Feel Good 101: Not having ambition, and why you shouldn't panic.
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
- hey! this is a really old video and my views have (naturally) grown a little since this was released! i wrote a whole book based on this series which you can find here! amzn.to/2fYAdtK
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Once a teacher asked me, ' What do you want to do when your older ' And I responded with the truth, I told her I wanted to be a hairdresser. And while she'd been encouraging with everyone else in the group she just said to me, ' Oh dear, you could do so much better '
I could barely talk throughout the rest of the group conversation because that comment upset me so much.
Jesus teachers! You can do what you f*cking want to do!
+Pasta I remember once as a kid I said I wanted to look after large mammals at a zoo and my mum just said "so you want to shovel poo for the rest of your life? no". It made me cry so much, still hurts now, I never told her how much it upset me and I never told her any dream I had again. I wish I feel like I could confide in her because I know she would support me, but that killed that part of my relationship with her.
Hazel Waring My faith in humanity is going down(And yelling timber)
Hazel Waring That's so awful. I'm sorry that happened to you.
I think the main thing is that it was a struggle and it did hurt, and still does a bit, but I managed to think through it and get past it. I love my mum and am happy doing what I do. I think the main thing was to acknowledge it is there so I don't let it affect my life. It's like the "acceptance is the first step thing".
Thank you both for your comments xxx
2:57 "I want to be happy."
Recently I've come to realize that's all that really matters.
Thanks Aunt Jemima
I'm panicking. I'm 25, and I still have no clue what I'm supposed to do. I'm dabbling in it tech stuff but I'm so not motivated. I'm looking at other professions, but nothing hits me, so now I'm just working low wage jobs right now and figuring this shit out.
Someone one said that they knew 50 year olds who still have no idea what they want to do, and some 70 year olds who only just realised what they wanted
+Eli Kang And so am I, dude. I'm 25, alone in this for the first time, and all these doors are open, but then I worry about what doors will close depending on which door I choose. I dropped out of college and the one thing that I do well/makes me whole will never finance me. I feel like in this specific era of life, it's natural to panic, but we shouldn't, I don't know. Just know that your comment is my comment.
+Kolby Kauffman Thanks, much appreciated. You can always look at it this way. From the words of the awesome Mike Rowe, society teaches us we have to be passionate about something and pursue it as a career. they tell us it can be done if you just believe and work hard. I find this bad advice. I think a job can just be a job and not define but just help you pursue the things you love to do. people often measure us by what we are.
I was happy to meet the guy. He's a Maryland native, so I caught him at a bar. Yeah, you're right. It's funny. We compare ourselves to others and we think we need to be farther ahead or that our choices are somehow the wrong ones. It's ALL subjective. We are not our jobs,it's just something we can do to better our own lives.
I agree Eli! doing the same, and it sucks when sometimes low wage companies don't want to hire you because you're "overqualified". it's like being on limbo.
Even now, at the age of 22 I love coming back to this video
same here
im 29 now and here i am again after 8 years or more
I’m 22 right now lol
I know this video is old and everything, but I just wanted to let you know how much it means to hear this from someone else. I've really been panicking about my future lately, so much so that it's been causing anxiety attacks and causing my blood pressure to be high from the stress.
I'm only seventeen yet everyone is making me feel like I have to choose right now, forcing college down my throat, and when I did finally choose something, or many somethings, like an artist or an actress or a writer, which is what I really want to do, they tell me to pick a /real/ job, or a practical career.
It's so frustrating and on top of that I have to worry about test scores and finally getting a license and getting a part tine job and so many other things, so I'd just like to thank you for posting this so that I could find it a year and a half later when I need it.
If only I had someone with your mentality to help me through all this I'd be much better off.
Sabrina Ashlynn i get that same reaction, dont worry youre not alone. ive been pressured everyday to plan out my future, which is hard when the thing that you want the most has been constantly rejected by youre parents.....but we're gonna make it through this....!
I'm 14 and earlier this year I had to decide my GCSE options. I was talking to my dad about it and he said oh you should take Spanish and triple science because those are good subjects and they will get you a good job. And I was going to take Spanish. Just for that reason. Fuck that. I realised that I'm shit at Spanish! And as much as I love science, I'm not that great at it and triple science would have gotten me a D or something because I wouldn't have been invested in it, my heart wouldn't have been there. I ended up taking Photography, Art and Music. I'm so glad I did because I can't really draw but I love art. Every time its my art lesson I'm just so happy. I take pretty decent photos, they're not great but I love taking them. And I wasn't going to take music because I get horrible stage fright and to get into the GCSE you had to audition in front of a class full of people and I was fucking terrified but I did it. I overcame my fear because ever since I was 4 or 5 I have wanted to be a singer and god dammit I will make it happen. Because that's what will make me happy in life. Fuck everyone else. I am so excited to start my GCSE's in a couple of weeks. Year 10 here I fucking come!
+ExhaustedEloise Good for you! Stick with it and have fun! :)
Hazel Waring thank you!!
+ExhaustedEloise So happy that you were brave enough to make that decision! Best wishes to you :)
+Eliana Willows thank you! Same to you xxx
I'd love to be strong enough to make that choice
I want to have a career in ballet but all my friends want to be paramedics, police, zoolegists and the army and stuff. I've been feeling like oh. I'm not gonna be successful like them but thanks to you Emma I finally realized. FUCK IT I CAN BE WHATEVER I FUCKING WANT. Thanks Emma.
Yea follow you're dreams! If you got into a business like your friends then everyday when you grow up you'll regret not trying to go for ballet! SO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS!!!! ITS YOUR LIFE DO WHAT YOU WANT
Thankyou Eric Thomas :)
Yeah I'm kinda in the same position as you because all my friends are planning to be veterinarians, doctors, lawyers, and scientists or whatever. Now I'm only in freshman year but some of my friends are already freaking out about it. But I'm with you- be whatever you want, it doesn't matter what your friends or people you won't really care about in the end think.
Dude ballet is so fun. I did it for a couple of years, and now looking back I realize that it's so fun and I wish I was still dancing.
Omg exactly. I don't have the right body shape or feet or the right length of fingers etc. my friends all know I'll never make it and always tell me it's not gonna happen and they all wanna be like doctors and they tell me if I go to a good dance school full time I'll be wasting myself because I get top levels in academic subjects but I can not stand the idea of sitting at a desk solving quadratic equations. Ugh idk what I want I just want a pet whale.
So glad this video exists, makes me so happy ^^
I spent all my childhood wanting to be a vet, and now I'm in the RVC studying vet med which is great, but I am also trying to get into a bit of acting as it makes me happy, no other reason
when she said i want to be happy i got goosebumps wow thats honestly not what i was expecting
Lol same :3
This video honestly helped me.. i am expected to know what i want to do with the rest of my life at the moment but i honestly want to focus on my mentalhealth. I want to be happy and then decide what i want to do job wise...and i have this constand state of panicing over it because everyone around me tells me that " i need to do something"
This hit home so hard. I have had this goal of being like a programmer/IT or whatever in the tech industry since I was a little girl. After beating myself up for not progressing fast enough for years on end I lost all my passion and drive to do it. I have never wanted to go back in time so bad. But I just can't. And it has been driving me crazy this past year. I am questioning every single interest that I supposedly have and try to cling on whatever "smart job" I have an "interest" in but end up questioning it until I panic and cry myself to sleep. I feel like my existence has and never will have any meaning. I'm currently 16 and I have no idea what to do and the loss of the security of that drive I had tears me apart. With all the courage I had, I wrote a note to my dad, because I was too fearful of humiliation and was surprised of the support that he provided. I am visiting a therapist in a couple of days and am trying to not raise my expectations too high but its so hard considering that deep sense of desperation I have now. I wish the best of luck to every single human being going through this right now. Stay strong < 3
as someone in their late 20s, this was very affirming. thank you!
All I'm going to say, is thankyou so much! I'm nearly 18 years old, have no direction, and parents and teachers are worrying and stressing me out. But after watching this, I'm so glad I'm not alone, and that the rents and teachers aren't necessarily right. THANKYOU! (Found you through Carrie Hope Fletcher) :) xx
when a teacher asks me what i want to be when i grow up i say "i want to be happy"
Wishful Daydreamer Productions no, not really
Wishful Daydreamer Productions ^
Ordan Oath I just say taller, because I most likely will be taller! :)
I think you are a great motivational speaker :-)
Woah... I don't think you'll ever read this, but this is. Exactly. Me. Right now. I've never heard it said, no one has ever told me this. I wish my parents, or heck, ANYONE around me as a teenager had told me these things and been supportive no matter what I wanted to do.
I'm 23, and over four years into college, and I never wanted to even start going. I'm under the constant threat of being disowned by my parents; they're the textbook example of the things you're saying. They think I'm nothing if I don't have some college degree and a "respectable" job. I don't want any of it; I NEVER did. But I was shoved into it almost immediately after I graduated High School.
The only thing I ever wanted in my life was a roof over my head, and a simple job that doesn't make me miserable, whatever it may be. After high school, I just wanted to be DONE; forever. And yet... Here I am, fighting my way through college; hating every waking second of my life, searching deep within myself grasping for the tiniest shreds of motivation to finish something I never WANTED to start at all. I've felt like I've been so trapped in my own life, that I've had times where I was seriously considering... Well, ending it.
I just wanted you to know, that this video really reached me, and really resonated with me. And it really means so much to hear it, even if it's not from the people I desperately have wanted to hear it from. So, thank you.
I have a goal, but my problem is that I don't have the drive to actually do everything my best. I don't have a problem with working hard, I just always think that I am going to end up failing no matter what.
I cried while watching this
I'm currently fourteen and in secondary school... I have always said when people asked me that question; "I want to be happy when I grow up" I've always had a very open look on life, and... I have a few jobs that I would love to do, but in the end, happiness is my goal. So... Great message, great video, great person. Love you Emma Blackery! You're awesome!
This moved me to tears because recently everybody's asking me what I'm gonna be after school and my parents are telling me what I should do and what I should study in university! And it's scaring because I have no clue! I can't decide what chocolate bar I want, never mind career! This video made me realise I'm 13 I have years left! Thank you so much, you don't even realise the relief this video has given me! Thank you x
This reminded me of two things.
1) when I was like 11 I was talking to my mom and I had like a C in a class so she was saying how I needed to get my grades up so I was like well as long as I'm happy you'll be ok right and she looked at me and she said not if that means not having good grades
2) again I was talking to my mom and she asked what I wanted to be when I was older and I said tattoo artist because I really love art and I consider myself pretty good at it and it just seems pretty awesome and she looked at me and told me that that wasn't a very respectable job and that I probably shouldn't do it.
I am 14 years old. My mother told me this thing about happiness last year or the year before. And the tattoo thing was the other month.
Grades are not more important than mental health and love/happiness
I hate when people ask me what I want to be because no answer has ever satisfied them. When I said I wanted to be a singer, my mother would yell at me everyday, saying I was disapointing her. I was only 15, and had a job in a factory. she had no job at all. then I started humoring people. if i said i wanted to be a doctor or an astronaut (i really never wanted that) people reacted by telling me i was too stupid to do that. from then on, every time i said i wanted to be something, or changed my mind about my career path like all of us do, I got told I was disapointing, i'm stupid, blah blah blah. Now I'm studying something I like, and I know I'm good at and I'm very happy about who I am now :)
I'm 26, and these videos help way outside of the age range you were aiming for..
I had a career meeting in my final year of secondary school 2 years ago where I said I wanted to work with animals. This woman shot me down and told me there were no career options in that field. She tried to convince me to do horticulture (gardening and plant stuff). Two years later, I'm about to finish my college course in Animal Management and I've never been happier. Moral of the story: Don't always listen to others that think they know you, you know yourself better than anybody, do what makes you happy.
Emma, I'm taking GCSEs soon, and you've made me realize what career I want. I used to always say when asked what I want to do "I want to be a journalist, but I also want to get into a career in music but it's hard to get into.". Now I'm forgetting all of this "But it's hard to get into" crap. I've wanted to do something to do with music since for as long as I remember, but recently I thought that if I did it in 6th form and university it'd be a bad idea. So what if it's hard to get into? Music is what I am passionate about. I don't writing, it's alright but my real passion lies in singing, and playing piano, and soon I'm learning to play guitar and I'll probably be just as passionate. Thank you for inspiring me to actually do what I want to do in life, which is what I promised myself I would do before I even started thinking about careers and the future. I'd just forgotten that you should always go for what you're passionate about.
A couple of months ago, I was entirely certain that I wanted to be a chemist. You know, mix chemicals and find new ways that chemicals could react for a living.
But recently? I'm kind of doubting myself. What if this isn't what I want to do?
I'm feeling hopeless and lonely, not knowing if I've wanted and looked forward to in the school curriculum is what I really REALLY want to do.
I feel like I'm losing my mind, like I'm stuck in a great big hole of 'Oh god what am I going to do'.
I'm in front of my computer most of the time, I don't like to interact with real humans (really it's just my grandparents that have come over during winter break) and would much rather be in an alternate universe with no work to do, and a lover, and I would be older. More responsible. Friends. No worries.
Right now I'm not sure that I want to get a job. I want to be lazy, not a care in the world. Except I feel that I have to get good grades, find a good college, get a job. I don't know what to do, and I'm only fourteen.
I'm scared that I can't do this anymore. All of my stupid fucking homework is piling up, and my mom expects me to get it done. I don't want to do it! I'm already learning so much without the fucking homework, and I get the stupid pieces of paper almost every day.
And...
I don't know what to do.
So true same thing is going on with me and i also get lots of homework and not my parents but my older sis and bro expect me to get A and A* in every one of my subjects im only 13 and doing 1st year of gcse im not superman. Fucking tired of teachers thinking im the smartest teen in the fucking world!!!!!!
guys you're teens.. and teens are expected to fuck up : ) So let yourself fuck up you dont have to make smart descissions early on.. just dont do anything set yourself free from whats bugging you and when you feel less stressed more relaxed and ready to take a pick.. do it then. But dont let anyone pressure you. Cuz noone can decide for you. Not teacher. Not parent. Because it is YOU who will bear consequences ... Im 17 gonna have exams this year ... And guess what ? despite fact that i didnt do homework for 7yrs was never very smart .. Now im curious about history biology languages and i have top grades on 4subjects .. Homework isnt everything and grades cannot determine your worth. Grades dont evalue you as a person... You took a test and at that moment you got a C- so what? if you took it in what a week? you'd get other result. Doesnt mean your're stupid...
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To sum up, I will now quote Matt Bellamy from Muse:
"Do what the fuck you want to, there's no-one to appease."
Ironically the song is called Panic Station.
I'm 16 years old currently and I randomly get asked by people (mostly by my parent's friends during those awkward dinners) what's my dream job/ambition? I just reply "I don't know yet" and ALL of them give me this fucking look as if to say, Gosh! You're already 16! You should have already decided what you want to do for your entire lifetime. Annoys the hell out of me, but you know, you can't be like "Fuck You! I just don't want to get a job that I will end up regretting in the future all right?!" But you know, their your parents' friends so you have to act nice and all in front of them.
I know exactly how you feel - I turned 16 a couple of weeks ago and my mum is constantly nagging me to fill in all kinds of applications for apprenticeships and colleges.
I don't want to do an apprenticeship yet though! I want an extra two years to think about a job that will make me happy! Fffss, stupid parents!
I'm so glad Emma made this video though. I think I needed someone to say that to me more than ever, because I've been really stressed :') Emma rocks!
same here dude! :/
wassup
I had a moment of absolute panic when I felt I had no motivation or ambition to do anything. But I felt relieved after watching your video. Thank you. The most important point I must learn from your video is "Don't give in to the pressure of what other people expect from you''.
*highfives* "Follow your heart, do what your heart wants. Not always your head, your head is not always right." the best quote ive heard in a loooong time! thank you emma ^.^
Since I was 16, I've been constantly asked "What career do you want to go into?" and when I said "I'm not really sure", I got pretty much lectured by everyone that I should really make up my mind, and make sure to go to college (for varying reasons like, "You should go to at least experience it!" and "You won't be able to get a job without a degree!", "Do you wanna be stuck in a minimum wage job for the rest of your life?"). So, I made up a lie. When asked what career I wanted, I replied that I wanted to become a photographer and go to the Art Institute of Phildelphia. Which was and is complete bullshit. (Photography is a hobby I LOVE, but I could never be a professional) But I was just so sick of being lectured and told off for not knowing what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, I just would spout that lie and save everyone time.
I am now 21, and I've JUST given up that lie. I've finally started to respond with, "I'm not quite sure, but I'll figure it out!" and my God I feel so much better not having to lie. Hell, with the cost of college, I don't even know if I want to go! I might do something like vocational school! But I finally learned, that's OKAY. I still get lectured and told off by certain family members, but fuck them. I'd rather figure out what career I want later on in life and be happy, then be stuck in a job or career I hate. (And have wasted thousands upon thousands of dollars on a college degree.)
Also, my Dad is actually super cool with me not going to college when I was 18 or not going to college at all, cause he didn't figure out what he wanted to do (computers) until he was 24. And he just got his 25 years a few days ago, at a job he loves, and will continue doing for a long time. If he'd done what he thought he wanted to do at 18, he'd still be a car and tractor trailer mechanic, and be miserable.
I'm in my 20s and I think this video is for people older then 11, to 19. I very much agree with this even for someone my age is what I am trying to say.
I ACTUALLY WANTED TO HIGH FIVE IN THE SCREEN AND IT WAS LIKE NO
I'm so glad I found this again. I really needed this!!!! I dropped out of sixth form due to my mental health. I felt I needed a job now, my parents constantly remind me that I don't need to right now. They say I need to get better first. Which makes sense but i can't help but think I have to. I've never had a job in my life. I've volunteered and have helped family out at weekends. Thank you so much for this!!! I've struggled this week, since SitC I posted twice a week on both my blog and UA-cam channel (so 4 in total). I did all nighters to meet my goals. I haven't done it for a total of two/three weeks and i forgot yesterday and today I've shut down. Thank you for this. You've helped so much!!!! Thank you 2013 Emma xxxxx
You're one of those people that when I listen to you, you make sense. What you say is believable, you get the point across, and you've actually experienced the things that you talk about. I'm going to show this video to my mum.
i was asked what i want to be when i grow up...i said "everything"
it's going ok...um...still a lot to learn.
Oh hey moss. U not in IT anymore?
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At school, I took Business Studies because my friends were taking it. I ended up sat in a corner by my self thanks to a seating plan in a subject I wasn't evenly remote interested in. At school I didn't take Music because I felt like I needed to know how to play an instrument to be able to do the course and I felt like I didn't (despite owning and teaching my self how to play a guitar). At school I took Drama, because my Mum thought it would make me more sociable. I ended sitting by my self (in a corner again) and by the end of the course I was a wreck of depression and bad attitude that no one wanted to approach.
Those choices affect me today, and are some of my biggest regrets. Missing out on Music gave me insecurities about playing guitar (some thing I once genuinely enjoyed) because I always feel like a fraud who didn't do things the proper way. Drama happened very early on in school (year 9 in terms of the UK schooling system) and it was one of a few thing that has created this sense of depression that I have to deal with every fucking day, And Business Studies happened at the end of school. It isolated me from some of my best friends during a year when I needed them most.
When we don't choose to do the things we WANT to do but instead do the thing we THINK we want to do, we do it because we think that it will still better ourselves. I am a living testimony to how not being the person you are makes your life worse. So what ever makes you feel happy, who ever cares about you and you care about, you want to do with your life, remember the person your planning to be when your older is STILL YOU. If you don't enjoy that subject now, your not going to magically enjoy when your older. If the line of work doesn't interest you as much as your passion does, that isn't likely going to change. What happens at the end of education is called your adult life, and it has to be something you're OK with living or your going be unhappy. And being unhappy sucks.
I get the question "What do you want to be when you're older?" so many times and I always just say "I don't know yet." But actually I'd love to be a traveling writer/photographer, but it's a freelance job and you won't have a stable income. I really want to travel the world for my job and not go on a vacation for a week every year in summer. I hate that in this society you're expected to choose a 9 to 5 job. I really don't want that.
It feels so good to see people my age question the beliefs we are fed from a very young age.....💛
I really like this. Not having an ambition is something that's been getting me down for years and this is the very first time I've actually heard someone say that it's okay. Thanks for this :)
Emma thank you so much for this video. Ever since I was about 2, I've wanted to do music. But my parents said I probably won't make it because that's what loads of people wanted to do. So I picked philsophy and global perspectives (its a hard igsce) to make them happy. But now I realise my parents aren't god. They don't control what I want to be and my ambitions. So I'm going to chase my dream. This video really hit home thank you
This is like the exact opposite of what they say in Career connections at school
I've always wanted to be a musician and to help people but my parents gave always said that I'm not good enough so I should take sciences instead. It makes me feel crap.
You can still do those things.
?
Well fuck them and learn to play the guitar or whatever it is you want to do
Emma literally brings tears to my eyes. It makes me feel so much better about myself and I hope she manages to actually get the message out to everyone because she really is inspiring.
You know what.. You would be a great teacher. Being a teacher doesn't only mean teaching academic subjects, it also includes guiding the young people in their early lives. If I go back to my high school years, I would love to have a youtuber as a teacher. SO much better than someone who made sarcastic comments when I told about bullying.
I would go outside, but it's 11:00 o'clock at night... O-O
+Ushio Bird (UshioBird) Same here 11:13pm
Its 1:16 am for me :)
But it's so much harder to go back to "uni," or what we call college in the US, when you're 35. When you're 35 you might have kids to look after and you probably won't be going anywhere prestigious. How are you going to juggle kids, school, and a job? That's why I want to go to college/uni before it's too late, but I'm afraid of not knowing what to do there.
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There are always babysitters, but yea, good points
+emma skilton I see that...but isn't it the case (at least in America as far as I know) that scholarships only apply for the year right after high school? Meaning if you graduate in May 2016 and you have $10,000 in scholarships, if you don't go to college in August 2016 then you can't use that $10,000?
my mum goes to college to get the right gcses for being a nurse and she's 33 she does night shifts and she has to cope with me my brother and sister so I don't how she copes but she just does
My mother is currently 45 and finishing her second and last yeat in college. She wanted to go after she left high school but got pregnant and couldnt. She now has three children and has been working two jobs all while going to school. It's been tough but its possible.
im 18 and my abitur (final exams in Germany) is in 2 weeks. i have absolutely no idea what to do after that. my parents ask me almost every day what i want to be. but that doesnt fucking help! so i decided to take a year off and do all the stuff i've always wanted to do but never had the time, starting with a trip through europe with my best friend. i hope ill find out what to do during this year. but even if not, im sure it was the right decission. i dont want to study anything just because my parents think i should
Little Miss Obvious That makes two of us. Literally the same situation here. Except for the travelling part. I'm really jealous that you're able to travel Europe. Neither I nor my parenty have the money for that, unfortunately. Anyway.. viel Spaß! ;)
I love the point of this video, that you don't need a ambitious career to be happy because having lots of money and being well off doesn't make you happy. You are one of the best youtubers at giving advice and that is why you are my favourite and always will be.
Thank you so much for this video, really. It not only hit so close to home, but legitimately helped me so much. I appreciate you, Emma, and it more than words can say.
i wanted to take animations but you know the drill, my mom didnt really support that idea cause its too hard to make money! okay, i get that moneys is important but come on do you expect me to be happy doing a job that i dont like and still get paid thousands, yeah the idea of it might sound nice but i'll guarantee you i would hate my life if i did that! i would rather strive and earn money doing the things i love than doing the things i dont!
I wanna be a time lord :D
How can you know what you will want to do for the next 50 years when you're in your teens? Xx
Thank you so much for this! I find that my parents, my mum especially, want me to do something that will make them look good, but when I told my mum that I wanted to be a life coach and that you don't actually need any qualifications to get into it, she told me that I was wasting my life. I'm glad that you helped me feel better about what I want to do with my life :)
Your parents should be so proud of you you bring me so much hope xxx
BE MY MUM PLEASE
I still don't know what I want to be but this video has helped me so much, thank you Emma. The next time someone says "What do you want to be?" I'll say "Happy, I want to be happy, I want to live my life in a normal way and have adventures. I don't need to decide my career. I just know what I want, happiness." Wow, nice little speech there...
Just catching up on this now... to those teens and early 20s people... I'm 35 and I still haven't figured out what I want to be when I grow up. As someone who's been around for a little while - Emma is right. I've never had ambition to be a high flyer. I never wanted to climb the corporate ladder like most of my peers. I ended up in legal because that's what my mum did. Then I ended up in finance because I thought it was a good idea. Struggled with depression for 7 years. Then I was retrenched and it was the best thing. I'm working in a family business now for half the pay that I was in my corporate high-flying job and you know what? I'm happy. This will do. My bosses and colleagues are great fun, I'm close to home, I can afford the little luxuries we all like now and then. ALWAYS aim for HAPPY.
You misunderstand what I'm saying. The point I'm trying to make is that happiness doesn't have to come from a career - you can have a job that isn't your entire life but pays for things that make you happy, which can include moving out, going on holiday etc. People think the key to "success" in life is having a job which you enjoy and earns LOADS of money when really, it's the little things you'll look back on - not paychecks.
thumbed up because you mentioned being a dentist as well as being a doctor. dentists are incredibly overlooked! and i agree with the whole happy thing. moi aussi
Thank you so much for this Emma! I'm going to be writing my Leaving Cert here in Ireland in June and this month I have to pick out what college courses I want to do. I have never been able to stay with one hobby throughout my life and I picked subjects I thought would make my Dad proud. I really want to study radio production but the least I would need is 300 points from my LC exams to do the course. However, because of my subject choices I'm failing because I basically have no interest in what I'm studying. If I could redo it all over again I would! All my friends want to become directors, nurses, business people... and I feel like I'm out of the running. My parent are quite successful, so I have a lot of pressure on me to become just like them.
This video has made me realize that it doesn't matter what happens as long as I'm happy life's okay. So thank you so much for making me see what life is truly about. I have been suffering from panic attacks for the last couple of months from stress and now I think I can relax a bit more because of you.
I am so glad that people like you exist, you are litteraly "the person who gives me hope" that i don't have in my life, i wish we could be friends. Thank you Emma :)
Well, I'm currently 18 and tomorrow is the day I officially quit Uni. And honestly, recently I have began to think that fuck with plans, fuck with other people, fuck with my parents, this is my life and what do I want? I want to be happy. So I almost cried watching this, I finally didn't feel so alone on this.
Thank you so much, you're amazing.
Thank you Emma, until about a year ago i always knew what i wanted to do but then suddenly i didnt know what i wanted and ever since nobody understands me you made me feel like it doesn't matter anymore :)
Considering that I'm 18 years old and an "A" student; every single person that I know is absolutely floored when I tell them I don't really want to go to college right now. Thank you for making this video, I'm 100% sure that I'm not the first with the exact same story but i just feel so much better. Even though you're just a youtuber, and this is just a video, thank you.
I wish someone had told me this when I was 14! I'm now 20 and realizing the same thing you're realizing right now Emma. The only thing that matters is happiness and you shouldn't rush into anything before you know what brings you that happiness. For me it's my family and loved ones, and doing what I thought was right almost made me lose them, and myself. So kids, listen to Emma and go do what makes you happy in life, okay?!
Being six years older and three years out of University I can say that Emma hit the nail on the head. I still work a shit retail job despite having two degrees, neither of which I was passionate about. Here is why I'm not sad: My career does not define who I am. I am 27 and it is finally after college where I am steering life in my own direction, rather than the one my peers wanted for me. My hope is this time I'll actually find what it is that I want out of life, not someone else. Cheers.
Thank you so much for this video. This is just what I needed to hear as I'm in 11th grade (2 years away from college in the U.S.) and I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life. My parents have been pressuring me to choose what I'm going to do for the rest of my life and telling me that the things i might actually be interested in won't earn me a good enough career. It's just like you said, my main goal is to be happy and I'll do whatever it takes to achieve that goal.
I have really unrealistic dreams too, author or in a band, it's been stressing me for ages, thank you for this, because no one else has ever told me that they also feel like this too
I know so many people who made the mistake of taking the "sensible" option for their parents and now they are miserable. I was so lucky to have parents who saw that I was head over heels in love with media and encouraged me to pursue that with everything I had.
I am the kind of person who tries to do everything to make everyone else proud of me and ill grow up and be crazy successful, and its not because my parents or anyone told me to but I just felt like I had to, like it was expected of me. You made me realize that I can do what I want and that nobody else's opinion really matters, I want to be Happy too. Thanks Emma.
Rewatching this series makes me a much calmer person. Thank you, Emma.
You've achieved your goal that you said from your first Feel Good 101 video, you changed at least one person's outlook on life, and that's me. Thanks for being rad and honest.
im 21 and i only just realised this. people just need to chill the fuck out and learn that not everything is about getting a career. how i havent stumbled upon your channel until today is baffling as we are so similar. you're rad keep on being happy
This video is exactly what I needed. I'm taking more classes this summer for university because my adviser told me I needed to do all these things if I wanted to graduate on time and go to Vet school(who knew you'd even guess my job choice). I thought that's what I wanted to do ever since I was 7 and I love working with animals and volunteering, but now I'm not sure I like what I'm doing at school. So thanks for telling me I don't have to make someone else proud and I can do what makes me happy.
I finish my degree next Tuesday in Chinese studies. I've always loved languages and I love learning it. I'm so glad that it has nothing to do with proving something to my parents or anyone else. I'd happily get a crappy job out there as long as I live out there. Great video!
I'm so so glad I came across this video because there is far too much pressure put onto teenagers to always do great in everything and be top of the class,Thank you so much emma!
Thank you!! I still don't have an ambition, I was afraid because I may be left out cuz my friends have that realistic ambition and I don't. But after watching this video, it made me feel better. Thank you so much 💕
You just gave me the biggest smile when you said "I want to be happy". I feel the same way.
Thankyou for making this, it's what I try to tell EVERYONE that asks me what I want to be when I'm older and I don't have a clue
The end made me smile :) Honestly i didn't know what i wanted to do with my life until a few weeks ago. I want to be a school consular because i love school and making people fell better about their problems and making them happy is the best feeling in the world and it makes them feel good about themselves ^^
I think a big part of the video is that not to do what people want you to do find something you love to do and pursue it, because this thing you love to do will make you happy, like if you love drawing become an artist if it makes you happy, but don't let your parents make you do something you don't enjoy doing
Ugh, I'm so glad I found this video. I'm not doing well in school (I'm not doing bad, but I'm doing "good" either), and even though I've wanted to be an engineer since I was a kid, I'm not really sure if I want to go forward with it.
Thanks so much for this Emma. I'm 17 going into Year 13 and I haven't a clue what to do and I'm really unsure about what I should do at uni or whether I even should. I am much less stressed now thanks to this video!
wait what? There's a year 13??
It's the 2nd year of sixth form
Emma, I feel you so much on the subject and I really like your opinions and it keeps me grounded for what I should be wanting for myself, but it's so bad that going back to uni in adulthood costs a lot of money, at least in my country.
This is my favorite Feel Good 101 episode and I feel like everyone could benefit from watching it! Well done Emma, this video made me feel... worth something..... which is nice since that doesn't happen often. So thank you, a lot.
This is seriously my favourite series of Emma Blackery's and I felt like it had helped a lot of people including me
I watched this outside. My parents were in the house arguing as always so I slipped outside the back door with my phone. This is so inspiring. While I've planned to teach for years, I now know that these are the things I'm going to tell my kids and students. You also just helped me decide what grade I'm gonna teach lol
I'm glad that I can replay this for myself all the time. Makes me feel good about not having ambition even at 34 years old. I do a lot of things that make me happy, lucky that I can. (granted I know being this way I can't get to my end goal thanks to society norms) But this video makes me feel good about myself right now, especially after coming off my antidepressants 2 years ago. Thank You Emma!.. Never to old to need to hear positive life messages. Keep it going Emma, your doing great!!
This video is wonderful. I always felt guilt for not having an ambition. Many people I know have said, or would say it is weird for not having a dream job or goal, specially after completing High School. It's not a big deal, but people make it seem like so. I'm happy someone can say that it's okay, like you did in this video. It makes me feel better at least. Thank you.
i really needed to see this video. im in 8th grade, and a bunch of my friends are applying for big fancy high schools and have major goals and already know exactly what they want to do with their lives and im just going to my local public high school, which im 100% happy with because i really like the school. but i have been feeling pretty lame because im not already working towards my future career, whatever that may be. ive had no ambition, and its felt crappy, and im happy i came across this video. it gave a very new idea: that we should try to do what makes us happy. its so strange how little this is taught to us. this video is the first ive been hearing of this goal to be happy. no its always been 'get a job, make good wages.' i just want to be happy
We chose our GCSE options last year. Whilst in our school a language is optional, the teachers expect the 'top students' to take a language. They told us we wont get anywhere without a modern foreign language. I did not pick one, because I HATE learning a language, and terrible at it. Teachers picked on me for this, called me in for discussions about WHY NOT. They made me feel like I was stupid for not picking it.
In year 10 now (UK) and I am SO GLAD I picked drama instead. I LOVE THE SUBJECTS i have chosen, and I see the sort of things the language students are doing. I would of hated it.
I believe I don't 'need' a language gcse to be happy. People told me I was closing doors, I said if those doors need a language to open them, them I don't want to go through them. I want to pick what will make me happy.
Emma, you are wise beyond your years and give good sound advise. I wound up pursuing a field of study after not going anywhere in another area and subsequently got into a career choice that is stressful, unrewarding and basically where I do not feel happy or fulfilled. It took me a long time to finish college, going mostly part time, but I was determined to finish otherwise I feared looking like a failure to myself and to others. I am twice your age, married with kids and own homes so I am more or less stuck with my choices. I could always get an MBA since in America and possibly elsewhere a bachelors degree carries the weight of a high school diploma did 2 to 3 decades ago. Tens of thousands more dollars for a fancier piece of paper. The kind of happiness you can achieve with yourself and life and career choice can seldom be bought. If I could only turn back time.
I wish I could give this video a hug. Emma, You don't know how much this means to me but thank you!
I know exactly what I want to do with my life as I grow older, but that something doesn't involve education. My family and even some of my friends don't really understand and I don't have their full support, but you've helped to reassure me that I'm on the right path :)
One of the best messages in a video EVER. THANK YOU!!!! AMEN!!!! You don't know how much this affected me... I've been saying the same thing for a while now.
I've spent every day since I graduated from High School panicking about what I'm going to do now. This helped me so much, thank you
Great Point about ambition not having an end goal. I started editing video 15 years ago for the fun of it and i now have some bad ass editing skills that i showcase on my youtube channel. Great production value on the videos!
I bloody love this video! I was very nearly pushed into doing a Law degree, but while I loved the A Level I did, it isn't all murder and manslaughter and I knew I would hate the contract stuff. In about a month, I am off to do a degree in Drama which I absolutely adore. And I'm glad I didn't give in to the stereotypical career path of other people who are supposedly "clever" because I would end up hating my job. It may not have a steady income at the end, but I love it and that is what matters.
I really enjoy your attitude. You should do more of these kind of topics because I think you are a natural. I am 33 years old and enjoy your advice. Please keep going.