You refer to "the rules", for seducation, flirtation, how things changed for you personally and how you met your wife once you learned. Who does one listen to/read for these rules?
Keanu Reeves is a great example of someone who doesn’t need to yell or get out order when explaining himself. He’s always cool, calm, and collected and is highly generous, not only with his money, but his time and attention. He’s definitely someone that young men or just anyone should look up to.
@@Therevolution7 He also lost his pregnant wife and baby to a car accident, and has spent most of his life on a spiritual journey to get over this. As well as his best friend dying at 23 (River Phoenix). You would have to 1.) live a high end actor life and 2.) lose everything (and have to overcome it) to reach his level of spiritual chill. It's very unlikely anyone will be like him; he's in the top .0001 percent OF the top .00001 of people. He's awesome, but...an odd life and a rare gem.
But Keenu Reeves is highly attractive and has had incredible success. it is very hard to introduce into you the type of charisma that Keenu emulates. However, I appreciate him a lot
Keanu Reeves is also very tall and in his youth he was one of the most handsome men. He didn't really have to do anything, women looked at him for 3 seconds and were in love
- do not treat people by stereotypes but get into their world. - powerlessness corrupts more than power - women (and men) want to feel special, important, different - a weak ego (insecurities) is anti-seductive - being dominant is a positive trait - your mother conditions your unconscious desires
As a home schooled I can say my success with women compared to public schoolers is far greater. Human connection is built within us, during school years we gather nothing but insecurities which mess with our built-in perception. As a homeschooler I was primarily focused on my work and hobbies, not many friends, just brothers and sisters to play with. This upbringing has set me up, my flow and conversation is almost effortless, it did take me a couple of years to refine myself in the public world but now social skills combined with concrete personal identity makes me very peculiar compared to regular people. Public school puts filters and resentments on ppl, home school allows kids to find their strengths and weaknesses without societal pressures, which come later on.
@@boethius1812Homeschooling is crapped on by society alot and it is encouraged by the system becoz the public schooling system is the only way that they can get their claws into your child's head and psyche while they are young and tear them down before they get a chance to become strong. Homeschooled kids are often mentally healthier and that's not a co-incidence...
Depends on what your parents are like. In my experience home schooled kids were always hyper sheltered weirdos with god complexes who thought they were so much better and smarter than everyone else
@boethius1812 The opposite is true too. I also did homeschooling. Is saw some children become better equipped socially than the average public school kid, and others become way worse off than a public school kid. It depends on the social opportunities, experiences and social exposure available to the homeschooled kid.
You’ve got to figure in attachment theory; sounds like your family was secure. If you grew up in an alcoholic family, public schools, insane as they are, might have provided moments of true friendship and connection with positive role models
Very important information from Robert for men: Stay calm, breathe, don't yell, don't be violent, be gentle, be generous with a woman, take responsibility for your mistakes and don't blame others.
correction... its an interview, where he just spoke the entire time. People are watching this to hear what robert greene, the guest, has to say@@MSA-uj7cp
@@MSA-uj7cp "That guy" is naive. He should take notes from Mark Laita of Soft White Underbelly and LISTEN. Not steam roll his knowledge on said subject down his guests throat. "That guy" needs to give his guest the attention and respect he deserves. "That guy" doesn't understand the concept of making the guests the "star" of his show.
6:00 People secretly want to be vulnerable 13:00 People secretly want to be seduced 25:50 Women have a sixth sense about insecure men 29:50 Develop observation skills 36:00 Being stingy is anti seductive 39:30 Virtual sex 43:00 Masculine role models 46:00 *Aggression; ambition* 51:00 Channeling testosterone 54:00 Elon Musk; ferocity 1:00:00 Be like water; it can flow or crash 1:05:00 Have an element of “I don’t care” 1:08:00 It’s the mental aspect that makes you a great athlete 1:11:00 Women vs men in seduction 1:27:30 Be in the moment
Generosity VS Nice Guy is the key. My 'nice guy' has an agenda of sex or attention depending on the woman. It's definitely trauma induced from childhood and wanting to make mom and dad happy and to stop fighting. It makes you stingy in so many ways. Whereas when I'm being generous there is no real agenda going on. I just want to be there for the person and give more of myself in that moment rather than being stingy with my energy.
Exactly, being nice is people pleasing action. Kindness not so much generosity but can include it. you don't have to kind to her even. Be kind to others show's her you are kind. If you kind to people who serve you then that intrigues her. The man is nice to her but unkind to others is a red flag.
Whoa, never thought of personifying the "nice guy" part of myself. I'm definitely a people pleaser (also stemming from childhood trauma, yuh) and find myself giving all my energy to everyone except myself. Then I'll feel resentful towards others for not doing the same, but like, that's not fair to them, unrealistic, and just not a healthy way to go about things in general. That's my fault/problem though, not theirs. Whenever I start to feel resentful, I can totally just think the "nice guy" is telling me I should dedicate some time to myself. Thanks for sharing homie
wtf is this world coming to. men (myself included) watching videos to learn how to get girls. the fact that these things even exists and are so popular nowadays tells so much about how f'd up the world is becoming. its basically men trying to learn how to be men because they can't act like one being raised in today's age. because women also don't act like women (they are correlated obviously). just the thought of having kids and what kind of life they're gonna be having scares me
wtf is this world coming to. men (myself included) watching videos to learn how to get girls. the fact that these things even exists and are so popular nowadays tells so much about how f'd up the world is becoming. its basically men trying to learn how to be men because they can't act like one being raised in today's age. because women also don't act like women (they are correlated obviously). just the thought of having kids and what kind of life they're gonna be having scares me
Real talk, bro. Nice guy vibes often come with strings attached. Generosity, on the other hand, no hidden agenda. It's about giving without expecting anything in return. Drop the nice guy act, be genuinely generous - that's where the real power is. Keep it real, no strings attached.
I read the book "art of seduction" and "laws of human nature". Although laws of humans nature does not soley focus on love, It is still paritaly related to seducction. I read them as a last resort when no girl would ever show interest in me. Completion of his books allowed me to understand psychology deeper, however I am still single. I would recomend anyone who is struggling just go out and make some female friends. Reading is not even 20 percent of the answer, I personally would give reading around 5 percent credit if you want to succedd in love or relationships. His other books are far more useful in workplace or business and easier to apply than romance.
You're absolutely correct. Surround yourself with women of all types. Become friends with as many as you can, regardless of their physical attractiveness or whether they're single or not. Not only will you come to understand them better, but you'll become much more confident around them. That makes it far easier to attract romantic partners.
It's most useful when you already have a normal life and are already surrounded by female friends, colleagues etc whom you can practice some of these principles on.
I read "How to win friends and influence people" and immediately I was basically able to get any woman who would give me a chance, e.g. if she'd reply to my messages, was single and in my league, I could get with her. The problem them became about being selective enough to pick a good woman rather than just getting laid or getting a relationship.
In all his podcasts, he interrupts and tells about himself and his problems when he needs to just let the guest talk. He needs to take lessons from his wife and her podcasts
I have a bit of a problem with the whole concept of going out of your way to seduce someone. You are engaging in actions that you would not otherwise do. Actions that are not born out of your own character. You are trying to game the system. It is definitely being fake. But fine, let's say that being fake is good enough for you. How long do you think you can keep the act up before you drop the ball and revert to your real character? Until you are in the relationship? Until you marry? What about the years after that? Isn't it better to be your real self and let the person get attracted to the real you? Isn't that a much bigger win? You can do some self improvement if you don't like yourself, go to the gym, make more money etc., but don't go trying to be someone else.
My interpretation is not to put up a facade, but rather to be focused in your approach and mindful of your actions, and how they are intepreted. You gotta get one foot in the door before you both put on sweatpants and eat a tub of B3n and Jerrys. Also don't be a "nice guy(tm)". Which is actually kind of a crappy facade in a way. Seducing =/= gaming the system unless ya are.
yes 100%. Society also tells men to do all the chasing. And that we need external things to be good enough. Thats why people chase money or exhausting careers. We literally contribute to woman's favor instead of being stoic and let them come to us. Which from experience works a lot better then the opposite.
@@patrickmahon3476 To be fair this video teaches some things that we are doing wrong and should fix, that are not part of your character identity. The world is nuanced. But overall I think the whole premise of the video is wrong.
I wasn't sure if I'd like this based on the title, knowing it could go so many ways, but Robert Greene is great. I love hearing about the why. Very informative and clicks any missing pieces into place.
I am highly present with you in what you are saying. Totally into what you are saying, getting to know you deeply... I am slightly dangerous, and very resourceful.... 😋
Yea we've always wanted the pretty boys since our teens. Guys don't know the power of a handsome man to us. Gets the oxytocin going not the sexual stimulation men get by visual. The infatuation hormone is super strong. Look at how girls scream for BTS or boy bands that's oxytocin. Look how hypnotized men are at strip clubs, it's a diff hormone reaction.
Attractive physically? Ive seen a lot of successful, confident men with game who arent the best looking get with woman who are better looking than them.
33:14 Spot on what Robert is saying here. That is what we will think in a situation like that because All women regardless of how confident some may be, we still have this insecurity and this fear of rejection. That is what I would feel immediately in that situation when a man says lets not go any further. I would actually cry thinking he saw my fat rolls and wants to go home. Haha.
That was a very insightful conversation. Specially I connected to the lines: fear of no loss, specially when you talking to your type of woman. Also the part you have to be present in the moment with your heart. Find myself often follow my script. Thanks for all the value both of you.
Not fearing loss means moving on when rejected. Not stalking, harassing, obsessing over her in any shape or form, contacting people asking about her or ruining her life, social life, career, decision to move, love life, etc. that’s not cool, calm and collected. It’s the opposite. It’s brash, psychotic, jealous, bitter and insecure. The longer you do it, the more bitter you are.
"You need to know when to disappear for a week so they know they can't take you for granted". "Everyone secretly wants to be vulnerable." So... gain trust, then cynically manipulate. Great way to create lasting connection.
Follow this garbage at your own peril. He’s right about everything he’s right about mystery and seduction. His advice will definitely get you laid. And in the morning, when you are not able to be her fantasy into the next day, when you have to go back to work when you have to return to your real life, when the responsibilities rise with the sun to dissolve your fantasy island, she will destroy you.
1:01:04 "meek" It doesn't mean "weak" it's more like "trained" or "disciplined" similar to "cooperative/ controllable by its master" To illustrate: a MEEK horse is still strong to carry loads and people. But it is rideable and can be steered by a rider. Same case with police dogs. They are meeked but not weak. #tamed
Yes! Tom nailed it. Woman do want to feel they are the only one that their man wants, desires, and cant contain his strong desire for her, but only for her.
What is interesting about this conversation is that it's aaaaall about the woman and what THEY want. No one is asking or is interested in what men want, who cares right? It's all about the women women women 24/7. Men have fantasies too men have needs too men also have certain things they like that they want to see. If my needs are not met and no one cares about what I want as man then why should I care about what the woman wants?
Well done.I appreciate your advice. The discussion about office dynamics is so true. All I can say is well said and all I advise is look at your own integrity and at the same time do not let yourselves people to get used ( look at this closely) You probably/ likely be deeply hurt in so many ways however don't perpetuate that hurt.
Peace through strength. Forge your body and skills, but most importantly, your will to act when it is absolutely necessary, but the best fight or battle is the one that never took place. Using the brain is the most important tool and weapon...keep it all sharp!
Great video. I don’t enjoy when people who have never been to war speak on it. War is like football? I’ve done both and they couldn’t be more far apart. Stick to what you know brother. Both of you are smarter than I am by far. Neither of you are warriors.
I think perhaps you might havectaken that comparison too literally. My suggestion is that they were referring to strategy in that strategy is applicable to both scenarios.
Football is a lot like war. Or rather, it's a proxy for it. It allows you to execute plans with teammates against another team of males. It requires strength, skill, and courage, and it's relentless in its rules. I've never been to war, and I can't speak on the terror, shock of reality opening up before you, the depth of being forced to make choices that shake your whole self, the darkness and inescapability. There's not much of that in football. But football allows you to determine who might be good in a war, and having a sorting hat for mate quality, without a bunch of your males dying. So goes the theory.
I didn't watch the video to be honest. I do think you have a point. The subject of women shouldn't be compared to war or football in anyway. Men are the reason both(football/war) happen. Men also are the only ones playing or fighting. These guys are trying to be part of the groups trying to create better men for women. Why? Women are suppose to support their men in general. Pretty simple concept. Men must respect the women WHILE women support and respect men. It's all changed now. Women are entitled and spoiled. How can you change that. If men are basically still the same.🤷♂️. In general of course.
30:35 immediately made me click the like button cuz bro...he started speaking some real truth...but so far this has been a great podcast...im watching it while i do my workout. so imma get back to my workout and get back to listen to this.. much love to yall
I pretended to be what a woman wanted but then realized I didn't want to continue pretending. So for "sincere" people this is very problematic, there being a world full of non-realistic women whereas most men are more realistic and sincere, less prone to fantasies and not wanting a life of pretense.
8 to 20 burpees without push-ups with or without jump or more. 10 to 20 goblet squats or more 10 to 20 romanian deadlifts or more 3x 10 to 20 180 degree jumps or more 10 to 20 push-ups or dumbell bench press or more 10 to 20 back rows 3x 30 to 60 jumping jacks or more 10 to 20 bicep curls or more 10 to 20 shoulder presses or more 3x 30 situps or more 3x Run 1/4 mile or more 4x Mix and match
I think of myself as a nice guy, and I know it came from my childhood because my mother showed love toward me if I was a nice boy. So now, as an adult, I'm always nice to others because I want them to like me, and most of the time, I get hurt and feel being used by others.
Tom needs to stop injecting what he thinks about the subject and instead draw out Greene. Tom made an interviewer's biggest mistake at the beginning of this interview but did get better as it continued.
Over competition is actually weak but the internalised David Goggin’s approach is an option. Keep your pain to yourself and always remember the strong, intelligent, shape-shifter Tortoise is always accruing good energies in the Spiritual Universe.
Tom is great here. Robert is also great. If you are a man that needs help with women ( like 99 percent) watch this because this information is the beginning of understanding how to be successful with women. Forget about the past.
When a fighter invites a wizard to a philosophical discussion, both have distinctly different ways of understanding reality and/or and solving problems.
Generosity, a confidence from not being insecure, calm coolness, bring an aura that you respect their qualities, differences, and uniqueness...Plus, pay attention, know when humor, compliments, and empathy can be useful......Genuine gentleman get the key to the lock box... "I gotta write this shit down'......
At the risk of being offensive. I'd rather be lectured to in this subject by a woman, not a man. Just like I would switch off listening to a woman telling me how a man thinks.
@@crushinnihilism that's pretty much exactly what I thought, so I was interested in why the original commenter had a different perspective ... Anyway, thanks for answering! :)
When you spoke of fear, my bet is fear of rejection, failure, creepiness, openness, etc. at the onset. Not the fear of the power someone has over you. Anecdotal because I've never felt that, although I do tend to slip on healthy distance after the act so perhaps a different manifestation of the same (that has ended a couple of good things over the years). Our society gives alternatives to the list I mentioned at the start and punishes them readily. I think younger generations have become so constricted by culture it has become a failure to act - just a guess.
As an editor of romance novels (and as a woman), I can tell you women want to be heard, seen, and prioritized. Women are attracted to men that display some “dangerous” qualities because it shows the ability to protect. The only problem women have with a nice guy is that he doesn’t show that he’s willing (and able)to step up for her should she ever need him to (not always in a physical fight, but say, if his mother is giving her a hard time, he’s willing to step in and say hey you can’t talk to my wife/girlfriend/whatever like that). The advice this guy gave about nice guys was BAD and will backfire. Going back and forth between nice and unavailable (“make her want it”) is going to confuse her about your interest and make her think you’re either using her or not really attracted to her. Women want to be chased. Especially by a man who isn’t shy about his interest; Don’t make her guess. Want to know why women want to be with the bad boy instead of the good guy? The good guy will sacrifice her to save the world. The bad guy will sacrifice the world to save her. Women want to be valued like that.
How do you balance this mindset you're describing with behaviors like simping and over investment being a turn off? A big problem with Nice Guys is that they'll value a woman for more than the world, they'll value her above themselves. They are pros at setting women on a pedestal while setting the bar for what they get back too low. What's healthy about that? Also think your analogy is incomplete, the full thing looks more like: "A good guy may sacrifice her to save the world, but he will also sacrifice himself to save her. A bad guy may sacrifice the world to save her, but he will also sacrifice her to save himself."
@@TheNynax I like your analogy better lol. That’s probably about right in the real world. My original analogy is just a saying in the romance writing world to express that the hero deeply loves the heroine. I think there’s a difference between being a nice guy and a clingy doormat stemming from insecurity with no boundary enforcement. And as someone who used to be exactly like that, that goes for women too. Healthy communication about what everyone wants and boundaries that are respected is key. People can be nice without encouraging others to take advantage of them (I did this for years and it was awful but he turned into my dream man when I started communicating my boundaries. Just my personal experience).
People pleasing can be a sign of complex/childhood trauma as part of the fight-flight-freeze-fawn response. Fawning, being overly nice to protect one's self from a perceived threat, making sure you're 'being good' to avoid the pain of a parent who is likely highly critical/abusive. Anticipating their needs and fulfilling them to be safe. A deep seated pattern that once you understand its origins, you can begin to amend your behaviour to better or improved reactions to people around you.
I’m a woman and haven’t watched/listened to this (might just out of curiosity) and maybe I’m different from other women in this regard, but I think respectfulness is so underrated. Men might be surprised just how far being genuinely and consistently respectful of the women you’re pursuing, combined with being self-respecting, will get you. Though it won’t help if it’s empty behavior-mimicking you adopt temporarily in pursuit of a self-serving agenda. Someone in the comments section mentioned that this video encourages males dominance. I’d say nix that and replace it with respectful confidence. FWIW.
You are right in the context of a long term relationship, but in the video they are talking specifically at what actually causes attraction, and the study of sexual fantasies in a lot of data points.
@Axel Axe not sure why YT wouldn’t let me reply to you directly. But I actually meant that even more so in the context of a fling! A man who’s sweet, trustworthy, and respectful of me and my desires would be the one I’d most likely explore crazy and not-so-crazy physical things with, even if I wouldn’t romantically date him, and even if I wasn’t super attracted to him. But combine those characteristics with confidence, and there’s almost no way I wouldn’t be attracted to him. Whereas in a serious romantic partner I’d look for a lot more than that - chemistry, common interests and values and goals, etc. But again, that’s me. Generalizing about women is probably the biggest error. We’re all so different.
@@calexprenas it’s true that generalizing is not the best thing. The problem is that most women are different from you and that’s why it makes it difficult. I believe we need to be who we are and act in accordance to our identity. If that is attractive or not to someone specifically I honestly don’t care. I rather be kind and sweet than be a “bad boy”
Seduction that works on anyone: be as there for the person as much as their mother would be, or the ideal mother would be; be mysterious and give them the ability to slowly solve you, the mystery, on their own. Be highly, highly interested in this person. It works particularly well if your interest in them seems illogical to them. Don't get so carried away that you become an actual stalker, of course. It's like stalking comfortably and carefully. Be incredibly unselfish and let them come to you, especially if the person is male. Men need to be kept in the masculine role or the seduction won't work. It means wait for them to call you and respond every time just as his mother would. She's the woman you will always be competing with.
we stalk each other and fantasize but never really bring it up in our friendship because she knows i have ALOT of work to do but she sticking and believing in me 🎉
Been there.... It's an elusion,(not really the woman you want to invest in) basically to get caught up in attraction to what you think will fulfill your soul, you are risking losing your soul. Sex needs intamacy, so you need trust, vulnerability in order to connect at a non physical level.
WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!
Two guys discussing a woman's sexual fantasy....
Could you not find two women for the panel?
My wife is crazy and I f'n hate it.
@@dtsai Divorce her
You refer to "the rules", for seducation, flirtation, how things changed for you personally and how you met your wife once you learned. Who does one listen to/read for these rules?
I DONT THINK U HATED CAUSE IF YOU DO YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN GONE LONG AGO
@@dtsai
Keanu Reeves is a great example of someone who doesn’t need to yell or get out order when explaining himself. He’s always cool, calm, and collected and is highly generous, not only with his money, but his time and attention. He’s definitely someone that young men or just anyone should look up to.
Hes also a goodlooking, tall multimillionaire.
He has $300 million
@@Therevolution7 He also lost his pregnant wife and baby to a car accident, and has spent most of his life on a spiritual journey to get over this. As well as his best friend dying at 23 (River Phoenix). You would have to 1.) live a high end actor life and 2.) lose everything (and have to overcome it) to reach his level of spiritual chill. It's very unlikely anyone will be like him; he's in the top .0001 percent OF the top .00001 of people. He's awesome, but...an odd life and a rare gem.
But Keenu Reeves is highly attractive and has had incredible success. it is very hard to introduce into you the type of charisma that Keenu emulates. However, I appreciate him a lot
Keanu Reeves is also very tall and in his youth he was one of the most handsome men. He didn't really have to do anything, women looked at him for 3 seconds and were in love
- do not treat people by stereotypes but get into their world.
- powerlessness corrupts more than power
- women (and men) want to feel special, important, different
- a weak ego (insecurities) is anti-seductive
- being dominant is a positive trait
- your mother conditions your unconscious desires
As a home schooled I can say my success with women compared to public schoolers is far greater. Human connection is built within us, during school years we gather nothing but insecurities which mess with our built-in perception. As a homeschooler I was primarily focused on my work and hobbies, not many friends, just brothers and sisters to play with. This upbringing has set me up, my flow and conversation is almost effortless, it did take me a couple of years to refine myself in the public world but now social skills combined with concrete personal identity makes me very peculiar compared to regular people. Public school puts filters and resentments on ppl, home school allows kids to find their strengths and weaknesses without societal pressures, which come later on.
Interesting perspective. I thought the opposite, but you make sense. Public school was a psychological and physical warzone, at times.
@@boethius1812Homeschooling is crapped on by society alot and it is encouraged by the system becoz the public schooling system is the only way that they can get their claws into your child's head and psyche while they are young and tear them down before they get a chance to become strong.
Homeschooled kids are often mentally healthier and that's not a co-incidence...
Depends on what your parents are like. In my experience home schooled kids were always hyper sheltered weirdos with god complexes who thought they were so much better and smarter than everyone else
@boethius1812 The opposite is true too. I also did homeschooling. Is saw some children become better equipped socially than the average public school kid, and others become way worse off than a public school kid. It depends on the social opportunities, experiences and social exposure available to the homeschooled kid.
You’ve got to figure in attachment theory; sounds like your family was secure. If you grew up in an alcoholic family, public schools, insane as they are, might have provided moments of true friendship and connection with positive role models
Very important information from Robert for men: Stay calm, breathe, don't yell, don't be violent, be gentle, be generous with a woman, take responsibility for your mistakes and don't blame others.
Also be able to read if you're dealing with an abusive passive aggressive covert narcissist.
@@sednasix6608 What do you mean with that?
Say no, never accomodate and never be a nice guy
@@ashwinashwin3663 Good luck then.
Sounds like you got half of it.
I would definitely watch a 5h podcast if Robert Greene is the one talking.
Robert is a national treasure.
Same lol
I think it's nice time from time to hear the host's thoughts too. It is a conversation afterall
Robert is so interesting and good at explaining hard things in a gentle way
Looks like this guy wanted to interview himself with Robert. He literally did
"this guy" owns this huge platform and is having a discussion with RB
correction... its an interview, where he just spoke the entire time. People are watching this to hear what robert greene, the guest, has to say@@MSA-uj7cp
@@MSA-uj7cpTom, is that you?
@@MSA-uj7cp "That guy" is naive. He should take notes from Mark Laita of Soft White Underbelly and LISTEN. Not steam roll his knowledge on said subject down his guests throat. "That guy" needs to give his guest the attention and respect he deserves. "That guy" doesn't understand the concept of making the guests the "star" of his show.
He always does.
6:00 People secretly want to be vulnerable
13:00 People secretly want to be seduced
25:50 Women have a sixth sense about insecure men
29:50 Develop observation skills
36:00 Being stingy is anti seductive
39:30 Virtual sex
43:00 Masculine role models
46:00 *Aggression; ambition*
51:00 Channeling testosterone
54:00 Elon Musk; ferocity
1:00:00 Be like water; it can flow or crash
1:05:00 Have an element of “I don’t care”
1:08:00 It’s the mental aspect that makes you a great athlete
1:11:00 Women vs men in seduction
1:27:30 Be in the moment
I will do 1 pushup for each like this comments get...
When?
I can do 33 push-ups in a single rep.
Whew.
I did 30 in 1 push up
Was push-ups mentioned in the interview?
@@jackslater8688 you have to watch it. No cheating you sneaky dog
Generosity VS Nice Guy is the key. My 'nice guy' has an agenda of sex or attention depending on the woman. It's definitely trauma induced from childhood and wanting to make mom and dad happy and to stop fighting. It makes you stingy in so many ways. Whereas when I'm being generous there is no real agenda going on. I just want to be there for the person and give more of myself in that moment rather than being stingy with my energy.
Exactly, being nice is people pleasing action. Kindness not so much generosity but can include it. you don't have to kind to her even. Be kind to others show's her you are kind. If you kind to people who serve you then that intrigues her. The man is nice to her but unkind to others is a red flag.
Whoa, never thought of personifying the "nice guy" part of myself. I'm definitely a people pleaser (also stemming from childhood trauma, yuh) and find myself giving all my energy to everyone except myself. Then I'll feel resentful towards others for not doing the same, but like, that's not fair to them, unrealistic, and just not a healthy way to go about things in general. That's my fault/problem though, not theirs. Whenever I start to feel resentful, I can totally just think the "nice guy" is telling me I should dedicate some time to myself.
Thanks for sharing homie
wtf is this world coming to. men (myself included) watching videos to learn how to get girls. the fact that these things even exists and are so popular nowadays tells so much about how f'd up the world is becoming. its basically men trying to learn how to be men because they can't act like one being raised in today's age. because women also don't act like women (they are correlated obviously). just the thought of having kids and what kind of life they're gonna be having scares me
wtf is this world coming to. men (myself included) watching videos to learn how to get girls. the fact that these things even exists and are so popular nowadays tells so much about how f'd up the world is becoming. its basically men trying to learn how to be men because they can't act like one being raised in today's age. because women also don't act like women (they are correlated obviously). just the thought of having kids and what kind of life they're gonna be having scares me
Real talk, bro. Nice guy vibes often come with strings attached. Generosity, on the other hand, no hidden agenda. It's about giving without expecting anything in return. Drop the nice guy act, be genuinely generous - that's where the real power is. Keep it real, no strings attached.
I read the book "art of seduction" and "laws of human nature". Although laws of humans nature does not soley focus on love, It is still paritaly related to seducction. I read them as a last resort when no girl would ever show interest in me. Completion of his books allowed me to understand psychology deeper, however I am still single. I would recomend anyone who is struggling just go out and make some female friends. Reading is not even 20 percent of the answer, I personally would give reading around 5 percent credit if you want to succedd in love or relationships. His other books are far more useful in workplace or business and easier to apply than romance.
You're absolutely correct. Surround yourself with women of all types. Become friends with as many as you can, regardless of their physical attractiveness or whether they're single or not. Not only will you come to understand them better, but you'll become much more confident around them. That makes it far easier to attract romantic partners.
It's most useful when you already have a normal life and are already surrounded by female friends, colleagues etc whom you can practice some of these principles on.
After reading the book, I now get more ass than a toilet seat.
Everything has to be natural, there's no point reading a book and following rule by rule because it won't seem natural, Robert already said that
I read "How to win friends and influence people" and immediately I was basically able to get any woman who would give me a chance, e.g. if she'd reply to my messages, was single and in my league, I could get with her. The problem them became about being selective enough to pick a good woman rather than just getting laid or getting a relationship.
Tom Talks too much about himself and how he has mastered it all.
TRUTH‼️… and clearly he hasn’t mastered it!
Noticed this too. To me, Tom’s talking about himself is him highlighting his insecurities
Well I mean he cultivates looking like a roadie for a butt rock band.
Yep, noticing that too, as well as him mentioning ON EVERY PODCAST of his, I've listened too, about how" MUCH MONEY I HAVE!"
In all his podcasts, he interrupts and tells about himself and his problems when he needs to just let the guest talk. He needs to take lessons from his wife and her podcasts
I have a bit of a problem with the whole concept of going out of your way to seduce someone. You are engaging in actions that you would not otherwise do. Actions that are not born out of your own character. You are trying to game the system. It is definitely being fake. But fine, let's say that being fake is good enough for you. How long do you think you can keep the act up before you drop the ball and revert to your real character? Until you are in the relationship? Until you marry? What about the years after that? Isn't it better to be your real self and let the person get attracted to the real you? Isn't that a much bigger win? You can do some self improvement if you don't like yourself, go to the gym, make more money etc., but don't go trying to be someone else.
My interpretation is not to put up a facade, but rather to be focused in your approach and mindful of your actions, and how they are intepreted. You gotta get one foot in the door before you both put on sweatpants and eat a tub of B3n and Jerrys. Also don't be a "nice guy(tm)". Which is actually kind of a crappy facade in a way. Seducing =/= gaming the system unless ya are.
yes 100%. Society also tells men to do all the chasing. And that we need external things to be good enough. Thats why people chase money or exhausting careers. We literally contribute to woman's favor instead of being stoic and let them come to us. Which from experience works a lot better then the opposite.
@emf2482 you need some form of value for women to come to you though
Women don't care about a stoic man if he's still a bum
@@patrickmahon3476 To be fair this video teaches some things that we are doing wrong and should fix, that are not part of your character identity.
The world is nuanced.
But overall I think the whole premise of the video is wrong.
Thanks for telling us you didn't watch the video without telling us lol.
I wasn't sure if I'd like this based on the title, knowing it could go so many ways, but Robert Greene is great. I love hearing about the why. Very informative and clicks any missing pieces into place.
I am highly present with you in what you are saying. Totally into what you are saying, getting to know you deeply...
I am slightly dangerous, and very resourceful....
😋
This is not Tinder, buddy! Hehe@@godswittness69
Sure does!
Hahahah Same here.
Brittany, do you find Robert sexually attractive?
He’s spot on about using niceness strategically
There's also _How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen_ by David Brooks.
So happy you have him on today
None of this matters if the woman doesn't find you attractive,, women are allowed to care about looks now and that bothers some men
Bingo
Yea we've always wanted the pretty boys since our teens. Guys don't know the power of a handsome man to us. Gets the oxytocin going not the sexual stimulation men get by visual. The infatuation hormone is super strong. Look at how girls scream for BTS or boy bands that's oxytocin. Look how hypnotized men are at strip clubs, it's a diff hormone reaction.
Absolutely nailed it. FIRST establish that she's attracted to you, if not , it doesn't matter.
Attractive physically? Ive seen a lot of successful, confident men with game who arent the best looking get with woman who are better looking than them.
@@samnectarUh.. I'd take an ugly billionaire chick 7 days a week and twice on Sunday 😂
Thank you so much for this interview!
Thank you for sharing and time your renowned guest
Robert is an absolute gem of a human, can’t wait to listen 📈
This is what is called an incredible deep level conversation!
33:14 Spot on what Robert is saying here. That is what we will think in a situation like that because All women regardless of how confident some may be, we still have this insecurity and this fear of rejection. That is what I would feel immediately in that situation when a man says lets not go any further. I would actually cry thinking he saw my fat rolls and wants to go home. Haha.
😂😂. The fat rolls part. Too funny
Robert green is always the man for alot of topics for men❤
Thank you for this podcast. Everything he said was true!
Great interview!
That was a very insightful conversation. Specially I connected to the lines: fear of no loss, specially when you talking to your type of woman. Also the part you have to be present in the moment with your heart. Find myself often follow my script. Thanks for all the value both of you.
Not fearing loss means moving on when rejected. Not stalking, harassing, obsessing over her in any shape or form, contacting people asking about her or ruining her life, social life, career, decision to move, love life, etc. that’s not cool, calm and collected. It’s the opposite. It’s brash, psychotic, jealous, bitter and insecure. The longer you do it, the more bitter you are.
My goal in life is to become a Vampire Billionaire
"You need to know when to disappear for a week so they know they can't take you for granted". "Everyone secretly wants to be vulnerable." So... gain trust, then cynically manipulate. Great way to create lasting connection.
Boom.
Female language exactly.
@@PeteLG but in this case, a book of it written by a guy describing how to succeed in relationship. Bad approach no matter who is doing it imo.
@@KK-dv3whwomen like that though
thats why i quit dating women this days not worth it ...
This interview was profound and exactly what I needed. Thank you.
Follow this garbage at your own peril. He’s right about everything he’s right about mystery and seduction. His advice will definitely get you laid. And in the morning, when you are not able to be her fantasy into the next day, when you have to go back to work when you have to return to your real life, when the responsibilities rise with the sun to dissolve your fantasy island, she will destroy you.
Love it ! always love Robert Greene’ books and ideas 🙏🏻🌷✨🙏🏻
Glad you’ve enjoyed it, sweet sexy little honey 🍯 pot
Yes. Some hosts are smart enough to know we came on the hear their guests.
1:01:04 "meek"
It doesn't mean "weak"
it's more like "trained" or "disciplined"
similar to "cooperative/ controllable by its master"
To illustrate:
a MEEK horse is still strong to carry loads and people. But it is rideable and can be steered by a rider.
Same case with police dogs.
They are meeked but not weak.
#tamed
I always like what Mr. Greene says.
Omg they finally posted Timestamps 🙂😄😊👏👏👏 THANK YOU
thanks man for provide us this great interview with sir Robert Greene
That was hell of a podcast. This man is a gem to society.
That’s debatable.
If advocating extreme manipulativeness and psychopathy is being considered a gem today, then f society.
He wrote the famous book "The 48 Laws Of Power" , a favourite of the ultimate psychopath Tony Blair , says it all @@A_n_y_t_i_m_e
He has his own UA-cam channel: Just search for him 😊
@@masteryoda498 you’re negative and self defeating.
Robert Greene is a ninja of seduction and very knowledgeable and advanced. I love you!
He seduced you
Yes! Tom nailed it. Woman do want to feel they are the only one that their man wants, desires, and cant contain his strong desire for her, but only for her.
Robert is a blessing to us all
amazing episode please do more such episodes on seduction!
Ohhhhhh is that the Infamous Robert Greene😳 OG fa real. Thank you for this
Thank you for the insight
There’s still hope in this world. Thank you Tom and Robert Greene.
Your humility and confidence shine through every episode, Tom! 🌟🎥 #ConfidenceIsKey #StayHumble
If this guy were really a master of seduction, surely he wouldn't have picked those glasses.
One minute into it, it sounded like two teenage gamers trying to plan how to storyboard an animation.video of anime porn.
Or would he? The point is, if you've got skills/game, you can wear dorky glasses. Doesn't matter.
What is interesting about this conversation is that it's aaaaall about the woman and what THEY want.
No one is asking or is interested in what men want, who cares right? It's all about the women women women 24/7.
Men have fantasies too men have needs too men also have certain things they like that they want to see.
If my needs are not met and no one cares about what I want as man then why should I care about what the woman wants?
Well done.I appreciate your advice. The discussion about office dynamics is so true. All I can say is well said and all I advise is look at your own integrity and at the same time do not let yourselves people to get used ( look at this closely)
You probably/ likely be deeply hurt in so many ways however don't perpetuate that hurt.
What an interesting conversation this is.
Robert Green is my spiritual leader.
I really needed this video
Peace through strength. Forge your body and skills, but most importantly, your will to act when it is absolutely necessary, but the best fight or battle is the one that never took place. Using the brain is the most important tool and weapon...keep it all sharp!
Great video. I don’t enjoy when people who have never been to war speak on it. War is like football? I’ve done both and they couldn’t be more far apart. Stick to what you know brother. Both of you are smarter than I am by far. Neither of you are warriors.
I think perhaps you might havectaken that comparison too literally. My suggestion is that they were referring to strategy in that strategy is applicable to both scenarios.
Your taking that statement too literally. They are just making a rough comparison there because both things are physical in nature.
Football is a lot like war. Or rather, it's a proxy for it. It allows you to execute plans with teammates against another team of males. It requires strength, skill, and courage, and it's relentless in its rules. I've never been to war, and I can't speak on the terror, shock of reality opening up before you, the depth of being forced to make choices that shake your whole self, the darkness and inescapability. There's not much of that in football. But football allows you to determine who might be good in a war, and having a sorting hat for mate quality, without a bunch of your males dying. So goes the theory.
I didn't watch the video to be honest. I do think you have a point. The subject of women shouldn't be compared to war or football in anyway. Men are the reason both(football/war) happen. Men also are the only ones playing or fighting. These guys are trying to be part of the groups trying to create better men for women. Why? Women are suppose to support their men in general. Pretty simple concept. Men must respect the women WHILE women support and respect men. It's all changed now. Women are entitled and spoiled. How can you change that. If men are basically still the same.🤷♂️. In general of course.
Two guys who don't get beautiful women discuss seduction.
ha
"It's pretty clear if you pay attention, right?" Nice one, Robert. :)
I like how he referred to Machiavelli(knowing how to shift with the times), that took me straight to 48 Laws of power.
Be nice with boundaries
this conversation will go down the history books. I've learned so much from these two guys and I'm looking forward to reading the art of seduction❤.
30:35 immediately made me click the like button cuz bro...he started speaking some real truth...but so far this has been a great podcast...im watching it while i do my workout.
so imma get back to my workout and get back to listen to this.. much love to yall
about @23:00 "POWERLESSNESS CORRUPTS MORE THAN A POWER" -
Thank you for this.
Great conversation and awesome interview. Robert is one of my favorite authors and I see why he's comfortable with Tom. Great yield of info.
make yourself as good looking as possible, women choose men based on their looks.
Amen to that!
This guy (Robert) is real. Exactly the places where we deal with violence everyday.
Finally!!! Thanks!
Excellent interview!!!
Be Both I considerm MYself Sweet And sour ! People do not need to be abusive !
I pretended to be what a woman wanted but then realized I didn't want to continue pretending. So for "sincere" people this is very problematic, there being a world full of non-realistic women whereas most men are more realistic and sincere, less prone to fantasies and not wanting a life of pretense.
8 to 20 burpees without push-ups with or without jump or more.
10 to 20 goblet squats or more
10 to 20 romanian deadlifts or more
3x
10 to 20 180 degree jumps or more
10 to 20 push-ups or dumbell bench press or more
10 to 20 back rows
3x
30 to 60 jumping jacks or more
10 to 20 bicep curls or more
10 to 20 shoulder presses or more
3x
30 situps or more
3x
Run 1/4 mile or more
4x
Mix and match
Nice
🎯
GREAT. was even more interesting than I expected. Touched on some topics we dont hear every day
Robert Greene is a genius very great a session
I think of myself as a nice guy, and I know it came from my childhood because my mother showed love toward me if I was a nice boy. So now, as an adult, I'm always nice to others because I want them to like me, and most of the time, I get hurt and feel being used by others.
Don’t feel that way ,there are plenty of women who will embrace your kindness and will want you as a loving partner .❤
Tom needs to stop injecting what he thinks about the subject and instead draw out Greene. Tom made an interviewer's biggest mistake at the beginning of this interview but did get better as it continued.
Playing games will only get you into a divorce down the line.
Okay we human have duality,you have to strike a balance not too nice and not too harsh, to show that you are capable of both.
Over competition is actually weak but the internalised David Goggin’s approach is an option. Keep your pain to yourself and always remember the strong, intelligent, shape-shifter Tortoise is always accruing good energies in the Spiritual Universe.
Robert sounds like he's about to sneeze and looks like he's about to cry.
Let's see how you look after you suffer a stroke and lose control of 1/2 of your body.
Yep. There's this thing called allergies you see...
@@IIISWILIII Oh. That sounds awful. No one I've met have expressed allergies like that.
Tate be catching stray bullets everywhere he goes 😂
,,, As well he should.
That's one very insecure dude. That's why he got rekt by Greta Thunberg and pizza boxes lul
Tom is great here. Robert is also great. If you are a man that needs help with women ( like 99 percent) watch this because this information is the beginning of understanding how to be successful with women. Forget about the past.
Tom is hardly great. Talks too much. Tries to prove himself too much. He needs to shut up and let the guest talk. Tom is annoying.
“Be Yourself”… one if not the most misunderstood secrets to a fulfilled life
If “be yourself” worked everyone would already be successful at this
A woman's fantasy is a man who is authentic and confident enough to just live himself fully and be vulnerable.
4 women gave this a thumbs up. Your sentence literally means nothing
How can you bring Robert Greene and speak more than him!!
When a fighter invites a wizard to a philosophical discussion, both have distinctly different ways of understanding reality and/or and solving problems.
Generosity, a confidence from not being insecure, calm coolness, bring an aura that you respect their qualities, differences, and uniqueness...Plus, pay attention, know when humor, compliments, and empathy can be useful......Genuine gentleman get the key to the lock box... "I gotta write this shit down'......
At the risk of being offensive. I'd rather be lectured to in this subject by a woman, not a man. Just like I would switch off listening to a woman telling me how a man thinks.
That's very interesting. What makes you think that?
@@GermanwithGerrythats like asking a fish how to catch it.
If you want to know what women want, then watch how the men they bang act.
Its so simple
@@crushinnihilism that's pretty much exactly what I thought, so I was interested in why the original commenter had a different perspective ...
Anyway, thanks for answering! :)
@@GermanwithGerry its an answer I often hear from women and men who don't do well with women lol.
@@crushinnihilism which answer do you mean?
I love Robert Greene's interviews.
Wait , why are not the same videos being posted about men for women? I call bs
When you spoke of fear, my bet is fear of rejection, failure, creepiness, openness, etc. at the onset. Not the fear of the power someone has over you. Anecdotal because I've never felt that, although I do tend to slip on healthy distance after the act so perhaps a different manifestation of the same (that has ended a couple of good things over the years). Our society gives alternatives to the list I mentioned at the start and punishes them readily. I think younger generations have become so constricted by culture it has become a failure to act - just a guess.
I only got through tye first 9 minutes, but I sure wish you'd understand that women are listening too!
What are your thoughts on this?
As an editor of romance novels (and as a woman), I can tell you women want to be heard, seen, and prioritized. Women are attracted to men that display some “dangerous” qualities because it shows the ability to protect. The only problem women have with a nice guy is that he doesn’t show that he’s willing (and able)to step up for her should she ever need him to (not always in a physical fight, but say, if his mother is giving her a hard time, he’s willing to step in and say hey you can’t talk to my wife/girlfriend/whatever like that). The advice this guy gave about nice guys was BAD and will backfire. Going back and forth between nice and unavailable (“make her want it”) is going to confuse her about your interest and make her think you’re either using her or not really attracted to her. Women want to be chased. Especially by a man who isn’t shy about his interest; Don’t make her guess.
Want to know why women want to be with the bad boy instead of the good guy?
The good guy will sacrifice her to save the world. The bad guy will sacrifice the world to save her. Women want to be valued like that.
How do you balance this mindset you're describing with behaviors like simping and over investment being a turn off? A big problem with Nice Guys is that they'll value a woman for more than the world, they'll value her above themselves. They are pros at setting women on a pedestal while setting the bar for what they get back too low. What's healthy about that?
Also think your analogy is incomplete, the full thing looks more like: "A good guy may sacrifice her to save the world, but he will also sacrifice himself to save her. A bad guy may sacrifice the world to save her, but he will also sacrifice her to save himself."
@@TheNynax I like your analogy better lol. That’s probably about right in the real world. My original analogy is just a saying in the romance writing world to express that the hero deeply loves the heroine.
I think there’s a difference between being a nice guy and a clingy doormat stemming from insecurity with no boundary enforcement. And as someone who used to be exactly like that, that goes for women too. Healthy communication about what everyone wants and boundaries that are respected is key. People can be nice without encouraging others to take advantage of them (I did this for years and it was awful but he turned into my dream man when I started communicating my boundaries. Just my personal experience).
Oh, let nature do what- and how- it's ever done. . .you'll never get more than you can handle, what's the matter with you anyway??😁
"Women want to be chased" until you do it late at night on the streets.
You drank a lot of koolaid.
Men value love. Women love value.
There. You know everything.
People pleasing can be a sign of complex/childhood trauma as part of the fight-flight-freeze-fawn response. Fawning, being overly nice to protect one's self from a perceived threat, making sure you're 'being good' to avoid the pain of a parent who is likely highly critical/abusive. Anticipating their needs and fulfilling them to be safe. A deep seated pattern that once you understand its origins, you can begin to amend your behaviour to better or improved reactions to people around you.
I’m a woman and haven’t watched/listened to this (might just out of curiosity) and maybe I’m different from other women in this regard, but I think respectfulness is so underrated. Men might be surprised just how far being genuinely and consistently respectful of the women you’re pursuing, combined with being self-respecting, will get you. Though it won’t help if it’s empty behavior-mimicking you adopt temporarily in pursuit of a self-serving agenda.
Someone in the comments section mentioned that this video encourages males dominance. I’d say nix that and replace it with respectful confidence.
FWIW.
You are right in the context of a long term relationship, but in the video they are talking specifically at what actually causes attraction, and the study of sexual fantasies in a lot of data points.
@Axel Axe not sure why YT wouldn’t let me reply to you directly. But I actually meant that even more so in the context of a fling! A man who’s sweet, trustworthy, and respectful of me and my desires would be the one I’d most likely explore crazy and not-so-crazy physical things with, even if I wouldn’t romantically date him, and even if I wasn’t super attracted to him. But combine those characteristics with confidence, and there’s almost no way I wouldn’t be attracted to him. Whereas in a serious romantic partner I’d look for a lot more than that - chemistry, common interests and values and goals, etc. But again, that’s me. Generalizing about women is probably the biggest error. We’re all so different.
@@calexprenas it’s true that generalizing is not the best thing. The problem is that most women are different from you and that’s why it makes it difficult.
I believe we need to be who we are and act in accordance to our identity. If that is attractive or not to someone specifically I honestly don’t care. I rather be kind and sweet than be a “bad boy”
The teacher student thing would be a good ethical question regardless of it being done at an adult school.
Seduction that works on anyone: be as there for the person as much as their mother would be, or the ideal mother would be; be mysterious and give them the ability to slowly solve you, the mystery, on their own. Be highly, highly interested in this person. It works particularly well if your interest in them seems illogical to them. Don't get so carried away that you become an actual stalker, of course. It's like stalking comfortably and carefully. Be incredibly unselfish and let them come to you, especially if the person is male. Men need to be kept in the masculine role or the seduction won't work. It means wait for them to call you and respond every time just as his mother would. She's the woman you will always be competing with.
A good analogy but false
That's pretty much almost exactly how my last relationship failed.
this is facts it worked i pulled a 10/10 18 year old latina baddie
we stalk each other and fantasize but never really bring it up in our friendship because she knows i have ALOT of work to do but she sticking and believing in me 🎉
Two of my favorite thought leaders.. epic episode 🙏🏼
Been there.... It's an elusion,(not really the woman you want to invest in) basically to get caught up in attraction to what you think will fulfill your soul, you are risking losing your soul. Sex needs intamacy, so you need trust, vulnerability in order to connect at a non physical level.
Taking love advice from this guy sounds dangerous enough lol
How fucked up is it that you have to be mean to women or treat them poorly to get them to like you!
Your statement is one of the only statements in this chat room that makes sense. Everyone else are slaves to their female masters.
blame the fucking parents
It's easy once you stop overconflating the amount of respect they deserve.
Love the vulnerability from Tom in this video lol
good video