Sister Wives #1 - (Beginnings) - Therapist Reacts
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- Опубліковано 27 тра 2024
- Dr. Kirk Honda reacts to Sister Wives. Includes clips from Sister Wives.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.
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Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being.
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REMINDER: please don't spoil anything for Dr Kirk. Otherwise, this reaction series will be ruined for him. Or he will have to avoid reading the comments.
Strongly agree! ❤
You're in for a ride Dr kh. Glad you started this.
I am so excited for your journey. For me it is a repeating trip, but I love the company this time around! I have followed since the beginning and still follow some of the wife's and grown children on Instagram. And I absolutely think you will add some perspective because of the time since they started the show and all the knowledge you bring to the table.
omg, I’m so excited
I have been waiting for this
,s
I grew up Mormon. My mom used to say all the time she wished she had another wife because my father didn’t help with raising us and expected my mom to have sex with him whenever he wanted, even if it was 2am and she was sleeping. Now as an adult I realize she didn’t want another wife, she needed a different husband.
Exactly, she didn’t want an other wife, she just wanted help.
I was raised mormon and my best friends dad cheated on her mom with her mom's best friend. He later tried to repair his marriage by going to his ex wife with the proposal of plural marriage "like the old mormons" she moved across country to get away from that creep thankfully
One of the reasons many women practice polygamy
How did you find out that he expected her to be available for sex at any time?
@@helena5442 My mother told me when I was in my mid 20s. I was with a partner at the time who was sexually coercive and thought no meant convince me. So she shared her experience with me I think to support me in saying no since she regrets, as she put it, “giving in just to get it over with.” My dad also alluded to it while I was growing up - the idea that it is a wife’s responsibility to be sexually available to her husband at any time and if she doesn’t like it that’s totally normal because women just don’t like sex the way men do… blah blah sexist cultural narratives blah. As I’m sure lots of folks can imagine, it’s not a great feeling knowing your own father is a perpetrator of marital rape, especially as a survivor of sexual violence myself.
OMG!!!!!! I have been waiting YEARS!!!! I even messaged Dr. Honda 3 years ago asking if he could review this show and HE HAS ANSWERED MY PRAYERS!!!! I watched this show growing up when it first aired, and thought Kody was an amazing husband and father. Fast forward to a few years ago, after earning my psychology degree, I thought I would rewatch the series as I fell off watching it. AND WOW. Such a change in perspective. EVERYTHING is different. THANK YOU, Dr. Honda, I can't express how excited I am for this series. Thank you for not putting it behind a paywall as I entered my post-graduate degree program and am still living that broke student life lol.
I’m SOOOO excited !!!
I emailed as well years back! So much psych stuff especially last 3 seasons! Sooo excited hope he does the latter seasons too ❤
ive been asking too!
Me too!! I'm so excited!!!!
Unsurprised but still impressed by Dr Hondas ability to pick up on soo many things right off the bat that we don’t end up seeing for a long time.
Right??
Less than five minutes in and he’s clocking the potential for misogyny and disempowerment of women LOL. Dr. Honda is so perceptive!!!!
Remember when the show first premiered and we were bright-eyed and bushy-tailed over this show. It was such a new concept that we threw caution to the wind, and now over a decade later, we're traumatized.
Agreed! He had this all dialed in immediately- WILD
Y’all this is my Super Bowl!!!!!
haha same for me
Lol just made the same comment
Sameeeeeeeeeee🎉🎉🎉🎉
I knew Kody was self centered when I saw the preview for the first episode that showed his small expensive sports car that only fit two people. He had three wives, twelve children (with one on the way), and was dating the fourth wife at the same time who also had children. 🤷♀
Kody needed the two seater convertible to show off his blonde hair that he would fling around in an effort to look like a stud. Not very dad like behavior.
Right? But I just ignored that because everybody seemed so happy. I was so young when I first started watching
Yes. At Girl’s Camp that year he taught one of the classes and showed off his car by using it as a white board with a dry erase marker. I was one of the girls in the class.
@@christinepirir6759 Wow really? What's he like in real life?
@@sarahsmith3682 Funny. Loves the spot light. But also kind of like he thought he was better than you. Their family was always helpful and kind of a pillar of the community-especially Christine she was so funny. She taught us the girls camp songs and was very warm and fuzzy and outgoing. He seemed a lot nicer and happier back then. I haven’t seen them since they moved to Vegas though it’s been forever. Their family was excommunicated shortly after the show aired because the church leaders didn’t want them to do a “documentary”. Also the Brown family worked hard to attempt to legalize polygamy in Utah and they argued that it’s an alternative lifestyle similar to gay marriage. That was highly offensive to the church leaders to legalize polygamy “on the coat tails of gay marriage” is what they said. So they kicked Kody and his wives out. The prophet warned Kody that he would lose his family if he continued with the documentary against the will of the council. It is considered a fulfilled prophecy now.
I think this is going to be your biggest google doc yet Dr. Honda!! I'm so happy you're delving into this one, thank you!!
Yes! It will be interesting watching it back knowing what we know now
@@thalaline yeeeees!! And esp with everything that's happened the last 4 years. Can't heckin wait
I love the google doc ready like it's in a holster. 😂
Omg it’s happening
This is not a drill
"Love should be multiplied, not divided" Funny how polygamists never think everyone should have multiple spouses, only men, and sometimes not even all men.
I always found this phrase kind of funny, because marrying one person and having children with only one person isn’t “dividing” anyone’s love, lol.
@@Schu0086 I agree. And you could also say of your one spouse that your love for them grows with time together.
Love was multiplied for Kody but the women’s was divided. Each wife only got a fraction of a husband.
Right they are actually making the love less since some men won't have women to marry.
@@betsymcmillan3260 also each child, because you cannot tell me he was able to be a present father to that many children. He literally went on to divide his one big house into multiple households and spent a disproportionate amount of time in one… 🙃
I think one of the main things that indicates to me that this version of polygamy is misogynistic is that only men are allowed to have multiple wives. They don't allow women to have multiple husbands and the wives are not allowed to have intimate relationships with each other. Not that they have to do those things, but it equal polyamory those are options that are available.
I'm really excited to see your reaction to this show. As always, I love your videos!
I have been waiting years for this! I can't wait to hear your thoughts from the beginning even with knowing how it's turned out so far!
I am actually really stoked to rewatch the beginnings, I remember I thought they looked like a nice family, wonder how I will view it now , kn9wing what we know now.
Me too! Every message i send is about this.. all of 3 ive sent 😂
Ooooooooh boy you are about to embark upon a journey Dr Honda! I can’t wait to hear your thoughts on the later seasons especially!
Oh boy...here we go! 🫣🤭
Oh man, at some point watching Cody in particular is like a knife to the kidneys.
🤣🤣🤣
Does anyone else just watch these to relax? Drs voice is so soothing.
The only thing that helps my anxiety ... Weird I know .
The only thing that helps my anxiety
Hello sir, hope all is well. You were my counselor years ago, glad to see you on this platform. I would love to see you review Gerrick Merrifield and his family on seeking sister wives, something is going on that I think is deeper than what appears his wife looks like she is in pain but hides her true feelings, IDK, I'm not a psychologist.
Your knowledge of people's characters and their relationship dynamics are close to being a superpower, I'm baffled every time you start a series I've watched for years and totally hit the nail on the head
Kinda goes to show that we humans aren’t as unique and special and complex as we often like to think… but instead we are all pretty predictable and follow certain behavioral and cognitive patterns that psychologists can easily pick up on right off the bat 😬😅
Christmas came early this year! This is the content that I need! Thank you for covering this fascinating dynamic.
Yeees!
Starting from the beginning! Go dr Honda!
Remember to take note of what Kody says about the 3 first wives, good and bad. It's important for later seasons.
While I personally would never ever want a polygamous lifestyle, I do have to give credit that the Brown's polygamous family is not at all like most FLDS groups we think of, like The Kingston Order. The Brown's did give their children complete choice of their lives and religion choices, not trying to marry them off young or pull polygamy at all. Both boys and girls were encouraged to attend college, preferably prior to marriage, then when they did marry, all choosing monogamous relationships, including two LGBT+ marriages, they were fully supported. No one had to "escape" or be excommunicated for wanting a completely different lifestyle, like what is seen in Warren Jeff's FLDS or The Kingston Order.
That's only because Kody later on did not belong to any church and made himself the rule maker in his family. They stopped going to church service and only would do service at home. Once his relationships started deteriorating, his wives only focused on what was best for their kids and not Kodys's opinion.
Cause they left the area and the group threw them out. The only thing good about the show is the kids lives turned out different.
I do wonder how much of what you just stated would have been different had they not been on a successful TV show that they did not want cancelled. Would Leon even still be a part of the family ? Would the children have had less autonomy in general . We already know that it is/ was much worse behind close doors than what was showed on camera. It just makes me wonder a little bit.
@@BekaB85 in 2015 Mariah was in college and wanted to be a sister wife. In 2017 Mariah announced she was attracted to women and soon after introduced the family and viewers to Audrey. 2019 got engaged. In 2021 Audrey said I am male. In 2022 Leon said I am male. 7 years to go from wanting to be a sister wife, to being a lesbian, to being with a partner transitioning to male and staying even though attracted to women, to being male attracted to men and changing name to Leon is more than I can wrap my head around. Did college not cover T just LG that first few years of college? What are the odds of both partners doing that? Two in the family not raised in polygamy. They basically chose a different lifestyle. So they always approached as the kids can do the same. Choose a different lifestyle. How can they expect people to accept their alternative lifestyle if they don’t do the same. Leon would have been a sister wife. As would Gwen. Most the boys however would not be practicing cause the math does not add up. In this religion 2/3 of boys do not have a spouse.
@@kristinesharp6286I'm pretty sure Leon would identify as pan sexual. I am a straight woman and have been married for 15 years. If my husband decided to transition I'd love them the same. I love him as the person at this point fat beyond his gender. Vice versa. I'd be shocked if he decided with transitioning that he wanted to end our relationship. I don't see that happening and id assume it's the same for Leon. Loving Audrey is about Audrey the gender isn't relevant.
Oh! This is gonna be a juicy one! Especially as you go into the later seasons!❤
It's silly how excited I am for Dr. Honda to go through this series. Especially the newer seasons.
Kirk nails the entire series at 16:20 🤣🤣🤣
😂 so true
Noticed that too 😮. Completely in awe.
no way I am so glad you're doing sister wives!!! One of my all time fav shows I have so many questions on my mind, the relationships are so interesting I can't wait to hear your professional thoughts on this!
FYI, the Mormon Church outlawed polygamy in 1890. This led to a lot of break off groups, some of which separate themselves from general society (FLDS) and some that live in regular neighborhoods (United Brethren). As someone who lives in Utah, the way that you can tell a polygamist family is that the moms and kids are always very poor with little/no education (in a state with very high levels of college educated women), few friends, and live near the point of the mountain (the weirdest, redest part of the Provo/Salt Lake area).
As a Utahan, thank you for saying that this state is beautiful. It truly is. I'm proud of this beautiful landscape. I'm not proud of the fringe outskirts groups that make our state a big stereotype. I hope we can do better by our indigenous people and history as well.
YESSSSSSSSS SISTER WIVES FINALLY!!!
Dr. Honda, I know you did a video about Better Help a while ago, but I believe it’s time to do more research. It breaks my heart to see a therapist I trust sponsoring them.
You addressed the claims about having unlicensed therapists being allowed to practice in their TOS but there is so much more. There are tons of videos here on UA-cam that go into the specifics, as well as anecdotal stories by other therapists, and clients. Things such as therapists being told their name is listed on BH’s website as a doctor they can book, and then when someone tries it says “they’re not accepting new patients, here are other doctors” as a way to use legitimate, licensed clinicians to lure in clients and hitting them with a bait and switch. The doctors were never approached nor did they agree to be listed on their site.
Please, just do more due diligence. You know your audience is vulnerable and I know you’d feel terrible if you referred them to a service that ended up taking advantage of their struggling.
Bad thing about starting now late is they have heavily edited out any parts that make Robyn look bad. The original airing showed lots more. Example : Robyn kicked family senior labrador and it was sad.
OH MY GOD 100% no one picks up on this reason for watching the show-I love my dad to death AND I grew up in a family really messed up by patriarchy and toxic masculinity. It’s not the only reason, but one of the top reasons I watch the show is because it helps me process my own childhood. I wish more people would pick up on this. Thank you!❤
I'm new to this show but I get the feeling this is going to be a wild ride 😄
SHUT UP!!! I was literally on a binge of Sister Wives videos and was wishing you would review it! So excited!!!
I am so intrigued to hear your upcoming reactions to this series. I really can't wait!
Hearing the intro, " Love should be multiplied, not divided," always drives me completely insane. Dividing love is exactly what they are doing for everyone involved except Kody. But, hey, it is Kody's world, so that really is all that matters, right? Sickening, completely sickening!
This is my favorite reality tv show. I will watch every episode of you reacting on them
I can't express just how happy I am that you're addressing Sister Wives, Dr. Honda! There is so much to go through, so many layers. ❤
So happy you’re covering this family
Robyn, the 4th is a woman he had an affair with and they manipulated Meri into thinking Robyn would be friends with Meri
So excited for this, Dr. Kirk! 😊 Thank you!
Near me is a town called Stickney, but everyone calls it STINK-ney. There is a massive plant there where they treat sewage water and you can ALWAYS smell the rotten egg smell of the hydrogen sulfide that gets released from the treatment. It just sits like a big blanket over the whole town.
Please explain the relevance of this comment
@@user-gu7kk5zk2b 25:34 when he starts talking about stink town and Tacoma aroma 😂
Dreams do come true! I’m sooo excited for this.
Not Dr. Honda calling out the Tacoma Aroma 😭😭😭😭
Oof. This is going to be a bumpy ride.
5:14 Production glases over the core beliefs or certain things that the family does. Example if I remember correctly, doom prepping, welfare fraud, and bigotry.
8:15 Also before the show the family was living in poverty.
20:21 Polyamory definitely has the capability to be a beautiful extended relationship. I just don't see it being the same experience when rooted in fundamentalism, but that is just an opinion.
24:38 He was/is a firearms salesman (less so in recent years)
The family looks so happy in the beginning
FINALLY!!! I've been curious to hear you analyze this family for ages. Thank you.
Please check out Mormon Stories Podcast given how much Mormon content you're consuming. They have SO much good info on Sister Wives/Vallow-Daybell/Franke/Mormon history/Mormon crime.
Yasssss!!! I’m thrilled! Thanks Dr. Kirk for fulfilling my dream of your commentary on all things Sister Wives!
I love how fast your brain works !!! I cant wait for all these episodes to come ❤
Would love if Honda could review the Ashley Madison documentary! Some hard hitting stuff there I think.
Yesss I’ve been waiting for this!!
Yay! Excited to watch this with you Dr Kirk! I've seen it pop up during votes on the polls a few times but I've never seen Sister Wives before, so it's gonna be very interesting!
I love that you're delving into analyzing this family, Dr. Honda!
It's interesting to go back to season 1 and hear how they are telling the story of their family versus what we know now many years later.
IM SO GLAD YOURE FINALLY DOING THIS!!!!! Many of the episodes are flashbacks and replays so you definitely can skip a lot but there are key moments and episodes *spoiler* (Christine’s birth with Truly, Meris catfishing and divorce, and the final Covid episodes.. etc) I can’t wait to see you cover this!
No you need to go thru all 18 seasons or you will not get the full scope of what monsters Kody &
Robyn are. They are grifters, conman, theives, kody abandoned 13 kids. Left polygamy but continued to take paychecks from 3 wives who he admitted he NEVER loved. He is a disgrace. He had 13 kids while pretending to love their mothers! The emotional psychological trauma he threw at 16 human beings he once said were family is appalling & degrading.
YES!!!!! Cannot wait to watch your analysis of this series!!!
I have never clicked on a video faster since being a huge fan of Dr. Honda for years now. This is a long journey and I can't wait for more.
I am so happy with this series! I've finally found the time to watch it, and now I can binge it!
One thing that is often ignored with these types of couples or people with excessive amount of kids Elon musk Nick Cannon for an example is possible breeding fetishes.
So glad you’re digging into SW! You should reach out to Gwen when you’re done and ask her for an interview.
Well... I wish I'd been as smart as you when I watched this for the first time however many years ago... Definitely leaving out things, definitely darker and more damaging than any of us could have dreamed. You'll have to come back and rewatch your reactions and comments when you hit the end of this marathon. I love how you watch "reality" TV, and have learned so much about keeping my brain turned on and questioning the narrative instead of just accepting everything presented to me as Truth.
OMG I AM SO EXCITED THAT YOURE WATCHING SISTER WIVES!!!! I cannot wait to hear your take on all the twists and turns and ultimately the very very sad recent stuff.
Meri wanted to control something in her life and whom lived in the home was one thing she could do.
So excited for this new series of Dr. Honda videos.
YAY! I wanted to start this show but its so long and older so i dont love that but im so excited ur recapping and talking about it!! here to watch it all :D
I've been hoping you'd do this series. I've watched it all and find it genuinely interesting. I think we can learn a lot from it.
Yeeess!!! I’m so happy you’re covering this! I’m such a sister wives nerd!! I’m so excited 🤓
i don’t see it commented anywhere. But just an FYI, Meri’s child is trans, and now goes by Leon. Leon uses they/them pronouns
I just think that topic hasn't come up yet but he will get there.
Came to say this ❤
First time commenting... I found your channel through your videos on the Duggars last year and as a psych nerd have have been making my way through your content ever since. You have such insightful material and I can’t say enough good things about it. I watched your Natalia Grace videos as a companion to the series and it really helped me process the difficult things I was watching. I’ve been listening to your podcasts at work and they are so validating for things I’ve been through and educational for things I haven’t.
Anyway, I’ve been watching Sister Wives since Day 1 and have hoped you would cover them one day, but knew it would be a huge undertaking. I’m so excited! And since you’re taking this plunge, maybe I’ll have to respond in kind and watch Love Is Blind. Sorry for the long comment; what can I say, I’m a fellow yammerer!
I'm SO excited about this!!! Especially the last season
Yesss finally!! Thank you Dr. Honda! I will forever be thankful to you for watching this! 🩵
Y E S! I have been wanting to see you react to this but figured it would never happen just because there are so many seasons. Glad to see you going for it, and I will watch every single video.
YEEESSSSS I was actually thinking how cool it would be if you watched sister wives earlier this week how bizarre!! I didn't think you would because there's so much content. I'm so excited :')
Yessssss I love this!!!! I’ve been waiting for this for awhile lol
You’re gonna love this! I’m so excited!! 🎉
Thank you for doing this series! I know you have a lot on your plate, but I am looking forward to your reaction to this family as they progress in seasons 💖
15:16 LOL I was just listening to this while getting ready, and then I looked down at my phone screen, and briefly thought you were sitting next to one of the wives who was listening intently while you were sharing your thoughts 😂
Omg yes! I've been wanting this forever!
I've been watching Sister Wives from the beginning, and I'm so excited to hear your take on these family dynamics! I've watched the show for a variety of reasons. I have a complicated family dynamic and it does heal in a way to watch a more complicated family and let out some of those feelings. I also have a desire to understand my family better and so I observe other families, almost like an informal anthropological or sociological study. And there's also an element of morbid fascination.
im so excited for this!
So excited!!!
If you are interested, many ex Fundamentalist and Main Stream Mormons alike have given eye opening commentary on the show and what things usually translate to behind the scenes. The Brown family parents also wrote a book with some revealing, at times disturbing coming information that might be worth checking out for extra contacts. Best of luck as you embark on this new journey!
As a poly person myself, I remember being so desperate for any poly representation that I consumed some of the 'sister wives' content. Ultimately, the sexism turned me away from being able to enjoy it, but there was SOME good poly concepts in here, like “compersion”, which is a form of joy in the joy of others. In the world of consensually nonmonogamous relationships, it more specifically relates to the happiness someone finds in their partner seeking out and enjoying romantic intimacy with other people. It was touched on in this episode a bit.
LOL O-EM-GEE this is going to be a wild ride. I remember watching this for the first couple seasons. I have a Great Uncle who has 3 wives. Except he is Muslim and from Central Asia. And they have totally different customs and traditions about polygamy than Mormons do. I remember being intrigued and appalled by Cody at the same time. Also my Great Uncle's wives are actually really close and like best friends. I have never seen them angry, or jealous, or saw my Uncle mistreat his wives in any way. Of course I asked my aunts though if they ever did get jealous and they all told me not jealous over my uncle lmao. They said they would sometimes get jealous over resources- so I thought that was interesting. They did not use those words exactly, but those were the examples they gave. Like if they felt one wife was getting more 'good', which was unfair, it would hurt their feelings. But they always were open about it and my uncle would promptly correct the situation. Also, my uncle and aunts are pretty old now. My Great Uncle is in his 90s lol. His youngest wife is almost 70 years old. They have been together for many decades it seems.
ALSO 18 SEASONS?!!! Seriously?! lol Also, I am concerned... If you only do 30 minute reactions once a week, you will never finish this. 😂
I am looking forward to your view on this soo much. Thank you Dr. Kirk!!
you may end up skipping entire episodes with no comment, but still worth getting to the end. i must admit i skipped many boring episdoes but its a ride
Here we go! Buckle up, Dr. Honda.
Please react to Dance Moms, the kids are all adults now. You can watch the most recent season where they reflect back as adults.
Wow!! Sister Wives is fascinating to me. I'm so excited you're covering this.
omg I went on a Sister Wives deep dive last summer, watched all 18 seasons in like 2 months, it was a crazy time. I love that you're covering this. There is so much to break down with this series. Mostly all the unspoken religious dogma that informs their lifestyle and choices...and also (imo) contributes to the breakdown of their marriages.
OMG im so happy we finally get your take on sisterwives 😭
So happy you are doing this show!
Excited you are now doing this show!
Kicking my feet! So excited 😊
I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS! I emailed you to request this and it’s finally here!!!!!
I so excited for you to review this one
Omg!! I've been hoping for sister wives reaction for so long
Oh I’m beyond excited for this
Omgggggggg im so here for this
Omg I’m so excited!
Omg im excited for this series 👏👏👏