Teens Waiting For Marriage: The True Love Waits Movement (Abstinence Documentary) | Real Stories
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- Опубліковано 8 січ 2021
- This documentary will examine the legacy of the controversial True Love Waits movement. Through personal stories and expert testimony, we will see how an evangelical teenage abstinence program made a surprising impact on the culture, encountered criticism, and ultimately refined its message to reach students in the 21st century.
[From 1995]
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I love how they put the emphasis on the girls to be pure, but the guys get a pass. What a fantastic culture to promote
It's because you think men and women are equal. We aren't. I know society wants to make us think we are. We aren't. Men do get a pass. Reality is sexist. Feminism has lied to the Western world.
Women are born with their sexual marketplace value and are best advised to preserve it. A high component of that value is purity.. Men must earn their SMV by being a provider. Is that fair?
Oppressing women….. guaranteed admission into Heaven. Obviously.
Cornerstone of any good religious practice.
That's the way of the world I'm afraid.
"Mama's baby, Papa's maybe"
And the papas of the past wanted to be sure.
But now we have DNA and science has proven that there is no way to tell
if a woman is a virgin or not
by a medical examination.
No matter,
to be sure the people of the books
will keep hammering away on the subject for the next thousand millennia until our sun burns out.
UNFORTUNATELY, you are correct. However, it takes two to tango.
Unfortunately that's the point 👉 societal control
Loved the kid who was like "nah, I can't do that". He knows it's some bullshit.
my man in the mall was trying to have a nice lunch with his family and someone starts coming up to him talking about teenage sexual relations..
I was thinking the same 😆 this moment was so akward, first when the young pastor thinks it's the daughter when it's the wife 😅 and then he keeps asking questions and trying to involve the man in the situation/debate...but you can clearly see he just wants to drink his coffee alone!
ya...awkward AF!! 😣
I want the follow up video. How are all these kids doing 25 years later?! How many of them got married and then got divorced. I would love to hear from them in the comments.
I'd be super interested in seeing that.
They're rioting the Capitol
All we know is that they are in their 40's
Also how many of them have ever satisfied their spouses.
@@StellaFl LOL. Yeah, it took me years of practice before I could even satisfy myself let alone someone else.
Having grown up in the evangelical circle, I genuinely can’t finish this doc. Not because of it being bad. It’s actually good. But because of what these kids have gone through. I’ve been there. I’ve thought that way. And it’s too hard for me to watch.
It's so devastating the damage that this does. It leaves people who have never even experienced anything sexual with sexual trauma because of the way it forces you to think about yourself, and people who have sexual trauma from abuse with even _more_ trauma because now they think they're disgusting for being abused.
I'm glad that you got away from all that, and I hope that life is better for you now that you've left the evangelical church.
So have I but my life 🧬 took a weird detour can't really explain it I am over that phase now
They called that 16 year old girl evil.. wtf
yep totally sick ..
Would love to hear from some of these folks in this video.. see how their life progressed..
Hey! I know people where it didn't go well but my husband and I and my best friend and her husband did very well with it. We are in a loving and commitment relationship. However, i will not pressure on my own children to do the same (like our parents did with us). What else would you like to know?
Obviously alot of these couples are not perfect. They messed up like other people. Which is normal. It's human nature.
What is progress in this world? Would love to see your answer.
@@annacbrown1986 Do you feel like you missed out on anything essential normal teenagers should experience
This frightening how creepy this is and they think it's spiritual. Some weird old guy asking your child if they are still virgins or 'pure' is REALLY disturbing.
fake
@@metoometoohere9691 You're fake.
Just because you're programmed the way the world sees virg-inity, it does not make the way these people think weird. It's not frightening. These are weak people making a commitment.
@@ibelongtojesus0316 I didn't say it was weird. I said it's disturbing the way these old men (acquaintances of these kids) are asking children if they are pure. There is nothing wrong with being a virgin. There is something creepy with the way it's pushed...
@@jharrington08able sorry if you think I was upfront with you, but that wasn't my intention. But I really don't think they were pushing it so much. It's just an elderly word of caution and it's not done in private but very publicly. It's questionable how some of those catholic priests do it.
It's tough watching this as someone who had this shoved down my throat. I don't know how many people whose lives were damaged because of this.
@Ryan Symons They'd be better off making their own informed choices, rather than blindly following a risky and harmful ideology.
This is why people are so messed up about their sexuality.
If I had a dollar for every time I caught myself saying out loud "Wow, that's creepy" throughout this video I could afford to pay for college fully, and still have enought left over to buy a car.
Virginity is the absolutely the last of your problems when trying to make a marriage work.
😂😂😂❣
True👍
But it should be the foundation of commitement
@@joshkaye5303 There’s other forms of commitment outside of virginity and abstinence but to each their own
Lmao
39:49-40:37 is why people leave the church. "you are probably going to get date raped"...how could you seriously say that to someone who has reached out for help?!
It’s insane how dated the ‘90s look
I know!!!!!
I think the 2000s looks worse
@no need to get aggressive I meant more like the quality of film! 90s fashion is back, scrunchies and mom jeans 👍
I was thinking the same thing!
When I was in high school I thought 80’s fashion was over the top and ridiculous but watching this makes me realize ours wasn’t that much better. 😬
@O S E K you mean sleeping around with multiple partners cut it? It never did. It only caused more harm than gain. Not that these ara super human.
That youth pastor is definitely on a list in an SBC office somewhere.
I grew up during the tail end of this movement, thinking that all men were evil and only wanted one thing out of me. I was taught that men were not to be fully trusted, ever, because they only ever had one thing on my mind. It really messed with my sense of self and I thought I wasn't worth anything because men weren't paying attention to me in that way. This video being reposted is important to document what this movement was like and what it looked like for young people having to deal with these ridiculous brainwashing tactics- and hopefully prevent this from having an upswing once again in our society.
Yes i agree with you. These kids are totally brainwashed. It's unbelievable.
Don't let anyone ever tell you who to love, or how to love. If there is a God, he wants you to love and be loved. End of.
lol the poor dude crushing on his step mom and sister. They did not have to ✨expose✨ him like that 😂
And this is reason I won’t be raising my daughter in the church b/c the bullshit I went through because I well developed young and treated like trash b/c people assumed things about me even though I was very immature and still played with Barbies until I was 13 at least. The parents treated me awfully because they were afraid I was going to corrupt their children when it was their children that were “bad”.
I'm sorry. Such stupid people out there.
I also am not raising my children in an organized religion. They know who God is and Jesus. We say our prayers . But none of this or sitting in a pew to listen to a man wearing gold tell us what is right or wrong
@@kristenc6839 Funny, I noticed all that gold too!
Girl same!
I feel you same thing happened to me
Tinder would’ve broken the 90’s.
34:30 - notice how that boy was blaming his step mother and step sister for the fact that HE was attracted to them
Wow if front hugging gives them temptation i can just imagine how fragile there minds are and starved they have become when it comes to anything sexual 🙄
I was 25 in 1995. Man, seems like a million years ago already.
Yes I was 21 and pregnant
@@tanzpenhalluriack3299 The eighties were still the most fun decade. I miss them.
I think you two were alive when the Loch Ness was still thriving. Literally walked with the Dinosaurs.
@@grumpycat6429 I knew Jesus when he was a baby.
@@Del-Canada
👄
👁 👁
These guys are acting like we did in 1st grade, when it would be 'gross' to have any contact in anyway with a girl. Bruh, even the front hug was too much for them lol.
This church no longer exists bc they had to sell the complex after the former pastor, Jerry Sutton was questioned about his expenditures. Things got ugly and the megachurch settled with the pastor then left to go teach at Liberty University, Jerry Falwell's University...the one who's son was just caught in scandal himself. The church is now owned by the Catholics who bought it in 2014. They renamed the church to The Fellowship of the 2 Rivers and updated their services at a different location. Membership went from nearly 7000 in 2007 and by the time they sold the church in 2014 they only had 575 worshipping at two older sites.
Omg the guy talking about lusting over his step mother and step sister! Wtf.
Lol where?
“What are you doing step bro! 😲”
That's disgusting 😂
Boy this brings back all kinds of "great" memories from my time in Youth Group.... This makes my skin crawl to watch! I'm not sure who is creepier the youth pastor or the radio host.... There is nothing healthy about this way of thinking and I'm so glad that I left all of this.
That pickup line scene in the mall was painful to watch.
I have committed so many sins with front hugging I guess lmaoooo
So sinful, you should be ashamed of yourself. I’ll pray for you.
@@steflyria damn 😔✌ I will go confess my sins
@@FlowerCarnival2021 in jebus name. Amen.
Bahahaha
LMAO 😂 Actually that was just for idiots with no respect.
I grew up with True Love Waits and signed some purity pledge at 14. Before I was 16, thankfully, I had deconstructed! My church promoted it, but we went to another church where we signed the pledges. It wasn't super-pushed on us and I'm grateful I managed to come out of purity culture relatively unscathed. No one was this creepy at my church.
8:22 My face during this whole doc
Grew up strict evangelical Lutheran we had some version of this but i was shunned at 16 when i came out. Found a new church
I don't know how these people turned out but wow! I feel especially bad for the girl on the radio that the guy yelled at, just horrible and banning music?! What's next burning all the books?
That’s happening now
@@fredbarnesjr.1044I was just about to say that
Thank you fo this episode of Real Stories
These fundies are such a trip.
The whole concept of your virginity and how keeping it makes you "pure" is such bs
AFTER WATCHING THIS DOCUMENTARY I JUST REALIZED I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION TO BECOME AN ATHEIST.
I've been a front-hugger for sometime now:)
So have I 😉
Something about those ring ceremonies creep me out.
Man this hurts to watch. If you want to be celibate that’s fine, but you don’t need these creepy freaks forcing this crap on you.
So I think If you watched this, you should watch Jesus Camp.
That is my hands down favorite documentary
I love that doc as well. It gave me bad flashbacks to childhood tho lmao
I seriously just watched that the other day. This was my face the whole time: 😲 then I had to google and see what those kids were up to. It was a ride.
Watching that next
There was something so familiar about watching this documentary. When I checked what year it was produced I remembered I had watched it when it was broadcast on TV here in Australia 25 years ago - “A blast from the past”.
Whoa
"If she was ugly, it wouldnt be hard right?"
Omg that was the one scene out of it all that made me so so so angry
*vomits
😂
Imagine thinking that being married 5 months is proof that waiting till marriage "works" lol
A marriage that is "working" is a marriage where the couple have a healthy relationship that they both are happy to be in. Simply being married isn't a "working" marriage.
Happiness is a vague term.
The fact that kids today wanna bring back 90’s fashion is crazy to me, I grew up in the 90’s and no thanks it needs to stay there 😂😂😂
Yeah, me too! Fashion is recycled too much.
I saw on Wendy that there’s scrunchies with matching masks!
Me too i was 14 in 95 and 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️..looking at the hair with those 2 little strands , or the big crunchy updo..lol..
😂😂😂 agreed!!
"God wants to lay his hand on some of you tonight" and "God can still use you" gives me shivers within modern context.
"This isnt a game , this decision is life or death.. and you can make that after these 15 min of commercial " dawson live radio we will back in a few!!"
😂🤣
These draconian law holy rollers are comical...this guy is Jimmy baker Junior 😯
Legend has it that dude's rose is still in the freezer.. ..
😂😂😂
This is so disturbing. Edited to add: I got alcohol commercials 😂🤣
More 90s content, please!
This is the stuff of nightmares
What’s the consequence of sin?
-death
Said with absolute conviction and leaving no room for circumstance and situation. Sad 😞
Freaked me right out. That's how most religions control their flocks, through fear and guilt. smh
Here's the actual verse: "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23
Well, it's not a lie....🤷
@@melissamolter6374 It's a collosal lie. Lol.
The Bible is the biggest crock of bull ever written.
Most girls don't like sports AT ALL!! And then the look on the girls face! LOL
A nice documentary
"Certain linguistic anthropologists think that religion is a language virus that rewrites pathways in the brain, dulls critical thinking." (Rust Cohle, True detective)
I feel so sorry for Jessica
This is a disturbing way to handel sexuality
That cheesy lil guy giving advice...lawdt.
Father putting the ring on his daughter where an engagement or wedding ring would go is weird.
There’s so much that is odd about this. I’m all for kids pledging purity if they want to, but the decision seems to come more out of fear. When the consequence response to sin is DEATH? seriously?
I’m at 20:21 in and I’m yet to really hear about purity as respect but rather them using guilt. And talking about other consequences other than hiv and the lots n lots n lots n lots n lots n lots n lots of diseases.
And those vows 🤨🤨😳 - cringe fest.
Lord give me strength that I hope this gets better.
The best way to support your child through this part of their life... start off the conversation as a pre teen. We had a very basic birds bees talk with our twin boys when they were 8. They asked cause they were doing baby animal studies in school. We were guided by their questions and we just asked them what they thought they knew then just corrected their info.
Age between 8-10yr they are old enough to understand basic body functions yet not quite at the gross and embarrassed factor yet if it’s just a factual discussion. Then age 10 they ask few more questions so we elaborated as far as they asked. We know they are comfortable in asking us questions.
They don’t know about periods but they will learn. Cause I’m not leaving it to their partner to teach them or give correct info like I had to twitch my hubby and his mates at age 21. They had no idea other than it was blood and it made us moody. So got out pad snd tampon and they had a look at it and asked how they used etc. I didn’t demonstrate obviously!
I remember doing this when I was like 15 years old! I lasted a whole 6 months 🤣 oops
43:00 THE GIRL HAS THE GUTS TO TELL THE BOY THAT SHE THINKS HE IS THE ONE FOR HER AND THE BOY IS LIKE....HE DOESNT FEEL THE SAME WAY. GODDAMIT! SO CREEPY!
How did this drop 2 weeks ago n filmed in the early 90s.. yall just pulling docs from the woodwork
The amount of brainwashing and ignorance in this video!!! Omg.
Ugh reminds me of my teenage years.
It's you who has been brainwashed.
What's brainwash about this? It's living life as God designed it. Unless you're your own god, then you can live according to your own terms. But remember you can't be the standard for others.
@@ibelongtojesus0316 god? Do you really think that god it's present?
You even belive that god has ever existed with all the bad that has happened in the world?
@@MartinGomez-kh8tc so you believe in the scientific impossibility of nothing creating something? How can you say and recognize all the bad happening around you? Why are all those things that you refer to as bad considered bad? What's your standard? Who is your standard?
Yes God not god. The Bible says the fool has said in his heart that there is no God. I guess God knew and knows people like you still are around breathing His air and living on His planet. Why don't you go and survivor somewhere else? I just wanted to know, what you are doing with all the bad your are doing to the world around you?
But while you're at it whether you like it or not, you need Jesus.
I can’t finish the doc because of how revolting this movement is and how it’s taken me till 32 years old to heal.
I don't miss the days of this bs being pushed on me. At all 😒
Same or being given pamphlets to bible (bridal) school. Thats pushed so much too.
🙌🏼me too
It still gets pushed on people, sadly, speaking from experience(except mine is more subtle).
22:05 “I pray that your honeymoon night will be an act of obedience”
What the actual f**k?!? 😧🤯
46:30 Also... don’t smash your cassettes and CDs! Do you how crazy expensive they were back in `95?? 💿
I threw up a lil' hearing that.
I actually had to replay that because I was like, nah, I must've misheard something here.
It just brought the creep level up by like 500%
My husband told me his parents used to smash his Eminem CDs
This guy doesn't have the right to talk to anyone like that. It's disgusting...
It's weird how this youth pastor keeps pointing out things about these young women's body parts like he is encouraging the young men to look at them that way.
this resembles a cult a little too much
Yeah kind of reminds me of those liberal cults where they all are just as braindead as these guys.
The pastor is giving me weird vibes
He is giving us all weird vibes
...In haunted attics
And true love lives
On lollipops and crisps 🎵
Wow couldn’t make it through the first 5 minutes. The cringe factor is unbelievable. So thankful that this is no longer the norm (where I’m from anyway) pure cultish behaviour throwing fear around to convince people that they were doing “gods work” or whatever. How anyone can justify that is beyond me.
This is crazy😢
I am so glad I am a freelance, independent woman who is a practicing witch. Purity culture is super harmful.
Ok..sOoo where are the women in these "talks with teens" ..are they hidden in the kitchen, baking shepherds pie, waiting for "pastor papa" to come waltzing through the door sayin' "we saved another 12 tonight mother"?..the FULL-ON PATERNALISM, arrogance & conceit fairly REEKS & OOZES
outta every moment here..makes me feel sick to my stomach & in my heart .. SAVE LIVES! ..end patriarchy. ❤ 🙏🏽
Must be very sheltered. What do they watch on TV and who are their role models?
It was a little different back then
There was a whole Evangelical subculture. We had our own music 🎵 celebrity preachers etc.
That youth pastor got game.
Creep is more like it 😂
Omg the bashing of the tapes no more guns .n roses or bonjovi sad 😢😭😢
There was even this crazy thing where they told us that some Christian music was secretly satanic.
44:54 Tongue piercing!!
6:49 this older man is far too interested in a 15 year old's virginity. How dare he ask her that and falsely equivocate virginity and purity.
What A sick society
..love how the Black youth are like, "what kinda crack are you on?!"..these poor Caucasian teens, they're gettin' so badly set up ..pray for 'em
I actually know more than a few black men who waited for the exact same reasons that I did..fear of getting someone pregnant ( if they were not ready) or contracting an STD . Not everyone who waits does it solely for religious reasons.
"And He said: Come to me, all ye braindead people"
Destroying that music... watching that hurt... Ughhh... *cassettes, so that tells ya it was probably really GOOD music at that!*
When you love someone, just do it. You'll love them more.
If you are not sure you love the person, you don't.
Move on. There are more than 7 billion people on Earth.
Yeah that's not good advice either. It's important to make sure that the other person doesn't have any sexually transmitted diseases before " just doing it".
@@UnashamedCaliforniagirl you have an immunity system..jeez...
No jk lol 😁😁
I wonder where they are now
Thank you for documentary, but it's so well done I now want to vomit. Ugh!
Makes 2 of us
😂 totally
@@StellaFlthree
Totally not a cult...
42:20 his arm seems so short
They all are nuts and messed up
He acted like there are a million sexually transmitted diseases. There’s like 7 bro. Desperate for a follow up.
Can anybody care to explain me what this is all about....?
Something about raping girls and controlling women again.
That's a really weird ceremony
34 minutes in....👀
.. ignorance on full display here ..& the level of unhealthy intervention from the adults is shocking..not to mention, using G:)d & religion in such a Spiritually abusive way .. Feel awful for these teens; pray they find Spiritually healthy mentorship, for the healthy expression of their innate, G:)d given sexuality ..if human beings weren't meant to express themselves sexually; which is to say in joyful, mutual, consensual ways together.. then guess what? G:)d in its infinite wisdom, wouldn't've given us the ability to do so ... this is so throughly f-ed up, on so many levels 🙏🏽 ❤
Please, more stories as to how unsatisfactory you are!
What is this.....1950's?
So the guy talks to groups and preaches in the mall? I get it since teens are in malls but it's so cringe. Let's get a pretzel, a new outfit and discuss virginity lol. BTW, not every marriage is true love. @@@ Did that minister at the ring ceremony say the honeymoon night will be about obedience? Sooo cringe!!!
Sick F&cking Creeps