Rageaholic Cinema: REVENGE OF THE NINJA

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 13 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 673

  • @davidmiller2437
    @davidmiller2437 7 років тому +168

    That "never give the Japanese the element of surprise" joke was fantastic.

    • @briefcaseblues6061
      @briefcaseblues6061 3 роки тому +10

      The "Ted Nugent's Worst Nightmare" joke was on point too🤣
      And like Ted!

  • @steveouk90126
    @steveouk90126 4 роки тому +140

    "More bodies than a Chinese cemetery"
    A joke in 2017; a reality in 2020.

  • @zetetick395
    @zetetick395 5 років тому +39

    *Revenge of the Ninja* (1983) is a truly kick-ass classic ninja movie, definitely one of the best!

  • @ekscalybur
    @ekscalybur 7 років тому +177

    As a child in the 80s, I think I watched every Cannon Films movie. I think I enjoyed them because of the cheese, not in spite of it.

    • @ferox965
      @ferox965 7 років тому +18

      Same here...video stores were a magical place. Cannon was a big part of my childhood.

    • @jimmyj5035
      @jimmyj5035 5 років тому +18

      Generation X... We were the Self Raised Lock Turn Key Kids... Cannon Films was like our Video Store Uncle telling us about Chuck Norris, Charles Bronson, Sho Kosugi, Jean-Claude Van Damme & Break Dancing LOL amongst Many other fun things... May the Memories of Cannon Live Forever!

    • @sugarnads
      @sugarnads 5 років тому +4

      Damned straight, me too.

    • @sugarnads
      @sugarnads 5 років тому +6

      And golan globus

    • @joemilo2710
      @joemilo2710 Рік тому +3

      It was definitely not cheese back then, it was just purely awesome to every Gen X and early Millennial!

  • @whenthemusicsover6028
    @whenthemusicsover6028 6 років тому +123

    "Tokyo, Japan."
    Just in case you confused it with Tokyo, New Jersey.

    • @Aethgeir
      @Aethgeir 3 роки тому +11

      Except that it shows the Golden Pavilion which is famously in Kyoto, not Tokyo.

    • @mylifeisacomplexpastiche7901
      @mylifeisacomplexpastiche7901 2 роки тому +4

      @@Aethgeir Same thing, just flip the letters around.

  • @Cagon415
    @Cagon415 4 роки тому +20

    When Sho dragged on the back of that van to the point where his legs were bleeding, 6 year old me was sold. Dude's a badass.

  • @NerfedFalcon
    @NerfedFalcon 7 років тому +61

    You showed me Dirty Harry, and I wasn't disappointed.
    Now you've shown me this. I'm instantly sold.

  • @rmeddy
    @rmeddy 7 років тому +17

    I remember seeing this as a kid on cinemax,and was blown away by. it, that part with him blowing the blades in the dudes face freaking blew my mind.

  • @TeryJones
    @TeryJones 7 років тому +72

    I have just been made aware of a movie where "Hey look! Superman" actually works. What a time to be alive XDXDXDXD

    • @JCLegendary
      @JCLegendary 7 років тому +13

      The only way that could have been better is if Superman had actually shown up and went Mortal Kombat on the guy.

  • @cherokeewarcry
    @cherokeewarcry 3 роки тому +21

    It was *_OFFNESIVE!_* It was *_HILARIOUS!_* It was *_AWESOME!_*
    I was a teenage ninja in the '80s and _Sho Kosugi was my hero!_
    Thank you for for this! I will immediately _not_ illegally download it!

  • @Poonard
    @Poonard 7 років тому +41

    Razorfist, can you basically just do a Cannon Films marathon? I mean. I just fucking love them so much and you seem to have a huge appreciation for the stuff too. PLEASE? lolol

  • @jasondavis378
    @jasondavis378 7 років тому +117

    don't drink while watching Razorfist.....it's fatal to your electronics.

    • @abelbabel8484
      @abelbabel8484 7 років тому +7

      Yeah, good advice - I just had a near miss.

    • @CrysResan
      @CrysResan 7 років тому +2

      same. fucking ninja grannie lol

    • @SexyMonsterLover
      @SexyMonsterLover 7 років тому

      You mean a near hit.

    • @abelbabel8484
      @abelbabel8484 7 років тому +3

      No, it's actually called a near miss; I was uncertain and just looked it up.
      "OSHA provides the following definition of a near miss in an Accident Investigation Fact Sheet:
      …incidents where no property was damaged and no personal injury sustained, but where, given a slight shift in time or position, damage and/or injury easily could have occurred."
      www.plantservices.com/articles/2010/06nearmiss/

    • @SexyMonsterLover
      @SexyMonsterLover 7 років тому +1

      Some one doesn't watch george carlin

  • @dogyamato5619
    @dogyamato5619 7 років тому +75

    God I need this film. the old lady fighting scene Is so ridiculous

    • @baconghoti
      @baconghoti 7 років тому +9

      Dog Yamato also find a copy of Tongan Ninja. He's the Tongan Ninja because he's a ninja from Tonga - actual film line.

    • @adman1381
      @adman1381 6 років тому +2

      Dog Yamato
      It’s now available on Amazon Prime!

    • @andrewkerbs5289
      @andrewkerbs5289 6 років тому +1

      What a gruesome death scene. I couldn't sleep for weeks after seeing this and I was only 8!

    • @zetetick395
      @zetetick395 5 років тому +2

      She's one kick-ass ninja grandma!

    • @trueblueclue
      @trueblueclue 5 років тому

      Ridiculous or 80's?

  • @alexroyster182
    @alexroyster182 5 років тому +11

    I remember going to the drive in with my best friend and dad to watch Chuck Norris in the Octagon. Still love that movie.

  • @KTF0
    @KTF0 7 років тому +47

    i used to work in a costume store and I still see little kids dress up as ninjas, hell, even some girls, and not as a backup costume, they specifically ask for it. I'm surprised that ninjas haven't made a full fledged comeback.

    • @MachineMan-mj4gj
      @MachineMan-mj4gj 6 років тому +10

      Well, they're not as popular in their pure form today as they were even twenty years ago, but ninjas were never "not cool."

    • @RandomAmerican3000
      @RandomAmerican3000 3 роки тому +7

      They made a comeback. You just didn't see them.

  • @ferox965
    @ferox965 7 років тому +4

    I was a kid when Enter and Revenge of the Ninja, and Ninja 3 came out. These movies were FUCKING HUGE. I must have rented them a zillion times. Managed to find them all on DVD decades later and love them still.., lots of memories.

  • @sjadams8941
    @sjadams8941 7 років тому +75

    "Behold; Ted Nugent's worst nightmare."

    • @seatspud
      @seatspud 7 років тому +18

      Aside from actually getting drafted and sent to 'nam right after shitting himself.
      [rimshot]

  • @elgamerico
    @elgamerico 7 років тому +13

    That swerve where Sho Kosugi finds out his "friend" is a ninja, was of Vince Russo epic proportions :)

  • @TheVileOne
    @TheVileOne 7 років тому +7

    This review had me dying. I just about blew a gasket at the mention of "Mad Gear" gang. Props for not making a Village People joke.

  • @LuisRosa72
    @LuisRosa72 7 років тому +21

    Finally! The wait was worth it, this is one of my all-time favorite movies. Thanks Razor, and keep the 80's cinematic magic flowing!

  • @J.J.Spencer
    @J.J.Spencer 7 років тому +6

    HELL YES.
    Great, over the top 80's action AND Battle Beast as the closing bumper? I'm sold.

  • @Jaeha8
    @Jaeha8 7 років тому +79

    Finally another cinema.

  • @jdtroup198683
    @jdtroup198683 7 років тому +63

    Sho Kousgi the original ninja master
    You should see his sons doing the Ninja franchise.
    Kyō haha kusosupīdo

  • @CRITTERBUSTERS
    @CRITTERBUSTERS 7 років тому +8

    Sho Kosugi is legendary, the first movie I saw him in was Pray For Death and he blew me away.

  • @deluth4638
    @deluth4638 7 років тому +115

    Can you imagine the shitstorm that would ensue if this was released today? hahaha

    • @nonmihiseddeo4181
      @nonmihiseddeo4181 7 років тому +21

      alucard624: The only thing difficult about imaging that scenario is hiding how excited I'd be to see it.

    • @oz70nyc50
      @oz70nyc50 7 років тому +18

      De Luth Sure fire way to explode some SJW heads.

    • @Outlaw8908
      @Outlaw8908 3 роки тому +6

      That would make me want to see it more.

  • @comradecthulhu6052
    @comradecthulhu6052 7 років тому +18

    Hey Razor this is off topic but, I just want to say thanks for igniting my love of 80s heavy metal bands like Judas Priest, Grim Reaper, and kickass guitarists like Yngwie Malmsteem. I never knew i would love 80s heavy metal before I subscribed to you, but after watching your Metal Mythos series of videos i have a newfound love for the genre. Thank you and GOD FUCKING SPEEEED RAZORFIST!!

  • @cruddddddddddddddd
    @cruddddddddddddddd 4 роки тому +5

    I love The Octagon. Me and my dad used to watch it when I was a kid. Ah nostalgia

  • @BestWayKilla
    @BestWayKilla 7 років тому +55

    You know, normally I'd feel compelled to speak in defense of MMA, which I know you aren't a fan of, and use my own experience as a fan and someone who has seen the sport live and grapples every week, but honestly, with the WWE-esque bullshit the UFC engages in these days, I really don't feel like they deserve it. I'll simply leave you with the recommendation that you look into a magical entity that started in 1997 and came to an end a decade ago called Pride Fighting Championships, which combines much of the pageantry and showmanship of pro wrestling with real fights, and adds in the batshit lunacy of Japan to make it truly memorable. Incidentally, due to its pro wrestling origins, there's a lot more concrete evidence of actual worked fights in Pride, but that doesn't take away from its greatness when it was legit.
    And with regards to the review itself, I must thank you for another superb entry in the Rageaholic Cinema and sincerely hope that more of the distilled essence of excellence that is Cannon Films finds its way on here in the future. Might I be so bold as to humbly request a review of Bloodsport?
    In any event, keep having the most awesome channel on UA-cam, sir. God fucking Speed!

    • @BestWayKilla
      @BestWayKilla 7 років тому +2

      +Mbk606 I certainly do enjoy the more grappling-centric, realistic Japanese style of pro wrestling, and it's impact on MMA can't be understated. Guys like Funaki, Suzuki, and Tamura all have their roots as pro wrestlers, and they all went on to have prolific MMA careers. In fact, the reason I got into the sport in the first place was because of Ken Shamrock, who I recognized from his WWF days, and who has his roots in Japanese pro wrestling as well. Most of those original Pancrase fighters have that as their roots, and I do love watching those old fights, even the worked ones. Sakuraba also had that as his background, and look how legendary his career is.
      My big problem with today's UFC, however, is them trying to ape the most insipid, idiotic things about the WWE. From the very insistent promotion of idiots like Ronda Rousey and Conor McGregor for their most superficial aspects, to the pandering to casuals who care more about what's said at a press conference than the actual fights, it all just turns me off, and it effects their matchmaking as well. An organization like Pride did it right, with their elaborate stage designs, ridiculous backstage skits, and crazy entrances. The UFC just looks to appeal to the lowest common denominator.

    • @CGoody564
      @CGoody564 7 років тому +1

      Mbk606 you kind of have to. I love MMA, I enjoy UFC and Bellator among other promotions, but you'd be ignorant to say the UFC isn't taking more and more of a WWE-like mindset and have been for quite a bit.
      I do enjoy the trash talk a lot of the time, but the rankings should be dictating the fights save for matchups that are personal or people are clamming for, and that's only if it's reasonable. what's going now is entertaining in its own way I guess... but I'm not sure I'm thrilled with the direction it's heading.

    • @BestWayKilla
      @BestWayKilla 7 років тому

      Cory Goodman We've definitely come a long way from the days of Fedor, Nogueira, and Cro Cop all fighting each other in title fights. Now, everyone wants to sit around and name who they want to fight after becoming champions, instead of fighting the best challenger. I get wanting to get paid more, but they also want no part of actually risking their championship status. Look at McGregor, who has never defended a belt in the UFC and looks like he never will. Look at Bisping, wanting to fight GSP instead of any actual middleweight contender. It's really sickening as a fan of the sport.

    • @SAM-ru4vx
      @SAM-ru4vx 7 років тому +1

      its sad to see conor mcgregor hold 2 divisions and ufc hostage because he is waiting for the mayweather fight that might never happen.

    • @BestWayKilla
      @BestWayKilla 7 років тому +1

      It is an absolute farce. McGregor hasn't once defended a belt at all in the UFC, and yet they continue to enable him. I'm all for a fighter making a stand for what they think they're worth, but if it's for shit like this, it's absolutely ridiculous to keep letting them pick their own fights and not put their championship status on the line. They let him fight Alvarez just so they had the chance to promote him as a two-division champion (something Dan Henderson already did anyway), and they ended up stripping him of the FW belt almost immediately after he won, which essentially made it nothing more than a glorified prop. And all this after he was already exposed by Diaz. That's the kinda shit that makes me really sour on the UFC these days.

  • @ianeurysm
    @ianeurysm 7 років тому +5

    Eff yes! watched it 50 times as a kid. Amazing soundtrack. Sho Kosugi OG

  • @scottdodge6979
    @scottdodge6979 3 роки тому +5

    So I have binge watched these reviews and seen most of the films on here, some due to your reviews which are an absolute joy to watch. I just gotta say that dude in the cowboy hat with the feather has got to be the most flamboyant inner city gangster I have ever seen in any film.

  • @perfecto25
    @perfecto25 7 років тому +2

    this was so fantastic
    I grew up on American Ninja flicks. Brings back the memories.

  • @omarmorel4420
    @omarmorel4420 2 роки тому +3

    sho kosugi was the true lord and master of my local video store back in the day

  • @GizmoHibiki
    @GizmoHibiki 7 років тому +16

    I'm hankerin' for a Demolition Man review next.

  • @Blackmetalhooligan
    @Blackmetalhooligan 6 років тому +6

    I just discovered your channel and seeing a review of this movie made me fall in love

  • @DomoArigatoMrRobaito
    @DomoArigatoMrRobaito 7 років тому +1

    Wow... I haven't seen this movie in ages. Now I want desperately to see this movie again. I loved this movie. Ninjas were amazing!

  • @AkuTenshiiZero
    @AkuTenshiiZero 7 років тому +53

    "Tokyo, Japan." I'm sorry is this supposed to be the 1980's or the 1880's? Because there's a bit less concrete and steel in that scene than I would expect to see In Tokyo.

    • @DeHerg
      @DeHerg 3 роки тому +5

      Because its actually Kyoto

  • @GentleHeretic
    @GentleHeretic 7 років тому +92

    What are the odds of a Punisher '89 review?

    • @GentleHeretic
      @GentleHeretic 7 років тому +5

      Maybe a retrospective leading up to the release of the Netflix series?

    • @JarJarBinks4ever
      @JarJarBinks4ever 7 років тому +10

      War Zone is great

    • @SAVikingSA
      @SAVikingSA 7 років тому +5

      Jacob, I think you and I are the only two people who have ever seen that movie.

    • @GentleHeretic
      @GentleHeretic 7 років тому +3

      SAVikingSA I found a blog about cult movies once, the writer was a huge fan of it. Guess that makes three of us, which is a shame because it's a pretty good example of what's great about 80's action movies, even if it forgets it's a comic book film at times.

    • @GentleHeretic
      @GentleHeretic 7 років тому

      I would love if it were both. I just think it errs on the side of caution and values vaguely plausible Yakuza and Mafia mooks over exaggerated, comic book villains, resulting in a more realistic (!) film. The balance just feels off.

  • @ferox965
    @ferox965 7 років тому +1

    I remember these when they came out..(I was born in 76) .The video rental craze was full on...My parents used to let me rent this stuff...I was a huge fan of the "Ninja Trilogy"...Got reacquainted with these much later (they were hard as hell to find on DVD)...I still love them, especially Revenge of the Ninja...Sho Kosugi was my fave back then...EVERYTHING was ninja back then...

  • @holden6104
    @holden6104 7 років тому +1

    One of my favorite movies when I was a kid. Can still quote it from memory.

  • @alucard624
    @alucard624 4 роки тому +3

    Glad you included those clips from the Cannon Films documentary. That was a very entertaining documentary.

  • @goreds551
    @goreds551 5 років тому +10

    13:26 No 80's action is complete without an interracial street gang.

  • @dragons_red
    @dragons_red 7 років тому +10

    Loved Sho Kosugi and those movies as a kid in the 80s. Hella campy tho

  • @OrdoMallius
    @OrdoMallius 5 років тому +11

    When I was a kid watching this I thought the gangsters were mad at him for breaking the doll.

  • @mr.xcomics6071
    @mr.xcomics6071 4 роки тому +3

    Just ordered this movie. Damn I miss the ‘80’s sometimes

  • @Kylenashari
    @Kylenashari 3 місяці тому

    These films fueled my desire to get involved in martial arts. 15 years later I was in japan, training with a legitimate Ninja master. Thank you 1980s..

  • @Predator19344556
    @Predator19344556 7 років тому +15

    Mother of god a 20 min rageaholic film review i think my nads just launched into low level orbit.

  • @DBSG1976
    @DBSG1976 7 років тому +1

    This is why I love this channel! I'm a child of the 80's and ninjas were so popular back then, they actually had ninja magazines on the shelves in supermarkets and this review captures the spirit of those movies perfectly (I'd love a review of American Ninja). I would use this video to demonstrate why this is my favorite channel on UA-cam: hilarious, creative, intelligent, and memorable...keep them coming Razor, fantastic work and great editing by Terran...as usual!

  • @jeflaw1996
    @jeflaw1996 3 роки тому +2

    I saw this movie as a teenager and it was f*cking awesome!

  • @sergioochoa913
    @sergioochoa913 7 років тому +27

    So this was Ninja Gaiden movie? Sweet and people says that you can't make a good videogame movie.
    Now can you make a Rageaholic about highlander or hard boiled?

  • @ThomasBoyce5000
    @ThomasBoyce5000 2 роки тому

    "Short Round has a short fuse"
    This movie embodies all the tropes of those great 80's ninja movies in the best possible way.

  • @tcschenks
    @tcschenks 7 років тому +1

    One of my favorite movies when I was a kid.

  • @dd11111
    @dd11111 Рік тому

    I love that after he get out of the hottub the main character starts backfliping away, and not to be outdone. The Guy chasing him starts backflipping too!

  • @ArdentPardy
    @ArdentPardy Місяць тому

    LOVED Sho Kosugi's Ninja movies when I was a kid. Still have fond memories

  • @revenile
    @revenile 6 років тому +2

    Good to see the rule of Ninjas applies here. When it's a single ninja vs a group, the group sands no chance.

  • @russellward4624
    @russellward4624 5 років тому

    This is the best ninja movie ever made. I was fortunate enough to grow up during this time. Had ninja suits and weapons and we used to run the streets at night in full gear having ninja wars with smoke bombs made of baby powder. Oh the days when unthought ninjas were real and wanted to be one when I grew up. Lol

  • @gettimabodybag6213
    @gettimabodybag6213 6 місяців тому

    I grew up watching Sho Kosugi & his sons in the 80's. Awesome movies. I think I watched every Cannon film group film back then.

  • @orlandoventor1754
    @orlandoventor1754 6 років тому +9

    "What are you? Some kinda kid or something."

  • @BIOHAZARDCURE
    @BIOHAZARDCURE 7 років тому +15

    Goddammit this channel is a hidden Gem. \M/

  • @htickle1
    @htickle1 5 років тому +5

    here’s a fun fact, both of Shõ Kousgi son’s appeared in this movie:
    Kane Kosugi played the part of Short Round and
    Shane Kosugi play the part of the son who took a shuriken to the face (1:54 into the review).

    • @stannnleee3440
      @stannnleee3440 3 роки тому +1

      i love this film and i love fun facts! the kosugi sons are such nice boys! I took a test prep class with one of them back in the 90s. He was so cute !!!!!

  • @yissnakklives8866
    @yissnakklives8866 3 роки тому

    YES! Stumbling upon these gems of the interwebs years too late, but DAMN! These were MY movies! I saw this in the actual theater! Little known fact of the 80s, there were ninjas everywhere...

  • @GaryGoRound-to7ld
    @GaryGoRound-to7ld 5 років тому +1

    love this movie...watched it a million times when I was kid ...and at least 1-2x yr now

  • @METALDEMON502
    @METALDEMON502 3 місяці тому

    One of favorite movies as a kid. This review was EPIC!!

  • @Lieutenant_Dude
    @Lieutenant_Dude 7 років тому +1

    I saw this at 13 on late night satellite tv at my friend's house. It was awesome. I still remember the first thing I ever saw from it. Spitting caltrops in a dude's face.

  • @1521Palm
    @1521Palm 7 років тому +1

    Grew up with this movie. LOVE. IT.

  • @Taverens_Pull
    @Taverens_Pull 7 років тому

    I randomly found this movie about 4 years ago on youtube. It was the best surprise b-movie i ever discovered.

  • @hershellumiere
    @hershellumiere 7 років тому +1

    I remember this movie. This and american ninja were my favorites

  • @minutemanhomestead7214
    @minutemanhomestead7214 7 років тому +25

    dude that was nutz i havent laughed like that in a while great job

  • @jacksonjacob7791
    @jacksonjacob7791 3 роки тому

    This movie was alot of fun. Extremely campy and the fight choreography was excellent. Solid recommendation.

  • @geraldburke5147
    @geraldburke5147 3 роки тому +1

    This movie MADE ME, actually made me go out and buy as many chinese stars as I could...and ultimately destroy my parents backyard fence with my singular devotion to that ancient art. Great film, high cheese content...

  • @seanvolk4202
    @seanvolk4202 3 роки тому +1

    I watched this video so many times as an 80s youth!

  • @jackobrien47
    @jackobrien47 3 роки тому +4

    Ninjutsu involves way more hot tubs than I had been led to believe

  • @jerrym1218
    @jerrym1218 3 роки тому +1

    Sho Kousgi and Sonny Chiba are my favorite Oriental action stars of all time after Bruce Lee putting his stamp on the Asian action star in the popular main stream during his time. They can literally make you believe that they can punch through people and tear them up with their own bare hands.

  • @Oskarisadog
    @Oskarisadog 7 років тому

    Razor, your cinema reviews are the very best on UA-cam. They never disappoint and I always rewatch.

  • @MrOplef
    @MrOplef 7 років тому +1

    It's been a while since you've done this kind of video. Glad to see them back.

  • @GhettoFabulousLorch
    @GhettoFabulousLorch 7 років тому

    Good to see this movie get some recognition. RotN is basically the movie that plays in your head when you hear or even think about the words "ninja" and "movies" in sequence.

  • @leopoldglasspool4261
    @leopoldglasspool4261 4 роки тому

    I loved this movie when I was a kid. I haven't seen it since about 1990 or so. Soooo funny to see this years later.

  • @ronniehopper2726
    @ronniehopper2726 7 років тому +5

    18:58 20 bucks says that kid relives that memory when he turns 13

  • @23RedTechno
    @23RedTechno 7 років тому +4

    Ninja's and bad ass action movies of the 80's give me more FUCK YEAH !

  • @slavshuravesky3617
    @slavshuravesky3617 6 років тому +1

    I saw this in the original theatrical release. It was an epic movie!

  • @walter80922
    @walter80922 7 років тому +1

    thank you Xenu! been waiting with great anxiety for a new rageaholic cinema.

  • @Zelousmarineinspace
    @Zelousmarineinspace 7 років тому +6

    *[THE DEFINITIVE RAZÖRFIST RULES OF 80's ACTION MOVIES]*
    *(0)* It *MUST* be directed by Cannon Films and nobody the fuck else.
    *(1)* Politely wait your turn to die.
    *(2)* HOLY FUCK IT'S GODDAMN LASERS!!
    *(3)* Unless your name is Jessie "The Body" Ventura, to wield a Minigun, you must scream your everloving nuts off.
    *(4)* ... Wrong!
    *(5)* Behind every door, there is a Burt Fucking Reynolds!
    *(6)* Every Shuriken thrown hits its target with pinpoint accuracy.
    *(7)* NEVER bring a knife to a gun fight.
    *(8)* NEVER bring a weapon of any description to a fight with Charles Bronson, if you want to escape with at least half your testicles intact.
    *(9)* To be related to Charles Bronson is to mean Certain *DEATH!*
    *(10)* To be friends with Chuck Norris is to mean Certain *DEATH!*
    *(11)* To be a partner of Dirty Harry is to mean Certain *DEATH!*
    *(12)* Every object, no matter how inconspicuous or vague, up to and including a belt buckle, may in fact be, a fucking Ninja Star.
    *(13)* Save the best scene for last.
    *(14)* In the beginning, middle, and/or end of the film, there must be an 80's Montage set to a Synth track.
    *(15)* Chuck Norris's Kevlar Beard is also the source of his power.
    *(16)* If Jean Claude Van Dame's hand is starting to reach for his belt-line, his pants have already come off.
    *(17)* Always phrase your answer in the form of a question.
    *(18)* Every one liner MUST be followed by a Key-taur riff.
    *(19)* 3/4ths mark must have Main character in mortal danger to help conjure up a false sense of drama.
    *(20)* Every man in a brightly coloured shirt must end up dead.
    *(21)* NEVER, in a Steven Segal movie, under any circumstance, play Pool.
    *(22)* Touching Burt Reynolds's penis is like making eye contact with fucking Medusa.
    *(23)* It must have a Soundtrack more heavy metal than the bottom third of the Periodic Table.
    *(24)* To fashion the creation of the 80's action hero, you must do one thing: Murder every organic being he's ever had fucking contact with.
    *(25)* You can't fight the Ninja forever, but it's the 80's and well, you can goddamn try.
    *(26)* Never let the Japanese get the element of surprise.
    *(27)* It MUST include someone using the insult "Jive Ass Bastard" else everyone be infected with virginity.
    *(28)* All *Real* men apply fuckin Eyeliner!
    *(29)* The only thing deadlier than a Ninja, is a Ninja with a fucking hot tub.
    *(30)* 80's films don't need thought; they need Ninjas, Tities, and oh hey did I mention a fucking Flamethrower?!
    *(31)* All the main villain does by beating up the protagonist is fill up his ultra meter, because this IS Street Fighter bitch!
    *(32)* 80's Thug Logic: When you are surrounding an object that you think hides the hero: Fire every weapon, preferably a Sub Machine Gun, you have at it for at least an entire minute.
    *(33)* It's a movie, it's the 80's and by GOD, Computers are magic.
    *(34)* Naked Boobs. Heavin' Tities. Nuff said.
    *(35)* Mad Max will always be a 4 wheeled WESTERN, so Max is the man with no name.
    *(36)* At some point, somewhere in the world, at any given time, Jean Claude Van Dame is butt naked.
    *(37)* Everything that can explode, will explode because Fuck you it's the 80's. DEAL WITH IT.
    *Also must include:*
    - Badguy with a Moustache
    - Chase scene with no purpose except to turn every white-blooded American male from indifferent and in flaccid to attentive and capable of carving a detailed diamond sculpture with his dong
    - More Moustaches than a Leather bar in Happy hour/a George Michael pool party
    - Main character who is a "Hero" that runs around beating the living shit out of everyone he encounters
    - "Hero" having a Leather Jacket, Aviator Glasses, and a burnt match sticking out of his (or her) mouth
    - A "Vengeful Exposition Factory" that solely produces Lava, Sparks, and over the top Main Antagonist brutal death scenes which can include exploding the fuck up
    - Anima-goddamn-tronics
    - It CAN take place within the Great Mullet Massacre of 1900 and 91 if it has
    - Steven Segal or Chuck Norris and
    - Gina Gershon's magnificent melons
    - The fact that we are all a dream within the mullet bedecked mind of Chuck fucking Norris
    - Steve Buscemi
    - An inspiration to write vapid 80's grunge music
    - A clandestine Ninja Smack-ring
    - A triad of suspiciously multicultural shitheels
    - The words "Snake Plissken wielding an Uzi on a fucking Hang-Glider" in the film script
    - Leather Jacket, Sawn-off Shotgun, Omnipresent Automotive Carnage featuring a Mauser C96, and most importantly, mother fucking *MOTOCYCLES!*
    **phew!** that was everything.

  • @Yarn01
    @Yarn01 7 років тому

    This has got to be your funniest video yet dude. And that's not a low bar.

  • @nicholasm.9274
    @nicholasm.9274 7 років тому +2

    If I'm not mistaken Razor, that's Prof. Toru Tanaka (aka SUB-ZERO / The Running Man) @ 12:46. Funny that he gets killed by being strangled by wire similarly to his demise in the Arnie flick.

  • @goreds551
    @goreds551 5 років тому +2

    Mad Gear gang, perfect description. LOL

  • @mylifeisacomplexpastiche7901
    @mylifeisacomplexpastiche7901 7 років тому +5

    "With that, they head to the-- *WHEEEEEN* THE _FUCK_ DID NIGHTWOLF JOIN THE MAFIA?!"

    • @andrewbignell9342
      @andrewbignell9342 3 роки тому

      And he has a stereotypical tomahawk when in the other scene he doesn't have it then he does .after they all flew through the windshield

    • @andrewbignell9342
      @andrewbignell9342 3 роки тому

      YEAH!!! but, we didn't dress like that in the '80's

    • @rumblebird9888
      @rumblebird9888 6 місяців тому

      NightWolf was best member of the mafia

  • @moviemetalhead
    @moviemetalhead 7 років тому

    Aside from American Ninja, this was how I thought ninjas should look and fight when I was a kid. This was my favorite ninja movie back then.

  • @brianmcavanaugh
    @brianmcavanaugh 4 роки тому +1

    This movie was phenomenal checked it out and the rest of the trilogy. Great stuff especially Ninja 3.

  • @borderlord
    @borderlord 5 років тому

    Ole Sho Kosugi ,one of my 1980s Heroes as a 14 year old kid...bought this on video ...started me on my quest to become a Ninja...which ended about 5 years later when I discovered the pub !

  • @Sw0rDMaNz
    @Sw0rDMaNz 5 років тому +1

    That Ultimo Dragon thing got me.

  • @Hispandinavian
    @Hispandinavian 6 років тому +1

    Holy poopoo! Who tapped into my 1980s childhood? Who Kosugi was classic movie kickass!

  • @Pattorihanzo
    @Pattorihanzo 7 років тому +1

    Jesus H Fucking Christ! These are greatest videos. Metal mythos, music mythos, rageaholic cinema are the best videos. I can’t stop watching these!

  • @TheAustinWoolShow
    @TheAustinWoolShow 7 років тому +15

    still waiting for Conan: The Barbarian(1982)

  • @leadvendor
    @leadvendor 7 років тому +2

    I've missed Rageaholic Cinema. Thank you.

  • @Murry_in_Arizona
    @Murry_in_Arizona 4 роки тому +3

    The Hunted the Christopher Lambert ultra slaughter fest awaits your review.

  • @WTFIW777
    @WTFIW777 7 років тому

    I own this on VHS and it was one of my fav movies to watch as a kid but ridiculous as it was I loved it!

  • @rulegm
    @rulegm 7 років тому

    The Mad Gear Gang!!!! I'm in tears!! Nice shout out to Final Fight!

  • @acegrafik
    @acegrafik 5 років тому

    Still got this on bootleg VHS with "Ninja III: The Domination" .Great 80's flicks.And the beats,man,the beats...Rip them on mp3 and on my phone for ringing tone.

  • @technoir1119
    @technoir1119 7 років тому +2

    It was a glorious time to be a kid in the 80's during the ninja fad.

  • @jeremypickard2372
    @jeremypickard2372 5 років тому +2

    Dude why can't you do 1 of these 80's movie reviews every day??? I need it.

  • @joeyroy7864
    @joeyroy7864 7 років тому +7

    NINJAS!!!!!!!
    *edit* Octagon... Please... Needs must occur.