What is Self-Esteem? | Eckhart Tolle Teachings
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- Опубліковано 4 жов 2024
- In this video, Eckhart discusses the uniquely human phenomenon of relating to oneself and the possibility of transcending a mind-made self-image.
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Having a low self-esteem simply means you have a story about yourself in your head that doesn’t show you in a positive way. Having a high self-esteem on the other hand is having a story or narrative about yourself in a positive way.
But spiritual enlightenment is about getting rid of the story completely. You are not a story or a narrative. The purity of what you are is beyond concepts; it is not what you think you are…
You identify as an enlightened person? ;)
Beautifully said
Amen we are much much more than 3D ideas or labels.We come from a source more perfect than we can imagine 🙏
Well said. I've always thought I needed high self esteem. But the better goal is to achieve no self esteem. "No self" as Buddhism teaches. Loving myself requires two separate selves like Tolle explains. That just adds unnecessary complexity and thus more thought and more ego. No need for that. I simply am. The bird or flower doesn't need to love itself. It just is.
Exactly as I saw it too
"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." -- Buddha
Wise words brother ❤️
The only thing that is appearing to stop you from enlightenment/self-realization/eternal life/knowing yourself to be unconditional love is identification with thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions and experiences instead of being aware of being aware and knowing yourself to be that unconditional love pure consciousness in which all thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions and experiences appear but are not inherently one with you; they are an expression of unconditional love; you are that infinite that is expressing itself as suffering/pleasure but inherently you are neither; you are that nothing/unconditional love/pure consciousness in which they are appear and by which they are perceived;
Suffering/pleasure comes and goes; there is an awareness that is aware of them coming and going; that you are; remember and know what you are; never identify with anything that is appearing within you; since it appears within you; it can't be you; you are that in which it appears. When you abide as that in which it appears instead of identifying; nothing has a grip on you; if anything comes; it quickly goes; like clouds passing; only if you identify as a cloud then it will appear as if the cloud is here for longer than it is originally supposed to; if you simply rest as the awareness and do not identify; it will quickly dissolve; be unconditional love by being aware of being aware; this is the highest; this is what you are seeking in absolutely everything else; you are seeking yourself; you are seeking unconditional love; but you are looking outside of yourself; instead of being aware that you already are unconditional love. Love love
How can I gain more self-esteem...what do I need to do? I am going through a break up and a loss of my daughter and beating myself up to the point where I have lost a part of myself
@@YaTut169 that is well stated
@@livenow13 maybe you can try to express all your feelings and emotions with acceptance, maybe through sounds, and realeasing any judgements or denials about the situation and how you feel and what you think
Oh what a relief to be out of the SELF trap.
From hating myself and wanting nothing more than to go to sleep and never wake up, (because I was sooooooo tired of living with my $#@! self each and every day), to perpetual peace, just living in the present moment however it presents itself. No more listening to annoying mind babble. I LOVE LIFE now! Thank you, Eckhart, for sharing what you've discovered. :)
And you're so good at teaching it!
How, and how long did it take you?
@@liamc7097 Well, a long story made short would be; In June of 2019 I was "trying one last time", starting a new life back where I grew up. No real hope since I'd "restarted my life" several times before at that point. (57 years of life). But I got lucky when I found a therapy package called Overcoming Social Anxiety Disorder: Step by Step by Dr. Thomas A. Richards. Maybe I didn't have Social Anxiety Disorder but I sure did have ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts (and emotions)). I learned how to slow my mind down, how to identify, and eventually stop, ANTs. And let go of my negative past. Maybe 4 months into that I learned about Eckhart Tolle and his teachings. I found his book The Power of Now. I can't say, because I don't recall, when exactly I WOKE UP and realized THIS IS IT, but I would say I was listening to Eckhart's teachings for at least five months. And it was only ever a whole lot of useless 'concepts' before that. Like Robin Williams' quote, "Reality, what a concept".
So long as you're getting your identity from your mind, your life will remain a concept. A kind of dream. Usually not a good dream. lol.
PS; Having learned about good health, The Proper Human Diet, probably helped a lot. Mark Sisson, Dr. Ken Berry, Dr. Sten Ekberg and others.
Good luck! I wish you good health and eternal peace. ;)
@@EnlightenedCarnivore hi John, I'm glad you've gone through this change! I'm glad that you're feeling better. Happy for you man. I find myself in a situation where low self-esteem is plaguing my existence. There are quite strong negative thoughts that pop up for me. Stuff like "there's something wrong with you", "you don't add any value to anyone's life" etc. At times I feel like it's hard to disassociate from the thoughts. I don't wanna live like this anymore as well. Really just don't want to care about the thoughts. But I'm not quite sure how to gain power over them
@@theChannel40 Hey, Amigo..Thanks for your reply. Wow, I wrote that comment 6 months ago and, guess what,...life has become better and better since then. And in ways I could never have imagined. So no worries, there will come a time you'll be glad you've suffered because it was your ticket out of "normal" existance.
I didn't mention it in that comment but, I never would have understood any of Eckhart's teachings if it wasn't for having 80% of the garbage removed from my mind first when I went through 14 months of CBT (Cognitave Behavioral Therapy) by way of this guy, Dr. Thomas A. Richards, Overcoming Social Anxiety, step by Step. A series of 20 audio cassettes. I think the best way to explain it is that this guy's teachings provided the foundation for me to begin to understand pretty much everything I've learned afterwards (and during, since the therapy starts working almost right away). It teaches you how to disassociate yourself from those negative thoughts. (ANTs, Automatic Negative Thoughts), release yourself from negativity from the past, live in the present moment. All sorts of good stuff. Check it out, you'll love it!
I could throw some other names your way, other people who have helped, but I'm thinking start from there and see what happens. ;)
@@EnlightenedCarnivore @John Vreden Hey man, good to hear from you! This gives me hope! I'm actually training to be a therapist so definitely should be looking into CBT as it's probably something I'll be working with. You mentioned audio cassettes, do you mean audio book? I can only seem to find the book. From my experience so far, there's always an opportunity for growth when going through hardships. I might not see it now, but I have to trust that there is light on the other side of the tunnel
Be the person you would want to live with and love for the rest your life.
No
Well said!
I am blown away by the way you put into words what you want to say. It is like a poetry with amazing rhyme.
Its got to be divine intervention. Its flawless. ♥️🙏
He speaks from Being, the Truth.
Yeah😭
I need an Eckart Tolle in my mind, 24h/7day until my last day in this dimension. 🙏🏻.
Thank you Eckhart🙏 These videos are a gift to humanity
Eckhart is a gift to humanity. I truly love this man.
When you know your not who you think you are, you don’t have to live up to anything or anyone but your true self, Being.
I feel like I don't know my true self I feel lost. What can I do to find my true self?
@@karenmartinez8781 Follow Eckharts’ Teaching to the letter, through understanding and practice you will find your essence, Being
@@herzcompass1293 thank you but what are the few things?
@@karenmartinez8781 The best part is that you don't "need" to find your true self. What I've learned from Eckhart's teachings is that the minute you try to seek something out, you are looking for form. Your true self is not form or anything that can be conceptualized, but right within you. Your Being is who you are, whenever you go deeper into yourself you will discover you have been you all along. It's as simple as that, don't let the ego overcomplicate it. Hope this helped :) This is just my opinion of course
I almost daily ask myself who I really am...🤔
May your day be filled with joy peace love and abundance ❤❤thank yoy eckhart
“In the eyes of the ego, self-esteem and humility are contradictory. In truth, they are one and the same.” - A New Earth
Brilliant
Yes! This is one of my struggles! I could never conciliate this two. I now see they are both ego. Thank you for sharing.🙏
Will you plz mention the page?
@@humancumalienhumancumalien3947 page 109 - chapter "giving up role playing" :)
@@Rita-sp7hh thank you.
"In form, you are and will always be inferior to some, superior to others. In essence, you are neither inferior or superior to any one. True self-esteem and true humility arise out of that realization. In the eyes of the ego, self esteem and humility are contradictory. In truth, they are one and the same".
Last two lines of page 109 concluding the topic, if are read in isolation from previous four lines same may create ambiguity about the crux of the thought shared by Eckhart. If all six lines are read together, no room is left for any ambiguities.
Your book " The Power of Now " is one of the greatest books that I have ever read in my life , It really changed the way I think .. Thank you very much for this great knowledge .
I have just received that book from Amazon and can't wait to read it!
@@angiemcdonald4248
Its an amazing book .. Have a nice time reading it
Thank you Hayder.
Have you read The New Earth yet? If not, you are going to love it.
@@xoxo00009
I'm going to read it soon , Its the next book in my list .. Thanks
Self-esteem comes automatically when you learn to love yourself. How do you love yourself? You take RESPONSIBILITY for your life. What is my life? Responsibility for healing one's mental, emotional and physical process.
Tolle is saying though that the ultimate goal is to go beyond self love and self esteem. Having high self esteem or "self love" indicates the ego is still creating a story about you, but this time the story is seemingly more favorable. In reality, I don't have a life. I am life. I do not have a "self." I do not love "myself." I am love. The bird or flower does not love itself or hate itself. It just is. That's good enough. That's where we need to move toward. No self.
I feel so privileged to be at the point now where I can watch thought. Thank you Eckhart 🙏
It's all about addiction to thinking. Suffering, blame...
comparison to others. Loving & thought. Listening to Eckhart makes it seem so simple. It is.
Self-knowledge is one of the 13 great practices of the New Message.
Through Self Knowledge, students of the New Message cultivate a high degree of honesty and awareness about our states of mind and life condition. We seek always to know the content and state of our mind and the condition of our body so that we can be capable and ready to participate in the world.
Study: Steps to Knowledge - The Book of Inner Knowing, by Marshall Vian Summers
Thank you, E K.
This was uploaded just as I was searching for books online about self esteem! Haha! Great synchronicity there...
Now you don't need to read any of them. 🙂
Danke Herr Tolle! Auch dafür, daß Sie diese Videos gerade jetzt veröffentlichen!
Having a balanced self esteem is a great thing to live our lives happily without torturing ourselves with negative thoughts all the time!!self esteem gives us courage,power,to grow together with life!!
sofia goudaropoulou, Even better is to be rid of THAT "self" altogether. ;)
I love you eckhart❤ thank you for sharing your presence and wisdom. It has shown me to fully embody, experience and know my own presence as well🙏🏻
You're a blessing to this world. And yes, so are you - whoever's reading this🥰
Your humour is so refreshing...especially when I feel the intensity of myself listening to your pearls of wisdom..and then you help me relax & really understand your message so well...thank you! !
This video blessed me infinitely.
Thank God for Eckhart Tolle
Every time I'm grateful for Eckhart , I wish I'd found him years ago but I know that now is now and that's a ton of mind evaporated.
His posture and gesture in this video equally are very expressive if one really is willing to understand the illusory trap named self-esteem.
Thank you Eckhart for all 💞💞💞
Love this, Mr Tolle!!!
I find that whenever "WE" - me and I - have a negative moment or experience, just affirming the Universe (Source, God, Allah or the Creator, etc) brings me back instantly to the Now, the present moment, my true self.
As a Muslim, just saying: Alhamdulillah (All praise and gratitude is due to God) ; Subhanallah (Glory to God) ; Allahu akbar (God is greater) ; La ila ha illallah (There is none worthy of worship but God) brings me back into a state of love, for myself and all creation.
These affirmations are taught to Muslim children from a very young age, and they are meant to bring tranquility, make you mindful, positive and live life with humility and love for all creation, including yourself.
indeed Eckhart's videos are a great gift ! Many many thanks🙏 🙏 🙏
Thank you so much for these lessons, I hope to maintain a healthy ego/self-esteem.... not too much or too little. It's awesome to know these lessons because my bipolar mood swings cause lots of highs n lows. I now know I'm not those thoughts/emotions so there's a steady baseline of well-being behind the outter self. Have a great week dear readers!!!
I found this very insightful and recognised that I was once the ego driven person that Eckhart describes. 🙏
Dear Eckhart Tolle, you are illuminating my days, again and again. Thank you with all my heart!
Thank you Presence gave me peace in all aspects in my life
You're welcome
These videos are a blessing, as are Eckhart’s books. ‘The Power of Now’ is an incredibly powerful book, and it transformed me utterly. So much wisdom and truth inside those pages.
I never understood "self esteem" or "self confidence". To "love yourself" is perhaps one of the strangest ones here because it implies projecting the love that you already feel, outward, to an illusory version of yourself, when the love is already where you want it to be!
Am grateful to you and your clear teaching technics of how life should be in our innermost being.
Thank you 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
🙏
You've always been so funny and lighthearted 🙂...just made me realize looking at this old vid Eckhart... God must love fun.
Thankyou for giving Eckhart, I am very grateful to you❤🌼
Thank you for posting 🙏🏾
*You ARE enough!* 🙏
(Simple, but SUPER true!) 😉
You Are😊
No no no, YOU are ^^
This guy is a saint.
This must be the wisest man I have ever come across
Thought provoking analogy, thanks for sharing your insights with us, much love + appreciation for all your truthful practical teaching. Namaste ❤️
Reality and experience are fluid they are part of the pendulum of life .. it swings both ways constantly
Very nice explanation, thank you! The common problems just dissolve together with the self =)
From the view of beingness or consciousness, self esteem is like a mind-made phantom in the body (mind). Actually self esteem doesn't exist at all nor would it be needed for a fulfilled life.
@@herzcompass1293 Many thanks for your reply, much appreciated. I fully agree with your representation of some earthly manifestations such as emotions, bodies, thoughts, etc. However, we're only talking about „self-esteem“, which is - in my humble understanding - created by the ego.
My view - there are no other words to say it earthly - is NOT a completely different level of being as you stated. It’s God or pure consciousness from where all forms get manifested. That is it.
Do you remember when this talk was up on UA-cam in its entirety?
Pepperidge farm remembers.
Still is
@@connieanderson2281 Really? I can't find it
WOW! What a beautiful and profound video! So inspiring
Deep explanation about self esteem.
@Eckhart Tolle I love these videos. I would love for the dates to be included in the description
Thank you.
Thank you 🙏💖💖💖
Thank you
Very interesting and enjoyable. Love and light to you!
Thank ypu
Thank you eckhart for this video. It popped up just when I needed it :)
Gratitude 🦆🦆🦆💗💗💗🙏🙏🙏
Perfect timing for me
Hello, I have two requests to make, please:
1) Is it possible to put the music volume much lower than Eckhart voice, please?
2) And is it possible to not kind of distorce the voice like if we were listen a robot or something like that?
I would apreciate but don't know most people opinion, of course.
Above all, thank you so much for this meditations!
🙏🙏🙏🙏thank you ,thank you ,thank you
How can I gain more self-esteem...what do I need to do? I am going through a break up and a loss of my daughter and beating myself up to the point where I have lost a part of myself
are you beating yrsel up or building yrself up?(louise Hay made this quote) As eckhardt was telling, are you yr worst frien or yr best friend(when you are suffering just imagine what a good friend would tell you and write down the words. the words you are telling yrself create the image you have(self esteem) if you enjoy beating yourself up you are having yr worst friend living with you inside yr head and you should throw him out. I do believe that we are attracting what we are thinking about ourselves and the unworthyness is attracting these experiences so it is time to change the beliefs(the story) to attract better experiences(we are only here to experience situations to make us grow and evolve and life is only a play like a hollywood movie, but we take it for real. Entering our higher stat of awareness(not the ego which is only a made up character for yr movie but not yr real self that is always there and doesn't change, this is the goal and why we need to suffer to leave the movie which we take for real)
Namaste thankyou Thankyou Thankyou
I love this man!
You have explained it very well here. I felt left hanging at the end cuz the video did not talk what self-esteem should be. It told us what it should not be. Can you share that?
Eckhart and Sadhguru agree on so much, too bad they haven’t collaborated
Except on the present moment thing which i still do not understand about Sadhguru's viewpoint🤔
@@xoxo00009 they do agree on the present moment thing. Sadhguru just doesn’t like the common misinterpretation of Eckhart’s teachings, that the mind is the enemy. They agree that life is in presence and that the mind should be used as a tool.
Thank you~ ✨☀️✨
Thank you for explaining
This is the truth!🙏
Thanks Eckhart 🙏
Thank you very much, for the interesting Video .🙏❤️🧚🏾
Great wisdom, Thank you
Thank you!
He didn’t really finish explaining why self-love or self-appreciation is bad/the wrong way to go. I get not clinging or overly identifying with thought, but without love for ourselves, or perhaps without embodying love (another way to put it, but that still has “body” in it), it’s a known fact we cannot love another. And as humans, we yearn for love above everything else. I’d love if he explained that more.
Couldn’t agree more!!
What I got from it: if you entertain 'self love' you will unwillingly also entertain 'self hate' because that is how the ego operates, it compares you to others to attain it's 'level'. But he did say that by not entertaining either, you stop feeding the ego (the source of all suffering) and attain true balance, by fully accepting yourself there is no need for self esteem/ego as you are comfortable in your own body.
Maybe that answer will come when your ego disappears. Without ego, love and acceptance is all there is.
@@catiarodrigues8492 hm…so by your logic, if love and acceptance is all that’s left, I could apply some of that towards all of myself, no? And I’m still fitting within what you outlined? I’m going to elaborate on what I mean in my reply below…
@@Storm_. thanks for your reply! While I understand that idea, it still feels like, for the majority of people in our society, this approach is skipping an essential step. I feel this way about zen spirituality, too, which Tolle seems to align with in his views. The approach looks great on paper, but in reality, I feel the following is true:
In order to *let something go*, you must first *hold it.* understand it fully, grasp it. Only then can you truly release it.
Because let’s be honest, most of us have a disordered relationship with ourselves as a result of our ego (which is often worsened by past pain & unprocessed childhood trauma, among other factors.) That’s why we’re looking for a solution, a way to get out of the state of sadness or suffering, right?
Generally, we know the ego’s main goal is to protect us, but it often goes overboard, reminding us that if we try anything new or different, there’s an inherent risk, and we “could die.” That’s the core fear, deep down.
So there’s a use of fear (the opposite force to love) by the ego to keep us still, inert. It leads to stagnation, prevents us from doing anything that might mean the loss of acceptance by society, our friends, our family, the media, our culture, etc. All those opinions contribute to what the ego tells us we “must do to survive.” And it fiercely defends this.
So I’m wondering, how does one go from a lifetime of the feelings of self-loathing, self-criticism, or self-suppression by the ego…to suddenly saying one day, “you know what? The ego doesn’t exist. So I’m done with all that.”
Really? 🧐 I’m sorry, but I think that is easy to write, FAR more difficult to execute, and not all of us have the kind of stark awakening that Tolle did.
I’m not saying it’s impossible. But I agree with the last commenter. We live in a conscious, physical world. While we have a subconscious and unconscious aspect, the physical experience needs to be addressed. And to be present means that, from time to time, the ego will crop up. Are we really saying that we’ll hear it in our mind & simply say “you don’t exist” every time, in hopes it just…goes away and never comes back again?
I’m suggesting the balance of first acknowledging the ego, and beginning by saying “thank you for trying to protect me. I know you mean well. But you’re coming from a place of fear/lack, assuming the worst, basing all your thoughts only on previously collected data, and we’re going to be okay if I do this thing you’re telling me not to do.”
This, to me, (combined with a daily meditation practice, aka practicing Tolle’s suggested presence) has been a far more practical approach to getting a handle on my own perfectionist, over-critical ego.
And the more I acknowledge its good intentions while still doing what my heart/intuition tells me, the quieter the inner voice gets over time. This is especially helpful in times of emotional distress, when the inner voice can be the cruelest. Pretending it’s not there isn’t helpful, because the emotions are sometimes overwhelming. And saying “I shouldn’t feel this way” or invalidating the experience in the moment by saying it’s only a result of my “made-up ego” hasn’t ever gotten me to feel peace. Being kind to myself has helped tremendously, which could be seen as treating myself like I would a friend, or self-accepting, or loving my self. All of these are somewhat synonymous, and none of them are about self-comparison. And if the ego does go away fully someday, I won’t be upset! 😁
But I don’t see how self-acceptance would force it to remain. That’s been my path to seeing my authentic self (beyond the confines of the mind/ego/pain body), and on a deeper level, with this approach, I find I’m slowly reconnecting with my soul.
If you got this far, thanks for reading & considering! ☺️🤍
Loved this, thank you!
Thank you 🙏
Thanks Master
That's the mind getting in its own way when assuming other species aren't aware of themselves.
needed this ♥️
Honestly don't mean to be a downer. I have read Eckhart Tolle's work and found it extremely enlightening, but I feel that he strawmans self esteem a bit here. For example, I don't think that psychologists, psychiatrists and other proponents of self esteem deny the separateness of the self. They don't deny it's volatility and the impact of external influence. They do not even claim that beliefs, values and attitudes (the self) are fixed and unchangeable...quite the opposite. Nor do they advocate affirmations and visualisations as a 'fix all' cure and explanation for good self esteem. From my understanding, advocates of good self esteem propose behaviour and thinking that congruent with one's feelings (i.e. what feels right)...the unthinking. It is not simply superficial, externally gleaned goals as Tolle is making out here. Self esteem is still about being true to the non-self and the internal world. From my understanding they generally promote reliable systems, habits, methods of managing it...that are consistent to the individual even when times are hard.
I would have loved to have seen Tolle reference (and respond to) the Maslow hierachy of needs here. How would he explain love and belonging as a core human need in self esteem? Is he claiming that this is wrong...and that people do not need this? This is where I struggle with Tolle and reluctantly feel myself thinking that he is able to feel this and say these things given his very specific life situation. Does Tolle go to dinner parties? Socialise with friends? I would like to see how he does this. Would he still be saying these things if he had not achieved the success that he has achieved?
love you love you love you
GRAZIE 💙
Wonderful
gold
Echart I love You :)
Most others can't parallel park either, feeling better about myself 😂
I'm not sure he answered the original question?
Appreciate this is years old but can anyone share an opinion on what happens when you reach the stage of true self, detatch from the mind-made sense of self but then find yourself in a society where everyone and everything is based around the ego. How do you live day to day in an environment like that where all your interactions are with people consumed by ego?
Evergreen Eckhart🌝
As Sadhguru put it, "When there is no more "self", where's the need for "self esteem"?
When there is no disease is medicine needed or is health a special goal to be attained?
Good dali quote
If a person doesn’t love himself, not in a egotistical way, how can he love someone, this beautiful world? If he is “empty” inside, he is ought to be empty outside too!
check out Will Storr's book 'Selfie'
Whoever is reading this
May all your dreams come true 🤗
While watching this I heard the door slam. It was my Ego!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
very nice...😍😍
I have a coffee mug that says "Love Yourself".....😂😃😄😅
Luv u ❤❤❤❤❤
Does anyone know what music it is that is played at the end? Its beautiful!!
Self-esteem: the result of the stories you tell yourself. Stop telling yourself the stories. No stories, no problem.
Question, wouldn't animals feel a certain place on heirarchy though? Don't these natural urges tie in to self esteem? Dominance plays itself out in nature - strongest of animals have highest esteem? Or no?
I love you
Please stop cutting out the little pauses of his speeches :)
Subtítulos en español. Gracias
Think the point is being selfless, no ego to esteem. My mind has no image of me, it never has. Here comes the twist, its because
I dont exist.🦋
(Urban spaceman)