How to Leave and Cleave: What is Enmeshment?
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- Опубліковано 25 лис 2024
- How to Leave and Cleave: What is Enmeshment?
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“Some families only know how to be close when theres a crisis, so they keep creating crisis” , someone make a reel of this line!
I wish I could get my Italian mother in law to watch this … 🤦♀️ he hit the nail on the head perfectly. Total enmeshment. No leaving and cleaving. I had to make an announcement on Thanksgiving that we weren’t spending our Christmas with his mother’s sisters family. They r all crazy just like he said. Can’t stand any of them. I’m at the cutoff point. Could care less. Only go and speak to these people when forced to. His mother is narcissistic won’t let go and 2 men living with their Italian mom into their 40’s doesn’t surprise me in the least
I’ve been watching pastor Mark non stop! Especially with these sermons about family issues and how to navigate them biblically. Not many pastors cover these situations.
I really love your sermons. I love how you are teaching from the bible. I do see that you are really focused on marriage and children. But I hope to see sermons about how God also calls woman and man not to have children. And they are not lacking anything. Not all people are called to have children. Not having children enables people to serve churches and communities in a non distracted way. For example being a supportive uncle or aunt. Or relieving parents by babysitting. Or mentoring teens. Or God might just have a different calling for them. Both callings (christians with or without children) are equally valid ways of living. I hope we can speak more about this topic too that there is nothing wrong with you if you do not have children. There are so many couples that suffer because of the belief that their lives are incomplete without children. The church can be a healing place for them if they are valued just as much as people with children.
Thank you for emphasizing how my life isn’t less than bc I chose to break the cycle of addiction neglect incest and abandonment by not having children.
Religion makes me feel so bad about this
I am the oldest of 7 and this sermon is so spot on for us!!! Keep these coming!!! 🙏🏻✨🙌🏻
You've nailed it again, Pastor Mark. Keep it comin'!!! Keep sounding the alarm and people will have no choice but to wake up one day \0/ Praise the Lord!!!
So eye opening! Definitely had some ouch moments 😅
In single mom homes, mom sometimes turns the son into her substitute spouse and emotional incest occurs.
This is often the case in black families.
...real world application of the word.....!!!!!
So so so Good
Keep it up sir
Amen!!
The dad in the grandma scenario desperately needed to learn how to lead his home and not to allow his wife to run the show i.e. making decisions to move in grandma without him being in agreement about it. It's okay to want to help but to also acknowledge that you are on over your head and don't have the capabilities to do it with your own family to raise and care for
💛🙏🏻
What if it’s me?
My whole family has rejected me; Thank you God for Jesus, My personal Savior!!
Leave and Cleave? This is parenting class. 😊
So you know my family? LOL. You described my family of origin to a tee. A family so dysfunctionally & religiously enmeshed my parents refused to give their permission for my eldest sister to marry her Jewish (heritage) boyfriend, then still refused to attend their wedding after he converted to Catholicism so they could marry in the RC church. Then once she gave birth to their first grandchildren my mom got really nasty about expecting them to give our family priority access over the SIL’s “Jewish” family. Dad was more accepting of his ethnically Jewish SIL saying, “he’s good with money", and helpful in getting a good deal by “Jewing the price down”. Dad only cared that his daughters marry good enough men who can provide for her. It was our mom who was perpetuating the enmeshment with a vengeance.
I'm curious to know what happened to Grandma? Did another family member, or members step up to take more responsibility and lighten the load? Or was Grandma abandoned to a Senior center where she was forgotten except for holidays????? What ACTUALLY happened to the real Grandma in this scenario?
I would love to know. He nailed my family dynamics totally. It is a huge strain on my marriage. This sermon is my family to a exact tee.
What the hell happened to my moms mother instincts? 🤨
She had me and was STILL selfish 😒
Enmeshment is a thing 😢
Please remember that single moms can invite Jesus in as their husband.
Okay to be fair, and give a lil context, in Italy and most of Southern European countries millenials cannot find a job and if they do it’s heavily underpaid and rent or house prices are extremely high, way worse than America. Most jobs hardly get a 1000€/month and rents are about a 1000€/month. Very far away with salaries in America no less than 65k a year. Sometimes we need to get into the reality and not think that all places lives like in America, because that’s wrong and far from the reality
I am not saying it’s not wrong but it’s heavily difficult for a guy on his 20s to move out his parent’s house, if not impossible, in countries like Italy or Spain. Of course not justifying those who don’t provide for their parents or help in the house, we must contribute until we find a spouse and move on, and of couse, be a man. But just for you to know, it’s heavily difficult for us to get independent in our 20s and it’s really sad to be honest
Whoa there’s tons of salaries here that pay well under 65k. I make less than 40k and that’s with working overtime too. The county I live in, the average yearly salary is 50k, but the average cost of a single family home is upwards of 800k! It’s becoming increasingly difficult to afford living in the USA too, although it does vary by state. I happen to live in a place that is overly expensive, especially rent and the prices of homes. I think if someone is going through financial hardships and has to live with family, like in Italy, there’s nothing wrong with doing that for a time and especially if one is contributing to bills and groceries, and helping to maintain where they live. I think pastor Mark talks about it more in the sense of grown people who refuse to work or contribute or help clean or do anything at all.
@@A_Pie323 consider yourself blessed to have a gig that pays you 25k a year here. Around 20k after taxes of course
Well said.
I traveled the world as a missionary and now when I return to the US and see this irrational hyper fixation on complete independence of adult children I find it to be monstrous and alienating. Everyone works and lives together in other countries tries in multigenerational homes. There is far greater emotional support and the family helps each member basically until they get married and even after getting married sometimes it is absolutely necessary to live with the now extended family.
Mark seems to miss how damaging the Get Out of the House at 18 motif is. Get a job yes. Get out of the house? No.
The prodigal son story reveals multigenerational families as well.
You get what you vote for😮