You're not a boring person, Kenneth. You're honest, articulate and entertaining. I recognise myself in you so much it's scary. Most of my friends would too. Most people I socialise with are creative and insecure in one way or another.
Please guys ..who ever is reading this ..never say u hate yourself..never say that your a loser.we have to love ourself. So somebody else ca love us. Please dont forget that..god bless you all...
I struggle with self hatred on a daily basis. It's definitely challenging, I don't have a girlfriend. I have friends, but it's hard for me to keep in contact with them, and it's really hard when everyone is able to go out on the weekends and have fun where I'm continuously in despair over being depressed, having OCD, having social anxiety, hating myself. I tend to blame myself for why I feel the way I do. I think if only I could be that person its so easy for them. I cry a lot on the inside. There's this dark void within in me that weighs 10 times what i do.
I like you because you are bringing up the less positive aspects that people usually don’t want to talk about on youtube (and irl), you talk about your experience/feelings and by you doing that.. it feels like you are giving an accepting vibe for people that it is okay to feel the way we feel. You are really strong for sharing your videos for us, I appreciate it a lot. Thank you 🙏🏽
I screwed up something in my life and your video gives me comfort. Everything you said I resonated with and I just feel less alone. I always come back to these videos. Thank you.
Hi. I'm maybe just a teenager but i've seen some of your videos and i actually started crying at one point because sometimes i can relate to this. I do have some friends to hang out with, but i don't really have someone i can talk to when i feel sad or lonely. And i hated myself too, for a very long time(it still happens sometimes). The things that helped for me was meeting new people who have the same hobbies as me (like going to geek's events and stuff). Another thing that can help to is to just start doing *something* new for yourself(like workout, eat healthier, trying new things, do the things that you like to do , maby travel or learn something new). It's hard to do that, but you can just do a little step every day..and allow yourself to take a rest and do nothing all day. It's okay. I don't know..that's not what's going to solve all of your problems, but it's helped me a little. Anyway, you seem like a nice person..i really wish that you would get better. Thank you for making this video! (Btw i'm not a native speaker so i may have some mistakes, sorry about that)
I have heart disease... I know you have the best intentions but I am sick and tired of this advice... Lifting some stupid weights won't solve anything...
Self pity is a waste of your life I spent all the way though my mid 30's doing that I turned 30 years old in 1999. I lived alone throughout my 20's I had friends but always felt I was less then I hardly ever dated any girls a few relationships I had were not good I settled for broken people. What I realized was by my mid 30's was I just stopped caring what anyone thought could not get back on track until my 40's far too late now to have a family I'm almost 50 next year. I'm on my 2nd marriage with a long time abusive alcoholic who never wanted kids we met in my late 30's. Probably good thing I would never ever want to bring a kid into my world plus she would just drink while she was pregnant she never wanted that she got herself sterilized in her 20's. Now I look around see so many younger people with normal lives beautiful wives at home 3 kids nice homes. I would have made a good father If I met the right person didn't waste my life with self pity. I sometimes look at woman who are in their 20-30's forget for a second my graying hair looking out my eyes I'm still 20 something. They look back at me like I'm a gross old man checking them out probably thinking I'm the same age as their father. You don't realize how much you lost until it's gone your youth 20-40 that short 20 year span is when your entire life is set after that everything changes. Your health will start to go on you as soon as you turn 40s, employers age discrimination starts also I look around I'm the oldest in my group. My employer is always looking to cut I no longer work 60 hour weeks employers notice that younger people work harder. My advice is find a way to break though the self pity and get a life you want going because time passes so fast you won't even remember how fast it came. This post even sounds like self pity but that's what happened only you can fix life for you.
No one should feel this way, we were never born this way.As a child, I was bullied by an older sibling and also at school. I was told I was rubbished and ugly. I was brainwashed, and still think I'm ugly today although I have been told otherwise. it developed in to a condition, where I became addicted to looking in the mirror all day long checking my appearance, I had no control.I spent 4 long years in my bedroom, I couldn't face anyone. But slowly I overcame it with the right medication and insight.I used to be too focused on what others think, but now I realise that it's not that important as how I think about myself.Far from perfect, but a good, kind a=nd caring person. You have more strengths than you realize, the proof is in these videos.I found helping others who were struggling, helped me to understand myself. and Very importantly.I now know I'm not alone. Everyone has insecurities, but don't blame yourself. We get into a vicious circle of thought as you say, it's all about thoughts, thoughts affect our feelings.. First, we need to be aware of the dialogue in our heads and change it. Something that helped me was, Every time I have a negative thought, I say to myself, 'It's just a thought'.that's all it is, it isn't reality. in time your mind accepts it for what it is, and the thoughts lose their power, try it. No one else is saying the things you feel but yourself. I could never have the confidence to put a video on here of myself. that doesn't make me a failiure, or hate myself, it's just not one of my strenghs but it is yours.I felt like you once.I took small steps to proving myself wrong. Now I have six books on Amazon, been in over 50 books and magazines, bookstores worldwide. That is my strength, keep finding yours. good luck.
A pleasure friend. You're a great guy but., I know you won't believe it. have you ever used affirmations, repeating a phrase over and over in your mind silently?.ie, ''; Self-love'' throughout the day over and over again until it becomes ingrained, worked for me. takes time, Say it with feeling. you have the power to change your life like anyone else. You need to break the cycle of same old thoughts and replace them with new ones. We have programmed ourselves for failure.we can programme ourselves for success. the problem is, we are so used to our self-programming, it may seem a bit frightening at first, we fear change. break the cycle.
I have this too since I was a small child. I believe it stems from my childhood abuse and my mother ridiculing me for as much as breathing. I couldn't do anything right.
I've always felt the same I think that because I feel other people dislike me I've always felt that I'm wrong and idiot a fool and hate myself for it it's a vicious cycle because the negative thoughts cause me to be unable to deal with relationships with friends family and girlfriends and it overspills in school college and work my negative thoughts cause everything to go wrong which has caused me to have a breakdown last year and I'm struggling to cope now you're right and not alone with this
I find it really refreshing to hear someone talk about their negative thoughts and feelings. The internet is so awash with fake happiness and fake success and fake popularity, of people trying to prove they are something that they aren't. I like how genuine and vulnerable you are and I would definitely be your friend because you are not fake, arrogant shallow like most people.
I'm afraid to put myself out there because I'm afraid people won't like me. The funny part is that by not putting yourself out there, you get exactly what you don't want.
Personally and Honestly, I have trouble finding fault with you Ken.. I know how consuming other peoples words can be, and how, even after you have forgot what the words are, how the negative emotion has manifested into your self image.. I realise that you might not appreciate my next words but they help me.. Google the words of Jesus, especially to do with self image and how special you really are.. These scriptures are Absolute and without doubt the truest opinion of who you really are...All other opinions about you have no significance, only these words from Him.. Please be open minded, You can use his words to replace your moments you slip into self negative thoughts.. I THINK YOU'RE AN AWESOME GUY.. CHEER UP AND JUST TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR SUBS LIST.. People Love you Ken.. :-)
Hey dude I hate myself, too. Mommy thinks that I don't do anything in my room, but I do. I type stories called The Oh Snap Convention series. It's about me, my little brother Joseph, and this actor named Dev Patel, going on some fun exciting adventures.
I get sporadic waves of self-hatred, but I also have periods where I'm very pleased with myself. Since my childhood, all through my life, I've had a looks obsession. Sometimes I thought I looked very good and of course when I did, this put me in a very good mood. Other times, seeing myself in the mirror, at certain angles, in certain lights, this self-satisfaction would be demolished. I went back and forth, back and forth. Beginning in my early 40's, I started losing whatever good looks I may have had. My past has been littered with some pretty cringey photos, but they started increasing about that time. Although I fluctuate even now between thinking I look pretty young and good and thinking I've lost it all and have finally become an old man, losing my looks is a constant source of anxiety for me. Is this vain? How can I deny it? Is it shallow? Same answer. But I think there are nuances to it as well. I'm just giving you my honest feelings. Not justifying or defending them. I don't accept the usual pep talks or platitudes myself. The answers I think aren't the usual obvious ones, I'm sure. I explore them in my own way. While my looks obsession is a big part of what ails me, it's just one facet, one aspect of many, too numerous to go into here. I don't see any easy answers. I refuse to blame society. I must take the full responsibility myself.
Ageing gracefully is a difficult thing, and i'm sure you're doing the best you can. I know it's really another platitude, but know that many people go through similar anxieties about losing things they hold dear, and our looks are part of our identity, so in my view it's not shallow to feel a sense of loss when we age. Best wishes to you Jethro Bodine.
Wow. Wow. These could have been my words. I’m a 36 year old woman. The looks fixation, the lighting, the angles, that’s me to a “T”. My entire day can be utterly ruined if I see a picture of myself where I feel like I look horrible. I wonder how I dare let myself be seeing like that and why didn’t anyone ever tell me. I can never just comfortably exist, not even in my own home among my kids. I feel on display constantly. Do I look ugly walking. Do I look sloppy the way I’m sitting. I think a lot of it traces back to me growing up where the only compliment I was ever given from my parents, especially my dad, was that I was beautiful. That was IT. And then once I reached dating age I had a lot of men tell me I wasn’t “that hot” or “you’d be a 10 if...”. I had a lot of other men take advantage of me for my looks. I could never figure out if I was beautiful or not. And I always wondered why that was such a focus to everyone that interacted with me. After a while I realized that that seemed to be what mattered. No one seemed to be interested in other aspects of my personage. To this day, even though I’m married to a wonderful man, I can’t look at myself in the mirror unless I’m mentally prepared for it and it’s a mirror that I’m used to. I can’t look at myself with certain lights on. I won’t even glance at myself with full bathroom lights on. I won’t. Sometimes I have a mini panic attack realizing that I’m actually hideous and why didn’t anyone tell me and how have I tricked my husband this long. I start wondering if hes going to discover any day that I’m actually repulsive. He tells me I’m beautiful, I feel like he’s just trying to be nice. My own husband has never seen me completely without make up in seven years of marriage. Wow, saying this all out loud makes me realize how legitimate my issues are. Having just lived with it all so long it’s become normal. Other times I get a self inflated sense of attractiveness. To be perfectly frank I really start to panic about getting older because I think I won’t matter at all to anyone in a few years time because I’ll have no looks left. I’m horribly hard on myself. I have no real friends. I hide it all well. I’ve never come across anyone else who seems to have a similar issue as myself
Okay f it i gotta change!!!!!!! Reading all this is just depressing. Im 23 but i feel like this is what my life could look like and hell no. Tq for the stories tho
Is not necessarily to be fanny or attractive to live good life . you just accepted yourself and don't think too much or be aware how people feel . I know how is so hard to be alone had bless you . soo much love
Spot on video Kenny! I have always struggled with that since I was a kid! I am working, and getting better, at thinking I am good enough! When I get in a group of teachers now I just remind myself "there is nothing wrong with me I am a good person- they aren't really any better than I am! but it is a struggle! Hang in there Kenny!
Hey, you changed your username! And you are totally right! It's always good to remind yourself that there is nothing wrong with you. It is a struggle but we are all getting through it! Thanks for the comment!
Funny part is I don't know how I changed my username--I have such problems sometimes with technology!!!! So you may see it go back and forth--don't be surprised!!! LOL
The same thing happens to me. One of the things that brings me down is in conversation in groups of people, it always seems like I’m always getting cut off and ignored like what I have to say doesn’t matter. When this constantly happens, you start believing nothing you have to say matters, and in turn that you don’t matter. When interacting with others, you are less inclined to speak up.
Thankyou so much for the video.. Its helped me tonight .. I suffer from social anxiety self hatred depression ect.. That video lifted my mood and made me snap out of the negative self talk mode.. Cheers mate hope you know your not alone.... 😊
I think self hatred is beacuse of the sociaety. I say this cause when im alone. Im happy with myself. But when i rembember the bullies soo...i start to compare myself with other and my self image lows down.
Thanks for sharing kenny, keep it up man! I don't know you but I'm proud of you for starting this channel, maintaining it, and actually being honest with who and where you are as a person at that moment in time. For some people this would be easy but for other people, that have these issues that you talk about, like me and you, making a video like this is equivalent to climbing Mt. Everest...so congratulations man and fuck any negative comments some ppl may post, only take in the positives bc thats all that matters. Thanks for helping me on a daily basis...respect bro!
The best think to do is free yourself of false guilt. Self- hatred is simply being a prisoner of your own mind and making yourself out to be tour own worst enemy. You have to learn to cast out your demons and stop perceiving yourself as inferior just because of your circumstances.
I hate who I am.. my mother told me from the beginning I'm worthless, stupid and good for nothing.. some days I have good days but then my "friends" do things and not invite me so that just makes me go bk to my post mentality.
Kenneth another thing I wanted to say to you is, usually when people have like what okay you're a guy cell I'm a girl so I'll say it from a girl's point of view, usually when a girl has a guy, a boyfriend, she's not so wrapped up on oh I wish I had some friends, like you talk way more about having friends, then you do about your girlfriend, and that just makes me feel like what's wrong? Because I haven't seen her on UA-cam one time, and then I would think that whenever you're lonely you could just call her up, and talk to her and then everything would be cool. But it seems like everything is hardly ever cool with you, so that it may be that you don't really talk to her that much. But like one of your videos you I probably shouldn't say this but because you might feed into it hopefully it won't. But like one of the videos that I saw you looked so adorable I mean if I would have been your girlfriend and I seen you in that condition I would have been calling you up and I would have been saying it ready cuz I'm coming over we're going to have dinner we're going to watch a movie we're going to cuddle up and you're not going to be lonely, and I just want like what that's not happening whenever you're lonely because one time you said you were so lonely, and you called up your girlfriend and she said she was busy playing some game with somebody card game or whatever kind of game she was playing. And I just thought that was so strange. And in another video I saw you I thought I would just love to Mother you because you're and I hope nobody makes fun of this but you just look like a boy who needed to be mothered. so but I think the problem is is that you're talking too much, about things that bother you, and that just leaves more room for them to bother you! It gives them more opportunity to bother you because you're talking about them because it's what you think about, if it bothers you you really shouldn't be thinking about it so much think of things that you like not things that bother you. That makes sense to me, because I wouldn't want to give the time and energy two things that trouble me. I would rather go find something to do that I like doing, and that makes me happy, and that doesn't bother me. That way I can have a good night sleep too
I will tell u wat is ur problem. "U experienced that becoz ur hanging with fake people." Y don't u try to be simple and deal with simple ideas. It won't harsh ur feelings anymore. In this way u will find real frendz
So I just found your channel today and I love it, it’s amazing and it really helps me especially this video because I have a lot of self hatred and it’s a long story but I don’t wanna put all my business out here like that so please email me @shekinahcross
Im so depressed, my self esteem is so low idk even i have one, my first thought after waking up is u are a pathetic loser. Sometimes im reapiting this to myself for a long period of time. I have no friends, i dont hangout with anybody, im boring, i have no motivation, ambitions, my social skills are close to none, i just alienated myself from everybody. I've tried to hang myself once, but i was afraid of pain that come with it, just didnt knew how to do it right. I came up with idea of list my posivites and negatives i found about a lot of negatives and no even one positive feature. Should i go to a specialist? Im slowly dying inside im still young 23yo, but if i will be like that at 30 i will end this, i dont see the point of living like that. Im short, ugly, stupid, not interesting, i can forget about relationship with women just not good enough and i dont want to burden somebody with me.
I feel the same way a lot of the time. If you have not already, it is worth getting help in psychiatry. Therapy, maybe medication. What helped me a lot is having tests done to better understand what the problem is. Those depressing thoughts may mean more than depression, as was the case for me. Don't believe everything you think.
Being funny is not the only thing to make friends. Believe it or not I have a good sense of humor and I can make peoples laugh. But still somewhere peoples actually hate me ☺You have to change yourself completely for making friends according to their expectations otherwise you are not promoted to make friends. So stop seeking for attention. Whatever you are you are the best. You don't need to change. Focus on self growth 🦚
I feel alone.
I hate myself.
This has not changed. But I still wish for it.
As I Understand it Charlie right
@Ahmad Mateen what do you mean?
You're making a real difference to people Kenny 🌹
You're not a boring person, Kenneth. You're honest, articulate and entertaining. I recognise myself in you so much it's scary. Most of my friends would too. Most people I socialise with are creative and insecure in one way or another.
Please guys ..who ever is reading this ..never say u hate yourself..never say that your a loser.we have to love ourself. So somebody else ca love us. Please dont forget that..god bless you all...
zonny hernandez one year later this comment was meant for me. Thank you I love you and god bless you as well! I got to keep going
I struggle with self hatred on a daily basis. It's definitely challenging, I don't have a girlfriend. I have friends, but it's hard for me to keep in contact with them, and it's really hard when everyone is able to go out on the weekends and have fun where I'm continuously in despair over being depressed, having OCD, having social anxiety, hating myself. I tend to blame myself for why I feel the way I do. I think if only I could be that person its so easy for them. I cry a lot on the inside. There's this dark void within in me that weighs 10 times what i do.
I like you because you are bringing up the less positive aspects that people usually don’t want to talk about on youtube (and irl), you talk about your experience/feelings and by you doing that.. it feels like you are giving an accepting vibe for people that it is okay to feel the way we feel. You are really strong for sharing your videos for us, I appreciate it a lot. Thank you 🙏🏽
I screwed up something in my life and your video gives me comfort. Everything you said I resonated with and I just feel less alone. I always come back to these videos. Thank you.
Hi. I'm maybe just a teenager but i've seen some of your videos and i actually started crying at one point because sometimes i can relate to this. I do have some friends to hang out with, but i don't really have someone i can talk to when i feel sad or lonely. And i hated myself too, for a very long time(it still happens sometimes). The things that helped for me was meeting new people who have the same hobbies as me (like going to geek's events and stuff). Another thing that can help to is to just start doing *something* new for yourself(like workout, eat healthier, trying new things, do the things that you like to do , maby travel or learn something new). It's hard to do that, but you can just do a little step every day..and allow yourself to take a rest and do nothing all day. It's okay. I don't know..that's not what's going to solve all of your problems, but it's helped me a little. Anyway, you seem like a nice person..i really wish that you would get better. Thank you for making this video! (Btw i'm not a native speaker so i may have some mistakes, sorry about that)
These are some great thoughts! Thanks for sharing :) I hope things go well for you!
Fitness and good diet will turn things around. You just have to make the changes and commit to them
I agree. However, there is no gym for your face.
I have heart disease... I know you have the best intentions but I am sick and tired of this advice... Lifting some stupid weights won't solve anything...
I love honesty
I do hope that in the two years since you posted this video you have come to a better place. Much love, v
Self pity is a waste of your life I spent all the way though my mid 30's doing that I turned 30 years old in 1999. I lived alone throughout my 20's I had friends but always felt I was less then I hardly ever dated any girls a few relationships I had were not good I settled for broken people. What I realized was by my mid 30's was I just stopped caring what anyone thought could not get back on track until my 40's far too late now to have a family I'm almost 50 next year. I'm on my 2nd marriage with a long time abusive alcoholic who never wanted kids we met in my late 30's. Probably good thing I would never ever want to bring a kid into my world plus she would just drink while she was pregnant she never wanted that she got herself sterilized in her 20's. Now I look around see so many younger people with normal lives beautiful wives at home 3 kids nice homes. I would have made a good father If I met the right person didn't waste my life with self pity. I sometimes look at woman who are in their 20-30's forget for a second my graying hair looking out my eyes I'm still 20 something. They look back at me like I'm a gross old man checking them out probably thinking I'm the same age as their father. You don't realize how much you lost until it's gone your youth 20-40 that short 20 year span is when your entire life is set after that everything changes. Your health will start to go on you as soon as you turn 40s, employers age discrimination starts also I look around I'm the oldest in my group. My employer is always looking to cut I no longer work 60 hour weeks employers notice that younger people work harder. My advice is find a way to break though the self pity and get a life you want going because time passes so fast you won't even remember how fast it came. This post even sounds like self pity but that's what happened only you can fix life for you.
I can relate. I'm now over 40. When I see young couples it just eats away at me now knowing that I never had that.
Believing in yourself is key, Kenny :)
Thanks for sharing this! :))
I relate even though I wish I didn’t. Lonelyness is a horrible way to feel.
No one should feel this way, we were never born this way.As a child, I was bullied by an older sibling and also at school. I was told I was rubbished and ugly. I was brainwashed, and still think I'm ugly today although I have been told otherwise. it developed in to a condition, where I became addicted to looking in the mirror all day long checking my appearance, I had no control.I spent 4 long years in my bedroom, I couldn't face anyone. But slowly I overcame it with the right medication and insight.I used to be too focused on what others think, but now I realise that it's not that important as how I think about myself.Far from perfect, but a good, kind a=nd caring person. You have more strengths than you realize, the proof is in these videos.I found helping others who were struggling, helped me to understand myself. and Very importantly.I now know I'm not alone. Everyone has insecurities, but don't blame yourself. We get into a vicious circle of thought as you say, it's all about thoughts, thoughts affect our feelings.. First, we need to be aware of the dialogue in our heads and change it.
Something that helped me was, Every time I have a negative thought, I say to myself, 'It's just a thought'.that's all it is, it isn't reality. in time your mind accepts it for what it is, and the thoughts lose their power, try it. No one else is saying the things you feel but yourself. I could never have the confidence to put a video on here of myself. that doesn't make me a failiure, or hate myself, it's just not one of my strenghs but it is yours.I felt like you once.I took small steps to proving myself wrong. Now I have six books on Amazon, been in over 50 books and magazines, bookstores worldwide. That is my strength, keep finding yours. good luck.
thank you for youre insight gorgeous soul 😚
A pleasure friend. You're a great guy but., I know you won't believe it. have you ever used affirmations, repeating a phrase over and over in your mind silently?.ie, ''; Self-love'' throughout the day over and over again until it becomes ingrained, worked for me. takes time, Say it with feeling. you have the power to change your life like anyone else. You need to break the cycle of same old thoughts and replace them with new ones. We have programmed ourselves for failure.we can programme ourselves for success. the problem is, we are so used to our self-programming, it may seem a bit frightening at first, we fear change. break the cycle.
I have this too since I was a small child. I believe it stems from my childhood abuse and my mother ridiculing me for as much as breathing. I couldn't do anything right.
I've always felt the same I think that because I feel other people dislike me I've always felt that I'm wrong and idiot a fool and hate myself for it it's a vicious cycle because the negative thoughts cause me to be unable to deal with relationships with friends family and girlfriends and it overspills in school college and work my negative thoughts cause everything to go wrong which has caused me to have a breakdown last year and I'm struggling to cope now you're right and not alone with this
Look into orthomolecular diet that affects the brain.
@@stickerlady1774 thank you I'll have a look
Anytime. Hit me up if you have questions.
@@stickerlady1774 thank you
I find it really refreshing to hear someone talk about their negative thoughts and feelings. The internet is so awash with fake happiness and fake success and fake popularity, of people trying to prove they are something that they aren't. I like how genuine and vulnerable you are and I would definitely be your friend because you are not fake, arrogant shallow like most people.
I'm afraid to put myself out there because I'm afraid people won't like me. The funny part is that by not putting yourself out there, you get exactly what you don't want.
I watch this video bc I need it and I have a hard time about myself
Personally and Honestly, I have trouble finding fault with you Ken.. I know how consuming other peoples words can be, and how, even after you have forgot what the words are, how the negative emotion has manifested into your self image.. I realise that you might not appreciate my next words but they help me.. Google the words of Jesus, especially to do with self image and how special you really are.. These scriptures are Absolute and without doubt the truest opinion of who you really are...All other opinions about you have no significance, only these words from Him.. Please be open minded, You can use his words to replace your moments you slip into self negative thoughts.. I THINK YOU'RE AN AWESOME GUY.. CHEER UP AND JUST TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR SUBS LIST.. People Love you Ken.. :-)
Hey dude I hate myself, too. Mommy thinks that I don't do anything in my room, but I do. I type stories called The Oh Snap Convention series. It's about me, my little brother Joseph, and this actor named Dev Patel, going on some fun exciting adventures.
You’re extremely wise man
I get sporadic waves of self-hatred, but I also have periods where I'm very pleased with myself. Since my childhood, all through my life, I've had a looks obsession. Sometimes I thought I looked very good and of course when I did, this put me in a very good mood. Other times, seeing myself in the mirror, at certain angles, in certain lights, this self-satisfaction would be demolished. I went back and forth, back and forth. Beginning in my early 40's, I started losing whatever good looks I may have had. My past has been littered with some pretty cringey photos, but they started increasing about that time. Although I fluctuate even now between thinking I look pretty young and good and thinking I've lost it all and have finally become an old man, losing my looks is a constant source of anxiety for me. Is this vain? How can I deny it? Is it shallow? Same answer. But I think there are nuances to it as well.
I'm just giving you my honest feelings. Not justifying or defending them. I don't accept the usual pep talks or platitudes myself. The answers I think aren't the usual obvious ones, I'm sure. I explore them in my own way.
While my looks obsession is a big part of what ails me, it's just one facet, one aspect of many, too numerous to go into here. I don't see any easy answers. I refuse to blame society. I must take the full responsibility myself.
Ageing gracefully is a difficult thing, and i'm sure you're doing the best you can. I know it's really another platitude, but know that many people go through similar anxieties about losing things they hold dear, and our looks are part of our identity, so in my view it's not shallow to feel a sense of loss when we age. Best wishes to you Jethro Bodine.
Wow. Wow. These could have been my words. I’m a 36 year old woman. The looks fixation, the lighting, the angles, that’s me to a “T”. My entire day can be utterly ruined if I see a picture of myself where I feel like I look horrible. I wonder how I dare let myself be seeing like that and why didn’t anyone ever tell me. I can never just comfortably exist, not even in my own home among my kids. I feel on display constantly. Do I look ugly walking. Do I look sloppy the way I’m sitting.
I think a lot of it traces back to me growing up where the only compliment I was ever given from my parents, especially my dad, was that I was beautiful. That was IT. And then once I reached dating age I had a lot of men tell me I wasn’t “that hot” or “you’d be a 10 if...”.
I had a lot of other men take advantage of me for my looks. I could never figure out if I was beautiful or not. And I always wondered why that was such a focus to everyone that interacted with me. After a while I realized that that seemed to be what mattered. No one seemed to be interested in other aspects of my personage.
To this day, even though I’m married to a wonderful man, I can’t look at myself in the mirror unless I’m mentally prepared for it and it’s a mirror that I’m used to. I can’t look at myself with certain lights on. I won’t even glance at myself with full bathroom lights on. I won’t. Sometimes I have a mini panic attack realizing that I’m actually hideous and why didn’t anyone tell me and how have I tricked my husband this long. I start wondering if hes going to discover any day that I’m actually repulsive. He tells me I’m beautiful, I feel like he’s just trying to be nice.
My own husband has never seen me completely without make up in seven years of marriage. Wow, saying this all out loud makes me realize how legitimate my issues are. Having just lived with it all so long it’s become normal.
Other times I get a self inflated sense of attractiveness. To be perfectly frank I really start to panic about getting older because I think I won’t matter at all to anyone in a few years time because I’ll have no looks left. I’m horribly hard on myself. I have no real friends. I hide it all well.
I’ve never come across anyone else who seems to have a similar issue as myself
I feel your pain
Okay f it i gotta change!!!!!!! Reading all this is just depressing. Im 23 but i feel like this is what my life could look like and hell no. Tq for the stories tho
I can totally relate 100%
Is not necessarily to be fanny or attractive to live good life . you just accepted yourself and don't think too much or be aware how people feel . I know how is so hard to be alone had bless you . soo much love
He's white and would be quite desirable in the gay community.
I appreciate your logic, quite open minded, and I honestly sense power in you, wish you the best of luck, and to every body else who is struggling
Spot on video Kenny! I have always struggled with that since I was a kid! I am working, and getting better, at thinking I am good enough! When I get in a group of teachers now I just remind myself "there is nothing wrong with me I am a good person- they aren't really any better than I am! but it is a struggle! Hang in there Kenny!
Hey, you changed your username! And you are totally right! It's always good to remind yourself that there is nothing wrong with you. It is a struggle but we are all getting through it! Thanks for the comment!
Funny part is I don't know how I changed my username--I have such problems sometimes with technology!!!! So you may see it go back and forth--don't be surprised!!! LOL
The same thing happens to me. One of the things that brings me down is in conversation in groups of people, it always seems like I’m always getting cut off and ignored like what I have to say doesn’t matter. When this constantly happens, you start believing nothing you have to say matters, and in turn that you don’t matter. When interacting with others, you are less inclined to speak up.
Thankyou so much for the video.. Its helped me tonight .. I suffer from social anxiety self hatred depression ect.. That video lifted my mood and made me snap out of the negative self talk mode.. Cheers mate hope you know your not alone.... 😊
ty for sharing this video. i have been hating myself and have extreme anger the lass few days. u give me encouragement. glad i found ur channel
I think self hatred is beacuse of the sociaety. I say this cause when im alone. Im happy with myself. But when i rembember the bullies soo...i start to compare myself with other and my self image lows down.
what you are doing is big! Please keep as honest as you possibly can, Thank you ! Lots of love.
Thanks for sharing kenny, keep it up man! I don't know you but I'm proud of you for starting this channel, maintaining it, and actually being honest with who and where you are as a person at that moment in time. For some people this would be easy but for other people, that have these issues that you talk about, like me and you, making a video like this is equivalent to climbing Mt. Everest...so congratulations man and fuck any negative comments some ppl may post, only take in the positives bc thats all that matters. Thanks for helping me on a daily basis...respect bro!
The best think to do is free yourself of false guilt. Self- hatred is simply being a prisoner of your own mind and making yourself out to be tour own worst enemy. You have to learn to cast out your demons and stop perceiving yourself as inferior just because of your circumstances.
thats it guy - the more we use our intellects and thought process and our hearts and feelings the more insight to purity we will get.
Confidence is key
I hate who I am.. my mother told me from the beginning I'm worthless, stupid and good for nothing.. some days I have good days but then my "friends" do things and not invite me so that just makes me go bk to my post mentality.
I can relate to that 100.%
thanks this made me laugh
Just remember that your childhood you doesn't define the man you. Dont claim it.
Hi I’m introvert I’ve found your channel
I think im not worth a damn
Same situation I hate that too😖
Most ppl is boring. 99% is boring 1% ppl is interesting.
Kenneth another thing I wanted to say to you is, usually when people have like what okay you're a guy cell I'm a girl so I'll say it from a girl's point of view, usually when a girl has a guy, a boyfriend, she's not so wrapped up on oh I wish I had some friends, like you talk way more about having friends, then you do about your girlfriend, and that just makes me feel like what's wrong? Because I haven't seen her on UA-cam one time, and then I would think that whenever you're lonely you could just call her up, and talk to her and then everything would be cool. But it seems like everything is hardly ever cool with you, so that it may be that you don't really talk to her that much. But like one of your videos you I probably shouldn't say this but because you might feed into it hopefully it won't. But like one of the videos that I saw you looked so adorable I mean if I would have been your girlfriend and I seen you in that condition I would have been calling you up and I would have been saying it ready cuz I'm coming over we're going to have dinner we're going to watch a movie we're going to cuddle up and you're not going to be lonely, and I just want like what that's not happening whenever you're lonely because one time you said you were so lonely, and you called up your girlfriend and she said she was busy playing some game with somebody card game or whatever kind of game she was playing. And I just thought that was so strange. And in another video I saw you I thought I would just love to Mother you because you're and I hope nobody makes fun of this but you just look like a boy who needed to be mothered. so but I think the problem is is that you're talking too much, about things that bother you, and that just leaves more room for them to bother you! It gives them more opportunity to bother you because you're talking about them because it's what you think about, if it bothers you you really shouldn't be thinking about it so much think of things that you like not things that bother you. That makes sense to me, because I wouldn't want to give the time and energy two things that trouble me. I would rather go find something to do that I like doing, and that makes me happy, and that doesn't bother me. That way I can have a good night sleep too
我以为在西方国家，人们不会评判某些东西，像你是谁，你喜欢谁，但我错了，这只存在于我的理想之中。我相信，我们总不能看到某些东西，但我想去喜欢某些东西，热爱某些东西，我想要成为某些人，我自己想成为的人，而不仅仅是别人认为的人。是的， 我很痛苦，我抗击它，但我想尝试接触现实，接触理想，成为我自己。我是个中国人，但我觉得你可以去做，去成为你自己。
David Smith exactly what i was trying to say
I will tell u wat is ur problem. "U experienced that becoz ur hanging with fake people." Y don't u try to be simple and deal with simple ideas. It won't harsh ur feelings anymore. In this way u will find real frendz
So I just found your channel today and I love it, it’s amazing and it really helps me especially this video because I have a lot of self hatred and it’s a long story but I don’t wanna put all my business out here like that so please email me @shekinahcross
Self-esteem is seriously very highly over-rated ....
Im so depressed, my self esteem is so low idk even i have one, my first thought after waking up is u are a pathetic loser. Sometimes im reapiting this to myself for a long period of time. I have no friends, i dont hangout with anybody, im boring, i have no motivation, ambitions, my social skills are close to none, i just alienated myself from everybody. I've tried to hang myself once, but i was afraid of pain that come with it, just didnt knew how to do it right. I came up with idea of list my posivites and negatives i found about a lot of negatives and no even one positive feature. Should i go to a specialist? Im slowly dying inside im still young 23yo, but if i will be like that at 30 i will end this, i dont see the point of living like that. Im short, ugly, stupid, not interesting, i can forget about relationship with women just not good enough and i dont want to burden somebody with me.
I feel the same way a lot of the time. If you have not already, it is worth getting help in psychiatry. Therapy, maybe medication. What helped me a lot is having tests done to better understand what the problem is. Those depressing thoughts may mean more than depression, as was the case for me. Don't believe everything you think.
Tymek Kowalski well I have a huge forehead so I'm ugly to it sulks and it's not your fault and when your short and I am to
Well this video is proof of the fact that you've been abused.
Why do you say that?
Being funny is not the only thing to make friends. Believe it or not I have a good sense of humor and I can make peoples laugh. But still somewhere peoples actually hate me ☺You have to change yourself completely for making friends according to their expectations otherwise you are not promoted to make friends. So stop seeking for attention. Whatever you are you are the best. You don't need to change. Focus on self growth 🦚