Paper dolls are also easy to tear or 'break', so he could be implying that her feelings were just an overreaction. The more I learn about him, the more I find out how despicable he truly is. Definitely seems like he's just putting the blame on her..
@@mendwithmere Are you sure you're a therapist? You're not being objective with your "reaction". It seems like you just get mad at the lyrics. A good therapist would react objectively, you're sending personal attacks to John Mayer, even though Taylor Swift has strong psychological issues. I feel like you're just a really strong Taylor Swift fan, remember, a therapist takes things objectively, something that you're definitely not doing.
@@williamlouisloewen5799 woman makes a good point some mAn with three first name (who thinks no can tell he is a misogynist): aRe YoU oF yOuR sUrE qUaLiFiCaTiOns? iMmA jUsT sAy HoW yOu'Re SuPpOSeD tO rUn YoU'rE cHaNnEl
He almost uses the melody “hush little baby,” to infantilize her for being a child while he lusted after her for being youthful…. He mocks her for her age while dating her/fetishizing her for her age… so messed up?!?!?!
Also in “Ours” (about him) she mentions her dad not liking his tattoos - which further supports your chiffon theory. Her family didn’t support the relationship.
Oh man I LOVE Ours but Idk if I can like it the same when it's about JM. Kinda makes sense that she's in denial and has been ostracised by the family and she's going nope, this is mine and I'll protect it. Not healthy. I thought it was about the media like I Know Places
John- "I prayed apon a young woman. Now that she's called me out for that, I'm going to call her a child." Yeah that makes you sound so much better John.
No one knows the real story ,some people know a bit ,some don’t know anything at all ,and others just make assumptions to make the story sound better or worse ,but we all jump to conclusions bc she was young ,old enough but she was young ,and also a woman ,but I think people seriously need to move on from something that happened more than a decade ago ,people make mistakes ,no one is perfect ,*spoiler alert* not even Taylor ,and we need to be more empathetic with each other tbh ,people change and grow ,and I think we should too
@@miguel77077 sorry but this topic with always be talked about. As it should. John Mayor was old enough to know better. He made his bed so now he has to lie in it. It has nothing to do with her being a woman. You can say we “assume” shit but these are the facts: he was 32 and she was 19. Thats sick. I don’t need to know their entire relationship to know that that age gap is weird. Anyone that old preying on teenagers are bound to be bad partners, because they’re bad people. Taylor continues to release music about this because it deeply affected her. You probably never even listened to any of her songs about John, its heart breaking. Again, we’re going to continue to talk about it as long as the songs are here. And I don’t feel bad for John, like I said he was a grown man and knew what he was doing. He also shows no remorse and insulted Taylor as if he wasn’t the sick adult on the situation. News flash: just because people are disgusted by John and what he did to Taylor, doesn’t mean we don’t know Taylor isn’t perfect. But in this situation, John Mayor was obviously the bad guy. Don’t need to be a genius to see that
@m5578 for one, she was BARELY 19, he was fucking over 30. For two, Taylor has very much told the real story in her writing, as she always has. This very clearly was extreme trauma for her. He quite literally took advantage of her, *took her virginity*, manipulated her, sullied her name, harassed her, and certainly abused her mentally and emotionally. Quite literally the only thing we don't know is if there was physical abuse but I think it's safe to assume there likely was to some degree considering, again, HE TOOK A 19YR OLD GIRLS VIRGINITY (that absolutely needs to be stressed) and groomed and manipulated her. There is no defense for him when all of his properly aged exes have experiences and tellings of abuse and manipulation from him. You should reassess your morals if you think it should be kept quite and swept away when even the artist herself has spoken about it. She only said to not harass him/tag him online as people were doing as to not give him the attention in droves he gets off on.
I mean if it was the opposite and taylor now at 33 dated a 20 year old and she manipulated him a groomed him she would not get the same response he did. There ya go another double standard.
@@marleycymon3512 she was old enough and smart enough ,and she still decided to date “old men” she literally dated one after John and her broke up 😂 so ,if she doesn’t learn?
Taylor wore a black chiffon dress to the 2009 grammy's. According to a quick google search, in 2009, she was approximately nineteen or twenty depending on which month. This was a DIRECT reference to Taylor.
John Mayer is the bad boy Women wanted to control but couldn’t, it’s not like he forced her to be in a relationship, Once he dumped her all y’all turned on him like he can’t get another Taylor swift look alike by the snap of a his fingers and that’s what makes y’all mad that he has the power of women have and played your favorite artist. He even bagged Jennifer Aniston suck on that
@@Jcruises_ this isn't merely the brag you think it is. I don't know why you're here defending a man that is known to have burned out not just Taylor but SEVERAL women. If you had the ability to understand the manipulative and disgusting this man is, you wouldn't be proudly declaring that he has the power and that he plays with them. Your comment further proves why the tide turned against this bad boy.
@@iridescent_dreams Taylor is basic looking skinny chick, just because all y’all sing her stoopid songs doesn’t the rest of us do, and you’re talking about John Mayer an 7 time Grammy Award Winning. That’s dude can stand on any corner and pic up another 100 Taylor Swift’s look a like.
Would've Could've Should've has had me feeling so raw, but you rolling your eyes and scoffing at Mayer's audacity made me giggle so much. Your insights are so helpful and your presence is so calming. I have my own WCS relationship and your compassion is so appreciated.
ours being about him actually makes it a really dark song. it was intended to be a sweet love song, but given the context makes it almost eerie. the song talks about people not supporting the relationship. in dear john she says that "she looks back and regrets how she ignored when they said run as fast as you can". so people not being supportive were really just people warning her to get out. the song tells a story of a girl who's trapped and convinced possession is love. and that makes it absolutely devastating and makes me hate him so much more.
I always believed our was about some long lost love of hers or one that she made up. John!? *gulp* it's one of my favourite love songs from hers... And it was dedicated to a slime ball!? 😔😩😩😭😭😭 It was better in my fantasy mv. Now I cannot unsee it
I knew about this song but I never listened to it, I never realized until now that "and winter runs a bit too small" might imply that he knew about Taylor's eating disorder... whether she told him herself or he figured it out on his own, that's a disgustingly low blow.
That’s why assuming is never okay, I’m actually really happy today because John just said publicly in his radio station literally 10 minutes ago that this song wasn’t written about Taylor swift 😆😂
The fact that he mentiones "keeping his undershirt" in the same verse as the red scarf to me is a reference that she shouldn't have clung to Gyllenhaal the way she did? Maybe she compared the two of them and Mr Mayer didn't feel validadet enough? All too well after all IS a love song while Dear John has no room for anything positive about the relationship or him.
YEES, I've always thought that we as Swifties shouldn't go hard against Jake Gyllenhaal, that relationship probably shouldn't have happened but after all it also had lots of beautiful moments and I don't think Taylor has ever said she regrets it. Also, judging from her songs about him I get the feeling that he was also very invested in the relationship and he wanted it to work out, I mean he took her to his sister's house and "you talk about your past thinking your future was me", and that instead of being something deeply traumatic, like her relationship with John Mayer, it was just a relationship that both wanted and ultimately it ended up not working out because they were ill equipped to deal with the age gap they had and probably because he wasn't a good boyfriend
@@xgise Both sound toxic and inappropriate. And both men should have known better. Just because John set the bar so incredibly low and seems to be the worst of the two doesn’t mean Jake shouldn’t still get shit for his part in a relationship he shouldn’t have pursued.
Another thing that immediately thought of with this song is how it sounds like a lullaby. He is constantly accusing her of acting like a child and speaks condescendingly to her. Which, like you said, just CONFIRMS what an actual creep he is.
Maybe she was acting like a child. And the problem is that she wasn’t a child, so she shouldn’t act like one, she was spoiled and in fact needed to grow up. I don’t see any problem on he saying that. He wasn’t attracted to her because she was childish. Otherwise he wouldn’t say grow up. This song is very sarcastic and the lullaby vibe for me is genius and suits the song perfectly, and that’s why he is a great songwriter instead of dairies song style she used to write back then. More recently, with the maturity I assume, her lyrics are getting deeper in a poetic aspect, I found it more interesting now.
@@fuanaaraujoA 32 year old should never even look at a 19 year old that way. it doesn't matter what Taylor said or did. he groomed and abused someone. "Finally twenty-nine Seventeen would never cross my mind" - 29 by Demi Lovato
The gold and blue reference sets my teeth on edge because Taylor Swift has written So Many songs about both colours in relation to dresses, and how she felt about love. Which, yes, there's only so many colours... but it really feels like the trauma of this relationship shaped how she subconsciously viewed herself in future relationships. I wouldn't put it past her.
Well after Reputation and onward she only refers to Joe Alwyn as blue and gold, so to me I think it’s her reframing the ideas of what love is and what a supportive partnership is supposed to look like. These colors used to mean sadness, loss, a power imbalance, but now she has taken ownership or them and she awards them to someone who knows her worth and treats her with respect and uses them to show look this is what real golden love is supposed to be. You’re blue, and maybe you are sad “ocean wave blues, don’t want no other shade of blue but you, oh damn never seen that color blue” but she wants to be there for him at his lowest points because at his core he is golden he is pure of heart and well intended and they are on the same page and the same level. So to me it feels like this big reclamation
The way he mentions the red scarf, tying it back to All Too Well…and then saying she should’ve kept his undershirt…the way that Jake kept her scarf…I cannot with this man
Ikk so disgusting :(, however it would’ve made a lot more sense if this song was actually about Taylor. John just publicly announced in his live radio station that this song was not written about Taylor swift 😂😆, I swear this dude is an absolute genius 😭
My understanding of "paper doll" is the way you fold and cut paper to produce a long chain of "dolls" connected by their hands. Hence, multiple dolls (multiple people) in the one person.
This is also how I thought of it when it first came out. I thought the whole song was him kind of saying she is thin and of no substance, obsessed with her image and what clothes she wears, and has multiple personalities. It felt like a cheap attack. But this video picked up on so much that I didn’t, especially now that I’ve gone back and looked more into all of it. The “cut the cord” line made it sound to me like he’s saying she needs to grow up and be her own person - cut the cord from her family. (Once again trying to isolate her and get her away from her support system)
“Cut the cord and pull some strings…” is a reference to her family. As in cut the umbilical cord, “grow up” and that her family doesn’t have her best interest at heart as they are only pulling her strings as she is only a puppet. “And if those angel wings don’t fly someone’s gonna pain you another sky” is also a play off the nursery rhyme “Mamas gonna but you a mockingbird” again another jab at her being a child and her family having control over her.
Great analysis however it would’ve been credible if this song was written about Taylor, John just announced publicly in his radio station literally 10 minutes ago that this song was written about Taylor 😆😂😭, I swear this man is an absolute genius 😂
I think "Sure was fun being good to you" shows me that he never actually viewed her as a person, beyond the reference to her being a doll (he doesn't think women are people, consciously or subconsciously). He was happy being good to her - so long as it made him happy or that he got something out of it. He had fun treating her 'good' (how good, John, really?), but that was all it was to him - fun. BTW - she wore Black Chiffon in her Debut Era. It's the black dress that "Kimber" is wearing at her Funeral in her recent video. Anyways, He's telling on himself. It was all just a game of fun to him until she called him out for his behavior. He has said some pretty messed up things about his exes and sex life for years and years.
exactly, it gives straight up 'i was good to you just for fun' vibes. i havent dug deep into the song lyrics yet but as soon as i heard these lyrics i saw red flags. as if being good to someone was a fun activity (that they didn't really deserve it) and not a basic human decency.
I took "black chiffon" to mean quit playing trauma victim, funeral sad, damaged person. Also goes with a paper doll putting on outfits to suit the situation and saying she's overreacting. Also "was it too far to fall for a little paper doll?" - seems like he's implying that she was more concerned about her image than actually damaged by him.
May I just say that you seem lovely. You come across as very knowledgeable and understanding. It's a wonderful combination for someone in your line of work. Trust me, I would know. I've been in and out of therapy since I was a teenager. I really enjoy watching you dissect these songs and I think you're spot on with your comments. I, too, unfortunately, was groomed by an older man like Taylor as a young teen. Hearing you take her side over his makes me feel like you're taking mine as well. It's good to know there are people like you in the world. I'm really glad I found this channel
Thank you for the massive compliment! I hate that you were preyed upon too and there are shitty people in every field, including therapy, so I’m sorry if you ever came across a therapist that wasn’t supportive to you. Also, I do take your side, it’s messed up and needs to be talked about. Sending you ❤
Oooh and also with you saying his writing is at first grade level could be another way of pointing out how she is a child. Completely agree taylor is an absolute goddess!
I get fangirls are brainless, but seriously? John Mayer is critically accredited as an amazing song writer with amazing lyrics to match. Continuum alone is deeper than anything Taylor has ever done. It’s not even a debate. You’re defending the same girl that goes through boyfriends like she goes through shoes remember?
Did y'all catch how that one part where he said If those angel wings don't fly someone's gonna paint you another sky sound like the lullaby "if that mockingbird don't sing, Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring"?
Him mentioning the undershirt, to me, meant how sometimes the woman will keep some piece of clothing of the man she just slept with. I visibly cringed at this line considering what we learned in Would've Could've Should've.
You’re totally the friend that’s just as offended as it if happened to her! And that’s me too! And I don’t even have a friend who’s like that for me 😂. But I will forever be that person that’s like yeah I’m pissed off too, let’s talk mad shit! ❤
Even if you leave the context, the song is so inferior to Dear John and Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve. He just used one melody for the whole song. Was he really the more mature one?😅
I think the reference to the seasons was their troubled relation ship. “Made for fall” is likely falling in love, winter being too small might be about kind of that starving time of winter , less love/ love is too small. Mint green and spring might be her getting money from the writing about them and growing after the relationship, hence “my love didn’t cost a thing”. Just a theory. I don’t think it’s as simple as getting fat , johns lyrics are usually more symbolic.
The tone and cadence changes for "And if those angel wings don't fly Someone's gonna paint you another sky." I knew I recognized it from somewhere. it sounded so familiar to me. It reminded me of childhood. Then I realized that is because it sounds like the lullaby Hush Little Baby. Gross. So many thoughts on that tangent...but I am going to skip to the base of the song and the man who wrote it. He is obviously a narcissist. When you are so focused on yourself and do not think you can do any wrong lines become blurry (Taylor Swift recognizes that in Dear John) It appears to me that through his narcissistic tendencies that he feels smart; probably even vindicated, in his own right, by comparing her to a child. Not even realizing that this narrative of "oh she was too immature, too young...etc." only highlights the fact he is a predator.
Wow. I love your videos and this one is great. The dress he gave her blue and gold and she said in “Dear John” ‘The girl in the dress cried the whole way home…’ he really responded to her and trying to say oh I bought you that dress…horrible guy
I kinda think the angel wings line is him accusing her of playing the victim, like so many people like to say about her. He's saying put on angel wings, like she's pretending to be innocent, but when the wings don't fly it's because she's not, and someone will paint another sky because he thinks she'll keep getting treated the same way because it's her that's the problem. But maybe I'm giving him too much credit. He's never really been a very deep lyricist.
@@OnAeeir ah yes, the depth of "Fathers be good to your daughters cause daughters will live like you do. Girls become lovers who turn into mothers, so mothers be good to your daughters too" What a mastermind.
@@jenniferlindemann7192 oh u wanna take one line from one song that was made for radio an do that ok surer you just shown you dont know what your talking about and havent listen to hes music even paul simon who i consider to be one of the greatest song writters of all time has said john mayer is a genus song writter i mean just this song here is full of metaphors that u yourself struggled to breakdown
Mine just called me his doll and laughed. After a year I asked why that was funny (I was tiny and only looked 12 at 17 so I assumed it was something to do with my stature). He said, "You know what a doll is? An empty headed plaything"
PLEASE do a video on Taylor Swift’s “Innocent,” where she’s totally falling into the stereotypical narcissistic trap of wanting to save him from what he’s done to himself
One thing that might be a stretch, I know Red is mostly about Jake Gyllenhaal but in Begin Again Taylor says "he didn't like it when I wore high heels" and in Paper Doll he says "strap into some heels that hurt"
That’s the thing though I think begin again was the new relationship with Jake and how she thought it would be different and I think that line is definitely John Mayer based Or else maybe they both were like hey don’t wear heels you need to be small and minute and inferior be my young arm candy and don’t step out of line, don’t have your own thoughts or opinions or feelings or needs
@@Jellybeansatdusk yes! I agree in that begin again might be the beginning of her relationship with Jake but your second theory also makes sense, they were both douchebags lol 😂
Honestly I think you gave him too much credit on some of the metaphors- he's a very surface level individual. Also the narcissism to go on an interview to talk about how you are a recovering "ego addict"- I literally cannot wait for Speak Now TV cause if Would've Could've Should've is anything to go by it's going to be so self-reflective and a lot of her fans are now older and can understand the implications of a 13 year age gap relationship at 19 and the vault tracks are going to be chef's kiss
heres some math for ya taylor was born in 1989 john was born in 1977 they dated in early 2010 for a couple of months this makes them 12 years apart and makes taypor 20
@@OnAeeir October 16, 1977 and December 13, 1989 indeed does make them 13 years apart for a time. not sure what the difference 12 or 13 years really makes when one of them is only 19. at 19, even 6 years.. meaning the other person is 25.. is a BIG difference in maturity and life experience.
@@caitlinkeating8177 well yes for a short time but they dated in 2010 jmaking her 20 and its pointing out the manipulation of her sayin shes 19 but if u have an issue with that what about a 19 year old dating a 16 year old? as taylor did when she was 19 what about a 31 year old with a 40 year old as john was 31 an jennifer was 40 or no problems with those? cause there would be if the rolls were reversed
True true ,the only mistake here (and I actually love John for this, this debate has literally been going on for years ,which makes it look even more genius 😭) this song isn’t about Taylor swift 😂, he literally just announced publicly 15 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song was not written about Taylor swift ,I swear this man is an absolute genius for this 😂😆, he just saw the world burn in flames and swifties get triggered by their own ideas and assumptions 😭
btw for everyone who thinks this song is about Taylor swift (myself included) He just said (in his live radio station) it was not about Taylor swift 😆😂😭, I really wanted it to be about Taylor but apparently IT IS NOT about Taylor swift lmaooo ,I swear John is a GENIUS!! 😆😆😆
Your eye roll is epic lol. Taylor's people will have had her look at this for sure. Btw, are you familiar with the "Dear John" letter that numbers of servicemen received during WWII, informing them that their partners had found somebody else? And I don't recall anybody anywhere referencing an old country song by the same name.
It just makes me angry that men get to treat women like this and it’s accepted but when a women speaks u she is called a bitch or slut for having an opinion or feeling about someone I still can’t believe in 2022 it’s still accepted 😣 Just like men have feelings and opinions so do women! I don’t think I want to hear his name again It just upsets me too much and obviously he still has affected Taylor that it wakes her up in the middle of the night
I listen to this song cuz I was curious to his response, it only serve to cement my hate for him even more lol. To top it off I got introduced to him through “Dear John “ then I researched about him, definitely not the way you want someone new to find out about you. I’ve lived through abuse, I don’t listen to any of his music I don’t want any association to someone like him.
The man is a musical genius. I bet more than half of you John Mayer hating people have jammed out to a song of his more than once. Watching someone on UA-cam try and deep dive into a song you don't like doesn't make you a Dr. It just makes you a critic.
The funny thing is that he just publicly announced 20 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song was NOT written about Taylor swift 😂, so he literally just sat there for 11 years watching swifties scream and get triggered by their own assumptions, bro I swear this man is an absolute genius 😂😭
I’m surprised no one (that I’ve seen comment 😊) has mentioned the 22 people in one being a jab at multiple personalities disorder, now known better as DID. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve seen narcissistic abuse where someone says something like that to insinuate a persons “level of crazy” by comparing them to a very serious mental health disorder. I speak as someone with DID and it was hurtful for me to hear what he said in those lines because I feel like that a lot and there’s a lot of shame around dealing with the symptoms, especially when people like him add to the stigma of making fun of people who maybe ARE 22 girls in one - which I can only hope to be a part of the beautiful change in this world that allows people to identify as such and be unconditionally loved and supported I know it’s hard to understand but it’s like having all these people with conflicting viewpoints/needs that literally most often contradict each other. Most often occurs with early childhood trauma because a person isn’t able to establish a sense of self. It’s rather logical actually. I can only hope that wasn’t a secret struggle for Taylor and put on display as narcs tend to do to drag someone through the mud. Either way it’s so hurtful to see a good person like her suffer these jabs ❤️🩹 To end on a positive 🌈☀️ Lots of love to all who need it!💗💟♥️
Does he have an original thought? A lot of those words are hers. Ya know, maybe if he took all those quotes and made an album it might be successful. And to belittle someone in claiming their feelings are nothing or overactive is the pure definition of narcissism. Shame on him.
I think it's possible he wrote Assassin ( from Battle Studies) about her also. The song is about him, the "assassin" meeting someone who also turned out to be an assassin. He's known to write songs about his exes, as is she.
I know you’ve got a lot of requests lined up… but if you want to look at John’s side some more, there’s the song Half of My Heart, which Taylor was featured on? It gets somewhat psychological.
I always thought there was so much irony in that song, because the lyrics felt degrading to the person he’s talking about but she was featured in it. Like sometimes we miss all these things and at that age it makes sense. When you haven’t experienced a lot in regards to relationships, especially adult relationships, it makes sense that you don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into
...except he was dating a child. She had the word TEEN in her age description. If you think that because it was legal it was ok, please go ahead and stay away from children.
Thoughtful, compassionate reaction and so inciteful. Thank you for your work on this. I know it will be so beneficial to many who truly need to hear this.
Have there been any studies as to what underlies the creation of a douchebag? Just curious. I feel a little bit sorry for this "man". Also, for being acclaimed as a brilliant songwriter, this is one of the most poorly composed songs I've ever heard. It sounds like a 10-year-old tried to write it... and failed.
In reference to the black chiffon - a black dress to me with signify a funeral. And since she broke up with Taylor Lautner in November 2009, the same time she started with Mayer. it seems that perhaps he wants her to “come out of mourning”. Just a thought.
Im a year late but I think the undershirt was a reference to the red scarf from Jake. Meaning she was saying that she affected Jake so badly that he kept her scarf. So since John affected her so badly, that she should have kept his undershirt. Insinuating that she never got over him, like Jake never got over her.
Is there anyone here that doesn’t think John Mayer is the worst person alive?? He’s done bad things but also, he’s become self aware over the years of his issues, I once seen him in an interview admit he is what he referred to as, a recovering ego addict. He’s not all that bad I swear lol he’s worked on himself
He’s not only a great human being ,He is also a genius bro ,he just announced like 20 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song wasn’t written about Taylor swift 😂😆, it’s funny to think that he has sat there for 11 years watching the world burn in flames ,and swifties getting triggered by their own assumptions 😭, this dude is a genius tbh 😂
I know this was kinda meant to be an off-the-cuff reaction video, and It's definitely clear that we're not offering therapy to the Johns of the world but the Taylors... but I'd be curious to see what, if anything, would be your professional advise to someone like this. Say you have a client come in and this is their idea of giving their side of the story and it's as transparently an attempt to dodge and shift blame as this song is... what's the move? (Of course, there's also the option of just not taking them on as a client).
The way I was revolted when I heard this song. Like im a minor, and hearing this makes me so mad. He's not defending himself, he's just jabbing at others, why? because thats all he can do to defend himself cause somewhere deep down, he knows he is wrong, like that interview abt Dear John. He entirely blamed Taylor but it takes 2 to ruin a relationship. And I dont know why he's so mad. If you can talk about people's sex life with you the why can't they talk about how you're narcissitic in a relationship? And talking about your sex life which is supposed to be VERY PRIVATE INFORMATION makes me want to barf. Sure you can tell your friends and your family but the entire world? That experience is supposed to be private and safe. If the other person agree to do that with you means they trust you. You, Mr. John Mayor have broken that trust. And you expect people to stay quiet and then you write songs like "Paper Doll". Oh my god this just makes me feel so disgusting.
My 1st thought was that paper dolls are flat and 2 dimensional and that feels really gross if hes thinks of her like that. He is appalling. Absolutely disgusting.
I don't think that John Mayer means to call Taylor child by referring to her as a paper doll, rather I think he's trying to call her, flat, fake, and two-dimensional, just an image on paper. But it is revealing that this is his insult to Taylor. It shows that he does think of her as a child and likely targeted her because she was a child.
@@miguel77077because John said so? Ofc he won't admit he's still bitter about this drama, that's why he was sending Taylor those long ass emails crying like a baby
Ugh. Same. I almost didn’t watch this because I didn’t want to hear his voice. I feel so grossed out. It’s crazy that he’s so much older than her but he’s always been the one that acted like the child. As you said, she took blame for her part in it and he’s taken zero accountability even though he a grown man chose to have an adult relationship with a child. At least take responsibility for that. Also I just know it kills him that she’s 100% a better song writer than him and there’s nothing he can do about it but cry about her writing a song about him. Seriously. Look at this song compared to Dear John and Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve. My 10 year old niece could’ve written a better song.
Also for all his words about her writing Dear John to hurt him he clearly wrote this to hurt her. And then once again she took responsibility for her part in this in Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve when she said she was living for the thrill of hitting him where it hurts. Even though we all know Taylor writes to process her feelings. She still admitted she was trying to hurt him at least by releasing Dear John. But he who is 13 years her senior will never admit that. Even in this song he released to hurt her he’s still pretending he was good to her.
Also I think when he says “Was it too far to fall for a paper doll” he’s implying that she’s fake and can’t handle anything real and that’s why she ran from him rather than anything he did. When in reality she ran because he is mentally and emotionally abusive. He wants her to believe that this is what love is. That the way he treated her was love. Which goes back to him saying he was good to her. I’m so glad she knew better. That she found real love.
What really struck me about paper dolls is just how arse the lyrics are. Like, I expected a good song that is made contextually dodgy by the situation but its really just bad. There's no coherent message or theming. He insults her for having no personality or autonomy beyond her looks, whilst also complaining that this girl with no autonomy didn't appreciate him enough but also she's actually a machiavellian schemer who uses men to portray herself like an angel? Like...John, she can't be devoid of personality and simultaneously evil. Then there are all the references to her music which serve no purpose other than referencing her music. Why is she like specifically 22 girls? It's because she wrote a song called 22. What is the significance of the Moroccan red? Its because she has an album called red. Our of context, these lines are meaningless
Amazing video! I’d never listened to this song before, but when he wants her to “take this dress of gold and blue” I thought of gold medals and blue ribbons…. Kanyes not the only one claiming responsibility for her fame….even worse John wants her to believe he can do for her what her parents could never
This song genuinely sucked I listened to it for the first time the other day and I straight up out loud just blurted out that it sucked. Uggg he’s just a big creep.
The jab about her weight is even sad bc TS has now said she has developed an ED. Not saying he knew that then but wouldn’t be surprised if he contributed
Gold and Blue dress remind me of this optical illusion dress were some people see said dress in blue and others in gold? Well, maybe another way to discredit her feelings and what she experienced. Which can be seen as he isn´t acknowledging of his behavior at all. Who is surprised of this narrative?
This is what he came up with, after calling Dear John "cheap songwriting"... What is this...??? And why cant ANYONE take this song seriously, he asks... How on earth can someone take this seriously, when it just seems like a challenge of "how many Taylor Swift references can you fit in one song"...
The chapter in Jessica's book was one of the most abusive things I've read. I can't even imagine..... it's awful. I love the music but can't bring myself to go see him
I really like how he tries to drag her for being a young girl still discovering herself and not being fully emotionally mature… like yeah John that is sorta why your relationship with her was so creepy. Everything about this song just highlights why 32 year old men shouldn’t date 19 year olds, and yet he can’t see how this is calling himself out even worse than any song Taylor wrote.
His 2010 interview with Playboy tells you everything you didn't want to know about John Mayer. What an egotistical, despicable creep. I can't hear his music without thinking of it 🤮 Jessica Simpson decided to never have anything to to do with him after that.
@@Moonsong_ you can think of it however you want but that doesn’t mean it’s true lol, he just announced it’s not about her ,but yeah I mean ,one can think the sun is green
@@miguel77077 please, I’d like you to find, in my answer, a part where I say it’s confirmed that the song is about Taylor. I said it is most likely to be + it’s not like he can’t lie. The song seems to be about her so much that most of the listeners think it is, it’s hard to accept that an idol you like can do something bad, but you’ve got to get over it, it happened, he tried to sneak out of the situation and failed. However, I’m not saying it is in any way confirmed about her, but I would totally agree with anyone saying it is.
@@Moonsong_ well it’s not like Taylor can’t lie about eveything that happened because 99% of his ex’ think he’s not a bad person ,not to mention that Taylor’s best friends are best friends with John ☠️. But I never said you said that btw i just said that you implied that bc I literally said “John announced that the song is not about Taylor” but yall swifties will do anything to be right even when you’re wrong 😂, I just think it’s genius that John waited this long to tell us bc I really enjoyed seeing swifties scream and cry for no reason ,it’s embarrassing how yall idolize a person to the point where you treat her as a god ☠️, but it’s your life I can’t really do much about that ,but like I said in my first comment John said it was not about her but wtv helps you guys sleep at night ig
Paper dolls are also easy to tear or 'break', so he could be implying that her feelings were just an overreaction. The more I learn about him, the more I find out how despicable he truly is. Definitely seems like he's just putting the blame on her..
Omg how did I not see this and mention this!!! Right on point
@@mendwithmere Are you sure you're a therapist? You're not being objective with your "reaction". It seems like you just get mad at the lyrics. A good therapist would react objectively, you're sending personal attacks to John Mayer, even though Taylor Swift has strong psychological issues. I feel like you're just a really strong Taylor Swift fan, remember, a therapist takes things objectively, something that you're definitely not doing.
@@williamlouisloewen5799
woman makes a good point
some mAn with three first name (who thinks no can tell he is a misogynist): aRe YoU oF yOuR sUrE qUaLiFiCaTiOns? iMmA jUsT sAy HoW yOu'Re SuPpOSeD tO rUn YoU'rE cHaNnEl
@@williamlouisloewen5799 the real therapist will help the one who is being damaged or being abused and not the abus3r
@@williamlouisloewen5799 lol John Mayer isn’t her client 😂 what are you talking about
He almost uses the melody “hush little baby,” to infantilize her for being a child while he lusted after her for being youthful…. He mocks her for her age while dating her/fetishizing her for her age… so messed up?!?!?!
Hence: "sexy baby"
Also in “Ours” (about him) she mentions her dad not liking his tattoos - which further supports your chiffon theory. Her family didn’t support the relationship.
“My mother accused me of losing my mind” in Dear John
Oh man I LOVE Ours but Idk if I can like it the same when it's about JM. Kinda makes sense that she's in denial and has been ostracised by the family and she's going nope, this is mine and I'll protect it. Not healthy. I thought it was about the media like I Know Places
Exactly but people’s acting like he was a monster or something like that when clearly he wasn’t
@@jessicahogan7248 samee
@@jessicahogan7248 we can like that Taylor wrote it
John- "I prayed apon a young woman. Now that she's called me out for that, I'm going to call her a child." Yeah that makes you sound so much better John.
No one knows the real story ,some people know a bit ,some don’t know anything at all ,and others just make assumptions to make the story sound better or worse ,but we all jump to conclusions bc she was young ,old enough but she was young ,and also a woman ,but I think people seriously need to move on from something that happened more than a decade ago ,people make mistakes ,no one is perfect ,*spoiler alert* not even Taylor ,and we need to be more empathetic with each other tbh ,people change and grow ,and I think we should too
@@miguel77077 sorry but this topic with always be talked about. As it should. John Mayor was old enough to know better. He made his bed so now he has to lie in it. It has nothing to do with her being a woman. You can say we “assume” shit but these are the facts: he was 32 and she was 19. Thats sick. I don’t need to know their entire relationship to know that that age gap is weird. Anyone that old preying on teenagers are bound to be bad partners, because they’re bad people. Taylor continues to release music about this because it deeply affected her. You probably never even listened to any of her songs about John, its heart breaking. Again, we’re going to continue to talk about it as long as the songs are here. And I don’t feel bad for John, like I said he was a grown man and knew what he was doing. He also shows no remorse and insulted Taylor as if he wasn’t the sick adult on the situation. News flash: just because people are disgusted by John and what he did to Taylor, doesn’t mean we don’t know Taylor isn’t perfect. But in this situation, John Mayor was obviously the bad guy. Don’t need to be a genius to see that
@m5578 for one, she was BARELY 19, he was fucking over 30. For two, Taylor has very much told the real story in her writing, as she always has. This very clearly was extreme trauma for her. He quite literally took advantage of her, *took her virginity*, manipulated her, sullied her name, harassed her, and certainly abused her mentally and emotionally. Quite literally the only thing we don't know is if there was physical abuse but I think it's safe to assume there likely was to some degree considering, again, HE TOOK A 19YR OLD GIRLS VIRGINITY (that absolutely needs to be stressed) and groomed and manipulated her.
There is no defense for him when all of his properly aged exes have experiences and tellings of abuse and manipulation from him. You should reassess your morals if you think it should be kept quite and swept away when even the artist herself has spoken about it. She only said to not harass him/tag him online as people were doing as to not give him the attention in droves he gets off on.
I mean if it was the opposite and taylor now at 33 dated a 20 year old and she manipulated him a groomed him she would not get the same response he did. There ya go another double standard.
@@marleycymon3512 she was old enough and smart enough ,and she still decided to date “old men” she literally dated one after John and her broke up 😂 so ,if she doesn’t learn?
Taylor wore a black chiffon dress to the 2009 grammy's. According to a quick google search, in 2009, she was approximately nineteen or twenty depending on which month. This was a DIRECT reference to Taylor.
The Grammys are always at the beginning of the year and her birthday is at the end of year
John Mayer is the bad boy Women wanted to control but couldn’t, it’s not like he forced her to be in a relationship, Once he dumped her all y’all turned on him like he can’t get another Taylor swift look alike by the snap of a his fingers and that’s what makes y’all mad that he has the power of women have and played your favorite artist. He even bagged Jennifer Aniston suck on that
@@Jcruises_ this isn't merely the brag you think it is. I don't know why you're here defending a man that is known to have burned out not just Taylor but SEVERAL women. If you had the ability to understand the manipulative and disgusting this man is, you wouldn't be proudly declaring that he has the power and that he plays with them. Your comment further proves why the tide turned against this bad boy.
@@iridescent_dreams Taylor is basic looking skinny chick, just because all y’all sing her stoopid songs doesn’t the rest of us do, and you’re talking about John Mayer an 7 time Grammy Award Winning. That’s dude can stand on any corner and pic up another 100 Taylor Swift’s look a like.
Would've Could've Should've has had me feeling so raw, but you rolling your eyes and scoffing at Mayer's audacity made me giggle so much. Your insights are so helpful and your presence is so calming. I have my own WCS relationship and your compassion is so appreciated.
ours being about him actually makes it a really dark song. it was intended to be a sweet love song, but given the context makes it almost eerie. the song talks about people not supporting the relationship. in dear john she says that "she looks back and regrets how she ignored when they said run as fast as you can". so people not being supportive were really just people warning her to get out. the song tells a story of a girl who's trapped and convinced possession is love. and that makes it absolutely devastating and makes me hate him so much more.
I never heard Ours but I loved Dear John. I'll have to listen to Ours.
I was just thinking that. Eerie is right.
I always believed our was about some long lost love of hers or one that she made up. John!? *gulp* it's one of my favourite love songs from hers... And it was dedicated to a slime ball!? 😔😩😩😭😭😭 It was better in my fantasy mv. Now I cannot unsee it
Brilliant analysis. Spot on! This man child is mean…& dangerous. Just subbed
Wait "ours" is about John?!?
It hurts the fact that Taylor also wrote a song like Ours for someone like him
Yup
And Story of Us, also a great song
The difference in how she refers to his exes going from “lipgloss smiles” to “tired lifeless eyes” gets me every time.
@@RustyPaige im in tears
no bcs this is kinda ruining ours for me
I knew about this song but I never listened to it, I never realized until now that "and winter runs a bit too small" might imply that he knew about Taylor's eating disorder... whether she told him herself or he figured it out on his own, that's a disgustingly low blow.
Has Taylor acknowledge she has an eating disorder? thanks, I'm a new fan, believe it or not.
@@sueecavanauyes, She has talked about in miss americana
That’s why assuming is never okay, I’m actually really happy today because John just said publicly in his radio station literally 10 minutes ago that this song wasn’t written about Taylor swift 😆😂
@@miguel77077 Taylor literally said the same thing about Dear John. Celebrities are allowed to lie to you.
The fact that he mentiones "keeping his undershirt" in the same verse as the red scarf to me is a reference that she shouldn't have clung to Gyllenhaal the way she did? Maybe she compared the two of them and Mr Mayer didn't feel validadet enough? All too well after all IS a love song while Dear John has no room for anything positive about the relationship or him.
So so true!!❤
YEES, I've always thought that we as Swifties shouldn't go hard against Jake Gyllenhaal, that relationship probably shouldn't have happened but after all it also had lots of beautiful moments and I don't think Taylor has ever said she regrets it. Also, judging from her songs about him I get the feeling that he was also very invested in the relationship and he wanted it to work out, I mean he took her to his sister's house and "you talk about your past thinking your future was me", and that instead of being something deeply traumatic, like her relationship with John Mayer, it was just a relationship that both wanted and ultimately it ended up not working out because they were ill equipped to deal with the age gap they had and probably because he wasn't a good boyfriend
@@xgise Both sound toxic and inappropriate. And both men should have known better. Just because John set the bar so incredibly low and seems to be the worst of the two doesn’t mean Jake shouldn’t still get shit for his part in a relationship he shouldn’t have pursued.
@@mendwithmereexpect the song is not written about Taylor 😂
@@xgiseExactly this. Jake might have been a bad boyfriend but John is a bad PERSON
Another thing that immediately thought of with this song is how it sounds like a lullaby. He is constantly accusing her of acting like a child and speaks condescendingly to her. Which, like you said, just CONFIRMS what an actual creep he is.
Maybe she was acting like a child. And the problem is that she wasn’t a child, so she shouldn’t act like one, she was spoiled and in fact needed to grow up. I don’t see any problem on he saying that. He wasn’t attracted to her because she was childish. Otherwise he wouldn’t say grow up. This song is very sarcastic and the lullaby vibe for me is genius and suits the song perfectly, and that’s why he is a great songwriter instead of dairies song style she used to write back then. More recently, with the maturity I assume, her lyrics are getting deeper in a poetic aspect, I found it more interesting now.
@@fuanaaraujoA 32 year old should never even look at a 19 year old that way. it doesn't matter what Taylor said or did. he groomed and abused someone.
"Finally twenty-nine
Seventeen would never cross my mind" - 29 by Demi Lovato
"heels that hurt" reminds me of "he didn't like it when i wore high heels but i do" from begin again (the song from red)
The gold and blue reference sets my teeth on edge because Taylor Swift has written So Many songs about both colours in relation to dresses, and how she felt about love. Which, yes, there's only so many colours... but it really feels like the trauma of this relationship shaped how she subconsciously viewed herself in future relationships. I wouldn't put it past her.
Well after Reputation and onward she only refers to Joe Alwyn as blue and gold, so to me I think it’s her reframing the ideas of what love is and what a supportive partnership is supposed to look like.
These colors used to mean sadness, loss, a power imbalance, but now she has taken ownership or them and she awards them to someone who knows her worth and treats her with respect and uses them to show look this is what real golden love is supposed to be. You’re blue, and maybe you are sad “ocean wave blues, don’t want no other shade of blue but you, oh damn never seen that color blue” but she wants to be there for him at his lowest points because at his core he is golden he is pure of heart and well intended and they are on the same page and the same level.
So to me it feels like this big reclamation
Gold is always used in reference to pure love. First in “the best day” then lots in lover and folk lore “Daylight” and “a invisible String”.
The way he mentions the red scarf, tying it back to All Too Well…and then saying she should’ve kept his undershirt…the way that Jake kept her scarf…I cannot with this man
yuck
Ikk so disgusting :(, however it would’ve made a lot more sense if this song was actually about Taylor. John just publicly announced in his live radio station that this song was not written about Taylor swift 😂😆, I swear this dude is an absolute genius 😭
My understanding of "paper doll" is the way you fold and cut paper to produce a long chain of "dolls" connected by their hands. Hence, multiple dolls (multiple people) in the one person.
Wow. So good. I may need to redo this video bc I missed so many parts
oh yeah and from that i also kinda see him implying that she's just like any other girl and isn't anything special which is just really kinda gross
This is also how I thought of it when it first came out. I thought the whole song was him kind of saying she is thin and of no substance, obsessed with her image and what clothes she wears, and has multiple personalities. It felt like a cheap attack.
But this video picked up on so much that I didn’t, especially now that I’ve gone back and looked more into all of it.
The “cut the cord” line made it sound to me like he’s saying she needs to grow up and be her own person - cut the cord from her family. (Once again trying to isolate her and get her away from her support system)
which lines up with “you’re like 22 girls in one”
@@avamaeoneill yes!
“Cut the cord and pull some strings…” is a reference to her family. As in cut the umbilical cord, “grow up” and that her family doesn’t have her best interest at heart as they are only pulling her strings as she is only a puppet. “And if those angel wings don’t fly someone’s gonna pain you another sky” is also a play off the nursery rhyme “Mamas gonna but you a mockingbird” again another jab at her being a child and her family having control over her.
Great analysis
Great analysis however it would’ve been credible if this song was written about Taylor, John just announced publicly in his radio station literally 10 minutes ago that this song was written about Taylor 😆😂😭, I swear this man is an absolute genius 😂
I think "Sure was fun being good to you" shows me that he never actually viewed her as a person, beyond the reference to her being a doll (he doesn't think women are people, consciously or subconsciously). He was happy being good to her - so long as it made him happy or that he got something out of it. He had fun treating her 'good' (how good, John, really?), but that was all it was to him - fun. BTW - she wore Black Chiffon in her Debut Era. It's the black dress that "Kimber" is wearing at her Funeral in her recent video. Anyways, He's telling on himself. It was all just a game of fun to him until she called him out for his behavior. He has said some pretty messed up things about his exes and sex life for years and years.
And "good to you" also feels very double entendre to me, like he's being cheeky cuz he knew he was being a total jerk, as well.
exactly, it gives straight up 'i was good to you just for fun' vibes. i havent dug deep into the song lyrics yet but as soon as i heard these lyrics i saw red flags. as if being good to someone was a fun activity (that they didn't really deserve it) and not a basic human decency.
reaching here
Some part of this song sounds so much like a lullaby and it creeped me out
So so true
i think him asking “was it just too far to fall?” was alluding to her asking “don’t you think 19s too young to be messed with?”
I took "black chiffon" to mean quit playing trauma victim, funeral sad, damaged person. Also goes with a paper doll putting on outfits to suit the situation and saying she's overreacting. Also "was it too far to fall for a little paper doll?" - seems like he's implying that she was more concerned about her image than actually damaged by him.
May I just say that you seem lovely. You come across as very knowledgeable and understanding. It's a wonderful combination for someone in your line of work. Trust me, I would know. I've been in and out of therapy since I was a teenager. I really enjoy watching you dissect these songs and I think you're spot on with your comments. I, too, unfortunately, was groomed by an older man like Taylor as a young teen. Hearing you take her side over his makes me feel like you're taking mine as well. It's good to know there are people like you in the world. I'm really glad I found this channel
Thank you for the massive compliment! I hate that you were preyed upon too and there are shitty people in every field, including therapy, so I’m sorry if you ever came across a therapist that wasn’t supportive to you. Also, I do take your side, it’s messed up and needs to be talked about. Sending you ❤
About the winter dress running small, it makes me think he was aware of her eating disorder and was trying to take a jab at that
Stop 😭
Now I feel like crying about that
if thats true that’s genuinely gross
and the “make yourself wings and if those wings don’t fly blah blah” is a reference to a children’s bedtime story 😩😩 “hush little baby”
Exactly!
His writing in this song is at first grade level. Let’s be real. Taylor is a goddess when it comes song writing.
Oooh and also with you saying his writing is at first grade level could be another way of pointing out how she is a child. Completely agree taylor is an absolute goddess!
Lol, listen to the music, grade 1, bahahahaaaa…..ok
Well in all fairness, many of her songs are pretty basic. But yeah
I get fangirls are brainless, but seriously? John Mayer is critically accredited as an amazing song writer with amazing lyrics to match. Continuum alone is deeper than anything Taylor has ever done. It’s not even a debate. You’re defending the same girl that goes through boyfriends like she goes through shoes remember?
I love Taylor. But i absolutely hate these ‘swifties'. Are you dumb? Paper doll is very well written
I love watching you become a steadfast Taylor Swift stan
Did y'all catch how that one part where he said If those angel wings don't fly someone's gonna paint you another sky sound like the lullaby "if that mockingbird don't sing, Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring"?
You should totally do “bigger than the whole sky”
Him mentioning the undershirt, to me, meant how sometimes the woman will keep some piece of clothing of the man she just slept with. I visibly cringed at this line considering what we learned in Would've Could've Should've.
Never thought of it this way
Yes, but she drove home crying in her dress.
You’re totally the friend that’s just as offended as it if happened to her! And that’s me too! And I don’t even have a friend who’s like that for me 😂. But I will forever be that person that’s like yeah I’m pissed off too, let’s talk mad shit! ❤
Even if you leave the context, the song is so inferior to Dear John and Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve. He just used one melody for the whole song. Was he really the more mature one?😅
I always thought the "cut the cord" lyric was another jab at her mother.
Definitely
HOLY FUCK IS THAT A JAB AT HER MOTHER DYING OF CANCER????
Alternative title: Therapist rolls her eyes at John Mayer
I think the reference to the seasons was their troubled relation ship. “Made for fall” is likely falling in love, winter being too small might be about kind of that starving time of winter , less love/ love is too small. Mint green and spring might be her getting money from the writing about them and growing after the relationship, hence “my love didn’t cost a thing”. Just a theory. I don’t think it’s as simple as getting fat , johns lyrics are usually more symbolic.
This guy you are talking about is a legend ..
Black chiffon could always be about that black dress lyric in her Tim Mcgraw song.
Yes! Ahhh I have missed so many good points on this song, I may need to redo
Also there is a picture that often comes up of the two of them together at some event and her dress is black, looks to be chiffon.
The tone and cadence changes for "And if those angel wings don't fly Someone's gonna paint you another sky." I knew I recognized it from somewhere. it sounded so familiar to me. It reminded me of childhood.
Then I realized that is because it sounds like the lullaby Hush Little Baby.
Gross. So many thoughts on that tangent...but I am going to skip to the base of the song and the man who wrote it. He is obviously a narcissist. When you are so focused on yourself and do not think you can do any wrong lines become blurry (Taylor Swift recognizes that in Dear John) It appears to me that through his narcissistic tendencies that he feels smart; probably even vindicated, in his own right, by comparing her to a child. Not even realizing that this narrative of "oh she was too immature, too young...etc." only highlights the fact he is a predator.
Wrong. Swift fucked with the wrong dude.
Wow. I love your videos and this one is great. The dress he gave her blue and gold and she said in “Dear John” ‘The girl in the dress cried the whole way home…’ he really responded to her and trying to say oh I bought you that dress…horrible guy
You said purple, pink sky, and I immediately thought of invisibile string.
😊 yes
I kinda think the angel wings line is him accusing her of playing the victim, like so many people like to say about her. He's saying put on angel wings, like she's pretending to be innocent, but when the wings don't fly it's because she's not, and someone will paint another sky because he thinks she'll keep getting treated the same way because it's her that's the problem.
But maybe I'm giving him too much credit. He's never really been a very deep lyricist.
ever listen to hes music? literally one of the most deepest lyrricist of the past 20 years
@@OnAeeir ah yes, the depth of "Fathers be good to your daughters cause daughters will live like you do. Girls become lovers who turn into mothers, so mothers be good to your daughters too"
What a mastermind.
@@OnAeeir You really have to broaden your horizons if you think his lyrics are deep 🤭
@@jenniferlindemann7192 oh u wanna take one line from one song that was made for radio an do that ok surer you just shown you dont know what your talking about and havent listen to hes music even paul simon who i consider to be one of the greatest song writters of all time has said john mayer is a genus song writter i mean just this song here is full of metaphors that u yourself struggled to breakdown
@@AC-jl7hb name a couple for me before i bother with responding further to this silly comment
Mine just called me his doll and laughed. After a year I asked why that was funny (I was tiny and only looked 12 at 17 so I assumed it was something to do with my stature). He said, "You know what a doll is? An empty headed plaything"
I’m sorry. That’s cruel.
Loving all the eye rolls thank you 😂
It was on overdrive 😂
PLEASE do a video on Taylor Swift’s “Innocent,” where she’s totally falling into the stereotypical narcissistic trap of wanting to save him from what he’s done to himself
One thing that might be a stretch, I know Red is mostly about Jake Gyllenhaal but in Begin Again Taylor says "he didn't like it when I wore high heels" and in Paper Doll he says "strap into some heels that hurt"
That’s the thing though I think begin again was the new relationship with Jake and how she thought it would be different and I think that line is definitely John Mayer based
Or else maybe they both were like hey don’t wear heels you need to be small and minute and inferior be my young arm candy and don’t step out of line, don’t have your own thoughts or opinions or feelings or needs
@@Jellybeansatdusk yes! I agree in that begin again might be the beginning of her relationship with Jake but your second theory also makes sense, they were both douchebags lol 😂
I thought begin again was the beginning of her relationship with Connor Kennedy who she dated in 2012.
Black shifon dress could be a refrance to the picture to burn video. It was one of her most view video around the time she dated him.
Honestly I think you gave him too much credit on some of the metaphors- he's a very surface level individual. Also the narcissism to go on an interview to talk about how you are a recovering "ego addict"- I literally cannot wait for Speak Now TV cause if Would've Could've Should've is anything to go by it's going to be so self-reflective and a lot of her fans are now older and can understand the implications of a 13 year age gap relationship at 19 and the vault tracks are going to be chef's kiss
Are you delusional? John is the most metaphorical person in all of pop music. He speaks in metaphors and imagery literally constantly. And always has.
heres some math for ya taylor was born in 1989 john was born in 1977 they dated in early 2010 for a couple of months this makes them 12 years apart and makes taypor 20
@@blownspeakersss No, he's not! Im afraid you're the delusional one 🤷
@@OnAeeir October 16, 1977 and December 13, 1989 indeed does make them 13 years apart for a time. not sure what the difference 12 or 13 years really makes when one of them is only 19. at 19, even 6 years.. meaning the other person is 25.. is a BIG difference in maturity and life experience.
@@caitlinkeating8177 well yes for a short time but they dated in 2010 jmaking her 20 and its pointing out the manipulation of her sayin shes 19 but if u have an issue with that what about a 19 year old dating a 16 year old? as taylor did when she was 19 what about a 31 year old with a 40 year old as john was 31 an jennifer was 40 or no problems with those? cause there would be if the rolls were reversed
I'm a retired therapist...and this is an excellent analysis.
i’m so glad u did this i was trying to decode this song and didn’t wanna do it alone. happy i got to do it with you.
❤❤❤
True true ,the only mistake here (and I actually love John for this, this debate has literally been going on for years ,which makes it look even more genius 😭) this song isn’t about Taylor swift 😂, he literally just announced publicly 15 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song was not written about Taylor swift ,I swear this man is an absolute genius for this 😂😆, he just saw the world burn in flames and swifties get triggered by their own ideas and assumptions 😭
btw for everyone who thinks this song is about Taylor swift (myself included) He just said (in his live radio station) it was not about Taylor swift 😆😂😭, I really wanted it to be about Taylor but apparently IT IS NOT about Taylor swift lmaooo ,I swear John is a GENIUS!! 😆😆😆
Your eye roll is epic lol. Taylor's people will have had her look at this for sure. Btw, are you familiar with the "Dear John" letter that numbers of servicemen received during WWII, informing them that their partners had found somebody else? And I don't recall anybody anywhere referencing an old country song by the same name.
THIS MAN GIVES ME A HEADACHE ON A WHOLE OTHER LEVEL
It just makes me angry that men get to treat women like this and it’s accepted but when a women speaks u she is called a bitch or slut for having an opinion or feeling about someone
I still can’t believe in 2022 it’s still accepted 😣
Just like men have feelings and opinions so do women!
I don’t think I want to hear his name again
It just upsets me too much and obviously he still has affected Taylor that it wakes her up in the middle of the night
So true, all of this!
Nailed it
This song is also a very simple melody and uses a nursery rhyme verse. I believe he’s calling her a baby, making fun of her.
I listen to this song cuz I was curious to his response, it only serve to cement my hate for him even more lol. To top it off I got introduced to him through “Dear John “ then I researched about him, definitely not the way you want someone new to find out about you. I’ve lived through abuse, I don’t listen to any of his music I don’t want any association to someone like him.
Truth
The undershirt line always reminded me of the lyrics in dear John “and you’ll add my name to your long list of traitors who don’t understand.”
Thanks Mere, loved this reaction ❤
❤❤❤
The man is a musical genius. I bet more than half of you John Mayer hating people have jammed out to a song of his more than once. Watching someone on UA-cam try and deep dive into a song you don't like doesn't make you a Dr. It just makes you a critic.
The funny thing is that he just publicly announced 20 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song was NOT written about Taylor swift 😂, so he literally just sat there for 11 years watching swifties scream and get triggered by their own assumptions, bro I swear this man is an absolute genius 😂😭
Yet taylor is a billionaire while bitter old John is .....in a nursing home?
I’m surprised no one (that I’ve seen comment 😊) has mentioned the 22 people in one being a jab at multiple personalities disorder, now known better as DID. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve seen narcissistic abuse where someone says something like that to insinuate a persons “level of crazy” by comparing them to a very serious mental health disorder.
I speak as someone with DID and it was hurtful for me to hear what he said in those lines because I feel like that a lot and there’s a lot of shame around dealing with the symptoms, especially when people like him add to the stigma of making fun of people who maybe ARE 22 girls in one - which I can only hope to be a part of the beautiful change in this world that allows people to identify as such and be unconditionally loved and supported
I know it’s hard to understand but it’s like having all these people with conflicting viewpoints/needs that literally most often contradict each other. Most often occurs with early childhood trauma because a person isn’t able to establish a sense of self. It’s rather logical actually.
I can only hope that wasn’t a secret struggle for Taylor and put on display as narcs tend to do to drag someone through the mud. Either way it’s so hurtful to see a good person like her suffer these jabs ❤️🩹
To end on a positive 🌈☀️
Lots of love to all who need it!💗💟♥️
Does he have an original thought? A lot of those words are hers. Ya know, maybe if he took all those quotes and made an album it might be successful.
And to belittle someone in claiming their feelings are nothing or overactive is the pure definition of narcissism. Shame on him.
I think it's possible he wrote Assassin ( from Battle Studies) about her also. The song is about him, the "assassin" meeting someone who also turned out to be an assassin. He's known to write songs about his exes, as is she.
that was written back in 08 before they ever met
Oooo I’ll check it out
Pleaseee!!!!!!! I'm dying for it
@@mendwithmere u can check it out but it was written in 08 has nothin to do with taylor
@@OnAeeir oh man, so close, but yet.. so far! thank you! I thought it came out in 2010, haha
I was a child at 19. They really should up the age of what is mentally and maturity wise. Who was really mature at 18 and 19 years old.
I know you’ve got a lot of requests lined up… but if you want to look at John’s side some more, there’s the song Half of My Heart, which Taylor was featured on? It gets somewhat psychological.
Hmmm I’ll put it on the list, I just don’t want to promote him any more
I always thought there was so much irony in that song, because the lyrics felt degrading to the person he’s talking about but she was featured in it. Like sometimes we miss all these things and at that age it makes sense. When you haven’t experienced a lot in regards to relationships, especially adult relationships, it makes sense that you don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into
more like “half of my age”
I really don’t think he’s admitting that he knowingly dated a “child”, but rather he thinks that she acted childishly in the relationship.
...except he was dating a child. She had the word TEEN in her age description.
If you think that because it was legal it was ok, please go ahead and stay away from children.
Why is no one talking about how he's referencing HUSH LITTLE BABY, DON'T SAY A WORD the entire song??? A NURSERY RHYME!
Taylor also used a line from Humpty Dumpty
Thoughtful, compassionate reaction and so inciteful. Thank you for your work on this. I know it will be so beneficial to many who truly need to hear this.
Have there been any studies as to what underlies the creation of a douchebag? Just curious. I feel a little bit sorry for this "man". Also, for being acclaimed as a brilliant songwriter, this is one of the most poorly composed songs I've ever heard. It sounds like a 10-year-old tried to write it... and failed.
In reference to the black chiffon - a black dress to me with signify a funeral. And since she broke up with Taylor Lautner in November 2009, the same time she started with Mayer. it seems that perhaps he wants her to “come out of mourning”. Just a thought.
Im a year late but I think the undershirt was a reference to the red scarf from Jake. Meaning she was saying that she affected Jake so badly that he kept her scarf. So since John affected her so badly, that she should have kept his undershirt. Insinuating that she never got over him, like Jake never got over her.
Is there anyone here that doesn’t think John Mayer is the worst person alive?? He’s done bad things but also, he’s become self aware over the years of his issues, I once seen him in an interview admit he is what he referred to as, a recovering ego addict. He’s not all that bad I swear lol he’s worked on himself
lol no
He’s not only a great human being ,He is also a genius bro ,he just announced like 20 minutes ago in his live radio station that this song wasn’t written about Taylor swift 😂😆, it’s funny to think that he has sat there for 11 years watching the world burn in flames ,and swifties getting triggered by their own assumptions 😭, this dude is a genius tbh 😂
@@miguel77077 due you're everywhere defending John, he's not gonna pick you
John has taken the steps to improve himself, while Taylor is still a raging super feminist.
I know this was kinda meant to be an off-the-cuff reaction video, and It's definitely clear that we're not offering therapy to the Johns of the world but the Taylors... but I'd be curious to see what, if anything, would be your professional advise to someone like this.
Say you have a client come in and this is their idea of giving their side of the story and it's as transparently an attempt to dodge and shift blame as this song is... what's the move? (Of course, there's also the option of just not taking them on as a client).
The way I was revolted when I heard this song. Like im a minor, and hearing this makes me so mad. He's not defending himself, he's just jabbing at others, why? because thats all he can do to defend himself cause somewhere deep down, he knows he is wrong, like that interview abt Dear John. He entirely blamed Taylor but it takes 2 to ruin a relationship. And I dont know why he's so mad. If you can talk about people's sex life with you the why can't they talk about how you're narcissitic in a relationship? And talking about your sex life which is supposed to be VERY PRIVATE INFORMATION makes me want to barf. Sure you can tell your friends and your family but the entire world? That experience is supposed to be private and safe. If the other person agree to do that with you means they trust you. You, Mr. John Mayor have broken that trust. And you expect people to stay quiet and then you write songs like "Paper Doll". Oh my god this just makes me feel so disgusting.
Imagine writing this song and then looking at what that "little paper doll" turns into.. how embarrassing for him.
Parts of this song honestly sounds just like hush little baby. Which nods at childhood and silencing her.
At 7 mins: yes EXACTLY!! Men are not trashed for their songs like women are.
Truth!
My 1st thought was that paper dolls are flat and 2 dimensional and that feels really gross if hes thinks of her like that. He is appalling. Absolutely disgusting.
I don't think that John Mayer means to call Taylor child by referring to her as a paper doll, rather I think he's trying to call her, flat, fake, and two-dimensional, just an image on paper. But it is revealing that this is his insult to Taylor. It shows that he does think of her as a child and likely targeted her because she was a child.
When he says "cut the cord" i took it to mean cut ties with her family, again... UGH he's the worst. Your awesome though! And so is Taylor
Fr so sad ,expect this song is not about Taylor swift 😂
@@miguel77077because John said so? Ofc he won't admit he's still bitter about this drama, that's why he was sending Taylor those long ass emails crying like a baby
Ugh. Same. I almost didn’t watch this because I didn’t want to hear his voice. I feel so grossed out.
It’s crazy that he’s so much older than her but he’s always been the one that acted like the child. As you said, she took blame for her part in it and he’s taken zero accountability even though he a grown man chose to have an adult relationship with a child. At least take responsibility for that.
Also I just know it kills him that she’s 100% a better song writer than him and there’s nothing he can do about it but cry about her writing a song about him. Seriously. Look at this song compared to Dear John and Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve. My 10 year old niece could’ve written a better song.
Also for all his words about her writing Dear John to hurt him he clearly wrote this to hurt her. And then once again she took responsibility for her part in this in Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve when she said she was living for the thrill of hitting him where it hurts. Even though we all know Taylor writes to process her feelings. She still admitted she was trying to hurt him at least by releasing Dear John. But he who is 13 years her senior will never admit that. Even in this song he released to hurt her he’s still pretending he was good to her.
Also I think when he says “Was it too far to fall for a paper doll” he’s implying that she’s fake and can’t handle anything real and that’s why she ran from him rather than anything he did. When in reality she ran because he is mentally and emotionally abusive. He wants her to believe that this is what love is. That the way he treated her was love. Which goes back to him saying he was good to her. I’m so glad she knew better. That she found real love.
She legit wrote every song about him younger than he was when he wrote this. This man child.
What really struck me about paper dolls is just how arse the lyrics are. Like, I expected a good song that is made contextually dodgy by the situation but its really just bad.
There's no coherent message or theming. He insults her for having no personality or autonomy beyond her looks, whilst also complaining that this girl with no autonomy didn't appreciate him enough but also she's actually a machiavellian schemer who uses men to portray herself like an angel? Like...John, she can't be devoid of personality and simultaneously evil.
Then there are all the references to her music which serve no purpose other than referencing her music. Why is she like specifically 22 girls? It's because she wrote a song called 22. What is the significance of the Moroccan red? Its because she has an album called red. Our of context, these lines are meaningless
Amazing video! I’d never listened to this song before, but when he wants her to “take this dress of gold and blue” I thought of gold medals and blue ribbons…. Kanyes not the only one claiming responsibility for her fame….even worse John wants her to believe he can do for her what her parents could never
It’s so gross
I'm not sure whether it's a violation of the Goldwater Rule or not for her to diagnose John Mayer as a narcissist but I AM HERE FOR IT.
this song doesnt even have a bridge? is this even a good song? thanks for your analysis!!
😂❤
This song genuinely sucked I listened to it for the first time the other day and I straight up out loud just blurted out that it sucked. Uggg he’s just a big creep.
😂😂😂😂
The jab about her weight is even sad bc TS has now said she has developed an ED. Not saying he knew that then but wouldn’t be surprised if he contributed
I was thinking black chiffon like what someone might wear to a funeral. Like, stop acting like I killed you...I was good to you.
He confessed to luring her out. "Paper doll, come try it on. Step out of your black chiffon"
Gold and Blue dress remind me of this optical illusion dress were some people see said dress in blue and others in gold? Well, maybe another way to discredit her feelings and what she experienced. Which can be seen as he isn´t acknowledging of his behavior at all. Who is surprised of this narrative?
This song came out waaaaay before that dress debate. So no, it’s not a reference to that
This is what he came up with, after calling Dear John "cheap songwriting"... What is this...???
And why cant ANYONE take this song seriously, he asks...
How on earth can someone take this seriously, when it just seems like a challenge of "how many Taylor Swift references can you fit in one song"...
Taylor was not the only one he manipulated. He did a number on Jessica Simpson, on and off with Jennifer Aniston and Katy Perry
Yeah and they all spoke up about it but they’re made to seem petty or vapid for even bringing it up 😭
The chapter in Jessica's book was one of the most abusive things I've read. I can't even imagine..... it's awful. I love the music but can't bring myself to go see him
John Player
YES!!!! I was getting JUST as frustrated and protective as well.
I really like how he tries to drag her for being a young girl still discovering herself and not being fully emotionally mature… like yeah John that is sorta why your relationship with her was so creepy. Everything about this song just highlights why 32 year old men shouldn’t date 19 year olds, and yet he can’t see how this is calling himself out even worse than any song Taylor wrote.
Yeah the recovering ego addict stuff was just…wow. I can’t believe Ronan Farrow could keep a straight face.
Lol! I know
Ronan deserves an Oscar for that💩
I associate black chiffon with a widowers veil. Like he's saying stop mourning there's nothing to cry about?
You should react to “ours” a love song that Taylor also wrote about John
The fact that you call yourself a therapist and act like this is very scary.
hope to never find a therapist like you
Love john mayer amazing artist ❤
His 2010 interview with Playboy tells you everything you didn't want to know about John Mayer. What an egotistical, despicable creep. I can't hear his music without thinking of it 🤮 Jessica Simpson decided to never have anything to to do with him after that.
He's admitting to being in control by calling her a paper doll... like it's so gross
he tried to say she's a child bu all he highlighted was the age gap. Great job John
True true ,expect this song isn’t about Taylor swift 😂 but go off ig
@@miguel77077 well the lyrics would lead anyone to think about her so I'd say it's pretty fair to think of it that way
@@Moonsong_ you can think of it however you want but that doesn’t mean it’s true lol, he just announced it’s not about her ,but yeah I mean ,one can think the sun is green
@@miguel77077 please, I’d like you to find, in my answer, a part where I say it’s confirmed that the song is about Taylor. I said it is most likely to be + it’s not like he can’t lie. The song seems to be about her so much that most of the listeners think it is, it’s hard to accept that an idol you like can do something bad, but you’ve got to get over it, it happened, he tried to sneak out of the situation and failed. However, I’m not saying it is in any way confirmed about her, but I would totally agree with anyone saying it is.
@@Moonsong_ well it’s not like Taylor can’t lie about eveything that happened because 99% of his ex’ think he’s not a bad person ,not to mention that Taylor’s best friends are best friends with John ☠️. But I never said you said that btw i just said that you implied that bc I literally said “John announced that the song is not about Taylor” but yall swifties will do anything to be right even when you’re wrong 😂, I just think it’s genius that John waited this long to tell us bc I really enjoyed seeing swifties scream and cry for no reason ,it’s embarrassing how yall idolize a person to the point where you treat her as a god ☠️, but it’s your life I can’t really do much about that ,but like I said in my first comment John said it was not about her but wtv helps you guys sleep at night ig
We all have room to grow
Yeah, cool.
Now, do you guys use the A triad or the A power chord in Last Train Home?
Triad definitely. It has more substance, which this video and analysis sorely lacks
It’s like you girls are so offended and for what?