As a child I realized my dad had a lot of anger. He was not home a lot as he was a sailor and gone for over a year at a time which is a long time when you are little. I realized he whipped us with a belt becasue he that is how he dissipated his anger. As a teenager if you did not agree with him voice a differing opinion he got angry and kicked with his boots on on your hips or behind he would slap. As a 90 year old man he took his cane and raised it to hit me. Even though I took him places, ran his errands and tried to help him even though he was not dealing with aging physical changes. He always need to control members of his family and I could see this as a teen. I tried to set boundaries but he never accepted my boundaries as his desires were what was important. The day he raised his cane up over his head to threaten and to hit me. I took the cane from him and told him it was not acceptable to use his cane to hit or threaten another person. That I never wanted to see this again. Then i preceded to help him. His face so filled with anger. I asked a Christian counselor why people would not give their anger to Jesus , why anger and belts that were used until they were tired were used on children who were actually good children just being children. He told me pride. I believe in discipline of children but not using discipline to a leave the adults feeling of anger or helplessness.
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." Your talk on anger, it's how's and why's was exactly what I needed at this moment. Thank you for sharing and doing your show. I appreciate you and believe you you provide wisdom, guidance and hope for all of us.
I like how John said he has to care enough about himself to want to change. I had to say this to myself over and over again to get past my eating disorder. For years I would say I wanted to change but clearly deep down there was something I was clinging to with the ED. Once I truly cared enough to just stop I ended the cycle of my eating issues. It’s obviously not always so simple but I think a lot of problems just boil down to a personal choice to change.
Thank you so much for this episode. I homeschool my two daughters and am a single mom and work from home, and I deal with extreme anger problems sometimes. I try my best to be calm, but its so hard when I am in the moment. This episode has really helped me. Thank you.
"The Power of Calm" by Nicholeen Peck from Teaching Self Government is an excellent resource on learning how to communicate assertively without being passive or aggressive. Highly recommend the four basic skills she teaches in her calm parenting tool kit. Not using a power struggle to communicate is much easier when you have a plan you have practiced for how to deal with each scenerio. She developed this working with foster children and it was so successful that she has been sought out internationally to teach these skills.
Guys are taught by society anger is one of the only appropriate ways we are allowed to express feelings. It is time to teach our young ones how to express all their feelings responsibly. Vulnerability paired with resiliency is strength.
It kind of sounds like the church people are just making him feel bad and shameful about feeling anger, not giving him concrete steps for how he can change his behavior.
Maybe, just maybe, he is also ashamed of them. If he has money, he might be conected with people who have money also. He wanted to have friends at the same level.
DID YOU WORK WITH COACH GIBSON!!! I'M ONE OF HIS STUDENTS (PARRAS DUMLAO) AND HE WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU WERE A GREAT AND AMAZING GUY!!! CONGRATS ON YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS SIR!!! HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!
I don’t think Nicholas is helping his friends by moving into one of his homes. If they get things handed to them, they are less likely to work for it themselves.
There’s a fine line between helping and enabling .
As a child I realized my dad had a lot of anger. He was not home a lot as he was a sailor and gone for over a year at a time which is a long time when you are little. I realized he whipped us with a belt becasue he that is how he dissipated his anger. As a teenager if you did not agree with him voice a differing opinion he got angry and kicked with his boots on on your hips or behind he would slap. As a 90 year old man he took his cane and raised it to hit me. Even though I took him places, ran his errands and tried to help him even though he was not dealing with aging physical changes. He always need to control members of his family and I could see this as a teen. I tried to set boundaries but he never accepted my boundaries as his desires were what was important. The day he raised his cane up over his head to threaten and to hit me. I took the cane from him and told him it was not acceptable to use his cane to hit or threaten another person. That I never wanted to see this again. Then i preceded to help him. His face so filled with anger. I asked a Christian counselor why people would not give their anger to Jesus , why anger and belts that were used until they were tired were used on children who were actually good children just being children. He told me pride. I believe in discipline of children but not using discipline to a leave the adults feeling of anger or helplessness.
"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." Your talk on anger, it's how's and why's was exactly what I needed at this moment.
Thank you for sharing and doing your show. I appreciate you and believe you you provide wisdom, guidance and hope for all of us.
I like how John said he has to care enough about himself to want to change. I had to say this to myself over and over again to get past my eating disorder. For years I would say I wanted to change but clearly deep down there was something I was clinging to with the ED. Once I truly cared enough to just stop I ended the cycle of my eating issues. It’s obviously not always so simple but I think a lot of problems just boil down to a personal choice to change.
100 percent of (personal) problems boil down to choice
Thank you so much for this episode. I homeschool my two daughters and am a single mom and work from home, and I deal with extreme anger problems sometimes. I try my best to be calm, but its so hard when I am in the moment. This episode has really helped me. Thank you.
Dr. Delony words are right on point. He is very smart.
"The Power of Calm" by Nicholeen Peck from Teaching Self Government is an excellent resource on learning how to communicate assertively without being passive or aggressive. Highly recommend the four basic skills she teaches in her calm parenting tool kit. Not using a power struggle to communicate is much easier when you have a plan you have practiced for how to deal with each scenerio. She developed this working with foster children and it was so successful that she has been sought out internationally to teach these skills.
Dude you're such a good psychologist!
Guys are taught by society anger is one of the only appropriate ways we are allowed to express feelings. It is time to teach our young ones how to express all their feelings responsibly. Vulnerability paired with resiliency is strength.
It kind of sounds like the church people are just making him feel bad and shameful about feeling anger, not giving him concrete steps for how he can change his behavior.
I still live my life trying not to make dad angry. My dad didn't even go to our wedding.
Why in the world does that man think his friends are his responsibility....people are gonna do what they want....
Maybe, just maybe, he is also ashamed of them. If he has money, he might be conected with people who have money also. He wanted to have friends at the same level.
He thinks it is control, but it is really pushing his children away and it could be forever. So it is really the opposite of what he thinks it is.
DID YOU WORK WITH COACH GIBSON!!! I'M ONE OF HIS STUDENTS (PARRAS DUMLAO) AND HE WAS TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU WERE A GREAT AND AMAZING GUY!!! CONGRATS ON YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS SIR!!! HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!
🤣 kick you in the face valuble defense move.
Tem uma versão dessa música que também sou apaixonada, do Nicola Cavalaro, vale a pena conhecer.
I don’t think Nicholas is helping his friends by moving into one of his homes. If they get things handed to them, they are less likely to work for it themselves.
Is this an old episode?
Regarding the fist caller there is nothing wrong with coping skills or pills, both are way better than potentially hurting your child.