Blue's Dumb History Tales

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  • Опубліковано 16 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,3 тис.

  • @ThatWorks
    @ThatWorks 5 років тому +5105

    You guys rock! Thanks for the shout out! - Matt Stagmer

    • @louthegiantcookie
      @louthegiantcookie 5 років тому +30

      Three days ago? But the video's just been uploaded?

    • @athytrbl3725
      @athytrbl3725 5 років тому +17

      That Works the fuck

    • @romeo7974
      @romeo7974 5 років тому +7

      Wtf

    • @ThatWorks
      @ThatWorks 5 років тому +50

      Don’t you know that a blacksmith is sneakier than a ninja!

    • @GreenTideStudio
      @GreenTideStudio 5 років тому +7

      Ok. what in the fuck

  • @irelandkirkpatrick6872
    @irelandkirkpatrick6872 4 роки тому +3397

    I am now forever using, “not the sharpest knife in the Caesar.”

    • @kevinboyle3104
      @kevinboyle3104 4 роки тому +8

      Ireland Kirkpatrick wonderful

    • @nordicfalcon
      @nordicfalcon 4 роки тому +10

      So glad I’m not the only one

    • @randomsandwichian
      @randomsandwichian 4 роки тому +17

      Still a knife, still in Caesar.

    • @kevinboyle3104
      @kevinboyle3104 4 роки тому +4

      Ian Tan this mind set needs more people participating

    • @nordicfalcon
      @nordicfalcon 4 роки тому +21

      If I ever eat a Caesar salad or Little Caesar’s Pizza, I will now use a knife.
      Waiter: How would you like your food?
      Me: Stabbed.

  • @Zacolyn
    @Zacolyn 4 роки тому +910

    My first thought of elephants dying in the Alps was honestly 'boy the paleontologists who discover those bones after history has been lost are gonna be hella confused'.

    • @jimmygarza8896
      @jimmygarza8896 2 роки тому +84

      Tbf, if evidence of humans are around paleontologists might just realize that we were just that crazy.

    • @thatkidwiththehoodie
      @thatkidwiththehoodie Рік тому +45

      “That’s one weird-ass mammoth…”

    • @aragornweaver160
      @aragornweaver160 8 місяців тому +5

      😂 what I wouldn't give to hear their theories

    • @anonysable
      @anonysable 5 місяців тому

      @@aragornweaver160Truly.

  • @VivaLaDnDLogs
    @VivaLaDnDLogs 3 роки тому +683

    The Empty Fort is literally a DM telling you "it's an ordinary door", and after the party has exhausted half their abilities trying to analyze it, they decide not to risk it and take a different way.

    • @VanNessy97
      @VanNessy97 Рік тому +4

      Nice accidental Critical Role reference

  • @cedilowry78
    @cedilowry78 4 роки тому +2400

    "SMOKE tea. EVERYDAY"

    • @The_Republic_of_Ireland
      @The_Republic_of_Ireland 4 роки тому +58

      Best laugh I've had in years

    • @jeanetten.s.8557
      @jeanetten.s.8557 4 роки тому +93

      I did not expect him to just go *"TEA"* in the middle of that and I spewed my tea out of nose

    • @SamraeDuke
      @SamraeDuke 3 роки тому +14

      This part killed me xD

    • @lordoftheducks332
      @lordoftheducks332 3 роки тому +20

      @@jeanetten.s.8557 you know, people tend to snort drugs, so I guess more than one trend was reversed

    • @OCTBOI
      @OCTBOI 3 роки тому +5

      weed: im done im just done i just cant

  • @arturoaguilar6002
    @arturoaguilar6002 5 років тому +1551

    That General must have thought “This smells like a trap to me. Remember how things ended up that time when the fort was empty and the doors wide open”

    • @Cora.T
      @Cora.T 4 роки тому +211

      It's a good rule of thumb to go by, if someone isn't scared when they should be, they're insane, really capable ( could be strong, smart, etc ) or a combination and there is a chance they could be bluffing. But you know what if I saw someone like Vlad the Impaler laughing by himself when he knew I was coming with an army I'd piss of too

    • @kedabro1957
      @kedabro1957 4 роки тому +50

      The reason this story is probably fake is because generals back then didn't value human life enough not to just send in a small battalion to trigger the ambush.

    • @Cora.T
      @Cora.T 4 роки тому +95

      @@kedabro1957 you can't just assume every general was the same, they're people and there are as many personalities as there are people. Also maybe it wasn't about whether he cared or not, it could have been about statistics maybe he'd come a long way and he couldn't afford to lose any men. Furthermore if it where an ambush like the other story I would not respond to a small battalion that is obviously there to try things out. Remember, these are humans, the same species as you so their range of intelligence is roughly the same as it is now

    • @kairemeriniit
      @kairemeriniit 4 роки тому +52

      @@kedabro1957 A: Scouting parties were really rare in these times (probably because in close combat positions were usually less important than in battle with ranged weapons, so possibility of losing men usually outweighed the gained information). B: If men go in and do not come back it really gives you nothing. You just have less men. There were several types of ambushes with different responses. C: sending in bigger force when city is loaded with oil and main force is outside was the quickest way to total destruction. Fakeness is suspected mostly because the defending general had no reason to be in a town without troops.

    • @jasonblalock4429
      @jasonblalock4429 4 роки тому +110

      In the story (regardless of authenticity) the person behind the zither-playing trap was Zhuge Liang, a master strategist who was well-known for his cunning plans, as well as his tendency to avoid taking risks. So, yeah, his own reputation was part of the bluff. Sima Yi had fought Zhuge Liang repeatedly, and had good reason to fear a trap, so he got psyched out. But if Zhuge Liang had been fighting someone who'd never heard of him, the tactic probably wouldn't have worked.

  • @Grim_Sister
    @Grim_Sister 5 років тому +4797

    Also, Michelangelo was so annoyed with a archbishop that bugged him during his work on the sistine chapel, he drew the bastard in a moral of the hell part.
    Naked.
    With Eden's snake eating his junk.
    When the archbishop came to the pope, fuming with anger, and begging to fix the issue, the pope gave the best excuse I ever heard:
    "As pope, I have power over earth and heaven. However, Michelangelo drew you in hell, which I have no power over."
    Long story short, not his department

    • @tezla6332
      @tezla6332 5 років тому +391

      What a lad

    • @BookWyrmOnAString
      @BookWyrmOnAString 5 років тому +483

      specifically, the archbishop complained about the nudity, thus why Michelangelo drew the (in his opinion) suitably karmic punishment of having his genitals bitten off.

    • @MultiNaruto900
      @MultiNaruto900 5 років тому +382

      *What an absolute power move*

    • @robertdicke7249
      @robertdicke7249 5 років тому +417

      Sounds like this bishop annoyed everyone including his boss.

    • @achanwahn
      @achanwahn 5 років тому +134

      That's a true bro. Shades on and mic dropped.

  • @thehopeofeden597
    @thehopeofeden597 5 років тому +2878

    *"Basic Arithmetic: It's not that hard, I'm just stupid."*
    Blue. You just described my school life.

    • @rachelbrenner4092
      @rachelbrenner4092 5 років тому +39

      Math was just not taught well to me, I just couldn't understand it until Uniersity, when I actually saw practical applications like for sewing and using geometry as an example. My professor helped me understand that Math was everywhere in the natural and artificial. I'm practical and Math to me just was taught theoretically and not practically.

    • @heidiwebster3867
      @heidiwebster3867 5 років тому +12

      @@rachelbrenner4092 When I had questions no one answered me.

    • @agungpriambodo1674
      @agungpriambodo1674 5 років тому +1

      I bet you were a cool kid who don't care about math right

    • @communistpowerranger9629
      @communistpowerranger9629 5 років тому +1

      @@rachelbrenner4092 1000th like

    • @rachelbrenner4092
      @rachelbrenner4092 5 років тому +2

      @@communistpowerranger9629 Cool O get to be 1000th like.

  • @pachutoazumadre32xD
    @pachutoazumadre32xD 5 років тому +4016

    "The sharpest knife in the Caesar"
    I freaking laughed out loud!

    • @sarahleonard7309
      @sarahleonard7309 5 років тому +30

      I laughed so hard I had to stop the video until I could compose myself!

    • @AncientHoplite
      @AncientHoplite 5 років тому +17

      r/boneappletea

    • @mircea_ciobanu
      @mircea_ciobanu 5 років тому +14

      Ancient Hoplite Do you know what that even means? Or am i missing something?

    • @Udontkno7
      @Udontkno7 5 років тому +7

      I cackled

    • @sarahleonard7309
      @sarahleonard7309 5 років тому +16

      Caesar was stabbed to death by multiple assailants.

  • @Spectorwing
    @Spectorwing 4 роки тому +1532

    "so there is this thing called the south sea company"
    Oh God it's extra credit all over again

    • @nateharris9375
      @nateharris9375 4 роки тому +17

      @Aditya vk Ye

    • @darthrevan4933
      @darthrevan4933 4 роки тому +81

      As we all know it was Walpole but don’t worry Bismarck has a plan

    • @JohnZ117
      @JohnZ117 4 роки тому +37

      @@darthrevan4933 And that plan is not be alive yet.

    • @kyle_mk17
      @kyle_mk17 4 роки тому +4

      @Aditya vk yes!

    • @Rainears129
      @Rainears129 4 роки тому +8

      Not enough Walpole

  • @Jenna-hg4uh
    @Jenna-hg4uh 4 роки тому +665

    army: (walks into seemingly empty fort) huh thats-
    dm: okay roll for initiative
    army: why would i--
    army: oh no

  • @ClaireDeLoon
    @ClaireDeLoon 5 років тому +1168

    "Okay so the front gate of the fort is wide open, and you don't see any soldiers inside."
    "I go in."
    "You go in?"
    "Yes."
    "Okay... What's your passive perception?"

    • @Freekymoho
      @Freekymoho 4 роки тому +73

      "I don't go in."

    • @AnimeSunglasses
      @AnimeSunglasses 4 роки тому +66

      ...uh, I rolled a 3, is that bad?
      "Roll for initiative!"
      Ohhhhhhhhh noooooooo!

    • @Revoltine
      @Revoltine 4 роки тому +49

      @@AnimeSunglasses Being pedantic here. If DM asks you for the passive perception stat, that forfeits you from rolling for active perception because that's metagaming.
      Hence no rolling. You either just pass the check or not.

    • @AnimeSunglasses
      @AnimeSunglasses 4 роки тому +11

      @@Revoltine would initiative not still be a separate step?

    • @Pro_Butcher_Amateur_Human
      @Pro_Butcher_Amateur_Human 2 роки тому +11

      I've only DM'd twice, but I asked my players for their passive perception stats before we started, and kept it pinned to my board. If players would notice something without rolling, I then tell them.
      I also pre-wrote several messages as draft texts, for certain planned encounters. "You notice that x is out of place, you look around and spot y" or "you spot dust moving on the floor. There's no breeze, there must be something invisible moving around in the room" stuff like that.
      If only 1 or 2 players would notice something, then I send them that message at the time.
      Prevents the other players from metagaming, and IMO it helps the narrative and mystery. It also surprises the players who didn't notice, when the one player who noticed the enemy sneaking up on them suddenly goes "I spin and fire an arrow behind me!"

  • @HyruleSwordsman94
    @HyruleSwordsman94 5 років тому +437

    I think my favorite little oddity is Henry Morgan leaving England in one ship, and then arriving in Bermuda in a totally different ship. No one knows what happened to the first ship in the intervening time.

    • @timothymclean
      @timothymclean 5 років тому +133

      And I don't blame Morgan for not wanting to explain how he lost an entire ship.

    • @thelinedrive
      @thelinedrive 5 років тому +81

      Cue Jack Sparrow clip: Where’s the ship?

    • @dcbanacek2
      @dcbanacek2 5 років тому +33

      @@thelinedrive Where's the RUM?

    • @Skipsjack
      @Skipsjack 5 років тому +20

      thelinedrive your ship must be hidden behind the Black Pearl

    • @MsPageMistress
      @MsPageMistress 5 років тому +29

      So, not only do we not know what happened to his original ship, but I'm going to assume we don't know where or how he acquired the ship he actually came in?

  • @jamespocelinko104
    @jamespocelinko104 5 років тому +913

    "This last one is the tale of the South Sea Company."
    Anyone who's watched Extra History: Oh, that economic clusterf***k.

    • @pablorepetto2759
      @pablorepetto2759 5 років тому +102

      Spoilers: Walpole did it

    • @erikjohnson5549
      @erikjohnson5549 5 років тому +23

      I did, it was a good series.

    • @PeterGregoryKelly
      @PeterGregoryKelly 5 років тому +12

      Groundhog Day. Redux 21st century.

    • @luisventura7956
      @luisventura7956 5 років тому +21

      It was Walpole.

    • @Rainbowthewindsage
      @Rainbowthewindsage 5 років тому +19

      I watched this first then chanced upon the tale on Extra Credit and went "oh that's what blue was talking about". Also one of my favorite moments in history because I love crafty tricksters/conmen stories (Not that I think Conmen are morally correct in what they do, I just find them interesting)

  • @lavenderotaku2481
    @lavenderotaku2481 4 роки тому +306

    “This is what we call a Grande Oof”
    I freaking C A N T. **Wheezing**

  • @Huy-G-Le
    @Huy-G-Le 5 років тому +2399

    The reaction of people who saw an Actual Unicorn:
    9 Year Old Girl: Oh, it so beautiful, can I pet it.
    17-year-old school nerd: What in the actual fu-
    Australian man: now this is something you don't see every day.
    European in the Renaissance Age: *SPEAr IT, SPEAR IT TO DEATH*

    • @nothingunderthemask
      @nothingunderthemask 4 роки тому +129

      Brony: Ohhhhh..... you from Equestria? What does your cutie mark mean? Etc.

    • @firstcooommment3675
      @firstcooommment3675 4 роки тому +67

      "17-year-old nerd"
      Wait isn't that who I think it is.
      A robot chicken reference

    • @italucenaz
      @italucenaz 4 роки тому +48

      A horse with a horn is not so strange, I wouldn't be so surprised if a saw that if it's not magic, man, the animal kingdom have some crazy design, put a horn on a horse is so basic

    • @nr5076
      @nr5076 4 роки тому +9

      Especially reniance unicorns are very goatie

    • @alecchristiaen4856
      @alecchristiaen4856 4 роки тому +23

      Scotland: mine

  • @dubyaw9511
    @dubyaw9511 5 років тому +578

    Zhuge Liang playing his guitar on an empty fort
    Sima Yi: What are you doing?
    Zhuge Liang: Dance off bro, you and me!
    Sima Yi: ...I'm outta here

    • @vordjoncus
      @vordjoncus 5 років тому +20

      He had to bail before Wonderwall.

    • @natalkumar6132
      @natalkumar6132 5 років тому +3

      If Sima Yi hadn't left , he would have lost his job.

    • @natalkumar6132
      @natalkumar6132 5 років тому +2

      Not cause he would loose but because he would win.

    • @mastertofu
      @mastertofu 4 роки тому +1

      It's not a guitar... it's a zither/guzheng. They are completely different.

    • @charlottemyates629
      @charlottemyates629 4 роки тому +2

      The bard has rolled a natural 20 on his intimidation check.

  • @kiwicraft6901
    @kiwicraft6901 5 років тому +662

    Me, sipping lapsang souchong tea: I wonder what Blue's gonna post about today.
    Blue: No. 5...

  • @kadinriggs6840
    @kadinriggs6840 2 роки тому +38

    I heard a story once about an orc rogue - not exactly a common combination. And this orc didn't invest in dexterity at all, so he was *not* very stealthy. Instead, he *highly* invested in charisma for the purposes of intimidation, and if he was seen while infiltrating a building, he would just shout "YOU DO NOT SEE GROG". This nearly always worked.

  • @ramflight
    @ramflight 4 роки тому +95

    Imagine in 10k years when we've been through a bunch of apocalypses, re-discovered history, and some archeologist digs up elephants in where he/she knows was a mountain range, and be like 'aliens must have placed them there'

  • @Yora21
    @Yora21 5 років тому +661

    - The gate is open, there are no soldiers in sight. This is obviously an ambush!
    - But you know that guy, he's a military genius. If he sets up an ambush it wouldn't be that obvious. He's faking it. Let's attack.
    - But that guy is so smart, he must know that we wouldn't believe that he would set up such an obvious ambush. The real trap must be something else.
    ...
    - Screw this! Let's just leave.

    • @MagusMarquillin
      @MagusMarquillin 5 років тому +65

      But you would have known I'm not a great fool - you would have counted on it! So I can clearly not choose the wine in front of me.

    • @davidswaim8778
      @davidswaim8778 5 років тому +29

      You truly have a dizying intellect

    • @phnexOice
      @phnexOice 5 років тому +30

      Yeah that’s the empty fort strategy (not invented by Zhuge Liang irl, there’s no evidence of him every using it btw) it’s an amazing example of mind games used in warfare, seriously go read about the 3 kingdoms it’s fascinating

    • @LostOneOmega
      @LostOneOmega 5 років тому +16

      Inconceivable!

    • @olgierdvoneverec4135
      @olgierdvoneverec4135 5 років тому +13

      When i hear that story i never think about the guy as a genius, just as some lucky man who had accepted his fate and hoped the enemy to do as little damage as possible.

  • @Antidragon-nl7by
    @Antidragon-nl7by 5 років тому +216

    Regarding #4; most elephants actually died of tuberculosis. It's chilly in the alps (especially during winter) and there's a lot of bare skin with no fur getting wet in the snow.

    • @krankarvolund7771
      @krankarvolund7771 5 років тому +11

      I thouht it was due to the swamps in Italy... anyway the fact is, they died from diseases ^^'
      But, as we see in Zama, elephants don't make a big difference against Romans XD

    • @natalkumar6132
      @natalkumar6132 5 років тому +5

      @@krankarvolund7771 it's psychological

    • @natalkumar6132
      @natalkumar6132 5 років тому +3

      @@krankarvolund7771 plus they didn't because of Scipio

    • @krankarvolund7771
      @krankarvolund7771 5 років тому +4

      @@natalkumar6132 Do I have to cite all the battles where Romans fought elephants? Caesar defeat elephants at Thapsus, Scipio defeat them at Zama. In fact, the only time where Romans had problems with elephants where Heracleus, the first time they encountered them ^^

    • @TheRogueCommand
      @TheRogueCommand 5 років тому +13

      Antidragon 4185 Long story short: taking animals out of their native habitats over several, vastly different biomes is not wise.

  • @abigailcollins8443
    @abigailcollins8443 5 років тому +1027

    highly recommend "Extra History" for more information on the South Sea Company, they spend several episodes on it and it is gloriously hilarious.

    • @gershsgaming8673
      @gershsgaming8673 5 років тому +178

      ...it was Walpole.

    • @Crazael
      @Crazael 5 років тому +101

      @@gershsgaming8673 It's always Walpole.

    • @styrax7280
      @styrax7280 5 років тому +46

      Here's the link: ua-cam.com/video/k1kndKWJKB8/v-deo.html

    • @Rocketboy1313
      @Rocketboy1313 5 років тому +2

      +

    • @shikatsu
      @shikatsu 5 років тому +21

      Walpole!!!!!!

  • @Broadpaw_Fox
    @Broadpaw_Fox 5 років тому +401

    " in conclusion, always max out your charisma stats and thank you for coming to my TED Talk."
    Laughing so hard I can't breathe... I should press charges for assault with a deadly joke. ;)

  • @marjoriewhyte8614
    @marjoriewhyte8614 4 роки тому +383

    Blue: The south sea company
    Extra History viewers: Ah shit, here we go again

    • @thechickenman3713
      @thechickenman3713 4 роки тому +42

      We all know...
      it was walpole

    • @pierreemad2220
      @pierreemad2220 3 роки тому +6

      @@thechickenman3713 can I be given a source so I could understand what the heck is up with that name?

    • @thechickenman3713
      @thechickenman3713 3 роки тому +11

      @@pierreemad2220 watch the whole series if you want the full context but the Walpole thing is in this kne

    • @pierreemad2220
      @pierreemad2220 3 роки тому +7

      @@thechickenman3713series huh? Guess I missed that one. I'll check it out later then

  • @Owen-bk5fc
    @Owen-bk5fc 5 років тому +502

    "the one guy I remember the name of"
    You don't remember Zhuge "invented the wheelbarrow, repeating crossbow, steamed buns, and probably a time machine" Liang? For shame!

    • @ariavachier-lagravech.6910
      @ariavachier-lagravech.6910 4 роки тому +51

      Lol yeah, i am more concerned how he could remember Sima Yi but not the swag lord Zhuge Liang.
      Like Zhuge Liang is much more popular by miles. Sure Sima Yi is awesome and his descendant create Jin Dynasty but still...

    • @corradofigura8136
      @corradofigura8136 4 роки тому +16

      Wait, why do you say probably, that man was a certified time lord

    • @francescolombardi3438
      @francescolombardi3438 4 роки тому +24

      Liu Bei: Well, Liang, I made it. Despite the war going on.
      Zhuge Liang: Ah! My lord Liu Bei! Welcome. I hope you're ready for an unforgettable lunchin!

    • @LiveErrors
      @LiveErrors 4 роки тому +4

      @@corradofigura8136 yet he didnt forsee all his shenanigans pissing his allies off

    • @kalebb1226
      @kalebb1226 3 роки тому +1

      Steamed hams

  • @Obi-Wan_Kenobi
    @Obi-Wan_Kenobi 5 років тому +224

    I like to imagine that the look on the poor Roman guard's face when he saw an army of elephants approaching was the same look the rebels had when they realized they were being attacked by AT-AT on Hoth. There is something universally frighting about a gigantic, grey, 4 legged monster slowly approaching with the intent of killing you and all your friends.

    • @rayanderson5797
      @rayanderson5797 5 років тому +8

      Wait... you weren't there.

    • @Obi-Wan_Kenobi
      @Obi-Wan_Kenobi 5 років тому +24

      @@rayanderson5797 I was standing on the side lines as a Force Ghost.

    • @pablorepetto2759
      @pablorepetto2759 5 років тому +17

      Wait, grey hulking monstrosities, lumbering out from a frozen expanse... are AT-ATs _just_ elephants?

    • @brieanajones4421
      @brieanajones4421 5 років тому

      @@Obi-Wan_Kenobi aQ

    • @firstnamelastname7124
      @firstnamelastname7124 5 років тому

      Hello there

  • @robertwalpole360
    @robertwalpole360 5 років тому +1256

    7:27 So . . . I heard you were talking about the South Sea Company. ;)

  • @wesleypatterson2989
    @wesleypatterson2989 5 років тому +165

    *South Sea bubble pops*
    South Sea Company: "Does anyone else hear boss battle music?"

  • @simonscience5846
    @simonscience5846 5 років тому +390

    "I may not be the sharpest knife in the ceasear"
    Wait why ceas- ohhhhh

    • @lavengale
      @lavengale 4 роки тому +20

      Simon Science Fun fact!
      Dull knives are actually much more painful than sharp ones. Because they don’t cut.
      They’d rip, and they’d tear your skin.
      You would basically need an immediate blood fusion to have a living chance.
      Sure, they are harder to use, but if you’re in that kind of rage, you’ll likely have the strength and stubbornness to do it.
      In conclusion, that actually means you’ve got more weapon smarts than the others.

    • @reyonXIII
      @reyonXIII 4 роки тому +5

      @@lavengale Cue the expected Sheriff Alan Rickman of Nottingham spoon quote

    • @neighborhoodsunbear9838
      @neighborhoodsunbear9838 4 роки тому +2

      SHIZZZAAAA!!!!

  • @PiscesintheRain
    @PiscesintheRain 5 років тому +262

    So, the other guy in #2 was Zhuge Liang. The reason that Sima Yi retreated was that Zhuge Liang was *also* a very well-known and accomplished general and military strategist. So, Sima Yi based his assumption that the setup was a trap on the fact that Zhuge Liang *had set traps like that before*. It probably wouldn't have worked for anyone else. It was a game of "I know that you know who I am and what I do", and Zhuge Liang's bluff was believable because he had the history of out-thinking all of his opponents. Were it any two other generals, it probably wouldn't have worked.
    (Or at least, that's how I've heard the story)

    • @cyberstormalpha789
      @cyberstormalpha789 5 років тому +31

      That's the way I've heard it, too. Had anyone but Zhuge Liang been playing, Sima Yi would have crushed the fort.
      EDIT: And, with what Sima Yi was supposed to have known, it's viewed as the correct decision at the time, too. He couldn't find the ambush, because it wasn't there this time, and Zhuge Liang was known for masterful ambushes.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 5 років тому +18

      It's worth pointing out specifically, FOR THAT TIME AND PLACE...
      Liang and Yi had a history between them, and in other parts of the world and history, other generals have built similarly contentious relationships, probably including a few good bluffs to one side or other...
      The fact is, Liang only pulled this one off to such degree for having built his stalwart reputation ON TOP of whatever history he'd contended with Yi... AND yes, that made accepting defeat and withdrawing was the "correct" decision at the time.
      It's been the "correct" decision in other times as well, and lends to the contentious debates we even see in military and strategy schools today, as to whether there's an effective and academically sound prescription for "smoking out" dubious behavior for bluffing... BUT that, too, is part of the lesson's intent. ;o)

    • @brandontjy
      @brandontjy 5 років тому +21

      gnarth d'arkanen As a Chinese, you’re absolutely right! Sima Yi considered Zhu Ge Liang to be his arch-nemesis (word is still out on whether Liang thought the same); so much so that his frustration over being bested by Zhu Ge Liang eventually caused him to quite literally die of stress [note this is abbreviated. The actual story behind his death is longer and more complicated.]
      Anyway, so Sima Yi, upon seeing what he thought was a blatantly obvious trap on Liang’s part, was so bowled over and intent on [not losing] that he withdrew immediately. Zhu Ge Liang basically won using game theory and psychology that would be applicable to a poker game.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 5 років тому +6

      @@brandontjy, thanks... THAT seemed a bit more like the version I'd learned, but I don't exactly have my copy of ROTK sitting right here-abouts (I'm honestly sorry to say)...
      AND for what it's worth, the point of the story being that once a pattern and relationship can be built, some of that history (even very short term) can also be exploited with the right particular nuance and effort. As you say, "...that would be applicable in a poker game." ;o)

    • @illusmeta631
      @illusmeta631 5 років тому

      PiscesintheRain yep, that’s the one I’ve heard too! Thank you for posting about it :)

  • @aconcernedcommissar6261
    @aconcernedcommissar6261 5 років тому +435

    for my favorite dumb history fact
    was the one of slogans for the 'battle of the grain' in Fascist Italy
    It was that Mussolini promised italians freedom from 'the slavery of foreign bread'

    • @Belodri
      @Belodri 5 років тому +48

      They'd have done so much better if he instead told them about american pizza.

    • @merrittanimation7721
      @merrittanimation7721 5 років тому +76

      @@Belodri
      Italian Populace: "Why do we need to fight against foreign bread? What's so bad about it?"
      Mussolini: *Shows them American pizza*
      Italian Populace: *screams for eternity*

    • @neutronalchemist3241
      @neutronalchemist3241 5 років тому +3

      @@davidegaribaldi1503 Some more durable, as the karkadè (hibiscus tea) in place of tea.

    • @TheDJGrandPa
      @TheDJGrandPa 5 років тому +3

      If you're going for a war economy that's what you want; autarky.

    • @mjbull5156
      @mjbull5156 5 років тому

      He did not have the Roman Republic/Empire's option of conquering the entire Mediterranean Basin.

  • @KawaiiCanadafreememes
    @KawaiiCanadafreememes 5 років тому +332

    Ah, yes, the classical musician Snoopus of Doggus, he truly was ahead of his time

    • @Somedokin
      @Somedokin 5 років тому +4

      Yet the sound clip they played wasn't of Snoop Dogg, it was Nate Dogg.

    • @fathead-zd6zs
      @fathead-zd6zs 5 років тому +3

      And it was actually a Dr. Dre song that featured snoop, nate dogg and kurupt.

    • @apatheticAstronaut
      @apatheticAstronaut 5 років тому +7

      Smokus tobacco every fortnight

    • @agungpriambodo1674
      @agungpriambodo1674 5 років тому

      I bet he's Greek or Roman

  • @zephyr7342
    @zephyr7342 5 років тому +140

    "Always max out your Charisma,"
    Me, who has a character with maxed charisma and finess weapons. "Yesh-"

  • @Sentom23
    @Sentom23 5 років тому +118

    "I don't trust like that" -Hannibal 's elephants

  • @just-a-silly-goofy-guy
    @just-a-silly-goofy-guy 5 років тому +664

    Blue’s -clues-

    • @shybluehope894
      @shybluehope894 5 років тому +7

      I kept thinking that ever time I looked at the title.

  • @gretablackwell495
    @gretablackwell495 5 років тому +62

    “So I may not be the sharpest knife in the Caesar”
    I’m definitely saving that one for later use

  • @davidioanhedges
    @davidioanhedges 5 років тому +254

    Zhuge Liang banking on his reputation... managed to roll 20 natural 20s on intimidation checks ... on the day he didn't bring any dice ... !

    • @eliad6543
      @eliad6543 5 років тому +8

      Fire ships are the best ships!

    • @johnnythreetimes3600
      @johnnythreetimes3600 5 років тому +9

      If the story is true it's also possible that sima yi had always intended to revolt and in order to do that he needed time and control of the army. The Cao family took him off the front lines whenever kongming wasnt around so destroying him wasnt a great idea and the stratagem just gave sima yi the excuse to not attack. Food for thought

    • @phuongNguyen-lj1dr
      @phuongNguyen-lj1dr 4 роки тому +2

      Johnny Three times In the Chinese web drama series" Growling Tiger, Roaring Dragon", this scene played out similarly to your explanation. Sima Yi wanted to kill Kongming but Kongming said that if he's dead, Sima family will be next in the chopping block since the emperor doesn't need Sima Yi anymore. So Sima Yi lets Kongming lives.

  • @silvertheelf
    @silvertheelf 5 років тому +344

    I sat in a castle with open gates and playing a war drum in Ark Survival Evolved with way to much confidence... the enemies didn’t read that story... they thought I had set up an ambush and turned and ran away, I ended up packing up and moving base halfway across the map before they even realized what I had done, 😂

    • @fantasyshadows3207
      @fantasyshadows3207 5 років тому +44

      You sure you’re not Zhu Ge Liang?

    • @jahajesper
      @jahajesper 4 роки тому +40

      @@fantasyshadows3207 reincarnated

    • @jessewillason2064
      @jessewillason2064 4 роки тому +7

      Nice

    • @winsonzhu4427
      @winsonzhu4427 4 роки тому +41

      In that exact same story (or set of stories) the open front gate also happened earlier, which led to an ambush that took out a force with over ten times the manpower as the troops stationed at the fort. The person who turned away from Zhuge Liang's open fort gate while playing an instrument knew his side was already winning and that the only way the opposing side could win was via a bunch of ambushes like that. Zhuge Liang also had a reputation for 1: Incredibly well hidden ambushes and 2: basically never bluffing, so not going into that fort seemed like the safest decision by far.

    • @silvertheelf
      @silvertheelf 4 роки тому +15

      Winson Zhu, see, I don’t play the same tricks twice, at least, not on the same targets, unless the trick is a trick that is simply part of combat with them so much that it’s used in all combat.
      So similar type of person.

  • @paladinleeroy5992
    @paladinleeroy5992 4 роки тому +45

    So, fun fact about Zhugeliang, the guy who played the famous "Empty City" trick as Blue had shown. Essentially, he was betting on that Sima Yi would think that he had something setup for him, because he seriously doesn't have the manpower needed to beat him back, as Sima Yi is essentially his rival/arch enemy.

    • @anna-flora999
      @anna-flora999 2 роки тому +7

      Wasn't part of the trick that it was so obviously a trap that it had to be a bluff, but just before committing to the attack, the nemesis thought "wait, he'd know that it looks like a bluff"

    • @coltonwilliams4153
      @coltonwilliams4153 2 роки тому +6

      @@anna-flora999 And Kongming never bluffed until then. Plus, one of his allies fell for the exact same trick earlier in that war. And, it’s Kongming. Wouldn’t be surprised if he had rigged the city to explode if Sima Yi did call his bluff. He obviously didn’t, or wouldn’t, but when you develop a reputation for extremely effective traps, people tend to start thinking of all the horrible ways they might die in your traps, real or imagined.

  • @Grim_Sister
    @Grim_Sister 5 років тому +164

    I'm not certain if it was the army of Denmark or Lichtenstein, but they went to war with 80 people in their army and came back with 81.

    • @stellaw3620
      @stellaw3620 5 років тому +30

      Lichtenstein I think.

    • @TornaitSuperBird
      @TornaitSuperBird 5 років тому +25

      GrimSister yes, they made a friend!

    • @jasondoe2596
      @jasondoe2596 5 років тому +20

      No idea if it's true, but it has to be Lichtenstein - Denmark is orders of magnitude larger!

    • @pp26026
      @pp26026 5 років тому +7

      Was Lichtenstein in the great war i think

    • @thatoneguynextdoor8794
      @thatoneguynextdoor8794 5 років тому +50

      It was Liechtenstein. The new dude was an Austrian General who decided to leave his country because his parents wanted him to marry a woman he didn't love. His parents wanted a political marriage. But during the Austrian-Prussian War, he was appointed to command over the allied Liechtenstein Force consisting of 80 Soldiers. He found good friends there, and they never saw battle. After the war he sent a messenger telling his superior officer that he fell off a mountain and died. He then went to Liechtenstein with his new friends, where he lived a happy life ever after.
      I am Austrian, and this is a story my Grandmother told me when I was younger. It's kinda funny seeing people in the internet talking about it XD

  • @swarupendranathchakraborty3500
    @swarupendranathchakraborty3500 5 років тому +90

    Umm actually, the chill tea drinking dude (I forgot his name), was actually famous for his trickery and cunning. So, the opponent had reason to be cautious.

    • @weldonwin
      @weldonwin 5 років тому +9

      So, kinda like Archimedes at the siege of Seracus, where he invented a whole load of weapons to defend the city, to the point that all it would take was one roman sailor on a ship, thinking he's seen an old man on the walls and they'd start screaming "Look out, Archimedes is aiming one of his inventions at us" and they start leaping overboard or trying to run away

    • @strategicarchitect869
      @strategicarchitect869 5 років тому +14

      His name was Zhuge Liang who served as Liu Bei's tactician. During the war he was considered the greatest tactician, and he did play on his opponent's weaknesses while using weather and other variables that can affect a battle to his advantage. The guy was no slouch he was VERY intelligent enough to play on his opponent's thinking patterns. And these guys were very much real.

    • @Sinyao
      @Sinyao 5 років тому +6

      Zhuge was definitely cunning, but the stories definitely make him appear smarter than he likely was. It was in reality more likely luck and rumor than anything. Can't help but love the legend though.

  • @TrialByDance
    @TrialByDance 5 років тому +180

    *smoke tea every day*

  • @berylredburrow__8810
    @berylredburrow__8810 3 роки тому +29

    I like to imagine it was this guy's first day, he's put up on this guard tower like "yeah, this should be pretty easy for you, no ones gonna come over the Alps, so just stare at it and I'll come get you when it's time to switch off."
    Then almost immediately, a giant army drives elephants over the mountains.

  • @robbiecotton6827
    @robbiecotton6827 4 роки тому +70

    “Our next story is the south sea company” IT WAS WALPOLE

  • @timothymclean
    @timothymclean 5 років тому +122

    Technically, the South Sea Company _did_ have the right to trade in the South Sea; they were allowed to send one ship to each major port every year. There are two problems with this. One, this is a friggin' _puny_ amount of trade. Two, the people running the trade end of the SSC had no idea what they were doing. They sold _wool._ In _the tropics!_

    • @luigibro2424
      @luigibro2424 5 років тому +12

      Who doesn't love good old English Wool

    • @merrittanimation7721
      @merrittanimation7721 5 років тому +15

      @@luigibro2424 Latin Americans apparently

    • @agihammerthief8953
      @agihammerthief8953 5 років тому +11

      They were also granted a contract for slave trade by the Spanish crown, on a much larger scale. That portion of the company was the most successful of them all, outliving the SSC proper by two decades and trading in almost a hundred ships of people in total. Unsurprising - misery is profit, after all.
      Also, apparently, the one ship a year did turn a nice profit. Not through the goods they openly traded - those were, indeed, useless. Instead, they carried contraband - products on which Spain held a monopoly in its colonies, mostly mundane refined goods that were heavily taxed - and sold them in secret. The profits were kept away from official eyes, of course.

    • @jasondoe2596
      @jasondoe2596 5 років тому +6

      That makes the story even more hilarious... xD

    • @alexanderticonuwu7591
      @alexanderticonuwu7591 5 років тому +17

      @@agihammerthief8953 Guard: What's in the crate?
      Sailor: Wool, sir.
      Guard: In the tropics?
      Sailor: Yes sir, Wool for those cold tropical winter nights and just Wool definitely not illegal contraband.
      Guard : Seems legit carry on.
      Guy : Hey, you got the stuff?
      Sailor : Yeah, here's your scissors.
      Guy : *cuts paper* these are some good scissors.
      Sailors : Yeah now pay up.

  • @midnight_matter8707
    @midnight_matter8707 5 років тому +316

    ... Can you nudge Red to do an episode on "Romance of the Three Kingdoms"? I feel like it's something y'all can both work on...
    ... Thank you and goodnight.

    • @VietTran-po3hd
      @VietTran-po3hd 5 років тому +38

      Have you seen the progress of The Journey to the West? If Red also takes on ROTK, it would be forever until a new video comes out

    • @dropdead234
      @dropdead234 5 років тому +25

      No, we NEED her to finish Journey to The West FIRST.

    • @alexanderticonuwu7591
      @alexanderticonuwu7591 5 років тому +3

      As much as I want this it's too long! They'd probably need several years to finish it.

    • @Mr.LaughingDuck
      @Mr.LaughingDuck 5 років тому +3

      Likely b/c of the upcoming release of "Total War: Three Kingdoms", suddenly within 2 months other history channels have been covering the Three Kingdoms era:
      Oversimplified, Invicta, Extra Credits, and Kings and Generals

    • @agungpriambodo1674
      @agungpriambodo1674 5 років тому

      So she'll draw and Blue will narrate or Red will narrate and Blue will fill in pictures

  • @DonPatch
    @DonPatch 5 років тому +63

    I'm forever imagining Zhuge Liang as a D&D player and surviving because Sima Yi decided not to roll investigate

    • @Sinyao
      @Sinyao 5 років тому +10

      Or rolled terribly all the time.
      "What does a 7 tell me?"
      "You be no idea where you're going, but ooooh, the stars are pretty."

    • @willowarkan2263
      @willowarkan2263 5 років тому +1

      Or roll insight.

  • @endryus4269
    @endryus4269 5 років тому +233

    Some day people are going to think of memes as historical artifacts

    • @LiveErrors
      @LiveErrors 4 роки тому +4

      thats a pretty elevated opinion you have there

    • @aanrrat1354
      @aanrrat1354 3 роки тому +4

      SMOKE tea EVERYDAY

    • @fictionfan0
      @fictionfan0 3 роки тому +1

      @@LiveErrors Is that code for high?

    • @LiveErrors
      @LiveErrors 2 роки тому +1

      @@fictionfan0 no but it could be in this context

    • @StonedtotheBones13
      @StonedtotheBones13 Рік тому

      Idk how to tell you this, but that's technically what they are already

  • @aiden.ambulance
    @aiden.ambulance 4 роки тому +40

    "the sharpest knife in the caeser" i'm definitely stealing that

  • @gekkenhuisje
    @gekkenhuisje 5 років тому +604

    *Sees South Sea Company* Ahah! I knew Walpole was behind making this video!

    • @KP-cb4sy
      @KP-cb4sy 5 років тому +30

      Shame Extra History touched on this beforehand...
      Great tales othewise!

    • @gekkenhuisje
      @gekkenhuisje 5 років тому +63

      The more people that learn about the South Sea Bubble, the better. This way, maybe some more people will find Extra Credits series.

    • @dullahaut329
      @dullahaut329 5 років тому +49

      Walpole. It was Walpole.

    • @joesoef1233
      @joesoef1233 5 років тому +39

      IT WAS WALPOLE

    • @nimsindarinstudios5079
      @nimsindarinstudios5079 5 років тому +25

      There is always a connection to Walpole!

  • @JustinY.
    @JustinY. 5 років тому +489

    This new Blue's clue's reboot looks great!

    • @justaamateur6533
      @justaamateur6533 5 років тому +8

      Go away

    • @jaimebibelot4398
      @jaimebibelot4398 5 років тому +13

      Cool, here at 18 likes!
      Hey Justin Y. are you aware of how many people are coping you? There are factions now, that's how popular you are.

    • @sovietlamar1294
      @sovietlamar1294 5 років тому +1

      YEE T

    • @miam6214
      @miam6214 5 років тому

      Wow i found this very early
      Hi

    • @thelordz33
      @thelordz33 5 років тому +3

      You just now found OSP?

  • @PetrusAdamOfficial
    @PetrusAdamOfficial 5 років тому +174

    my new life motto : it's not that hard, im just stupid.

  • @Pluveus
    @Pluveus 4 роки тому +17

    #2 has an equally/maybe more credible counterpart from the Sengoku Jidai in Japan. It's basically the same story. They've got 15 men to defend a fort, so they start playing the shit out of some big ass drums and they throw the main gate open. The invading army is so scared of the confidence of the defenders that they think there must be a crap ton of people in the fort so they bounce.

  • @phreak811
    @phreak811 5 років тому +8

    Thing to remember about number 2 is that Sima Yi was super smart. He studied the other warlords he was up against and the guy in that empty city was known for ambushing people. It was like his signature move. So when Sima Yi got there and saw his rival sitting on top of the gates drinking tea and chilling he KNEW there was a huge problem and that his rival had a HUGE ambush planed. He promptly retreated because it was the smartest move he had in his mind. Love that story.

  • @ChillyKitty
    @ChillyKitty 5 років тому +53

    "It's not that hard, I'm just stupid."
    same

  • @sophiatalksmusic3588
    @sophiatalksmusic3588 5 років тому +61

    "The sharpest knife in the Caesar"
    SWEET MOTHER OF MESOPOTAMIA BLUE

  • @GustafMedF
    @GustafMedF 5 років тому +261

    How about when Sweden almost declared war on Russia becasue of the clolour of a bridge.

    • @afcreative22
      @afcreative22 5 років тому +42

      Okay I want to hear more about it!

    • @МаксимГригорьев-ъ7ф
      @МаксимГригорьев-ъ7ф 5 років тому +34

      @@afcreative22 count me in, I love me some good historical drama.

    • @yonatanbeer3475
      @yonatanbeer3475 5 років тому +26

      Holy shit, that's gold.

    • @Object-Impermanence-Official
      @Object-Impermanence-Official 5 років тому +23

      I need more information, please, my life depends on this

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 5 років тому +49

      How about that time America declared war on Russia for a hot minute, because the US was angry Russia had stepped out of WWI. There were no battles of note, the small US force sent to Russia just parked themselves in a provincial town and proceeded to spend time drinking and whoring until the "war" was called off.

  • @Aurea0522
    @Aurea0522 4 роки тому +29

    “It’s not that hard I’m just stupid” -Blue
    Cleo sitting in corner : yes , yes you are

  • @megengland9762
    @megengland9762 5 років тому +300

    “Drink [tea] every day” killed me.

    • @Ajehy
      @Ajehy 4 роки тому +10

      Funnily enough, “tea” used to be one of the street names for marijuana.

    • @riyak.7393
      @riyak.7393 2 роки тому +1

      Correction: *smoke tea everyday ;)

  • @freshD1806
    @freshD1806 5 років тому +36

    "Some elephants didn't trust like that"
    But I just want to purchase a fine pachyderm. A friendly elephant, one that talks.

  • @weirdguy7451
    @weirdguy7451 5 років тому +97

    Bandit burning the tea: bRO…… DUDe we gotta…… sELL IT... like *NOW*

  • @rainmanslim4611
    @rainmanslim4611 5 років тому +33

    "I may not be the sharpest knife in the ceasar"
    Love that

  • @cloudypie9466
    @cloudypie9466 4 роки тому +35

    2:37
    "Hello, I would like to buy one of your fine automobiles!"
    "No, I don't trust like that."

  • @dapperparraper860
    @dapperparraper860 5 років тому +50

    6:38 lmao that guy is literally a bard.

  • @gekkenhuisje
    @gekkenhuisje 5 років тому +103

    7:24
    It was
    *_WALPOLE_*

    • @jinjunliu2401
      @jinjunliu2401 5 років тому +10

      ahaha all these extra history people in here 👀

    • @epiendless1128
      @epiendless1128 5 років тому +5

      The odd thing is, Extra History did that 4 years ago, but I only watched it last week. So to me it kinda looked like Blue was jumping on the bandwagon. :-)

    • @robertwalpole360
      @robertwalpole360 5 років тому +3

      It was I, Walpole!

    • @or_gluzman561Peace_IL_PS
      @or_gluzman561Peace_IL_PS 5 років тому

      sure it was

    • @or_gluzman561Peace_IL_PS
      @or_gluzman561Peace_IL_PS 5 років тому

      @@jinjunliu2401 yes yes we are

  • @MasterJunior93
    @MasterJunior93 5 років тому +90

    Blue and Red should start an investigation/education show in this channel where Blue and Red solve the most unsolvable of mysteries in the world: Blue is the handsome detective who is the smartest person in the world but a total ditz with women, while Red voices a devilish red feline who is like Blue's sidekick, however instead of being a kissass, she just roasts Blue every time he has a dumbass moment. it'll be hilarious and if it has to be funded by patreon, of course i'll donate. Just an idea.

    • @cobraglatiator
      @cobraglatiator 5 років тому +5

      omg yes.

    • @matthewegan5281
      @matthewegan5281 5 років тому +20

      I don't agree with the dynamic, they both seem a little too nerdy to make those ideas work, but I do agree with the concept.
      EDIT: meant to say nerdy, autocorrect is mean.

    • @aaronpomerantz8542
      @aaronpomerantz8542 5 років тому +3

      Or... and I'm just making a small suggestion, what if Blue was a blue dog?

    • @dropdead234
      @dropdead234 5 років тому +5

      ...Are you in a safe place? You have claimed the Dark One (yeah, like that demon form she uses isn't REAL) to be a SIDEKICK!? Ouch....

  • @mortemcor3131
    @mortemcor3131 5 років тому +121

    “Because why should history ever be the same?”
    Ha! Take that 6th grade history teacher! I was right! Napoleon DID found America in 132 AD!

    • @edselcervantes6229
      @edselcervantes6229 5 років тому +14

      it wasnt on 132 ad, it was on 131 ad, get your fact right

    • @merrittanimation7721
      @merrittanimation7721 5 років тому +12

      I thought it was Robert Walpole

    • @37robinb
      @37robinb 5 років тому +8

      Remember kids: you should never listen to people with anime picture in prof. Pic.

    • @festethephule7553
      @festethephule7553 5 років тому +4

      @@merrittanimation7721
      It's always Walpole.

    • @lerinn2783
      @lerinn2783 5 років тому +2

      Never not Walpole.

  • @Demogarose
    @Demogarose 4 роки тому +71

    I don't feel bad saying this cuz I know you guys and the EC crew get along:
    Extra Credits has a whole series on the South Sea Bubble that is just FASCINATING to watch and basically spawned a meme all its own (It Was Walpole, everyone)
    Highly recommend

  • @jeanadonohue56
    @jeanadonohue56 5 років тому +6

    You could not have posted this video at a better time. My theory of knowledge class is doing an ‘truth or hoax’ activity where we have to present an event and the class guesses whether or not it really happened. Im gonna use one of these an stump my classmates. Thank you!!!

  • @merrittanimation7721
    @merrittanimation7721 5 років тому +83

    *Sees the South Sea Company*
    Here comes the Extra Credits fans. I know I'm here.

  • @Adventurer32
    @Adventurer32 5 років тому +53

    7:25 "The Tale of the South Sea Company"
    It was Walpole.

    • @robertwalpole360
      @robertwalpole360 5 років тому +5

      You know me too well. ;)

    • @nobodyimportant130
      @nobodyimportant130 4 роки тому +2

      Damn you walpole

    • @koramagna
      @koramagna 4 роки тому +1

      And it was what, 400 years? He's like Darth Maul, he keeps coming back.

    • @Cdre_Satori
      @Cdre_Satori 4 роки тому +1

      Also, remember how British paid the Dutch to keep the last CEO of South Sea company :D sinking even more money into the bubble that already popped

  • @TheWasteOfTime
    @TheWasteOfTime 5 років тому +33

    I think the Romance of the Three Kingdoms story was about Zhuge Liang Kongming who pulled that kind of shit off alot. He pulled off a similar story against Cao Cao, who had just written a book on strategy with Kongming saying "the wise drown in their wisdom" and while being at a tactical disadvantage made attacking him look so appealing that Cao Cao was sure something was up and retreated.
    In another story against Sima Yi, during one of Shu's 100 ill advised attempts at invading Wei, things went bad, Kongming was old as shit and died. However with Sima Yi's army pressing down on them, he gave orders to make it look like he was still alive and again, Sima Yi didn't trust that attacking Shu's forces would be as easy as it looked and it retreated, coining a turn of phrase that "A dead Zhuge (Liang) scares away a living Zhongda (Sima Yi's courtesy name)." To Sima Yi's credit he's recorded as laughing it off and saying something along the lines of that he can predict the living but can't predict the dead.
    I fucking love the Romance of the Three Kingdoms. I believe that in the story, one of the biggest schmucks was Zhang Fei.
    But seriously, I love this channel. I love it as much as I hate Zhang Fei. And that's alot!

    • @M_Chen333
      @M_Chen333 5 років тому +1

      Zhang Fei was frickin' CRAZY, man

    • @adamwu4565
      @adamwu4565 5 років тому +2

      It makes sense he would laugh. The small momentary humiliation is rather inconsequential next to the news that his great rival and the one obstacle between him and final victory was now gone.

    • @fantasyshadows3207
      @fantasyshadows3207 5 років тому

      Zhu Ge Liang
      The Troll of China’s before the internet

  • @theawkwardpotato1973
    @theawkwardpotato1973 5 років тому +40

    0:52 - I can't help but hear "lewding" instead of "looting" even though I'm sure it's supposed to be the latter, and the implications of that - because they're bandits - is not ok.
    ...or was it supposed to be the latter and not just Blue intentionally wanting me to think it was and he's just trolling me like that. Idk. I'm probably thinking too much on this now.

    • @j3011
      @j3011 4 роки тому +3

      The general group of people he's referring to is very much known for looting, so I think that's the intention. But who knows.

  • @TwoGoblinsInATrenchCoat
    @TwoGoblinsInATrenchCoat 5 років тому +12

    "Always max out your charisma stats" is a fantastic moral.

  • @Borderose
    @Borderose 5 років тому +84

    Walpole. He strikes when you least expect him!

    • @andrewvarney5687
      @andrewvarney5687 5 років тому +6

      Don't forget about Bismarck. He always has a plan!!!

    • @robertwalpole360
      @robertwalpole360 5 років тому +12

      Speak my name and I shall appear. ;)

    • @johnblunt6693
      @johnblunt6693 5 років тому +1

      @@robertwalpole360 hey Walpole, leave this comment section to me
      I got u fam

    • @Borderose
      @Borderose 5 років тому +1

      Why let high financial fraud get in the way of a good crusade?

    • @walpol3
      @walpol3 5 років тому

      John Blunt how about... no?

  • @Fellknauel
    @Fellknauel 5 років тому +17

    There was that one time when louix XIV decided to invaded holland. But when he got to holland, they broke the dams and flooded their entire country since it was all below sea levels. So louis, not deterred, doubled back, trekked accross france, and invaded spain instead, because gotta invade SOMETHING
    .

  • @lordmurderkitten6098
    @lordmurderkitten6098 5 років тому +26

    Was watching this with my breakfast tea.
    Smoke tea everyday indeed.

  • @markloveless1001
    @markloveless1001 4 роки тому +9

    Ah, lapsang souchong. I remember getting hooked on it back when I read James Michener's 'Centennial' back in the mid-70's. One of the french fur trappers liked it, as I recall. I haven't had any in years.

  • @seniorpantalones6818
    @seniorpantalones6818 4 роки тому +10

    for story #2, if I remember correctly, there was an important piece of context missing. it doesn't ruin the story or anything but, the person sitting at the top playing music was at the time very well known for being the smartest/best general in china which probably played a role in the enemy retreating. I may be wrong tho because I'm *ahem* "not the sharpest knife in the caesar" (I'm saying that like all the time now btw and there's nothing u can do to stop me)

  • @KhanhNguyen-mh5ec
    @KhanhNguyen-mh5ec 5 років тому +70

    Roman Legionnaire: Hey Claudius, What are those?
    Roman Legionnaire: Oh my god! What is that?!

    • @timothymclean
      @timothymclean 5 років тому +20

      Elephant: "Oh, Ganesh, what are _those?"_

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 5 років тому +11

      DM: Roll initiative.

    • @KhanhNguyen-mh5ec
      @KhanhNguyen-mh5ec 5 років тому +8

      Hannibal: I roll for intimidation. *critical success*
      Roman Legionnaire: Our attack miss! Those monster are coming at us! RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!

    • @maximsavage
      @maximsavage 5 років тому +2

      Roman Centurion: Oooooh, SHIT.

    • @aneesh2115
      @aneesh2115 5 років тому +3

      Rome :where is the surrender button

  • @TheKingKart
    @TheKingKart 5 років тому +70

    Blue deserves as much love as red- come on guys

    • @TheChocoboKid
      @TheChocoboKid 5 років тому +5

      He has Cyan for that.

    • @jvtagle
      @jvtagle 5 років тому +4

      ChocoboKid and the city of Venice

    • @FireflyJuu
      @FireflyJuu 5 років тому +9

      I love them both, I'm just not into history as much as I'm into mythology, despite how much they're related to each other

  • @overlookers
    @overlookers 5 років тому +18

    *Me:* "Oh my God, It's you."
    *Trogdor:* _The Ghost of Christmas Past_

  • @fuzzydunlop7928
    @fuzzydunlop7928 5 років тому +4

    One of my favorites is the guy from ancient Rome who published a book of just cool names for dogs and put in a shout-out to his own pupper so that a part of his dog's memory could live on in history.

  • @cheezemonkeyeater
    @cheezemonkeyeater 3 роки тому +5

    "The moral of the story is that your in for a bad time if regulatory bodies stand to profit from corporate trickery."
    That's a good lesson. I hope we learn it some day.

  • @malikmakileni8856
    @malikmakileni8856 5 років тому +725

    No one:
    Blue: *inserts some history no one knew about*
    (Edit) oH cRaP tHiS iS tHe MoSt lIkEs I’vE eVeR haD ...thanks

    • @timothymclean
      @timothymclean 5 років тому +20

      I knew about _some_ of it. (Extra History did a great series on the South Sea Company.)

    • @countrybluegrass
      @countrybluegrass 5 років тому +10

      If you only knew about the flood of Walpole comments this video is going to get...

    • @FenrirEX
      @FenrirEX 5 років тому

      @Sungindra Setiawan I'm amazed we don't hear about him more in the west. He's crazy good at strategy.

    • @LordRavensong
      @LordRavensong 5 років тому +1

      @@countrybluegrass Walpole? Where?

    • @deamon6681
      @deamon6681 5 років тому

      I'm confused about that comment format, what is that " No one: " supposed to mean?
      Usually the format is used to describe a reaction to something:
      (" A: does something / says something "
      " B: does somehting /says something " )
      But with the " No one: _blank_ " that doesn't work.

  • @noorazraq2245
    @noorazraq2245 5 років тому +27

    Blue: The tale of the South Sea company.
    Me: *sharp intake of breath* It was Walpole.

  • @izzy1221
    @izzy1221 5 років тому +13

    I’m definitely going to use ‘sharpest knife in the Caesar’ forever now.

  • @imacatman8775
    @imacatman8775 5 років тому +24

    Blue with the eric andre quotes 😂 “I don’t trust like that!” I hear you buddy

  • @mojavefry2617
    @mojavefry2617 Рік тому +2

    The guy playing the zither was Zhuge Liang, who was well-known to Sima Yi as they were rivals, and Sima Yi knew Zhuge Liang excelled in crafty strategies, so he didn’t even want to try and test Zhuge Liang’s bluff.

  • @Demolitiondude
    @Demolitiondude 5 років тому +29

    And the TROGDOR strikes in the NNNIIIGGGHHHTTT!!!

  • @thefunnynamehere266
    @thefunnynamehere266 5 років тому +71

    When the sharpest knife in the south sea company is named John
    BLUNT!!!

    • @timothymclean
      @timothymclean 5 років тому +15

      Though sadly for him, there was someone sharper around.
      It was Walpole.

    • @luigibro2424
      @luigibro2424 5 років тому +9

      To be fair Blunt did end up making money off the scheme

    • @weldonwin
      @weldonwin 5 років тому +8

      Director of the Hollow Blade Sword Company

    • @robertwalpole360
      @robertwalpole360 5 років тому +5

      Oh, Blunt. *Pulls out Mjollnir* Come out, come out wherever you are.

  • @underbutlers
    @underbutlers 5 років тому +38

    isn't the a japanese equivalent of #2 during the songoku jidai ?
    Also extra credits has a great series on the south sea company

    • @afcreative22
      @afcreative22 5 років тому +3

      Yup. That's exactly what I thought of too.

    • @weldonwin
      @weldonwin 5 років тому +10

      Yeah, I think it was Tokugowa Iasu, plus about 20 bodyguards, vs a huge army, so they throw open the gates, start banging a drum and basically say "Bring it on scrublords" and the attacking army figured, no one could be that brazen and not have a huge trump card

    • @andrewzhao444
      @andrewzhao444 5 років тому +1

      Almost definitely inspired by the earlier event.

    • @joshuajordan6278
      @joshuajordan6278 5 років тому

      Not only that, extra credits also has an excellent series on the Sengoku Jidai!!!

  • @erichayes8445
    @erichayes8445 4 роки тому +10

    Burned Tea *Exists*
    That Dutch Guy: "I'll take your entire stock"

  • @GuukanKitsune
    @GuukanKitsune 4 роки тому +4

    To be fair, the Chinese general who sat on the gate and scared off an army by sipping tea and playing his music was LEGENDARY for his brilliant and unexpected strategies that could at a moment turn what seemed like a crushing defeat into a total victory.
    The attacking general basically saw who was commanding the defense and immediately assumed something was up... Not realizing the unexpected strategy this time was that there was nothing unexpected to fear. It was a masterful use of psychology and reputation.

  • @net_has
    @net_has 5 років тому +7

    “Sharpest knife in the caesar” is my new favorite phrase

  • @ddd09ish1
    @ddd09ish1 5 років тому +209

    Whoever called charisma a dump stat has never done any math
    I can kill 1 person a turn with a str strength of 20
    I can convince that small 500 woman army of hot tiefling paladins that they should work for me instead of their no good boss woth 20 Charisma

    • @maximsavage
      @maximsavage 5 років тому +29

      The problems with that come when you encounter an angry troll who doesn't speak common and has an entirely different perspective on what constitutes attractiveness. In that scenario, you're gonna want your best pal the 20 STR fighter and your wise mentor the 20 INT Evoker to handle the situation.
      And that, friends, is why adventurers like to travel in balanced parties.

    • @FrostSylph
      @FrostSylph 5 років тому +32

      @@maximsavage sorry what is this you mean when you say "balanced party"? We thought you said "all go damage focused spellcasters" so we did that.

    • @ihaveagun22
      @ihaveagun22 5 років тому +9

      @@FrostSylph only the best comp

    • @dropdead234
      @dropdead234 5 років тому +10

      And with a 20 CON, you can do it all night...

    • @PrincessNinja007
      @PrincessNinja007 5 років тому +10

      And with 25 Cha they'll pay you for it

  • @Spitestar
    @Spitestar 5 років тому +39

    "It was Walpole."
    The crew on Extra History did a video series on the South Sea Bubble. So if anyone's interested, go watch it!

    • @natalkumar6132
      @natalkumar6132 5 років тому

      I see you are a man of good tastes.

    • @lifeontheledgerlines8394
      @lifeontheledgerlines8394 4 роки тому

      That's the name of a town in Massachusetts. Heard the people there are kind of racist or something idk

    • @ibnbattuta7031
      @ibnbattuta7031 4 роки тому +1

      @@lifeontheledgerlines8394
      Walpole was a person,
      and is our lord and savior.

    • @lifeontheledgerlines8394
      @lifeontheledgerlines8394 4 роки тому

      @@ibnbattuta7031 I knew he was a dude, but I don't know anything about him lol

    • @ibnbattuta7031
      @ibnbattuta7031 4 роки тому

      @@lifeontheledgerlines8394 then watch Extra history's videos on the South Sea Bubble.

  • @dairoleon2682
    @dairoleon2682 4 роки тому +8

    That last one sounded like an exploit run by TheSpiffingBrit.

  • @bagesys7227
    @bagesys7227 4 роки тому +9

    "No one matches my practical tactical brilliance!"
    ~China [Lafayette]

    • @reyonXIII
      @reyonXIII 4 роки тому +1

      And that is why Zhuge Liang is the guy people think of among the Three Kingdoms cast when it comes to being the smart guy