5897 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you very much Dr Apoki for this message. It's always a plus listening to you all the way from Cameroon. May the Almighty God bless and keep you.

  • @nkemeke-nt2ps
    @nkemeke-nt2ps 5 місяців тому +1

    This is very educative. It will help a lot in training up our children, not only the first borns. Thank you.

  • @jahmai6962
    @jahmai6962 6 місяців тому +11

    I had the most challengess ever I went so bad I can only go good. God taken over my life 2013 now I have businesses and god told me to give inheritance to my 5 kids and 25 grandchildren. It’s all complete. When I was giving them inheritance in my head I could hear cheering as a crowd. My whole linkage is sorted 200 years worth I’m 32 33 this month. All praises to god no other way.

    • @chiomaumunna4832
      @chiomaumunna4832 5 місяців тому

      Do you mean you saw yourself in a vision giving them inheritance?

    • @TrueMoneyFinance
      @TrueMoneyFinance 4 місяці тому

      @@chiomaumunna4832 no I did it already all physically they are all sorted months ago

  • @kgabochokoe7127
    @kgabochokoe7127 7 місяців тому +4

    Thanks for these revelations. Martha Chokoe from South Africa.

  • @olubunmiezekielagboola4043
    @olubunmiezekielagboola4043 8 місяців тому

    Many thanks for this wonderful expository message. God bless this ministry.

  • @janetmanjemela8372
    @janetmanjemela8372 8 місяців тому +3

    Very true! Watching from Zambia.

  • @janetjanet2364
    @janetjanet2364 Місяць тому

    Thank you sir, almost everything you have mentioned is true about the first borns, also first borns carrys the burdens of parents and younger siblings especially financially someone from poor family can relate , life hits me so hard on both sides. Its a real burden being a firstborn

  • @preciousnnenna261
    @preciousnnenna261 5 місяців тому +1

    I'm so blessed sir, this is a big eye opener

  • @nyamahdunbar3821
    @nyamahdunbar3821 8 місяців тому +1

    VERY SOUND! Thank you, Dr. A.

  • @thankfulforlife
    @thankfulforlife 7 місяців тому +5

    Hilarious yet, insightful Papa😂. Always a pleasure Sir.

  • @chituruoji8939
    @chituruoji8939 8 місяців тому +3

    God bless you for this video Dr Apoki. I can relate to what you are saying.

  • @ernestomale1914
    @ernestomale1914 2 місяці тому

    Dr.Apoki is just so funny 🤣.I like him regardless

  • @dorothymakumba6742
    @dorothymakumba6742 8 місяців тому +1

    I agree with you Doctor. You are my favorite, I relate to some of the traits in you and people fail to understand me. Im proud of Dr.

  • @VeryWickedVibe
    @VeryWickedVibe 5 місяців тому +1

    So much to learn, God bless you Dr

  • @stbarnabas3138
    @stbarnabas3138 8 місяців тому +5

    Strange enough, I can relate with this. I am not the first and the last son. But our first son should rather be the last born and the last born first. He’s 56. We have been praying, binding and loosing for 30years that I could remember very well

  • @kalonjeebless
    @kalonjeebless 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you Sir for this message.

  • @quinzhoffman4984
    @quinzhoffman4984 8 місяців тому +3

    You are an unlimited wellspring of wisdom and knowledge, with a sprinkle of comedy! Thank you!

  • @RealJulianaInspiration
    @RealJulianaInspiration 2 місяці тому

    Great video, thanks. All you said is true.

  • @antonyndungu5514
    @antonyndungu5514 8 місяців тому +2

    Thank you for this wisdom

  • @meka4871
    @meka4871 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you Dr Charles....this is Soo insightful....

  • @JazKicks
    @JazKicks 8 місяців тому +1

    I will keep my son in touch with you! Thank you

  • @assuredfuture4909
    @assuredfuture4909 8 місяців тому +3

    Great wisdom

  • @ukejepaul5848
    @ukejepaul5848 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you Dr this means so much to me .Thank you for sharing sir God bless you sir 🙏. Amen.

  • @kingsley34
    @kingsley34 5 місяців тому +2

    It is nuanced.
    Sometimes firstborns have to be the father to the other children especially in a dysfunctional family. You spend your life taking care of others so much so that your own life is on pause. Talk about that too because our reality as first born children 8s nuanced.

  • @maryedevbie477
    @maryedevbie477 8 місяців тому +1

    Waooo , Dr you are very correct more grace sir , but you made me laugh at the end by saying PG madman

  • @debbiethehealthycook
    @debbiethehealthycook 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you sir.
    This is so helpful sir

  • @JoshuaSamuel-e1v
    @JoshuaSamuel-e1v 8 місяців тому +9

    This is nothing but the truth I have seen it over and over, although am a firstborn without any of these challenges, listening to this video, I was wondering, boy, how did you escape all of these? Because am more like the opposite of all mentioned to the glory of God right from growing up the mentality has been on a super speed, did some small small stupidity, I by myself adviced myself against those things, till tomorrow parents didnt know.😊

  • @stellaakpa9103
    @stellaakpa9103 8 місяців тому +1

    God bless you more sir.

  • @gold-in-melanin7488
    @gold-in-melanin7488 8 місяців тому +22

    The first born often times are spoiled because they were the first child!

    • @successartistry3023
      @successartistry3023 8 місяців тому +3

      That's the root of the problem; entitlement mentality

    • @chinwe8661
      @chinwe8661 5 місяців тому +6

      This is false

    • @t.henderson1478
      @t.henderson1478 3 місяці тому +2

      I beg to differ. Our parents put the burdens on us. In my life since 8yrs of age, I've had to hold my family and incur adult responsibilities at a very early age. Including caring for my sibling, whom my mother GOVERNS with all his foolishness. He's her love child. So I wholeheartedly disagree.

    • @bokhian007
      @bokhian007 2 місяці тому

      I beg to disagree with you respectfully.
      I am a firstborn, I am 40yr not married, graduated d university years before my younger brother… he lived with me while I trained him in school. He got married almost immediately he finished serves NYSC. Today he is married with children while I am still single and shouldering the responsibilities of the entire family all alone.
      May God Almighty delivers us firstborn from every attacks of the enemy, Amen

    • @realkemiadeyemo
      @realkemiadeyemo 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@bokhian007Amen.
      But you can't continue like this o..

  • @ezepatience567
    @ezepatience567 5 місяців тому

    Thank you so much.
    I have been questions things about my life and this answered all.

  • @PeaceEzinwanne
    @PeaceEzinwanne 8 місяців тому +3

    I knew you from CPM Ojike lane. This message is from God and timely.

  • @uzodikepaulinuschukwudi3696
    @uzodikepaulinuschukwudi3696 8 місяців тому

    A wisdom speaking! More grace Sir🙏

  • @adeolaolusi4142
    @adeolaolusi4142 5 місяців тому +1

    I have known this a long time and I am a strict mother to my first born who is a female child. My hubby complains but I know there's no time for pampering because she was taken away from me by her dad since she was 1, I know I will be victorious and she will turn out well

    • @denfolo5224
      @denfolo5224 3 місяці тому +2

      Balance is better; you have to be very strict when needed and very loving when needed. If you go overboard, you will lose her.
      How do I know? I'm a first born daughter.

  • @heraldloshi1864
    @heraldloshi1864 5 місяців тому

    🙏🙏🙏🙏 I am a first born.Thank you for strengthening my armoury.

  • @Aroplain
    @Aroplain 5 місяців тому

    What he said is cool, I’m a first born even with challenges it makes us more stronger and I attack whatever I sees as suspect. Maybe world of those days but this current generation everybody dey para

  • @joyaiwerioghene6452
    @joyaiwerioghene6452 8 місяців тому +2

    THANKS FOR THIS LESSON

  • @olafusitosin4673
    @olafusitosin4673 4 місяці тому

    God bless you too sir.

  • @funmilayookechukwu5148
    @funmilayookechukwu5148 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you, Doctor.🎉

  • @namubirubrendah391
    @namubirubrendah391 8 місяців тому

    This information is eye opening

  • @PhilipApetorgbor
    @PhilipApetorgbor 6 місяців тому +4

    Am first born but am alpha male am very strong and very smart

  • @akpomiesakpomies1573
    @akpomiesakpomies1573 8 місяців тому +2

    Thanks Mentor

  • @TaiwoFolakemiAiyegbayo-qd3hd
    @TaiwoFolakemiAiyegbayo-qd3hd 5 місяців тому

    You're epitome of saviour

  • @christopherchidubem5240
    @christopherchidubem5240 5 місяців тому

    Everything you said, sir, has happened to me, and I am finding my way right now in a foreign country.

    • @EM-qj1cc
      @EM-qj1cc Місяць тому

      May God give the grace. He will see you through.

  • @Lyricalprofesor
    @Lyricalprofesor 6 місяців тому +2

    I was moved to tears after seeing this, as most traits are well observed on me.
    This is a public space, but I honestly need personal mentorship.
    I've been part of the mentorship group for a while now. And I don't know if that would be okay.
    I just need more for me to change this rollercoaster.
    Please help, I'm tired of it

    • @theleastgeneral
      @theleastgeneral 5 місяців тому

      It depends on the family you came out from. The solution is serious prayer, after salvation and close relationship with God. A trusted and anointed man of God can help break demonic ties and yokes.

  • @mercycherisa.5607
    @mercycherisa.5607 8 місяців тому

    This is very insightful

  • @NatureSpeaksTv
    @NatureSpeaksTv 5 місяців тому

    Wow. Great great. Migwo

  • @ugochiee
    @ugochiee 5 місяців тому

    Ure truly our friend

  • @shodapad07
    @shodapad07 6 місяців тому +1

    Mindset of Victor, not of Victim. Amen.

  • @mercycherisa.5607
    @mercycherisa.5607 8 місяців тому

    Thank you for this video Sir

  • @olubunmiezekielagboola4043
    @olubunmiezekielagboola4043 8 місяців тому

    Sir, i wish that this message should not stop here, it should be coming up from time to time.

  • @oliseeziafa2757
    @oliseeziafa2757 8 місяців тому +2

    Wowww ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @kelvinosemeshan7798
    @kelvinosemeshan7798 8 місяців тому

    Sir i laughed when you said Government college "destupidnize" your brain and it was a nightmare to you 😂😂😂😂
    Thank God for the impact.
    We have learnt a lot.
    God bless you sir.

  • @iam_kelvinagada
    @iam_kelvinagada 5 місяців тому

    Amazing Sir, Welldone

  • @allpurpose8678
    @allpurpose8678 8 місяців тому

    Thank you sir, I love you !

  • @georgenwankwo5181
    @georgenwankwo5181 5 місяців тому

    Thank you dear brother.Can somebody be sent to or can i see you.Thank you

  • @Ologun1
    @Ologun1 Місяць тому

    😊😊😊 powerful

  • @GlossololiaMinistryInter-bc1ih
    @GlossololiaMinistryInter-bc1ih 8 місяців тому +1

    This message is just directed to my family

  • @wocannaseilai5983
    @wocannaseilai5983 4 місяці тому +1

    It appears to me that all of these diagnostics can be expressed solely as a function of childhood traumas (which can be caused by inexperience of parents, but most likely to be transferred trauma). Most importantly, any solution for helping these people who are in a tough position appears to address the trauma (directly or indirectly).

    • @Act_92_
      @Act_92_ 4 місяці тому

      This have a similar stand on this subject matter.

  • @ginnmartinuchehara4165
    @ginnmartinuchehara4165 8 місяців тому

    Thanks Aboki our ogo!
    It appears as if this first born issue is more pronounced among the blacks than the whites. Many successful people in the West are first born. Is African religious mentality at work?

  • @happywings15
    @happywings15 7 місяців тому

    Hi Dr Charles how do I push and motivate myself when things are very hard as a first born? I am the first line of defense , it’s hard to know tactics. Please direct me to the books of the bible that will inspire tactics and strategy for when things get hard. Also what you said about getting bad spouses, I want to come back to this when the time comes and remebe to remain strong for what God has and it’s not bad to remain single when it’s in God’s will for me

    • @mavisayorinde8766
      @mavisayorinde8766 7 місяців тому

      Get a mentor, communicate with people, seek advice always

  • @mahanto
    @mahanto 8 місяців тому +3

    do a video for last borns

  • @kalundukandi1807
    @kalundukandi1807 6 місяців тому +1

    Powerful

  • @ruthsmotivationalandinspir9814
    @ruthsmotivationalandinspir9814 8 місяців тому +1

    Thank you Dr Apoki

  • @ajiepaul2247
    @ajiepaul2247 8 місяців тому

    Thank you sir

  • @cityviewvlogs1488
    @cityviewvlogs1488 8 місяців тому +1

    You are very right sir all you said is going on with my first daughter , she does everything about her future half half way , she never give me a listening ear , her Christian life is over religious same pattern of life since she left secondary school, no new idea , church church January to December 😢😢😢😢😢 .

  • @bullaralaska5454
    @bullaralaska5454 5 місяців тому

    thanks you sir

  • @stephentojumoran718
    @stephentojumoran718 5 місяців тому

    Hahahahaha, Dr ....so hilarious butstill making lots of semce

  • @uchennanwosu2488
    @uchennanwosu2488 8 місяців тому +11

    75% of original inventors are forced born😂😂😂😂😂❤😊

    • @crimeandcontroversy9042
      @crimeandcontroversy9042 8 місяців тому

      Are u sure...being inventors does not mean they did not fail

    • @uchennanwosu2488
      @uchennanwosu2488 8 місяців тому +2

      @@crimeandcontroversy9042 They did not because the inventions are walking

  • @olubunmiezekielagboola4043
    @olubunmiezekielagboola4043 8 місяців тому +1

    Dr. Can you please arrange prayer session on this very subject,? And please publicise your address, make us the prayer center on this very important subject.. we dearly

  • @jmlsalley
    @jmlsalley Місяць тому

    If there are two sets of children from two relationships in a home, each with a first born son from the respective men, is the firstborn from the second set considered a firstborn? Is it paternal or maternal favor that rests on the first born?

  • @nancyauthentic6557
    @nancyauthentic6557 8 місяців тому

    Thank u so much sir ❤❤

    • @kapitakapita9114
      @kapitakapita9114 4 місяці тому

      Dr Apoki thank you so much for the wisdom you are delivering to this generation may God bless you and keep you well for this wicked generation, my question is who matters most between the male and female firstborn because the Bible emphasizes about the first born son thank you. am from Zambia

  • @funmilayookechukwu5148
    @funmilayookechukwu5148 8 місяців тому +1

    😂😂😂PG mad man!

  • @JoyOgochukwu-k3q
    @JoyOgochukwu-k3q 5 місяців тому

    Please sir who’s the author of the book from Ground Zero to Hero?

  • @onyekaandy-oghonim7350
    @onyekaandy-oghonim7350 5 місяців тому

    I wish i can bring my son to you sir

  • @antoinettenizeyimana2703
    @antoinettenizeyimana2703 8 місяців тому +1

    Please 🙏 pray for my firstborn son

  • @ogochukwuuzoka3155
    @ogochukwuuzoka3155 8 місяців тому +1

    Post graduate mad man got me roiling on the floor.