If you liked this hard-to-make video, consider checking out our PATREON: www.patreon.com/drjordanbreeding or channel memberships! ua-cam.com/channels/UfeQmlNZVQdzjiFBSwjOrQ.htmljoin . They’re identical in all the ways that matter *winks slowly and knowingly and vampire-like*.
"she thought she died and like, came to take her gamecube" Pretty much literally happened to me. Lived with my mom, she died, landlord and his kids drop in, i'm like 'no, someone's still here', and the kids had already taken my gamecube.
My favorite part of Twilight is Bella going "omg, Jacob, you're basically a baby and way too young for me" with their two year age gap. Ma'am, your boyfriend died during WWI.
You single handedly became the face of Cracked while being just as funny as the original people, you kick ass Breeding! Plus you're dedication to this awesome format actually feels fresh which is so rare these days on YT. Not only that you engage with your audience and always did even on Cracked, we've had many back and forths over the time you've been doimg this, it's awesome, we all just think you deserve a bigger audience for your efforts! If you get the chance to sell out, do it and tell em Zak sent you! 🤣
Haven't watched the video. Commenting for engagement. Gonna let it run in while i do chores so google thinks that I watched the ads, then come back and re-watch it "Ad free." I'm clever.
I had no idea such a clever trick exists! So you just let it end all the way, then press replay? Or manually move the little cursor thingy back to the beginning?
What I was hoping throughout the whole series was that when Jacob's grandfather turned into a wolf his wheelchair would turn into a doggie wheel chair. All the Oscars for Twilight if it had done that.
This may be a little deep for a UA-cam comment but I lost my best friend almost 2 weeks ago now. The guy I started this channel with, my GoldenEye friend, my Dave. I've been understandably off since but sitting down and watching this video after work last night was the first time I was genuinely cracking up laughing again consistently since he passed. Watching your stuff reminds me of hanging out and riffing with my now gone best friend and THAT is why I love your stuff so much sir. Please keep up the amazing work.
Had a surreal experience. A 5-second commercial popped up at exactly the moment you’d normally do a cutaway gag and it took the whole commercial to realize it wasn’t intentional. For the record, it was a possibly sparkly vampire in the sun moment cutting to the commercial that goes “light it up!” and then a sax solo. It’s a weird way to say I enjoy your cutaway jokes but cannot predict them.
Every time I think of Twilight, I'm reminded of a Wattpad retelling I read a few years ago, where Charlie is Italian, Bella goes to see SmackDown in Phoenix, and later makes friends with CM Punk, there's a cameo of Stephanie Meyer, the La Push girls have their own werewolf pack (and also a D&D group), and the Undertaker kills a vampire with a scythe.
@aint2proud2meg lol! Yes, they have to stop to count the corn, or pins or whatever other small, numerous, objects you drop in front of them. Giving you time to escape
If you did a follow-up video where you discussed the several legal ways the vampires and werewolves would get screwed over in the modern day. Trail cameras, social security numbers, it's a gold mine.
Trail cameras: super human senses, smell hearing etc. Electronic device emit a high pitch while or some kind of noise outside of most human hearing range. Social security numbers: often they have dominate, or the ability to just hypnotise and command people into whatever and leave them with no memory of it. Or there's the Skyrim solution of unaliving someone and now your them. Yeah lots of issues to be sure but easier than you think
From the jokes, the sound bites, the music references, the Dave convos, the callbacks, & overall production this video is a 10/10 & surely up there with Beernado for me. Keep doing your thing bro
Dave kidnapped my family AGAIN! and said if I didn't watch, like and comment, he would force them into life long servitude as your channel editors. So here I am, enjoying myself for them.
@@Drjordanbreeding It was awesome; but how did you get through that entire video without even once poking at the author’s Mormon background being the driving force behind Edward’s staunch refusal to do the naughties with her until she turned 18 and they could get married?
Love that editor call out. your videos are really funny and well done. I never had any interest in this movie series but for you I'd watch a video about anything. Keep up the great work.
Wow, thanks! Yeah every video is usually divvied up between several of us, although this one was mostly me (except the first section was mostly Bryan!)
Dammit, DJB, that's another set of movies you've saved me the trouble of watching! They looked positively grueling to sit through, much less edit, so my hat's off once for the effort and once again for the jokes. Oh, and one more hats-off for the sneaky Cat-Stevens-via-Sheryl-Crow clip. Thanks!
As someone who unfortunately read the books as a teen before realizing how weird they were, I really needed you tearing these movies apart Feels like therapy in the best of ways
@@Drjordanbreeding Here's hoping Casper makes an appearance in the review and the prophecy is fulfilled! P.S. Great job on the intro and theme song. Short and sweet motifs getting right to the point but identifiable enough. Really digging it.
All hail our robot (algorithm) overlords! God, dude, these videos rip. I keep coming back to 'em. I've been watching (both these and the other ones on... another channel, ...somewhere...) basically on repeat for like, the last three months. Idk what it is, but your videos make me really happy, Doctor. You're crushing it, I honestly don't look forward to any other channel releases nearly as much. UA-cam may think it's weird, but it really does it for me, so hopefully keep crankin' em out, and I'll 110% keep watching (seriously, I can't stop)
Seems like the baseball scene and the giant fight scene are the only two enjoyable bits of this franchise, yet they're spaced out at either ends of the whole thing You can't tell me they didn't do that on purpose
"are they always like this?" "It's getting worse with old age" with the name tags made me cackle out loud, and it's only five minutes into the video. This is gonna be a good ride.
I left a kind of harsh criticism on another video about the frenetic nature and difficulty to follow the through line, this video is that criticism destroyed, it's way tighter, you say more with less words which keeps the scripting super tight, it's point, joke point, cutaway all on the same through line, you never miss the overall point or lose track of what's going on. I know this kind of editing is very labor intensive but everything flows so well in a straight line, rather than the individual pieces taking away from the whole they all contribute, rather than it being hard to stay engaged it's the opposite, it sucks you and engages you. It's so good. Edit: My new criticism is continuity, the light changes quite a bit during the filming, just letting you know
I'm disappointed that you didn't make the connection between this series and the film "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Jasper was turned into a vampire during the civil war and Lincoln was killing vampires aiding the confederate army. Same universe
I love that I saved this video as something to watch while I’m donating blood. And yes, I realized the irony of it after I arrived at the office. Fortunately, nobody here seems pale or sparkly enough to keep my blood for themselves.
20:28 Another thing, they mention that they always come back to town eventually, but they would have to make sure it was long enough that EVERYONE is dead.
Here's a comment for the algorithm, all praise be. The drunkest I've ever been was while trying to watch one of the last movies, I worked at a movie theater, it was an employee screening, and I was bribed with booze. I spent most of the movie vomiting, although I've heard you don't even need to be wasted for that to happen
@@Drjordanbreeding I was not, it was after business hours, I was of legal age to drink, but most importantly the manager who was hanging around for it was a young dude who wouldn't have cared had he caught me the several times I went to the bathroom to vomit
Hey Jordan, this is a weird thing to put in a comment. I'm two days recovering from a nearly fatal mental health event, and seeing this popup has put a hard shot of cheer into my life. Thanks for putting these out there. You're the fucking man.
@@Drjordanbreeding hey Jodan, what's your hot take on the longest film series of all time: Protestantism. Are good works enough?? Or is Calvin (the cartoon character) right again?
Every video gets more chaotic and brilliant. I can't wait until a few years from now when the videos have reached their true form: several hours of non-stop boner and poop jokes.
Charlie is such a passive dad because he's trying to make up for beating up Bella's mom and buring the evidence in his last precinct. Now you got me making headcanon about Twilight!
1:25:48 "iiii much enjoyed the sex and arrived many a-times" is so funny to me, ive laughed out loud a lot during this video but this one really got me choking on my food. This whole video is so funny. Ive watched it 4 times because I'm doing other stuff too and find something new to laugh at every time. This is the only channel that I immediately click the video as soon as I see an upload, regardless of the content. Ive never seen the purge or 50 shades but ive watched these videos a few times 😂 scream was my favorite, and resident evil and underworld from the time on cracked but I seriously watch at least one video a day from this channel as a guilty pleasure binge when im getting ready in the morning or lunch or getting dinner ready or laying down. I cant help it, it picks my mood up and makes me laugh. It's like Cody Ko and Noel Miller with the old "its cringe", guaranteed to make me laugh. But it's so much better because its longer and just what im looking for! (Thats what she said)
I just wanna say, since i found your channel like a week ago I've basically been watching your videos non-stop. It's so great to have quality, entertaining long form content to listen to/watch while I'm at work or playing games. Hell they even play in my sleep because I can't stand silence. Practically nobody can produce content this good on this scale consistently, and man do I appreciate all the work it must take to put these things out so fast. So to you, Dave and anyone else working on these bad boys, I say bravo. Keep up the good work guys! And thanks for the laughs
@@Drjordanbreeding You're doing more than trying, you are succeeding. Thanks for all the laughs, your channel and humour has genuinely helped me relax through a difficult time. I'm glad I found your channel c:
Good timing on the drop, Doc. Got a lot of paper to write and this is the perfect background. FYI I thought the original thumbnail evoked some gone with the wind, but more shirtless. Too hot for YT, clearly.
I don’t even care, the sparkling in the sun is everything. I said what I said. But as a girl who loves glitter, diamond like, and the like things… I’m not upset.
Im making too many comments, but I think its poignant to point out that the writer of Twilight was/is a devout Mormon and thats why theres soo many times of old fashioned thinking about sex and marriage and souls and baby keeping. And in the book, Bella wears a long khaki skirt and sweaters (for modesty) to formally meet his family, and in the movie they wanted to keep her covered up to kind of reflect that without outright saying it. But I just found it interesting that when you apply some good ol religious beliefs to the moral ambiguity of the movie, you can kinda tell there was some mini-fundamentalism in there lol. Especially the books
I did not know that. Interesting.... I bet the writer partook in the sin of caffeine while writing their series of books about demons and stuff. I bet they even skipped family night and didn't go to Temple!
If you liked this hard-to-make video, consider checking out our PATREON: www.patreon.com/drjordanbreeding or channel memberships! ua-cam.com/channels/UfeQmlNZVQdzjiFBSwjOrQ.htmljoin . They’re identical in all the ways that matter *winks slowly and knowingly and vampire-like*.
Please, or his kids are going to starve.
"she thought she died and like, came to take her gamecube"
Pretty much literally happened to me. Lived with my mom, she died, landlord and his kids drop in, i'm like 'no, someone's still here', and the kids had already taken my gamecube.
@@KeithElliott-zd8cx That's wild haha
@@Drjordanbreeding yeah, just sort of funny that, not only did they come in looking for shit after a death, but it was actually a gamecube.
@@KeithElliott-zd8cx That’s so friggin’ illegal 😳
My favorite part of Twilight is Bella going "omg, Jacob, you're basically a baby and way too young for me" with their two year age gap. Ma'am, your boyfriend died during WWI.
Right!?
"I mean... Its fuckin weird."
Probably the best way to describe the style you've honed and I love it so much
Thanks haha
8:31 Jokes on you. Everyone knows that the Snyder Cut of Twilight is actually Fifty Shades of Grey.
Oh crap you're so right
It's absolutely criminal how little exposure this channel is getting.
I feel like the videos actually do pretty well considering the channel size! They just get there over time rather than all at once.
You single handedly became the face of Cracked while being just as funny as the original people, you kick ass Breeding!
Plus you're dedication to this awesome format actually feels fresh which is so rare these days on YT.
Not only that you engage with your audience and always did even on Cracked, we've had many back and forths over the time you've been doimg this, it's awesome, we all just think you deserve a bigger audience for your efforts!
If you get the chance to sell out, do it and tell em Zak sent you! 🤣
@@zakbrown9256 This is all extremely kind. If I sell out, I'll be sure to mention you haha
I know, right? ❤
YES I KNOW THIS IS THE WRONG THUMBNAIL BUT IT'S CLEANER AND CLEARER I'M SORRY.
This kind of wildcard behaviour is exactly why Dave's parents thought you were feral, I stg 😂
And you called this a democracy?!
Not yet, but you will be.....
@@ronat16 Holy crap you're probably right haha
@@JCash119 I NEVER SAID THAT
Haven't watched the video. Commenting for engagement. Gonna let it run in while i do chores so google thinks that I watched the ads, then come back and re-watch it "Ad free." I'm clever.
GENIUS
@@DrjordanbreedingBRILLIANT
MARVELOUSLY ENDOWED!
Aww that's so nice.
I had no idea such a clever trick exists! So you just let it end all the way, then press replay? Or manually move the little cursor thingy back to the beginning?
babe wake up new comfort video just dropped 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️
BABE HURRY
What I was hoping throughout the whole series was that when Jacob's grandfather turned into a wolf his wheelchair would turn into a doggie wheel chair. All the Oscars for Twilight if it had done that.
I love this so much
I don’t think I can live in this world anymore, considering that didn’t happen.
This may be a little deep for a UA-cam comment but I lost my best friend almost 2 weeks ago now. The guy I started this channel with, my GoldenEye friend, my Dave.
I've been understandably off since but sitting down and watching this video after work last night was the first time I was genuinely cracking up laughing again consistently since he passed.
Watching your stuff reminds me of hanging out and riffing with my now gone best friend and THAT is why I love your stuff so much sir.
Please keep up the amazing work.
Shoot, I'm so sorry to hear that. That really, really sucks. I'm glad this got to be a bit of a distraction at least.
❤❤
It's crazy that Twilight speedran into their baseball arc. In anime, you usually get at least a half season before that happens.
Had a surreal experience. A 5-second commercial popped up at exactly the moment you’d normally do a cutaway gag and it took the whole commercial to realize it wasn’t intentional.
For the record, it was a possibly sparkly vampire in the sun moment cutting to the commercial that goes “light it up!” and then a sax solo.
It’s a weird way to say I enjoy your cutaway jokes but cannot predict them.
I do actually intentionally place ads in spots like that haha
@@Drjordanbreeding also, was that an Edward Penishands reference?
That's too good 😂 light it up! ✨Sparkly jazz hands✨
"Edward might as well eat every estate lawyer in the world, buy a wig, and pretend that he found a bag of money"
Gold.
I had too much self respect to have watched any of these movies, but look at me now. No pride, just love for Jordan and Dave.
Nobody here has any respect for ANYTHING
I found my people!
Every time I think of Twilight, I'm reminded of a Wattpad retelling I read a few years ago, where Charlie is Italian, Bella goes to see SmackDown in Phoenix, and later makes friends with CM Punk, there's a cameo of Stephanie Meyer, the La Push girls have their own werewolf pack (and also a D&D group), and the Undertaker kills a vampire with a scythe.
Wow that sounds better
@@Drjordanbreeding The scythe thing alone sounds as rad as heck
Wtf
@@librarianseth5572Doesn't that happen in Interview with the Vampire?
The john cena edit is NOT played out, the callbacks to familiar jokes always kill me.
*PATHETIC!!*
I liked it when vampires were confused by a handful of corn. I'm oldskool like that
That's MY vampires!
One kernel, ah ah ah, two kernels, ah ah ah... sixty-nine thousand, four hundred and twenty kernels ah ah ah
They get….cornfused? I suppose there’s a kernel of truth to that.
@thebroddha9153 the count lives ah ah ah.
@aint2proud2meg lol! Yes, they have to stop to count the corn, or pins or whatever other small, numerous, objects you drop in front of them. Giving you time to escape
If you did a follow-up video where you discussed the several legal ways the vampires and werewolves would get screwed over in the modern day. Trail cameras, social security numbers, it's a gold mine.
Haha maybe somedayyyyy
As well as age of consent laws
Trail cameras: super human senses, smell hearing etc. Electronic device emit a high pitch while or some kind of noise outside of most human hearing range. Social security numbers: often they have dominate, or the ability to just hypnotise and command people into whatever and leave them with no memory of it. Or there's the Skyrim solution of unaliving someone and now your them.
Yeah lots of issues to be sure but easier than you think
Daddy Doctor Cullen’s income taxes…
At least they never have medical bills!
Wait… your children feed on the blood of patrons? Is that why I’m so weak and tired all the time? You mean, it WASNT law school?!
It’s BOTH
You should try medical school: existential dread is great 😭
“Dan did you meet any cullens…?” Was just…. *chefs kiss*
Haha thank you
I’m trying to enjoy, but all I can think is wow what a beautiful window seat that is…
I'll let my parents know haha
From the jokes, the sound bites, the music references, the Dave convos, the callbacks, & overall production this video is a 10/10 & surely up there with Beernado for me. Keep doing your thing bro
Amazing! So glad you think so!
Dave kidnapped my family AGAIN! and said if I didn't watch, like and comment, he would force them into life long servitude as your channel editors. So here I am, enjoying myself for them.
Your sacrifice is noted
how to flirt with a twilight vampire: "sniff me like a countertop in a 70s disco bathroom"
Works every time!
Long: ✓
Brutal: ✓
Good actors, acting badly: ✓
Somewhat competent filmmaking: ✓
Ahhhh yes the proper sweet spot for DR. J Breeding.
This is where I THRIVE
@@Drjordanbreeding It was awesome; but how did you get through that entire video without even once poking at the author’s Mormon background being the driving force behind Edward’s staunch refusal to do the naughties with her until she turned 18 and they could get married?
@@Bethsabee_Sheba_Newrose this may surprise you, but I do basically zero research for these haha
The marriage only had to wait because LDS doesn't want attention brought to parental consent bypassing the age requirement.@@Bethsabee_Sheba_Newrose
@@Drjordanbreeding …you know what? A lot more things make sense now that I’m aware of this.
15:55. "this joke is played out..."
NEVER GIVE UP!
At this stage I now know more about Twilight then any other film series I haven't actually watched
Yay? Haha
Well, knowledge is power, so knowledge about the Twilight series must be....uh, no, that doesn't sound right. 🤔
I’ve been coating on the body glitter for HOURS. Let’s goooo ✨
Oh man you're so ready!
Love that editor call out. your videos are really funny and well done. I never had any interest in this movie series but for you I'd watch a video about anything. Keep up the great work.
Wow, thanks! Yeah every video is usually divvied up between several of us, although this one was mostly me (except the first section was mostly Bryan!)
I'VE BEEN CHECKING THE CHANNEL EVERYDAY FOR A MONTH JUST FOR THIS ONE VIDEO, I AM SO HAPPY
I hope the wait was worth it!
Can't wait for the Medea content!😂❤
Haha uhhhhhh
@@Drjordanbreeding get the same one martin Lawrence used in big mama to
No he’s gotta do the big mommas house movies first 😂.
Dammit, DJB, that's another set of movies you've saved me the trouble of watching! They looked positively grueling to sit through, much less edit, so my hat's off once for the effort and once again for the jokes. Oh, and one more hats-off for the sneaky Cat-Stevens-via-Sheryl-Crow clip. Thanks!
Glad you enjoyed it haha
Bet you show more emotion than Kristen Stewart did in the whole series
Man, I hope so
😂
Trilogy?
@@boomboomskidskid, my bad. Corrected now. Thanks!
As someone who unfortunately read the books as a teen before realizing how weird they were, I really needed you tearing these movies apart
Feels like therapy in the best of ways
I’m here to help you heal
I was in actual high school when these movies came out and I still don't look as old as these "permanent teenagers" did.
Haha yeah
3 minutes in and I've already had enough Madea in this twilight retrospective.
Ha sorry
Love Dave's mask with the glasses
Haha that was his idea, actually
Early Breeders, let's go!
"Dave, put your pants back on! And what's up with the salad dressing?" XD
Haha YES
@@Drjordanbreeding Here's hoping Casper makes an appearance in the review and the prophecy is fulfilled!
P.S. Great job on the intro and theme song. Short and sweet motifs getting right to the point but identifiable enough. Really digging it.
@@TheSaxDragon Haha thanks!
An hour fifty-four?! I like this return to short-form content!
It was a BREEZE
"You cant go to Switzerland! You said you were Switzerland! They cant both be true!" Man i love these videos 😂
IT'S TRUE THO
I am honestly shocked (and thankful) that someone hasn’t gotten a good way through making an official spinoff based of the Twilight series.
Couldn't stand to leave Jordan hanging @ 48:55, so I air-fived him back. Facts.
I felt it!
This man saved Cracked singlehandedly. He deserves millions of views per video.
Ha well thank you. I feel good about the track we are on!
Man that intro tune rocks so hard
Glad you dig it!
All hail our robot (algorithm) overlords!
God, dude, these videos rip. I keep coming back to 'em. I've been watching (both these and the other ones on... another channel, ...somewhere...) basically on repeat for like, the last three months. Idk what it is, but your videos make me really happy, Doctor. You're crushing it, I honestly don't look forward to any other channel releases nearly as much. UA-cam may think it's weird, but it really does it for me, so hopefully keep crankin' em out, and I'll 110% keep watching (seriously, I can't stop)
That's so great to hear! More on the way!
Hahaha you're the best man! Perfect timing just saved me from having nothing to listen to at work right now 😂
Enjoy!
The way the unhinged editing of these videos remains so consistent… I love it.
Glad you like them!
So glad my credit popped during the Dumb and Dumber clip. 😂😂😂
Screenshot that for posterity!
@@DrjordanbreedingThat was absolutely the first thing I did. 🙃
Seems like the baseball scene and the giant fight scene are the only two enjoyable bits of this franchise, yet they're spaced out at either ends of the whole thing
You can't tell me they didn't do that on purpose
I doubt many things were done on purpose
"are they always like this?" "It's getting worse with old age" with the name tags made me cackle out loud, and it's only five minutes into the video. This is gonna be a good ride.
Hah yeah I love that little bit
@@Drjordanbreedingthe best part is going to be how well this comment age. You KNOW you're children in the future will not listen to past you
This is my first time watching twilight, thank you professor
Welcome!
I left a kind of harsh criticism on another video about the frenetic nature and difficulty to follow the through line, this video is that criticism destroyed, it's way tighter, you say more with less words which keeps the scripting super tight, it's point, joke point, cutaway all on the same through line, you never miss the overall point or lose track of what's going on. I know this kind of editing is very labor intensive but everything flows so well in a straight line, rather than the individual pieces taking away from the whole they all contribute, rather than it being hard to stay engaged it's the opposite, it sucks you and engages you. It's so good.
Edit: My new criticism is continuity, the light changes quite a bit during the filming, just letting you know
Wow well that’s really great to hear (lighting aside, stupid Dave)
I freaking love the new intro's you have! Can't wait to dive into 2 more hours of the Doctor's Prescription; more great videos!
Glad you like them! More on the way
I'm disappointed that you didn't make the connection between this series and the film "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Jasper was turned into a vampire during the civil war and Lincoln was killing vampires aiding the confederate army. Same universe
Ha I thought about it (I’ve read that book, actually) but I just didn’t have anything to say haha
@@Drjordanbreeding fair enough love the vids
The surprise Don Broco, Sleep Token, and Bilmuri shout out put a huge smile on my face.
Hell yeah haha
Oh man, it feels weird being so timely to the video! I know what I'm about to do with my time! Thanks Dr! You got a loyal Breeder in me!
Well... good luck haha
My sister wanted to say she enjoys this light, bright touches of blue, window seat set up
(Her words, I don't understand them but does look good)
Ha I’ll let my parents know!
I also noticed the light change before Dave pointing it out and did laugh at being called out for being that person who noticed 😂
I love that I saved this video as something to watch while I’m donating blood. And yes, I realized the irony of it after I arrived at the office. Fortunately, nobody here seems pale or sparkly enough to keep my blood for themselves.
Oooooo perfect haha
I comment in support of the channel whenever I think to. I call it the “algorhythm method” because I do it a lot and cross my fingers hoping.
Hopefully it works haha.
Its crazy that Anna Kendrick's boobs at one point didn't even remember being in this movie.
He must’ve had fun! the old Dr Jordan joy is here loud and proud!!!
Haha glad you think so!
@@Drjordanbreeding 😂😂
My God, I love these videos! Laughing out loud and keeping Dr. Breeding's kids fed. This is a good thing...
You are so kind haha
20:28 Another thing, they mention that they always come back to town eventually, but they would have to make sure it was long enough that EVERYONE is dead.
Oh yeah... weird
Downright sloppy.
Here's a comment for the algorithm, all praise be. The drunkest I've ever been was while trying to watch one of the last movies, I worked at a movie theater, it was an employee screening, and I was bribed with booze. I spent most of the movie vomiting, although I've heard you don't even need to be wasted for that to happen
Wow did they fire you? Haha
@@Drjordanbreeding I was not, it was after business hours, I was of legal age to drink, but most importantly the manager who was hanging around for it was a young dude who wouldn't have cared had he caught me the several times I went to the bathroom to vomit
If a series has a cop daddy, Dr Breeding will be there
Amen!
Hey Jordan, this is a weird thing to put in a comment. I'm two days recovering from a nearly fatal mental health event, and seeing this popup has put a hard shot of cheer into my life. Thanks for putting these out there. You're the fucking man.
Oh man I’m sorry to hear that, but I’m glad this video could help in some small way!
@@Drjordanbreeding hey Jodan, what's your hot take on the longest film series of all time: Protestantism. Are good works enough?? Or is Calvin (the cartoon character) right again?
@@yourGalDee There are definitely some good moments
I dont care how many people cover twilight, I'll watch all the videos. My love for twilight is based firmly on how much i can make fun of it
It is so supernaturally sucky.
Love the callbacks to prior Twilight talks, and the ever-expanding B(reeding) O(nline) U(niverse). When does Dave get his spinoff streaming show?
Haha who knoooooows
Today is a much better day now!
I hope so!
Oh my god yes. Twilight was made for your breakdown. I'm ordering some Arby's and Natty Light in hopes that Dave gets the help he needs.
Haha he needs a LOT of help
Yo the Kung pow enter the fist clip? Amazing. This whole video is hilarious
Haha happy to serve!
@@Drjordanbreeding"weeeeooooo weeeeeoo weeeeoooo" " again with the squeaky shoes"
Since the moment you gave us a heads up, I have been BREATHLESSLY WAITING.
And it's here!
Every video gets more chaotic and brilliant. I can't wait until a few years from now when the videos have reached their true form: several hours of non-stop boner and poop jokes.
That’s all I’ve ever wanted haha
funny enough i saw the first twilight in a theatre yesterday and seeing that masterpiece in the big screen as an adult is crazy
People really have fun with those haha
There's only 2 good things about these movies: This video right here, and also Anna Kendrick.
The big two as I say
I am already only 8 minutes into the video and I have a literal spit take
Yessssss
Charlie is such a passive dad because he's trying to make up for beating up Bella's mom and buring the evidence in his last precinct.
Now you got me making headcanon about Twilight!
Yooo that zoom in on Kristen Stewarts preggo mirror face where she looka likea Gollum will haunt my dreams forever omg
Sorrrryyyyy
@@Drjordanbreeding hahahaha s'aight homie
Not going to lie, I was worried about the funny to cringe ratio of jokes with this series, but Jordan knocked it out of the park
That's good to here!
You're a better human than me. I've never seen any of these movies. I think it is making this a lot funnier, though.
I’m glad you’re enjoying it!
1:25:48 "iiii much enjoyed the sex and arrived many a-times" is so funny to me, ive laughed out loud a lot during this video but this one really got me choking on my food. This whole video is so funny. Ive watched it 4 times because I'm doing other stuff too and find something new to laugh at every time. This is the only channel that I immediately click the video as soon as I see an upload, regardless of the content. Ive never seen the purge or 50 shades but ive watched these videos a few times 😂 scream was my favorite, and resident evil and underworld from the time on cracked but I seriously watch at least one video a day from this channel as a guilty pleasure binge when im getting ready in the morning or lunch or getting dinner ready or laying down. I cant help it, it picks my mood up and makes me laugh. It's like Cody Ko and Noel Miller with the old "its cringe", guaranteed to make me laugh. But it's so much better because its longer and just what im looking for! (Thats what she said)
I'm so glad to hear it!
I just wanna say, since i found your channel like a week ago I've basically been watching your videos non-stop. It's so great to have quality, entertaining long form content to listen to/watch while I'm at work or playing games. Hell they even play in my sleep because I can't stand silence. Practically nobody can produce content this good on this scale consistently, and man do I appreciate all the work it must take to put these things out so fast. So to you, Dave and anyone else working on these bad boys, I say bravo. Keep up the good work guys! And thanks for the laughs
I appreciate the kind words and support, means a lot! So happy you found the channel too!
The fact that you only refer to him as “Ed” is sending me 😂😂
Are you Team Ed?
@@Drjordanbreeding the only team I’m on is the Breeders BABYYYY
HOOOW do you only have 26k subs, your content is amazing. Good work, keep it up!
I’m tryiiiiiing haha
@@Drjordanbreeding You're doing more than trying, you are succeeding. Thanks for all the laughs, your channel and humour has genuinely helped me relax through a difficult time. I'm glad I found your channel c:
Finally, the Breeding I've been waiting for.😂
It’s here!
Good timing on the drop, Doc. Got a lot of paper to write and this is the perfect background. FYI I thought the original thumbnail evoked some gone with the wind, but more shirtless. Too hot for YT, clearly.
Too good for this world
@@Drjordanbreeding it tickles me that you actually reply to me. Thanks, man.
@@DeathRobotKailozo I mean, thanks for watching!
I don’t even care, the sparkling in the sun is everything. I said what I said. But as a girl who loves glitter, diamond like, and the like things… I’m not upset.
Snyder scares me. I found out the plot to Suckerpunch and now I'm worried his crimes are worse than Dave's crimes.
Im making too many comments, but I think its poignant to point out that the writer of Twilight was/is a devout Mormon and thats why theres soo many times of old fashioned thinking about sex and marriage and souls and baby keeping. And in the book, Bella wears a long khaki skirt and sweaters (for modesty) to formally meet his family, and in the movie they wanted to keep her covered up to kind of reflect that without outright saying it. But I just found it interesting that when you apply some good ol religious beliefs to the moral ambiguity of the movie, you can kinda tell there was some mini-fundamentalism in there lol. Especially the books
Huh... well there you go!
I did not know that. Interesting.... I bet the writer partook in the sin of caffeine while writing their series of books about demons and stuff. I bet they even skipped family night and didn't go to Temple!
some of us (me) have been hoping for this since (undisclosed media company) days. praise be unto Doctor Breeding™©
Well hey! I'm happy to finally deliver!
Swaim convinced you didn't he?
Thank you for suffering for our entertainment as always Dr. Breeding! Your framing device was still a better love story than Twilight.
Haha hell yeah thank you
Jordan you have a lovely home
This is my parents' house haha. Definitely not mine.
Still amazing. Still my jam. You’re the best.
Thank you so much!
"People have hymens DAVE!!" You need to put that on a shirt. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I can't believe he doesn't believe in those
Tbf, not *all* people have hymens. And some have 2. It can be confusing, I'm glad you can set Dave right.
love that you take the time to reply to comment. loved the leprechaun video
Of course! And that's awesome to hear!
That Ezra Miller joke 😂💀
Ha thank you
I had to pause the video😂
I HAVE BEEN WAITING LITERAL YEARS FOR THIS!
It’s here!!!
Yay! You went with the first one!!!
I did haha
Things I have in common with Stephanie Meyer:
- Enjoys long fantasy sagas
- Unironic love of Muse
- Bad at writing
Wow twinsies haha