"If a girl fails high school in Australia, she still gets a happy ending. If a girl fails high school in Asia, she has to GIVE happy endings." Damn. I'm not sure to laugh at that one because that is not far from the unfortunate truth.
Darth Bomber yeah just for comparison, that was a 2U Advanced Mathematics class. At a selective school, a 3U extension of advanced mathematics class is the lowest class there is
@Dragon Dimosthenis But,a car mechanic will follow the steps like a robot but cannot put his creativity without knowing any physics where maths is required!😊
@@tommyeyers white kids in selective schools either learn to avoid maths or a tiny minority are just brilliant at it (as with any other race). If you think all asians are naturally brilliant at maths then explain the coaching colleges.
@@davidwillis7991 Maths like any other skill can be learnt by repetitive practice. and it is built layer by layer. No point learning trig if you have not learnt and understood angles. Aussie syllabus is conceptual learning not practice. Sort of like learning how to kick a footy - you need to kick it a million times to get good at it.
@@tommyeyers I can say as a white kid a selective school I am much better then most and I don’t go to one of those selective schools that are just normal schools with what is effectively just a title
Was in year 6 and in Sydney. Did a selective test so I could get into my old dream-high school, which was Sydney Technical High School. Didn't got the marks need. I was under. By 2 marks. I cried. Am now in year 11... and this test still somehow haunts me.
Parramatta high school is like 75% indian, 20% East Asian, 4% middle eastern and 1% other. I'm not exaggerating. There's 4 white kids in my 180 student year group.
I was in public high school, but i took a college elective there, psychology. Noone there was anything but asian We took a stress survey in the psychologu class, where we get a score on how stressful our life is. 0-50 is stressless. 50-100 is tense and in need of vacation. Anything above 150 is suicidal. Everyone in the class scored above 200. Some including me scored about 350, one scored about 500. But the whole class felt alright and not suicidal (i think). it was the beginning of the semester when the workload is the least. But my teacher said "remember this is AMERCAN psychology. That means these results will only apply if youre white. "
I just realised I answered all of the questions Neel gave to the audience because if I made any mistakes I had my parents to deal with at home during report time.
If you're wondering what happens to boys who fail school, does "hello sir I'm calling from microsoft technical department because your computer has a virus... " sound familiar?
Ive never really noticed youre australian haha Guys can we tone down the argument on this comment, I meant to say I've never noticed this guys Australian accent, not that he is Australian
@Deborah Meltrozo You are saying indians and australians are completely different species? Insane lowlifes like you are the reason libtards are in power ffs
@Deborah Meltrozo yes and if u are white and think only u r Australian, I pity your peanut sized brain. You know what are you? You're not original to the land, but a grandchild of a British criminal exiled/jailed during colonial times. Australia, the British Gauntanmo bay of those days. Your ancestry to the land is not older than 100 years.. So yeah get enlightened..
Wym "reality they dont usually care about"? It's because that reality doesnt exist, not that "we don't care about it". If anything we care more than he does because we care about everyone and seeking truth of individuals based on character, not these cheesy played out bits of "all X does Y". That's the entire point - making people realise that race and culture is so much more nuanced, varied, complex and _irrelevant to character_ than the over simplified tropes he keeps sustaining with sets like this. Genuinely couldn't be less counter productive if those are his supposed goals in comedy. Think about it: he's playing out the same tired old cliché stereotypes we all grew up with in school. But they were only funny for racist kids and bullies back then, and they're only funny for racists and bullies now. Did you hear the story about the Asian student who almost took his life because of the pressure on him to perform academically and excel at math? The dude almost DIED cause people insisted "you're Asian, you MUST be smart at X" and it screwed him up so bad that he went to such dark places as that. It was really frustrating to read his experiences of people who would insist that he was wrong about his own mind because they knew better - they knew the "reality" that all Asians are academically gifted, he was just being Asian wrong. It's infuriating. Then you watch this has-been make some shit crude joke about "Asian girls giving happy endings by calculating them cause Asians do math" and it's just embarrassing to even be associated with Australian comedy if this is what's being broadcast. Whats depressing is hundreds of people are the same as you, singing praise of his fkn.. 'top S tier comedy' - so controversial and thought provoking. So avant-garde in how he lazily slaps fat labels on swathes of the population for the sake of a few cheap knob gags and a mediocre laugh from *some* dudes and like 4 girls. 🙄 What a no talent hack and the day to day speaks for itself- his career is and has been as dead as his forgettable stage presence for years now. It's entirely his own doing that he's gone nowhere and he deserves it for being a such a sanctimonious and virtue signalling try hard.
Shittiest thing about selective schools were the parents, Asian and white alike, though it was moreso the Asian parents for us. I had Asian parents accusing me of copying off of their kids until they pulled me out of a test once to find out it was the girl next to me copying off of me. Her mom liked to pay the school so her daughter would get some made up award. Her mom and a few others would misplace my food slips at lunch so I wouldn't have anything to eat. Jesus christ what a nightmare. The moms and the PTA are where the true evil is at. They would rather their children compete than learn.
The Boss, Mr Hoskin, would not approve of this. He was the creator of James Ruse. Named it so due to our Cornish heritage, as Ruse was a Cornish wool farmer.
"Mary Zheng from James Ruse doesn't get stressed, she gets RESULTS."
I'm in tears lmao. 😂😂😂
hahahahaha fucking same
I feel this
literally me 😭
I went to the same selective school as Neel (Caringbah High). Dude's left a legendary legacy.
wtf for real? i didnt know he went there i go to caringbah rn
Do the teachers know him?
Lauren Song yep just leaks where he went nice one
Lol, thought the kog dog would have gone to Sydney Tech.
@@workout9594 lmao it's not a secret, you can find his old high school videos on his channel. chill.
2:03 so happy to see Daniel Radcliffe at the show
loooool
And I guess he went to selective school too.
Hogwarts is a selective school loll
Forget Daniel Radcliffe... did you not notice fucking Taylor Swift at 1:39???
@@chesscomsupport8689 😂😂
As an islander that somehow made it into selective I can confirm I only went because it was full of food.
I go to a selective school. I can confirm everything he says is correct.
Nightcor EDM I graduated from one last year, it’s all absolutely true
@@pauliewalnuts5605 Who's off?
Yep started last term, definitely true.
I failed my selective schools test
Which one
"If a girl fails high school in Australia, she still gets a happy ending. If a girl fails high school in Asia, she has to GIVE happy endings."
Damn. I'm not sure to laugh at that one because that is not far from the unfortunate truth.
I don't get that, what does it mean by "give happy endings"
@@mohammedyakub3760 they have to be prostitutes to make a living it they don't get a proper jobs
@@mohammedyakub3760 During sex, it's a common slang for men to "finish"; Ejacculate. And well you can relate what a happy "ending" is.
@Whats in THE name lol
@@mohammedyakub3760 When a massage ends with you receiving a handjob, blowjob, or fucking the masseuse.
>be me Indian, can't understand what a selective school is
>tfw he explains what it is.
>tfw realize every school in India is a selective school.
This hit me like a truck * *cries* *
Lol uh NO wtf it's not shut up
True
That’s not what a selective school is, you don’t understand. India is bad
🤣
Haha that equation part killed me 😂
Have some curry and your username might change to "motivation"
"white kids need to toughen up" Lol I was the only white kid in my calculus class.
Darth Bomber yeah just for comparison, that was a 2U Advanced Mathematics class. At a selective school, a 3U extension of advanced mathematics class is the lowest class there is
Sounds like you toughened up
@@oigomieggo24 Thanks man
@Dragon Dimosthenis From what I heard math is really useful in tech and bio as well.
@Dragon Dimosthenis But,a car mechanic will follow the steps like a robot but cannot put his creativity without knowing any physics where maths is required!😊
Neel focus on this channel. You will get to 1 million by this year.
Tom Martin ok doc.
@@draglout it really didnt
Saw him live at MQU, his delivery was on point
What happened to all the Chinese and Indian kids? The islander kids ate them at half time! Hahahaha lol 😂
What was the joke here ?
@@dennismob7573 Most athletes at high schools are Islander kids
@@ijimesan71 ohh
@@ijimesan71 well, most rugby players definitely
Thank you for calling us Islanders n not Fobs fr... yeh we pre big
I got into Sydney Girls High School this year and my mum was like 'i aPpLiED yOU fOr fUCKiNG jAmEs RuSe'
Oml I got into fort street lmao
i got into hurlstone, couldve gone to sydney bois but too far away
omgg i wish i got into the sydney ones, im stuck in penrith 💀
I go Sefton 😅
@@hanhpham6628 Is Sefton good
oof i was a white kid in a selective Australian high school and when i got there it was amazing to know i was actually good at sports :)
Jordyn what about the maths
@@tommyeyers white kids in selective schools either learn to avoid maths or a tiny minority are just brilliant at it (as with any other race). If you think all asians are naturally brilliant at maths then explain the coaching colleges.
@@davidwillis7991 Maths like any other skill can be learnt by repetitive practice. and it is built layer by layer. No point learning trig if you have not learnt and understood angles. Aussie syllabus is conceptual learning not practice. Sort of like learning how to kick a footy - you need to kick it a million times to get good at it.
@@tommyeyers I can say as a white kid a selective school I am much better then most and I don’t go to one of those selective schools that are just normal schools with what is effectively just a title
Was in year 6 and in Sydney. Did a selective test so I could get into my old dream-high school, which was Sydney Technical High School. Didn't got the marks need. I was under. By 2 marks. I cried. Am now in year 11... and this test still somehow haunts me.
Neel's getting better in every other video, we need full length videos Kneellllllll
Harsh AL bloody couldn't agree more
Man, do you have some premium content somewhere, I would pay to watch it.
@Class 10 Science 😂😂
@Class 10 Science 😂😂
"She needs Mr. And Mrs. Patel"
I'm rolling with laughter lmao
2 hours of studying in a day would be a dream come true for me
Always wanted to go to a Selective School!😃😁
You're getting better all the time mate. Can't wait to catch one of your shows!
as someone who went to high school in both SEAsia and Australia, this is too accurate LOL 😂😂
I feel so guilty that as an Indian kid I didnt clear the selective test. I tried twice and didnt clear both times. Rip 😢😢😢
@@beerus553 like i have choice
@@helpthehippiehottie Thank you
Singh Anmol preet no worries my good citizen
@@helpthehippiehottie How tf do you slip on a brick? This is why you didn't get accepted into a selective school
@@helpthehippiehottie good immigrant*
q: what do you call the minority group in penrith selective high school?
a: white kids.
Answer is Asian kids. Because all of them are in James Ruse
Parramatta high school is like 75% indian, 20% East Asian, 4% middle eastern and 1% other. I'm not exaggerating. There's 4 white kids in my 180 student year group.
Went to Penrith high last year and gotta agree with you on that one lmao
broo high key there’s like ten white ppl in my grade, all the asians r in girra and baulko coz penrith is just a backup option :,)
@@par7aspd835 no surprises there.
I was in public high school, but i took a college elective there, psychology. Noone there was anything but asian
We took a stress survey in the psychologu class, where we get a score on how stressful our life is. 0-50 is stressless. 50-100 is tense and in need of vacation. Anything above 150 is suicidal.
Everyone in the class scored above 200. Some including me scored about 350, one scored about 500.
But the whole class felt alright and not suicidal (i think). it was the beginning of the semester when the workload is the least.
But my teacher said "remember this is AMERCAN psychology. That means these results will only apply if youre white. "
Hahahahaha
You develop a superiority complex. From being better than public school students
And an expectation/sense of entitlement for a good job
Jaws hurt from consistent laughter
I moved up from community to selective and what I can say is that I have escaped the drop kicks and lebs.
I go to Sydney Tech and a lot of people there are really social and athletic as well
raifu Senpai Oi come to Sydney boys
He's a comedian.
I just realised I answered all of the questions Neel gave to the audience because if I made any mistakes I had my parents to deal with at home during report time.
That mum impression is actually god-like
you soo dope love from INDIA ❤️❤️💯💯💯💯
If you're wondering what happens to boys who fail school, does "hello sir I'm calling from microsoft technical department because your computer has a virus... " sound familiar?
The outro reminded me of Kenneth "Kenny" Sebastian :3
This so accurate🤣
Damn my social skills suck!
They definitely don't do that in Europa schools there the minimum is 16 hours study (requirement is multiple languages)
neel kolhaktar bro u went to caringbah high school right
dude
me too im year 9 rn
im in caringbah high school as well broooo das so cool
Ive never really noticed youre australian haha
Guys can we tone down the argument on this comment, I meant to say I've never noticed this guys Australian accent, not that he is Australian
@Deborah Meltrozo but he is
@Deborah Meltrozo he was born in Australia and his lived his entire life in Australia
@Deborah Meltrozo You are saying indians and australians are completely different species? Insane lowlifes like you are the reason libtards are in power ffs
@Deborah Meltrozo yes and if u are white and think only u r Australian, I pity your peanut sized brain. You know what are you? You're not original to the land, but a grandchild of a British criminal exiled/jailed during colonial times. Australia, the British Gauntanmo bay of those days. Your ancestry to the land is not older than 100 years.. So yeah get enlightened..
@Deborah Meltrozo you just made an analogy that a hamster in a fish bowl is a *fish*
you dumb fuck, that is exactly what you said
I love the way He provokes the audience, i can see He loves to push them. Forces to see a reality they dont usually care about.
Wym "reality they dont usually care about"? It's because that reality doesnt exist, not that "we don't care about it". If anything we care more than he does because we care about everyone and seeking truth of individuals based on character, not these cheesy played out bits of "all X does Y". That's the entire point - making people realise that race and culture is so much more nuanced, varied, complex and _irrelevant to character_ than the over simplified tropes he keeps sustaining with sets like this. Genuinely couldn't be less counter productive if those are his supposed goals in comedy.
Think about it: he's playing out the same tired old cliché stereotypes we all grew up with in school. But they were only funny for racist kids and bullies back then, and they're only funny for racists and bullies now.
Did you hear the story about the Asian student who almost took his life because of the pressure on him to perform academically and excel at math? The dude almost DIED cause people insisted "you're Asian, you MUST be smart at X" and it screwed him up so bad that he went to such dark places as that. It was really frustrating to read his experiences of people who would insist that he was wrong about his own mind because they knew better - they knew the "reality" that all Asians are academically gifted, he was just being Asian wrong. It's infuriating.
Then you watch this has-been make some shit crude joke about "Asian girls giving happy endings by calculating them cause Asians do math" and it's just embarrassing to even be associated with Australian comedy if this is what's being broadcast. Whats depressing is hundreds of people are the same as you, singing praise of his fkn.. 'top S tier comedy' - so controversial and thought provoking. So avant-garde in how he lazily slaps fat labels on swathes of the population for the sake of a few cheap knob gags and a mediocre laugh from *some* dudes and like 4 girls. 🙄
What a no talent hack and the day to day speaks for itself- his career is and has been as dead as his forgettable stage presence for years now. It's entirely his own doing that he's gone nowhere and he deserves it for being a such a sanctimonious and virtue signalling try hard.
Where's the full show?
*Modern Educayshun*
I've failed to get into a selective school too much!
1:08 OMG SO FKN TRUE LOL
Here I am still wondering, in 2019, why he's got a wired microphone
Holy shit I didn't know he lives in Sydney! Which school did he go to?
Caringbah 👍🏻👍🏻
Yes neel reaching a bigger audience I see
omg ming i see u AHAHAH
@@shelleywang523 WATTTT HELLO FRIEND
Is that daniel radcliffe in the front row?
I'm fine thanks, don't need anything. I appreciate the shout out though!!!
WHAT SCHOOL YOU GET???
I tried to get into Melbourne High last year, it’s aids. Half the school got in by fluke
Shittiest thing about selective schools were the parents, Asian and white alike, though it was moreso the Asian parents for us. I had Asian parents accusing me of copying off of their kids until they pulled me out of a test once to find out it was the girl next to me copying off of me. Her mom liked to pay the school so her daughter would get some made up award. Her mom and a few others would misplace my food slips at lunch so I wouldn't have anything to eat. Jesus christ what a nightmare. The moms and the PTA are where the true evil is at. They would rather their children compete than learn.
#objectifyneel
2 hours of study legit a holiday
so which school did you go to?
I CRAVE TWO HOURS A DAY PLEASE
I get 0. Ha
i tried to get into selective because of my parents and i didnt get accepted
Went to selective school can confirm
How did the best joke in the set get a groan?
Public in the US sense or the UK sense?
US
The Boss, Mr Hoskin, would not approve of this. He was the creator of James Ruse. Named it so due to our Cornish heritage, as Ruse was a Cornish wool farmer.
I got into Girraween High School this year with 226/300
Congrats!
Is Selective schools a Victorian thing?
1:08 yeah that's damn right...🤣🤣🤣🤣
I shouldn’t watch this while I have covid it hurts to laugh
What school did U go to?
Hasn't replied in a year ffs
I am in Sydney Grammar school its a good school to start of to opportunity classes😏😏😏
This guy is a genius.
Omg I relate to this so hard!
Wow I l love him 🤣🤣
Harry Potter in the front row
james ruse agricultural high school top in the HSC for 23 years is where i go
fLeX
Don Kun bruh Hurlstone for days ✊✊😂
F in chat for sefton
God of Destruction hey at least they didn’t 20 places in the hsc rankings!
I go to a selective school and it’s completely fine
(I haven’t watched the vid yet)
I got into one called Suzanne Cory High School
Apparently everyone in this comment section works at nasa
Caringbah High represent 😂😂🔥🔥
smart!
Wow. Just wow.
0:47 look at the angry Harry Potter in the front row 😂
Eat this curry you'll shit the anxiety right out!
I certify, this is a real tip! Try it out..
anyone giving jee this year?
Care to explain how people give happy endings anyone?
Fkn PTSD from reading the title.
Is that harry potter in the front row seat?
I could’ve made Caringbah High, but was stupid enough to put down bloody Chatswood ( I got 216.25)
respect the tech
i wwent to a slecetive school in vic 😭😭
Oh hes literally a comedian I didnt known that
Youre a very good comedian
that equation though
brilliant!
Melbourne highhhhhhhhh!
Collab with Jamie jhu please
@Neel Kolhatkar Good shit
WHO ELSE GOES TO JAMES AGRICULTURE
Kid's magic....
I went to a selective school.........it was interesting.
Fuck that equation made sense to me....
Very carlinesque delivery
new favorite lmaoooo
0:52 did anyone else see Harry Potter in the front row there