DON'T WASTE YOUR PAIN - 3 Things To Do When You've Been Hurt by RC Blakes
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- Опубліковано 5 вер 2024
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Thank you as always....for your wisdom.
Thank you for your wisdom. I needed it. Your guidance is so important and I truly value your advice.
Pastor ... Pls provide time stamps...
@Rc Blake’s, jr please create a detailed video on how to overcome parental abandonment. Thank you
Shared
I never had boundaries because I thought everyone was like me and had a good heart. Pain taught me how to establish boundaries.
Same !!!!
Amen
I had no boundaries with my family . I gave them a free pass just because they were family . When I finally got tired, I put up boundaries and then they interpreted that as disrespect.
Same here in the name of "love". But that's the old me. We know better now
Same! I had to learn the hard way
This year pain has taught me that my decisions comes with consequences, so I have to make better choices and be smarter by making decisions that are best for my wellbeing.
🥰💘💕
Same here
👐👐👐 Hallelujah 💯💯💯💯💯💯
Let the things that hurt you make you a stronger and better person. Forgive never forget, but don’t let that healed wound keep hurting you by holding on to how you got the wound in the first place. Sometimes God will remove the very thing you kept putting before him. If you trust and believe in God then you know he won’t remove something or someone without blessing you with better. The Lord is good and his mercy endures forever and ever! Amen 🙏🏽
Amen, and you spoke this so eloquently and truthfully. God Bless
@@ruthwells3990 Thank You 😊
Amen!
Amen ! Very Encouraging Message,Stay Blessed.🙏🏾🙏🏾❤️
Amen and Amen thank you Jesus
My hurt came from my husband of 35 years, when I found out that he had fathered 2 children outside of our marriage, 2 different women, and the lady he's living with now I've known her for years. I've gotten over the hurt and the bitterness, Thanks be to God. It's been 7 years now.
How do you not feel bitter about this when you’re almost reminded every day, because you have children together?
I’m asking because I struggle with this…I forgave my husband and his pregnant girlfriend, but it hurts when my children are with them and they now have the family that I had for years! When will God restore what was removed from me?
I feel you. My now ex husband of 24 years also had a baby. Still struggling with it.
I was totally blindsided
God bless you sister, to God be the glory 🙌🙌
I wish you more healing and comfort. I'm happy to hear that you are ok sweetheart❤️
This just happened to me. Someone inflicted the same pain on me that was done to him. Then I finally realized he was playing me and that I was the rebound. I was the distraction. And then he went back to her and let her back in his life after going on and on about how toxic she was. It hurts when you realize that you were used. But I walked away holding my head high knowing that God has a better man for me. I learned that I am worth more than being someone’s option or convenience. And now I know what red flags to look for and to not ignore. Growth!
Yes, its very painful to know that you have been used, esp when you came in with an open heart----if you can get past the pain of your pride, you will be able to see that he was not meant for you, he was a lesson to be learned---that man will go on to inflict more pain on his current relations that are not in line with God---look around you! There really are men who respect what God is about---you just needed the lesson to open your eyes!!
At one time, I was painting red flags green.
@@vegigirl7440 this is so true, I’m in the process of leaving my pain behind and starting to understand the lesson, it’s difficult because it’s like a cycle, some days are better than others, specially when you realize that he didn’t have good intentions. It’s a journey.
Be comforted in knowing that his ex didn’t win back anything good.
“God Teach Me What I Need To Learn”
Amen 🙏🏾
Amen 🙏🏽
amen !! and not be bitter
Pain is a teacher.
Whew
It definitely is!
Preach!
Its just so unfair the hurt we endure, especially when we're a good person. So now we have to heal the pain someone else inflicted on us.
4 reals, I feel the same way… but I’m learning now that I better use that pain to learn to not fall on that same mistake again…. Good luck to you on your journey to healing honey.
@@Sonrhiza117 Thank you. You too 🙏❤
It hurts so bad
I learned and I can’t be an emotional dumping ground for someone that continually disrespects, lie, hurt my feelings and feel no remorse. I’ll be looking at him from a standpoint of compassion and pour it into his cup while mine is constantly being drained. That’s what I learned. Even though I’m hurting right now to the core I thank God for showing me who he was and revealing that all he gave me was a vision of love. He need God and therapy. I can’t anymore. Thank you God!
Bless you 💕. I applaud you! I'm dealing with the same exact thing myself. Reciprocity is always a must. We cannot be the only ones Giving! Self Love 💞.
I hope you are doing better! I hope you stayed strong and didn't give up on yourself!
I'm preparing myself to breakup the same, toxic relationship and it feels like there's no perfect moment for doing this.
I try to learn and get stronger every day and I know one day, when I'm ready, it will happen!
Bless you 😇❤
Amen I felt your words I’m going thru it now
This definitely spoke to me through my current pain. May god continue to bless you and everyone in agreement with your statement. The best is yet to come for us all! Thank you 🙏🏾
I was ready to get myself to get burnt so he can be happy
I just realized at 39 years old that I’ve been living in hurt and don’t know how to get over it. I am currently in the process of reprogramming my mind to look at it differently. I’ve been hurting for a long time and just waking up my mind to think differently
1. Learn from it (a. We learn our relational and emotional boundaries; b. We learn about the person who hurt us; c. We learn what not to do to other people); 2. We should grow through it (a. You should grow beyond being affected by certain things; b. You should grow past being easily deceived in the future; c. You should grow out of bitterness and into compassion); 3. Go from the pain.
I'm so ready! I listen to these videos with pen, paper, and highlighters.
Me too, I have so many notes and are applying them daily. Thank you pastor RC💕
Likewise... 100% KNOWLEDGE HE SPEAKS. LOVE HIS PURPOSE...
I just started listening…but I’m doing the same thing
Yes!!!
How do we go from the pain? a) Reconcile the relationships what can be saved; b) Release the people who are toxic; c) Redirect your focus to positive issues.
Don’t waste your pain. Priceless Jewels of lessons are rolled up in every teardrop 🦋
🙏🙏🙏
Since listening to your channel 90 days ago, I am a wiser woman, stronger, faster and better. Thank you Pastor Blakes, I know a lot about myself and my past relationships and the mistakes I made. My most recent discovery is when you and Lisa were talking about things you cannot give a man; you cannot give an irresponsible man, responsibility. You cannot take care of a man and thinking that he will love you. You cannot give a man God and make him a Christian, he is a player that goes to Church. 💎💎💎
So true. I did all of that and married him. Now he is angry that I want a divorce 🤯
So true
I missed that video thanks for posting that message "you cannot give an irresponsible man responsibility" I having been struggling with wanting and abusive person to admit wrong but he is never going take responsible yet he is quick to threaten to sue or commit his best friend for psychological issues for throwing his furniture when he was 100% responsible for triggering her he was the one who came after her first She was responding out of constant attack likely trying to protect herself.
Once You Get Free From The Yolk of Bondage, Don't Get Entangled Again, Move Away From It; Thank you Pastor Blakes. 💎💎💎
Yoke
Thank you!🙏🙏
This year, I learned to allow closed doors to close... that I need to establish and enforce better boundaries... to have better self control when i feel slighted... and to never put someone else and their needs before mine unless they're my kid
God teach me how to learn from my pain and move my life to a productive place 💪🙏
Don't Have People In Your Life That Keeps Revisiting That Negative, Hurtful Point In Your Past. That You Have Emotionally and Phychologically Have Moved On From; Move Away From Them! 💎💎💎
82 minutes before it starts, started by liking the video already.
GUYS, PLEASE LIKE THE VIDEO AS WELL.
I’ve bern hurt so much and now I m so angry I’m
Seeking a therapist now cause it’s affecting my family. Just back to back hurt I just can’t take it anymore
🙏
⛓release it. I’m working on this myself.
Love this message .Thankyou
I’m on the greatest adventure of my life so far at 45 years I’m finally in a safe relationship with Jesus Christ who has rescued me from the pain of Narcissism rooted in my childhood and bought me safely through Narcissism relationships. Your videos are literally life saving .
I’ve learned that the people that hurt me never knew they were hurting me. I allowed myself t to happen to me by allowing these people in my life knowing they were emotionally available and broken. I’m giving up on lice abs relationships cause clearly I’m not good at vetting or choosing the right people , all are the same I but in Different bodies 🤔. I’m so glad for this video.
They were emotionally unavailable not available
Why do you keep getting stuck with the same type of guy to fix you must find what you need to work on yourself. For many women with this problem it can be self worth many of us have trauma and don't feel good enough for a quality person sometimes its years of abuse and your draw to them cause the energy is familiar but when a good guy is present you may be uncomfortable cause your not use to Only you can dig deep to find out why you are stuck in a pattern but once you do find the cause you can work to fix. Is it your style that attracts the wrong people thats another one we can fall into. Study people in the type of relationship you want what are all those women doing in common and then look at what you don't want and find what those ladies have in common that keep getting trash
Right now I’m going through some pain that I wouldn’t wish on my best friend. My chest hurts , my body hurts, I’m sick this the stomach that someone I lived with every thing I have has abandoned the ship with no remorse. I don’t know if I will ever get past this pain .”
Thank you Pastor Blakes! I experienced a deep church hurt. I have been struggling with joining a new ministry. I prayed for God to help me heal from the abuse I experienced. I came home this evening and you are teaching about learning from our pain. Our God is faithful!
Thank you for your ministry. My daughter married a malignant narc and the pain and the twisting of our mother-daughter relationship has torn me in pieces. I am not a victim I agree because God has a new thing for me. Pray for me to move on from this.
i believe one of the reasons i was caught up in one relationship after another was because if you are with a person who doesnt treat you right for x amount of time without realizing it you were lonley unfulfilled possibly abused so when you get out the last thing you want is to be is LONLEY ALONE you had just spent that time lonley with someone this is a danger zone for some of us and if we can wait til that transition phase of going from in a relationship to being alone it gives our emotions time to settle i just got burned out trying to prop and prep and coddle and coo a relationship trying to make it work. Good friends and being a good friend to yourself and your personal relationship with God is a breath of peace and joy
This is so true
I'm not going through this for nothing, I am learning something. 💎💎💎
Am becoming better instead of bitter though unlearning, relearning growing through everything Because I refuse to stay stuck on things I cannot undo .💜
My recent most heartbreaking pain. I’ve learnt to value myself more, put up stricter boundaries and never put myself in compromising situations ever again. I hope I can always remember how difficult this last year has been and never repeat it again.
💯💯💯
Thank you so much for these. I helped someone I was interested in a Bum as you would say. He didn't consistently work, allowed me to take care of him. He left me with 2 children after 12 years of Marriage with no car and nothing. Hurt because of the audacity is enormous. Thank you for posting this. Each video I see of yours I listen too and its given me strength to get through the healthy way. I appreciate you so much!!!
Hang in there the best is to come to you. He blessed you with two beautiful children. That was all he really had to offer you.
Yes, so precious to remember, to “grow through whatever we go through”. So much better than getting stuck in the pain and victim-hood, the powerlessness… Deep thanks dear Bishop Blakes, Blessings…
And “always find a reason to be Hopeful” and make music with what you have…
Hallelujah! Blessings to all…
I'm watching this teaching currently from my hospital bed recovering from surgery. This is definitely encouraging me. Thank you bishop
This talk made a difference in my life. I love Pastor RC Blake’s Ministry. Thank you! 🥰🌹
Turning bitterness into compassion…how powerful, and how deep. For Christ is Compassion. Having put on a Christlike mind, to sound judge the hurt individual (brethren), who themselves are seeking help and healing. (For healing is the main thing…) one needs the help of a compassionate dear sister or brother in the True Body of Christ; to understand, to forgive, to heal, and to love. Releasing all toxicity, from past hurts, pains, and traumas. Starting anew, with a Christlike mind, Christlike Compassion, and Christlike love. Seeing others as Christ sees them, and rightfully discerning through the spirit of Truth. Great message.
Dearest Regards,
Catrina
OMG!!! I love what you said “Don’t marry your history, that you can’t get a date with destiny.” That spoke volumes to me!! Thank God for you and your channel. I have learned so much from you about lessons in life! May God continue to bless you abundantly 🙏🏽✝️
So true…made that mistake and i will be paying for that 18+ years I have a child with that Narc…wow help Jesus!!! Thanks to Abba he got me out of that unequally yoked marriage and that 25 year soul tie is renounced and broken…that door is closed…he told the judge he didn’t want to visit with our child so hey…but she(our child) will be loved and won’t miss a beat…
RC I'm 62 and have been healing from Narcissist abuse since 2019. Really every single relationship I have had in my life has been abusive. I'm joyful to tell you that I have been transformed. I have peace, real peace. My God, my God! Thank you Sir, I will continue to watch you and I will keep on growing up and healing up. It's so nice to know who I am and to know the answers to all the why's. 🦅🎯
Thank you lord for being here with me through these tough times , and thank you to you for finding your way to me so your words can help me find my strength again . thank you for your videos and heart . Thank you .. thank you I don’t feel so alone anymore.
I am growing through hurt and Patiently learning more about me and how to pause,Breathe, Meditate,Being Still and Praying more with Assurance that God has a hand in the situation.Therr is a BEAUTY on a Rose however it has thorns!
Release The People That Are Toxic. 💎💎💎
Thankyou for this video I've been trying to work things out with my girl's father. But same ol same ol The incident we had last week I was yelling and how tired I was with this mess again and he yelled "leave" . I said ok God I hear you it's time to close this love less relationship door.
Your "bitter face" look has me cracking up! LOL! I've seen this look on the faces of so many women and they don't even realize how they are coming across.
Thank you RC, I so needed to hear this tonight. I am listening to you through my healing journey. You are helping me to travel this journey.
People with brain injuries don't respect boundaries...and they are a nightmare to attempt to leave. They will bankrupt you.
I feel the same about my father who was a pastor!! I have absolutely nothing bad to say about my father, he gave me a great life!! I miss him to infinity....
Vengeance is in GOD’S hands ONLY. I’m just going to sit back and chill.
Unproductive ReActions; such as anger, bitterness, unforgiveness, retaliation, etc. The root of these feelings are Evil. 💎💎💎
You are truly gifted. No one has ever had more impact in my life than you. Anytime I’m looking for how to get through something I go through your channel!!!!
This was the perfect message to end the night of a challenging birthday, that ended up being very beautiful! Thank You❤
Many kisses were blown up, and burst onto the sky. So make your wishes upon the stars. For every arrow that pierces the heart....thy cup will overflow.
"The only thing to change for your life to be improved is you" ❤
You Bless my life so much, I'm so grateful for you. And you always include scripture which I can further study and meditate with. Your voice is so comforting. I've learned so much. THANK YOU.
I am learning, healing, and growing,
Take the lessons from the pain and turn it into purpose!
This is so good! Toxic people, yes had to drop, on to positive things! From victim to victory yes!! I keep hearing God is doing a new thing, thank You God! God bless you Pastor, pain is truly a teacher! 🙌🏾
Thank you for sharing your hurt Nilka. It is great to know that the hurt goes away and forgiveness is possible. I'm having difficulty forgiving my husbands infidelity. I thought this man I married would never hurt me, not my best friend, the man God told me was the one for me. But when a woman sent me a letter telling me she was having an affair with my husband. I changed and not for the better. I have periods when I'm forgiving and then there's times when I am angry, distrustful, bitter and even periods of rage. I know these aren't the attributes of a Christian woman but I admit I do go there from time to time. I am constantly asking God for grace to forgive. I think my husband should give me reasons to forgive and trust again. Hiding his phone from me is not helping.
Dont ignore the 🚩.. be self aware. On to my healing process. The hurt is real but I must go through it!! And learn the lesson so it will NOT repeat itself🙏🏾 here 3 years later after video. But it was right on time. Thank you Pastor ❤❤♥️
The hurt taught me to be ok with myself, don’t be lazy to building myself up, I will only find a good healthy strong man when I am at that same state. You don’t get into those toxic relationships for no reason, most likely the real problem we need to start to fix is ourselves.
Can you do a video about online Dating and avoid getting hurt with creeps on there? In large cities people meet mainly on these apps and there are so many nasty rude superficial men.
When my girlfriend broke up with me a couple weeks ago I didn't understand why, I did nothing wrong. After some time I realized that it was my own insecurities and my fear of being alone that drove her away. I learned that I had to be comfortable myself before being comfortable with someone, and only to want, never need a special someone in your life.
Teach people how to treat me! Healthy Relationships are Positive and Rewarding!
I do throw people away I take the hurt ask God to forgive them. Have I learned something from the pain...Yes and I keep it moving I tell people thank you for the experience now exit my life. 🙌❤💅😄 God bless wonderful video!
Choose your pain is such an excellent way of wording what we go through. A wise friend of mine told me those who feel it know it
To be educated enough on what happened to never let it happen again. To learn how I processed it all, to use the steps to heal with Gods help from anything else that may arise. That is what I am Learning. To make better choices, to not fall victim to my own un educated knowledge of what if's. Thank you.
This is one of best messages on processing hurt that I’ve every heard! It’s makes so much sense! Thank you Pastor for sharing these words of wisdom 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Pain is a teacher. Yes Sir good word. God bless you.
I have been hurt many times... Men, family, friends, workmen's etc it's takes time to heal but above all I keep on going step by step each day. Prayers and for giving thou it takes time to for get.
This is a dailey struggle. Has transformed me into this person I never imagined. Having expectations us dangerous. And its robbed me if much happiness. And it's something I continue to do. And its made me cut most of the world out. And as soon as I let a few people in, they remind me why I did it in the first place.
Rip to your dad God bless who you are today
I've never wanted to get back I just wanted a normal life being a responsible parent.. I'm blown away at how trifling these men are .. I pray my son don't end up crazy no sense of direction .. just a normal life
people do stuff all the time I'm getting stronger and I've came to the conclusion we will go thru things until jesus comes back .. we live in a broken world
Thank you so much. This has taught me my purpose of the hurt I've been carrying for 10 years.
I love you R.C Blakes! May God Himself bless your heart, always! 🙂🤍💫
You know it’s good when it’s already 83 likes and it hasn’t even started yet
I dont know how to deal with this pain, I'm so hurt. Please Lord help me, you already know my internal struggles, now my heart is broken.....its soooooo much
Know thyself and learn from your mistakes! Keep moving forward and don’t look back!
I so needed to hear this! I must choose my pain and I know God will see me through. Thank you 😭😭🙏
I'm on top and I am going higher. God really has more in store for me. 💎💎💎
Pain is a teacher, and we learn from our pain 💔 but I'm learning from this pain🙏🙌 it is a lesson ❣️
God bless you always please keep me in your prayer I’m a single mom twice in my life I am now a widow for 11 years, thank you for a good lesson very well done love you and Lisa ❤️👍🏽🙏🏾
It has made me stronger, i use to couldn't live alone. I can now happily
God im willing to go tru this pain im going tru nd teach me what i need to learn 🙏
"Pain is a teacher" - Bishop RC Blakes
The night before Thanksgiving and I was discarded from the Narc😢😢😞. It does hurt when you open your heart for it to be crushed 💔💔. It's 11:42pm EST, Norfolk, VA. I've been crying on and off for a couple of hours now 🥺🥺🥺
What did I learn from pain? I learnt that if I didn't trust, I wouldn't hurt. So, my lesson is never trust anyone. Or, better, be attuned to red flags and never trust someone who shows red flags in their behavior.
Yes pastor am growing beyond been Affected no longer fallen for what deceive me in my past . Am so much better .
I'm in my pivitol year to do just this.... thank you so much. I'm working on it and glad to have many resources to do so. God's truth and people like you
Oh my Goodness, Gracias, Gracias, Gracias…. Your message comes to me at the perfect timing… I’m going through a divorce and God used your being to deliver such a beautiful teaching to me. Thank you! May God bless you and you family.
Thank you for this video. God has worked on me thru the years to forgive all those who hurt me and I learned a lot about me. Glad he moved a few men away from me.
A guy I was with years ago hurt me so bad u know last week he called me and said he made a mistake and it took him14 years to see that after me he had no good relationships no Matter what I'm not gonna go back there no even if u pay me😃😃😃🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
I appreciate being introduced to listen to you. I've heard so much from you that has been spot on the way I think, feel and learned to respond to situations and people. Your words have provided REMINDERS and validation that being imperfect is not about being perfect, but working through the imperfections towards God's purpose for ME!
I've learned and discerned in my hurt, that "YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH SOME THINGS TO GROW THROUGH SOME THINGS". I've met persons who could not accept that because they weren't ready to Grow. I also had to accept that I wasn't their messenger.
I also learned to use my hurt, pain, loss and grief as tools of encouragement to others not to give up or give in and that You can do anything through Him who strengthens you!
Your message could not have been more timely
Forgiveness Is The Greatest Therapy For Emotional Pain. 💎💎💎
I’m so used to pain that I’ve become immune to it , it’s like I’m used to it but yet I’m a child of God & I go to church every Sunday ..but I’m never happy . I’m good at pretending to be happy but nobody really knows my pain
So good … “pain is a teacher”
Older and wiser - what a wasted dream. I just exist - no joy , no friends , no family. Only God knows why I'm here - tired of being strong.
I like the music that I hear in the conversations it helps my soul say thank you from my❤️
Thanking God for your life and ministry. I never thought anyone could hurt me emotionally, because l have been too trusting on people that l truly love....l have learnt my lesson by keeping boundaries now...
I am sorry for the loss of your Father🥲💔❤️🩹🙏May he RIP! Always & forever🌹
I hear you Pastor. I have people in my life that I didn't ask to be their. They have an agenda which is to watch me have toxic angry outbursts so they can have a reason to say I am an emotional and unstable black woman. Most of them are chemical induced . I am not a substance user at all but the things I have to endure makes me so der if God is truly in them. My anger is regarding their presence. Men...black men..men of all races....they even have women or anybody they can get involved in the things they do to me. I heard the Spirit say they are obsessed with me. I believe it. I believe it wholeheartedly.
Hurt people hurt people