The commodification of hangout spaces and the death of the American middle class has alot to do with it. In my town i cant even go to the park without having to pay $5 for parking. Coffee hangout? That's $10. Hangout for lunch? Thats $30-40? Cant even get out a bar without spending atleast $10-15.
The point about parking is really good. I thought of a lot of free things to do, and parking completely slipped my mind. There are so many ways they nickel and dime us, that it is challenging to keep up with them all.
I think a missed opportunity was to talk about the economic situation that pushes people toward staying home. You can’t really do anything anymore for cheap. So a lot of people choose to stay home to save money
The possibilities of what you can do with friends for free or cheap is near infinate. You just are not used to having to make your own fun. Seriously, you can go on a cross country road trip sleeping in the back of your (or your parents) minivan or suv, with the cost being no more than the cheap snack food you would have eaten on the couch anyway, and the cost of the gas.
@@klosnj11 I understand your point and I do agree that there is a lot of thing people can do for free, but in a lot of those cases you’re sacrificing other things in order for the activity to be cheap. In your example, there’s a big time commitment and sleeping in a van and eating snacks or fast food each day will take a toll on your body and health. Most people who have to work everyday can’t really do much other than go out with friends on to a restaurant or bar on the weekends and around cities that gets to be really expensive
@@klosnj11Here is how privileged you are. You dont even realize the privilege needed in the things you said. There are places where mostt of the people dont have a yard or most people dont have a car or hours of the day that they arent working to survive. Even having parents is a privileged in many places.
Driven extroverts are fine if they’re actually funny and ethical/moral ppl. If theyre self-congratulating, condescending, leftists who think everyones beneath them behind their backs, thats a society that sucks.
Absolutely. I miss the 1990’s. I had a huge circle of friends. Going to bars. Having dinner parties. Bumping into people I know. It’s brutal now. Just brutal.
The 90's was the bomb diggity. It wasn't odd to strike up a conversation with strangers and you could literally just make friends with people at a bar or concert and legit hang out with them later on.
The problem is you aren't making friends online. I make friends through my online art and gaming. You get a much more unique pick by being connected on the internet than just whoever happens to be acceptable around you
Decades ago we would meet up at a coffee shop, take turns playing music, reciting a poem, joke or story, discussing contemporary issues, or whatever. Now, your local coffee shop is probably a Starbucks with people siloed into their laptops, tablets and smartphones. Plus, we are learning online that the world is full of scammers, sociopaths, thieves, BS artists, trolls and time wasters. Then when we venture out into the real physical world we are automatically on guard around strangers.
I’d ask my friends to dinner but my food budget can’t afford going out. I’d go to concerts but they’ve become outrageously expensive. I’d go to the movies but it’s cheaper to stay at home and stream a movie. I still socialize with my friends by gaming and hanging out in voice chat. We have an unaffordability crisis. Edit: Forgot I also have to pay to park when I go places half the time.
This is true, but there are options - you could also spend time at the park with your friends, attend free events in your city, and have dinner parties where you and your friend make dinner together and split the grocery bill
Yeah and I'd invite people over but I'm not particularly proud of the place I can afford right now. I'm hopefully starting a new job soon and I'm moving to a slightly better spot that I hope will give me the confidence to invite people over way more.
It's funny how I can sympathize with all of this, having had the same experience when I live in a totally different continent... It's a global issue. We live in such brutal times...
People seek perfection in others. I see it every day. No one’s content to just meet chill people anymore. They only make an effort to make you a part of their lives if they perceive you as high status. “Life if they party, “super interesting”, “always surrounded by people”. People think they deserve the best of everything, which includes other people
You gotta broaden your horizons then. There are places where you can meet chill people, it’s just that it may be hard to find them. They don’t tend to be the “hip” places. But they do exist. I go to one of those places every week. Best of luck finding yours.
Here are some root causes that led to this: suburban sprawl and high housing costs in which everyone lives further away from each other (makes it inconvenient to make plans), the high cost of going out to eat/drink, American white collar work culture in which we work overtime without any extra pay and thus have less free time to socialize.
Truth. I live in a pre-boomer neighborhood. People don't realize how much it changes a community to have places to walk to. I can walk down the street to one of the nearby restaurants and coffee places and talk to neighbors I meet there. It's an actual community and we killed that experience because mild annoyance at car noises.
I lived in NYC for a decade. The problem described was still an issue, if not worse. If suburban sprawl were a cause, I would’ve been hanging with friends every week. This was not the case
I know that I'm order for me to have a place to live, I had to work 60hrs a week, or more, wake up early AF and live within about 35 minutes from my job. So needless to say, I don't see friends that often. It's work, shower, eat sleep.
39, single, no kids. I’m in sales and communicate virtually or in person with my team or customers 8-11 hours a day. I need some peace at the end of the day. My circle is smaller and tighter than ever and I’m happier because of it. Being social costs a lot of money and I’m not interested in those large expenditures like I used too
39 single and no kids is a lonely life. I have a wife and three kids and work 8-10 hours a day. My house is always chaos and when I’m alone after 4 hours I miss it. I have no clue what to do with myself. Human interaction is what gives you life especially with the family you create. Don’t miss out because you’re comfortable, it will only get worse.
@@expendable4h002 I wish parents (and I am a father to 3, all under the age of 15), would stop trying to convince themselves and others that the "chaos" is something to be missed. Its not. Its detrimental to a individual's mental health. The fact that you dont feel comfortable being alone with yourself is the real problem.
Being social costs very little: I play in an 50+ soccer league for the last 20 years, 20 Sunday mornings a year for $125. We are a band of 25 brothers who have made post-game fellowship with food and drink expandable to our entire families; we've buried 3 comrades in the last 3 years, been through cancer and pink slips and been there for each other as an escape from those low points. Likewise, I play Lax every Wednesday night, for free, rain, shine or snow, with 30 guys who allow us to blow off steam and compete all with the knowledge that we need to go to work the next day. I didn't know any of these people until I sought out a team to play with. I think many people are lazy or fearful of the unknown, when what they may be craving is only a new relationship away.
I really love and enjoy my alone time. Also, a lot of people are not mentally, emotionally, and spiritually well. I have a lot more peace and joy by myself. I’m also very introverted, so I am thoroughly enjoying this era of more isolation. My heart does go out to those that deal with loneliness.
I feel people are also living vicariously through social media, choosing to view experiences instead of having them themselves. Life can be full of disappointing interactions but people still continued as real life was all we had. Now you can ‘opt out’ and search for whatever you want online, albeit in a less satisfying and thus ultimately lonely experience.
Neighbors don't talk to neighbors. Life has become more dangerous. You dont trust strangers. Crime or the perception of it is high. There is absolutely zero respect for one another. People are not courteous, they dont hold doors, they dont greet each other. I am in a gen xer raised by silent generation parents from Sicily. Very different culture, there was a warmness in community. All of that is gone now
"hey wanna go to the hockey game this weekend".... "no i don't have $200 to spend"... "what about the bar"... "..." "what about skiing, lets do something outside" ... "I don't have $200 for hockey you think i have $1500 to ski?"
Hey wanna come over for build-your-own-pizza night? Hey wanna come over for movie night? Hey wanna come over and work on a project? Hey our friend said he’s streaming the Super Bowl, wanna bring some beer and watch with us? I get what you’re saying but you don’t have to “go out” to hang out.
@@heretic.137 that’s true but you also need a place that’s big enough to host people and most young people don’t even have an apartment with a roommate let alone their own place. Many are still living with their parents which isn’t exactly the ideal situation for social engagements.
@@HaHaGirl16 Why the need for perfection? 20-somethings should just want to have fun. Ya'll are just a bunch of puppies. When there is fun to be had, inconvenience is nothing. We would cram so...many...people into tiny apartments to watch a movie, or to play board games. Everything was open invite. We were non-drinkers, so all of our parties were low-cost.
@@HaHaGirl16 you’re definitely right. If that’s the case I’d recommend talking to your parents and tell them you want to have people over. Coordinate a night when they are planning to go out and you can have people come over. Also I’d suggest re-framing it in your mind from hosting to hanging out. It’s not thanksgiving dinner, just a movie night or something small and fun so don’t overthink it.
That's quite true. How often can people walk to one another? Not get in a car and find somewhere to walk/talk. I'm in Texas and.... outside the suburbs... sidewalks are not available. If the side walk isn't connected to money/business, there is none. You have to drive 15min to get to a store, 30min-90mins to visit a friend/family/go on a date.
I agree about tv, cars, and smart phones, but my main problem is that I'm exhausted. I don't have time in the day to take care of myself, let alone do something frivolous like go out and see other people.
I am alone a lot, and I am not depressed or sad. I love reading and enjoying my own company. When I want to socialize, I go for a walk with friends or I run with my running group. I am also friendly with my neighbors and hang out with some of them from time to time.
I think it's more of a crisis for young people. As you get older, you've had, in some respects, your "fill" of socializing time with people. Hanging out and partying in groups is invigorating when you're 19, but can feel exhausting later on. But normal cognitive and emotional development requires a youth that involves at least some normal group interactions, and the kids of today are just not exposed to it.
i don't invite a few of my friends out anymore because i know they have no money. They always say "if your hanging out after, let me know!" but it doesn't usually happen.
I'm a 38 year old white male. Outside of work. I spend 100 percent of my time alone. It's just not a good idea getting involved in other people's lives. Or letting people get involved in mine.
Hey man. I’m a 24 year old Indian guy. I met another 36 year old white guy at work (FedEx) all his friends died from heroin and he doesn’t have any skills. I suspect there’s a a lot of these types of white guys aimlessly wondering where America went. He can’t afford a house and has to move, women (white), he complains are too stuck up and smokes weed all day. I think there’s millions of guys like him out there. I keep telling him this all leads to revolution.
This is the mentality that will lead to further destruction of society. So many people act like this is revolutionary. No, it’s infantile. A truly smart idea would be to intentionally create strong communities. “It’s just not possible bro, people suck” yeah…you included. We could just all try to suck less.
I can't talk to the cause of the trend, but I've noticed I'm far more outgoing than my age group and seen as strange for being willing to talk to "stranger" and to engage in collaboration. And I'm near 60 years old. My daughters are more outgoing than their friends, but just between my daughters I can see more progress toward isolation. One thing I've seen is that they don't get together with friends casually, they have to plan it out, and if they hit ANY stumbling blocks then it gets cancelled. When I was a kid I went to friends houses and we went and gathered more friends. Cell phones, not just smart phones, were a major accelerator of isolation when you consider that everyone is available for contact all the time, so you don't have to go out to talk to someone out in the world. You can ALWAYS communicate with them so you don't need to see them.
I was in Europe for my masters, and I am from a developing country. Every relation seemed so transactional, and superficial, no one wanted to be good friends. I am so happy to be back home:)
I was born in 88, and after school, I would play basketball and skateboard with random kids. Now, even parents stay inside and play video games. There's a HUGE number of millennials and younger people who work and play video games. Add porn on phones and trifecta.
being alone is awesome.. all i need is my pc and my video/game library/ebook library. i dont even need the internet, i have acquired so much over the years.. my guitar/ amp,my cats and some weed and im very content with being alone fyi.. being alone is not the same as being lonely.. there is a huge difference... i stay isolated by choice and because i have no choice. both are true
He speaking to those who absolutely can not enjoy life without the company of others. He leaves out this also applies to the masses who subscribe to group think as well and have sheep mentality. I'm both introverted and extroverted, the past four years of witnessing how willing others are to deliberately spread their disease has made me hyper aware of obnoxious behaviors and behaviors that contradict my health and well-being. I never realized how much I enjoy not having someone breath in my face.
Decline or church attendance is a big one. My 95 year old grandpa was not a very religious man, but he said he liked going because his friends were there and they’d chat after, while the wives would do the same, this was rural Illinois until the 90s he said.
there are no common spaces anymore, especially ones that cost little or no money. you need a car to get anywhere in 95% of the country and have to pay at every possible turn to do anything
Goddamn the cope of the crying face is so fucking sad its crazy. I really feel so bad for so many ppl on a daily basis over using those emoji’s like damn life really has gotta be rough for mfrs n mfrs really gotta be on the verge of tears at all times
Socializing is quite often an expensive endeavor these days. To everyone saying you can just go out for free, it doesn't have to cost money, etc. It can be very difficult to find individuals in a social circle who hold the same frugal habits as you. The average American isn't famous for their responsible spending habits. Usually when people invite you to hang out, it is likely going to cost money. If you suggest a "free" alternative, you're likely just going to end up alone. I know the response here will be "oh well just find different/better friends". Yes, thank you in advance for being totally unhelpful lol
Honestly 😅 when I did hangout, my friends hated doing free stuff with me. Aka Nature activities, working out, art... they all wanted to club, bar, go downtown, malls etc.
I'm relieved that I live in a major city that has decent public transportation options, and that I'm able to walk to my friends. A big part of the problem in modern American life is the suburban sprawl in which so many people live.
It might seem nitpicky but can we call it being asocial not being antisocial? People dont seem to understand antisocial refers to violent, psychopathic, maciavellian, remorseless people who like hurting others. Asocial just refers to not wanting or not being social. I think this misuse leads to a lot of negative stigma and misunderstanding
I think it impacts introverts and extroverts differently. I''m an introvert who plays games with my friends in the evenings and boardgames a couple of times a month. Nothing has really changed. Now, extroverts have the need to interact with people in person. At least more than introverts.
I don't feel "alone", if anything I'm a social-seeming, people liking, introvert. I constantly feel guilty I'm not hanging out with friends more, but I just feel like I don't have the money or the time like I used to. I was an only child and grew up like this, playing by myself, and I loved it. I feel like I truly need this time more than other people. maybe the fact that families are smaller like this increases this too? anyways, my friends constantly beg me to hang out, and of course I do, but I always feel soooo burnt out socially. my job is super social where I speak to strangers about intimate details of their life/career/finances and their goals. I come home and all I want to do is just completely unplug and focus on myself. for me, I think the stress of nowadays has made me need even more alone time to recharge. I've always loved alone time... but I've never felt THIS much like I need alone time or I will just scream or have a breakdown. what is this about? I just constantly feel like I'm not doing enough, not hanging out with friends enough, not talking to them enough... it's an endless cycle and makes me wanna shut off even more. I've also completely given up on social media because it just stresses me out now instead of bringing me any joy.
I feel like every problem in the US is a result of horrible urban planning which encourages isolation from neighbours and dependency on the car. Which I feel is a result of the US having a too extreme culture of individuality.
Socializing cost money. There was a yoga class i went to once but she shut up it down bc the rent became too high. Not mention people didnt come on a regular basis
Can confirm: i live in NYC, but i spent a lot of time in Alaska. They disagree, boy do they disagree (a strange mix of millenial Christians and "crunchy" West Coast sorts, and much else, including slickers from NYC), but they won't turn their backs on each other. Never ever. That was really the true taboo. It was a "bush" community, and there was a distinct possibility one day your life might depend on one of them. Refreshing, really.
I moved a lot as a kid and whenever I moved, I lost loads of friendships because even back in the “good old days” proximity was everything. Moved away from home for my first career job. Tried very hard to connect with people but they’d agree to meet, then flake out. After the 9th person to flake on me, I just learned to occupy myself. This was in 2008. When Covid hit, I had already been there done that with isolation enough times. In most of my friendships I’d have to do all the initiating. People don’t want to reciprocate. It’s a lot of effort. Now my social group is small and only includes those that do take the time to share the work. But ultimately, I would rather rely on myself for happiness than external forces I can’t control.
I used to live in a more working class part of my city, and I would see kids out in the street playing sports or riding bikes all the time. Now I live in a more upper middle class area and I never see kids out playing.
I literally had to become sober because I couldn’t afford going out. I think it’s hampered a lot of social development for me. So much of our culture is about going out and I’m boxed out of that cus I’m too poor.
@@arihia45I’m someone who is by nature extremely social. People are not good at being social. They are not really good, at all. If one is supremely pro-social….. One is often alone. You can’t be pro-social and enjoy the company of the anti-social. That’s not how it works.
@@nataliaalfonso2662 I can’t imagine how a person in the middle of typing out a paragraph essentially saying: “I’m not the problem, it’s everyone else” doesn’t pause and do a little self reflection
Dating is 100% impossible in the social media era. I have come to grips with the fact that I will be single forever and I'm actually OK with after my last GF's were just so terrible.
Dating has become a hellscape too. With each year, just getting a date every few weeks or so is an achievement when it used to be you could open an app like Tinder back in 2015 and have several dates in a single week. Everyone just seems vacant and anxious. Something is definitely wrong and it's getting worse with each year that goes by.
Face it, you aren’t seen as “attractive” as you were back then because 90% of them are trying to match with 10% of us. The catalogue has grown and the top 10% of us are having their heyday. Who knew impersonalizing dating and making it all about a 15 second advertisement would destroy dating?
I'm 41. I think it's important to note that it's very hard as an adult to just "hang out" now. Work schedules are a major hindrance to that in my life and money is another. After buying groceries I and my friends don't have a lot of money to spent and I don't hear this guy or many like him speaking to these realties.
The technology angle is a good one (though economics is also clearly at play). The book “In the Absence of the Sacred” makes a good critique of the way tech has separated us. The most poignant example was the author noting that growing up in the 50s, no one had a tv, and neighbors talked all the time, hanging out on their porches. Then one person in the neighborhood got a tv, and everyone hung out there to watch it. Then everyone got a tv, and no one talked anymore. Just like that: blind consumerism got us trapped in antisocial patterns. It’s a much much bigger problem than we like to acknowledge or even talk about.
Meh. Ending up alone was something I worried about as a teenager but now that I'm past my teens/20s I genuinely prefer to be alone. I don't have to wear a mask to pretend to be something I'm not and there's so much less drama. I'm alone but I am not lonely.
i have a theory that the more energy a society produces the more lonely they get. and soon the entire planet will produce massive amounts of energy. maybe hyper technologically leads to loneliness
We’re only a handful out of 100. What about the others? It is deeply unhealthy for them. These sick people will lead to a sick society. Isolation destroys them!
INTP and I think its great. So many people being too poor to socialize has forced them into isolation. Isolation has forced them into thinking. Thinking has forced them into questioning why they are so poor and who created these conditions. It's going pretty well tbh. People are starting to notice.
Missing from this conversation is the fact that everytime you leave the house you risk spending a lot of money. Restaurants and all forms of public entertainment are very expensive and staying at home has the double reward of being comforting and cost effecticve.
I’m a true loner and always have been - but I truly feel better when I spend time with friends at least 1x per week otherwise I just get weird and forget how to interact with humans lol
No, she just asked a question probably multiple viewers were thinking about, and he answered it very well. It’s interesting how well your comment reflects the general social attitudes they were talking about in the video.
Dude the fact that you even used "TDS" to refer to her is showing that you're apart of the problem that this guy was talking about. You're so invested into a politicaI figure that you're using made up online terms like "TDS" to insult people that don't like him. Which is showing that you're trapped in some chronically online echo chamber that cheers on the guy 24/7. He doesn't even know who you are bro, and he doesn't even care who you are either. You're a grown man so start acting like it and stop constantly following behind another grown man.
Everyone is different. Some people need more social interaction than others. For some people who tend to absorb other people’s energy being away from people is more healthy then being around them
This is why the military was great for community. Unfortunately, loneliness or disconnect is also why Veteran suicide is high. Loss of tribe/community.
@@thewirah1 if that was right? Is the reason why loneliness is happening and civilian suicides have skyrocketed, and people feel nothing due to partaking in slave labor by participating in capitalism vs homestead centric?
Everything has gotten prohibitively expensive for the average person. Everything increased from food, transportation, insurance costs, energy, housing etc. etc. A night the movies for two used to run one 30-40 bucks, now you need 60. Dinners anywhere nowadays for two is $70+. Don’t get me started on every single place asking and prompting tips. Consumers are getting squeezed left right and center. A lot of people see it for what it is, the moment you set foot outside of your home, your pockets start bleeding money, more and more people are staying home as much as possible. Not to say that they don’t get to us there, because they do, online shopping, streaming services, other subscriptions, etc etc.
wtf has time to socialize and build friendships? Both my wife and I are gainfully employed professionals with two school aged kids. Between work, kids, and maintaining a home, I don't have the time or energy for anything. Life is a series of shoe-horning things in between daily requirements. I miss music, art, reading, hanging out, etc.
So much of the corporate model involves taking jobs wherever they may be. You have to have a corporate job to get a loan or buy a house or get health insurance so people will move away from family and friends to get said job and then realize that they’re miserable with no friends or no network. You then build the network but there are very few internal promotions in corporate America so then you have leave the company and your network you built to get the promotion. We all now live shoulder to shoulder and have no friends… isn’t it great?!?
Since a few people are getting married compared to historical standards, I think many like myself decided that if we aren’t going to get married and pursue a spouse, why should I go waste money doing outside activities that I don’t find worth the trouble?
You know what els would hep people to start to come out and start living again? Is if they could afford anything more than rent, utilities and a cellphone payment.
It is hard to find people who don't believe in absolute nonsense. I don't do social media, it is a scam by corporations. I move often due to jobs being unstable. People don't want to hang out anymore. I hang out with my one friend and he is still drawn to being on his phone. I can be talking to him and he checks his phone. I have thought about just walking away from him as well. Modern adults don't understand their own choices, it is pathetic.
This all makes sense and there are multiple factors for the cause in totality. Financial is #2 but in my opinion it was the phones and social media starting in 2011-2012. Literally destroyed the social fabric of society.
Living near a town of 30ish people and maybe 150 people on the outskirts,its the pub with friends on Thursday and breakfast Sunday morning. Grabge one week. Bunco the following. Yoga every Tuesday night. Started walking with friends because there is a wolf in the area. There are cheap and free things to do everywhere.
The commodification of hangout spaces and the death of the American middle class has alot to do with it. In my town i cant even go to the park without having to pay $5 for parking. Coffee hangout? That's $10. Hangout for lunch? Thats $30-40? Cant even get out a bar without spending atleast $10-15.
The point about parking is really good. I thought of a lot of free things to do, and parking completely slipped my mind. There are so many ways they nickel and dime us, that it is challenging to keep up with them all.
Where do u live at lol. 10 coffee? No free parks at all? 30-40 lunch?
City parks are free. And yes suburbia/parking/cars are terrible for society.
@@jrad410in the last few years I’ve visited Seattle and NYC and he’s right.
capitalism baby
I think a missed opportunity was to talk about the economic situation that pushes people toward staying home. You can’t really do anything anymore for cheap. So a lot of people choose to stay home to save money
💯
The possibilities of what you can do with friends for free or cheap is near infinate. You just are not used to having to make your own fun.
Seriously, you can go on a cross country road trip sleeping in the back of your (or your parents) minivan or suv, with the cost being no more than the cheap snack food you would have eaten on the couch anyway, and the cost of the gas.
@@klosnj11 I understand your point and I do agree that there is a lot of thing people can do for free, but in a lot of those cases you’re sacrificing other things in order for the activity to be cheap. In your example, there’s a big time commitment and sleeping in a van and eating snacks or fast food each day will take a toll on your body and health. Most people who have to work everyday can’t really do much other than go out with friends on to a restaurant or bar on the weekends and around cities that gets to be really expensive
@@klosnj11Here is how privileged you are. You dont even realize the privilege needed in the things you said. There are places where mostt of the people dont have a yard or most people dont have a car or hours of the day that they arent working to survive. Even having parents is a privileged in many places.
The park is always free.
Once you learn to be alone. It becomes addicting, no expectation from anyone and very peaceful.
I went to a movie alone - it was a great experience
The lack of people with any substance makes alone time a reward rather than a bad thing
Going outside costs money
this, everytime you do something social thats a 100 minimum out the door
THIS!!
What? No, it doesn't. I go outside several times every day to walk my dog, I have yet to be charged any amount to do so.
You know you can have a conversation with your friends, hike, walk around with them for free right?
Or, and hear me out, maybe you go outside with friends and just...talk? And walk? Go to each other's houses? Idfk just a thought...
I'm not alone. Saager is my best friend. He tells me what is okay to say out loud.
🤣
Hmm, wonder why the BP comments section bots haven't shown up here yet.
I would rather be alone, than hang out with Saagar
Me too! I love saagar. He's is my friend. Maybe krystal too....maybe.
@@fredocorleone5040 i agree. I only hang out with losers
I used to think the worst thing in life is winding up alone, it's not. The worst thing in life is winding up with people who make you feel alone.
I don't think a loud competitive society of driven extroverts is particularly fun.
Driven extroverts are fine if they’re actually funny and ethical/moral ppl. If theyre self-congratulating, condescending, leftists who think everyones beneath them behind their backs, thats a society that sucks.
@@azalia423 💯
@@Stranger_In_The_Alps realest thing ever said here
That's a Robin Williams quote.
Absolutely. I miss the 1990’s. I had a huge circle of friends. Going to bars. Having dinner parties. Bumping into people I know. It’s brutal now. Just brutal.
The 90's was the bomb diggity. It wasn't odd to strike up a conversation with strangers and you could literally just make friends with people at a bar or concert and legit hang out with them later on.
@@Introverted100feminists consider that assault now
The problem is you aren't making friends online. I make friends through my online art and gaming. You get a much more unique pick by being connected on the internet than just whoever happens to be acceptable around you
@@JasonDoege-js8io Are you meeting these folks in real life?
I miss the 90’s
Over all these years, the more I've interreacted with people the less I want to be around them.
You're not alone (ironically).
You just haven’t found the right people imo
💯only blood relatives
@@Matt-s6y 🧢
translation : "I am an incel"
Work is bleeding us of our will to live, let alone to be social when we have time to rest.
Who can afford to go out to dinner these days?
you probably just door dashed taco bell for $34
Invite your friends over and cook together. Pretend you're on top chef. Actually try
What ?? Ur hate for Krystal has made you hear shi* she didn't say. Sounds like you are one of those toxic tribal moron 😅😅
Obviously a lot of people or else there wouldn't be restaurants.
Was going out to dinner your only source of socializing back when you socialized? That lacks creativity, ya know.
Decades ago we would meet up at a coffee shop, take turns playing music, reciting a poem, joke or story, discussing contemporary issues, or whatever. Now, your local coffee shop is probably a Starbucks with people siloed into their laptops, tablets and smartphones.
Plus, we are learning online that the world is full of scammers, sociopaths, thieves, BS artists, trolls and time wasters. Then when we venture out into the real physical world we are automatically on guard around strangers.
Ppl turned them into fucking libraries 😂
I’d ask my friends to dinner but my food budget can’t afford going out. I’d go to concerts but they’ve become outrageously expensive. I’d go to the movies but it’s cheaper to stay at home and stream a movie. I still socialize with my friends by gaming and hanging out in voice chat. We have an unaffordability crisis.
Edit: Forgot I also have to pay to park when I go places half the time.
This is true, but there are options - you could also spend time at the park with your friends, attend free events in your city, and have dinner parties where you and your friend make dinner together and split the grocery bill
Yeah and I'd invite people over but I'm not particularly proud of the place I can afford right now. I'm hopefully starting a new job soon and I'm moving to a slightly better spot that I hope will give me the confidence to invite people over way more.
It's funny how I can sympathize with all of this, having had the same experience when I live in a totally different continent... It's a global issue. We live in such brutal times...
The answer is staring everyone in the face. Literally almost every systemic problem we face is tied to American capitalism.
Or is it the leftist policies that lead to the destruction of the nuclear family?
Bro.... I can't AFFORD to just "go out with friends". This isn't a "choice".
Everyone's becoming more like me with each year that passes. In another decade i might not even feel that alone anymore...
That's probably not a good thing
@CyranoForever101 autistic robot world? In the eye of the beholder.
People seek perfection in others. I see it every day. No one’s content to just meet chill people anymore. They only make an effort to make you a part of their lives if they perceive you as high status. “Life if they party, “super interesting”, “always surrounded by people”. People think they deserve the best of everything, which includes other people
the irony is that the "high status" people are increasingly becoming "low quality" people. things will have to turn around eventually
You gotta broaden your horizons then. There are places where you can meet chill people, it’s just that it may be hard to find them. They don’t tend to be the “hip” places. But they do exist. I go to one of those places every week. Best of luck finding yours.
Ya must live in Kansas
Nah that’s crazy 😂😂😂😂😂people are violently evil and horrific to people they perceive as better than them.
Horrific.
It’s not “people”. Some people. This is a you problem, not them.
Here are some root causes that led to this: suburban sprawl and high housing costs in which everyone lives further away from each other (makes it inconvenient to make plans), the high cost of going out to eat/drink, American white collar work culture in which we work overtime without any extra pay and thus have less free time to socialize.
Truth. I live in a pre-boomer neighborhood. People don't realize how much it changes a community to have places to walk to.
I can walk down the street to one of the nearby restaurants and coffee places and talk to neighbors I meet there. It's an actual community and we killed that experience because mild annoyance at car noises.
I lived in NYC for a decade. The problem described was still an issue, if not worse.
If suburban sprawl were a cause, I would’ve been hanging with friends every week. This was not the case
If you live in the city you don't leave your parking spot
@@CTKearns Can you elaborate? I don’t understand
I know that I'm order for me to have a place to live, I had to work 60hrs a week, or more, wake up early AF and live within about 35 minutes from my job. So needless to say, I don't see friends that often. It's work, shower, eat sleep.
39, single, no kids. I’m in sales and communicate virtually or in person with my team or customers 8-11 hours a day. I need some peace at the end of the day. My circle is smaller and tighter than ever and I’m happier because of it. Being social costs a lot of money and I’m not interested in those large expenditures like I used too
39 single and no kids is a lonely life. I have a wife and three kids and work 8-10 hours a day. My house is always chaos and when I’m alone after 4 hours I miss it. I have no clue what to do with myself. Human interaction is what gives you life especially with the family you create. Don’t miss out because you’re comfortable, it will only get worse.
@@expendable4h002 i’m 38 single no kids and don’t experience loneliness, now what?
@@expendable4h002 I wish parents (and I am a father to 3, all under the age of 15), would stop trying to convince themselves and others that the "chaos" is something to be missed. Its not. Its detrimental to a individual's mental health. The fact that you dont feel comfortable being alone with yourself is the real problem.
Being social costs very little: I play in an 50+ soccer league for the last 20 years, 20 Sunday mornings a year for $125. We are a band of 25 brothers who have made post-game fellowship with food and drink expandable to our entire families; we've buried 3 comrades in the last 3 years, been through cancer and pink slips and been there for each other as an escape from those low points. Likewise, I play Lax every Wednesday night, for free, rain, shine or snow, with 30 guys who allow us to blow off steam and compete all with the knowledge that we need to go to work the next day. I didn't know any of these people until I sought out a team to play with. I think many people are lazy or fearful of the unknown, when what they may be craving is only a new relationship away.
If you are lonely, then I suggest a bad relationship. Once it runs its course, you will be thankful for solitude.
I couldnt win so i just took my ball and went home. Lazy..
😂😂😂😂😂
I miss my bad relationships.
You need help, cousin
I probably spend 95% of my time alone.
It’s so much more peaceful than my previous lifestyle.
Even Americans find other Americans insufferable.
I really love and enjoy my alone time. Also, a lot of people are not mentally, emotionally, and spiritually well. I have a lot more peace and joy by myself. I’m also very introverted, so I am thoroughly enjoying this era of more isolation. My heart does go out to those that deal with loneliness.
Same! I love being alone.
Yeah this is more of a crisis for people who like to hear their own voice. Lol!
I feel people are also living vicariously through social media, choosing to view experiences instead of having them themselves. Life can be full of disappointing interactions but people still continued as real life was all we had. Now you can ‘opt out’ and search for whatever you want online, albeit in a less satisfying and thus ultimately lonely experience.
This is why I and many others play video games. You only have one life? As a gamer, I have many lives.
Neighbors don't talk to neighbors.
Life has become more dangerous. You dont trust strangers. Crime or the perception of it is high. There is absolutely zero respect for one another. People are not courteous, they dont hold doors, they dont greet each other.
I am in a gen xer raised by silent generation parents from Sicily. Very different culture, there was a warmness in community.
All of that is gone now
Married, full-time job, loneliest I've ever been.
"hey wanna go to the hockey game this weekend".... "no i don't have $200 to spend"... "what about the bar"... "..." "what about skiing, lets do something outside" ... "I don't have $200 for hockey you think i have $1500 to ski?"
Hey wanna come over for build-your-own-pizza night? Hey wanna come over for movie night? Hey wanna come over and work on a project? Hey our friend said he’s streaming the Super Bowl, wanna bring some beer and watch with us? I get what you’re saying but you don’t have to “go out” to hang out.
@@heretic.137 that’s true but you also need a place that’s big enough to host people and most young people don’t even have an apartment with a roommate let alone their own place. Many are still living with their parents which isn’t exactly the ideal situation for social engagements.
@@HaHaGirl16 Why the need for perfection? 20-somethings should just want to have fun. Ya'll are just a bunch of puppies. When there is fun to be had, inconvenience is nothing.
We would cram so...many...people into tiny apartments to watch a movie, or to play board games. Everything was open invite. We were non-drinkers, so all of our parties were low-cost.
@@HaHaGirl16 you’re definitely right. If that’s the case I’d recommend talking to your parents and tell them you want to have people over. Coordinate a night when they are planning to go out and you can have people come over. Also I’d suggest re-framing it in your mind from hosting to hanging out. It’s not thanksgiving dinner, just a movie night or something small and fun so don’t overthink it.
I remember when south park made the joke that anything fun costs at least 20 dollars. Now it's more like 50.
But people still pay the prices to see concerts and sporting events. If people want it, they will pay extravagant prices for it.
Having car culture is the reason for this! there is not easy to just walk around, plus people & police look at you like why you walking, its just bs
What?
That's quite true. How often can people walk to one another? Not get in a car and find somewhere to walk/talk. I'm in Texas and.... outside the suburbs... sidewalks are not available. If the side walk isn't connected to money/business, there is none. You have to drive 15min to get to a store, 30min-90mins to visit a friend/family/go on a date.
Don't blame cars on this. Put your phone down and go outside. My car let's me go places without homeless or drug addicts bothering me.
I agree about tv, cars, and smart phones, but my main problem is that I'm exhausted. I don't have time in the day to take care of myself, let alone do something frivolous like go out and see other people.
Introversion is a superpower. I hardly even know what they’re all talking about.
💯🤣
translation : ' I am lonely and am desperate for a gf but i go on the internets to tell everyone how it is cool to be introverted"
@@arihia45 translation: I’m a middle aged woman with my own home, my own money and my own time, who’s bored with men. You’re projecting perhaps?
@ translation: "I am post wall middle aged women who keeps getting rejected by men and am bored with them."
@@arihia45 ‘wall’😂 Have you met any men?
I am alone a lot, and I am not depressed or sad. I love reading and enjoying my own company. When I want to socialize, I go for a walk with friends or I run with my running group. I am also friendly with my neighbors and hang out with some of them from time to time.
I think it's more of a crisis for young people. As you get older, you've had, in some respects, your "fill" of socializing time with people. Hanging out and partying in groups is invigorating when you're 19, but can feel exhausting later on. But normal cognitive and emotional development requires a youth that involves at least some normal group interactions, and the kids of today are just not exposed to it.
Do you have a lot of friends?
i don't invite a few of my friends out anymore because i know they have no money. They always say "if your hanging out after, let me know!" but it doesn't usually happen.
Introvert + internet = why do I need to do anything else?
translation : 'i watch p0rn to fill my sexual desires'
I'm a 38 year old white male. Outside of work. I spend 100 percent of my time alone. It's just not a good idea getting involved in other people's lives. Or letting people get involved in mine.
It’s true, drama.
Hey man. I’m a 24 year old Indian guy. I met another 36 year old white guy at work (FedEx) all his friends died from heroin and he doesn’t have any skills. I suspect there’s a a lot of these types of white guys aimlessly wondering where America went. He can’t afford a house and has to move, women (white), he complains are too stuck up and smokes weed all day. I think there’s millions of guys like him out there. I keep telling him this all leads to revolution.
This is the mentality that will lead to further destruction of society. So many people act like this is revolutionary. No, it’s infantile. A truly smart idea would be to intentionally create strong communities. “It’s just not possible bro, people suck” yeah…you included. We could just all try to suck less.
In other words, you only find yourself interesting
Go to the gym
I can't talk to the cause of the trend, but I've noticed I'm far more outgoing than my age group and seen as strange for being willing to talk to "stranger" and to engage in collaboration. And I'm near 60 years old. My daughters are more outgoing than their friends, but just between my daughters I can see more progress toward isolation.
One thing I've seen is that they don't get together with friends casually, they have to plan it out, and if they hit ANY stumbling blocks then it gets cancelled. When I was a kid I went to friends houses and we went and gathered more friends.
Cell phones, not just smart phones, were a major accelerator of isolation when you consider that everyone is available for contact all the time, so you don't have to go out to talk to someone out in the world. You can ALWAYS communicate with them so you don't need to see them.
Part of this is the aging population isolated in suburbs
I was in Europe for my masters, and I am from a developing country. Every relation seemed so transactional, and superficial, no one wanted to be good friends. I am so happy to be back home:)
Admire this guest, the way he spoke was great! Sounded very professional and articulate in conveying his points.
Yes, I wanted to comment on the professionality of this guest as well, compared to some they have had on.
Fr this guy was great. Much respect and appreciate the work he puts in
I was born in 88, and after school, I would play basketball and skateboard with random kids. Now, even parents stay inside and play video games. There's a HUGE number of millennials and younger people who work and play video games. Add porn on phones and trifecta.
I'm glad you brought up the p*** point. It's another barrier to not pursue physical intimacy, if you can please* yourself. And it's free...
being alone is awesome.. all i need is my pc and my video/game library/ebook library. i dont even need the internet, i have acquired so much over the years.. my guitar/ amp,my cats and some weed and im very content with being alone
fyi.. being alone is not the same as being lonely.. there is a huge difference... i stay isolated by choice and because i have no choice. both are true
Especially the cat. They're such good company.
@@azalia423 indeed.. i have 3.. 14 yr old and 2 kittens of maybe 6 months or so
@ Oh, so delightful! My 7 yo is curled up nearby.
It's not peaceful when you're old, childless, alone, and future cat food
@@peterroberts4415 how old do you think i am?
im at peace more than at anytime in my 5.5 decades of living and im not childless.. i have 2
I'm not lonely. I'm just not that into other people.
He speaking to those who absolutely can not enjoy life without the company of others.
He leaves out this also applies to the masses who subscribe to group think as well and have sheep mentality.
I'm both introverted and extroverted, the past four years of witnessing how willing others are to deliberately spread their disease has made me hyper aware of obnoxious behaviors and behaviors that contradict my health and well-being. I never realized how much I enjoy not having someone breath in my face.
I work three jobs, seven days a week, nine to thirteen hours a day, and I'm still struggling. No time, or money to socialize.
Decline or church attendance is a big one. My 95 year old grandpa was not a very religious man, but he said he liked going because his friends were there and they’d chat after, while the wives would do the same, this was rural Illinois until the 90s he said.
there are no common spaces anymore, especially ones that cost little or no money. you need a car to get anywhere in 95% of the country and have to pay at every possible turn to do anything
Loneliness. Obsessive, circular ideation. Depression. Disappearing from friends and family.
This is the road to tragedy.
Not if friends and family are the tragedy
@@Shawn3002 Fortunately, there are other counselors out there who can help. Mental health hotline might be someone's first step.
Lmao 🤣 no it’s not
Goddamn the cope of the crying face is so fucking sad its crazy. I really feel so bad for so many ppl on a daily basis over using those emoji’s like damn life really has gotta be rough for mfrs n mfrs really gotta be on the verge of tears at all times
Social isolation benefits the ruling class always.
Socializing is quite often an expensive endeavor these days. To everyone saying you can just go out for free, it doesn't have to cost money, etc. It can be very difficult to find individuals in a social circle who hold the same frugal habits as you. The average American isn't famous for their responsible spending habits. Usually when people invite you to hang out, it is likely going to cost money. If you suggest a "free" alternative, you're likely just going to end up alone. I know the response here will be "oh well just find different/better friends". Yes, thank you in advance for being totally unhelpful lol
Honestly 😅 when I did hangout, my friends hated doing free stuff with me. Aka Nature activities, working out, art... they all wanted to club, bar, go downtown, malls etc.
I'm relieved that I live in a major city that has decent public transportation options, and that I'm able to walk to my friends. A big part of the problem in modern American life is the suburban sprawl in which so many people live.
It might seem nitpicky but can we call it being asocial not being antisocial? People dont seem to understand antisocial refers to violent, psychopathic, maciavellian, remorseless people who like hurting others. Asocial just refers to not wanting or not being social. I think this misuse leads to a lot of negative stigma and misunderstanding
This mis naming has been a pet peeve for years and years
Thank you! People make that mistake so often.
I think it impacts introverts and extroverts differently. I''m an introvert who plays games with my friends in the evenings and boardgames a couple of times a month. Nothing has really changed. Now, extroverts have the need to interact with people in person. At least more than introverts.
I don't feel "alone", if anything I'm a social-seeming, people liking, introvert. I constantly feel guilty I'm not hanging out with friends more, but I just feel like I don't have the money or the time like I used to.
I was an only child and grew up like this, playing by myself, and I loved it. I feel like I truly need this time more than other people. maybe the fact that families are smaller like this increases this too? anyways, my friends constantly beg me to hang out, and of course I do, but I always feel soooo burnt out socially. my job is super social where I speak to strangers about intimate details of their life/career/finances and their goals. I come home and all I want to do is just completely unplug and focus on myself. for me, I think the stress of nowadays has made me need even more alone time to recharge. I've always loved alone time... but I've never felt THIS much like I need alone time or I will just scream or have a breakdown. what is this about? I just constantly feel like I'm not doing enough, not hanging out with friends enough, not talking to them enough... it's an endless cycle and makes me wanna shut off even more. I've also completely given up on social media because it just stresses me out now instead of bringing me any joy.
I feel like every problem in the US is a result of horrible urban planning which encourages isolation from neighbours and dependency on the car. Which I feel is a result of the US having a too extreme culture of individuality.
Socializing cost money. There was a yoga class i went to once but she shut up it down bc the rent became too high. Not mention people didnt come on a regular basis
It’s not hard to figure out…..if there is literally no public space and you can’t afford anything…….
Can confirm: i live in NYC, but i spent a lot of time in Alaska. They disagree, boy do they disagree (a strange mix of millenial Christians and "crunchy" West Coast sorts, and much else, including slickers from NYC), but they won't turn their backs on each other. Never ever. That was really the true taboo. It was a "bush" community, and there was a distinct possibility one day your life might depend on one of them. Refreshing, really.
I moved a lot as a kid and whenever I moved, I lost loads of friendships because even back in the “good old days” proximity was everything. Moved away from home for my first career job. Tried very hard to connect with people but they’d agree to meet, then flake out. After the 9th person to flake on me, I just learned to occupy myself. This was in 2008. When Covid hit, I had already been there done that with isolation enough times. In most of my friendships I’d have to do all the initiating. People don’t want to reciprocate. It’s a lot of effort.
Now my social group is small and only includes those that do take the time to share the work. But ultimately, I would rather rely on myself for happiness than external forces I can’t control.
I used to live in a more working class part of my city, and I would see kids out in the street playing sports or riding bikes all the time. Now I live in a more upper middle class area and I never see kids out playing.
I literally had to become sober because I couldn’t afford going out. I think it’s hampered a lot of social development for me. So much of our culture is about going out and I’m boxed out of that cus I’m too poor.
The thing is being alone is better than being with people at least for me
copium is what i smell here
@@arihia45 I've intentionally gone out of my way to be alone by choice not because I've been forced to.
@@yaneznayoui1597 then you're not the intended subject on a discussion about "the loneliness crisis."
@@arihia45I’m someone who is by nature extremely social.
People are not good at being social. They are not really good, at all.
If one is supremely pro-social…..
One is often alone. You can’t be pro-social and enjoy the company of the anti-social. That’s not how it works.
@@nataliaalfonso2662 I can’t imagine how a person in the middle of typing out a paragraph essentially saying: “I’m not the problem, it’s everyone else” doesn’t pause and do a little self reflection
Dating is 100% impossible in the social media era. I have come to grips with the fact that I will be single forever and I'm actually OK with after my last GF's were just so terrible.
Dating has become a hellscape too. With each year, just getting a date every few weeks or so is an achievement when it used to be you could open an app like Tinder back in 2015 and have several dates in a single week. Everyone just seems vacant and anxious. Something is definitely wrong and it's getting worse with each year that goes by.
Face it, you aren’t seen as “attractive” as you were back then because 90% of them are trying to match with 10% of us. The catalogue has grown and the top 10% of us are having their heyday. Who knew impersonalizing dating and making it all about a 15 second advertisement would destroy dating?
This isn’t a bad thing. Only extroverts care. Us introverts are glad people are finally leaving us alone.
Everyone has to work all damn day and still not have money to go out. This economy is not working for the worker.
I'm 41. I think it's important to note that it's very hard as an adult to just "hang out" now. Work schedules are a major hindrance to that in my life and money is another. After buying groceries I and my friends don't have a lot of money to spent and I don't hear this guy or many like him speaking to these realties.
I enjoy my time alone 😂
Me too, is spending time alone really that bad?
@ I mean I have my
Family what else do I need
@@tiffanyjones14 It's not good for you.
The technology angle is a good one (though economics is also clearly at play). The book “In the Absence of the Sacred” makes a good critique of the way tech has separated us. The most poignant example was the author noting that growing up in the 50s, no one had a tv, and neighbors talked all the time, hanging out on their porches. Then one person in the neighborhood got a tv, and everyone hung out there to watch it. Then everyone got a tv, and no one talked anymore. Just like that: blind consumerism got us trapped in antisocial patterns. It’s a much much bigger problem than we like to acknowledge or even talk about.
Just like everything else, socializing is expensive. When you're struggling to pay rent, going out to dinner isn't an option.
Meh. Ending up alone was something I worried about as a teenager but now that I'm past my teens/20s I genuinely prefer to be alone. I don't have to wear a mask to pretend to be something I'm not and there's so much less drama.
I'm alone but I am not lonely.
Dungeons and Dragons players are the only people that hang out with friends on a regular basis.
Don't feel like taking the risk of getting shot at a movie theater or grocery store not to mention it's too expensive to do anything 🤷🏾♂️
i have a theory that the more energy a society produces the more lonely they get. and soon the entire planet will produce massive amounts of energy. maybe hyper technologically leads to loneliness
I am alone. We are all alone. But i am not lonesome. Im not lonely. Im my own best friend. Having friends over is just gravy. Im the meal.
We? I’m not alone.
When your shitty job demands 24/7 availability, its hard to do anything
I love being alone and I'm proud of it
Wow, can’t believe they didn’t mention the role money plays in keeping people isolated, everything cost money that people don’t have
As an introvert, I’m good inside and away from people.
As an introvert, I hate to inform you that you're wrong.
Yes, I know what you mean.
they act like being alone is a sin, yet they dont ever want to talk about anything that matters or what we care about
@ So true. Very tiring.
I like to be alone. No drama.
Great time to be an INTJ honestly
That's me. Record isolation? I haven't noticed.😂
We’re only a handful out of 100. What about the others? It is deeply unhealthy for them. These sick people will lead to a sick society. Isolation destroys them!
INTP and I think its great.
So many people being too poor to socialize has forced them into isolation.
Isolation has forced them into thinking.
Thinking has forced them into questioning why they are so poor and who created these conditions.
It's going pretty well tbh. People are starting to notice.
Probably depends on your gender.
INFJ, and of course I like to find the million reasons that have caused this and rage against all of them 😂
I’m not alone I’m chillin 😎 I don’t have time for other peoples negative energy or bullshit rather stay to my self.
Missing from this conversation is the fact that everytime you leave the house you risk spending a lot of money. Restaurants and all forms of public entertainment are very expensive and staying at home has the double reward of being comforting and cost effecticve.
Leave us introverts alone!! 😂
LOL exactly
I know right! If I need human interaction that’s what the comment section is for. I like my alone time.
I’m a true loner and always have been - but I truly feel better when I spend time with friends at least 1x per week otherwise I just get weird and forget how to interact with humans lol
I'm introverted and this guy is absolutely right. You should listen to him.
@@jennathumbledore1282 Did you just say the comment section is "human interaction."
I’ve lived alone for 10 years now and I don’t miss being around people at all. Oh I see people when I’m walking my dog,but live the life I want to.
I like how Krystal tries to jump into left vs right TDS garbage and this guy just dunks on her like a child.
lol I caught that too. Right away, but this guy had said this about culture! Let me twist your position/studies to fit my world view now!
It lives in her head
dumb that you like it, children teaching children.
No, she just asked a question probably multiple viewers were thinking about, and he answered it very well. It’s interesting how well your comment reflects the general social attitudes they were talking about in the video.
Dude the fact that you even used "TDS" to refer to her is showing that you're apart of the problem that this guy was talking about.
You're so invested into a politicaI figure that you're using made up online terms like "TDS" to insult people that don't like him. Which is showing that you're trapped in some chronically online echo chamber that cheers on the guy 24/7.
He doesn't even know who you are bro, and he doesn't even care who you are either. You're a grown man so start acting like it and stop constantly following behind another grown man.
Loneliness is underrated. Think Buddha, Miyamoto Musashi, Zhang Daoling, Hawthorne, Proust, Hemingway, Orwell, Thoreau, and Yoda alone on planet Dagobah ...
Everyone is different. Some people need more social interaction than others. For some people who tend to absorb other people’s energy being away from people is more healthy then being around them
If people start socializing again, they’ll stop watching UA-cam and the channel will shut down
This is why the military was great for community. Unfortunately, loneliness or disconnect is also why Veteran suicide is high. Loss of tribe/community.
Sadly true
It could be because of all the innocents they killed to satisfy Uncle Sam's thirst for blood.
@@thewirah1 if that was right? Is the reason why loneliness is happening and civilian suicides have skyrocketed, and people feel nothing due to partaking in slave labor by participating in capitalism vs homestead centric?
It's harder to herd people when they're not listening.
Everything has gotten prohibitively expensive for the average person. Everything increased from food, transportation, insurance costs, energy, housing etc. etc. A night the movies for two used to run one 30-40 bucks, now you need 60. Dinners anywhere nowadays for two is $70+. Don’t get me started on every single place asking and prompting tips. Consumers are getting squeezed left right and center. A lot of people see it for what it is, the moment you set foot outside of your home, your pockets start bleeding money, more and more people are staying home as much as possible. Not to say that they don’t get to us there, because they do, online shopping, streaming services, other subscriptions, etc etc.
How can no one mention social media is a big issue here. People are stuck to the phone
wtf has time to socialize and build friendships? Both my wife and I are gainfully employed professionals with two school aged kids. Between work, kids, and maintaining a home, I don't have the time or energy for anything. Life is a series of shoe-horning things in between daily requirements. I miss music, art, reading, hanging out, etc.
So much of the corporate model involves taking jobs wherever they may be. You have to have a corporate job to get a loan or buy a house or get health insurance so people will move away from family and friends to get said job and then realize that they’re miserable with no friends or no network. You then build the network but there are very few internal promotions in corporate America so then you have leave the company and your network you built to get the promotion. We all now live shoulder to shoulder and have no friends… isn’t it great?!?
Since a few people are getting married compared to historical standards, I think many like myself decided that if we aren’t going to get married and pursue a spouse, why should I go waste money doing outside activities that I don’t find worth the trouble?
12:57 This closing answer is very insightful and very well said by the guest.
I isolate because people like me best that way.
People gaining weight directly correlates with them not going out as much. The flab.
You know what els would hep people to start to come out and start living again? Is if they could afford anything more than rent, utilities and a cellphone payment.
This is why the pet population has increased. People would rather be with their pets than humans.
It is hard to find people who don't believe in absolute nonsense. I don't do social media, it is a scam by corporations.
I move often due to jobs being unstable. People don't want to hang out anymore. I hang out with my one friend and he is still drawn to being on his phone. I can be talking to him and he checks his phone. I have thought about just walking away from him as well.
Modern adults don't understand their own choices, it is pathetic.
This all makes sense and there are multiple factors for the cause in totality. Financial is #2 but in my opinion it was the phones and social media starting in 2011-2012. Literally destroyed the social fabric of society.
Living near a town of 30ish people and maybe 150 people on the outskirts,its the pub with friends on Thursday and breakfast Sunday morning. Grabge one week. Bunco the following. Yoga every Tuesday night. Started walking with friends because there is a wolf in the area. There are cheap and free things to do everywhere.
I was so jealous during the pandemic of people in small towns.