As a 24-year-old who’s currently living at home rent-free, I’m definitely a believer that it’s not inherently problematic. I work full-time and pay for all of my other expenses. Living with my parents is making it possible for me to save some money for the future instead of barely scraping by during a cost of living crisis, and I’m so beyond grateful for that.
I'm so glad that you're able to have this opportunity and definitely agree it's not inherently a problem. Also, this show was filmed over a decade ago. Nearly 15 years ago and the context with housing and cost of living now IS different.
As someone who has been contributing to the household financially since they were 15 I can say I agree with you. I feel like it set me back a ton and I'm already burnt out at 25 from working + never got to finish college going full time because the load was too much.
Also some of us are disabled. Like, am I supposed to move out into homelessness because I can't work just to not be seen as a failure for being at home while over 18?
It’s a wonderful thing to be able to have the opportunity to live with parents. Stay there as long as possible. The money you save will be worth it in the long run, trust me!
The issue, imo, isn't living with your parents. It's being UNGRATEFUL for it, not contributing in some way (doing chores or paying a small amount of rent). That's more the issue.
@@RoseDoesIt With the mom's attitude, the dad probably knows better than to speak up and cause a conflict. With how frustrated he is, I bet he tried in the past and learned that it was futile.
I live at home and don't pay rent. I DO however help with chores, cooking, buying groceries, and helping my mom generally get errands done because i work in the locality of the big shopping center. Also, my mom started us on money management and budgeting and spending tracking early. We tracked our savings accounts and our cash in and out of our wallets growing up, so we got that financial prep from a different angle.
I definitely think that you can live with your parents and still be an independent adult if that makes sense? I know people who still live with their parents but pay their own bills, buy their own food, help cook and clean, and do their own laundry and such. I think there’s a difference between essentially being a roommate with your parents and being an adult child.
@@JackyDomashinski That's how it is for me. I live with my mother and grandma, but I pay rent, pay a share of the utilities, buy all my own groceries, and clean up after myself.
It really depends. I was doing about half the house work while living with my parents, the problem wasn't of I was doing my own laundry, it was my parents keeping me small. So it's definitely possible if you have parents who are able to see you as an independent adult. Both sides need to be able to have adult dynamics with the other.
My take on Gail's point isn't that an adult child couldn't be independent and live at home, it's that that would probably not happen in that specific dynamic.
I’m so here for this content. Seeing actual examples of people overconsuming and getting massively into debt is a wake up call for me that I could end up in that kind of debt if I don’t change my habits. Watching your channel is slowly changing my mindset on my finances and spending.
hard agree, at first i used to think "pfft well at least im not that bad!" but the more i watch im like "dear god, that could be me, i need to change ASAP". this channel has helped change so many of my thought processes.
rachel's parents definitely enabled her by not setting boundaries with her financially, but also by not trusting her to do things on her own. good on gail for requiring that in four weeks the goals will be met, instead of the timeline of a year plus that the mom set. that felt like how long the *mom* needed to let go of rachel. if the mom had her way, rachel would be living in their home forever, dependent on her for everything. the way i see it, the mom does not want to let go of parenting/taking care of rachel, which is setting her back developmentally and socially. i predict a low- to no-contact relationship in the future for the mom, because she truly believes the daughter needs her to survive. it really is too bad she can't see her daughter's potential; parents can have the best intentions, but their actions have consequences. rachel did amazing in this, i'm so proud of her getting the $5k at the end! on that, gail is wayyyy more supportive than rachel's mom is, which makes me think she hasn't had the same reaction/support from her mom. no reaction from the mom to her success worries me, because it seems like the mom wants to cut her off completely if she can't have that control of rachel's care. the "she'll go to you for debt repayment" comment felt so mean, it makes me wonder if the mom will ever acknowledge the success of rachel. your analysis of the relationships in this and how all that affects the finances was well-informed and articulate, i really enjoy these episodes! 💖
I think you're on to something with this. The comment about the she'll go to you when she get's into debt again felt really off. Same with her saying the show was a bad experience and the mom didn't acknowledge the success or encourage her basically at all!
@@shawnaripariexactly. The umbilical cord has not been cut and this is what’s causing the problems. By taking away the responsibility from Rachel her mom stood in the way of learning. From how Rachel handled the tasks it becomes obvious that she is ready to live on her own and should not wait for her mom’s approval. Otherwise, she may never get it. Some moms are like that, overly worried and protective of their children, even when they are not anymore.
I was very enmeshed with my mom and she would have had this type of attitude if someone else had told her she was holding me back. She never told me I couldn't do things but I have anxiety and she'd consistently 'save me' by doing for me (like phone calls etc) and made it like that was her being a good mom instead of offering me tools to learn how to do things myself. That way she never told me I wasn't going to make it, but by accepting her help in times of panic/anxiety, I always felt like a failure who couldn't make it on my own. Moving out and starting therapy was the only thing that helped me. Distance, independence and boundaries were the way.
oh god im you but younger. ill hopefuly be moving out early next year at the latest and tear myself out of this spiral. i hope i can get better at being a human being
@fr4nkensk4nk You will! Took me a while to figure how to even learn what my identity is, but it happens and it's great! It's difficult to not have the relationship you thought you had with your parent(s) but having a real relationship with yourself is amazing! Good luck, you've got this!
@@fr4nkensk4nkYou got this! I‘ve also been there, especially the being enabled and coddled in my dysfunctional anxious patterns. If I may give a suggestion for something that helped me and doesn‘t require moving out or therapy (though I suggest it ofc): Delay. Start small, something triggers your anxiety, see if you can just wait and sit with it for a couple of minutes before you share it with someone else. I learned that not only would experiencing anxiety not kill me (it‘s a shit feeling though), I could eventually even guide myself out of it. The confidence this brings is incredible. Whatever I can do, you can do as well. All the best!
I also agree with Gail, the mother is the main issue. She is using her child as an emotional crutch and I hope the daughter will be able to separate herself!
I was totally wondering where the men were. Lol. I have seen some doosies of financial missteps from guys. The terms Princess and Moron probably make the shows more memorable for marketing
Wow, poor Rachael. I hope she managed to escape Mummy Dearest. I expect the overspending was kind of a rebellion against the parents. And her expectations for the place she would live probably came from MD too - "you can't move out until you can get a huge palace". It was great to see how excited she was to move out and how she rose to the challenges.
I was thinking the same. Like, in what generation have adult children moved to a home of the same standards as their parents? Even in mine (GenX, young adults during the tech boom), the vast majority of us didn’t do that. My parents, grandparents, great-grandparents (Victorians) didn’t. And I am quite sure her parents didn’t either.
I am so here for Ms. Gail. I mean you too Shawna, just love Ms. Gail so far. I think Rachel just has "learned helplessness" because of some of the mother-daughter dynamics. Good on her for succeeding. I saw something the other day and obviously not every parent can do this but; Parents charged their adult kid rent while living with them but put it in savings. Gave it back to the adult child when they moved out as a deposit for their first house. Now obviously some parents actually need their adult child to contribute to rent but I thought that was such a great idea for parents that don't. That is such a gold standard, grade A, real friend. Hell yeah.
@marlyd the one post I saw the parents did it as a surprise. Personally I think the surprise is better but could be improved with doing a trust vs just a savings account. With terms like "can be used for first home", "used for college payments" but that would have to be parents collect rent and add it to what they're paying for college. Which I see as a plus because student loan rates are predatory as hell. I vote for honesty in where the money goes in that case like: "hey the money we save on having you pay your portion of the rent goes to paying for your college" type of thing. I don't have a 'logical' reason for that. I just feel like young adults whose parents are able to do something like this, would really appreciate it. And they would still be learning important financial knowledge about budgeting for rent and living expenses. Without, hopefully, the burden of student loans.
There are a lot of cultures around the world where families live in multi generational households and enjoy living with each other all of their lives. They certainly don't do this with adult children taking like they are infants. It's part of being an adult to see the value in relationships where there is reciprocity. It gives respect to everyone in the relationship and equal footing. For Rachel's own benefit she needs develop this way. Her mother's "bad" influence is just sad. The poor women probably feels like she will be discarded completely from her daughter's life if she doesn't bribe her.
My god Shawna I’ve been binge watching your videos for the last couple of weeks and you’ve made me think so much more critically about my purchases. I’ve been able to go “ooh this is cute but I don’t need it” to so many things I might’ve impulse purchased before. I’m so proud of myself. So thank you from this ADHD recovering impulse spender.
Happy you are learning it while you are young. I didn't have these kind of videos when I was young but was taught how to balance a checkbook, so good and bad. Overall good because housing was not like it is.
Oh hi my ADHD friend! Impulsive spending is really tough to deal with, but it seems like you‘re on a great path. One way in which my ADHD is working for me in terms of spending is that I usually add stuff to my cart, get distracted, and then end up forgetting about it. So getting myself to get stuff out of sight will often also help get it out of mind. Maybe that works for you as well!
as an american who never grew up with these shows, i haven't stopped watching since the episode you posted of till debt do us part, ive been marathoning the episodes LMAO i love it
Ooh where are you watching them? Hi from Slovenia, never heard about these shows before. They‘re interesting and motivating as is, but the cultural differences also fascinate me. (keeping in mind that they‘re not recent ofc)
I love when you do videos like this! In my opinion, you can cut out shopping. You can budget as best as you want but the best thing that helped me get out of debt was honestly finding a hobby. It filled my time instead of shopping.
Please consider doing professional closed captions either yourself or through a service like Rev so the Deaf audience (including myself) can have full access to your wonderful content! Especially if there's outside audio like a TV show, the captions will be missing entirely most of the time and there's no indication of who is saying what. Thanks!
I lived on campus for first year university and I vowed I'd never live at home again; I know some people can live at home and be adults but my parents would never be able to handle that. My mom didn't let me have my debit card until I moved out, I was earning my own money in highschool but I had to ask permission to withdraw any money ever. It really set me up for failure because I went from not being allowed to make my own choices ever to having complete freedom and I wasted a lot of money those first few years. But the ability to set my own bedtime, decide my own schedule and priorities, even just the privilege to get a snack from the fridge without asking permission, I could never go back. My mom criticized me spending any money on anything, to the point where I felt guilty buying bare necessities; to free myself from that, I developed the equally unhealthy numbness to all spending, and it has taken me years to calibrate what a realistic "yikes that's too much" price is on any given item. I can't say "if it's not free it's too expensive" and "nothing is too expensive" are equally damaging mindsets, but neither of them are healthy in the long term.
i wouldn't want to jump to any conclusions about people who were portrayed in 1 episode of a show, but rachel's experience resonates wildly with my own of abuse and i really hope that she's gotten therapy as well for that. all signs, to me, point to that rachel's mom only kept her around so that she could put rachel down and boost herself up by enabling careless behavior and blaming her for choosing to do it (gaslighting 101). really shitty dynamic! i'm glad that she got to at least see what's on the other side, because i feel like that's all you need to recognize the problematic dynamics and have a motivation to move forward
I think paying rent to live with your parents is also mostly a cultural thing Like in my country if you tell someone that you make your child pay rent they'll first think you're joking then talk shit about you to everyone behind your back when they realise you're not
One way to do it is to charge them rent, but save it and give it back to the kid when they're ready to buy their own house. Just a way to teach them some financial responsibility.
Yes!!! If my dad asked me for rent I would be devastated and assume he doesn't love me. It's just not done IF the family owns the house (very different if they're renting, in that case it makes sense for the adults to split rent).
@@marlyd I would assume it varies from family to family, I have only heard of the adult children contributing to it if there's financial hardship, but that might be because of my social bubble. One of the problems that surges then is that it makes one or more of the children to have more of a claim to the house after the parents die and it gets messy. Like, here the elderly don't go to homes unless they've been abandoned or have very high needs, so there's the understanding that parents don't charge you rent because you'll be taking care of them later.
I'm 26. My ex was financially abusive, and I'm digging myself out of almost 40k in debt. It's insanely hard. I'm back to living with my parents, after having my own home and mortgage, in dealing with the debt and divorce. Idk where I'm going with this. Debt sucks.
I really liked how encouraging it was to see someone change and become independent with guidance. Went back and watched your Til Debt Do Us Part video too!
I would love to see a where are they now show. Also it's so easy to buy stuff to forget what's going on on the world at the moment so thank you for being the voice of reason and I love the hair. Sending love from 🇬🇧
My relationship with my mother is similar to Rachel. Only except my mother wants control and intentionally set me up for failure in A LOT of areas. I am very blessed to live on my own and pay my own bills, im finally free! Would never have it any other way.
I am so grateful that I have parents that are able to support me while I’m in school. Additionally, my brother still lives at home despite having a good paying full time job. But this is because he is actively saving (properly, has a financial advisor, and doesn’t spend his money loosely. My parents are ready to watch their children, who they love, leave and see as they continue to grow as an adult. Getting a home, partner and children (if we want) have the career we want. They want us to be able to save more money than we could if we had rent to cover as well. That is not what this mom is doing. She WANTS to watch her daughter not be able to grow into her full potential. And I think that is so sad. Raising a child should be rooted in success for the child, showing them the way of “adult” life. Why raise her for 25 years only to keep her in the same position as a high schooler. If you are reading this, thank you for going down the jumble of thoughts typed out in a state of frustration and disappointment.
the things i would do for a $700/month basement suite that nice in Vancouver....girl did not know what was coming in a decade 😭😭 great video, love this series from you !
@@AceCarmichael i am restricted to pet friendly so in the last year of searching the lowest ive seen that would allow my dog and cat is 1800, oftentimes with no oven tho :D avg of 350 sqft lmfao
I have young 3 kids. I fully believe in teaching responsibility. I would have a hard time taking rent from my child (as an adult) however I like the idea of charging rent and secretly putting it into a savings account for them when they do move out on their own. I can’t force them to save but once the money is “mine” I can choose to do whatever feels right with it.
As a teacher I‘d say that responsibility is one of the most important things to teach a child. It is the foundation of independence and self-esteem in my opinion. It also allows you to be around the people you like, rather than the people you need.
I live in the UK and have watched all the till debt do us part and princess episodes on UA-cam! I love them both. Gail is brilliant. I do recall seeing a guy as the ‘princess’ in one of the princess episodes
That mom made me super angry. Having seen that co-dependency before (me, my own mother!), I've had times where it's gotten to the point where I've had to yell at her. I can be around her now, and it's completely different.
no one wants to struggle but its apart of life. a parent raises you and teaches you morals so when you grow up you know how to handle yourself when you do struggle. my parents help me out by hearing me out and being a sounding board but they arent going to pay away my bills and coddle me. right now theyre helping me out and im forever grateful
I was lucky to buy my home when I was 25. Like Rachel I was lucky enough to be living at home without paying rent. The difference being saw it as HUGE opportunity to save as much money as possible so could save for a deposit and move out as soon as I could. The deal I had was I had to be saving more money than I would’ve been paying on rent elsewhere to be able to live at home.
My daughter and her girl friend moved back home a couple of years ago to save money so they can go and live and travel overseas. They did, however, contribute to food shopping and did a lot of the cooking and cleaning. They both worked full time. They are now living overseas and travelling around Europe. I miss her like crazy but she needed to this thing for herself because she stayed home for longer than the average New Zealand kid because she had anorexia for 6 years and there is not a lot of help for that, here. But as soon as she was able she was out flatting, working full time and learning to manage on her own.
I agree that there can be circumstances when adult children can live at their parents home without paying rent, but I think that is mostly successful if there is a plan from the beginning for how long or for what circumstances this will keep going. I moved out at 16, but have used my parents home as a stopgap place to land between moves between different cities and so on. My sister and her family stayed with my parents too, waiting for their home to close. I think people who have parents who can support their children this way are very fortunate because they have a safety net others lack.
@@anpe4970 I'm a 29-year-old woman who lives with dad and stepmom, but it's very much normal in my culture to stay at home (even for married children) because houses are built to be for multiple families and rents are crazy high. Even then, I have my own space I'm responsible for, I cook and clean for myself and my pets, and pay for my own things. We basically are housemates that eat together on weekends lol
@anazuleta3079 I agree that if you live with your parents as an adult can very much be a cultural thing - in Scandinavia, where I am from, it is not very common because our societies value induvidualism a lot. However, I think it will only benefit everyone if the parents and adult children are able to diasconnect from the parent/child role and create the more "roommate" dynamic you spoke about. I think why the situation in this episode was not a successful one, was because the mother was not willing to allow the child to become an adult while living at home. By undermining her independence the mother created a situation where she was hindering her child rather than helping her.
I'm 37, and have been disabled since 93. The fact that I can't work a traditional job long term never stops people from looking down their noses and calling me lazy. And then, I see women like this. Excuse me, I need to go practice my firebending...🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 Edit: Ah, narc mom, that makes sense. Off to do more firebending, but for different reasons.
I lived at home with my parents until I was 23. They charged me $250 a month rent once I had a full time job for a month. They were living paycheck to paycheck, so it definitely helped with the grocery shopping. My mom also would buy me whatever I wanted when she went shopping (I didn’t ask for a lot and it was always reasonable.) and then she would help with my laundry when I was a little too busy. In a case like mine was, I totally get it. And I agreed with my parents that $250 was a reasonable amount.
I would love a little series of you reacting to these episodes! I think your insight as someone who's been in a similar situation adds an extra layer of depth and understanding missing from just the original show
I hope you continue this reaction content. It’s some of my new favorite from you ❤ I think there are a lot of complex dynamics going on here and I wish her all the best.
As someone who grew up with not a lot, I got into the bad habit of putting enjoying life before saving money when I had my own income. I always worked and paid my own bills, but always lived pay check to pay check cos I would put spending over saving. It took me years to change my habits and learn to save. I’m in my late twenties now and actually starting to have my own savings. Watching your videos helps keep me on track so thank you 💕
The mom appears uncomfortable about the prospect of it being just her and her husband in their home together. I’m curious about what drives the mom daughter dynamic.
I heard a really great suggestions that I think is a great compromise. Where the parents collect "rent", but then the parents also put that "rent money" aside to give back to the child when they move out. Could be for a security deposit, a down payment, whatever it may be. The rent essentially becomes savings.
My parents didn't charge rent but when we started working 16 at least 50% had to go into savings. After 18 we took over our own car insurance, gas, personal needs etc.
I've been hearing for years that i am unable to live without my mom. Well, here i am- living in another country, with amazing husband, two kids and job. I'm speaking 3 languages, i work in foreign language.❤ Never believe people who say: you're unable to do something.
You make a really good point. My sister was given my mom's old car (at least one of them) while I have had to buy any vehicles I've ever owned. She tricked my mom into co-signing for her student loans, which she now refuses to pay. I've had to pay for all of my schooling on my own. She believes my parents (and the world) owe her everything; I don't.
On the off chance Shawna sees this comment - First: love your content. Second: love the new hair. Now... my shopping habit was never too crazy. I'm not easily influenced and i know the difference between want and need. *however* i am guilty of occasional small spending sprees (less than $200) on makeup, shoes and my many creative hobbies. But in September of this year i found out i needed a surgery that was going to cost me several thousand dollars and i needed it as quickly as possible. I was forced into a No-Buy in order to save this money. There were weeks i spent less than $20 on my debit card. Every meal i had at work was leftovers from home. Honestly, It sucked sometimes. It took me 12 weeks but i did it and my surgery is scheduled soon... i could not have done it without you and your videos! And i could fill a book with everything I've learned about myself in the last 3 months... i cannot tell you thank you enough ❤❤❤ and my ongoing spending habits have been changed forever (Looking forward to actually having a savings account in the new year)
Congratulations, well done and all the best for your surgery! (not to get too political, but I wish you wouldn‘t have to pay thousands out of pocket. It‘s not like you‘re having the procedure for fun)
This show is so a 10000% US/Canada-coded, never related less to ANYTHING. The way they are all acting like she's a failure and super entitled because she lives at home and doesn't want to pay rent AT HER PARENTS PLACE at 24, I'm flabbergasted honestly. Like not saying she doesn't have bad financial habits and all that but WHAT?
I think rent is rational based on Gail’s argument but if you as a parents have the means to not need your child to pay rent it’s not unreasonable to set the “rent” aside for the adult child for later in life. Either to help them with a home in the future or further graduation or wedding gift or help them with moving expenses eventually.
As someone who has lived the last 10 years in a basement apartment, it really starts to grind you down and honestly I'm kinda starting to think they shouldn't be allowed.
I lived with my parents for a year and a half after I was out of college. Thankfully they did not make my pay rent. I worked 2 jobs, I put that money towards saving to move out and paying off my car that I had bought. Once I was able to do that I quit the second job and moved out on my own. Forever thankful for my parents to allow me to do that.
I think taking rent from there own child depends of the situation. When my sister saved for a apartment they didn´t took anything from the money she made. My brother on the other hand doesn´t want to move out and gets more money on his job then our mom so he needs to pay rent. But even that is less then 1/3 what an apartment costs.
I think the issue of the car is so location based. In most places in the US and Canada, there is literally no public transport. No train, no bus, nothing. Combine that with endless suburbia and sprawling cities, and you have a recipe for an unwalkable hellscape only transversable by car. So the only solution you have is to use rideshaing apps (expensive) or to bum rides off of family and friends (unreliable and can be impossible.) Basically, I think it's impossible to judge whether or not it's really coddling/'over the top' for parents to help buy or outright buy their kid a car without a thorough examination of the other transport options in the area.
@@binarystar5901 I’m Canadian and have lived in Toronto too, never had a cad. Having a car is a luxury, for most people you don’t need it. while it’s not ideal it’s manageable.
@katiemarie3 oh, you live in one of the most populated areas in your country and don't need a car? Clearly that means NO ONE ELSE would need a car! Especially people balls fucking deep in suburbia or people stuck in rural places! Nope, the world revolves around you and you don't need a car, so no one does!! Congratulations!!!! 🎉🥳🥳🎊
I believe that all parents owe their children is unconditional love and support. That does not mean enabling and doing everything for them. They're not synonymous. There is a middle ground to being there to support without spoiling or punishing. She got the expectation they would help her all the time from somewhere, her mum it seems. Also seems like dad doesn't know what's going on at all, and is uninterested.
In the UK it's common for adult children staying at home to pay "Dig money" or "Digs": A contribution to the household that's usually much less than rent and bills and usually reasonable for the child's income. I think it's a good way to get them into the habit of not spending their whole salary on fun.
I was privileged enough to live at home until I turned 30, at which time I was able to buy my own house. During that time, I was able to pay off my car loan, pay off my student loans and save up for the down payment on my home. I didn't pay rent when I live with my parents but I did pay for my own things like vet bills, healthcare, gas and food. I was able to start contributing to a 401k because I worked full-time. You can make it work!
I just wanna say, the parents are being great at providing everything for their daughter. I'm sure they're caring and loving parents. perhaps she is the only kid and still see her as their baby. sure her mom enabler behaviour is not good. her father seems like a good man too. they're just not ready to let her go. and the daughter itself not showing any progress. also, how the heck bank can approve easily of her credit card application when she does not have full time job?? in my country, it's very hard to get one cc
I’m 23 and live at home. I do pay $500 in rent which my parents put towards the mortgage and groceries but I also pay all of my own bills. I think it’s really important that parents teach their kids the value of money but also how saving and using your money smartly will benefit them in the future. Kids can definitely have fun money but they should be putting away most of their money because compound interest is on their side and that saved money can go towards their first car, school, a home etc. It’s definitely weird how the mom reacted and would put Rachel down about not being able to do it on her own. Parents should want their kids to do well and be able to live without them hovering and micro managing
Great listening i think she did really great once she was temporarily on her own and i think she learned budgeting her finances much much better when she moves back home again
Oooh that mama. I can’t imagine how it must feel to have a kiddo leave the nest but she’s not handling it well at all. I live in the US and haven’t seen this show but I’d agree she is the one with the poor attitude.
It's down to the individual most of all but it's also on the parents, my parents once I hit 18 were pretty clear on how it was, I could stay as long as I need but I need have a job, pay them rent and I need to have direction. If I didn't have any one of the three I was hounded constantly, to the point that I made it unbearable to live there, if I did the three things they asked of me my parents left me alone, there's balance
I am currently watching “Buy Now! The Shopping” conspiracy. I’m not sure if you have Netflix or access in Canada, but I’d love to see a reaction video on it. I knew a lot of the information in theory, but hearing people talk about things with examples, interviews, and footage. Horrifying. Makes me never want to buy anything online again!
I agree with most of the points that were made, but if she is a student, then I don't understand why the host insists on her moving out. I lived in dorms and got to go home on the weekends, but my last year I was living alone and I was STRUGGLING mentally and financially. Idk if they're trying to stop the enabling or what but otherwise it's needlessly hard.
You're right that moving out isn't a must if you're a student or because you're a specific age. I felt like Gail was pushing it because of the dynamic. Even if that's not the case I still agree with you
As a 24-year-old who’s currently living at home rent-free, I’m definitely a believer that it’s not inherently problematic. I work full-time and pay for all of my other expenses. Living with my parents is making it possible for me to save some money for the future instead of barely scraping by during a cost of living crisis, and I’m so beyond grateful for that.
I'm so glad that you're able to have this opportunity and definitely agree it's not inherently a problem. Also, this show was filmed over a decade ago. Nearly 15 years ago and the context with housing and cost of living now IS different.
As someone who has been contributing to the household financially since they were 15 I can say I agree with you. I feel like it set me back a ton and I'm already burnt out at 25 from working + never got to finish college going full time because the load was too much.
Also some of us are disabled. Like, am I supposed to move out into homelessness because I can't work just to not be seen as a failure for being at home while over 18?
It’s a wonderful thing to be able to have the opportunity to live with parents. Stay there as long as possible. The money you save will be worth it in the long run, trust me!
The issue, imo, isn't living with your parents. It's being UNGRATEFUL for it, not contributing in some way (doing chores or paying a small amount of rent). That's more the issue.
Her mother isn’t just an enabler, she is quite literally the Creator of this problem and its nurturer.
Very much this! I think the dad could have done with speaking up and encouraging his wife to encourage her daughter more.
@@RoseDoesIt With the mom's attitude, the dad probably knows better than to speak up and cause a conflict. With how frustrated he is, I bet he tried in the past and learned that it was futile.
I live at home and don't pay rent. I DO however help with chores, cooking, buying groceries, and helping my mom generally get errands done because i work in the locality of the big shopping center.
Also, my mom started us on money management and budgeting and spending tracking early. We tracked our savings accounts and our cash in and out of our wallets growing up, so we got that financial prep from a different angle.
I definitely think that you can live with your parents and still be an independent adult if that makes sense? I know people who still live with their parents but pay their own bills, buy their own food, help cook and clean, and do their own laundry and such. I think there’s a difference between essentially being a roommate with your parents and being an adult child.
@@JackyDomashinski That's how it is for me. I live with my mother and grandma, but I pay rent, pay a share of the utilities, buy all my own groceries, and clean up after myself.
Yes! It's what i do! I live with my mum because my teaching salary and her rent are low, but together we can afford a comfy life ^^
It really depends. I was doing about half the house work while living with my parents, the problem wasn't of I was doing my own laundry, it was my parents keeping me small. So it's definitely possible if you have parents who are able to see you as an independent adult. Both sides need to be able to have adult dynamics with the other.
My take on Gail's point isn't that an adult child couldn't be independent and live at home, it's that that would probably not happen in that specific dynamic.
I’m so here for this content. Seeing actual examples of people overconsuming and getting massively into debt is a wake up call for me that I could end up in that kind of debt if I don’t change my habits. Watching your channel is slowly changing my mindset on my finances and spending.
I'm so proud of you!!
hard agree, at first i used to think "pfft well at least im not that bad!" but the more i watch im like "dear god, that could be me, i need to change ASAP". this channel has helped change so many of my thought processes.
rachel's parents definitely enabled her by not setting boundaries with her financially, but also by not trusting her to do things on her own. good on gail for requiring that in four weeks the goals will be met, instead of the timeline of a year plus that the mom set. that felt like how long the *mom* needed to let go of rachel. if the mom had her way, rachel would be living in their home forever, dependent on her for everything.
the way i see it, the mom does not want to let go of parenting/taking care of rachel, which is setting her back developmentally and socially. i predict a low- to no-contact relationship in the future for the mom, because she truly believes the daughter needs her to survive. it really is too bad she can't see her daughter's potential; parents can have the best intentions, but their actions have consequences. rachel did amazing in this, i'm so proud of her getting the $5k at the end! on that, gail is wayyyy more supportive than rachel's mom is, which makes me think she hasn't had the same reaction/support from her mom. no reaction from the mom to her success worries me, because it seems like the mom wants to cut her off completely if she can't have that control of rachel's care. the "she'll go to you for debt repayment" comment felt so mean, it makes me wonder if the mom will ever acknowledge the success of rachel.
your analysis of the relationships in this and how all that affects the finances was well-informed and articulate, i really enjoy these episodes! 💖
I think you're on to something with this. The comment about the she'll go to you when she get's into debt again felt really off. Same with her saying the show was a bad experience and the mom didn't acknowledge the success or encourage her basically at all!
@@shawnaripariexactly. The umbilical cord has not been cut and this is what’s causing the problems. By taking away the responsibility from Rachel her mom stood in the way of learning. From how Rachel handled the tasks it becomes obvious that she is ready to live on her own and should not wait for her mom’s approval. Otherwise, she may never get it. Some moms are like that, overly worried and protective of their children, even when they are not anymore.
I was very enmeshed with my mom and she would have had this type of attitude if someone else had told her she was holding me back.
She never told me I couldn't do things but I have anxiety and she'd consistently 'save me' by doing for me (like phone calls etc) and made it like that was her being a good mom instead of offering me tools to learn how to do things myself. That way she never told me I wasn't going to make it, but by accepting her help in times of panic/anxiety, I always felt like a failure who couldn't make it on my own.
Moving out and starting therapy was the only thing that helped me. Distance, independence and boundaries were the way.
thank you so much for sharing your perspective 💕I'm so sorry you experience this
@shawnaripari thanks so much, and I'm doing really well, years later. Love this type of content!
oh god im you but younger. ill hopefuly be moving out early next year at the latest and tear myself out of this spiral. i hope i can get better at being a human being
@fr4nkensk4nk You will! Took me a while to figure how to even learn what my identity is, but it happens and it's great! It's difficult to not have the relationship you thought you had with your parent(s) but having a real relationship with yourself is amazing! Good luck, you've got this!
@@fr4nkensk4nkYou got this! I‘ve also been there, especially the being enabled and coddled in my dysfunctional anxious patterns.
If I may give a suggestion for something that helped me and doesn‘t require moving out or therapy (though I suggest it ofc):
Delay. Start small, something triggers your anxiety, see if you can just wait and sit with it for a couple of minutes before you share it with someone else. I learned that not only would experiencing anxiety not kill me (it‘s a shit feeling though), I could eventually even guide myself out of it. The confidence this brings is incredible. Whatever I can do, you can do as well. All the best!
I also agree with Gail, the mother is the main issue. She is using her child as an emotional crutch and I hope the daughter will be able to separate herself!
Gail also had a show called "Money Moron" for the "princess"-type men.
Omg love the marketing to both genders 😂
I was totally wondering where the men were. Lol. I have seen some doosies of financial missteps from guys. The terms Princess and Moron probably make the shows more memorable for marketing
She mentioned this at the beginning of the video where she was picking between the two shows
Wow, poor Rachael. I hope she managed to escape Mummy Dearest. I expect the overspending was kind of a rebellion against the parents. And her expectations for the place she would live probably came from MD too - "you can't move out until you can get a huge palace". It was great to see how excited she was to move out and how she rose to the challenges.
I was thinking the same. Like, in what generation have adult children moved to a home of the same standards as their parents? Even in mine (GenX, young adults during the tech boom), the vast majority of us didn’t do that. My parents, grandparents, great-grandparents (Victorians) didn’t. And I am quite sure her parents didn’t either.
I am so here for Ms. Gail. I mean you too Shawna, just love Ms. Gail so far.
I think Rachel just has "learned helplessness" because of some of the mother-daughter dynamics. Good on her for succeeding.
I saw something the other day and obviously not every parent can do this but;
Parents charged their adult kid rent while living with them but put it in savings. Gave it back to the adult child when they moved out as a deposit for their first house. Now obviously some parents actually need their adult child to contribute to rent but I thought that was such a great idea for parents that don't.
That is such a gold standard, grade A, real friend. Hell yeah.
Do the kids know or is it a surprise?
@marlyd the one post I saw the parents did it as a surprise. Personally I think the surprise is better but could be improved with doing a trust vs just a savings account. With terms like "can be used for first home", "used for college payments" but that would have to be parents collect rent and add it to what they're paying for college. Which I see as a plus because student loan rates are predatory as hell. I vote for honesty in where the money goes in that case like: "hey the money we save on having you pay your portion of the rent goes to paying for your college" type of thing. I don't have a 'logical' reason for that. I just feel like young adults whose parents are able to do something like this, would really appreciate it. And they would still be learning important financial knowledge about budgeting for rent and living expenses. Without, hopefully, the burden of student loans.
There are a lot of cultures around the world where families live in multi generational households and enjoy living with each other all of their lives. They certainly don't do this with adult children taking like they are infants. It's part of being an adult to see the value in relationships where there is reciprocity. It gives respect to everyone in the relationship and equal footing. For Rachel's own benefit she needs develop this way. Her mother's "bad" influence is just sad. The poor women probably feels like she will be discarded completely from her daughter's life if she doesn't bribe her.
My god Shawna I’ve been binge watching your videos for the last couple of weeks and you’ve made me think so much more critically about my purchases. I’ve been able to go “ooh this is cute but I don’t need it” to so many things I might’ve impulse purchased before. I’m so proud of myself. So thank you from this ADHD recovering impulse spender.
Happy you are learning it while you are young. I didn't have these kind of videos when I was young but was taught how to balance a checkbook, so good and bad. Overall good because housing was not like it is.
I'm so proud of you!! You're dong some great work
Oh hi my ADHD friend! Impulsive spending is really tough to deal with, but it seems like you‘re on a great path.
One way in which my ADHD is working for me in terms of spending is that I usually add stuff to my cart, get distracted, and then end up forgetting about it. So getting myself to get stuff out of sight will often also help get it out of mind. Maybe that works for you as well!
as an american who never grew up with these shows, i haven't stopped watching since the episode you posted of till debt do us part, ive been marathoning the episodes LMAO i love it
Ooh where are you watching them? Hi from Slovenia, never heard about these shows before. They‘re interesting and motivating as is, but the cultural differences also fascinate me.
(keeping in mind that they‘re not recent ofc)
@@sarapocorn theyre on youtube!
I love when you do videos like this! In my opinion, you can cut out shopping. You can budget as best as you want but the best thing that helped me get out of debt was honestly finding a hobby. It filled my time instead of shopping.
Please consider doing professional closed captions either yourself or through a service like Rev so the Deaf audience (including myself) can have full access to your wonderful content! Especially if there's outside audio like a TV show, the captions will be missing entirely most of the time and there's no indication of who is saying what. Thanks!
I remember seeing this episode and found the mother so infuriating. Like almost sabotaging Rachel because she doesn’t want her hold to be broken.
I lived on campus for first year university and I vowed I'd never live at home again; I know some people can live at home and be adults but my parents would never be able to handle that. My mom didn't let me have my debit card until I moved out, I was earning my own money in highschool but I had to ask permission to withdraw any money ever. It really set me up for failure because I went from not being allowed to make my own choices ever to having complete freedom and I wasted a lot of money those first few years. But the ability to set my own bedtime, decide my own schedule and priorities, even just the privilege to get a snack from the fridge without asking permission, I could never go back. My mom criticized me spending any money on anything, to the point where I felt guilty buying bare necessities; to free myself from that, I developed the equally unhealthy numbness to all spending, and it has taken me years to calibrate what a realistic "yikes that's too much" price is on any given item. I can't say "if it's not free it's too expensive" and "nothing is too expensive" are equally damaging mindsets, but neither of them are healthy in the long term.
Fun times! I always liked Gail. It's interesting to think what a different show it would be today re outlining the cost of living.
i wouldn't want to jump to any conclusions about people who were portrayed in 1 episode of a show, but rachel's experience resonates wildly with my own of abuse and i really hope that she's gotten therapy as well for that. all signs, to me, point to that rachel's mom only kept her around so that she could put rachel down and boost herself up by enabling careless behavior and blaming her for choosing to do it (gaslighting 101). really shitty dynamic! i'm glad that she got to at least see what's on the other side, because i feel like that's all you need to recognize the problematic dynamics and have a motivation to move forward
yay a new Shawna video. A FREE way to spend 40 minutes on UA-cam.
I think paying rent to live with your parents is also mostly a cultural thing
Like in my country if you tell someone that you make your child pay rent they'll first think you're joking then talk shit about you to everyone behind your back when they realise you're not
One way to do it is to charge them rent, but save it and give it back to the kid when they're ready to buy their own house. Just a way to teach them some financial responsibility.
Yes!!! If my dad asked me for rent I would be devastated and assume he doesn't love me. It's just not done IF the family owns the house (very different if they're renting, in that case it makes sense for the adults to split rent).
@@anazuleta3079 what if they're still paying their mortgage?
Definitely agree with you. I don't think it's always appropriate, welcome, or effective
@@marlyd I would assume it varies from family to family, I have only heard of the adult children contributing to it if there's financial hardship, but that might be because of my social bubble. One of the problems that surges then is that it makes one or more of the children to have more of a claim to the house after the parents die and it gets messy.
Like, here the elderly don't go to homes unless they've been abandoned or have very high needs, so there's the understanding that parents don't charge you rent because you'll be taking care of them later.
I'm 26. My ex was financially abusive, and I'm digging myself out of almost 40k in debt. It's insanely hard. I'm back to living with my parents, after having my own home and mortgage, in dealing with the debt and divorce.
Idk where I'm going with this.
Debt sucks.
I am so sorry that you experience this. Please know that I'm rooting for you!! 💕
Please do more of these or debt does us part as American did not grow up with it but love it. Also love seeing the time frame and imagine it today.
I really liked how encouraging it was to see someone change and become independent with guidance. Went back and watched your Til Debt Do Us Part video too!
I would love to see a where are they now show. Also it's so easy to buy stuff to forget what's going on on the world at the moment so thank you for being the voice of reason and I love the hair. Sending love from 🇬🇧
My relationship with my mother is similar to Rachel. Only except my mother wants control and intentionally set me up for failure in A LOT of areas. I am very blessed to live on my own and pay my own bills, im finally free! Would never have it any other way.
I am not the biggest commenter on YT but you are glowing in this video, the hair, makeup and style feels more authentic and suits you! xx
I LOVE Gail Vaz Oxlade. I totally got into her books during my divorce. Her advice help me pay off so much debt.
I am so grateful that I have parents that are able to support me while I’m in school. Additionally, my brother still lives at home despite having a good paying full time job. But this is because he is actively saving (properly, has a financial advisor, and doesn’t spend his money loosely.
My parents are ready to watch their children, who they love, leave and see as they continue to grow as an adult. Getting a home, partner and children (if we want) have the career we want. They want us to be able to save more money than we could if we had rent to cover as well. That is not what this mom is doing. She WANTS to watch her daughter not be able to grow into her full potential. And I think that is so sad. Raising a child should be rooted in success for the child, showing them the way of “adult” life. Why raise her for 25 years only to keep her in the same position as a high schooler.
If you are reading this, thank you for going down the jumble of thoughts typed out in a state of frustration and disappointment.
the things i would do for a $700/month basement suite that nice in Vancouver....girl did not know what was coming in a decade 😭😭 great video, love this series from you !
Can you even get a place for less than $2000 a month in Vancouver anymore?
@@AceCarmichael i am restricted to pet friendly so in the last year of searching the lowest ive seen that would allow my dog and cat is 1800, oftentimes with no oven tho :D avg of 350 sqft lmfao
I have young 3 kids. I fully believe in teaching responsibility. I would have a hard time taking rent from my child (as an adult) however I like the idea of charging rent and secretly putting it into a savings account for them when they do move out on their own. I can’t force them to save but once the money is “mine” I can choose to do whatever feels right with it.
As a teacher I‘d say that responsibility is one of the most important things to teach a child. It is the foundation of independence and self-esteem in my opinion.
It also allows you to be around the people you like, rather than the people you need.
I live in the UK and have watched all the till debt do us part and princess episodes on UA-cam! I love them both. Gail is brilliant. I do recall seeing a guy as the ‘princess’ in one of the princess episodes
I was so glad to glad to see this on my timeline. Thank you!
That mom made me super angry. Having seen that co-dependency before (me, my own mother!), I've had times where it's gotten to the point where I've had to yell at her. I can be around her now, and it's completely different.
Mom doesn't want her baby to struggle but struggle builds character.
no one wants to struggle but its apart of life. a parent raises you and teaches you morals so when you grow up you know how to handle yourself when you do struggle. my parents help me out by hearing me out and being a sounding board but they arent going to pay away my bills and coddle me. right now theyre helping me out and im forever grateful
I was lucky to buy my home when I was 25. Like Rachel I was lucky enough to be living at home without paying rent. The difference being saw it as HUGE opportunity to save as much money as possible so could save for a deposit and move out as soon as I could. The deal I had was I had to be saving more money than I would’ve been paying on rent elsewhere to be able to live at home.
I love this for you!
My daughter and her girl friend moved back home a couple of years ago to save money so they can go and live and travel overseas. They did, however, contribute to food shopping and did a lot of the cooking and cleaning. They both worked full time. They are now living overseas and travelling around Europe. I miss her like crazy but she needed to this thing for herself because she stayed home for longer than the average New Zealand kid because she had anorexia for 6 years and there is not a lot of help for that, here. But as soon as she was able she was out flatting, working full time and learning to manage on her own.
I agree that there can be circumstances when adult children can live at their parents home without paying rent, but I think that is mostly successful if there is a plan from the beginning for how long or for what circumstances this will keep going.
I moved out at 16, but have used my parents home as a stopgap place to land between moves between different cities and so on. My sister and her family stayed with my parents too, waiting for their home to close.
I think people who have parents who can support their children this way are very fortunate because they have a safety net others lack.
@@anpe4970 I'm a 29-year-old woman who lives with dad and stepmom, but it's very much normal in my culture to stay at home (even for married children) because houses are built to be for multiple families and rents are crazy high. Even then, I have my own space I'm responsible for, I cook and clean for myself and my pets, and pay for my own things. We basically are housemates that eat together on weekends lol
@anazuleta3079 I agree that if you live with your parents as an adult can very much be a cultural thing - in Scandinavia, where I am from, it is not very common because our societies value induvidualism a lot.
However, I think it will only benefit everyone if the parents and adult children are able to diasconnect from the parent/child role and create the more "roommate" dynamic you spoke about.
I think why the situation in this episode was not a successful one, was because the mother was not willing to allow the child to become an adult while living at home. By undermining her independence the mother created a situation where she was hindering her child rather than helping her.
Where can I see these episodes? I am in a shopping addiction group and one person suggested your channel and here for it!
What’s the group? Because I am struggling and that’s also why I am here lol
Shawna i loooved this video. Please do more of these! I’ll watch some more episodes rn but your commentary really adds so much…💖
I'm 37, and have been disabled since 93. The fact that I can't work a traditional job long term never stops people from looking down their noses and calling me lazy.
And then, I see women like this. Excuse me, I need to go practice my firebending...🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Edit: Ah, narc mom, that makes sense. Off to do more firebending, but for different reasons.
People who judge someone‘s worth by their contribution to the economy are so wack man
I lived at home with my parents until I was 23. They charged me $250 a month rent once I had a full time job for a month. They were living paycheck to paycheck, so it definitely helped with the grocery shopping. My mom also would buy me whatever I wanted when she went shopping (I didn’t ask for a lot and it was always reasonable.) and then she would help with my laundry when I was a little too busy. In a case like mine was, I totally get it. And I agreed with my parents that $250 was a reasonable amount.
Gail Vaz-Oxlade is a Queen, when I heard her voice it all came back to me . Thank you from a fellow Canadian :) .
That movie theater gift card at the end was so random. “Here’s a check for $5K….and also here’s a $100 movie voucher” did I miss something
I love Gail. Delightful Canadienne with strong Jamaican auntie energy! ❤
Gail is the OG! Love all her money awareness shows from like 10 years ago
I would love a little series of you reacting to these episodes! I think your insight as someone who's been in a similar situation adds an extra layer of depth and understanding missing from just the original show
I hope you continue this reaction content. It’s some of my new favorite from you ❤ I think there are a lot of complex dynamics going on here and I wish her all the best.
I feel for Rachel so much. Her parents are holding her back! I really hope that the four weeks of freedom encourages Rachel to move out!
As someone who grew up with not a lot, I got into the bad habit of putting enjoying life before saving money when I had my own income. I always worked and paid my own bills, but always lived pay check to pay check cos I would put spending over saving. It took me years to change my habits and learn to save. I’m in my late twenties now and actually starting to have my own savings. Watching your videos helps keep me on track so thank you 💕
Gail is the GOAT!! love love love her
Imagine your parent holding you back that bad.
The mom appears uncomfortable about the prospect of it being just her and her husband in their home together. I’m curious about what drives the mom daughter dynamic.
I heard a really great suggestions that I think is a great compromise. Where the parents collect "rent", but then the parents also put that "rent money" aside to give back to the child when they move out. Could be for a security deposit, a down payment, whatever it may be. The rent essentially becomes savings.
My parents didn't charge rent but when we started working 16 at least 50% had to go into savings. After 18 we took over our own car insurance, gas, personal needs etc.
I really didn’t appreciate the house I grew up in until I went shopping for my own house
I've been hearing for years that i am unable to live without my mom. Well, here i am- living in another country, with amazing husband, two kids and job. I'm speaking 3 languages, i work in foreign language.❤
Never believe people who say: you're unable to do something.
You make a really good point. My sister was given my mom's old car (at least one of them) while I have had to buy any vehicles I've ever owned.
She tricked my mom into co-signing for her student loans, which she now refuses to pay. I've had to pay for all of my schooling on my own.
She believes my parents (and the world) owe her everything; I don't.
My cousin stayed with parents in their house and put almost all the money for a down-payment. Now he has a mortgage and never had to rent.
This is incredible
I used to love this show so much!!! So nostalgic. Thank you for these videos ❤
On the off chance Shawna sees this comment - First: love your content. Second: love the new hair.
Now... my shopping habit was never too crazy. I'm not easily influenced and i know the difference between want and need. *however* i am guilty of occasional small spending sprees (less than $200) on makeup, shoes and my many creative hobbies. But in September of this year i found out i needed a surgery that was going to cost me several thousand dollars and i needed it as quickly as possible. I was forced into a No-Buy in order to save this money. There were weeks i spent less than $20 on my debit card. Every meal i had at work was leftovers from home. Honestly, It sucked sometimes. It took me 12 weeks but i did it and my surgery is scheduled soon... i could not have done it without you and your videos! And i could fill a book with everything I've learned about myself in the last 3 months... i cannot tell you thank you enough
❤❤❤ and my ongoing spending habits have been changed forever
(Looking forward to actually having a savings account in the new year)
Congratulations, well done and all the best for your surgery!
(not to get too political, but I wish you wouldn‘t have to pay thousands out of pocket. It‘s not like you‘re having the procedure for fun)
This show is so a 10000% US/Canada-coded, never related less to ANYTHING. The way they are all acting like she's a failure and super entitled because she lives at home and doesn't want to pay rent AT HER PARENTS PLACE at 24, I'm flabbergasted honestly. Like not saying she doesn't have bad financial habits and all that but WHAT?
I think rent is rational based on Gail’s argument but if you as a parents have the means to not need your child to pay rent it’s not unreasonable to set the “rent” aside for the adult child for later in life. Either to help them with a home in the future or further graduation or wedding gift or help them with moving expenses eventually.
Love these reactions!
As someone who has lived the last 10 years in a basement apartment, it really starts to grind you down and honestly I'm kinda starting to think they shouldn't be allowed.
I’m 26 years old, have my apartment. Two jobs, have small debt I’m trying to pay off and starting school again in spring or fall!
I love Til Debt Due Us Part and have started watching it again on UA-cam to keep myself on track!
I lived with my parents for a year and a half after I was out of college. Thankfully they did not make my pay rent. I worked 2 jobs, I put that money towards saving to move out and paying off my car that I had bought. Once I was able to do that I quit the second job and moved out on my own. Forever thankful for my parents to allow me to do that.
LOVE these reaction videos, keep them coming!
Oh I love these videos! Please do more!
😅I’ve watched all the Princess episodes I can find and the mom on this one was the absolute worst enabler.
I think taking rent from there own child depends of the situation. When my sister saved for a apartment they didn´t took anything from the money she made. My brother on the other hand doesn´t want to move out and gets more money on his job then our mom so he needs to pay rent. But even that is less then 1/3 what an apartment costs.
I think the issue of the car is so location based. In most places in the US and Canada, there is literally no public transport. No train, no bus, nothing. Combine that with endless suburbia and sprawling cities, and you have a recipe for an unwalkable hellscape only transversable by car. So the only solution you have is to use rideshaing apps (expensive) or to bum rides off of family and friends (unreliable and can be impossible.) Basically, I think it's impossible to judge whether or not it's really coddling/'over the top' for parents to help buy or outright buy their kid a car without a thorough examination of the other transport options in the area.
@@binarystar5901 I’m Canadian and have lived in Toronto too, never had a cad. Having a car is a luxury, for most people you don’t need it. while it’s not ideal it’s manageable.
@katiemarie3 oh, you live in one of the most populated areas in your country and don't need a car? Clearly that means NO ONE ELSE would need a car! Especially people balls fucking deep in suburbia or people stuck in rural places! Nope, the world revolves around you and you don't need a car, so no one does!! Congratulations!!!! 🎉🥳🥳🎊
DKM - that shot of her walking on the gardener 🤣🤣
I believe that all parents owe their children is unconditional love and support. That does not mean enabling and doing everything for them. They're not synonymous. There is a middle ground to being there to support without spoiling or punishing.
She got the expectation they would help her all the time from somewhere, her mum it seems. Also seems like dad doesn't know what's going on at all, and is uninterested.
This was great! Do more content like this
Great video. Enjoyed this alot and well done to the 25 year old.
I can listen to you all day 😭😭😭
Wait do i need a Shawna budget? 😂 1 video a day allowance
In the UK it's common for adult children staying at home to pay "Dig money" or "Digs": A contribution to the household that's usually much less than rent and bills and usually reasonable for the child's income. I think it's a good way to get them into the habit of not spending their whole salary on fun.
I was privileged enough to live at home until I turned 30, at which time I was able to buy my own house. During that time, I was able to pay off my car loan, pay off my student loans and save up for the down payment on my home. I didn't pay rent when I live with my parents but I did pay for my own things like vet bills, healthcare, gas and food. I was able to start contributing to a 401k because I worked full-time. You can make it work!
I just wanna say, the parents are being great at providing everything for their daughter. I'm sure they're caring and loving parents. perhaps she is the only kid and still see her as their baby. sure her mom enabler behaviour is not good. her father seems like a good man too. they're just not ready to let her go. and the daughter itself not showing any progress. also, how the heck bank can approve easily of her credit card application when she does not have full time job?? in my country, it's very hard to get one cc
Hi Shawna! You're cleaning with me today! Laundry first 😊
Really love this new series 🥰
Id love to see a follow up for today
I’m 23 and live at home. I do pay $500 in rent which my parents put towards the mortgage and groceries but I also pay all of my own bills. I think it’s really important that parents teach their kids the value of money but also how saving and using your money smartly will benefit them in the future. Kids can definitely have fun money but they should be putting away most of their money because compound interest is on their side and that saved money can go towards their first car, school, a home etc. It’s definitely weird how the mom reacted and would put Rachel down about not being able to do it on her own. Parents should want their kids to do well and be able to live without them hovering and micro managing
Great listening i think she did really great once she was temporarily on her own and i think she learned budgeting her finances much much better when she moves back home again
omg i forgot about this one thank you for this
This is 2012 money/ financial environment btw. I loved that show when it was on 😂. It boggles my mind seeing how people spend their money
Hello from Arizona.
Love these vids!
YAY NEW VIDEOOOO!!!!
Was that lady Caleb Hammers mom? LMAO
You can tell its over 10 year old show when she says se can just go and get a full time job.
Oooh that mama. I can’t imagine how it must feel to have a kiddo leave the nest but she’s not handling it well at all. I live in the US and haven’t seen this show but I’d agree she is the one with the poor attitude.
It's down to the individual most of all but it's also on the parents, my parents once I hit 18 were pretty clear on how it was, I could stay as long as I need but I need have a job, pay them rent and I need to have direction.
If I didn't have any one of the three I was hounded constantly, to the point that I made it unbearable to live there, if I did the three things they asked of me my parents left me alone, there's balance
Someone get that mum a dog or. A cat
I was 25k in debt(credit card) by 25, by 29 I have paid it all off. You can do it!!!
I am currently watching “Buy Now! The Shopping” conspiracy. I’m not sure if you have Netflix or access in Canada, but I’d love to see a reaction video on it. I knew a lot of the information in theory, but hearing people talk about things with examples, interviews, and footage. Horrifying. Makes me never want to buy anything online again!
Mom is the problem here. She has allowed the young lady to develop the entitlement mind set.
I agree with most of the points that were made, but if she is a student, then I don't understand why the host insists on her moving out. I lived in dorms and got to go home on the weekends, but my last year I was living alone and I was STRUGGLING mentally and financially. Idk if they're trying to stop the enabling or what but otherwise it's needlessly hard.
You're right that moving out isn't a must if you're a student or because you're a specific age. I felt like Gail was pushing it because of the dynamic. Even if that's not the case I still agree with you