Bert Kreischer Untold Tales, The Machine | EP 116 | Hawk vs Wolf
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- Опубліковано 9 вер 2023
- We embark on a journey with thee Albert Charles Kreischer III diving deep into his work on his latest feature film "THE MACHINE", his lack of (but persistent) skating ability, and his craziest stories in the comedy scene with many analogies along the way. (By many we mean MANY.)
Catch Bert on Tour! -- bertbertbert.com/tour
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Hawk vs Wolf is produced and shot by @malka_media . MALKA is a creative studio leveraging the instincts of a creative agency but built on the backbone of an agile production company. We are the makers. We don't just dream it, we create it; because we know how. This is content at the speed of culture. - Спорт
Low key loved how Jason checked Bert when he was overstepping, the weed and the ollie. Hahaha
Not a very good check Considering weed in “the 40s and 50s percent” doesn’t exist lol
Time stamp? Lol
I live for it. Thank god someone has the balls
Jason the only dude in the game who does that kinda shit I respect it a lot
It’s the absolute best. I love that he keeps him in his place.
Only Bert Kreischer can walk in a room with Hawk and Ellis and start explaining to them what Ollie-ing is like.
With a straight face
He’s so unfunny it hurts. He’s like someone’s alcoholic dad that won’t leave your house
Hahhahahaha this comment just made me spray scalding, hot coffee out of my nose
@@brettwilliams124he literally is... what do you mean "like"
It’s half half serious half leaning into the joke once his brain naturally walks down that path
Crazy how that 26 year old at the high school party bragging to sophomore girls he bought the beer is all grown up and famous now.
The dood is a kook.
That's an insult to Wooderson.
I honestly don't understand how. He's not a smart person.
Love seeing Tony "uncomfortable". I can't imagine the stories he doesn't tell and seeing him listen to Burnt is just fascinating. Then there's Ellis who's just egging Beer's wild stories the whole time 🤣
My heart goes out to Ellis mate, hope hes getting over the divorce well
Same
yes, that shits brutal and even more so with kids.
Don't worry there's plenty of D in the Sea 😅 he'll get over it
i didnt realize that
He had an open relationship. He was banging homos for years. He shouldn't be near kids
When Tony took off his shoe and Jason said "If you can't ollie in Tony Hawk's shoes you suck SO bad" I almost spit hot coffee through my nose! BWAAHAHAHAHA 🤣
Great to see Hawk & Wolf on the Bertcast this week.
i want the extra episode months from now of bert learning to ollie on tony's ramp
High probability it ends like Tim's lay-up.
@@tunelowplayslow5623or Tom’s
There’s NO way Bert’s gonna learn to Ollie on his ramp not to mention that’s a million dollar ramp and Tony probably doesn’t want Bert to put a hole in his ramp lol
@@versecontro4898 Bert isn’t gonna put a hole in that ramp anytime soon. Have you seen the clip of XL skater homie who basically shoulder checks the flat from the top rope trying to drop in? That ramp won that fight
Friggin' a, this made my day. Bert's Something's Burning with these guys is real good, too. I could listen to these three dude tell stories all day.
Bro I’m 3 minutes in and tony is saying “what is happening here” as Jason and Bart are talking about what skaters are generous lovers lmao this is gonna be a good one
Ellismate actually seems to curb Bret Chrysler's incessant interruptions.
This is the first Bart podcasts I've truly enjoyed in quite some time for that reason and I would love to see them do this more often.
So you've never liked bert on a podcast so you... listen to him on a podcast? They have other guests lmao.
Interesting g. Makes me kind of want to watch it . Otherwise I find Bert to be unbearable
I was thinking the Exact same thing! Good observation Brother! 🙂
The opening clip Bert is talking about himself and interrupting Jason. Are the editors memeing or is that the best clip they had? Haha
He's always talking about himself and interrupting everyone.
I laughed so hard when he was on Rogan's podcast, and Joe told him to shut up because Bert wouldn't let people talk.
Show just started off so ridiculous and tony looks so uncomfortable great stuff
The ollie convo that kicks off at 33:37 is absolute gold
😂😂😂 what about absolute idiot. A welcome board with skate trainers. Jason really shoulda beat him up in the parking lot for that
JASON TEARING DOWN BERT IS MY FAVORITE THING LMFAO
I love that Brent tried to explain to Jason Ellis and TONY HAWK what an Ollie is. 😂 This is Bruce in a nutshell. 😂
Bert's ollie analogies have me in tears lol 😂
Your chemistry together is amazing with Berty boy around! Loved this epi
No one likes Bert Kreischer more than Bert Kreischer likes Bert Kreischer!
He does a good job of acting like he likes himself. That’s why dude can’t be sober for more than 15 minutes.
I want out… I’m pulling the parachute. I want out!! 😂😂😂😂😂
Lol jason schooling Bert on weed is HILARIOUS. Smell the weed tony! 😂
@30:23 "yeah this is dirt weed" i'm fucking dead imagining that Bert has weed that legit smells like dirt and thinks its the best thing in the world and Jason is just like "nah, brah"
Dude that slayed me. Then called him a lightweight and said “you just got here” 😂
too bad jason is lying, there literally are no strains that are in the 40/50% range of thc... it doesnt exsist.
Bert is into himself for sure. Anything that has to do with him, in his opinion, is cool, good, worthy.
So a narcissistic pretentious C*nt….and NONE of it is warranted
I understand the hate towards him because of that, it grinds my gears sometimes. But it's still so funny .
He's a likeable obnoxious dude.
@@dani4everI can get people being annoyed by him, but I think he's funny with the right company, and with Tony and Jason can riff really good. He's also not mean or aggressive enough to merit actual hate, at his worst he's no worse than Jack Black. I love when the guys call him out of his BS though, the way he gets super defensive and Ellis just laughs will never not be amusing to me.
For sure. I just get annoyed with self absorbed people, but dude can be funny AF.
@@-Ricky_Spanish- Exactly, but I'm sure you've seen around too. There's a bunch of hate towards him, when the movie was about to come out it was in full force. To be fair, in part I think it was triggered by the way Bert was promoting his own movie like it was going to save cinema ahah He's delirious, but the fun kind.
You know it's brutal when birdman's staff is laughing in the background... FML this was hilarious
The funny episodes are always the best - Tony and Jason laughing with each other is gold.
Jason’s reaction to Ligma is the same reaction I have when I get got like that.
For all the attempted humour, nothing was funnier than Tony and Jason being told what an Ollie is. #morekooksplz
NEVER thought I'd see "Bert Kreischer" and " Untold stories" in the same sentence
Only Bert can be so delusional to compliment someone who was dealing with addiction and say they partied hard. Wild. Its Bart, what can you expect. I find him entertaining nowadays but kinda sad when you realize the reality. I wish him well though. Him and Tom still make a great duo.
im 50. 9 years ago I could heel flip Kick flip and ollie. I cant do these things now. After watching this I am ashamed to admit I need to learn again on carpet. Keep skating Thanks Bert.
Did it just become too much at 41? I’m curious as I’m 35 and have been thinking about getting a board for the first time in a good 15 years. Just to learn some light stuff and hopefully get my 7 y/o nephew into it.
@@louieo.blevinsmusic4197 I guess so. I also put on a lot of weight. Lost that weight over 2 years and back at a weight I was in my 20s just don’t have the enthusiasm for skating like I used to that’s probably the biggest factor.
Mark Hamill played the Cock Knocker in a Jay and Silent Bob movie. He was also the voice of the band manager on Metalocalypse. He's had some odd roles. He's not as straight laced as people think.
Brendon Small, the creator of Metalocalypse, voices the band manager ("Offdensen"); Hamill actually voices the guy that reports on the band's current exploits ("Stampington") to the group of villains on the show, as well as the leader of this group ("Salacia").
@@PaulMeranda That's right. Been a while since I watched the show. I remembered Hamill was in it, but got the wrong character. Good catch.
@@deadbeat-vc9kg ey thanks! they actually just released a film finale for the series that you might want to look into if you were a big fan at any point. all the best!
This could be the greatest episode in hawk wolf history
I really needed over an hour of laughs today s thank you!
Aye , any night time shift workers , first podcast of the night
Or any shift
@@kirkmbutterfieldeven the stick shift
This and the podcast with the guys from workaholics are my first two of the night.
Tony does not look like he’s having fun 😂
Because Tony is a genuinely good dude and zero “d bag” in him…clowns like Bert aren’t his people…go look at how Adam Sandler dealt with Bert….he destroyed him and it wasn’t a joke at all
Tony's having fun. He knew what he was getting into.
Can't wait to see how off the rails this one gets!
Less than 3 min and this is wayyyyy off the rails.
i dont believe bort has stopped drinking or lost weight
Yeah I would like to believe Brent but it’s hard to.
Just when I thought it was about over, the last five minutes had me dying laughing!
Almost at 100k guys. Been listening since the beginning, and have loved every episode.
Literally one of the best podcasts in awhile, this one and killtony what a great week
OMG I would LOVE to see a bloopers reel from the Machine.
Bert is such a gem! His daughters friend being so appreciative about the Metallica merch is so sweet!
I said you should have Bert on years ago! Worth the wait!!
Next week Bert’s going on Tyson’s Pod to tell him how to punch 😂😂😂
That was rad. Great episode. Kook of the year.
"If you can't ollie in Tony Hawks's shoes, you suck so bad!!!" I almost fell out of my chair! LMAO!!!
The group MIGOS 😂❤️
I love seeing Tony squirm when Bert starts being Brent lmfao
I love how when there's a guest who's like super wholesome with skateboarding passion etc, Tony seems to have a bit more of a lead in the conversation. But this episode is is Bert and Jason with Tony trying to dodge the fallout of getting cancelled.
This whole podcast I honestly couldn’t tell you who’s interviewing who 😂 bert always ends up flipping the roles
"I'm sober rn" suuuuuure Bert.. suuuure.
Whitethorn rose
Grown and bred by John Casali of huckleberry hill farms in southern humboldt county. A second generation Ganja farmer. Using his mothers 45 year old genetics to create some of the most unique medicine on this planet
We need Bert on The Dr. Greenthumb Show! 💪😂
THE MACHINE
When bernt said T Buns was 280 when he broke his body, I spit my drink
Oh my god! I was just watching the Bert cast from 8 years ago with Ellis.
The "ass and the pussy" analogy has TRULY changed my life for the better, thank you! LMAO
Tony wants off the ride! LOL
The fact that Tony is still beating himself up trying to land tricks is amazing. Way to go Gramps. Love y’all, great pod!
Here for the Hawk, stayed for the Wolf.
Another great one, I've been watching since episode 1.
DONT TELL HIM WWHAT OLLIE IS LIKE I AM DEADDDD
Great episode, boys. Thanks!
I normally can't stand bert because of his bullshit and him thinking he's this "Alpha", but I love that Tony and Ellis just have no time for his lies or bullshit and cut it out straight away. Real alphas do nothing alpha they're just chill and say it how it is.
That was weird, strange, uncomfortable, had a few odd moments and even some that made me think WTF… saw Jason and Tony feel all the same things lol. Bert is Bert, everytime!
I'm yelling Migos but yall don't listen 😂
Thanks y’all, I know that it wouldn’t make sense to have Leann on this podcast, but I would love to see Tony talk to her.
coke...when he says they partied alot, it was the 70s it was lots of coke lol love this episode!
3 entertainers sit down in a room. Someone smart turns a few cameras on. Legendary. ... Hawk gets bonus points for this one lol
Tom was not 280 when he had his injury. He had already lost so much weight by then.
Bert’s ability to get details wrong is amazing.
This is amazing 😂
Yo you gotta get Bert ollie-ing. As a comedy fan and lifelong skater, it's gonna be great. I love your guys' reactions LMAO.
The best one yet!
Hi ! Just wanted to thank everyone involved with this POD. Not this Bert Kreischer episode but the POD itself. I can listen to these two guys speaking to each other endlessly. Their friendship and genuine, humble attitude shines through and is very appreciated, especially from Tony Hawk who has been Skate royalty since the 80's. Really takes a special person to be this humble after accomplishing more than anyone in Skate history. In times of trouble I ask myself what Tony Hawk would do. After doing a couple of kickflips I can usually find my through the darkness. Anywho, thanks for everything and I hope you keep this thing going till the wheels come off (Rodney episode reference).
Another great show, Almost at 100k I'm always checking.
Is it just me or dose that black speaker looking thing in the corner look like a giant riser ? 😃🛹
Great episode!
3 mins in and Tony is pulling the rip chord. best episode
1:36 so funny...I found out about Bert cause of you Jason....your show on SiriusXM was my fav..was so upset when they took you off. But I was listening to the show with Bert...had no idea who he was and you were calling him out about wakeboarding lol!
love this pod so much. what a great guest!!!!
would love to see him on Jason's pod ;D
looking forward to this one
That was the coolest “neck-involved” movie scene I’ve seen since MacGruber was ripping throats.
I was laughing at the end
Jason wasn’t kidding
He needed to go potty lol
😂
Bert said, "Little Wayne." HEH!
I wish this was longer lol 🎉
Bert making Tony blush a lot.
"this is dirt weed" 😂
✌️❤️
Here for this even though I need to sleep cause it's 11pm ha
'....unlike your wakeboarding career!' 😂🤣💀
Love you guys.
"if you can't ollie in Tony hawk's shoes,...."🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I would love to see the old school ripper drop in on Tony's ramp. Straight to flat, hippie sandals flying through the air. Please make this happen.
Holy fuck. I haven't laughed this hard at a podcast in ages.
Is this dude really trying to say Mark Hamil who played Cock Knocker in Jay and Silent Bob had to be convinced to say curse words? Bert you're all cap bud.
100% would buy that shirt.
Jason, with the "It's only 32%", Absolutley pwned Brent Chrysler😂😂😂
We’ll anything legit over 32 will be moon rocks or infused and those are gross. Bert is a terpene chaser! Unique or rare terpenes are pretty great. Some people like different terps.
Nice save on the Lana r…del ray point haha
everybody burt's holdin
Poor ole Bert. Bless his heart. he can't help it. Bert needs Jason on speed dial to keep him in check.
Jason found the glasses. Those hit pretty hard, I gotta say...
Fuck yeah just found this pod will be the next one on my weekly watch list ahaha
With no winning or losing is the funniest tony has said😂 fuck yeah man
Tony seems like a really cool dude and the Best of All Time at skateboarding no doubt. He is in a league among Jordan, Tyson, Gretzky