Hard Truths About Breakups

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  • Опубліковано 19 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 97

  • @XX-fl4zg
    @XX-fl4zg 2 роки тому +54

    Just always remember everyone. Whether male or female, your ex did not leave/ghost/cheat because of anything you did or did not do(99% of the time). They left because of who they are!

    • @neerajgupta7532
      @neerajgupta7532 2 роки тому

      what does this mean?

    • @jamesg1974a
      @jamesg1974a 2 роки тому +9

      Like an inability to deal with their trauma

    • @andrasziegenham6766
      @andrasziegenham6766 2 роки тому +4

      Meh, this is just shifting the blame. Both parties are at fault most of the time. That 99% is totally made up.

    • @litedawg
      @litedawg Рік тому

      Bullshit

  • @sincebeggining
    @sincebeggining 2 роки тому +54

    I think facebook, instagram and all other social shit kills relationaships...

    • @XX-fl4zg
      @XX-fl4zg 2 роки тому +9

      Shows them every option available

    • @tim46153
      @tim46153 2 роки тому +2

      If you go on that shite yep

    • @susananavarrete2801
      @susananavarrete2801 2 роки тому +4

      That’s why I don’t have any social media except this UA-cam account lol

    • @michael88keys66
      @michael88keys66 Рік тому

      100/
      Bring bak 1920s

  • @brandonrobertkersjes
    @brandonrobertkersjes Місяць тому +1

    I just feel like I’m nobody’s best option in this world. I don’t value what people my age value.

  • @teralecole316
    @teralecole316 Рік тому +9

    Literally the best video on UA-cam about breakups. Relationships are new to me and I don’t have much experience. I finally fell in love and he turned against me and ended it. I have nothing to compare it to, so navigating what post breakup looks like was/is difficult for me. My knowledge on what a healthy break up looks like is very limited. This video brought so much clarity to me.
    If someone wants out of your life… there’s nothing we can do but to give them that and move forward with our own lives. Being with someone who tells you that they love you with their soul, then suddenly watch them have hatred and disgust for you….. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. I can’t believe someone did that to me. I can’t believe he treated my love like a toilet. I was minding my business when he barreled into my life to attached himself to my life. I gave him permission. And now, he couldn’t leave fast enough 💨 It hurts like hell and makes you feel…. Crazy.

  • @Antwan_the_Creative_Booker
    @Antwan_the_Creative_Booker 2 роки тому +9

    This was really educational and a hard truth to swallow when you're single and hopeful that you'll be accepted and not rejected.

  • @brandonrobertkersjes
    @brandonrobertkersjes Місяць тому +1

    My entire reality has been destroyed…

  • @pattibowers2138
    @pattibowers2138 Рік тому +5

    Thank you for this great video. I love your forthrightness.
    You are both great!

  • @Spacito1235
    @Spacito1235 2 роки тому +12

    Awesome video coaches, so true. Empathetic and Honest. And without giving us false hopes. I agree 100% with this checklist. The more you reach out, the more they run. My bf just told me how relieved he feels after the breakup. That he loves to be on his own and feels happy. Ouch. It is so painful to hear just as u describe in the video! It’s been ten days and I tried to stay friends just some texting here and there but no, he’s so cold. It just doesn’t work. He doesn’t know how to act now around me and it feels awkward. He doesn’t like that I told him no more contact we cannot be friends. He says it’s immature of me. But I feel it’s the most healthy for my mental and emotional state of being. Thanks for always being my compass. Love you guys so much!

    • @andrasziegenham6766
      @andrasziegenham6766 2 роки тому +3

      I don't think people should tell their exes that they go into no contact. Just disappear. Maybe if the ex keeps reaching out (breadcrumbs) you can tell them you can't keep it up if they don't want anything meaningful. But otherwise? Yeah, it does sound immature to announce it to someone who already doesn't care about you.

    • @MarceloSilva-oq8mk
      @MarceloSilva-oq8mk Рік тому +1

      In my case i just asked her fot a distance for a time because i still had feelings for her and was really sad maintaining a false friendship. It is rude and immature to just disappear, i would feel worse if i did that because even in the breakup she was nice and considerate with my feelings.

  • @doubleboy2388
    @doubleboy2388 2 роки тому +6

    Learning to be confident in uncertain times

  • @ponokunishima1
    @ponokunishima1 2 роки тому +2

    Very sad to hear this, but it’s the truth, The Hard Truth and it has to be said!
    Your videos are very informative and enjoyable to watch and listen to. Your humor always brings a smile to ones face in these darkest times. The Force is truly with you! Margaret is like Yoda, your grand high master, you are like Luke and Victoria is like Rey, your apprentice.

  • @alannajm
    @alannajm 2 роки тому +8

    yeah i feel ok knowing i was extremely good to him and he admits he doesn’t think anyone would be better. i hope he regrets it

  • @misterhenchmen
    @misterhenchmen Рік тому +3

    would you consider doing a video on those emails/stories of ppl's exes coming back after they moved on and found a better relationship? that would be great to hear about! I am def thinking I can do better.. thanks you two!! :)

  • @Damian-rc8tw
    @Damian-rc8tw 2 роки тому +30

    My girlfriend broke up with me almost 4 weeks ago now and have been in NC for a little over 3 weeks ago. We we're dating a little over 5 months.I was guilty of smothering her. I realize I have some anxious tendencies and she has some avoidance but she also has anxiety. Part of it was she was in an abusive relationship for 6 years and she's had a lot of bad luck with other exes. I probably overcompensated as a result, which ended up smothering her more. Anyway I didn't beg or plead when she broke up with me. I told her I would always keep a special place in my heart for her. My last contact was 3 days later when I said I was sorry for smothering her and if she ever wanted to start over to let me know. This was before I heard of NC. But it's tough. I'm heartbroken. I see now the hints she was trying to give me that I totally missed at the time. Now I'm trying to get myself together. I'm seriously considering the Creative Healing course though it's expensive. I've been watching these videos along with the Love Chat and Coach Lee which all seem to give good info. My ex isn't perfect. I know that. But she made me want to be a better person. Thankfully she hasn't blocked me or unfriended me. And I haven't made any big mistakes. We didn't have big fights, we had a lot of fun together, her family and friends said they loved me. Her sister thought I might be the One. So no outside factor issues. I just hope to get my woman back. Ultimately I want her to be happy. I truly think we can be happy together if I deal with my issues. But at the end of the day if she's happy without me then I'll live with that, as tough as it is. Is the course worth the cost? I realize it has to be for me primarily, though I can't lie that getting back with my ex is my primary motivation right now.

    • @ewljr
      @ewljr 2 роки тому +2

      It is worth it

    • @OS253
      @OS253 Рік тому

      5 months is not a relationship. It's a hook-up.

    • @Damian-rc8tw
      @Damian-rc8tw Рік тому +1

      @@OS253 that's a long ass hook up 😆

  • @MigrationMadeEasy
    @MigrationMadeEasy 2 роки тому +18

    Congrats on the promotion Coach Victoria!👏🏽 and great job as always to the rest of the team.

  • @thejoneseys
    @thejoneseys 2 роки тому +8

    The new mic is so good I can hear your thoughts now 😁

  • @pecopecovski1667
    @pecopecovski1667 2 роки тому +5

    So i got back whit my ex after 6 months,by listening to this videos and trained my self to not need her.So when we starrted going out again i was so trained to put up walls when we got closer i started being a jerk and i pushed her away again..But this time i don't feel anything,and no emotion and i can see my side of it,i don't think she is a bad person but i have more control over my attachement emotions and i will try to be a more oncederate person in the next relationship i have.I was so for her when we were first togeather so when she dumped me i felt that i needed to be more for me,but there should be a balance,listen to this man and you will be better.I am a solid project by just listening to the videos.

    • @dylanranstrom8618
      @dylanranstrom8618 2 роки тому +2

      i’ve been waiting to get your email and tell you about my story long story short of course. anyway we were together for 2 1/2 years and she called it quits and wanted to break up with “any good we had left” we were living together and i moved my stuff out it’s been a month so far and i’ve been doing no contact and she has been reaching out to me i’ve been replying nicely and keeping it short. within a week of no contact and finding your videos she told me she misses me and i told her i missed her back and she hasn’t replied since..

    • @dylanranstrom8618
      @dylanranstrom8618 2 роки тому +2

      she bread crumbed me by telling me she missed me and didn’t reply back and leaving me very uncertain and i just want to reach out again. BUT i stoped myself from reaching out!!! because i didn’t want to ruin ig

  • @joanolisa1
    @joanolisa1 2 роки тому +11

    I fee used and like a total piece of shit. I was replaced in a heartbeat. I was so loving and caring to this person. The pain and resentment is awful.

    • @silverroku
      @silverroku 2 роки тому +3

      Hang in there, you are not worthless. Someone will be happy to have you!

    • @andrasziegenham6766
      @andrasziegenham6766 2 роки тому +1

      Nah, you probably weren't replaced in a heartbeat. They were most likely looking for a way out for a long time without letting you know. Just too scared to dump you and end up alone. First they had to find the next victim.

  • @Muscle_Chan
    @Muscle_Chan 2 роки тому +14

    Explain to me why love and relationships are even worth it if they can and probably will just leave you at any moment. And let's be realistic, they will almost always replace you with another person very quickly, as if you were an object.

    • @finchy77finch79
      @finchy77finch79 2 роки тому +3

      Idk tbh got broke up with a year ago she contacted me once in that time she’s with someone else now as cliche as it sounds focus on yourself and believe you are better if they do come back hear them out but don’t listen to any unfair bullshit part of me still wants her back but what she’s done since has really really hurt and still does

    • @andrasziegenham6766
      @andrasziegenham6766 2 роки тому +3

      Just because there's a chance, doesn't mean it will definitely happen. So you can choose to take your chances and be happy or not even take a chance and be miserable.

    • @henrique.campos
      @henrique.campos Рік тому +1

      Exactly because they can leave but they are choosing to stay. This means a lot.

  • @moneytime1556
    @moneytime1556 2 роки тому +2

    I made growth but I’m still doing work after a year to make sure it sticks not trying to go to my old ways.

  • @lorip4087
    @lorip4087 Рік тому +1

    I have never broken up with anyone. I have always been cheated on and kicked to the curb, often heartlessly. Close to giving up for good.

  • @garettwalters4882
    @garettwalters4882 2 роки тому +8

    It's really hard when you have kids with them.

    • @OS253
      @OS253 Рік тому

      You have kids with them? That's a mistake I don't want to make.

  • @NerizzaBernabe
    @NerizzaBernabe 2 роки тому +3

    This is the best video I’ve ever watched.

  • @kathyyoest4085
    @kathyyoest4085 2 роки тому +3

    Great video - I always learn something !

  • @ian3620
    @ian3620 2 роки тому +4

    Craig, your mic sounds great Vic, you are so beautiful 💗 and you both are such beautiful southern belles y'all! Xxxx
    Also, your content is so good. You're so helpful even in situations where logic and feelings have been shat on from a great height!
    Your hard truths and what you tell us are so important and so pertinent, everyone should hear this stuff. Such important info for all of us, regardless of situation 💗

  • @Nate_The_Great69
    @Nate_The_Great69 2 роки тому +5

    She decided she wanted to breakup but needed to be friends and work our way back and she needed to be single so I gave her space 6 weeks later I reached out yesterday and she was shocked and said didn’t seem like I even cared and she moved on and healed from the relationship. In the end 1.5years I wonder if she ever truly loved me and I feel like I already know the answer. Been the worst time of my life. I know the way is forward but man life sucks hardest thing I’ve ever had to deal with.

    • @jsts22
      @jsts22 2 роки тому +4

      She is manipulating you and trying to make you feel bad and blame you. She said she wanted to end things, you said you wanted to work things out. Then she says it seems like you didn't care?
      Be glad she's gone

    • @Nate_The_Great69
      @Nate_The_Great69 2 роки тому +1

      @@fj4731 Well Coach Craig always at the begging of his videos he says "every relationship is different and everybreakup is different." I think no contact backfired in my situation, and maybe there was a little miscommunication on how we were proceeding forward (possible reconciliation). That being said I think it gave her the space to realize we had different priorities and careers in life and how to go about them and that time gave her the perspective and time to make a decision. When she blamed me for not reaching out, at the end of the day she could have also she was the one that broke it off and wanted space so I think deep down she was over working it out when she said it was possible but it wasnt't concrete in her mind yet. Going to sound like a broken record, but at the end of the day no contact is a tool for you to move on and create some space in the relationship and it's your life and you have to live with the decisions that you make.
      I hope I'm never in this situation again, but If I was I would set clear rules of engagement before the official split.
      It does get better, the crying has mostly stopped but I have hard days and good days. But I think you have to do the work realize what went wrong and what you learned from it regardless if you get back together or not and only then you can move forward.

    • @Nate_The_Great69
      @Nate_The_Great69 2 роки тому

      @@fj4731 I think thats a decison you have to make I was in termoil for those 6 weeks in hopes we would get back together and it would all work out. That being said after those 6 weeks I needed closure. I cried almost every day. As much as I didn't like the outcome I get to have some normallity in my thoughts and I can move on now. Life is my oaster again! I have really big dreams and this is an opportunity to really go for them!

    • @melov2544
      @melov2544 2 роки тому

      How u doing ?

    • @Nate_The_Great69
      @Nate_The_Great69 2 роки тому

      @@melov2544 got a job working 100hr work weeks in the oil patch, it’s been an adjustment for sure. I’m a lot more emotionally stable. But I am getting better but some days are hard like yesterday, I go back to having hope that one day we’ll reconnect even if it doesn’t mean getting back together but that’s probably wishful thinking. I’m exploring who I am again, every day is a new day, new possibilities. I honestly feel that I did everything in my power (heart and soul) to make the relationship
      work and at the time and that gives me some peace. Side note been journaling everyday for 30 day streak and that really helps it logs the memories and not forget the memories but continue forward.

  • @expatsierra
    @expatsierra 2 роки тому +2

    Thumbs up on the new sound quality. 👍

  • @kursengamer4699
    @kursengamer4699 8 місяців тому +1

    It hurts so much 😭💔

  • @middleofnowhere6322
    @middleofnowhere6322 2 роки тому +1

    Great advice, thankyou!!

  • @starfox1264
    @starfox1264 2 роки тому +4

    My gf broke up w me around 2-3 months ago and we been dating for 2 1/2 years and she ended up dating another person a month and a half later ;(

    • @owenearly3392
      @owenearly3392 2 роки тому +1

      Literally my biggest fear

    • @lory4305
      @lory4305 2 роки тому

      Rebound

    • @ScrivRavebreak
      @ScrivRavebreak 2 роки тому +1

      Mine was within 2/3 weeks bro if that, so think yourself lucky!

  • @psalms1163
    @psalms1163 Рік тому

    Great video bro

  • @gideonjs5000
    @gideonjs5000 Рік тому

    Coach, my ex gf.. We still hangout. We still go to movies, go camping, play games and generally just hangout, talk, laugh we two months in the break up and last night she said she still loves me.. When we do hang out she hugs me often as well but she just wants to remain friends. But I have to let go and she cried because she doesn't want me to but she said she respects my decision although she broke up with me.

    • @thecurrentmoment
      @thecurrentmoment 10 місяців тому

      Sounds like she wants to have her cake and eat it too

  • @krysdavis3792
    @krysdavis3792 2 роки тому +2

    Where can I find these personal growth videos? I am trying to become the best version of myself because I want to stop this cycle of bad behavior patterns that lead to the end of my relationship

    • @CoachCraigKenneth
      @CoachCraigKenneth  2 роки тому

      Do The Knowledge Workbooks or Creative Healing Course! They will change your life!

    • @krysdavis3792
      @krysdavis3792 2 роки тому

      @@CoachCraigKenneth thank you for all you do I hope in the end this works out the way I want it to but even if it doesn’t I’ll be a better person from this lesson

  • @lecp3248
    @lecp3248 2 роки тому +1

    Hi I accepted to stay friends with my ex, and because of that I got invited by her to go see her where she is staying at for three days. she is renting an Airbnb because she is visiting my country. Also, she told she doesn't feel anything for me anymore and I confessed her i developed feelings for her. she wants me to go but she told me it all be like friend. I am confused. I don't what she really wants. Does she really want friendship?

    • @israelmendoza5262
      @israelmendoza5262 2 роки тому +1

      No to being friends with your ex when you still want to be romantically involved with them.

  • @31Abell
    @31Abell 2 роки тому +3

    Thanks for the new video! I was wondering how do you handle no contact when you and your ex go to the same school and apart of the same clubs. I don’t ever reach out to her and I’m just focusing on myself but we have a large group of mutual friends so we constantly find ourselves around eachother but she acts like I don’t exist. How should I handle this?

    • @israelmendoza5262
      @israelmendoza5262 2 роки тому +1

      @anthony bell Craig always say that no contact is about not reaching out. But it is advised that you do not ignore them when they do. The ex ignoring you is part of the break up. They wanna show you that the relationship is really over so dont take that as an offense against you. Im not sure if the coaches would say the same, but I've seen a vid where a dumpee often sees his ex on a tennis club i think. He just says hi to her whenever he sees her in his immediate vicinity. But he does not make an effort to come over to her just to say hi. I think thats the right move, it shows your confidence and mature.just politely smile, say hi and then move on and mind your own business.

    • @31Abell
      @31Abell 2 роки тому

      @@israelmendoza5262 thank you so much for your reply. I’ve been watching Craig’s videos religiously to learn both about myself and what I need to do to improve and also understand my exes side. I’ve been really good at not reaching out to her at all. When we eventually become in close contact (we both will be at our volleyball club) I’ll be sure to stay friendly but not look for any excuse to force a interaction unless initiated by her. Thanks for the info! :)

  • @carlfreiermuth5424
    @carlfreiermuth5424 2 роки тому +1

    Oh wow there's no feedback sound now 🙏 I thought it might have been a psychology trick to help impact our subconscious 😁🥳

  • @ChrisLT
    @ChrisLT 2 роки тому +2

    New mics, new degrees, new era!

  • @eleojay401
    @eleojay401 2 роки тому +1

    Hey!
    Can you talk about "monkey branching"?
    Thanks

  • @jamesg1974a
    @jamesg1974a 2 роки тому +1

    Nice to see Victoria back

    • @lucykendall8258
      @lucykendall8258 2 роки тому

      I'm so happy having my ex fiance back 🔙 after being separated for months. All thanks to Dr marvis whom helped me to get back my ex again. I will suggest you get help from him it really works

    • @lucykendall8258
      @lucykendall8258 2 роки тому

      Contact Dr marvis right... away Text him now through wha'tzapp

  • @dmitryisaev5955
    @dmitryisaev5955 19 днів тому

    Yes, but… when getting married both pronounce an oath, right?! So, it is not quite a free ride without rules and restrictions. It is an obligation too, don’t forget this.

  • @mariotibbrine1
    @mariotibbrine1 2 роки тому +3

    You also have the same rights if you're not happy just leave infact make an awsome exit you are the star of your own life it's your movie you come first and every one else is just a costar or a supporting role you are always number one embrace it you are awsome its ok to be cocky make your boundaries heard and your likes and dislikes you can't control others you only have control of yourself and your actions.

  • @freddieperez7531
    @freddieperez7531 2 роки тому +2

    Hate to be spamming the comments every video but would love a video about monkey branching and what to do to get an ex back from that kinda of scenario

    • @adamwood87
      @adamwood87 2 роки тому +4

      The Love Chat has some videos about that. Though, I think the advice was exactly the same as it is for all other scenarios: no contact.

    • @mistergoodcitizen9914
      @mistergoodcitizen9914 2 роки тому +3

      If she left you for someone else my question would be why would you even want them back? They thought the other person was better then you!

    • @CB_Toaster
      @CB_Toaster 2 роки тому +3

      do you really want someone back who is monkey branching?

    • @andrasziegenham6766
      @andrasziegenham6766 2 роки тому +1

      Don't do it bro. They're pathetic. The only reason they monkeybranch is because they know they're worthless enough to risk ending up alone if they break up before lining someone else up first. Do you really want to end up with such a person?

  • @psalms1163
    @psalms1163 Рік тому

    Dynamic duo

  • @Kimery-kg6bc
    @Kimery-kg6bc Місяць тому

    Lol. I love the broadcast and recognize the work… just a bit poor ☮️

  • @joanev
    @joanev 2 роки тому +1

  • @chriswalls5831
    @chriswalls5831 2 роки тому +5

    Break up more chicks out there