Cinematic Excrement: Episode 129 - Swept Away
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- Опубліковано 9 кві 2021
- Everybody comes to Hollywood.
This video contains the following music:
Suonatore di Liuto by Kevin MacLeod
Link: incompetech.filmmusic.io/song...
License: filmmusic.io/standard-license
Five Armies by Kevin MacLeod
Link: incompetech.filmmusic.io/song...
License: filmmusic.io/standard-license
BLOG: cinematicexcrement.wordpress.com
TWITTER: / smeghead4269
VIMEO: vimeo.com/cinematicexcrement (If you can't find an older episode of Cinematic Excrement on UA-cam, it's probably here.) - Комедії
"Why update the movie if you're not going to...update the movie?"
Welcome to how I felt about the Lion King remake.
As well as Gus van Sant's Psycho
Well, they DID update the Lion King in the remake. They made it shitty.
Right?
@@tristanhartup4936 At least with that one, that was the point.
In his review Todd in the Shadows concluded that Ritchie dumbed down the movie getting rid of all of the explicitely political themes to turn it into a rom com in the vein of Overboard, but forgot to omit all the physical abuse which make it uncomfortable to watch.
Fun fact: Giannini being creepy earned him to be the voice actor dubbing Jack Nicholson in Batman89 and Shining
The son is the voice actor for the Joker(Ledger) and the Joker(Phoenix)...they've done an amazing job
So here in Italy we have a family of Jokers no wonder they do a good job acting creepy.
@Brandon Horror CollectorYeaah I got it
Giannini (father)
ua-cam.com/video/qDSztfbinws/v-deo.html&ab_channel=k0z4utube
Master of Disguise deserves it's own episode
completely agree
And Ecks Vs Sever :p
@@KorenLesthe He does have it but it's on Vimeo due to copyright issues with UA-cam
@@jalex.musica Oh thanks !
@@jalex.musica no he doesn’t
My late mother (RIP--she died in 2016) saw the original Swept Away in a movie theater, and it was one of the few films she saw that made her angry...
Remember when Smeghead reviewed The Cat In The Hat (2004) and he mentioned dreading the day he would have to review Gigli?
May is coming...
Yep…
One of the worst life choices Al Pacino has ever made! The same goes for Jack & Jill!
"We come to it at last...the great battle of our time..."
He has dreaded that day for about a whole decade now.
Man i feel sorry for Jeanne Tripplehorne. She had to turned down the role of Mia Wallace in Pulp Fiction because her mom had cancer, then she got Waterworld and then this...
@1997residente: Tripplehorne would’ve made a great Mia Wallace, but her role as Beth Gardner in Basic Instinct was exceptional. The character’s emotional state was completely unnerving, especially when she and Nick Curran fall prey to Catherine Tramell’s manipulation
Dang. 🙁
😂😂😂
Time for the spiritual successor to Cinemadonna.
Guy Ritchie has one of the most hit and miss careers I've ever seen. For everything great he's made...he's made this and other god awful stinkers.
I'll give him credit. He does go for original takes and ideas. I personally love his Sherlock Holmes films.
I had fun with Aladdin 2019.
I liked his gangster movies.
@@tylerfish2701 I think it's one of Disney's better remakes too, Sean can take shots at the film all he wants, it ain't gonna change the fact that it's one of only 4 live-action remakes I'll ever watch, the others being 101 Dalmatians, Cinderella, and The Jungle Book
@@erichfiedler1481 I liked The Jungle Book as well! They incorporated more elements of the book.
112 Episodes Ago: "...but due to some stiff competition from Gigli, and I dreading the day when I finally sit down and watch that..."
Well, it looks like that day has finally come
he can protest and pronounce it 'giggly' the whole time.
Take a shot everytime you hear Madonna's character shout "ANTHONY!"
Even an immortal being named Paul Rudd didn't went too far.
“My freaking ears!” - Todd Flanders
I took up your challenge I'm now in the hospital with severe alcohol poisoning and I'm sending you the bill 😛
NO YOU FOOL! The human liver can only sustain so much punishment!
No, you're alright...
Eight Crazy Nights and Master of Disguise weren’t even *nominated* for Worst Picture? Someone at SNL must’ve slipped the Razzies committee a $20...
Disney also probably did the same since Artemis Fowl doesn't have a single Razzie nomination.
Sony bribed them that year.
@@imaadshahrukh4829 (Mimics Caddicarus from his Nursery Rhymes on VHS videos) *WHAT!?*
That is baffling that those two movies were overlooked by the Razzies for Worst Picture.
Also, IMO, Master of Disguise is worse than Eight Crazy Nights. ECN didn’t have a good story, but at least it had *A* story. MOD, on the other hand, barely qualifies as a movie. It felt more like a series of sketches and sequences strung together with no rhyme or reason. Not to mention the fact that it’s only 72 minutes long, and the last eight minutes are padded with outtakes and deleted scenes.
That's a technical foul
When asked why the movie was going direct to video in the UK, Ritchie replied "because people think it's sh!t"
Every movie I've ever seen which had Madonna in it proves two things:
1) She is good in very small short scenes as a supporting character.
2)She could never carry the ball by herself when given the lead role. This is why all of those films are practically unwatchable.
There are exceptions to this. She's one of the leads in Dangerous Game, and she's actually decent in it. ...The fact that she plays an actress trying to break into films and prove that she can actually act might have had something to do with that, though.
@@Talisguy yes! But I’d argue that Evita was an exception, maybe because she sings through all of it instead of talking.
I will never get tired of the "NEW YORK CITY!?!" gag.
Man, I remember seeing so many of those commercials as a kid from the 90's and early 2000's. Seriously, that one-liner will never get old!
Get a rope.
Todd in the Shadows said in his review of Swept Away, that in the original it was obvious that Wertmuller was trying to troll her audience. That's why there was so much misogyny and the "hero" was so awful to his "love interest". It was supposed to shock and disturb the audience. I personally don't agree with that directing philosophy but I can understand what she was going for.
To me Raffaella looked relieved when the chopper took her away. Gennarino ends up all alone, divorced and empty-handed, and even his "trusted friend" the sea betrays him.
I honestly love watching his misery at the end. He was terrible.
@@miticaBEP07 That was the point. It's one of those anti-man narratives
@@floydlooney6837 it seems to me like the other men are fine. It’s just Gennarino who’s weird, and Raffaella is also terrible. Her incompetence is hilarious, when she asks Gennarino if there’s a hotel on the island I couldn’t help myself.
@@miticaBEP07 Yes, that was pretty dumb since they arrived at the same time she knew as much about the place as he did
@@floydlooney6837 He told her the island was deserted. She ignored what he said.
15:04 Hold on, YOU'RE FORTY? You ARE doing pretty well for forty dude, damn!
I await the Master of Disguise Cinematic Excrement. That movie... it holds a special place in my heart.
I regret seeing that film on Netflix when I was little...
(Shudders)
I only remember the ads for that film, especially the turtle scene. They play that bit *A LOT* in the commercials.
A film that wants to die and does everything in its power to die...and succeed. But, it didn't have to bring whatever audience it had with it.
@@kyliethelittlespider-mangirl94 I regret seeing that film on television, the only saving grace were the commercials, mainly because I misplaced the remote one time and I felt like Grunkle Stan, in that moment, while feeling like Alex being tortured
@@kyliethelittlespider-mangirl94I regret watching that movie on some car trips.
Nice Italian, apart from a few accents. And the worst part of Swept Away is how Lina Wertmuller cried 'What have they done to my movie?' after seeing it.
I mean, if I were her I'd have cried too. Also, I wouldn't be shocked Giancarlo Giannini disowned his son after seeing this lol.
“Are we being punished for being rich?”
CUT! alright madonna’s stunt double, are you ready to get chucked into the ocean?
10:33 When I saw this movie, I never shouted "Fuck you" louder in my life than I did at that part
Laughed out loud at the, "Girl, talk about it!" 😆 And, you're doing just fine for 40, Sean! 🤓
It's a good thing Sean doesn't have to review the two films Madonna directed yet because not only could she not act, she couldn't direct either. I still feel bad for poor Todd in the Shadows for having to sit through her entire filmmography (although A Leauge of their Own is a genuine classic).
A League of their own is a classic due to the ensemble cast, not so much Madonna. If Madonna has been cast in the roles played by Geena Davis or Lori Petty, it definitely would not have been well regarded.
@@MegaMagicdog Oh, I agree. Madonna was better as a supporting character and not in the lead role as Kit or Dottie. That film belonged to Geena Davis and Tom Hanks.
With regards to Madonna, if she's in a supporting role, she tends to be OK--OTOH, cast her as the lead and she's in way over her head...
@@Unknown-bq9id well that kinda makes sense 😅
not true. she made some very good documentaries, videos, and w.e. is a very strong first effort. I know many people who saw it and loved it without knowing madonna directed it. It's very easy and predictable to join the masses and say "oh she stinks as a director", when you try to see bad in everything, but as a director (and in evita and dangerous game, where even some of the toughest critics praised her acting) she's good.
2:37 Ah, but Sean, remember, Bo Derek KNOWS she can't act, and that's why she's more or less been playing "herself" after John died.
And she can't do THAT either....
I've seen Bolero, Ghosts Can't Do It and Tarzan The Ape Man and although her acting was terrible in those 3 films I wasn't convinced that she'll never be able to act. I'll give 10 a watch someday.
Your pronunciation of the Italian title for the original 1974 film "Swept Away" wasn't half-shabby. In fact, it was really great.
18:45 The Rollerball remake should have gotten a Worst Picture nomination as well.
I do not envy the Smeghead for the upcoming review for Absolute Proof
At least Ritchie has The Gentleman as a decent enough comeback.
Definitely looking forward to his upcoming project, Wrath of Man.
The Man from U.N.C.L.E. was better than its reputation suggests, it was just completely screwed after Tom Cruise backed out, that's all, miserable misfortune.
Oh yeah, that movie was pretty underrated.
And to be honest, I'd think Henry Cavill would make a decent James Bond.
@@mattc2306 Tom Cruise left the project for Mission Impossible, so, I can forgive him that, I just implore that he stops after MI8, before The Law of Averages arrives, it will.
Hold up, you're 40? Damn, I legit had no idea.
When you brought up the Golden Globes' sketchiness, I thought you were going for Sia's Music. I know it was a slow award season, but come on, Golden Globes!
Though credit to Tina Fey and Amy Poehler for not even attempting to hide their contempt for that film.
I thought he was going to mention Pia Zadora again
Came for the reviews, stayed for the Pace picante sauce meme.
Between this and the topic of next month's video, I can assume that couples who work together on a film can be disastrous to the movie and their relationship.
Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman did pretty well
This wasn't even Madonna's first time doing that. Look at Shanghai Surprise. I don't care what anyone says. THAT was the worst movie of 1986.
@Vikki DC Also Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbach.
@Vikki DC John Krasinski and Emily Blunt.
Sigh....I thought Mr. and Mrs. Smith would break the streak.
Oh boy howdy I can’t wait to know what you have to say about Gigli
Same
After years of waiting we will finally see Sean review the infamous Gigli in Cinematic Excrement episode 130.
Master of Disguise deserves the Razzie. But I’m surprised you didn’t tackle it yet. And that you’re 40. Holy crap you age well!
Yeah he doesn’t even look 30 imo.
Agreed. Also because it all but killed Dana Carvey’s then-promising acting career.
It’s the baby face
@@Yeen125 My thoughts too, at least in Ballistic some of those careers were salvaged. NO ONE benefitted from Master of Disguise. Especially Dana Carvey.
It wasn't turtle-y enough.
As a French speaking person that talks a tongue that is close to Italian and Spanish her calling him a midget makes a lot of sense, especially when you consider the implications and other senses midget has in other languages, and his own reaction to it.
She was attacking him as a person by saying that he's a small, insignificant being as a whole, including his virility. She's calling him "small" and "ugly" in every aspect unimaginable... 😊
Anik Monette -- Yes, that makes sense. I speak Spanish and understand enough Italian to get what you mean.
Nice! I had a feeling Sean would give a brief summary of Cinemadonna (a series by Todd in the Shadows, where he critiques Madge’s filmography)
This was the year they double jumped the shark when they awarded a simply bad movie and ignored Ballistic:Ecks vs. Sever (a movie so mind numbing conceived & written that even the title is nonsensical)
you know your movie sucks when the GBA game based on an early draft of the script is better
I just found your channel and binge-watched about a dozen of your videos. After having subscribed to guys like Channel Awesome (the Nostalgia Critic), the Cinema Snob, Brandon's Cult Movies, and others, I've added you to my list! Great stuff!!!
I think Todd in the Shadows said that it was obvious that Madonna wanted to make her own version of How Stella Got Her Groove Back. Y'know, Make a movie where she gets to lounge around on a beach and make out with a younger man. I completely understand that sentiment but there had to be a better way of accomplishing that goal.
Mason Allen --- Correct, yet Madonna is rich, and has money to burn.
Thank you much. I saw this the Original " Swept Away (1974) random on TV years ago...loved it. It got/gets alot of criticism, but deals in the true condition of things.
> $10 million budget
> $600k box office run
Can you say "OOF," boys and girls?
About the original Swept Away: nope, it's not a 'product of its time'. The whole point is that neither Raffaella nor Gennarino are supposed to be 'sympathetic characters'. They are both horrible. The fact that, under some social circumstances, blue collar Gennarino is a 'victim of capitalism' does not mean that he is inherently a good person. Lina Wertmüller's cinema is full of morally questionable and ambiguous characters. The original Swept Away really makes the viewer question many assumption. In the end, it is not even clear whether Raffaella really falls in love with Gennarino, or whether she was manipulating him in order to survive. Unfortunately, nowadays viewers seek answers, not questions. They want the 'good people' vs. the 'bad people', the heroes vs. the villain, all nicely tied up by 'storytelling'. Such a shame.
That can change
Given Madonna's takes on COVID-19, that "I don't want to be tested" joke sounds extra fitting now
More likely, it was about brain cells, because the test would have likely, proven that she already had none by that time.
So she's an anti-vaxxer/non-believer?
When she lived in Miami Beach she would go swimming every morning in the Intercoastal waterway between Miami Beach and Miami. The Intercoastal is mostly known for where everyone dumps the chemical toilets on their boats, where local police dumped confiscated guns and where people who snitched on drug dealers disappeared.
The local joke was "Who caught more diseases this morning - Madonna or the Intercoastal?"
@robotrix It's very-definitely close, unquestionably.
This guy has the best presenter voice
If I want to watch something about a greedy billionaire capitalist and a hairy working-class communist arguing with each other, I'd watch The Lorax. And not the animated film from Illumination, no, I mean the special directed by Dr. Suess himself. It's way more clever with its messaging, and it allows you to sympathize with both the capitalist and the communist.
italian here.
Besides forgiving you for your italian, i'm here to explain a bit of context for the original movie.
Italy has always had a big north vs south cultural clash. You can pretty much take every stereotype about blacks in american and it's pretty much the same thing here, but in italy it's so deep rooted that the third most voted party is the secessionist party (imagine trump, but even more overtly a white supremacist).
But also yeah, southern italians tend to have darker skin (or they tan really fast). And southern italy is very close to africa. That is to say, it's not odd to see assholes using "black" as a derogatory term
I was a Razzie voter one year in the mid 2010s and the way awareness od films was made was the guy who ran it having a gathering at his apartment and running a Jeremy Jahns playlist to raise awareness of bad films. In 2002 pre-UA-cam I can only imagine it being 100x harder to find things that weren't watercooler conversations (like this was)
One of my least favourite remakes ever made and I’m surprised how Sean didn’t mention how pissed off Lina was at the remake.
Ok, my fanfiction mind is giving me an idea on how to revamp the original Swept Away and make it far less problematic. In my revamp, the woman lead would be a daughter of a rich libertarian capitalist who she strongly disagrees with when it comes to politics. The male lead would be a working class black man (most likely from African descent) who just has a job of working at the yacht.
When the leads do get stranded, they figure out they should set aside whatever disputes they had and work as a team in order to survive being stranded on the deserted island. Better yet, the leads treat each other with respect and as equals, especially when they learn about the things they have in common.
When the leads do get rescued, they get together for real, and they really have no former husbands or wives to get back to.
And of course I'm a sucker for these kinds of interracial romances.
They honestly could have done that with the remake 😅
That sounds like a really interesting, heartfelt, and entertaining story, you go on and make it come true!
i would watch that lmao
I thought the joke of the original Swept Away was that Pepe was revealed as a henpecked husband.
Ah, Giancarlo Giannini, the man who played the Padishah Emperor Shaddam IV in the Dune Mini-Series.
And Rene Mathis in Casino Royale/ Quantum of Solace.
@@nekusakura6748 oh yeah!
Can’t wait for Gigli.
That day will be dreaded as much as "Freddy Got Fingered".
"Turkey Time. Gobble. Gobble".
I think the original is not an issue of "of its time" as much of misguided progressivism that should be taken as a cautionary tale for current progressive artists and critics. As I like to say, intersectionaliting is hard and it is not easy to juggle different political issues without "dropping the ball" on one of them. Sure the original does a good job on class and ideological issues but REALLY "drops the ball" on gender issues, even with a woman and feminist director, and the simple script choice of the rich brat being a woman makes the whole thing have some awkward vibes, and the fact the class warfare angle is so aggressive (which from a socialist point of view probably seemed like a good idea to the director) only makes the unintended sexist angle meaner. There's a lesson in there that aggressive satire may not be helpful sometimes and that you have to think through how your politically charged flick is approaching several issues and never be comfortable that just because you belong to x under privileged gender or racial group that you may not do a negative work even against your own group. There's a lesson to be had there.
In defense of the remake on the "black midget" thing, even in the original calling the male lead that was less about Southern Italians being darker and considered less white by their Northerner country-people and more one of those situations in which the insult used tells us more about the insulter than the insultee. It tells us that the Madonna character is a racist, ableist b*tch to the point of using racial and disability categories as insults even to people who don't belong to those categories. Sean arguing if an American in 2002 would categorise the guy as black or a midget is like hearing someone use gay as an insult and react with a "But that guy is actually straight!"; it is not about if the insultee is gay or not, it is about the insulter considering that gay can be used to just mean "bad" or "lame".
FINALLY YOU'RE REVIEWING GIGLI! I remember you saying you would do so one day back when you reviewed The Cat in The Hat! You sure took your sweet time!
The moment I heard Giancarlo Giannini played a role in the original, I had to back it up and make sure I heard that right. The guy went from the original "Swept Away" to playing Inspector Pazzi in "Hannibal" and Miguel Manzano in the 2004 "Man on Fire" film (specifying the year because it's an adaptation of a novel that previously received a film adaptation in the '80s). I have to say, if folks here haven't seen "Man on Fire" I highly recommend it. Rough subject material and not for the faint of heart but a great story nonetheless.
I just watched this movie a few days ago. This review gives me life.
Why is it whenever I'm just having the worst time you post a new episode to distract me from it?
I can't wait to see you review the Master of Disguise someday ever since Doug Walker reviewed back in 2013!
bro I've been watching your videos since I was a kid and I'm so psyched to see you're still here I'm boutta BINGE
I've been waiting so long for this.
It's like Overboard but if Kurt Russel was violent and Goldie Hawn wasn't likable.
How do you sit through the Martian and come away thinking it’s a comedy?!
As you touched on, there has long been bigotry against darker skinned Italians in Southern Italy, particularly in Sicily.
I’ve somehow never heard of either of these but abuse aside the first one seems interesting. Maybe worth the a try.
Thx for the episode~
I can't even remember where that "New York City" clip is from anymore.
This movie is basically a serious and dramatic version of "Six Days Seven Nights"... Can you retro-actively remake a movie? lol
Also, not as good as Six Day, Seven Nights.
oh yes, I needed this video
Here's a question. Is it true that this movie affected the box office revenue of "Spirited Away" because people got the titles confused?
I just have no idea, but, I'm elated that it won Best Animated Feature over Lilo, &, Stitch, that's the most overrated animated film ever, yeah, I said it, and, I'm standing by it.
You know what they say! You can teach a dog new tricks, but you can't teach Madonna how to act!
Gonna be great Saturday night!
And the whole time I'm thinking that "Who's That Girl" was Madonna's first movie
Aw man, the Razzies ignored Ballistic? For shame, man, for SHAME!
18:19 Fun fact out of all the movies that have a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes Ballistic Ecks vs. Server is the one with the most reviews.
Sean "Smeghead" Moore is in his forties. Is was in high school when I started watching him.
I really loved this movie
I have a feeling Madonna badgered poor Guy Richie into making this film. She doesn't seem that far from the character she plays in this movie.
As someone who is studying Italian your accent was actually pretty decent.
I haven’t seen all of Gigli but I’ve seen enough for me to totally cringe. I never want to hear J-Lo talk about vaginas ever again thanks
Jeez, the original Italian version of Swept Away looks like an Indie Film version of the Torgo/Margaret relationship in MANOS THE HANDS OF FATE.
18:29 - And this brings a question, Smeg. ... Why haven't you reviewed this glorious gem of unfunny crap yet?
Any chance we can get the Ecks v Sever Review brought back, good luck on Gilgi a movie that even Affleck hates more than BvS and Daredevil
Just watch the episode on Vimeo.
12:48 Madonna's an OK singer at best.
Her voice may not be amazing, but she can still sing on-key!
I don't know if anyone cares but if you've seen the animated Asterix movie called the Big Fight then you might know the composer: Michael Colombier. If you want to hear a good song from that movie google Zonked. Sadly this movie Swept Away was he's final movie to compose music for, since he passed away in 2004.
Don't feel too sad: He also composed the music for such "classics" as the Golden child and Barb wire.
Guess you could say the tide is high, but this film ain’t holding on?
You know, watching this - I'm thinking of the short Star, also with Madonna and directed by Richie, and wondering if Richie has issues with women overall, or just with Madonna...
00:05, lol!! Love that intro!
Your forty? I have to agree with you your like the Paul Rudd of UA-cam reviewers
Nice touch with the Pace picante sauce bit dude ;)
That guy looks like a drunk, Italian Andy Serkis.
A League of Their Own was great. I don't particularly like baseball or baseball movies, Geena Davis is VERY hit or miss, and this was right about when Tom Hanks was transitioning from comedies to drama. Not a promising mix, and yet it worked.
Snatch might be my favorite caper movie ever.
I loved this movie!
you got a like for the disclaimer made me chuckle btw agree with the other comments about remakes that not remake the film
Love your shirt!
Best of luck with still having your sanity and a pulse after making it through all of Gigli...
Bro I'm high asf and I thought this video was about the wallace and grommet rat movie for eight whole minutes. 💀
I think Guy Ritchie hooking up with Madonna was a huge mistake... She doesn't strike me as a kind person to be with. She seems mean and domineering. I think she pushed him into making this as a star vehicle for herself, and it almost ruined his career.
Finally!!! ^^
I've seen the review by Todd ITS for CInemadonna. It has moments where it's calling for me to scream "TURN IT OFF!" like George C Scott. Her yelling ANTHONY is the equivalent of listening to Metal Machine Music and Lars Ulrich banging his St. Trash Cans.
A Projared and cinematic excrement video on the same day, damn that's somethning
You, watch ProJared Videos??
@@BusStopProductions. his last subscriber
@@BusStopProductions. yes. And?
@@BusStopProductions. The guy was innocent and you shouldn't care about what other people watch.
Wait...you're 40?
He looks barely older than me, and I'm 24.
@@tazzreviews1578 it’s the baby face he’s like the Paul Rudd of UA-cam reviewers