Humvees - Campfire Stories
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- Опубліковано 8 вер 2024
- Not all Humvees are built equally.
🔥 / mikeburnfire
👾 / mikeburnfire
👾 / zach_hazard
Nonstop - Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
creativecommons...
"Where's Hazard? Where's Hazard!?" *The horror sets in that EVERY recruit slammed their barrel in the door on the way out of their rooms and they need someone to fix that.*
*recruit brings their M16 to Zach* “I thlammed my barrel in the barrackth door”
Even Worse. Mortars are basically Small Arms. "Someone Get Hazard to Make the Mortars Stop"
The recruit just brings back the M16 which is just a U bend shape
@@AmphiStuG You forgot the "Highthpeed".
@@averagepersonfrommissouri751 oh god. who did the Rookie come across? Black Adam? lol
Zach going to war in Iraq: This is mostly hot and boring, but there were a few good times.
Zach stationed 'safely' at Fort Polk: If any god, force of nature or higher power in this forsaken universe can hear me, please end my misery.
Boredom is the real killer
I mean, at Fort Polk he had no option of dying in his sleep, so, pretty much understandable.
I've been to Polk, I can sympathize with this
"I didn't get PTSD from combat, I got PTSD from Fort Polk." I think was a line he said.
@@ScreachHiensburg "I didn't get PTSD from being in Iraq, i got PTSD from being at Fort Polk" is how he worded it.
"Let me die in my sleep, jackass" might be the most 'Zach' thing Zach has ever said
"I lived lazily I will goddamn DIE lazily!"
Legend
I concur.
Zach embodies the energy of griff from rvb
Grif
The Pitcher's name was Randy Johnson. He went on to become a photographer currently contracted by the NFL. His company's logo is a cartoon dead bird.
😂 Thank you
So he did want to be known for that!
... for the NFL? You'd think the MLB would want to keep the guy around even if he's just takin' pictures. Guess the NFL pays better.
If you can't live down a reputation, just lean harder into it I guess.
He also worked as Rush's tour photographer. As far as pitching goes, he has multiple cy young awards, a world series ring, and a perfect game. The dead bird is not all he's known for
I can just see this exchange happening for the Kevlar burrito thing
Platoon Sergeant: Where's Hazard?
Squad Leader: That fucker made a Kevlar sleeping bag and put his helmet on
Platoon Sergeant: Clever
Why didn't the base adopt that idea? It's the perfect solution and a million times more effective than whatever they did.
@@DeHerg Because it takes 10-20 years for the US military to adopt anything that comes even close to being a good idea.
@@elijahgrimm8052 10-20 years? you say that like they would ever adopt something that doesnt make the soldiers live worse lives
@@igunn8632 the only thing the military adopts are new recruits.
@@DeHerg I expect the actual answer is that they didn't have enough kevlar blankets laying around for the whole base.
A Kevlar blanket is basically a weighed blanket, just with added +20 bonus points to defense as well as comfort.
Perfect! I'll take 20 of them! I love my "lead blankies" as I like to call em, cuz it feels like you're wearing a blanket that has these little pockets of fuckin lead or whatever because of the dense pellets in them.
I play a lot of Darkest Dungeon, so this feels like their good/bad stat effects.
"-20 stress and prevents 'Insomnia' when camping, possibly can invoke 'Claustrophobia' in its place, increases chance of night ambush."
@@Nickel_The_Wise lol
@@airplanemaniacgaming7877 They're often glass beads as I garner.
the story really read like he's under a dyi kotatsu
I'll one up you Zack. During university, I knew I had problems respecting my alarm clock, so I had to hide it from sub-conscious me. I'd hide it in a box, or on top of the wardrobe, or anywhere that you'd think would need a conscious brain to find.
So one morning, I woke up late, wondered why my alarm didn't go off, only to find that it neatly disassembled on my desk, battery, case, clock, all laid out. In front of my wardrobe was a chair which sleeping me had used to retrieve the errant time-keeper.
This was when I learnt, that sleeping me was a dick that didn't care for my academic career.
HAHAHAHAH
Sleeping you said “NO ALARM CLOCKS” and meant it
I can't compare to that, but Sleepy Cymond is a lying jerk who will tell you whatever you want to hear, just so he can go back to sleep.
Screws and all?
@@Bruh-lq7ev Sleeping me was not that kind, no it was a fairly cheap clock so half the case came off without needing tools, the face was pulled out (I assume) through the back, and the clear plastic cover probably fell out when that happened. What really got to me was that it was all laid out neatly on the desk, in a row, as if daring me to put it back together. Or maybe sleeping me thought he was being helpful for when I had to fix it.
I didn't, I had to get a new one, and bought a spare just in case.
Thinking back on it that was pretty wasteful, I'm sure the engineering lab would have lent me a soldering iron to fix the wires.
I love that they just left Zach there in his little kevlar grief cave.
They were probably used to his ideas
Anyone else would have been smoked on the spot. Zach, however, they just come to expect it
*grief cave*
@@stephweasenforth7891 Yup, their own little resident techie boy/mad engineer :D
I'm genuinely surprised that a kevlar sleeping bag isn't a commercial product of some kind.
There is something like it for sale though, kevlar school bags. You open it up and put it over your head, you now have kevlar protection in the front and back.
@@KamiKaZantA and that's how you know school shootings have become an institutionalized problem when the back-to-school list includes body armour.
@@KamiKaZantA Isn´t it concerning that you´d need a KEVLAR improved school bag in the first place?!
@@ChulioRCHulio Exceedingly.
@@KamiKaZantA And I'm pretty sure Kevlar blanket (even with handles like what Zach made with duct tape) is also a thing. There's a picture of schoolkids hiding under them during a drill that made headlines a few years ago.
Funny story time:
My grandpa was a Marine infantryman in Vietnam. On a particular day, where his camp was raided, he was injured, and got sent to Okinawa in Japan for treatment. Well, when he had finished his recovery, he boarded a Navy frigate that was headed back to Danang. Well, one day, he's sitting in his room on the frigate, bored. So, he gets up and goes to the kitchen aboard the frigate and steals a roll of Saran wrap. He then quietly sneaks into one of the Navy officers quarters. He goes into his bathroom, and wraps several layers of that Saran wrap around and on his toilet, just completely covered it. Then, he snuck back and hid in the room adjacent to it, with his ear to the wall. He hears the Navy officer go into his room, and goes out, then puts his ear on the wall to his quarters. After a bit, he hears a yell from inside the bathroom, "Son of a bitch!!". Cue, my grandpa dying from laughter as he slinked away from the room and returned to his own room. The best part, they never knew it was him.
Edit: damn yall, a thousand likes? Thanks!
Nice story 👍
Reminds me of a story my grandpa told me. He got lucky and was deployed to Korea just before they started sending people to Vietnam. He was on border duty where he would sometimes take naps and often when he woke up his meal was taken. So one day he asked the chef to put some laxatives in his food and long story short, he didn’t have to worry about his food disappearing anymore.
@@falloutfart9917 My grandpa did something similar, where he gave a guy half an Ex-Lax bar, and the dude shit himself on the parade deck during inspection with both the colonel and the general watching.
Marines old and young have one thing in common
Fucking with the Navy
@@NoBandwidth-0 now that is how you shit yourself in style
"War is mundane, until it's not." has got to be one of the greatest quotes ever. I want that as a poster.
Yeah. I once heard that “war is absolute boredom briefly punctured by abject terror,” and every story I hear from vets seems to confirm that
Finally, more military horror stories to keep me from joining to learn about guns the way Zach did.
ohh dude fucking same
but you could join the military with a non-combat job like communicstions specialist! they get to stay far away! (But they are still likely to get bombed but its small as hell.)
also gotta love the kevlar burrito
@@level20eevee75 or just join combat arms! You know you'll probably be in fire but at least you can do something about it
Alternatively just join the air force
Joining the military to learn guns is sorta like going to prison to learn about basketball. Go apprentice with a gunsmith instead
@@nogodsnokingsonlymen8538 point exactly
"It's like a rolodex."
I think more young people know what a flip clock is than a rolodex.
i thought it was a pokemon or something
I can't help but think of a Rolex, but he says "flip clock" and the exact image of a flip clock pops into my head.
It took me a moment to realize what he was talking about... and then "I got you, Babe" got stuck in my head.
Who doesn't know what a Rolodex is???
@@tesseract5569 People born after 1995? The rolodex has pretty much been replaced by the contact list in your phone or PDA (if anyone even has one of _those_ ).
"Let me die in my sleep, JACKASS!" Is probably my new favorite Zach quote
What was it previously
@@victorvangrimgamming6784 Gotta be either "I know more about how an AR-15 works than I do about interpersonal relationships." or "Let's show them what it means to have an itchy trigger finger and a loose set of morals."
Funny how funny people named Zach are
Im really surprised the Flak Sleeping Bag or "Bedding, Under Rolled, Incoming Threat Opposing (B.U.R.I.T.O)" isn't a thing the military developed. I suspect it would have to do with soldiers deciding they hate it and never using it, it taking up space, getting pissed on and ruined, etc.
Funny thing, in boot camp my dad ate tons of watermelon one night and pissed on the bed. He was terrified, and got up the guts finally to tell his sergeant so his bedding could be changed. He was shocked, instead of the officer making fun of him or yelling at him (like he expected), he was really understanding and told dad how to handle it and get it cleaned up, and never mentioned it to anyone. He definitely gained a lot of respect for that sergeant.
Nah, try expensive and too useful
nice acronym for it btw
Way too expensive but that's an amazing acronym
The whole "getting used to explosions" thing is very real here in Ukraine. Most people stop caring about air sirens after like 3-4 days of no audible hits, but when it comes, everybody hits the deck.
dang, hope you stay safe over there in Ukraine man, hopefully the conflict ends in a good way (Ukrainian victory with all the previous land recovered)
Remember, it's not the shell with your name on it you need to worry about. It's the ones addressed to "Resident" that are the real problem. Stay safe, comrade.
@@LexYeen We do, but no matter how much you try keeping that in mind, you still get too damn complacent after a while. Just human psyche I guess.
@@red_d849 Amen to that!
Damn bro, I hope you and your family are OK. I've seen a lot of news about Russias atrocities and I hope you don't get hurt
Your ally from the UK, use those Javelins well
Zach had more fun in Iraq than Fort Polk
At this point, I'm surprised nobody has given Zach a tribute video with little dark age playing in the background.
@@user-lj2cb2pj8j I'll take your word for it
@@antonhanna2423 Not really possible since there aren't any recognizable photos of him.
Iraqis had more fun in Iraq than anyone has ever had at Fort Polk. Ever.
most would
Now I want a kevlar sleeping bag
@Riqan Saliba an up armored woobie
Haha me too
Same.
@@underscore_nick1344 nah full plate armor that crap
One of my uncle's favorite stories was when his base was getting attacked. Apparently an rpg missed its intended target and hit a pallet of potato chips that had been delivered. Made a big mess and a big fire, and the whole base smelled like burnt potatoes for like 2 weeks after, and they didn't get any with their rations.
Good news, not body died, bad news, no munchies.
what a horrible war crime.
Heartbreaking
The baseball player you're thinking of is Randy Johnson and the only reason I know him is the pitch that exploded a bird
Wonder if that bird felt anything before becoming a cloud of feathers
@@skeltonslay8er781 nope, that was instant death.
@@skeltonslay8er781 "Oh my god, Randy Johnson, can I have your autogr-"
One time he got blown up by Dae-Sung Koo who then stole home. It was Pretty Good.
Zach is not the first person I've heard say they stopped giving a shit about being mortared, a guy in my last unit had been to Afghanistan, he said the first few times you hear the incoming alarm go off you book it to the nearest shelter. After that the alarm just becomes and inconvenience because it can wake you up. And then one day a mortar will land just a little closer than they usually do and you briefly get super serious about them again.
My dad served in Vietnam, and had some interesting stories himself. He was an RIO on the Intrepid, so plane crew. One of his favorite stories was about an F4 plane that suffered a 'fire' on launch. Soon as the plane gets off the deck, the pilot gets a fire warning. Now protocol was for the crew to eject, as opposed to trying to fix anything. So the second seat (a friend of my father) ejected. Now something to keep in mind, the F4 at that time had a system where if the pilot ejected, it'd cause the second seat to eject. However if the second seat failed, it didn't force the pilot to eject. So the moment the RIO ejected, the fire warning light went away. The pilot flew the plane around, caught a perfect 3 wire on his landing, and was waiting while the helicopter went out to pick up his RIO. The joking ensued, with everyone agreeing that the fire must have been in the RIO's seat.
Seems they finally introduced hot seat flying.
I have a feeling that the RIO probably ended up with a new callsign after that
In all likelihood it was probably the same kind of fire in the seat as the guy with cigarette in the humvee,
17:40 funny story from the workplace of my brother. Because of all the electronics they work with (not just the computers), they use a CO2 based fire extinguisher system for the building. and because you can't smell it, they put a citrus smell in it, so if it goes off or there's a leak, people notice and don't just suffocate... Also the reason the cleaning staff, under no circumstances, were allowed to use citrus "flavoured" cleaning agents...
Funny part was, they switched the cleaning company at some point and no-one told them. So they used something with a citrus smell to clean the office rooms and when people came back, they fled immediately again and pulled the fire alarm XD
And this is why you use bad smelling agents to indicate something bad, like rotten eggs, or liquid ass
I think the word you're looking for is citrus scented
@@Bonavire I only drink citrus flavored bleach.
There is actually a good reason you don't use water on magnesium fires.
The stuff burns so intense, it just splits the water to get to the oxygen and you're left with a cloud of hydrogen gas right next to a metal fire.
Putting water on burning magnesium is a good experiment to recreate the Hindenburg disaster.
@@HappyBeezerStudiosah, oxidizer fires
I love how they just let him sleep. Realizing he's safer than they are probably made then rethink the hallway thing
They wouldn't because the NCO and officer get in trouble for you getting injured by a piece of roof falling but don't get in trouble for a mortar killing you. So they are permanently stuck making your life miserable because the people in charge smoke things.
Granted it's our military and probably not
Depends on the building they're in but it would statistically lower the chance of individuals getting hit since rounds could say land all over the area. More spread out is better for group survivability but raises chances of individuals getting hit whereas all in one room makes it less likely to get hit albeir with the obvious downside. That plus the beloved c-rams could focus on an area if fire gets that intense
@@Nitro_Blitzen Totally depending on how it's build. I can only imagine the hallway being in the middle with the rooms on either side, so if a mortar round goes off outside the building, the hallway will have two walls and more distance to protect you.
In high-school we went to the local national gaurd armory. Part of the tour we were allowed to take pictures inside the apcs. One of my classmates managed to turn it on. I've never seen an adult get so angry as the Sgt was when he got them out of the APC.
Oh no he did a fucky wucky to the nth degree
It's literally just a big red button to turn a humvee on though, isn't it? Surely he could see a bunch of high schoolers pressing a big red button
@@archerymidnight3422 no, not a humvee, it had a big gun on it, with training rounds in the magazine.
@@archerymidnight3422 I'm pretty sure a Humvee has a switch to turn it on
i love the fact its just Mike and Zach having a conversation with corpses laying about
That's most of their conversations, standing and talking after killing several small armies worth of people
A normal day in the wasteland
That story about the insurgent mortars reminds me a lot of a story I heard about Gallipoli. The retreating Allied soldiers would throw together what they called "drip-fire" rifles that would use water and gravity (if I remember correctly) to trigger the rifles to discharge without the need of a shooter, that way they could have a bit of a distraction while they withdrew
Yeah the rifles were connected by string to a tin can that was slowly filled with dripping water. Once the can was filled with water the weight would pull the trigger and fire the gun. Get enough of those working at once and it sounds like a whole battalion is taking pot-shots at you.
The funniest part about the stealthy retreat is the guys left each night had to smoke more and more cigarettes so that way there was the same tobacco stench in the air otherwise the Ottomans would notice. So basically you eventually have these dudes running the length of the trenches setting up rifles, firing bursts from machine guns, and the whole time chain smoking fistfuls of cigarettes
@@johnbeauvais3159 Wouldn't you just burn them and just deal with the secondhand smoke?
@@soupcangaming662😅 , Because those cigarette sticks .Are from your rations. In the words of the immortal one, you might as well smoke them if you got them.
Honestly that kevlar blanket sounds like the fully evolved form of a weighted blanket. I would sleep *so* well with that.
I had a buddy who used a futon mattress as a blanket. Sounds pretty similar.
Humvees were absolutely used in front line combat during Desert Storm. They had TOW guns and automatic grenade launcher that saw extensive use.
So they were just used as weapon transports for the stuff you dont want your infantry wasting time and carrying capacity lugging around (like a fucking Mk19 full-auto 40mike-mike launcher.) and need to have on basically a reaction swivel.
Yeah, but that wasn't urban combat. In the anti tank role its like a sniper, shoot and scoot, and it's usually the flank, recon or rear guard force using light vehicles in that way, they weren't charging humvees at Iraqi tank formations, they were guarding US tank units from getting blindsided.
In urban ambushes and mined route traffic, you can't avoid getting hit with reliance on mobility. You have to just take it. In which case you want as much armor between you and the outside world as you can manage.
@@MandoWookie tl;dr: Humvees are great as a all-around super fast and light anti-tank/infantry role in conventional warfare.
Go into urban asymmetrical combat, you're fucked.
And then there is the Toyota War. Where they used Toyota pickups to mount guns.
@@soupcangaming662and in the Universe of Halo they still exist as Warthogs lol
My favorite fun time Incoming Mortar fire story is as follows. In our FOB we shared a building with another platoon from our company. My squad was on QRF so they had us get ready to go out since they saw a few dudes on a road near the wire and thought they might be spotting for the incoming mortars.
I threw on my kevlar but while i was doing so glanced into the other room and saw 3 or 4 dudes from the other platoon who were on the rest rotation low on the floor in their flak and kevlars,weapons in hand semi gathered around one of the shitty portable DVD players a bunch of us owned still intensely watching an episode of MTV's "16 & Pregnant" while all this nonsense was going on. So pretty much as Zach said,unless one lands really close you tend to not give a shit about incoming mortars lols.
My grandpa doesn’t talk much about his time in Vietnam but one of the only stories he told me. Was when you yelled at another guy for waking him because they were being mortared at his fire base.
zach's logic: if i get crushed by the building it's not my problem anymore i'm dead
“Oh, Hazard’s fine” just had me fucking rolling
I grew up near Hurlburt airforce base and got used to the C-130's and other planes and their bomb testing shaking the trailer house we lived in. I can fall asleep quickly when there are lots of loud planes, perfect sleep, love it. I miss it some days.
I remember them testing a MOAB there once, shook our whole school lol.
Good times as a kid
I looked up the transmission controls for the M113A3 - the positions from top to bottom are SL for steering lock, R for reverse and PV for pivot then 1-4,1-3,1-2,1 which refer to which gears you are allowing the transmission to select. It's not quite as arcane as Zach makes it sound but goddamn he tells a good story
“Just imagine a sleeping bag…but a BULLETPROOF sleeping bag!”
There's gotta be so many more great gems from Zach's military career.
Gods, I remember riding around in a canvas Humvee during OIF1. Lemme tell you, being on the ass end of a convoy, with a 240B across your lap, pulling rear security is an experience lol
Was just thinking "Are they ever gonna upload a new campfire stories?"
Using Siren Head to represent the sirens going off is certainly a nice touch.
The thought of APC Zach with a big shit eating grin is genuinely heart-warming. I think because its so easy to project onto and sortof feel by proxy in a way that, even as a member of a family filled with military stories (many negative), I can't *really* do as a civilian for some of your military stories. Like you can hear the basic training horror stories, and sortof grok those on account of their purpose, and you can get all the annoyances, but I'm certain that there's a truly visceral terror at something like a mortar that even empathy can't replace experiencing, let alone after it becomes banal, and a certain true fury that only helplessness in the illusion of a powerful position can bring (ala your Fort Polk experience in a Warrant officer position w/o the real authority). Although maybe the fury thing I can get a little for more mundane reasons.
I can't wait for that legend who animates these videos to animate this one specifically.
WAIT, THESE ARE ANIMATED?!
@@remnantrose6037 No. But one of the fans of these videos makes animated versions. They're very good. You'll probably find it under "Mikeburnsfire animated".
When I was in highschool (military boarding school) I gained the same complacency to fire alarms due to how many people set them off with smoking pot/cigs at like 2am. It was like a weekly thing, we all had to walk out to the blacktop, get in formation, only to have to go back to sleep because it was some shithead teen hotboxing their room. It got to a point where the alarm would go off and I legitimately had the thought “If it’s a real fire, at least I’ll be asleep when I burn.”
Gotta love the woodland camo in the desert!
"Did you see that column of moving bushes yesterday?"
"That's nothing! Last week, I saw a bush flying through the air!"
I really want this guys to play wasteland 3 I think Zach would just have a field day with it and the guns in it
He'd probably hate most of them, and I rather doubt he would enjoy the gameplay. He isn't a big RPG fan.
Unfortunately, in their last Dead Space 2 episode, they mentioned they weren't fans of the Wasteland games and had no interest in playing any of them.
Wait... there's a Wasteland 3?! I still haven't actually played 2!
@@LibraritheWizardOfficial Yeah. 3 Is much better in my opinion. It's in Coloradoand everything. You don't even need to have played 2 before playing 3 imo. I don't remember any spoilers for 2 at least.
@@jonsmith590 Spoils the end of the second game but it doesn't matter since 3's gameplay is significantly better and there is no cross game progression stuff.
I do have to say that these campfire stories are great and I love the setting it around an actual camp as if Zank and Mike are stopping for the day.
And then there's one where the company are camping in a burned out husk of an installation with literal dead bodies strewn about.
I love it.
4:26 Randy Johnson if anyone wanted to know
That poor bird
I was here to make that same comment but I’m glad someone knew enough about it to get it before ne
I like how the campfire these time is the smouldering ruins of the launch site
Its too bad that flex tape wasn't invented during the iraq war
What's weird is, my dad, who was a tellecom specialist in the air force. Had an up armored humvee in Korea back in 2000.
So we had the technology. And the hardware. It just went to the people who would need it the least.
18:21 I love this editing, the face really adds to the story it’s brilliant
Makes me think about being in job corps and having to evacuate the barracks every time someone set of the fire alarm. Even at night. It was a regular occurrence.
15:30 - It was at this point where I just start losing it, literally dying laughing. Thanks so much, I've got my best friend AND grandfather in pallative care RN, so I REALLY needed a good laugh.
20:24
And here I was expecting Mike to interject "Ah, you mean PRNDL"
As a tanker, I think I more or less referred to infantry as speedbumps more than crunchies. You will not hear the crunch over the EEEEEEEEEEEEEE in your ears constantly, but you will certainly feel it.
22:46 I don't know why, but Zach going "yay this is fun" just is so wholesome to me and makes me feel like a 7 year old with new toys, despite apc's and toys being WAY different
Speaking of armored humvee doors my one teacher was a QRF after 911 and he said they mounted plows on the doors for armor
I have a story about a stolen Humvee from a military base I towed
I work for a tow company that has impounds and I got called in to tow a "Hyundai" that was left at a church.
Wasn't a Hyundai, it was a Humvee that was taken from the decommissioned army base a bit down the road that they were transferring equipment and vehicles to the new one.
Someone broke in and stole it for a joyride and left it at a church down the road.
It was a Mobile workshop version, had tools and stuff at the back that was all open, most of the tools were stolen.
So I towed it back to our lot downtown and people were giving me the weirdest looks weaving through the streets of Portland, eventually bring it back to our lot and I start driving it around our impound yard because I've never driven one before.
I got told by our dispatchers that soldiers came by and picked it up that day and they were furious, not because we towed it but it was because the leader of the motor pool left the gate unlocked at the decommissioned base and left.
Whoops!
Decommissioned army base in Portland? The hell you on about, there hasn't been a real army base here since like Vietnam. All we got is OANG places like Camp Withycomb. I can't even think of the last time one of those closed down.
@@ericcameron7273 there is, it's a smaller one compared to the national guard base further south east. For the past year they've been hauling equipment from there to the giant one.
Even tho y’all advised against it I currently am in the marines. Rn I’m in school to be a combat videographer. I finished basic a little over a month ago and combat training about a week ago. So far it’s been my best decision yet. This is by no means suppose to be negative against the stuff y’all say if anything y’all’s content kinda gave me hope that things get better when I was going through training. Keep up the amazing videos
Well these guys were in a different era and the military has largely (definitely not completely) gotten its crap together over the years.
@@noneedtoknow07 I mean there's still - and there probably always will - be complete bs that happens...but honestly, imo it's kind of worth it yk? Like in regiment, shit happens, jokes are made; and i think, because it's so different from civvie life, the bs creates friends for life and creates things like these podcasts.
I'm best friends with someone because of the stupid shit that happened, and I'm sure @carless gaming and yourself have similar stories.
NEW CAMPFIRE STORY! :D
Also the guy you were looking for is Randy Johnson. Dude had a 102mph pitch, I cant imagine getting hit by that
The bird definitely did.
@@MrJJandJim lmao! according to an article i saw, he didnt even see it happen.
I miss these. I really cherish these videos and will replay them on multiple times
"when they said war was hell I didn't think it would mean it wouldn't let me sleep!" Gold.
Reminds me of MASH's 5 o'clock Charlie, a North Korean/Chinese pilot, who would show up flying erratically in a pre-WWII era plane, and shoot the ground a bit or drop a single tiny mortar bomb out the side of the cockpit like he's in WWI. He wouldn't hit anything, but they could set their watch to him, because he was always on time. I think one time he just dropped a package of leaflets that made little to no sense. I think the only time he was even close to being effective, was when Major Frank Burns tried to get an AA gun installed at the base to deal with the guy, but then that would have either led to the MASH unit being targeted as a combat installation, or 5 o'clock Charlie being killed and thus maybe getting replaced by a competent pilot. So basically Charlie would have succeeded in a way by driving the enemy to stupidity. 😅
The human brain's ability to normalize things is terrifying.
Also, good thinking on the Kevlar blankets.
Kinda want to think driving a tracked APC is like driving a modified armored Track Tractor. It's a similar setup except the transmission thing and some tractors are controlled by feet steering (brake pedals)
Zach really had a
Why are there 6 pedals if there are only 4 directions?
moment
I was one of those early GWOT guys that had unarmored Humvees. I remember the sandbags in the floorboards; old Vietnam-era flak vests tied to doors; locals making doors from scrap metal and all that.
These stories get more chaotic and funny at the same time
Finally someone else who found being in a MRI machine comfortable.
That story about the iced mortar tubes is incredibly smart! Working with such menial resources, those fighters truly came up with incredibly ingenious ideas.
These are the best
Zach talking about the flip clocks immediately brought one thing to my mind:
Groundhog Day
That's alarm clock is such a neat start. Nice
"If we're all gonna die, I'm not gonna die tired"
"Why did you wake me up just to die awake?"
😂
4:37 Thank you Zack for stopping your rage to enlighten us mortals
16:12 You know that that is Zach? That's god/fate/the universe giving you a gentle reminder to not be so cocky.
4:01 Randy 'The Monster' Johnson. I watched it happen.
That dude is insane though my favourite ever pitcher is koo dae sung
omfg.. the edits for the pictures and what not.. They always get me.. and always make me happy I take a bit of time to WATCH and not just listen. XD
I love these episodes
12:05 I've never worn body armor in triple digit Heat but if it's above 60 of course I'm talking Fahrenheit but if it's above 60 and you're wearing body armor you are going to be so fucking sweaty. That must have been absolute hell when it gets up to like 112 with the sun just glaring down at you with hatred in it's heart.
And if you're outside and sweaty when it gets nighttime you're gonna freeze as it gets cold
@@purplefood1 the one good thing about body armor in the cold is that as long as you weren't previously sweaty and therefore wet it does help keep the wind from just slicing through you to your bones.
@@Rurik_Luci that sounds like a desperate hope lol
@@purplefood1 it doesn't really help much when the wind itself he's like 60 miles an hour and the guests are breaking into 100 plus at that point it just becomes more game don't walk me over into the snow
Randy Johnson. "Baseball dude" was named Randy Johnson.
And he more or less cried on the mound when he hit that bird.
I love the tank rotation animation XD
I don’t think how long it was, but during the Polish military’s deployment to the Middle East, before the switch to humvees, we were using Polish built Honker Tarpans - shitty 4x4, like if you could make a knockoff of a knockoff of a Land Rover. They were, of course, unarmored. Therefore many drove through their missions covered in body armoured attached with duct tape
Imagine zach growing wings after he leavis his cocoon
Hearing zach talking about unarmoured humvees reminds me of how the PSNI (police) in Northern Ireland done the same thing.. until it became it's own vehicle the current model being the "Land Rover Tangi"
And currently in use is the pangolin Land rover.
I always wondered how a psni landrover would have handled Afghanistan... I think decently well, maybe minus the fact it would probably turn into a oven with the armour.
This was a good video.
I love how Zach makes fun of people correcting others about vehicles not being tanks and seconds later he does it to Mike lmao
I love that Zach is able to remember Randy Johnson's most legendary pitch but forgot his name
Best pitcher hands down you cannot disagree
A NEW ZACH IS BORN: KEVLAR BURRITO ZACH
They took the concept of a drip rifle and basically made a drip mortar... you can say what you want about them- but to be fair, that's actually some damn good thinking on their part.
Hell yeah campfire stories
My grandpa was in the navy during vietnam and sometimes they would occasionally get mortared at night. One night they were under fire and their protocol was to leave the barracks and trek to a bomb shelter across the base, real smart. The mortars started dropping and my grandpa and his buddies get up and start making their way to the bunker, but one guy didn't put on his belt leading to his pants falling to his ankles. The dude pulled up his pants and continued on his way about 5 feet before his pants dropped again. This happened a few more times and everyone's laughing at the guy as he tries to run, until eventually the just grabbed the guy by the arms and dragged him to the bunker, but so much time had passed that there were no more mortars.
I fucking laughed out loud so hard I'm pretty sure I woke up my neighbours at the burrito Zach part
Zach is probably the best story teller I’ve seen on UA-cam. Fucker could make algebra sound interesting
I think Zach is now my sleep related idol.
the sandbag on the floor trick actually originates from WW2, soldiers would put on beneath their seats to absord shrapnel from mines. IDK if it worked super well.
CAMPFIRE STOOOOOOORRRRRIIIIEEESSSS ❤❤❤🥹🥹🥹HELL YYEEEEESSSS
The goofy A Humvee when it has to drive arround INSIDE OF THE ENEMIES HOME TERRITORY
Woodland camo equipment?
Remind me of Generation Kill
How come the reporter gets desert?
@@TheTerminatorCarrot because he bought his off of eBay lol
@@Burnsidef250 that and the weirdest flak vest ever lmao
My guy, legit, “5 more minutesed!” a mortar attack.
So I know we're supposed to portray war as hell in modern works but am I the only one who'd watch a M.A.S.H. style show where they just took stories like these ones and integrated them into a storyline.
In Afghanistan we were getting mortared constantly and couldn’t find the enemy firing position… come to find out they were doing the ice block trick along with having buried the mortar tube completely into the ground and were using a rubber mallet tap the top of the mortar change the angle of fire. Took forever to find were they were firing from, lmfaooo.