Yes, you can be good, help everyone and still romance Astarion (Act 1) | Baldur's Gate 3

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  • Опубліковано 10 чер 2024
  • Do you want a vampire boyfriend but unsure if you have to sacrifice your morals for it? Fear not, for the answer is "no". Astarion may seem like one of the harder companions to please in a goody-two-shoes playthrough, but starting a romance with him is not that difficult.
    In this video we kick off the romance at the party after defending the Grove (at Medium approval), I am including all conversations with Astarion, as well as all approvals and disapprovals I got up to that point (he was in my party the whole time since I recruited him). This is not really a guide, just an example. There are many other choices you can make to get more approval/disapproval.
    General note: not all approvals weight the same, most "world" approvals are +1 or -1 while events personally related to Astarion can give extra +5/+10 points of approval.
    Biggest approval bumps in the video: +5 from picking how you want to be killed, +5 from saying you believe Astarion when he tries to bite you, +10 from letting him bite you, +5 from saying you'll keep each other safe when discussing Cazador, and +5 from doing the Loviatar trial. Normally, you get +5 points from defending him to the party morning after the bite, but it is currently bugged as of patch 3... however, you can see it wasn't really necessary.
    You can also follow a different dialogue chain at the Grove party* (I tested several & didn't have issues). I picked that one for the video since asking what he means by "fun" will get you a rejection in case you don't have enough approval. However, there is a specific chain that lets you romance him on Neutral approval as well. *Be aware that if you try propositioning him yourself you may get rejected unless your approval is pretty high. He must be the one who brings this idea up.
    Potential spoilers for Act 1, obviously.
    Chapters for your convenience:
    00:00 - Recruiting Astarion
    02:57 - He will keep watch (approval)
    03:52 - How do you want to die? (approval)
    05:17 - At the Grove (disapprovals)
    06:48 - Finding the boar
    08:00 - Stargazing
    09:25 - More Grove (approvals/disapprovals)
    11:22 - Using ilithid powers first time (disapproval)
    12:08 - Raphael (approvals)
    14:06 - Bite scene (approvals)
    17:26 - Morning after the bite (bugged approval)
    19:20 - Karlach & Wyll situation (approvals)
    20:28 - Whom would you bite? (approval)
    22:35 - Sunlit Wetlands/Putrid Bog (approvals)
    23:55 - About past, how one becomes a vampire, about biting
    26:26 - Gur encounter (disapproval)
    28:59 - Post-Gur conversation
    32:21 - Drunken bear talk
    34:24 - Back at the Grove (disapprovals)
    36:28 - Mirror scene (approval)
    38:20 - At Auntie Ethel's (disapprovals)
    40:08 - About Cazador (approval)
    41:59 - About Dream Visitor & tadpoles
    44:10 - Goblin Camp (approvals/disapproval)
    48:36 - Lakrissa's bet (approval)
    49:01 - Post-grove celebration
    50:10 - The end :D
  • Ігри

КОМЕНТАРІ • 271

  • @bonny-at-morn
    @bonny-at-morn 7 місяців тому +1762

    I was so surprised when people said they found this difficult. I was a bleeding heart goody two shoes my whole playthrough and his approval is exceptional and he and my character are basically married lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +322

      That is pretty much the reason for this video. I often see people getting advice to at least be rude or always ask for a reward if they want to romance Astarion, but even that is not necessary.

    • @cinder4181
      @cinder4181 7 місяців тому +88

      Yeah you just have to let loose once in a while and be a jerk to some people and he will approve.

    • @Ectava
      @Ectava 7 місяців тому +151

      The advice I always give is basically, "joke with him, say yes to the sex bite and agree to things occasionally that a cat would like. Also, give him the Necromancy book. His commentary on that is really funny xD
      The ONLY time I had trouble with him was when I tried to go the evil route. For some reason he really hates Minthara.... I guess paladins are all too serious and blaaaaah for a mischief maker.
      Since they haven't fixed Gale yet and Karlach doesn't have a decent ending at the moment, I pretty much always pick Astarion.
      Now, my husband can't romance him for shite and I did figure out why. He doesn't explore and do sidequests that often. He basically bolts through, acts all goody goody, and then tells me my advice is bad. Of course I don't want to hear it from someone who let Florrick die in the fire because, "fire bad." :p

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +47

      @@Ectava lol, letting Florrick die in the fire is not "goody goody". How could he??? :D Send your husband this video as a proof romancing Astarion is easy. And you're right, bite+aftermath if handled correctly give a 20 points boost (when morning approval isn't bugged), from there it is not difficult to build just a bit more.
      For RP reasons I keep the Necromancy book in the bag in Act 1 without anyone touching it, but yes, giving it to Astarion will give extra interactions with him at camp, as well as 5 extra approval points.

    • @Ectava
      @Ectava 7 місяців тому

      @@carianbandit Oh it's not goody goody, but he had NO idea what he had done. He just shrugged it off and assumed the poor NPCs put the flames out.
      I actually considered keeping the Necromancy book in the bag until I reached act 3 but there are so many bodies to talk to and it saves on scrolls to get that speak to the dead knowledge.
      Back to the fire. He saw me experimenting with different ways to free Florrick in Act 3 and asked me who she was. I just stared at him like he had four heads for a few minutes before explaining things. He then got irritated and said he had probably
      wrecked his whole game.
      .....and maybe he has actually.
      1. Most of the characters at his grove died during the battle with the goblins (including most of the kids).
      2. Halsin vanished. I suspect he bugged out so it didn't show his defeated leaving of the game.
      3. Arabella died to the snake
      4. He never exposed Kagha but....she died to a spider in the goblin raid
      5. His Wyll left after the battle with the goblins and at some point Karlach was beheaded.
      6. Florrick died in a fire.
      I know that doesn't sound goody goody, but he does always pick the moral choices. But he skips soooooo much!
      The playthrough I'm doing atm, my girl went down on a goblin's foot and she swiped his toe ring (which Astarion loved apparently lol). My hubby just....he was dumbfounded. He never even spoke to the goblins outside the camp x_x

  • @jules4919
    @jules4919 7 місяців тому +706

    Astarion called me a goody-goody and I still managed to get exceptional approval, you just have to make your character sarcastic

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +322

      Good playthrough Astarion be like: oh, you're naive about the ways of the world, have a big heart blah blah. Him a bit later - well, jokes on you, I am into that.

    • @elenalizabeth
      @elenalizabeth 7 місяців тому +129

      Apparently the trick is to act like a cat 😂 so be cute and innocent looking most of the time, but then occasionally go crazy knocking over everything just because you can 😂

    • @SkycometFallen
      @SkycometFallen 29 днів тому +1

      @@carianbandithe really is into that. He prefers innocent people (hence why he liked Sebastian so much)

  • @frogguchi
    @frogguchi 7 місяців тому +389

    my paladin: legit helping absolutely anyone, always nice, never asks for reward(zevlor tried to give him money and my guy just went "nah its cool" and refused it)
    astarion: is this the love of my life?

    • @chubchubcherub9183
      @chubchubcherub9183 22 дні тому

      How are you all getting this? How

    • @frogguchi
      @frogguchi 22 дні тому

      @@chubchubcherub9183 let him bite you enthusiastically the first time he asks and give him the creepy book, that's legit all you need (alternatively, if you don't want to give him the book, let him kill gandrel, the gur in ethel's swamp, but that's kinda evil so i tend to favor the book over hurting gandrel.)

  • @TF2CrunchyFrog
    @TF2CrunchyFrog 7 місяців тому +708

    I've seen a lot of Astarion-haters who positively brag how they "always kill Astarion" in every playthrough the moment they meet him "because he is evil".[1] And then they usually add they'll be taking Astarion as companion for their "evil run".
    But that means they are reducing Astarion to exactly the thing he _doesn't_ want to be seen as or be: a monster.
    Astarion says it several times: He simply wants to survive. And up to now, he had never experienced kindness from anyone in his life, so he can't imagine anyone helping him without ulterior motives. Even when we do help him he thinks he needs to repay us with sex so we won't leave him behind, because his body is all he has left and he's so used to being used for sex and nothing but. In Act 1, both Astarion and Gale desperately try to convince us that they're powerful and thus _useful_ and we should keep them around for that reason... hence why Astarion fears being seen as "weak" or showing vulnerability we might exploit. Astarion and Gale both seek more power because both have low self-esteem hidden behind a facade of sarcastic flamboyancy (Astarion) and bragging about his intellectual prowess and magic talent (Gale); they need to learn that they have worth beyond their skills.
    [1] (So their character kills a random stranger who was calling for help? Wow, what a hero! /sarcasm
    But even if they wait until Astairon pulls his knife to threaten Tav, he does it for the same reason Lae'zel threatened to kill us with her sword on the Nautiloid when we first met her: Because both Lae'zel and Astarion saw us walking about on the ship and mistakenly but sensibly assumed we were a thrall of the Mindflayers! But you never see anyone bitching about Lae'zel! What hypocrisy.)

    • @itwasntriggedyourejustaloser73
      @itwasntriggedyourejustaloser73 7 місяців тому +18

      Here here! There's a reason why he is the way he is, and I can save him ❤❤❤😊😊😊❤❤❤

    • @primrosett
      @primrosett 7 місяців тому +62

      people who hate on him for pulling a knife on Tav when they literally JUST met and he thought they were a thrall are so boring lol, like cmon, where's your sense of whimsy? how can you not see the delicious irony in two people who met via knife-drawn interrogation falling in love later??
      I made it through that scene without him ever using the dagger on my Tav and when I found out he could interrogate me with a dagger to my throat, I reloaded so I could make that part of my canon 💀💀

    • @Slothgreedenvy
      @Slothgreedenvy 7 місяців тому +12

      I agree, he wants to survive, he's not a evil man. Just hurt and wants to live. ❤

    • @sanmononoke5419
      @sanmononoke5419 6 місяців тому +2

      I bitch about lae'zel. All the time. I don't usually actively hate characters, but I hate her. I recruited her just in case I need her, but as far as I'm concerned she can stay in camp the whole game. I also knew as soon as I met Astarion I was going to romance him. He's so interesting!! What an amazing story!

    • @rubyrootless7324
      @rubyrootless7324 6 місяців тому +9

      "you never see anyone bitching about lae'zel"
      Isn't she like literally the most actively disliked companion tho? lmao
      I rarely read anything positive about her and my friends are constantly hating on her and killing her on sight

  • @TricksterModeEngaged
    @TricksterModeEngaged 7 місяців тому +675

    people talk about Astarion being hard to impress if you don't RP as a bad person, but if you just remember his motivations for why he's so prickly and take relatively harmless options he'll think are funny every so often you can still play at least by neutral or chaotic good rules and still have Astarion warm up to you easily (and the disapprovals you get for doing good stuff are usually more than evened out by being kind to him when you get the chance)

    • @katiatall
      @katiatall 7 місяців тому +50

      Chaotic good it’s perfect fit. My durge drow got really fast a lot of approve.
      It was a discovery to me that the evil passage, there is not so much approval as it seems. and how the company behaves, everything is different. Astarion with such Tav feels bad and insecure, and he knows it, there are other lines he has, and he behaves more carefully and closed with evil tav. Romance feels different. Sad and empty.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +116

      Indeed, being good works well enough, the disapprovals are a drop in the ocean as long as you're generally supportive of him. Given some lines he has about Wyll I guess Astarion kind of digs the righteousness, he is just understandably very jaded himself.

    • @katiatall
      @katiatall 7 місяців тому +31

      @@carianbandit he was 200 hundred years on dark and pure shit , and one of the sudden, he got everything, free, sun, blood, power, team, friends, a lot of new things. I even could t imagine. Of course he is overexcited by all this. And Astarion has lines even about this, if you ask him about 7,000 vampires, he’ll say he understands how hard it is to make good decisions when things are coming to you and that they need support and leader.
      Sometimes one week I just sit at home and go out somewhere, and shocked , like an alien. Hence and such behavior, 200 years!!!! I think he’s still responding calmly. 200 years of not seeing peace, light, not having family, friends. Gale’s story is the same, he has no one but a cat. Karlach’s story seems to be 10 years in hell with nothing. Shadowheart trained to torture people for 40 years. Durge is the same, nothing and no one except murders. So they are a really crazy group of weirdos. 😂

    • @FlowerSong606
      @FlowerSong606 7 місяців тому +9

      Yeah he is all about playing with the dialog options lol sometimes something that would make him disagree turns into approval if you compromise 🤣 like with mayrina he disapproves if u pick her over the power but if u intimidate or persuade ethal to give you both he approves
      He disapproves of you helping others but if u are like ill do it for money he won't care 😂😂 this like my 5th started campaign and I managed to get him to 100 approval on act 1 by being nice
      I did kill khaga mostly cuz I've never picked to kill her and I wanted to see what would happen if I did lol
      Though I'm also a dark urge

    • @katiatall
      @katiatall 7 місяців тому +9

      @@FlowerSong606 yeah, I had similar run, with chaotic drow durge, and is to easy to get high approval with him, same as Shadowheart,
      Point is that we have to get, like, 30 approvals before a camp party to start romance, and we can all give up on those approval points after, and the relationship goes on, and they will be different depending on the decisions, not the icons approve and disprove.
      I played super hero good paladin savior of all innocent- and all my companions approval level was 80-100 at the middle of act 2. I think people overestimate these approval scale

  • @pLanetstarBerry
    @pLanetstarBerry 7 місяців тому +578

    Me, making my character: "you know what? This is my first playthrough. I'm just gonna play my boy the way I want. If I want pursue any romance, I'll just go with whoever I click with the most."
    Astarion, watching me be a chaotic little gremlin thats a sweetheart to innocents and a menace to villains: "this better not awaken anything in me."

    • @aceentity7703
      @aceentity7703 5 місяців тому +19

      Astarion starting to fall in love with Tav: haha I'm in danger
      😂

  • @VesperNoControle
    @VesperNoControle 7 місяців тому +150

    I find it so approppriate that one of the possible ways to romance Astarion (and, actually the easiest imo) is just... Being kind and treating him like an equal/his own person. Which is pretty much all he wanted his entire existence. Extra points if you are witty and don't let others step on you/take advantage too much, of course, because he absolutely wouldn't. The points you gain w/ him by simply doing that **FAR** outweight amount you lose when he feels when you are being "too nice" all the time, which is pretty telling about where his actual priorities are. It's just his trauma making him snappy when he feels that you are being too open/vulnerable/nice with others... Because, from his own experience, that's dangerous if you are trying to survive. Which is understandable.
    Just keep things steady until he starts digesting the idea that being "good" doesn't make you naive or have less control of your life and by act 3, depending on how you play your cards, he even starts being openly supportive of your selflessness and returning it in kind, even if he struggles to understand it at times.

    • @gareless
      @gareless 4 місяці тому +5

      Yes I was surprised during some choices where the romance guides mention ‘ he’ll approve if you betray this person’ and I was ready to take that L and just deal with it but I was pleasantly surprised when he instead approved of me NOT betraying x person!
      I’ve had two approvals from him for Doing ‘nice’ things and it makes me so happy hahaha it feels like I’m finally getting through to him ❤ I love this game

    • @juliabe408
      @juliabe408 3 місяці тому +8

      As my Tav loves animals and never misses a chance to talk to any of them on the way it was so funny and lovely when we found His Highness, a very proud sphynx cat, she complimented him twice and twice Astarion approved 😄

  • @rin590
    @rin590 7 місяців тому +199

    Oh, I'm playing for the Bard too, and damn it, the interaction of the bard and the rogue is just a nuclear mix. It was really amazing

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +67

      Bard has some of the funniest lines. And being charisma-based with strong deception & persuasion skills triggering inspiration points for a rogue with Charlatan background was the easiest out of everyone in the party.

    • @rin590
      @rin590 7 місяців тому +34

      ​​​@@carianbandit same, I was even surprised when I saw how much inspiration he had. I especially love the moment when in the goblin camp I distracted them by playing on stage, and he added poison to the drink.😂

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +29

      @@rin590 haha, pretty much the perfect team up when you are up to some mischief in a crowded area. We also may or may not have stolen things or gained entry to forbidden areas that way on multiple occasions.

    • @GabbyIsFine
      @GabbyIsFine 7 місяців тому +28

      Bard is such a good class for role-playing in this game, I always multiclass at least one level into it just to get the dialogue options. They are just chaotic. Sometimes they pacify the situation, sometimes they make everything worse by being a little shit. It's awesome.

    • @HobGungan
      @HobGungan 5 місяців тому

      I always respec Astarion AS a Bard...

  • @winterviveca5976
    @winterviveca5976 6 місяців тому +68

    I love the Gur encounter because I see a lot of people being so immersed in the game that even if they have a petting-bunnies-good playthrough, they often kill him purely out of fear he can hurt Astarion. I even did that during my first playthrough even though I always do everything to avoid violance if I can and I imagined my character being like "we just killed a man because we were scared. Because we let our vampre weirdo's paranoia affect us. Huh. What a development."

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  6 місяців тому +20

      Truly. I also did it in my first playthrough despite my first instinct being to actually spare him (though it did seem a bit suspicious a monster hunter would search help from a hag), but for a different reason. I just decided to Google if my decision to not kill him was going to backfire in some way as in the beginning I was struggling with the fights and wanted to avoid them as much as possible. I found a badly researched article (like many articles about this game these days) saying Gandrel attacks you later if you spare him, which was total bs. So I went back and killed him. 🤦‍♀️ I learned way too late that was a lie, and was pretty mad something like this made it to top results on Google. I felt so guilty haha.

    • @winterviveca5976
      @winterviveca5976 6 місяців тому +11

      @@carianbandit yes! I also found a lot of articles saying that the Gur is basically going to come to your camp, decapitate Astarion, kill everyone you love and piss on their graves lol. I also remember desperately trying to find some good approval guide because I was so paranoid that Astarion is going to leave my party if I don't kill at least one person in every location but it was actually super fun to see that it's not that he loves evil, he just loves chaos.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  6 місяців тому +8

      @@winterviveca5976 haha, same. When the game just came out my first Act 1 run & aiming to romance Astarion as a good character was a tad anxiety-inducing with all the bad and plain wrong information around (and it was already out for one month at the time since I had to wait for PS5 release, so one would think proper guides should have been made). I was pretty sure he was going to give me the "ewww" treatment at the party based on everything I read. But nope.

    • @Lunakitty1234
      @Lunakitty1234 5 місяців тому +2

      I can’t bring myself to be evil and let innocents die. But at the same time I’m always going to protect my party :)

  • @Flufferz626
    @Flufferz626 6 місяців тому +53

    I was a mostly goody-two shoes and had just leveled up my party and had finished Asterion's stats. When I went back to the game before switching the characters POV to someone else in my party, the Tiefling child pit pocket tried to steal from Asterion since I was still playing his character.
    The interaction was interesting, and oddly sweet in Asterion's own sassy way. He even gives the kid a couple of pointers too on how to be a better thief. I chose to pretend I didn't see anything lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  6 місяців тому +8

      Yes, it is a Rogue class interaction. (:

  • @GabrielBadwolf
    @GabrielBadwolf Місяць тому +5

    Neil said he based his performance of Astarion on a stray cat that comes by his house that took 3 years before it would allow him to pick it up. Put like that yea you can see it. Astarion is like a stray cat that just wants to be loved and affectionate but is too scared you have to be cautious but once you get his trust he’s very loving

  • @tarynghost
    @tarynghost 7 місяців тому +127

    I literally played a character who was in between. I chose things my girl would say and not for the sake of him. She was a "If I benefit more from deceit, I'll do it but if I benefit more from being truthful, so be it" kinda girl to get to where she wanted. Any means necessary. That led to a lot of goody, goody options and I saved a ton and set everyone free(as many as I could in several situations) and he still fell for my girl. He really is neither good or bad, just like Niel described him.
    It honestly annoys me to no end that everyone keeps saying you have to be an ahole to romance him. Even my best friend had that same thought and I'm like bruhh.. *Proceeds to tell him all about my character*. It's hard to change someone's opinion when all they see is one thing and then their mind is set, no changing it.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +35

      Yeah, I think some people also judge his character from the meta standpoint - we know that if you play evil he will support cruel choices. And from the game's perspective it would be weird if all companions left you in an evil run, so when it is narratively fitting some of them have approvals for both "good" or "evil" choices.
      The thing about Astarion is that he has not had any sense of self or security for two centuries, so being free now he can be influenced to follow either path - grow worse or better. He is jaded after all the suffering he's been through, and has a pre-existing opinion that evil sets the rules, and the player can either prove him right, that being evil is the way to get what you want, or show him that doing good actually feels nice, pays off and can make him happy too.

    • @nocturna76
      @nocturna76 7 місяців тому +14

      @@carianbandit i'd also like to add to that that he has dialogue where he tells you what happened when he tried to go against cazador & save 1 of his lovers. he literally spent 2 centuries being tortured even more horribly than usual for ever doing anything but evil, so of course that length of time with that sort of brainwashing isn't going to go away in just a few days, & that's what makes it even more amazing that you actually can change his way of thinking, essentially de-programming him, simply by believing in him & showing him that things can be different now that he's free

    • @juliabe408
      @juliabe408 3 місяці тому

      ​@@nocturna76 I've also got that dialog about him sparing the boy which showed me he's actually capable of doing good not when all are happy, but when there's a brutal price to pay, which for me speaks lots, as I was almost convinced in the beginning, that okay, my Tav has just fallen for a total narcissist, let's see how badly it will end. It's really a miracle he's not all that despite the things he says and things he went through. Once the party passed by a graveyard, I think, and there was a chat on the way between Astarion and Gale, where Gale asked him about going spiritual and Astarion answered "I prayed to all of them. No one has answered" And in this rare moment of his openess and vulnarability (gosh, these moments just make me feel different about him any time!) I was just "My, I understand so much why you say meanacing things and want all the possible power in the world to rule it or be invincible. Who wouldn't when the world is either cruel to you or doesn't give a sh*t about you?" I'm so happy this dialog showed up, it's so important for understanding his character I think (at least, it was for me) and it made me and my Tav confident in choosing him and standing by his side all the time.

  • @katiatall
    @katiatall 7 місяців тому +140

    Of course we can, my paladin with lightning armor and sword saviour of all innocent has 80 approval at the end of first act. And even rejected him with 40 approvals because there was such an obvious manipulative lines, and his reaction is priceless - “no? After everything you sad, all right” 😂😂

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +28

      80 by the end of Act 1 is quite a lot, didn't know it was possible while sparing the hunter. I had his approval at "High" by then, not sure about the score since I can't see it on PS5.

    • @katiatall
      @katiatall 7 місяців тому +30

      @@carianbandit give him blood, fun and flirt, and still keep doing what you doing - good heroic staff)))
      It’s just that if I play games, I take out all the quests, I go everywhere on the map, and the first act is pretty big, he approves of a lot of things at Underdark, he does a lot of approve when we don’t go easy on the bad guys.

    • @sabsain2399
      @sabsain2399 3 місяці тому

      How did you reject him and still romance him afterwards?

  • @MissRedZelda
    @MissRedZelda Місяць тому +6

    Me: is an all out goody two shoes Light/Life domaine human cleric who helps everyone, plays the hero, gives to the poor, preaches about Selune whenever she can, generally annoys Astarion with her by the book selflessness.
    Astarion: (by Act 2) is this the love of my life?

  • @pinkdruid2347
    @pinkdruid2347 6 місяців тому +46

    THANK YOU!!!! I just had a semi-argument with someone about this.
    (spoiler warning)
    Imo, the game is purposely deceptive, just like Astarion himself. Astarion may seem evil, especially when you first meet him. He seems to like violence and he often disapproves when you help people. But imo, there's a lot more to Astarion than that. While I can't say that Astarion is a good person, I wouldn't call him evil either. In my opinion, Astarion is a multi-layered morally grey character done in a very creative way in which YOU as the player ultimately get to decide which path he goes down. He may never truly be a good guy, but he can become a much better person with your help, just as much as he can become a villain with your help. Ultimately, I think Astarion is neutral, but YOU are the one who gets to decide whether he will be "good" or evil in the end.
    Yes, it's true that he tends to lean a little more evil because when you first meet Astarion he doesn't trust anyone. All he's known for hundreds of years is abuse under Cazador. I feel like anyone who was abused for that long would probably have some major trust issues, and also might develop a pretty cynical view of humanity. I think that Astarion kinda has the "die a hero or survive long enough to become a villain" mindset. He sees most people as a threat and he believes that the only way to survive is to become threatening himself. He hopes to take Cazador's place because he wants to escape the abuse he's had to suffer for a long time. While trauma doesn't justify being cruel, I still think it's important to realize where Astarion is coming from. I don't think he enjoys hurting people even if it sometimes may seem like he does and I think that's what stops him from being TRULY evil. Honestly, Astarion reminds me A LOT of Loki, especially in the Loki TV series.
    "I don't like hurting people. I do it because I have to...because I've had to. Because it's part of the illusion. It's the cruel elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear"
    "A desperate plea for control. You do know yourself"
    "A villain"
    "I don't see you that way".
    That's Astarion.
    Literally one of the first lines in the game about him is that he is fearful. When your worm connects with his, one of the things you experience is his fear. Astarion is simply desperate for control because he feels that's the only way to rise above those who want to hurt him and make him feel weak and powerless. But deep down he knows he's just scared and lashing out. He doesn't like being a villain. He wants to be a better person than Cazador was, and you CAN help him to become that better person if you're patient with him and you're kind to him. I do get why some people may be pissed when even at the end of the game he's not a full on goody-two-shoes. But to that, I say this: Have you considered you are only seeing the beginning of Astarion's redemption arc and not the end? He may not be an entirely good person by the end of the game, but who's to say he won't continue to improve with time?
    To me, just saying Astarion is evil and killing him off early or refusing to have him in your party feels a little bit like you just don't get his character. If you genuinely dislike him that's valid. If you're a very no nonsense person who can't tolerate someone like him, good on you. You're probably really good at kicking toxic people out of your life. But personally, I feel like Astarion is a really well written character. His story is ultimately about what trauma can do to someone and how important having support is. If you show him enough love and kindness and understanding, he will heal and become good(ish). If you don't, he won't heal, and he'll become a villain. You may not be able to "fix" him, but you can help him. And personally, my thought is always "why not?". Unless I'm doing a villain run I always want to help Astarion. It's heartwarming as hell to see him slowly start to trust people again, genuinely fall in love, start doing more good, and regain some of his hope in humanity. Shit's adorable. I personally like him a lot and I think he's worth giving a chance.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  6 місяців тому +9

      I completely agree with you. Ultimately, it is the player who helps him shape his path and worldview through their actions.
      And in Act 3 he is noticeably more agreeable when it comes to helping people. After finishing his quest without ascending he also has a more optimistic outlook on life in general. The way he hypes you to the final battle is sweet. I feel like that is a ton of progress even if he isn’t full on “good” at that point. Which is also fine, and I personally feel like he doesn’t have to match up to the traditionally “good” moral compass completely, more fun that way. One proper hero (Tav) is already enough. :D

  • @meemo506
    @meemo506 7 місяців тому +55

    Thank you! I always RP as a precious idiot cinnamon roll and Astarion would absolutely die for me lol. I have more trouble when I'm mean, honestly. He's never turned me down once, and usually propositions me before the party. He's a cinnamon roll on the inside.

  • @CeaseEcho
    @CeaseEcho 6 місяців тому +19

    The secret to romancing Astarion is when you're about to do something nice, turn to him and say, "Darling you look so tired you should go rest at camp."
    Just avoid disapproval, send him to camp, give him that spooky book he likes and don't objectify him or force him to so something he doesn't want to do.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  6 місяців тому +10

      I mean you can also just live with the disapprovals and still romance him. They don’t matter that much in the bigger picture.

    • @Lunakitty1234
      @Lunakitty1234 5 місяців тому +4

      So I don’t have to put baby in time out while I try to help the teiflings not die? That’s good to know. Thanks lol

    • @dacksonflux
      @dacksonflux 2 години тому

      Their approval still adjusts while at camp. You just don't get the updates.
      You were already playing in a way he approved of. Lol

  • @GabbyIsFine
    @GabbyIsFine 7 місяців тому +82

    It really goes the same way for every character: Protect them, respect their problems, don't ignore them, and they will like you.
    There are very few times on which you can do something that doesn't directly harm them and still cause them to actually hate you (like, lose a lot of approval at once or even leave), and none of these times is "making a morally good choice".
    I always end Act 1 with Astarion at over 60, and that's without him ever leaving my party, so he is present for every good choice I make. I bet his approval could go much higher if I strategically left him at camp when I knew I had to pick something he would disapprove, but it is not necessary at all.

  • @sionan7937
    @sionan7937 7 місяців тому +53

    I'm playing CG and I'm already at high approval in Act 1. It hasn't been difficult at all! Haven't had to demand payment or be a jerk. Just giving him snark right back at him and being accepting of his vampirism was enough for him to proposition me and then after that it's been cake.

  • @kizuna2225
    @kizuna2225 7 місяців тому +11

    I feel like a lot of people that say this never rly tried to understand astarion as a character they see him as this chaotic evil manipulator of a vampire and dont try to learn what actually makes him tick chaotic? Absoluteoy, evil? Far from it

  • @LastSummersDance
    @LastSummersDance 7 місяців тому +27

    This is a fantastic resource, thank you! I never had issues romancing him on a good-aligned character (to be fair, I do love my deception checks and I don't play doormats) but now I've got something awesome to point people at :)

  • @jenvanderputten4277
    @jenvanderputten4277 7 місяців тому +21

    I played it the same, but at the party, when he said "I'm talking about sex", he then said "but not with you, that would be disgusting, ugh". Everyone else was thirsty though. I had several of those scenes with him after the party though, like the mirror one, so maybe i didn't get a high enough approval before the party happened.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +21

      Oof, he can be really brutal here. Sounds like not enough approval to me, but most of the later scenes with him don't give that much approval either way (except Cazador discussion), so idk. Do you know if it was Neutral/Medium?

  • @suenzhong7891
    @suenzhong7891 7 місяців тому +16

    I annoyed him with my bleeding heart but he still thinks I am exceptional lmao

  • @anska7475
    @anska7475 7 місяців тому +30

    I got some approval for defending him after the bite, though I do not know how much and I had to pick the meanest option (If you don't like it, you can leave.). Also I didn't loose approval in the encounter with Gandrel, when I left the conversation early. It seems that he is mostly annoyed about leading him on with all the in-joke vampire banter and then not letting him have the kill.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +14

      Yes, both the "mean" option and the "I trust him" option give approval when defending him to the party (Larian is working on fixing the latter not triggering currently). Interesting to know about Gandrel. Overall, often it is not the outcome of the conversation that plays a role, but how you handle it. E.g., in my first playthrough I saved the artist by buying him out from the Zhentarim, so I got a disapproval for spending money. Second time I managed to rescue him without paying by tricking them, so I didn't loose approval.

    • @anska7475
      @anska7475 7 місяців тому +13

      ​@@carianbanditI got the impression that he takes more offence with big heroic talk than with the actions themselves. With my Durge I told Zevlor that I didn't have time for his problems, but then played errand-girl for him anyway. Astarion obviously liked the former but he didn't seem to have issues with us running around and helping Zevlor and the tieflings either.

  • @whythisshitiseventhere0069
    @whythisshitiseventhere0069 7 місяців тому +24

    I play as a chaotic good character and it was really easy to romance Astarion lol. Moreover, I ended up having high approval with all of my companions by act 1. It's not that hard if you can predict what they'll like and what they won't.

  • @katiatall
    @katiatall 7 місяців тому +28

    Nice video, great job! 50 minutes of Astarion )))

  • @creativecharacters692
    @creativecharacters692 6 місяців тому +8

    I managed to romance him with my bard, who was kind to everyone who was innocent, like the Teiflings and such. and while he didn't like me at first, he called me naïve, I won him over with quick wit and clever responses to things. Like using persuasion and deception to take down bad guys rather then fighting them. In the 3rd act after his personal quest he even admits he didn't like my bard at first but then she grew on him as they adventured more together. they are really sweet together now.

  • @anaterka231
    @anaterka231 7 місяців тому +7

    I also found that if you want to do/say somenthing that a companion would dissaprove, you can just ungroup the party and leave them out of earshot in many cases 🙃

  • @livbarrett8540
    @livbarrett8540 7 місяців тому +25

    That's a really nice guide. Thank you!

  • @CurNotKeer
    @CurNotKeer 7 місяців тому +21

    Playing as a mostly good but sometimes chaotic druid and the romance has been going smoothly! It kind of started out accidentally, too. But I’m here for it!
    While I was still getting the hang of in-game tone, I think I made some inadvertent choices that helped boost things. Telling the tiefling children to bathe the battlefield in blood and then having them all cry springs to mind. But yes, you gotta be true to your character and you can still make the boy happy.
    Side note, Volo rocking out at the end of this clip is everything.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      Haha, I didn't expect Volo to join in without an instrument, but the guy is so good he doesn't need one. :D

    • @princeshortie7907
      @princeshortie7907 7 місяців тому +2

      im ALSO a chaotic druid, my tav is kind of a mix of good person, tree lover, and A LITTLE SPRINKLING of corruption

  • @MehRHEE
    @MehRHEE 7 місяців тому +6

    So I saw someone comment on an Astarion video that they wouldn't mind dying my strangulation and thought it was the funniest thing. Didn't think it would actually be in scene, LMAO.

  • @KraftyKat93
    @KraftyKat93 7 місяців тому +8

    Sarcasm and chaotic fun seems to be the way to go with the pretty elf boy.which is honestly my default anyway. I usually help where I can when I play, but people that are jackasses or villains get the chaotic gremlin that takes great glee out of pissing people like them off.

  • @katiatall
    @katiatall 7 місяців тому +16

    Funny that rogue asks bard to kill a few brains.
    When we meet him first time I like to fail all the checks, there are lots of fun lines, like you’re little wriggling wretch,
    Fine effort but I saw them all, I walked on this ground when your ancestors learned to crawl.
    Plus we see his thoughts that he hides in the shadows and afraid of the sun, and he tries to hide these thoughts.
    And if we invite him to join us he says that he wanted to go alone, but if we first say that we are our own road, he is shocked )))
    And he also tells us please be careful when we approach a dying mind flyer, and when we hear goblins shooting at a grove says the same. I was surprised, before didn’t notice.

    • @Foxy4Love
      @Foxy4Love 7 місяців тому +3

      His interactions are different and interesting if you're playing as origin main character like Lae'zel or Shadowheart. Shadowheart and him is an interesting combination for a run. When you're Tav and Shadowheart is in your group she overrides most dialogue of him which is really annoying. Keep her out, just Gale and Laez'el in the group and he talks most of the time.

    • @katiatall
      @katiatall 7 місяців тому +2

      @@Foxy4Love yeees, so true,

  • @ChiakiNanami736
    @ChiakiNanami736 3 місяці тому +2

    Being the exact opposite of his sire on every possible level works wonders; who knew?

  • @KuruttaSaru
    @KuruttaSaru 6 місяців тому +6

    Yeah, you totally can be good and romance him, especially when You're playing a chaotic good character, as this one or simply chaotic neutral is the most compatible with him.
    During my original playthrough I based my character on my first chaotic good rogue from D&D campaign I played years ago. She basically had a very similar story to Astarion, doing previously a pretty atrocious jobs(assassinations included) for someone she owed her wellbeing and life. Difference was she could and had guts to change her life and when she came to fear for herself and saw through that person, she flew and was on the run from them from that time, always having to be wary of others. I felt like this was the perfect pick for roleplaying with Astarion romance in mind and his redemption, as I admit - I'm a sucker for redemption arcs.
    And mind You when I picked this character, all I knew was based on my knowledge of tropes that I concluded Astarion's questline included and all the "he is so evil, he wants to kill you in his introduction" comments. Then I got his introduction scene and I was like: really?! How can someone says that he want to kill you?! It says here, boldly, that he is just scared! That his entire motivation at the start is fear! He just want to be in control of the situation, that's the reason for the dagger!
    Then I had a nice conversation with him about how cornered animals are desperate and it was obvious he was refering to himself. Knowing this, I just never cornered him with anything and my character, believing in second chances, but not third ones, gave him her trust and it was the best decision ever. If You are lucky and do good, you can actually see how he likes children in first act in the grove.
    For real I played by totally chaotic good standards. Spared the goblin Frezzerk when he begged for life during the fight, saved Mayrina, saved Arabella and also never in any of my playthroughts did I killed the Gur. My character reasons for sparing Gandrel were that he felt harmless and she saw Astarion feels cornered(and is terrified), and that if they killed anyone they fear might be on them, soon they will have a mountain of bodies. That wasn't right and you can actually see that Astarion himself is confused about this encounter also as he later admits killing the Gur is nonsense because there will come more anyway and moments later he gets emotional and says he should kill anyone that seems like danger. It is obvious that at this point You're his moral compass, a guide, and he is confused about his situation. But I admit I'm guilty of killing Kagha as my character felt that she had weak will and would not change that easily, probably in future she would try to kill another child and felt like lawful/neutral evil character, especially after reading her mind. But nonenthless she often did good things and rescued whoever she could even if she did not admit or liked to promise anything. Astarion asked her about sleeping together for the first time in that Thayan necromancer's basement just after giving him the book and I was like "whoa, my friend, You're too fast... or are You liking me that much?" I remember I had already medium/high approval there and by the start of act 2 I was basically almost at 100 points.
    It's also worth mentioning rhat he is probably the only companion who sees destroying both camps on the same level morally. Life of a tiefling having the same weight as the life of a goblin for him. That's probably because he does not want to see others as monsters and don't want to be seen as one. Plus goblins are more chaotic so interacting with them means more fun, but overall at the party we can see that he is calmer and more content with tieflings(but a bit confused in new hero situation) and at the goblin party he swoons into his cooping mechanisms and seems to be a bit drunk like in the scene after he eats a bear. You can only guess that he want to have fun to not think about other things...
    To be truthfull all the romances are easy if You really try to understand characters. Right now I'm on a lawful evil run with a healthy reasoning character(meaning I'm helping the grove, because it have more sense for my Tav). Lae'zel come onto him like five seconds after I met Wyll for the first time and one second after I talked with Arabella's parents. I was pretty shocked, because I felt like I just started the game and they were standing near Volo at the grove with her like "I want You in my bed! Now!" Now I'm scared to think that I'm too good at being lawful evil. 😂

  • @theredheadwiththread1275
    @theredheadwiththread1275 7 місяців тому +3

    Saving this for later to listen while I'm sewing my kid's Halloween costume.
    I already knew this, but I like listening to a good video while I sew, so thanks.

  • @LadyAbstract
    @LadyAbstract 6 місяців тому +7

    I heard romancing him was hard but when i got the game it was so easy and i was confused at what people were talking about. I think the issue is people play with the intent to romance him (which is fine) but then they choose options they think hed like instead of just playing how they normally would. Just my opinion though. I went into the game interested in astarion but i was going to play how id play if it really was me and whoever i end up with due to that was who id be with if that makes sense. Meaning if astarion didnt like who i naturally was then id end up not being with him. Just so happened he approved of most of my decisions so it worked out. 😂 (I am currently still playing havent beaten it yet. Im in beginning of act 2)

  • @nocturna76
    @nocturna76 7 місяців тому +6

    every time i try to comment i get an error.. no idea what the heck that's about, but after seeing this, i can't believe ppl have trouble romancing him. you got way way more disapprovals than i ever did & still managed to get the romance to work (he likes me so much in my still non -evil playthroughs that the romance triggered way before the party)

  • @nerilei29
    @nerilei29 6 місяців тому +21

    I was surprised to learn that the internet say that it's hard to be friends with Astarion when you're playing a good character. Honestly, I had no problem with it, even without knowing his history I didn't immediately assume that he is evil. And he's not evil, his own safety is just important to him and he would like to have it first before he rushes to help others, and that is wise, normal and human. Moreover, his story explains well why he is the way he is, 200 years of horror in Cazador's palace must have influenced his behavior and the way he sees the world. This also explains these "Astarion dissaproves" moments especially in act 1 when he is just starting to understand that not everyone he meets wants to hurt him or something like that. He begins to learn to trust. Yes, I left him at the camp a few times when I had to make a few big good decisions, but now I know it wasn't really necessary.
    I just let him bite me, and I was nice to him, I was there for him without judging him for what he is like and without shouting at him just because he's a vampire. Thanks to this he started opening and my character became friends with him already in act 1, and yet there is still act 2 and 3 and quests in it to rise this friendship.
    Now I'm at the beginning of act 3 and my friendship with him has been maximum, I don't know, in the middle of act 2 or after halfway through act 2, and as I said, I play a good character who helps everyone around, makes good decisions, in my opinion. And I also often go with Astarion in a group because his dialogues, behavior and party banter are great.
    So yeah, I really don't know where the problems are in making friends in him. I would probably have to specially keep my friendship bar with him low and I would have to make sure he didn't like my character, particularly. I think the evil character has a harder time make freindship with him because he's afraid of the bad guys😅

  • @chloesantos8637
    @chloesantos8637 7 місяців тому +5

    Love the performance at the end lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      One of the few times my bard didn’t actually fail a performance check haha

  • @noxthefriendlyghost
    @noxthefriendlyghost 5 місяців тому +3

    Yup, I'm currently playing a generally good character and I am romancing Astarion. I admit it *seemed* slightly harder at the beginning, because he kept disapproving my random good deeds of the day, but things started to change once I kept playing. It helps that I'm playing a bard who uses deception and persuasion like it's nothing, and who is dramatically silly every once in a while. Of course he still disapproves this and that on ocassions, but all the other instances when he approves keep the balance.
    I guess you simply need to be slightly more patient with him, beside listening to his story, being supportive and treating him like his own person. And probably don't jump to conclusions too soon, because these characters are so incredibly complex, which means you need to put more effort into getting to know and understand them, regardless of the nature of your relationship with them. Hell, I thought Lae'zel was gonna get out of my party without thinking twice for example, judging by the way she was reacting to my Tav's decisions at first... yet she was the second one to warm up to me, right after Gale. Now I have her on High Approval, same with Astarion, while Gale is on Exceptional.
    I feel like this is the type of game you need to approach with a very open mindset, as well as an open heart, and treat its characters like real humans if you want to understand them on a deeper level. Placing them in "good" or "evil" boxes is not gonna do it, because they're far more than just that.

  • @0kieD0kiee
    @0kieD0kiee 7 місяців тому +4

    I’m playing a relatively neutral character, not intentionally evil by any means just self serving. But definitely doesn’t leave people for dead or un-necessarily hurt others for the most part unless he feels it would benefit him. So far…things are moving along quite well with Astarion and I couldn’t be happier lol

  • @dacksonflux
    @dacksonflux 2 години тому

    Reject them and do the quest anyway. It's really simple.
    Nettie asks you to find Halsin. Say no and then go kill the goblins. Get your vampire + bear daddy love triangle

  • @gabrielabautistamusic5797
    @gabrielabautistamusic5797 7 місяців тому +2

    I definitely wasn't a super goody two shoes during my run but I still saved a lot of people just because I wanted to, and while my Tav was a little rough around the edges and did kill a lot of people, it was only the bad people and I still had Astarion fall for me. I didn't even have to wait until the party for Tav and him to get "intimate."

  • @Slothgreedenvy
    @Slothgreedenvy 7 місяців тому +1

    Thabks for this, love these kind of videos.

  • @alfredochu1357
    @alfredochu1357 7 місяців тому +5

    wow thank you so much I needed this 🥰🥰

  • @KopaXTani
    @KopaXTani 2 місяці тому +1

    I’m so saving this video for when I can continue playing this again! Been focused on P3P because of P3R being out. Thanks!

  • @wingdingmasquerade
    @wingdingmasquerade 3 місяці тому +1

    Sometime I'll do a bard playthrough, they seem to have really fun responses. I just love the unpredictable chaos of playing as a Wild Magic sorcerer.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  3 місяці тому +1

      My bard here is multi-classed into WM sorcerer too, so I know what you mean. Just do both, problem solved. :D

  • @FG-ub1lx
    @FG-ub1lx 3 місяці тому +1

    Playing for the first time as a goody two shoes (but very sarcastic) paladin and I just about finished saving the druids in act 1 with high approval for him. The thing that really sent it up was meeting the hunter down at the swamp and just playing along with Astarion (also letting him bite you and just being generally sarcastic)

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  3 місяці тому

      Did you kill Gandrel, hmm? 🤨

  • @Amaladenfer666
    @Amaladenfer666 7 місяців тому +4

    I asked the question to many people... no one could answer me... thanks to have done it :D

  • @rayswift5711
    @rayswift5711 4 місяці тому +1

    Thank you! I've been searching for this guide forever. Astarion is the only companion I couldn't crack. I now feel sorry that I didn't let him drink my blood (because man, we don't know each other. Boundaries). I couldn't stand him because he would disapprovers any damn good thing I did (and I always play lawful good characters, heroic with good heart) but now I want to try a run where I play a good character and still romance him (or get his approval maxed out). I know I can be brought to love him. I only need to see his good side, like with Lae'zel (she disapproved a lot of what I did at first, but when I stood up for her in the Crèche it completely changed her attitude towards me. Astarion didn't approved me once even when I helped him with his entire quest at Cazador's)

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  4 місяці тому

      Good luck! Hope it works out. :) I have videos for other acts as well in case you need extra assistance.

  • @juliabe408
    @juliabe408 3 місяці тому +1

    It's my first playtrough and I've deciced my warlock character to be good, but realistic and pragmatic when it comes to the choices between achieving goals with as little fights as possible or play bold goodie. My Tav's basically the diplomat and silvertongue of our party. She helps guys in need, of what Astarion is not a fan, but she's also here for persuasing, cheating, opening many doors and even slaying enemies like orthon with her words (in my headcanon she herself was surprised about the last one, and in the game Astarion was very impressed). Fortunately, Astarion likes that in her as, apparently, he has it in himself too. The relationship and approval grew slowly, but staedily between my Tav and him and now they're perfectly happy together.
    P.S. When the party came in the orthons place and my Tav started questioning the scary demon about his reasons and motives like a proper investigator she is, Astarion was so impatient and went yelling to the whole cave something like "Will we kill that bastard or not?" I laughed so hard and instantly imagined the 🙂 look on my Tav's face while she covered his mouth with her hand and said something like "You're right of course but just keep you voice a bitling lower, okay?" and some excuse for the orthon that they came not for him but for Balthazar and it's Balthazar my companion wants to slay so much he can't keep quiet about it.😂

  • @amberh709
    @amberh709 22 дні тому +1

    Astarion isn't evil. He approves of good/noble things (especially as the game progresses) you just gotta be sassy af like him 😂

  • @OneFrugalDuck
    @OneFrugalDuck 7 місяців тому +3

    I think I get it now. Basically, you have to save the grove. I didn't do that with my first run through. He was my main character that I used. He used me as a juice box and I played through his whole story arc. I didn't even get to romance him as an option. I though it was my folk hero playthrough but apparently it wasn't.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      With enough approval you don’t really need to save it, but the party triggers multiple romance related moments with companions, so it makes it easier.
      What did you do with the grove though? I’m curious. I assume you didn’t raid it?

    • @OneFrugalDuck
      @OneFrugalDuck 7 місяців тому +1

      I was playing with my boyfriend (he was dark urge) and one of the tiefling children told us to steal the Idol of Silvanus. They offered us a cut of anything they stole like a crime ring so we tried to steal the idol. Well, it lead to an outright war the druids and the tieflings annnnnd we killed the entire grove. lmao The only romance I had in the play through was The Emperor. lmao @@carianbandit

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      lmaao still got some I guess haha@@OneFrugalDuck

  • @TheLedyastroangela
    @TheLedyastroangela 7 місяців тому +4

    I missed several camp scenes before the bite (2) and outside (3) damn, still I have some what good relationship with him, I already started his romance but I still try to be good and well, asking for compensation here and then wont hurt anyone, the npc give u stuff anyway even if u dont ask for it

  • @TheRamen
    @TheRamen Місяць тому +2

    This mf was my BFF by the end. And my Tav is chaotic good. But im ussd to "sketchy" rogue types who have more to their character. It seems a lot of ppl cant handle complex characters despite the demand for it.

  • @KopaXTani
    @KopaXTani 2 місяці тому +2

    I’m glad to know romancing Astarion is possible without being an asshole or Dark Urge because, like me, my character would never do or say things that would hurt other races unless they attack her first.

  • @2niiMo
    @2niiMo 4 місяці тому +1

    In ma good noodle run (wizard/sorceress). He didn't like me at first because of ma bleeding heart. He even rejected me and I was petty, so kicked him off the squad and left him in camp. He then came around and started putting the moves on me and I did sleep with him. We made plans to take control of the worms but theeeen Wyll snatched me in Act 2. Ended things amicably with Astarion. Left it open for a sordid affair lol. Haven't finished the game yet but so far. Wyll has me making plans for a lavish, flush life as Duchess of Baldur's Gate 👑

  • @Anna-md4dv
    @Anna-md4dv 4 місяці тому +1

    i've literally never had an issue with his approval. i've played a goody two shoes since i started playing back in 2021 and have never romanced anyone else lol

  • @aviendha1154
    @aviendha1154 День тому

    It’s super easy, I usually play as goody two shoes as a Durge can be, and I’ve never found Astarions approval hard. If you’re having a hard time, just choose the mocking or mean dialog options. Shadowheart likes it when you lie, Astarion tends to like it when you intimidate. Also be nice to all the cats, he likes cats!

  • @kstar1489
    @kstar1489 7 місяців тому +3

    If you’re not mean to him it’s not hard to romance him in what I’ve seen and experienced myself

  • @irenemachetti5968
    @irenemachetti5968 7 місяців тому +1

    ThATS WHAT I NEEDEDDDDD

  • @acesaidbye
    @acesaidbye 6 місяців тому +2

    I threw mud at a guy and he found it funny i think me and the vamp will get along

  • @siyrean
    @siyrean 7 місяців тому +2

    i missed so many conversations early in game because i didn't realise how important taking a rest was even if you didn't need it. But even then, I still managed to get him while being nice. I just lied a lot to npc to get information/not be a pushover, and didn't shut him down when he was mad power scheming while never agreeing to them. Certainly had no qualms taking a few disapproves when what he wanted was morally reprehensible. I also happily punched him in the face when he killed me.

  • @RovingPunster
    @RovingPunster 7 місяців тому +2

    3:03 The very first thing I did after discovering dyes was to re'color Astarion's chalk colored ruffle shirt to bright RED. It seemed so appropo.
    I used colors to accentuate/reflect the personality and/or alignment of all my follower's armor and camp attire - Red for Astarion, Black & red for karlach & wyll, black & white for Laezel, black & azure for dark shadowheart, blue & gold or white for light shadowheart, purple for gale, Brown & green for halsin, etc.
    I heep all my dyes in a single pouch inside the traveller chest in camp.

  • @SkycometFallen
    @SkycometFallen 29 днів тому +1

    Storytelling-wise, I think Spawn Astarion works best with a good character.

  • @brotalnia
    @brotalnia 6 місяців тому

    Another thing that gives Astarion approval of in the Goblin Camp is convincing Crusher to kiss your feet.

  • @sarahparkins1161
    @sarahparkins1161 7 місяців тому +2

    Please tell me your doing an act 2 play through! I loved watching this

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +1

      I was thinking to maybe make a video on how to continue the romance in Act 2 since there were some changes after patch 3. But would you also be interested to see the approvals/disapprovals? After Act 1 he is way easier to please. :D

  • @tiavaga
    @tiavaga 7 місяців тому +4

    Hi, this is a great and useful video, may I ask what are your character's class, attributes and skills? I specially liked the percepcion success at 0:30

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      Glad you like it. My starting class is a Bard. At lvl 3 I multi-class into sorcerer, hence dialogue from both, they work well together due to being Charisma-based (I have mine at 16). Due to a combination of starting class/race/background (Guild Artisan) I have pretty high Persuasion, Deception, and Intimidation as well as extra Performance, Perception and Insight abilities. But my extra perception is just +2 or +3, so that perception success is mostly luck.

    • @tiavaga
      @tiavaga 7 місяців тому

      @@carianbandit Thank you so much for your answer 😃

  • @LivingInZeroZen
    @LivingInZeroZen 7 місяців тому +5

    i havent even touched the underdark yet in act 1 and I have almost 70 approval and I have been a goody goody the WHOLE way. Saved the grove and everything and didnt even give him the Necromany of thay yet xD

  • @bridgetmadden5716
    @bridgetmadden5716 6 місяців тому +2

    Dang your Tav is so pretty!

  • @JogoBelIa
    @JogoBelIa 4 місяці тому +2

    Yes, I didn’t manage to romance astarion in my first run. It turned out i had a bug that cut out one of the most important conversation with him and I didn’t know it back then. So I waited and waited and almost nothing change bc I was good so in the act of deperation and zero hope i end up having sex with mind flayer lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  3 місяці тому +1

      I guess the Emperor ended up your bosom companion that time. 😅

  • @rosavillanueva5189
    @rosavillanueva5189 5 місяців тому +1

    Astarion disapproves forgiving the horned child? Buddy, if it weren't for Tav's pretty little heart, you'd already be dead at this point.

  • @sakurasama99
    @sakurasama99 5 місяців тому

    Yeah I definitely needed to realise how the dialogues were triggered and that long resting doesnt mean less time to save the tieflings a lot sooner because I missed out on a LOT of dialogue 😂

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      The sense of urgency you get at the start of the game definitely doesn’t help. In my first run I missed a lot too.

  • @Kat31017
    @Kat31017 6 місяців тому +1

    If you are an asshole to him, he will be an asshole back. Simple as that really.

  • @Phoenix12408
    @Phoenix12408 7 місяців тому +1

    When does the drunk bear cutscene trigger? Is it random or is it after a certain point? I'm very behind in the main story but I've somehow already managed to romance Astarion (it happened before fighting Ethel, and I haven't been to the goblin camp yet), I just don't wanna miss anything. I did miss the stargazing scene though :/

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому

      I believe it is next in queue after the bite scene & whose blood you'd drink discussion. I do not know if any of these get overwritten by romance scenes if you start early, or just get queued later.

    • @Phoenix12408
      @Phoenix12408 7 місяців тому

      @@carianbandit I actually got it right after I left the comment lol, and I had both the blood discussion and the drunk bear after I started romance so it looks like they don't get overwritten. Thanks : )

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому

      @@Phoenix12408 that's great, enjoy! ;)

  • @JulianaBlewett
    @JulianaBlewett 4 місяці тому +1

    Right now in my play through everyone wants to bed me except Astarion, lol. He will soon enough

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  4 місяці тому +1

      He’s playing hard to get and it’s working. 😏

  • @ladyamaranth
    @ladyamaranth 6 місяців тому

    This. I always play good characters and Astarion is always trying to knock heels lmao. I had to beat him back with a stick on my Gale romance PT

  • @arashimifune2853
    @arashimifune2853 7 місяців тому +4

    That was not difficult at all! I was helping everybody, he didn't like it, but oh well, never used ilithid powers, allowed him to bite me 2 or 3 times, was nice to him (as I am nice to everyone on my team)... Maybe I had it easier, because as a fellow rouge I saw often using persuasion and deception? Anyways, then the tiefling party at the camp happened and the romance proceeded smoothly. Doing the same thing now as the dark urge.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому

      afaik using deception/persuasion doesn't make a difference for approval unless specific approval is tied to it, which isn't that much in Act 1 from what I've seen (at least the ones available for "good" actions). It will trigger a bunch of inspiration points for him though, but they don't influence approval.

  • @bibianac.1131
    @bibianac.1131 4 місяці тому

    It's me, the annoying commenter :) Could'nt find my comment, but just wanted to say that I found my mistake, will have to go back a couple saves, but it's all right, your videos have been so helpful, I saved them for futures PT's!

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  4 місяці тому +1

      I think it was under Act 2 video. ;) Nice that you managed to solve it. Good luck & thanks!

  • @lilorlybear1146
    @lilorlybear1146 7 місяців тому +5

    So I’m super confused bcuz I did everything right where he was concerned, got all the proper camp scenes, did his Orthon quest, etc… but upon entering Baldur’s Gate at the start of Act3 he randomly dumped me. It genuinely caught me so off guard that I stopped playing for a while. The only thing I didn’t do was meet Araj in Act2 but many others told me they did a complete romance with Astarion without her so I don’t know what to think. All I can do is go back hours of gameplay and redo all of Act2 to make sure I get the Araj interaction. (sighs)

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +10

      Did you get a "confession" scene in Act 2 where he says he's been trying to manipulate you? Normally he dumps you in Act 3 if you do not trigger that scene. There are two versions of it - one before you meet Araj (you might need at least High approval) and another one after you meet her, it shouldn't matter which one you get (unless you say something he wouldn't like of course).

    • @lilorlybear1146
      @lilorlybear1146 7 місяців тому +3

      @@carianbandit No, I never got the confession scene despite constantly going to camp to hopefully tigger it. I knew that's the scene that needed to happen but it never came. And I've had high approval almost the entirety of Act2. Hence my absolute confusion. Yet, I still got the Durge scene where he ties me down to keep watch/protect me over night and says the "We're technically in this together" line and all the other stuff that clearly indicate romance. It's just frustrating. All I can do is go back and do Act2 again.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +8

      @@lilorlybear1146 Sorry to hear about it, it sure sucks. :( Last thing I can think of - did you camp inside "Moonrise Towers" area specifically? I believe it only triggers there, it won't trigger in any other camp in the Shadow-Cursed Lands.

    • @lilorlybear1146
      @lilorlybear1146 7 місяців тому +3

      @@carianbandit No, I didn't. I camped outside the towers instead, right next to the fast travel sigil before you start Act3 to BG. I swear to god if that small decision was the only reason this happened... I will riot lol. Ah well, I think I may still redo Act2 anyway because I'm kind of curious to do things differently and get those Araj scenes. I always went to the Shar temple stuff before Moonrise Towers. Thanks for the advice anyway :) Appreciate it.

    • @dominika3762
      @dominika3762 7 місяців тому +1

      It must have bugged out for you. You should definitely get the confession scene after killing the orthon and Raphael telling Astsrion what his scars mean. I don't think you have to redo act 2. Can't you go back a few hours and talk to Araj in Moonrise? That should trigger one of the confession scenes.

  • @DARA-gi9ci
    @DARA-gi9ci 5 місяців тому

    how do you get all of these??? in my playthroughs i somehow seem to always miss all of these and only get the bite scene

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      For camp scenes you need to Long Rest sufficiently (or do Partial Rests at least), some conversations depend on certain milestones you reach in the story. If you only get the bite scene you likely progress through the game too fast and don't rest enough.
      Also, early 2-3 camp scenes are very easy to miss & have some variations depending on the order you speak to your companions in. The scenes where you can discuss camping & preferred way to die happen before you reach the Grove (and the Grove is very close to the crash site), once you reach it they cannot be triggered anymore.
      And if you're playing Dark Urge it is even easier to miss the scenes or jumble the order of events because DU scenes will take priority over anything else.

  • @faeriequeen882
    @faeriequeen882 5 місяців тому

    I just have a question. Is this video in order of your actual play through. Like did you rest first then go to the grove? And did you get Karlach before you went to the Goblin camp? Just wondering.

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому +1

      Yes, clips are in the order of events, you can see my hit point progression ;) (the only exception is the tadpole conversations that I grouped together).
      If you don’t rest before going to the Grove you will not get the first two camp conversations you see in the video.

    • @faeriequeen882
      @faeriequeen882 5 місяців тому

      @@carianbandit thank you. I accidentally made the mistake of going straight to Goblin camp after finding Emerald Grove, which probably explains why I struggled to defeat the bosses

  • @guitarmama06
    @guitarmama06 5 місяців тому

    Also, if you free Lae'zel *after* recruiting Astarion, and you tell her to say 'please', Astarion approves, so that's one more approval from him.

  • @annali7189
    @annali7189 7 місяців тому +1

    I'm still on my first playthrough. I'm a mostly good but selfish bard. I was surprised when his affection for my firs Tav was high in Act 3. As the fights got more crowded I would make him bite any humanoid asap for the buff. I wonder if that helped? Lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому

      Him biting you or enemies after the initial bite scene doesn't impact approval. :) At some point in Act 2 and onwards he gets way less judgemental, so not surprised your approval is high by Act 3.

    • @annali7189
      @annali7189 7 місяців тому

      @@carianbandit He still disapproved lots of my actions of kindness. It might be because I still haven't confronted Cazador.

  • @Helen12980
    @Helen12980 5 місяців тому

    I think i’ve been doing somenthing wrong. Its my first play and i didnt get romance with ANYONE help. there are things that i’ve missed on camp?

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      Are you in Act 1? Do you long rest often? Some characters don’t really have a romance scene in Act 1 but you can start their romance by flirting with them.
      You can also only start a romance with two people at the same time. You can normally tell you triggered the romance if their greetings are different.
      Wyll’s romance can be started in Act 2 if you don’t have two other romances going.

  • @koookeeez
    @koookeeez 5 місяців тому

    I played through too fast and i missed the first few cutscenes and now im debating starting all over 😭

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      They are very easy to miss, unfortunately. And the first few camp scenes have variations depending on the order you speak to your companions in.

  • @kikithepupper6774
    @kikithepupper6774 5 місяців тому

    aw shoot... This makes me think its too late for me now

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      Do you mean too late to start a romance? If you’re in Act 1 it’s still theoretically possible even after the party if you can arrive at High approval before leaving to the next area (and don’t have other two romances active).

  • @karikasumi888
    @karikasumi888 7 місяців тому +25

    I don't think you should even have to choose certain choices to get him to like you. These people are just one more person manipulating him if they choose things not natural to them just to get his approval. When I play I'm going to do what I want and see who ends up liking the actions the most! 😖

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +30

      Ultimately you do not have to, I agree it is best to role-play your character with whatever they would do or say in a certain situation. Personally, I like to play a "hero" and in my first playthrough I was aiming to romance Astarion and got a bit worried with everyone saying he doesn't like good guys. But I decided not to change my decisions just because of it, and was fully prepared to get a "not with you, ew". But it worked out and felt more natural & rewarding story-wise for my game/character.

    • @Sara-df5xi
      @Sara-df5xi 7 місяців тому +4

      I agree. I'm playing a sweet young druid, away from her circle for the first time, very good, naive, and helpful to all. The hardest time I had was with a Tav that was very chaotic and just made random weird choices all the time.

  • @WobblesandBean
    @WobblesandBean 3 місяці тому

    Ok but why does the demon look like Kevin Nealon

  • @drownedinnostalgia3433
    @drownedinnostalgia3433 7 місяців тому +1

    28:56 LMAO

  • @UzzR04
    @UzzR04 5 місяців тому

    Started a new playthrough and got to romance him in 7 hours, wirse thing i did was kill Timber and he approves of that. Its pretty easy ngl

  • @mun3698
    @mun3698 7 місяців тому +2

    Oh. So I didn’t need to headbutt him after he held a dagger to my throat in the beginning? 😐 Damn lol

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  7 місяців тому +2

      Haha, there are two ways this can unfold based on passing/failing the perception check when you agree to help with the "brain thing" (if you refuse to help Astarion will always grab you I think). In my first playthrough I failed the perception check, and he did the bit where he pulls you to the ground. This video is from my second playthrough and it was a friendlier encounter due to passing the check.

  • @elfaro1607
    @elfaro1607 5 місяців тому

    He told me he has standards 😭

    • @carianbandit
      @carianbandit  5 місяців тому

      Oh no! Try not coming onto him in that dialogue. That only works if you have pretty high approval as far as I know. I realised now I didn’t mention this in the description. My apologies.

  • @aliveslice
    @aliveslice 7 місяців тому

    36:57 38:48

  • @isabellag6220
    @isabellag6220 7 місяців тому +2

    I was too good and astarion couldn’t stand me 😭. Gale loves me tho, it’s not him who I had in mind.

  • @KethusNadroev
    @KethusNadroev 7 місяців тому

    Nope, didn't get the initial scenes, he was disapproving of any good action I took, he was scowling at me until the biting scene. I let him do whatever he wants there just to keep him neutral. Now I try to keep him outside of earshot when I talk to people.

  • @masshysteria200
    @masshysteria200 7 місяців тому

    You can have him leave the party too, if you know an option will give him disapproval, and them bring him back afterwards too. A little cheap, but every little bit helps

  • @noctoi
    @noctoi 6 місяців тому +2

    I truly don't understand how there are so many people saying "you can't romance Astarion when you play a good character, he's a soulless murderer"... I've had hundreds of hours and dozens of EA runs as well as two full game runs, and NONE of them have been evil. Regardless of whether I've romanced him in a given run, he's ALWAYS been above 50% approval before I even get into the Underdark. I haven't gone into the the Mountain pass or the Shadow Cursed Lands with less than 75% approval. You don't have to be an evil doormat, you just have to be pragmatic and actually treat him like he's a person rather than a punching bag... 😒

  • @lechecbb
    @lechecbb 7 місяців тому +6

    Like many others here, I had no idea so many people had a hard time getting approval from Astarion as an overall good person. The stat of 10,000 being rejected by him made me genuinely guffaw.
    I haven't done anything purely evil nor good in my current playthrough, with him practically a staple in my party, and ended act 1 with him at around good/great approval. In my current and previously unfinished playthrough I still had him at good enough approval that he would proposition me for sex at the party, though I did reject him during one of them. And even then he would ask me again while in the underdark because my approval was still pretty good.
    Honestly, with all of the disappovals I do get from him, I still think I would be at like 90 or more by act 3 (finished act 2 at 100, with natural confession triggered at 79). Astarion is chaotic neutral at best the majority of the game, with him being chaotic good by the end of his quest line if you continue that route, and that's kinda how you have to approach him in turn. He doesn't want you to be a paragon of good, nor an emissary of evil. He wants someone who embraces the unfairness of life, but unlike him for the majority of the game, continues to do what they believe is right in spite of it.
    Basically, I suggest approaching him like one would this question: If the world has hurt you, how would you respond? Would you say "The world hurt me, so I'm going to hurt it back" (Astarions view the majority of the game)? Or "The world hurt me, but I'm going to do my best to make sure it hurts no one else"?. I chose the latter, and it's worked for me quite well.