A week after she broke up with me, she started dating her co-worker (orbiter). Well, a year and a half later, the rebound relationship seems to be going well for them. And, here I am, a year and a half later still single. I’ve accepted this, I’ve done nothing to her or him. I’m just wondering on myself. But it still hurts how she just discarded me after a 3.5 year relationship and we’ve known each other for more than 20yrs. Yea, it hurts still!
Same 3.5 years here. 26 days later she rebounded with my polar-opposite. They are still together 9 months later, while I'm still in a world of pain. Life is cruel.
As soon as you accept that there are better things for you out there, you will release the pain and move on. I understand its hard, but you only suffer because of the meaning you give it. If you actually look at the situation from outside, would you really want a woman who does not choose you? Why would you want someone that does not care about you?
me on the same boat. my ex gf broke up with me after 5 yrs together, and slept with another guy 1 month after the breakup. since then they're doing exactly what we were doing when we still loved each other. remember this: if a person discarded you after such a long time together, do you REALLY think the stuff that happened between you 2 are THAT special? we used to believe in "special" someone, memories, that we cannot replace, but after this breakup i realized: if she can just go out there, pick some random dudes she barely knows, then do exactly what we did in the span of 3 weeks then what we had 5 years together pretty much is NOTHING special, because it can be replaced so easily and effortlessly. knowing this kinda hurts, but it also makes it so much EASIER to move on, because it helps you detach from this person. afterall, what you had with that ex is really NOTHING special at all, if they can replace you so fast! and so, you can also replace them as well, knowing fully well that you didnt lose anything special or any "memories". the actions of your ex after the breakup will dictate the VALUE of your relationship. in this case, it's literally zero. so try to learn and move on from it!
@@halo99yo no idea! Don’t know and don’t really care what’s going on with her. All I can do is live my life and just wish her the best from afar…. 🤷🏻♂️
Would you take her back with someone else's baby? It was not the guys fault bro, she decided to get pregnant as well. Aim higher bro. Don't get stuck there.
the dynamic of the relationship already changed especially with the baby on the way. you’ll be running up and about to get diapers to prove your love. Let it go! Healing to you 🙏🏽
Would be good if you could do one on monkey branching when the ex already lined up another replacement when with you. My ex is already married one year later after a 5 year relationship with me.
We broke up last March and she reached out in December to tell me she isn’t happy in her new relationship and misses me. She moved in with the guy a month after they met and I knew it wasn’t gonna work out. Unfortunately she pulled away, I guess it was after I told her we could talk over coffee about it. Now it’s been two months since I’ve heard from her.
I think I was a rebound. My ex was with his last partner for 18 years. When we met I was under the impression that they had broken up 8 months prior. However, I discovered that he was still talking to his ex and trying to reconcile during the first couple of months after we met. Now, after 4 years together we have broken up and I wonder if his ex is the one he will go back to and not me because I was the rebound. I am so confused. I know my ex still cares about me. He has shown me in so many ways, but when i messaged him to ask if there was a chance we could get back together he did not reply. Complete silence. No response. I feel so devastated. It is like breaking up all over again. Why would he be treating me with such love and care (even though we are not being intimate due to the break up) that I just dont understand. Now I am trying no contact again. I hope it works 😢
Hope you're in a better place now. No contact is mostly for our own benefit as dumpees to heal, focus on our own lives, become better people. It does work for that every time.
Is it considered a rebound if the female dumper moves in with the new boyfriend after around 3 months after a breakup of a 12 year relationship (engaged for 1 year, 3years living together, 8 years of relationship)? I'm desperate to know whether it's maybe a real relationship considering that she may have distanced from within way earlier).
Best advice is to move on. Focus on your life and projects without her in your life. If she comes back you will be the one to decide to take her back or not. Shouldn't be the other way around. Just don't wait for her.
It's still a rebound. That's crazy fast. My bf did the same, met new girl 2 months after we broke up and moving in 6 months later. He desperately wants kids. It doesn't sound healthy
She came back 9 months later after the breakup, seemingly devastated, didn't mention the rebound until I did, I hesitated to meet up but eventually she told me after 5 dates she doesn't want to be in touch anymore, probably because she felt I was passively aggressive about the fact that there was a man in between us - I failed to forgive and she left for good. I went after her, after she left the country and met her with a new man only a four weeks after our last date. She walked past me with him arm in arm. My world crushed. After another three months she had the profile picture with again a new guy. Guess she found someone for life as they have been on a transcontinental trip with parents already. I left her a note saying I want peace and promised I will never contact her again. Since 1.5 years I wish every morning the day to end right in the morning. I will not have the guts to end my life but it feels like my heart getting shredded alive.
My ex did a monkey branch 9 months ago...he has so much work to do that he does not see her often but it also means that there is no room in his mind to miss me.....i feel so depressed...
My ex jumped into a rebound 1 month after our 9yr relationship. They have now been seeing eachother for around 8 months and he has already moved in. Due this 8 month period, my ex has reached out to me on several occasions, then gone cold again. The last time she reached out was around 1 month after we had a discussion about trying agajn. I am not in constant contact with her. I collect our dog to take for walks and her daughter who I raised from the age of 3 as my own is now having sleepovers with my daughter. There isn't any good reason for this as we were in no contact for months prior to this. Please help is this a test.does she want me back, but is unsure due to her trust issue? In my opinion my ex is a FA. Great insightful video .
Thank you for opening up about your experiences and for appreciating the video. Navigating such complex emotional landscapes is never easy, and it's completely normal to feel uncertain. Your focus on self-improvement amidst this is truly admirable. It's essential to prioritize your emotional health, especially when facing mixed signals and uncertain situations. I encourage you to continue taking things one step at a time, focusing on what feels right for you. If you're seeking deeper insights or personal guidance, getting a one-on-one with a professional can be invaluable. Remember, you're not alone in this journey. I'm here to offer support and guidance whenever you need it. Stay strong and keep prioritizing your well-being.
So I have just found out that my friends have messaged not just my ex, but his sister about how he’s made a big mistake and took me for granted. I don’t want my ex to think it was my doing! Best to ignore? Has this ruined my chances?? He’s spending Christmas with his rebound (who he says to his friend he loves and wants to make it work, but lies to me and says he's not seeing anyone 😢)
My ex is in a rebound after being with me for 4 years, we met after a while and he teared up and told me he still loves me and he couldnt love her, he even kissed me , he said he cant breakup with her suddenly because she loves him (they've been together for less than 4 months) and told me if he ever came back to me he will never let me go again and he will propose , he even told me "you're it", but after that nothing happend , it's been one month since this happened , and they're still together and she seems rlly happy on social media sharing quotes that he is the one and they're right for each other , she even beczme friends with his friends and family on instagram and facebook , what does this mean ? are they going to continue to be together ? will it fail eventually? and will he come back ?
@@fer08510i think he was just not sure about her and wanted u as backup and doesn't want u to move on until he is sure so he kinda lied to u but now he is sure
@@shikhasharma-ms3fji always get a notificationthat he visited my linkedin profile , this always happens twice a week , he did it every week until last time was a month ago , he stopped, i didnt do anything , i didnt visit his profile back
similar. owned condo 50/50. sepearted, but not before saying to move out for only a couple weeks. then claimed i was this and that in order to try and take my resources. she got the condo. little while later around her bday she met her rebound, and continued talking to me. we slept together around month 2.5 of sepeartion , her trying to baby trap me. it failed. she blocked me around a month later, and in that time a new guy goes and visits and stays the weekend with her at the condo that was once more than half of mine, and now theyre doing all of the things we used to do together.
my ex gf broke up with me after 5 yrs together, and slept with another guy 1 month after the breakup. since then they're doing exactly what we were doing when we still loved each other. remember this: if a person discarded you after such a long time together, do you REALLY think the stuff that happened between you 2 are THAT special? we used to believe in "special" someone, memories, that we cannot replace, but after this breakup i realized: if she can just go out there, pick some random dudes she barely knows, then do exactly what we did in the span of 3 weeks then what we had 5 years together pretty much is NOTHING special, because it can be replaced so easily and effortlessly. knowing this kinda hurts, but it also makes it so much EASIER to move on, because it helps you detach from this person. afterall, what you had with that ex is really NOTHING special at all, if they can replace you so fast! and so, you can also replace them as well, knowing fully well that you didnt lose anything special or any "memories". the actions of your ex after the breakup will dictate the VALUE of your relationship. in this case, it's literally zero. so try to learn and move on from it!
@@Bloodsport1337 either way, thats a very immature ways to deal with the problem and it shows a lot about her personality. Not to mention that in order to jump into a rebound so fast most likely she has been into that guy for a while now even when our relationship was still a thing. My point is that, it is only worth taking your ex back if they act like a mature person after the breakup: really reflect, focus on themselves, try to actually heal. If they can just jump from one guy to another so quickly, you wouldnt want to take them back. There will be a lot more problems in life and if your partner is just running away from it, eventually YOU will be the one to deal with all the mess they create. Lifes tough enough already, dont make it harder, lol
@@DucAnh263 oh don’t get me wrong I 100% agree with you and I’ve done it myself. I’ve made the mistake of taking back an ex that immediately rebounded multiple times with multiple guys and then was cheated on a few months later with one of said guys. You’re right it’s not worth ever going back to someone like that bc they will absolutely do it again.
A bit confused here, how would someone get an idea whether the rebound is over. Since you're not in their life or are connected on socials. Are there signs?
If the rebound is long distant (ex now lives in another country) so they only see eachother approx twice a month will it last longer/ work out? Will the honeymoon go on forever ? X
@@nieczerwony every forum I’ve seen they are still together. My ex came back and left again and they are still together 9 months later. I just don’t think it will end yanno?
@@jason2723 Well this is emotional issues. Boeing together doesn't mean it's all lillys and roses. They may be together bacause of being afraid of loneliness and other emotional issues.
@@jason2723 I would say so. Until you get yourself and your emotions back together. I like the phrase from Snuff by Slipknot :"It took the death of hope to let you go". This is gr8 song BTW. It's all about emotions. For this reason I don't like when the guy says it's like 3-6 months. It's not about time, but emotional state.
I'm no one's second choice. Nor should you be. when she Realizes her bad decision she can stay gone. That's called karma. Especially after she had sex with someone else. Bye Shallow hearted fool of a snake. Only knows how to use and manipulate.
My ex's rebounds seems to be working.. been gone 8 months, 6months nc and she just although I see her at work and with the rebound at the gym. She just unfriended me on snapchat.. seems random since I've been radio silent for 2 months(she looked at my last story)
A week after she broke up with me, she started dating her co-worker (orbiter). Well, a year and a half later, the rebound relationship seems to be going well for them. And, here I am, a year and a half later still single. I’ve accepted this, I’ve done nothing to her or him. I’m just wondering on myself. But it still hurts how she just discarded me after a 3.5 year relationship and we’ve known each other for more than 20yrs. Yea, it hurts still!
Same 3.5 years here. 26 days later she rebounded with my polar-opposite. They are still together 9 months later, while I'm still in a world of pain. Life is cruel.
As soon as you accept that there are better things for you out there, you will release the pain and move on. I understand its hard, but you only suffer because of the meaning you give it. If you actually look at the situation from outside, would you really want a woman who does not choose you? Why would you want someone that does not care about you?
me on the same boat. my ex gf broke up with me after 5 yrs together, and slept with another guy 1 month after the breakup. since then they're doing exactly what we were doing when we still loved each other. remember this: if a person discarded you after such a long time together, do you REALLY think the stuff that happened between you 2 are THAT special? we used to believe in "special" someone, memories, that we cannot replace, but after this breakup i realized: if she can just go out there, pick some random dudes she barely knows, then do exactly what we did in the span of 3 weeks then what we had 5 years together pretty much is NOTHING special, because it can be replaced so easily and effortlessly. knowing this kinda hurts, but it also makes it so much EASIER to move on, because it helps you detach from this person. afterall, what you had with that ex is really NOTHING special at all, if they can replace you so fast! and so, you can also replace them as well, knowing fully well that you didnt lose anything special or any "memories". the actions of your ex after the breakup will dictate the VALUE of your relationship. in this case, it's literally zero. so try to learn and move on from it!
Wow, any updates?
@@halo99yo no idea! Don’t know and don’t really care what’s going on with her. All I can do is live my life and just wish her the best from afar…. 🤷🏻♂️
My ex got pregnant by the rebound. Shes wanted to come back to me but she knows she cant. She told me shes stuck
Would you take her back with someone else's baby? It was not the guys fault bro, she decided to get pregnant as well. Aim higher bro. Don't get stuck there.
@@rodriguezperalta3212 I can't lie and say I don't miss her. But you're right I have to aim higher. I need to snap out of this mentality
the dynamic of the relationship already changed especially with the baby on the way. you’ll be running up and about to get diapers to prove your love. Let it go! Healing to you 🙏🏽
@@georgemwangi3798 thank you. You're absolutely right
@@reydamaster3update?
One of the best videos i’ve ever seen on the topic called rebound!!!!Much more needed from you sir🎉🎉❤
Would be good if you could do one on monkey branching when the ex already lined up another replacement when with you. My ex is already married one year later after a 5 year relationship with me.
I've done one actually, but I will probably do another one before the end of the year
@@AlexisFriedlander I saw one on monkey branching vs rebound, if you did another please let me know! Thxs
We broke up last March and she reached out in December to tell me she isn’t happy in her new relationship and misses me. She moved in with the guy a month after they met and I knew it wasn’t gonna work out. Unfortunately she pulled away, I guess it was after I told her we could talk over coffee about it. Now it’s been two months since I’ve heard from her.
Which one is the interactive video?
Thank you, Alexis!
I think I was a rebound. My ex was with his last partner for 18 years. When we met I was under the impression that they had broken up 8 months prior. However, I discovered that he was still talking to his ex and trying to reconcile during the first couple of months after we met.
Now, after 4 years together we have broken up and I wonder if his ex is the one he will go back to and not me because I was the rebound.
I am so confused. I know my ex still cares about me. He has shown me in so many ways, but when i messaged him to ask if there was a chance we could get back together he did not reply. Complete silence. No response. I feel so devastated. It is like breaking up all over again.
Why would he be treating me with such love and care (even though we are not being intimate due to the break up) that I just dont understand.
Now I am trying no contact again. I hope it works 😢
Hope you're in a better place now. No contact is mostly for our own benefit as dumpees to heal, focus on our own lives, become better people. It does work for that every time.
Is it considered a rebound if the female dumper moves in with the new boyfriend after around 3 months after a breakup of a 12 year relationship (engaged for 1 year, 3years living together, 8 years of relationship)? I'm desperate to know whether it's maybe a real relationship considering that she may have distanced from within way earlier).
Best advice is to move on. Focus on your life and projects without her in your life. If she comes back you will be the one to decide to take her back or not. Shouldn't be the other way around. Just don't wait for her.
It's still a rebound. That's crazy fast. My bf did the same, met new girl 2 months after we broke up and moving in 6 months later. He desperately wants kids. It doesn't sound healthy
Actually that is a monkeybranch and she was grooming and vetting them while still with you.
She came back 9 months later after the breakup, seemingly devastated, didn't mention the rebound until I did, I hesitated to meet up but eventually she told me after 5 dates she doesn't want to be in touch anymore, probably because she felt I was passively aggressive about the fact that there was a man in between us - I failed to forgive and she left for good. I went after her, after she left the country and met her with a new man only a four weeks after our last date.
She walked past me with him arm in arm. My world crushed. After another three months she had the profile picture with again a new guy.
Guess she found someone for life as they have been on a transcontinental trip with parents already.
I left her a note saying I want peace and promised I will never contact her again.
Since 1.5 years I wish every morning the day to end right in the morning. I will not have the guts to end my life but it feels like my heart getting shredded alive.
Obviously
My ex did a monkey branch 9 months ago...he has so much work to do that he does not see her often but it also means that there is no room in his mind to miss me.....i feel so depressed...
i have a feeling i was her rebound and we lasted 5 years including 11 months of marriage
Excellent advice and video Alexis !! Thank you so much.
Why should they get back with someone that leave them. How is that healthy
My ex jumped into a rebound 1 month after our 9yr relationship. They have now been seeing eachother for around 8 months and he has already moved in.
Due this 8 month period, my ex has reached out to me on several occasions, then gone cold again.
The last time she reached out was around 1 month after we had a discussion about trying agajn. I am not in constant contact with her. I collect our dog to take for walks and her daughter who I raised from the age of 3 as my own is now having sleepovers with my daughter.
There isn't any good reason for this as we were in no contact for months prior to this.
Please help is this a test.does she want me back, but is unsure due to her trust issue?
In my opinion my ex is a FA.
Great insightful video .
Thank you for opening up about your experiences and for appreciating the video. Navigating such complex emotional landscapes is never easy, and it's completely normal to feel uncertain. Your focus on self-improvement amidst this is truly admirable. It's essential to prioritize your emotional health, especially when facing mixed signals and uncertain situations. I encourage you to continue taking things one step at a time, focusing on what feels right for you. If you're seeking deeper insights or personal guidance, getting a one-on-one with a professional can be invaluable. Remember, you're not alone in this journey. I'm here to offer support and guidance whenever you need it. Stay strong and keep prioritizing your well-being.
So I have just found out that my friends have messaged not just my ex, but his sister about how he’s made a big mistake and took me for granted. I don’t want my ex to think it was my doing! Best to ignore? Has this ruined my chances?? He’s spending Christmas with his rebound (who he says to his friend he loves and wants to make it work, but lies to me and says he's not seeing anyone 😢)
not worth it!
My ex is in a rebound after being with me for 4 years, we met after a while and he teared up and told me he still loves me and he couldnt love her, he even kissed me , he said he cant breakup with her suddenly because she loves him (they've been together for less than 4 months) and told me if he ever came back to me he will never let me go again and he will propose , he even told me "you're it", but after that nothing happend , it's been one month since this happened , and they're still together and she seems rlly happy on social media sharing quotes that he is the one and they're right for each other , she even beczme friends with his friends and family on instagram and facebook , what does this mean ? are they going to continue to be together ? will it fail eventually? and will he come back ?
Probably, unfortunately
@@jessp2317 yeah they're still together now , yesterday was our one year post breakup, and they're 10 months together now
@@fer08510i think he was just not sure about her and wanted u as backup and doesn't want u to move on until he is sure so he kinda lied to u but now he is sure
@@shikhasharma-ms3fji always get a notificationthat he visited my linkedin profile , this always happens twice a week , he did it every week until last time was a month ago , he stopped, i didnt do anything , i didnt visit his profile back
@@fer08510he knows you still on his hook! Let him go and he will feel it
What if you see your ex and it actually works since more than 3y?
Does it work the same when they tell you they “mentally checked out” a year before the break up
My ex started a whole relationship while we were still together. Forced me to leave our home and moved the new person the day after I left.
The term is called "Monkey Branching"
similar. owned condo 50/50. sepearted, but not before saying to move out for only a couple weeks. then claimed i was this and that in order to try and take my resources. she got the condo. little while later around her bday she met her rebound, and continued talking to me. we slept together around month 2.5 of sepeartion , her trying to baby trap me. it failed. she blocked me around a month later, and in that time a new guy goes and visits and stays the weekend with her at the condo that was once more than half of mine, and now theyre doing all of the things we used to do together.
I asked for pics of the dogs time to time is that wrong i just like the measages i dont say anything
my ex gf broke up with me after 5 yrs together, and slept with another guy 1 month after the breakup. since then they're doing exactly what we were doing when we still loved each other. remember this: if a person discarded you after such a long time together, do you REALLY think the stuff that happened between you 2 are THAT special? we used to believe in "special" someone, memories, that we cannot replace, but after this breakup i realized: if she can just go out there, pick some random dudes she barely knows, then do exactly what we did in the span of 3 weeks then what we had 5 years together pretty much is NOTHING special, because it can be replaced so easily and effortlessly. knowing this kinda hurts, but it also makes it so much EASIER to move on, because it helps you detach from this person. afterall, what you had with that ex is really NOTHING special at all, if they can replace you so fast! and so, you can also replace them as well, knowing fully well that you didnt lose anything special or any "memories". the actions of your ex after the breakup will dictate the VALUE of your relationship. in this case, it's literally zero. so try to learn and move on from it!
That’s called coping my dude. She’s not replacing you, she’s trying to avoid missing you
@@Bloodsport1337 either way, thats a very immature ways to deal with the problem and it shows a lot about her personality. Not to mention that in order to jump into a rebound so fast most likely she has been into that guy for a while now even when our relationship was still a thing. My point is that, it is only worth taking your ex back if they act like a mature person after the breakup: really reflect, focus on themselves, try to actually heal. If they can just jump from one guy to another so quickly, you wouldnt want to take them back. There will be a lot more problems in life and if your partner is just running away from it, eventually YOU will be the one to deal with all the mess they create. Lifes tough enough already, dont make it harder, lol
@@DucAnh263 oh don’t get me wrong I 100% agree with you and I’ve done it myself. I’ve made the mistake of taking back an ex that immediately rebounded multiple times with multiple guys and then was cheated on a few months later with one of said guys. You’re right it’s not worth ever going back to someone like that bc they will absolutely do it again.
A bit confused here, how would someone get an idea whether the rebound is over. Since you're not in their life or are connected on socials. Are there signs?
They reach out if you’re connection was good enough
But could I ever trust her again.or will she do it again
Be mindful not cautious
In reality they are dating that guy because they cannot live on their own simple
A guy from my girlfriend's college preposed her one week after our break up and she said yes. Is that rebound relationship?
definitely a rebound. Seeking validation and instant gratification. You can’t say yes to someone you barely know
If the rebound is long distant (ex now lives in another country) so they only see eachother approx twice a month will it last longer/ work out? Will the honeymoon go on forever ? X
Any updates?
@@rodriguezperalta3212 over a year on they’re still together
Got together one month after a 12 year marriage
@@annamogg4495 Do you still hope to get her back? Has she reached out to you? You don't want her anymore?
@@rodriguezperalta3212 no I no longer care
@@annamogg4495 great, I wanted to hear that. How long did it take if you got any advice. Did you have kids?
Every ones rebound is working wtf
Everybody? Who says that?
@@nieczerwony every forum I’ve seen they are still together. My ex came back and left again and they are still together 9 months later. I just don’t think it will end yanno?
@@jason2723 Well this is emotional issues. Boeing together doesn't mean it's all lillys and roses.
They may be together bacause of being afraid of loneliness and other emotional issues.
@@nieczerwony I understand. you think the best thing is to stay no contact?
@@jason2723 I would say so. Until you get yourself and your emotions back together.
I like the phrase from Snuff by Slipknot :"It took the death of hope to let you go".
This is gr8 song BTW.
It's all about emotions. For this reason I don't like when the guy says it's like 3-6 months. It's not about time, but emotional state.
I'm no one's second choice. Nor should you be.
when she Realizes her bad decision she can stay gone.
That's called karma.
Especially after she had sex with someone else. Bye
Shallow hearted fool of a snake.
Only knows how to use and manipulate.
My ex's rebounds seems to be working.. been gone 8 months, 6months nc and she just although I see her at work and with the rebound at the gym. She just unfriended me on snapchat.. seems random since I've been radio silent for 2 months(she looked at my last story)