Why It’s Hard to Make Real Friends in Korea | Expat Challenges & Cultural Differences

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  • Опубліковано 1 лют 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 309

  • @MrsMeganMoon
    @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +67

    Some people have been asking on social media etc. my Korean skincare sale is back from November 4th~~ so not too much longer to go

    • @SeriousPoems
      @SeriousPoems 3 місяці тому +1

      I can't wait for the rice skin care.

    • @Megan9689
      @Megan9689 3 місяці тому

      Megan, I have a request/idea for a future video. I am curious what ailments and sicknesses are common there, country-wide or broken down into Seoul/big cities and country etc? I saw a stat recently saying like 30-50% of Koreans are pre-diabetic?? Is asthma common in the big cities with the pollution? I know a lot of people wear masks and stuff. Thank you!

    • @BlancaF9495
      @BlancaF9495 3 місяці тому

      I feel like I have to in America I'm American. I feel so bad when I hear the sadness in there voice. I definitely identify with Korean people but definitely not Korean.

  • @jubiterr
    @jubiterr 3 місяці тому +445

    As a foreigner, living in Korea felt very emotionally unsafe. Like I had to put on a mask to socialize. The observations you are making help me understand why.

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +57

      Yeah. That’s the feeling I get too 😢😢

    • @hikking.with.harrison
      @hikking.with.harrison 3 місяці тому +2

      @@jubiterr emotionally unsafe?

    • @jubiterr
      @jubiterr 3 місяці тому +76

      @@hikking.with.harrison As in, it doesn’t feel safe to express your emotions. It felt like people would weaponize them against you so I would act ‘neutral’ not to disrupt their peace.

    • @FirstLadyG
      @FirstLadyG 3 місяці тому +30

      I think this is why there is a high level of suicide. I Japan and SK. They keep everything inside. I have been praying a lot for these countries. Japan, SK, China. That people will be more open and feel free to express their emotions. Talking is good. If I lived in SK or Japan I would have set up a group to help lonely people or those who can't express themselves. Just a listening ear.

    • @Lawrence_of_Asia
      @Lawrence_of_Asia 3 місяці тому +3

      Right! I made a video on it recently also.

  • @InfiniTori
    @InfiniTori 3 місяці тому +349

    I had this problem with my (Korean) fiancé. He's much better now and has really worked to improve his communication but he would hold in all these little upsets and feelings and then suddenly just yell one day seemingly out of nowhere, cos he had been holding everything in. He would insist on doing stuff for me without me asking and then be super stressed about it. e.g. if I said 'it was hot on my walk to work today' he would assume that meant I wanted him to drive me everyday while the weather was bad, and then would be stressed about it. I guess that plays into the 'favour' thing. I finally got him to understand that if I want him to do something I'll ask, and if he says no it's totally fine, and he's doing so much better at telling me when something is bothering him on a smaller scale. We still have communication issues but I'm proud of him for letting go of some of those toxic mindsets.

    • @beautyseekerlynette5812
      @beautyseekerlynette5812 3 місяці тому +35

      Relatable! My husband and I have experienced a similar journey.

    • @LunaHiddenStars
      @LunaHiddenStars 3 місяці тому +12

      Aww, well I'm glad things are getting better

    • @tossjm2803
      @tossjm2803 3 місяці тому +20

      I think this also relates to different communication styles. Even in the US, I find indirect communication difficult, but in many countries, context-focused communication is most comfortable. They are used to paying attention to everything someone says/does, guessing what they need, & feel a sense of safety when others do the same. Having to directly tell you what’s wrong may feel like you’re not being attentive to their needs, that you should already know what they want since most Korean ppl would. It would feel unfair. “Why am I being attentive when you don’t reciprocate?”
      In the same way, most Americans will find it frustrating to have to guess at what a person means to that degree. We deride it as passive aggressive & feel uneasy when we have to guess desires. We think “If you really cared about me, you wouldn’t make me jump through hoops to figure things out.”
      I think both styles are valid & culture-dependent. Since my brain thrives on directness, I’d probably drive most Korean ppl crazy & vice versa. After being born and raised in the US, indirect communication of any kind makes every interaction nerve wracking, so I’m just not compatible with many people, & close relationships with context-based cultures is probably not in the cards. Still, I think it’s nice when people give these cross-cultural relationships their all to understand each other.

    • @BannedStories101
      @BannedStories101 3 місяці тому

      Me and my partner have this issue too

    • @rachelinthelionsden
      @rachelinthelionsden 3 місяці тому +2

      Same with Chinese and Vietnamese in my personal experience .❤

  • @gabriellehollis9081
    @gabriellehollis9081 3 місяці тому +274

    You’re good at assessing social ills without being disrespectful. It helps us understand the culture better.

  • @jenaumorgan
    @jenaumorgan 3 місяці тому +233

    "People who are not jealous of your success" That point! 💯

  • @SonicaLuda
    @SonicaLuda 3 місяці тому +180

    Megan, I am loving your social commentary videos. They are informative and very well put together. You always address all topics with respect while sharing facts and research.
    You're doing a fantastic job 👏.

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +27

      ❤❤❤❤ yaaay. Thanks for watching and supporting. And I’m glad it’s coming across well~~~ I’m still nervous about it. I hope people don’t think I’m trying to be negative about Korea. Everyone knows I love Korea~~~~

    • @SonicaLuda
      @SonicaLuda 3 місяці тому +7

      @MrsMeganMoon It doesn't come off that way at all! You always express yourself with respect and obvious appreciation for the culture. You just talk about the reality that people face in their everyday lives.
      Don't be nervous, you are doing fantastic 🤗👏👏.

  • @watchmovies994
    @watchmovies994 3 місяці тому +151

    when i lived in korea i was having a hard time so started to cry in front of my host mom and she immediately ran away 😅

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +73

      😢😢 yeah. They will run away if you cry or feel emotionally upset. They don’t know how to handle it 😢😢

    • @chrystianaw8256
      @chrystianaw8256 3 місяці тому +16

      Ran away?! 😮

    • @yin_xing
      @yin_xing Місяць тому +3

      It happened to me once. I was in Spain crying (2020 pandemia) alone and couldn't hold up the loneliness and feeling of not being a local. Then, I closed the living room door and started crying out loud. I needed that. Then, a girl just knocked the door and I said sorry to disturb her. She was worried if I was OK. She brought me bread and we changed numbers. I still talk to her occasionally. I'm taiwanese. I couldn't talk this stuff to my family cause I was supposed to handle all things well. But I need to have deep and philosophical conversations. And I suffer when I see it isn't common and ppl actually don't want this kind of relationship .

  • @BlessinginBloom
    @BlessinginBloom 3 місяці тому +341

    It’s hard making friends anywhere nowadays! Fake people everywhere. And the kicker is some people are professional chameleons. You think they’re your ride or die until put in a situation that test that

    • @rennie2611
      @rennie2611 3 місяці тому +34

      Amen, I end a 25 year friendship a couple of years ago, she was secretly jealous of me😢.

    • @BlessinginBloom
      @BlessinginBloom 3 місяці тому +21

      @@rennie2611 damn! So sorry
      Same thing happened to me. It was a 12 year friendship and I invited her over to my house to have lunch. This girl went back and started telling people lies about me. It was wild

    • @opinionbytriz
      @opinionbytriz 3 місяці тому +12

      I ended at 10+ yr friendship because she couldn't respect the 1 boundary I requested (which was to ask me personal questions in private & not as a comment on SM!). She went on to tell me that I had favoritism towards my H & that I don't make time for her anymore....
      "Of course not! I've got a whole home, husband & 3 little kids." When I did invite her over my home, she would cancel. 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @Xentradi97
      @Xentradi97 3 місяці тому +6

      It's a generational thing. And the social media. Make friends n partbers for likes, subs, and follow. And dumps or ghost them just as easy.

    • @BlessinginBloom
      @BlessinginBloom 3 місяці тому +9

      @@opinionbytriz oh wow! That’s something common I noticed with certain “friends” they lack boundaries and expect you to let your life revolve around them. It’s as if a life outside of being their friend is a crime

  • @mimilove6360
    @mimilove6360 3 місяці тому +128

    As a Korean-American who grew up in the Korean community, then as an adult tried to reconnect with my roots, I agree 100% with the pts made by Megan. There are many beautiful aspects of our culture, but these are few that need to go, along with hyper materialism.

    • @nandi_m04
      @nandi_m04 3 місяці тому +12

      Woo!!! Heavy on the hyper materialism. I'm not Korean however I've come across similar videos and most of them mentioned how Korea has been found to go for materialism over everything else to make them happy or something like that. I truly found it sad plus the reference of this in kdramas and other k-content.

    • @SL-lz9jr
      @SL-lz9jr 3 місяці тому +2

      I'm Chinese American who grew up in a super insular Chinese immigrant community but now I'm more American than not. It's hard to reclaim my roots because it doesn't feel comfortable anymore. It feels foreign. My brain has been shaped and formed and molded. However, I still have empathy for my parents' cultural upbringing and I have cousins who were raised in China before immigrating to America and I hope to travel to East Asia more to reconnect with my cultural upbringing. I'll probably always be more westernized at heart but I do defend my eastern upbringing as well. While there is lot to be desired, I also see a lot of positives in East Asian culture that I think America and other western countries could adopt.

    • @jiminswriter4209
      @jiminswriter4209 3 місяці тому +2

      @@nandi_m04Most Koreans are not materialistic. There is a portion that are, but they do not represent the majority. Too many videos focus on that part.

  • @CynthiaMaier-uh2ru
    @CynthiaMaier-uh2ru 3 місяці тому +58

    A lack of emotional maturity lead to many of these issues. Unfortunately many people grow old without growing up. You are way ahead of the game. Well Done You ! 💫❤

  • @jennymcgraw855
    @jennymcgraw855 3 місяці тому +96

    Now I can understand why you loved having your sister visiting you in Korea. I'm sure you loved the closeness you developed with your sister over the years and it felt like " home" and it felt like a safe place for you.

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +46

      I really did. She left and it felt sad again :(

    • @unapologeticfeminine
      @unapologeticfeminine 3 місяці тому +2

      @@MrsMeganMoonI hate that I can pick up on peoples energies so well. I will be praying that miraculously, unexpectedly you will meet friends who feel like home. You are so deserving sis 🙏🏽

  • @ST_Sandz
    @ST_Sandz 3 місяці тому +87

    I love this quote "I was born to treat the janitor with the same respect as the CEO." In my country, we believe and grew up knowing that everyone deserves respect.

    • @Antosza
      @Antosza Місяць тому +1

      Well, we should respect janitors more than CEOs. They are hardworking people who makes other lives more pleasant, unlike greedy rich capitalists in higher positions, who exploits and robes us.

  • @MrsJasminJo
    @MrsJasminJo 3 місяці тому +132

    I cant imagine having to have this barrier between ages. All my friends are older than me. Some a few years, others 10 years...

    • @moni_lucky1010
      @moni_lucky1010 3 місяці тому +2

      Yeah, that would suck

    • @TheNinjapancake14
      @TheNinjapancake14 3 місяці тому

      No younger friends? Looks like there’s a barrier here

    • @Abena1709
      @Abena1709 3 місяці тому +1

      ​@@TheNinjapancake14she's the younger friend so it goes both ways.

  • @christina4616
    @christina4616 3 місяці тому +90

    I've heard that third concept described as 'putting on your own oxygen mask before helping other's with theirs'... that has stuck with me

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +16

      That’s a good way to explain it! Wish I thought of that during the video 😂😂. I’m over here talking about water in cups 😅😅

    • @edwinatakasaki2258
      @edwinatakasaki2258 3 місяці тому +3

      @@MrsMeganMoon Your analogy with the water in cups made sense to me. If your cup runneth over, one can feel compelled to share the bounty, depending on one's mood and/or character. However, if there is scarcity in your cup, the act of scrabbling to fill one's cup can consume your time/energy. The acts are in direct opposition, sharing vs acquisitiveness, positive vs negative, yin vs yang. Of course, life is never just black and white, and the acts themselves can be tainted. That reactor your found is a philosopher, you think?

    • @christina4616
      @christina4616 3 місяці тому +4

      @@MrsMeganMoon I think the cups analogy will stick with me too. I think you did a great job of showing how there is a difference in helping people with consideration to yourself and helping people in spite of yourself. I think you showed how, while intentions are good in both situations, the results are very different. Helping people in spite of yourself is not sustainable and leads to resentment and weakened relationships while helping people with consideration to yourself is sustainable and results in spreading love and strengthening relationships.

  • @maryjanewesterlund9958
    @maryjanewesterlund9958 3 місяці тому +49

    I’m really enjoying your social commentary videos. You’re a smart and talented woman and you’ve got a lot of common sense to add to the mix.
    “Hard to Make Friends” discussion is a good one. I’m 77 years old, have some lifelong friends and some newer friendships, and, I’m WELL PAST having issues with making or keeping friendships. But, as long as you live, you need to keep your sense of sensitivity and be perceptive about how others are feeling and maybe reacting to whatever you’re saying/doing.
    One thing that you mentioned that I also think is quite sad, is that older and younger individuals can’t have close relationships. A big part of my mature years has been mentoring mostly young women (a couple of young men) I used to teach and I still have a lot of desire to help students on those areas of their career where I have a lot experience, and, frankly, knowledge. There aren’t many weeks that go by that I don’t meet some talented young person, usually high school or college age, who can use encouragement and coaching. It is so rewarding, and, I have a lot of young friends who keep me “young” with their interests and current thinking.
    Young and old Koreans are missing a lot by not sharing their time, interests and experiences.

  • @Symphonia16
    @Symphonia16 3 місяці тому +44

    That cup metaphor was so good. Hurt my heart to think of that sad nearly empty cup still pouring out

  • @BaileyBlurbs
    @BaileyBlurbs 3 місяці тому +39

    These Korean social commentary videos are SO good!! I love seeing your experiences come through in these talks and how it’s shaped you over the last decade you’ve lived abroad.

  • @grtlg0rl
    @grtlg0rl 3 місяці тому +54

    Something that always annoyed me was many people wanted to know about me but wouldn’t speak about themselves. Which always made me feel unsafe because I will tell you one thing, then several other people will know that but I wasn’t able to know anything about them. Of course this isn’t the case with everyone but I learned to stop volunteering information because there was no mutual exchange.

    • @SR-mk7it
      @SR-mk7it 3 місяці тому +10

      I love how you phrased it as "volunteering information". It's a habit I sometimes do automatically because I like talking to different people but I'm starting to realise, like you stated, that the conversations were not mutual.

  • @musicbkim
    @musicbkim 3 місяці тому +51

    I'm Korean who's been living in Australia for many many years. I've noticed Americans are a lot more expressive/vocal when it comes to personal emotions amd thoughts in general compared to British or Australians in general. We had many American exchange students when I was at Uni and it was very interesting to notice the difference. Americans never hesitated to speak their minds with other students or even with the lecturers more than most Australian students.

    • @KukkaKo
      @KukkaKo 3 місяці тому +19

      I noticed that too about the Americans I've met here in Finland! It's refreshing to have conversations with people who are not holding their emotions back and although I'm not very fluent in English, I feel like I've audibly expressed myself more in English than I ever have in Finnish lol

    • @caribbeanstrawhat
      @caribbeanstrawhat 3 місяці тому +7

      Sometimes if the teacher is chill enough we ask them about their day or their family and just have causal talks as a class before/during/after a lesson 😭

    • @alex.profi27
      @alex.profi27 3 місяці тому

      Americans speak just to for the sake of speaking. And that s not a good thing. They learned to just be loud and aggresive so they can intimidate you and come off as strong bc that will make them powerful in other people s minds.

    • @SunshineKamaloni
      @SunshineKamaloni 3 місяці тому +1

      I couldn't agree more @musicbkim! I moved to Australian without realising how "repressed" the culture is here too.

    • @musicbkim
      @musicbkim 3 місяці тому +3

      @SunshineKamaloni I never thought of it as "repressive" before. It just feels normal to me. The American students seemed too overwhelming to me and many other locals here in Australia. It's all about what you get used to. Ppl usually feel more comfortable with whatever they are used to.

  • @SamriBliss
    @SamriBliss 3 місяці тому +40

    11:00 I learned that Korea as a peninsula used to have/still has a CASTE system within a century ago.
    The constant need to keep things in a hierarchy must come from the epigenetics of caste systems.
    EDIT to add: this info is helpful in understanding my Vietnamese American husband more.

  • @SSM654
    @SSM654 3 місяці тому +14

    Friends should always be a blessing. If they are a "curse" they aren't your friends.

  • @marlene1708
    @marlene1708 3 місяці тому +34

    I love these sit down videos

    • @Megan9689
      @Megan9689 3 місяці тому +1

      Back to her channel roots back in the day! I missed them too!

  • @Miyankochan
    @Miyankochan 3 місяці тому +17

    As with a lot of other topics in Korea, only appearance matters. Yes, they APPEAR to be respectful and mostly because they "have to be".

    • @How2bGee
      @How2bGee 3 місяці тому +1

      I think this plays into that term “Model Minority” When is comes to Asian history in American culture

  • @gloriarios9076
    @gloriarios9076 3 місяці тому +87

    Some people even in the US don't respect boundaries. You have to be very vocal about it. Some people act like they don't uunderstand. That's when you cut ties.

    • @serenity8901
      @serenity8901 3 місяці тому +1

      💯

    • @jennd1298
      @jennd1298 2 місяці тому +5

      That's more of an individual issue though. As a society that kind of behavior isn't seen as positive or acceptable.

  • @lillianlouie4284
    @lillianlouie4284 3 місяці тому +9

    Navigating cultural expectations can be challenging indeed. Glad you recognizes differences. Megan, your beautiful green top brings out the olive in your eyes!

  • @ItsLycheee
    @ItsLycheee 3 місяці тому +20

    1:17 If anyone’s interested in reading more about these different types of friendships just look up Aristotle’s views on friendships. He literally talked about these different types and what they do for you. I had to read a lot about it for a philosophy class I took last semester😅

  • @haziewhims977
    @haziewhims977 3 місяці тому +9

    I love these videos! Your maturity, transparency and perspective is always refreshing and appreciated. Each topic makes me want to take a deep dive about the conversations around these subjects and learn more after watching. A small request if possible, but if you're ever able to share links to the videos or references you mention in the videos I'd truly appreciate it!

  • @moolikeachicken
    @moolikeachicken 3 місяці тому +8

    I think these videos are the best series you've ever done. So honest but also still respectful. Its great to hear about all your experiences and stuying youve done about each topic!

  • @BlessinginBloom
    @BlessinginBloom 3 місяці тому +50

    I’m loving these sit down videos❤
    Is it too greedy if a podcast is requested?😅

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +47

      If these videos do well I could think of doing a podcast~~ ❤❤❤

    • @BlessinginBloom
      @BlessinginBloom 3 місяці тому

      @@MrsMeganMoon yaaayyy🤩

    • @Megan9689
      @Megan9689 3 місяці тому

      Like her channel videos back in the day! I missed them too!!!

    • @DrAmber2004
      @DrAmber2004 3 місяці тому +2

      @@MrsMeganMoonI love your calming voice. You would do well with a podcast.

    • @OTnerd7
      @OTnerd7 3 місяці тому

      Please do a podcast!!!!!!

  • @Pollo.a.la.crema.
    @Pollo.a.la.crema. 3 місяці тому +4

    Your voice is so relaxing! Thanks for not yelling at me like most UA-camrs

  • @beautyseekerlynette5812
    @beautyseekerlynette5812 3 місяці тому +6

    Really insightful! Thank you for sharing. I've been fortunate to find some friendships in Korea, but I've also noticed some of these things -- the lack of respect *really* irritates me, in particular. Also, the struggle with communicating and sharing insides is so real -- my husband can struggle with this too, I notice, and it's something both of us are working on. Relationships are just so much better when you learn better communication!

  • @shortycastella
    @shortycastella 3 місяці тому +8

    This is a really good video. I’ve seen these things, even with my husband (married for over 2 years), who has lived in the west for close to a decade now. There are things he has definitely gotten better at. I did want to add something else though that wasn’t mentioned:
    Koreans (generally speaking) don’t really make a lot of friends in adulthood unless it’s a significant other. Most of their solid friendships usually come from elementary/middle/high school, or army service (if they’re a guy). It’s like Koreans only make friends with people who have been to hell and back alongside them. It’s all about the amount of Jeong you have with a person or group. My husband still struggles with this to this day. He is a nice enough guy, can have perfect conversations in English now, and is familiar enough with western culture to get by. However, there are times where I’ve said to him “why don’t you meet up with (local friend he hasn’t seen in a while)? I’m sure they’d be down to have a beer or something” but no, he doesn’t want to make the effort. He doesn’t give the opportunity a chance. He usually pines for his high school friends back in Korea. It’s like unless you have some concrete commonality or history, it’s likely your friendship won’t develop much further.
    And don’t even get me started on the stigma of having opposite gender friends in Korea or in Korean communities abroad. Because of the large gender gap, most people from Korea don’t believe men and women can be platonic friends. If you have an opposite gender friend, people get suspicious, even though nothing is going on. There is enough separation between men and women socially in Korea that it’s hard for them to imagine a truly platonic opposite gender friendship without there being some sort of ulterior (sexual) motive going on. And friend groups don’t mix either. Like husband has his friends and wife has her friends and never the twain shall meet.
    Just wanted to give some extra food for thought here. Great video!

  • @sarahi1149
    @sarahi1149 3 місяці тому +7

    girl i’m not korean nor do i have interest in korea or visiting i just love learning about different cultures so this was interesting ❤

  • @deborahhlondo2594
    @deborahhlondo2594 3 місяці тому +4

    Fortunately this is a common issue across cultures but this is so good and especially for millennials across races i think we need to hear more of this. I hope you can come up with a podcast ❤

  • @nalaa9618
    @nalaa9618 3 місяці тому +3

    Love how you always shout out Korean UA-camrs/Shows to us. Dennis is a great watch, as well as the psychology show from your last video

  • @speakingheaven
    @speakingheaven 3 місяці тому +2

    Happy to see at the Afro Festival with Aisha Ba!!! How about a collaboration with your two families and Dianna in Korea. Would love to see your kids and spouses get together for a picnic!

  • @kalmtraveler
    @kalmtraveler Місяць тому +2

    This is always a curious topic to me. I've had quite close Korean friends for about a decade so far and the only 'quirk' I've seen in most of them (coming from an American perspective) is that they often don't want to meet each other. They're fine hanging out with me and any other foreigners I bring along but often are very hesitant if not outright refusing to hang out with my other Korean friends if they haven't already met.

  • @zanderC5953
    @zanderC5953 2 місяці тому +2

    You are so on point about the boundary pushing in Korea. It was a cultural shock, still is, about living in Korea. It is definitely a cultural thing rather than purely a language thing. I recieve this kind of advice/boundary pushing from some of my Korean/ Korean American friends as well. Especially if they were raised by Korean parents. It feels natural and normal because we are treated like close family. Age is also something that must be continually respected (oldest must treat meals, youngest must listen to advice and patiently hear the oldest's opinions). You are so on point, Megan❤

  • @nerakami1
    @nerakami1 3 місяці тому +2

    absolutely love this direction of your videos... adore seeing your two cutie patooties too but the mix-up is cool. Also, think you're hitting all the right notes exploring our societal psychological conditioning..

  • @sama5867
    @sama5867 3 місяці тому +1

    4 minutes in and this is an incredibly eye opening video. ive struggled a lot with my korean boyfriends emotions and i didnt put it together until now that his parents grew up right after the war. thank you for teaching me more about my significant others family.

  • @CheapskateChicana
    @CheapskateChicana 3 місяці тому +6

    Great video Megan! I’m really loving these commentary videos because I love learning about how other societies work and think.
    I know he works a lot but I’d be interested in hearing Mr. Moon’s commentary on your observations. It could be the more lighthearted stuff like crazy Korean reddit stories that you find 😄

  • @janicebolosan119
    @janicebolosan119 3 місяці тому +16

    Regardless of any age, respect is earned!!

    • @treebles
      @treebles 3 місяці тому +15

      i feel the opposite ~ respect should be given to everyone until they do something to prove otherwise.

  • @eliskavaskova3692
    @eliskavaskova3692 3 місяці тому +1

    love this social commentary videos you make these day!
    also, everytime I talk to someone fresh in Korea talking about how many Korean friends they have I just think to myself "do you, tho?" it's a sad reality

  • @Marianne-k4u
    @Marianne-k4u 3 місяці тому +8

    I find your videos very interesting and insightfull. I come from a society that is different both from the korean and the american, mostly the korean. We have a very flat hierachy, so this is interesting for me to hear about. I must admit that it makes me appreciate the way i live more though :) The people I surround myself with are quite frank and open with no agendas and we speak our thoughts freely. We don't have to have the same oppinion on everything to be friends and we respect that not all are the same. It actually gives some good discussions that can sometimes end in us agreeing to not agree on that specific subject, but the respect is still there.

  • @GT-vi5dh
    @GT-vi5dh 3 місяці тому +2

    Thank you so much for sharing. I plan on living in Korea at some point so this is especially valuable, and I'm also just glad to have insight about another culture.

  • @mcn6541
    @mcn6541 3 місяці тому +4

    Thanks Megan for the topic . Just from reading some of the comments, I see that some people confuse friendliness and friendship. It is different when you have acquaintances or professional relationships but Megan did make the effort explain that the hardest one is the closest or intimate friendships. Of course there are personality and upbringing considerations that are not culturally based. An introvert will be so in any culture but creating personal connections is different than nice people inviting you over for a meal once in a while.

  • @verdfromage7595
    @verdfromage7595 3 місяці тому +9

    I came to live in Iran and my husbands' family are like this too, overly polite at first and then overly intrusive. It's really annoying. His cousin always reminds me to stay in my place and that her parents and her family have priority over me. So yeah this video is totally relatable.

    • @devih9134
      @devih9134 3 місяці тому +1

      Holy cow I can only imagine how stressful that is !

  • @autumnnoelle9658
    @autumnnoelle9658 3 місяці тому +1

    I really enjoyed this video, it helped me understand more of why as a foreigner it is so hard to make Korean friends. Definitely some things to consider

  • @estellec5340
    @estellec5340 3 місяці тому +4

    I love these types of videos! Keep making them! It's incredibly interesting

  • @EuriOh
    @EuriOh 28 днів тому

    These videos are so helpful for me to think and reflect on, as a Korean-American, to better understand my parents. Even though I am pretty "Korean" myself, as I speak it and live in on the daily. This video in particular is still eye-opening! Thanks for the great content, Megan!

  • @user-ec4nb8nz4l
    @user-ec4nb8nz4l 3 місяці тому +6

    looove the lace shirt. Love your videos!

  • @callunya
    @callunya 3 місяці тому +2

    Thank you for sharing! I’ve really been loving these videos about Korean society you’ve been doing recently. Very eye opening and provides a lot to reflect on. Love what you added to this conversation!

  • @alc9224
    @alc9224 3 місяці тому +2

    Your emotional intelligence is amazing Megan!❤

  • @wgima3857
    @wgima3857 3 місяці тому +3

    Love these vlogs... so true... all the points you have mentioned on all these vlogs. Foreigners in love with Korea, only realize the truth of Korea after living here for some time. So many cultural differences... thinking is soooo different. Much room for misunderstandings.

  • @Marie-eh6je
    @Marie-eh6je 3 місяці тому +10

    ***My husband and I always wanted our children to be able to talk to us about ANYTHING. It wasn’t always the most comfortable answering questions and having certain conversations with them as they were growing up. However we always told them we would rather they be completely honest with us and although we mite not like what we hear or agree, it would be better for them. Our children now range from 28-22. We have 3 children and 2 grandchildren. I have the closest relationship with them. They never had to lie to us. We talk about everything. They are things I still cringe in my head about though. lol My husband and I figured if certain questions were in their heads, it was better they came to us no matter what and we answered them correctly rather have them go to their friends or other adults and get the wrong answers or be led in the wrong direction. One of the best discussions we could have made.***

  • @gladiola8126
    @gladiola8126 3 місяці тому +4

    You have amazing insight and understanding! Thanks for sharing your heart and knowledge ❤🙏🏻

  • @johanfrancois62
    @johanfrancois62 3 місяці тому +2

    It’s funny you talking about this today. I was having a conversation with my son about this yesterday because we are planning to come on vacation in Korea next year and my son could not believe that people think that way.

  • @dulcespt
    @dulcespt 3 місяці тому +13

    I been waiting for this TT

    • @MrsMeganMoon
      @MrsMeganMoon  3 місяці тому +4

      Yaaay❤❤❤

    • @LoveyourselfKK
      @LoveyourselfKK 3 місяці тому +4

      @@dulcespt I love the sit down videos where she talks to us!!!

  • @sireis116
    @sireis116 3 місяці тому +2

    I'm loving these videos so much. It helps to understand better the why. And you do it in a respectful way. Thank you so much! Hope you make a more in depth video about giving birth in Korea in public hospitals, as I've seen some videos with traumatizing birth stories. Or moms that home school because they don't want their kids to suffer from being treated differently. Which is sad. I do hope gets better with time. All the best to your beautiful family ✨

  • @madhappy77
    @madhappy77 2 місяці тому

    omg this makes so much sense!!! thank you for this video Megan ❤

  • @elusivemayfly7534
    @elusivemayfly7534 3 місяці тому +7

    Thanks for your insight as always, Megan! I admire lots of cultures, but something I admire about American culture is exactly what you said. That you can be close friends with people of any age, “class,” ethnic / cultural origin, etc.
    At least where I am in the South, many people are still pretty open, and I’ve made some lasting friendships from stuff like asking to pet someone’s dog or connecting over a t-shirt with a store clerk. You know how it is as a Southern lady yourself, of course!
    I am speaking about the South because that’s where I have always lived, but I want to add that I’ve found really kind folks everywhere I have traveled in the country. I just try not to overwhelm them with my folksy exuberance right out the gate 😂
    You have such great energy, I am sure people are drawn to you wherever you go 😊

    • @treebles
      @treebles 3 місяці тому

      i like how you describe it as “folksy exuberance”
      i recently moved to utah, i didnt quite appreciate just how much “folksy exuberance” i had until i would see peoples faces be like ‘why is this girl talking to me?’ so then i learned to say, ‘oh, hello, i am from austin, texas’ to help explain my friendly characteristics.
      thats within the same country, so i can only imagine if i moved abroad.

  • @yeoreumdaisy
    @yeoreumdaisy 3 місяці тому +2

    I definately get this... i have also been here since 2011 and i genuienly relate to this. There are alot of extra obstacles when it comes to culture, and expat life in general.

  • @withpeacelove366
    @withpeacelove366 3 місяці тому +5

    I've personally found that people in America are the same way though that Megan was describing in the beginning. It seems like it's common for people to ghost someone or hold something in and later blow up at someone instead of just openly talking about feelings and issues. I'm supposedly on the spectrum, but I'm very into open communication about feelings and I find it difficult that other people aren't. People seem to prefer people who are excited and overly happy all of the time and they prefer to keep things shallow. This has just been my experience personally, but hey, it could just be me.

  • @charmac3660
    @charmac3660 3 місяці тому

    Love the new info style podcasts and “shorts”! You are really rocking your life in S Korea!

  • @safir3phoen1x
    @safir3phoen1x 3 місяці тому +5

    It’s already difficult making friends and keeping in touch with them in New York, I cannot possibly imagine what it is in Korea 😮‍💨🤧

  • @MrsPetal
    @MrsPetal Місяць тому

    My husband and I have that wonderful, beautiful, blossoming friendship that is constantly evolving.

  • @marythr2617
    @marythr2617 3 місяці тому +2

    Amazing content Megan!! Keep it up!! Absolutely lovely info!!!

  • @itsjustL16
    @itsjustL16 3 місяці тому +2

    I LOVE THESE SIT DOWN VIDEOSSSSSSS. CAUSE honestly I can relate😢 its so hard to make proper friends

  • @rachelinthelionsden
    @rachelinthelionsden 3 місяці тому +5

    Anger is almost justified because it’s the sign that things are off. But, anger toward someone else due to lack of communication usually shows up with behaviours, like discarding, devaluing, smear campaigning, dismissal, etc. Let the anger lead us to more internal insight and hopefully pas these things on to our kiddos!❤

  • @its_Queencapri
    @its_Queencapri 3 місяці тому +1

    I love, love, love these talking videos. ❤❤❤

  • @Ivy-v8j
    @Ivy-v8j 3 дні тому

    Thank you so much. Really need to hear that quote

  • @SirAgravaine
    @SirAgravaine 3 місяці тому +45

    As an Indian person, I think a lot of Asians were raised by severely traumatized parents. Think about how messed up the 20th century was for our grandparents, great-grandparents. People had little to no recourse. And I think that that's why so many Asians pursue wealth and status, because that keeps you "safe". It doesn't, but that's the attempt. And it also prevents other people from seeing your weakness. My mother refuses to ask for help because she doesn't want people to talk about her behind her back. She would rather burn herself up than ask for help, legitimately.

    • @alex.profi27
      @alex.profi27 3 місяці тому

      The 20th century was traumatizing for everyone, not only asians. Eastern europeans suffered more than you, but we have f up parents, so we re also raised like that

  • @Anniebeeee247
    @Anniebeeee247 3 місяці тому

    Love hearing your perspective on Korean culture. I’ve learned a lot about myself and my parents, as Korean Americans. You’re amazing and appreciate these videos!

  • @amisusu
    @amisusu 2 місяці тому

    I love you doing these type of videos. Keep it up Mrs.Moon!!

  • @SpringNotes
    @SpringNotes 3 місяці тому

    Thank you for this insightful, social commentary on Korea. There's always a pros and cons to every country.

  • @janifleming
    @janifleming 3 місяці тому +3

    Love all the content, but I especially love and missed the talking videos. Takes me back to 2016 when i first subscribed🙂

  • @sakyqueen
    @sakyqueen 3 місяці тому

    Love listening to you talk while I meal prep! ^^ more talky videos!!

  • @makotokino4533
    @makotokino4533 3 місяці тому +1

    Yes thank you Megan that was so insightful I really enjoyed this video if you do more like this I would really appreciate it it makes you understand both sides and different people from different opinions I appreciate it so much thank you for this video

  • @aggizoi916
    @aggizoi916 3 місяці тому

    Love all your videos , they are so authentic . No fairytale stories, only the reality. Sooo interesting ❤

  • @amberbe849
    @amberbe849 3 місяці тому

    Thank you so much Megan for doing these deeper dives into Korean Culture videos. I watch multiple Korean UA-cam channels so its always great to have some context. I would love for you to do a video about what its like being a women of color living in Korea. What have your experiences been with older Korean's, how are your travel experiences, how have Koreans reacted to your marriage to a Korean man, hair care in Korea, just general day to day stuff. I'm also an African American woman who would love to travel around the world so its always great to hear someone's experiences in foreign countries.

  • @Michelle-qs2tc
    @Michelle-qs2tc 3 місяці тому

    Love these types of videos! Keep them coming 😊 you’re so well spoken!

  • @biekevanriel5231
    @biekevanriel5231 3 місяці тому +1

    very interesting, again,bless girl❤

  • @georgiacadeau
    @georgiacadeau 3 місяці тому

    Thank you for another great video! I love hearing about what you have to say!! Please make even longer videos (if possible hehe), you could talk about anything and I’d be entertained 😆🫶🏾

  • @ketoles7777
    @ketoles7777 11 днів тому

    Really appreciate your content. TY

  • @myshirayne2382
    @myshirayne2382 3 місяці тому +1

    This makes a lot of sense. I 🤔 💬 think it will assist people that do enjoy friendships to maintain them.

  • @wombmate1669
    @wombmate1669 3 місяці тому +3

    You were raised right ❤

  • @tisasmith6727
    @tisasmith6727 3 місяці тому

    That was deep and very interesting. Thanks for the insight.

  • @y0shimoshi
    @y0shimoshi 3 місяці тому +1

    Loving these videos ❤

  • @OliveDemetrius
    @OliveDemetrius 3 місяці тому +3

    I love this deep thinking adult exploration. Womanism is expansive.

  • @sebastianfuller
    @sebastianfuller 3 місяці тому +8

    The barrier and heirarchy, especially with age and socioeconomic status would be such an issue for me because so many of the ppl I get along with are older. I'm literally close with someone who was my math instructor in college and she's in her 40s and I'm in my 20s and I just couldn't do that there

  • @Doloresntheforest
    @Doloresntheforest 3 місяці тому +2

    Love this kinda content from you. ❤

  • @SaffariRose
    @SaffariRose 3 місяці тому +5

    Ironic how boundaries can easily get crossed when friendship happens but deep connections are no where to be found 😂

  • @francisimanuel8824
    @francisimanuel8824 3 місяці тому +1

    Oh wow, you just helped me to understand a lot that has happened. I live in a K Town, in the UK. I am a blasian married to a Korean man with a child. It has not always been easy with some other moms😅😅😅
    Some things are similar to my culture others I was unaware of.

  • @CJG1419
    @CJG1419 3 місяці тому +7

    My MIL is Japanese and I see some of that. She has lived here many years but her early life was in China and Japan so she carries similarities. I don’t think she has a problem with deeper relationships though. Edit: she loves Korean shows and we’ve watched some with her, now I know why they are always slapping each other lol!

  • @book_worm22
    @book_worm22 3 місяці тому +17

    Its hard to make real friends in the US too! Especially those that would reciprocate the things that you do from them. Its hard out here 😢

    • @JacquelineWilliams-mc6lc
      @JacquelineWilliams-mc6lc 3 місяці тому +1

      It not hard in the USA you just have to accept people for who they are if you make one friend that good

  • @soonzach4017
    @soonzach4017 2 місяці тому

    Good morning Megan, you are a always so interesting young lady, 🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️👋

  • @E_swi
    @E_swi 3 місяці тому

    Watching videos like these help me understand my Korean mother. A lot of times I don’t understand her behaviors

  • @sky_horangi
    @sky_horangi 3 місяці тому +1

    Thank you for such well-made video! It is very precise and even from my personal experience, I can relate to many things that you mentioned.
    Also, what I've noticed when it comes to hanging out or spending quality time with friends or potential friends, Korean people really prefer spending money and consuming in different forms. Like for example, back in my country, we would have a stroll in the park or even neighbourhood and still have a great time, but in Korea it's mostly having lunch, then going to a café, etc, so every time it's more or less the same pattern.
    Also if you're a girl, many times Korean girls would kinda point out that you're prettier with makeup on, or freckles might not be that pretty etc, which is similar with what you mentioned, over interfering in other person's life.
    Then most guys would only want to date you, and almost every one would say "there's so friends between man and a woman".
    Many people regardless of their gender would only want to meet you for just a couple of times, because you're a foreigner and they consider you 신기하다 but have no intentions for deeper connection or friendship.
    Cultural differences inevitably impact the relationships, but even still many young people behave conservatively, or have a "fixed image about a foreigner", and look you through it, not seeing you as you are.
    Thank you for the great video and I hope everyone living in Korea as a foreigner or a person of different background have a safe and pleasant life in Korea :)

  • @nayalove13
    @nayalove13 3 місяці тому +7

    Je préfère être Solitaire...mes moments de solitude se font agréables😊

  • @JorinT-u6y
    @JorinT-u6y 3 місяці тому

    I'm luvingthesesnew topicvids .You explained it c=very well and hit the nail on the head that Girl, you make me appreciate living uinthe US where these intensive ettiquetts don't exist. Makes living that much easier.