When Getting "Friend-zoned" Leads to Heartbreak & Oneitis
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
- This request comes from a very successful man looking for help, who is now heartbroken over a woman, and has bad case of oneitis for her.
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Is there any place we can view the original email from the guy?
I just can't believe what I'm reading. He knows it's wrong and that it won't work, but then he keeps writing, "I think I still have a shot" and "My friends are telling me she's just scared" hahaha. He's finding any & every excuse to keep the flame going for a whaman that doesn't give 2-shits about him, except giving him a few honeyed words to keep his fire burning. Bottom-line: she is stuck in his head & she's not going _anywhere_. He could be stuck with this woman in his head for years and years! He might even turn into a stalker...Because eventually, she's going to lose interest & discard him like a child getting tired of an old toy. And that's a sad fucking state to be in.
DO Men need/hunt for love as much as Women need/hunt for attention !!??
@@pluzzybear9902 he is just having problems
@Julio cut him some slack it happens
he wanted advice from you on how to win the girl... you gave him advice on how to win himself. nicely done!
james wendling YES!!
How can a guy win something that's this much of a mess. Why bother?
Man you are SO cheesy!! Seriously, what is with you lot and your little soundbites?!
@@stevec3526 By walking away, ghosting her and moving the f%^k on, that's how!
I almost admire this guy for having the courage to share this story considering how pathetically beta it is.
I do, it’s amazing how he was still wondering if there was a hope for the relationship when she made out with an alpha male in the corner, right in front of him! “I don’t want to give up hope” it’s crazy what we guys think when we fall hard. In my teens and 20s, I was there too.
All been there at some point and some people still are (myself included). Thanks Rich for helping me see how beta I am still with my texts to my oneites.
So many of us have done crap like this because of the bullshit romantic conditioning we thought it was the right thing to do to get the girl
I was gonna make a judgment against him and then I read ur comment and realized ur observation..Thank you..he does have a lot of balls to put this out there.
@@jakedrago7805 I'm guilty as charged. Avoid at all costs.
He's in the friend zone because of long phone conversations and being available all the time. I stopped that crap in my early 20s and haven't been friend-zoned since. Sure I've been rejected but it's less painful when you haven't invested a ton of time in her
Yeah good advice
@Dark Caesar
Yes... one time is all it takes, for life.
I was 18 when it happened to me, I was dating only her, and because I had long term plans with her for life (soooo stupid at 18) when she wanted sex I didn't take it "respecting her virginity until later for marriage" I can't believe those words came out of my stupid mouth then, but they did, so later THAT YEAR she married a doctor she was working with, she was a nurse; she stopped seeing me for a month and didn't even told me, so obviously she was fucking him while seeing me. It devastated me for two or three years.... Lesson learned. ONE time.
This guy should treat his female relations like negotiations just like he has to do for his business, apply THAT and he will be fine.
Less painful as well when you’ve got good advice from these videos swimming around in your brain. Sure, the shape of the exterior might be nice. It’s a cave of unfortunate events inside, though. They single? Ruining their own life single-handedly. They coupled? Makes bad choices in men, otherwise they wouldn’t be leading on with you. Female supposed monk mode with kids? Just wants a wallet for them. If none of those common scenarios fit, you can bet you’re in the friend zone for the simple fact that you supply attention. If you are in control of your feelings, it can be fun to play with them. Go hot and cold, get them to work harder for your free attention again. Ultimately, once you’ve done that a bit you can really see what a b* she is, too 😂😂😂 as soooon as you show a sign of wanting the cake again, shop shuts for business. Always keep in mind it’s a game, and you mean nothing to her above her need for eyeballs.
Being in the friendzone isn’t a bad thing. It teaches how women think. You can move from the friendzone if you understand women.
True
Better to be rejected than to be friend zoned.
Best advice i live by, Richard gave..........is NO FREE ATTENTION towards woman.
Preach, Brother!
This dude reminds me of my 15 year old self when I had oneitis with a girl. Dude grow up an actually swallow the pill.
Yup
Give em the red one
ya, totally reminds me of my high school self.
I had oneitus with a woman. After two dates she said she wanted us to be friends.
I told her it's boyfriend/girlfriend or nothing. I thanked her for her time and left her there on the second date after telling her I won't be in touch.
I ghosted her. After three days she was sending me constant messages and calling me. I told her to stop bothering me, because she knew what the conditions are for her to be in my life. She asked me out on a third date.
We went out and she was totally different. Very much like a girlfriend and we slept together that night.
All guys should be direct with women, tell them you will not accept a friend zone situation, and be prepared to ghost them.
Clear, helpful and succinct. Awesome. :-)
@mike a Spot on there.. I only use messages and phone to set up a date. Even if I have nothing on that night I'm still too busy for long talks on the phone. We can talk on dates.
This guy in the video was something wasn't he ??
Long talks on the phone, then he sees someone kissing his lady, and he still says he's working on the relationship. I'd have hit the road long ago.
@mike a or just tell her if i wanted a friend i would buy a dog.
Sounds like she was shit testing you. She wouldn’t have responded the way she did if she truly wanted to be just friends
YES! 3 days ghosting her? I'm in the same situation... I'm going to go for a week.
I’m 39. If this channel existed when I was 18 I would be in a very different situation now.
This is like an addict being friends with a drug dealer who refuses to sell him drugs....
Friendzone, just a nice name for a Trash can.
Good idea
WORD.
Sounds like me when I was a simp😂😂😂
Let's not judge him we all have to go through this to learn unless you have been alpha your whole life.I hope he learns from this.
Yeaa i did this BS in high school. Not as a grown adult, but we def all been there 😂
This story is criiinnngyyyyyyy
Hahahahah
havent we all done shit like this?
@@werbinich7908 Gotta learn from the mistakes brother
Yes, when we were teenagers. Not 32.
10 years later this dude is rinsed through the divorce machine by this chick eating tv dinners in a low rent studio apartment whilst she and the 2-3 kids are enjoying the livestyle he worked for....
NONE OF THE KIDS ARE ACTUALLY HIS!
Dudes listen clearly: If a chick does not have kids by the time she is 30 there is something seriously wrong with HER!
100% this chick has spent 16 years riding every hot dude that will give her the time of day whilst treating them all as disposable. She's in shock about her ex cheating on her because her illusion that she could just do whatever she wanted in her prime then marry up the moment she was ready has been shattered by a guy who treated her exactly like she's treated everyone else for over a decade!
Brilliantly put.
very true! good summary, Man!
why not having kids is a problem?
@@lt.2992 Female fertility declines rapidly, most women are driven to desire and pursue children early. If a woman has no kids by 30 and is single she's either baron or brainwashed.
Ryan K I haven’t met a single woman that’s inclined to have children young. All of the ones that had children young where in the wrong circumstances, not even married & now separated from their kids dad, while women I know who waited into later at life (late 20’s & early 30’s) to have kids have a stable relationship, married & have support for their kids.
I think YOU are the one brainwashed.
This was me 12 years ago. One word: NEXT.
Yep. Either a woman likes you or she doesn't.
if you make that much money and you're 32, look for a younger woman bro
Another awesome red pill content, another lesson learned, another beta saved. Keep kicking it Richard.
I had oneitis badly and I mean badly, but then I realised I was starting the conversation 100% of the time, I knew that this wasn't right so I cut her off I invested my time in coding and sports I'm now lighter in weight than I have been in 3 years and gym gone back to sports I have been watching rugby league and football, and been having a really good time
Good for you man, that was smart and healthy, both physically and emotionally of you to do. She would've wasted your time and energy.
@@zipzap1561 true
Never agree to friendship, that’s not congruent with what you really want, you say I’m not interested in friendship and walk away, also long distance is pointless AF. Being on the phone kills attraction, use the phone to set dates, then get the hell off the phone. Scarcity creates value!
This was pure comedy ROFL Rich’s reactions were priceless
If she isn't chasing you, don't waste your time. And, limit your available time to any woman! Find that red pill!!!
Last girl that told me she was confused and still “talking” to a guy other than me, I said “the only man you need is Jesus”
Dawg that’s fucking funny
She dropped him off at his RB&B because she was about to get wrecked by that Alpha she was making out with earlier that night
It's very easy to get caught up in that Disney fantasy world when your starved for love and affection. No such thing as "The One' it's just your turn. And there's no such thing as "Happily Ever After".
Yeah his analogy with the drink was really good, it made me realize everytime this happened to me was 'cause I didn't have much going on at the time
This guy allowed himself to be used as an emotional tampon. Bad form..
I am an Asian man, been a beta for all my life. Thank you rich for this lessons. Been in oneitis with two women for 10 years back to back avoiding other women and spinning plates. I hope I had these valuable lessons when I was in my teens or twenties. It's extremely heart breaking to get of this oneitis and I am gone through lots of pain without taking good care for myself. Actually starting my life from zero now. Thanks again
What I took from this is that she will just use and control you. PROTECT YOUR WEALTH, and run.
remember the3 f's findem fuckem forgetem
I think i was like this sometime back but like the man said " look at her actions not what she says" hard lesson to learn but yeah the moment you don't have her attention move on and chase that excellence rather than women. My two cents on it, but i have been there; believe me i just turned red pilled 3 months ago, so for my entire life i have been blue pilled and let me tell you i got nothing from being the "ideal" man or whatever you want to call it, listen to the people on here. I wish you the best of luck.
Very similar thing happened to me about a year ago. That was when I started to seek answers because she ticked everything and I was desperate to "save" the relationship and she said she was hurt in the past... We kissed. Same story and she broke it off. I did the same thing, talked over 3 hours and the following day.
That's when I saw something is not adding up and found this Red pill stuff, it makes sense now. Well I would have wanted to meet her when I had already been red pilled because now it's probably unlikely because I reduced myself too much.
I had healthier relationships after that one but I broke most of them since I can now see obvious red flags that turned out to be confirmed after spotting them b4 hand.
i would've cut the long phone calls from the get go. the only time you should use the phone is when making plans to meet up
Rich, what we have here is a mini-me version of Elon Musk.
How do u talk for 5 hours on the phone, i cant even stand 30mins.
Anyway this guy is done done.
This is one of Rich's best videos, and this guy's scenario is about 95% accurate to something I recently went through. I had a terrible case of Oneitis for a chick who totally played me, and to make it worse, I allowed her to play me twice. I understand what this guy went through. Oneitis is a debilitating disease that must be avoided at all costs. Thankfully I'm on the mend.
WATCH WHAT SHE DOES, NOT WHAT SHE SAYS. Always.
I feel like this guy has never watched any of your past videos. From the first sentence I was shaking my head, NOOOOOOO!
And he claims he's in the private community
You flew out there for a first date? WHAT THE HELL!!! Haha!!
CooLin1stPlace Too many romantic comedies like Sleepless in Seattle have seeped into some people’s minds (probably subconsciously) and influenced this kind of behavior. This channel is fascinating. I’m a new subscriber.
Wish i would have watched your videos when i was 14-16
Dump her and raise your expectations and your standards. No oneitus.
This almost sounds made up ..it’s so pathetic
Jeeeeeez
You cant be mkre beta than this dude... Smh
It's not though. Happens all the time.
same could be said for any drug addict
trust me IT IS NOT FAKE! bet this guy came from a single mother household as well....
This is a person that is very much wanting a relationship. So much that they come off as desperate. And women will see that right away and tank you.
Damn Rich, a lot of these emails I can't even power through. It's so difficult to listen to some of these. Hopefully your repose sets this man on the right path.
I love these kind of videos Rich! Lots of cringe and a great lesson to learn.😂
He needs to stop chasing women. The letter speaks for itself with statements like "I know I'm a good catch." His whole perception of reality is based on how he is validated by a woman. He needs to concentrate more on self-improvement.
there is no such thing as a LDR and never talk to a woman for 5 hours on the phone or online
I can relate this to on a personal level. Having multiple options is the key, Chicks do it all the time and you should do it too.
I was raised by my mom and she always said women are nuts, the marriage laws will hurt you if your not careful and be carful with the kind of women you be with
facts. my grandma was like who would vote for Hillary i wouldnt even trust a woman to run the country
This is more horrifying than Ted Bundy documentary
🤣😂
Good video. All young men should watch this. It'll prevent reruns for many.
We demand pics of a 20-something blue pulled Rich
In his defense, women will lull you into this behavior as this is the BS they "say" they want from a man. Women try to make you their girlfriend, hence all the BS talking on the phone etc. Sucks this happened, but learn from it bro and never make the mistake again. I dont care how hot she is or what connection you have. ALWAYS stay red pilled. Its a process....
I know it's easy to laugh at him with all the beta behaviors. But I used to be right there with him. I'm just glad I read the rational male at 21. And now see it how it is
HingleMcCringleBerry i think at least 80% have been there. It’s funny because we relate with the beta we were or at least we’re trying not to be.
I'm reading it now
Man, i can only hope homie is brand new to red pill knowledge, because he stepped in several landmines. This was very painful to listen to but a lot of us have been there but Have not stayed there thank God
Sounds very much like an encounter with NPD / Cluster B. Far too simplistic to say he came on too strong.
Every time I think the bar cant get any lower.
... Ma Nigga !!! ... I lmmfao !!! ...
i know that dude is probably not reading the comments here, but I just want to thank him for sharing his experience.
I could relate to him on so many levels, and learned several things not to do - like going 'monk' mode for too long, not wasting time on the phone and meet in person, value your time, and be willing to walk away.
Damn I see my old self in all of this.
As a therapist myself, Rich is correct - The Rational Male should be THE therapy. For ALL men!
Ghost her simp!
Sounds to me like he was just a bad kisser and turned her off. Straight up. She tested with that midnight kiss and didn't enjoy it. Therefore, he's likely lousy in bed with no finesse.
No it's not the Kiss, same story happened to me b4 RP, it's just investing too much too soon and saying things like "I love / like you" when you don't know her enough.
She just doesn't know what to do with all that "love" so she cuts it off.
6 1/2 hours😱?!?!?!?!
What?!?
You’re right I only talk to my friends for five hours😂
There you go!! Validated by a chick!!
Friend Zone = Cost Savings
Just listening to the breakdown was hilarious
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Haha... Dude that was brutally honest... That natural laugh at him was priceless.
This really sucks for men that actually want a partner to be around. I always was there and that kindness was always thought of as a weakness, now putting no time into them gets you all the sex free.
I think it's because if a woman gets little attention from a man (that she's sexually attracted to), she thinks he is being selective and if he's being selective, there must be a good reason for it, e.g. he has something that makes him desirable that allows him to be choosy. Women interpret this as the man having good genes if he can be choosy and they want to compete for a chance at passing these genes on to their offspring. It's built in to them. If you give them too much attention, they'll feel validated but not necessarily sexually attracted. Men become frustrated because they think that if a woman spends time with them, that means they like them. They might, but they also might just like the attention you give them. Be upfront with them so you don't end up wasting your time. Like Rich says, you need to pay attention to their actions to see if they line up with their words.
this guy is the definition of white knight wth lol
Christian environments and therapists are both designed to program men with simp behavior. Avoid both at all costs
"Christian environments"?
I was raised in a church, man. It manufactures blue pills like no other place in society because church in America is so feminized
Wrong. The message in churches historically were used to apply sacrificial values in both women and men towards each other equally. Now the same old message/instruction is being given to men, but they’ve stopped giving the message/instruction to women. Women only get messages of forgiveness for their sins and treated like princesses. It used to be that women were shamed and condemned for not living up to the feminine moral values in church, just like men were also shamed and condemned for not living up to the masculine moral values. Now, men are actually being shamed and condemned even more and over a much wider range of things than they used to be and women don’t even get a slap on the wrist. I majored in history and it’s all bullshit now. It’s heavily unbalanced against men and in favor women even when they are wrong
Interesting. When I dated a religious lady she, and her family, whom I assume had a large part to blame in programming her thought process to think that men should be the sole providers.
I even watched her father clean the house, cook the meals, drive the car, and work while his wife sat at home just organising “stuff” and have chit chat with friends and spend the cash on god knows what.
When I used to speak to my ex about this she said I was abnormal and because I didn’t interact with society I couldn’t differentiate what was normal and abnormal.
I couldn’t believe that she my ex didn’t know how to (or perhaps was lazy to) do household chores.
Before I met her she said that all of her guy friends picked her up and I was the only one that asked to meet halfway or for her to pick me up periodically. Or that we should go Dutch for dinner or lunch dates.
I believe that Christian environments reinforce this thought process. I like a woman who is independent that shows strength in receiving as well as providing and will help to support a cause together for better or worse.
Yeah, the removal of fathers broke the whole system down. Women with daddy issues are prone to be loose
He should of flew over there and manhandled the hell out of her and that was it. She lives in a different state! She's not worth your time. Too many mistakes made with this situation.
ooohhh god this is not blue pill , this is pink pill , but we all did this one day .
DAMN! This boy is a train wreck looking for a highway intersection to happen in. His email is so full of cringe it has to be a joke!
I'd like to think that in the coming months he will begin to wake from his blue-pill beta haze. He needs to continue to immerse himself in your content and your reading suggestions. I have hope for him to continue his journey of self-realization. We were all him at one time - no one is beyond redemption.
Stay strong brothers!
This is exactly why balance is important.. (Too much of anything is never good, even solitude). This guy said "full monk mode" to complete simp (5hrs on the phone??). #2 Should NEVER be with a woman older than you. This guy was projecting his fantasy thinking she felt the same, but that was the inner thirst lying to him.. some guys do this and when they see the results they go back to red pill rage instead of correcting where they made error.
Richard went beast mode on this guy lol
I learned "let's just be friends" is bullshit in high school. After that, I flat out hang up or walk away when they give the friend's zone speech.
This dude's biggest mistake was agreeing to be in the friend zone. I would've just laughed and got out of there.
I'm interested in knowing where the 6.5 hours from meeting to sleeping together number came from. Personal experience or do you have a source?
I think it makes sense. 2-3 dates and then you fuck, at least in the western world.
Dude... recommending Jack Donovan??
Just... No.
The guy is a lifetime homosexual... he can’t help you here. Look up his book called Androphilia: A Manifesto.
Ugh reminded me of when I was young and stupid. The "love conquers all" phase.
I look back and glad that version of me is dead and buried.
Attention is the coin of the realm don't waste your time we have so little of it.
Fucking brutal. Well done. I wish I had this kind of advice when I was in my 20's. Guys have no idea how lucky they are now to have red pill role models.
You can find the right one and make it work -but you've got to seal the deal. At 17 I knew that women who play games need to be left at the curb.
Lmao wow I’m glad you were honest with this dude, he did this shit to himself.
Oof this was brutal. Is there a pill weaker than blue?
I literally feel nauseous hearing this story.
After seeing a few of your videos, I’m telling to my self continually how stupid I was the past 10 years. I’ve been doing this stupid betha shit with all the women that I know. Being the nice guy never helps. Long and funny talks never worked. Thank you my brother for the red pill that you gave me. Mister Richard you are the man!
You're killing me with this...his trying to make something happen that will never happen...this will make him jaded towards women...reality is kicking him in the ass
I just listened to this with my sister and she just couldn't stop laughing and agreeing with most everything you said. Every time you read something he did, she was like "What is he doing, trying to not get laid?!?"
For myself, I couldn't believe he wrote that and didn't see the mountain of red flags telling him that there was nothing there for him. He fell back into his blue-pilled "beta orbiter" habits of listening to what he used to be told about what women want instead of knowing that she wants a guy to fuck. If I've had 2+ dates and there's no sex happening, then it's pretty much over, as far as I'm concerned and I either throw them in the friend zone, or throw them in the ghost zone.
Gee. I'm a woman and the same things happened to me. The same rules apply.. right ?! ;) Right!
"All over her like a fat kid on cake" . Love it!
When you become successful, you will always find some of your friends/relatives hating you for it!
Corey Wayne+Coach Lee+Develop Attraction+Dating Advice+Enterprenuer in car+33secrets=the best combination ever! Watch them guys and you will not be screwed up. No wussy stuff. Thanks to them I dumped my gf as she had no f...en respect whatsoever.
Now she is bombing me with calls and messages I miss I apologise I am not stable... makes me vomit.
As Corey says and I love it: the strongest negotiation position is being able to walk away and MEAN IT!
Good luck my friends. This stuff IS working.
I used to be like that when I was 13
11:43 How to understand women in a nutshell. Remember this moment everyone.
I’m going to buy that fucking soap
That sounds exactly like me when I was training to be a deacon.
I accidentally stumbled into PUA at the time, not long after, when I discovered Bart D Ehrman, I left the Christian faith.
The Red Pill is like dettox for my hardcore Blue Pill Conditioning these days.
I was 18 when I fell for the first and only girl I have till now and I admittedly acted beta because I never knew what women wanted, still managed to do more right than wrong though because I had some idea... But goddamn this, thus shit is beyond pathetic I couldn't even imagine a slightly rowdy 14 year old boy doing this!
"Watch what she does, and not what she says." --- BINGO!
Hahahahahahaaaaa! This guy is ADORABLE!
Fella, if you genuinly have a problem..... with your vagina..... then it’s fine, really. Just focus on your vagina and don’t spread it around to a woman
Awesome hard cold truth, amen! There's no better way to course correct myself than here. Always, before a date, I go check some of Rich's videos. Then I'm ready to roll. Whenever I do this, I'm on fire and on point. Thanks Rich!
Only a true idiot can't escape the friendzone. Don't be friends with her. Problem solved. You don't owe a girl who rejected you anything. Hell, you don't owe any girl anything. Remove her from your life. Thank me later.
Tom Torrero (day game pua): "don't hide your dick." Rian Stone: Don't step on your dick."
90% of game is not fucking up. Women like men.
so wait, you're saying that it's beta behavior not to sleep with a girl right away? have you considered the fact that sleeping with someone before getting to know them can mess up your perception of who they really are? I totally get that his behavior is worthy of getting friendzoned. But also I understand where he's coming from. It's sad that women in this day and age are so quick to take off their clothes for an "alpha" but will friendzone a guy who has intentions to love her and doesn't want to take it too fast. I think this is kind of bad advice in a sense. I mean obviously what he did would be friendzoned, but I question why would women friendzone a guy who wants to take things in the right direction? it's like you're just "alphasplaining" why women like to take their clothes off quickly for a guy who can peak her arousal, but that has nothing to do with a real relationship. I mean divorce is at 60+% for a reason. Maybe how men and women get together is wrong and it needs to change. After all Entrepreneur in cars is a single man in his 40's. Should he really be giving advice on how to fall in love when he's never been able to maintain love? Maybe if you keep your pants on for a siginificant amount of time you will learn more about the kind of person you're talking with.
In the case of the writer of this email, it seems to me like SHE Is actually the one who is still in high school mode for chasing bad boys and willing to sleep with a man the first day she meets him. Or rather it seems like that's what she's used to, and the spiked attraction at the beginning of this interaction was due to her biological clock ticking and maybe seeing that he was different from all the other bad boy losers with shit careers that she's used to sleeping with. Which actually exhibits that she has no self control and makes you wonder how many times she's jumped into bed with guys she went out on dates with. I mean single at 34 just screams that she's been riding the cock carousel for far too long. Yes the guy is naive, but not for the reasons that Entrepreneur in cars is stating. He's actually naive for not understanding that this woman is not a quality female. Entrepreneur in cars is essentially pussy pandering in this case, he's saying that the guy needs to play HER game of sleeping with her to create arousal as if that's necessary for a lasting long term loving relationship. Actually that type of behavior is probably why she's still single at age 34.
Wanna get out of the friendzone? Stop being friends.
Oneitis can be a chronic condition if not caught early...