What I Learned About Life from Death | Jane Whitlock | TEDxMinneapolis
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- Опубліковано 20 лис 2018
- Jane lost her husband at the age of 47. This experience transformed every aspect of her life. She believes this level of transformation is available to every single person out there. When we don't talk about death and remind ourselves daily, (maybe hourly) that we are going to die, we run the risk of taking this magical gift called life for granted and getting all tangled up in caring about what doesn't matter. Jane Whitlock, aka, Doula Jane, is an end-of-life doula. Whitlock provides guidance and emotional support for individuals and families through the end-of-life process. Why is it okay to ask strangers at the supermarket about their pregnancy but not about their impending death? Doula Jane spends an inordinate amount of time thinking about how she can normalize death. You could say that she has a healthy fascination with death, grief, and dying. Recognising the need for an impartial and compassionate perspective during her husband’s terminal cancer battle in 2013, Whitlock launched her practice to help others in dealing with the fragile and fleeting constants of life and death. Whitlock declares that Death and its sacred rituals have many gifts to offer us. The gift of living our best lives while we face dying. The gift of finding meaning in our lives. The gift of having the opportunity to tell loved ones: I'm sorry, I forgive you, thank you, and goodbye. When we know we are dying and time is short there comes an opportunity for deep transformation for both the departing and their loved ones. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
I try to process all I feel,
as I watch this video...
But the pain is too great,
too big, too overwhelming.
smothering: I am breathless.
I am drowning, suffocating.
Dying of loneliness and longing.
I can't bear it. I just can't.
Please, please pray for me, friends.
May the prayer(s) you say for me, bless you, as well...
I had Cancer. Then lost two of the closest people to me to Cancer. When you get told you have Cancer, or your loved one is terminal, everything slips away except for love and compassion. Nothing is important. I live every day not planning for a future. People think I'm crazy, or wrong, but I say live for now tomorrow might not be here.
Agree Jay jay, live for today. Soetimes we forget.... but when you come close to death the only thing that means anything is love. God bless and live for today your best self. Live life like its your last but with love and kindness!
we love you Jay Jay :)
What a special lady. So comfortable in her own skin, wearing her crinkled skirt and casual sandals, no pretence, you feel like you know her, or want to know her. What a fantastic way of looking at death and the journey there. I would hire her for someone I love who was dying.
Thank you. I am visiting my elderly parents at the moment, who I don't get to see very often because I live far from them. My father has had a fall and although he broke some bones, he's OK. But he doesn't feel that he's doing that great, he feels the breath of mortality. Today we are going to my uncle's memorial service. My mother is heartbroken because her baby brother died on her birthday last month. She's overwhelmed because my father doesn't think he's going to make it and she's not well herself. This talk randomly came up on my feed and I now how the courage to take up some knitting today. Thank you very much.
Sending lots of love to you and your parents
Carpe Diem became my motto after I was diagnosed with 4th stage cancer
Everything she is saying is so true
I have been a caregiver losing my wife to cancer over 30 years ago
Now I’m on the other end
Bless you
God bless you..lightand ❤️
"Best human self: Kind, Loving and Grateful"
I love this talk. Thank you for being real and vulnerable! After working in healthcare for 20 years and losing my mother to cancer without a doctor ever having conversation about death it is refreshing to hear someone talking about it in beautiful, honest way.
Thank you. It's quite a full plate you serve. However I wish that you would take your time and go to all the nde sites. Near death experience. There are truly many wonderful experiences that we all have had when our heart and our brain stopped working for anywhere from 2 minutes to a half hour. And we left our body and we were greeted by angels previous friends and yes Jesus. And when you do pass on it's a delightful experience you probably don't have any pain but you're out of your body and your body's left behind with all of this drunk. Like a butterfly coming out of a cocoon. And if you're lucky enough to make a transition into the light and feel the ever abundant dazzling wonderful love of God you then know that it always was here with us. And as I passed on and experienced it I look back to the Earth and I saw those who were isolated alone because they don't turn their face to the sunshine of God's love and I said I'll go back just to remind others that they don't they are not alone now and never will be and all living a blessed existence now and will have more of a blessed experience when they pass over. Eternally loved Louis
Jane, you made me cry and laugh at the same time. BRAVO! 👏
Thank you for sharing it with us!
THIS WAS FANTASTIC!!!! thank you!
I'd never heard of a 'death doula' until recently but it makes perfect sense, if we have them for birth, then why not at the other end. Thank you Jane!
This was amazing. 👏🏼 So glad to have found a kindred spirit. I have been helping people with their dogs’ transitions for years. ❤
That was so beautiful! I just lost my mother a few days ago and it has been a very difficult time. 😥🙏
best and most needed ted talk ever! thank you so much!
What a gift. So grateful to be able to share this with others. Thank you
Thank you. I attended my mom's memorial service yesterday. I vow to contemplate my own death each day. Death can indeed be equated to birth 🙏
Bravo. Absolutely perfect sense of humor, heart and authenticity. You’re a beautiful soul. God bless🙏🙏🙏
I talked to hubby mom and dad about death long before they died. They were so calm when they died.
Most captivating - mind-opening - funniest speech ever. Thank you!
Jane you are so authentic and so funny. I am so proud and grateful! xo Suzanne
Great job Jane. Very touching.
Jane, thank you. I'm dealing with the death of a loved one and you really helped me. Everyone should see this, it's so funny and so moving and so universal.
It took me this long to finally view this, and though it is a timeless subject, seeing it now feels precisely timed for a most beneficial impact. Thank you, Death Doula Jane for letting your soul drive.
Please check out on UA-cam etc. NDE. Those who are of us that have had near-death experiences on going to the other side and come back. Can tell that there are angels waiting to lift you out of your physical form and into a whole new wonderful loving world. Call them angels Jesus well God's holy workers. Be mentally emotionally at peace. Life is abundant and eternal. Love Louis
You touched my heart Jane! Thank you for being YOU!
This had the best beginning as birth is such a reflection to our end of life. Thank you! I work in hospice as a volunteer coordinator and it does sound like maybe she was volunteering in the wrong hospice. So many of the people I serve could not afford personal care let alone a death doula. While there is a clinical side, there is also a spiritual, emotional and personal side. Hospice is patient driven and how many times I’ve said, “I’m not leaving you until you give me the go.” We meet people where they are, and bring to them support, presence and what they love among so much more. And humor! Thank you Doula Jane for your humor! End of life work comes from many angles. Thank you all for all you do.
...and likewise thank-you for what you do!
It is my turn to select a topic for my monthly book club. I decided to use your video along with an assignment to have each member write his/her own obit to share. I'm so curious how this will turn out this coming Sunday! Everyone loves your TEDX talk! Thank you!
Did the group go for it? Were u surprised by the shares? You and your friends are fortunate to have this group as it's truly more about books.
@@DraGnFly007 yes, we did. I was in a silly mood, so I kept mine humorous while the others were serious and somber. Everyone in the book club enjoyed the assignment, though. 😀
thank you - I have a friend who also is a death doula - thank you for your work, your humor, for my tears and deep appreciation for this talk - I needed it!
What a loveable woman! With a great message. Big hugs!
You are a delight, Jane! Thank you- I'm learning to 'make friends' with the ultimate destination. You added a lot to my lesson.
A million thanks wouldn't be enough.
Fantastic speech! Really makes you reconsider lots of things and brings in a new perspective!
This is one of the most inspiring TED Talks I have ever seen! Thank you!!!
Thank you so much for this amazing talk...I learned a few good life lessons for sure 🥰🥰
Exelente y muy sencilla ilustración de como vivir , enfrentar y ayudar a otros a enfrentar la muerte.
the best ted talk ever. thank you so much for your kindness , mrs whitlock.
she is simply amazing
Thank you, this was beautiful and so informative. You are a beautiful lady♥️
Listened to you twice love, not once. Somebody who shared my views so profoundly ❤️ I too look around at gatherings and wonder at people. Arguing fighting being mean not realising with one click on the Master Keyboard....one of us may never see tomorrow in this world.....and wonder which one it will be. Hope life treats you kind🙏💕 God bless always ❤️
Thank you for your service. Want to give you a big warm hug! ❤️🙌
Beautiful talk, everyone should see it!
Thank you Jane
Loved the analogy (to live LIFE like a car): "The soul does the driving, the ego is in the back seat, and death is riding shotgun." Near the end of your talk, I finally heard what you'd said (3 times earlier) - the word "knitter." Knitting a lonely patient's experiences together - the gift of their life's purpose.
Awesome job! Very engaging and fun to listen to.
Thank you!
You are beautiful! I am truly inspired.
My plan for death? Is to live my life the best I can that mirrors Christ's. Ask for forgiveness and guidance when I fall short (which is everyday.) I am preparing for my life AFTER death as well. Jane, thank you for your share.
I think people are nervous and hence laughing, I was crying.
Brilliant speech.
Great talk! I already play those games, I'm going to have more fun with them now thinking of you and this talk
So good
Thank you
you are truly a beautiful person...
Beautiful amazing soul . It's so true when we loose our loved ones. Magically life goes on. Thank you, bless you. All your dreams come true .
One word: FABULOUS!!!!! 🙂
I would love this with Spanish subtitles.
cool lady - but u are never alone when your dying, your guardian angel and the Lord is with u - amen
Agree you are never alone. There is always the lord, your guides, your angels and your family on the other side. God bless
Aaargh. Not really the point. Is it? If you can’t be honest with someone when they lay dying, then when?
That is wonderful if that is someone's belief. No one should physically die alone unless that is what they ask for.
Not everyone believes that however- so it’s important to say that to specific people and not all
@@melissamedina6685 your right dear - thats so true
Very interesting
EXCELLENT
very interesting
thanks so much maam .....idia
That was great 👍
BRAVA Jane!
I always thought like that .. since very young I couldn’t understand what is the big deal with dying
Excellent presentation, thank you. I am looking for your contact info. Could you share, please?
i experinced body going up my sprit and body laying on bed ,,i was having aneurysm ,,blood clot stopped by lung and heart
❤️
I can't really suspend my belief in life beyond " death" so this is 'unbelievable' to me! But while I am believing and being quite certain 'I' survive death, despite my body's eventual disintegration, I guess I also must be tolerant of those who do not yet know about life after 'death'. I am the spirit and the energy and consciousness that enabled all those intrauterine cells to co-ordinate and cooperate and evolve into a "viable" fetus and eventually become born as a spirit/soul with a body. and I am the same spirit self which exits from the bodily form at 'death' to carry on much as I was prior to conception. The details of life beyond continue to elude me, and that's likely as it should be. I find plenty in this physical world to be confused about. This is a very sad video for me. According to it, by inference, billions of souls that once breathed in a body and loved and laughed, are no more. Surely it begs the question, "Why on earth should they ever have been at all?" I just don't buy it.
James Jones wrote 'From Here to Eternity'. I wonder how this other person gained access to that title.
🕊
I used to be normal. 🥴🎯🙏🏽💖💊
What can anyone say after a talk like this;)
Those guys are crazy laughing
re Bea o wow
Hindutva has the whole concept mentioned and explained in detail. Read Bhagwad Gita book. Replace Krishna with your name.
To be aware is the key and our journey is unique, no matter how many scriptures describing and explaing the phenomenon of birth and death one reads or recites. We have to walk our own walk. Wisdom is not a monopoly - it's universal. To learn from others experiences is invaluable. Be aware, be mindful be happy. There is only one thing permanent that everything is temporary.
india
thank you....try to act like this...
The old farmer and his dog. - UA-cam
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The pregnancy to terminal cancer comparison is flawed. The correct one would be fetus versus the body in the coffin They do behave similar to each other
Not everyone goes into a coffin tho - and it’s not a comparison to cancer it’s a comparison of the before birth and after death
Yeehaw
beautiful women....wink wink.....are often extremely intelligent, and indeed she is intelligent this Jane
(are you going to delete this one too)
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...the constant laughter is most annoying, funny how people show their nervousness by giggling!
❤