Is 2nd Marriage Okay For Men? | Eram Saeed
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- Опубліковано 31 тра 2022
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2nd marriage has been one of the most debated topics of society, especially in Islam. Here, Eram speaks on this matter and clarifies several points regarding it including:
1. Men's right to having several wives.
2. The terms men must comply with when marrying again.
3. If the emotions of the first wife / wives is important.
4. The reason why 2nd marriage is a right to men in Islam.
If you or someone you know is facing circumstances of 2nd marriage, this video will help you see things in a more objective manner, and to become aware of the perspectives of all parties invloved. Keep watching ⬇
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#secondmarriage #marriagesecondmarriageinislam #secondmarriageafterdivorce #emotionsofthefirstwife #marryingagain
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Zindagi mein pehle baar Kisi nay wo example de Jo main sochte hoon
And to add in it Hazoor didn't get married second wife when he was married to Bibi Khadija
Thank you so much
But this hadith e paak is not applicable on ummah its only hazrat Fatima radi Allaahu anha because she was jannah ki sardar hongi but quran says
Surah nisa ayat 3
فَانْكِحُوْا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِّنَ النِّسَآءِ مَثْنٰى وَ ثُلٰثَ وَ رُبٰعَۚ-فَاِنْ خِفْتُمْ اَلَّا تَعْدِلُوْا فَوَاحِدَةً
تو ان عورتوں سے نکاح کرو جو تمہیں پسند ہوں ،دو دو اور تین تین او ر چار چار پھر اگر تمہیں اس بات کا ڈرہو کہ تم انصاف نہیں کرسکو گے تو صرف ایک (سے نکاح کرو)...
@@sidrakhan4514 یہ آیت تو یہ بھی کہہ رہی ہے کے ان عورتوں سے نکاح کرو جو پسند ہوں۔
تو Erum Saeed@ سے سوال یہ ہے کے یہ سوچنا کے پہلی میں کوئی کمی ہو، (مزاج کی خرابی، بانجھ پن وغیرہ) تو اسی صورت میں مرد حق بجانب ہے دوسری شادی کا، قرآن کے منافی ہونے کے ساتھ ساتھ، کیا یہ بھی misogyny کی ہی ایک قسم نہیں؟
Doesn't it also make a woman appear like a replaceable commodity should any defect appear?
@@sidrakhan4514 this is a permission not an order and there is a condition applying in the end of the Ayat... distinguish the difference please
Many married women live unhappily throughout their lives and they cant opt for second marriage coz of the stigma attached to it and no options available
To the point and very well explained, whoever disagrees has their own interests and reasons.
Well said . I really appreciate your point of view
Excellent Eram Saeed. Men used religion only to get 2nd married. Mine is same story my husband had no money when i married with him, i was paying for him. after some years later i support him and he become a wealthy , the first thing he want with me to give him permeation for second marriage and he don't want the divorce, i was not agree it is not the religion that i was not agree it is the support i did all his business and the money he have he never follow the religion. End of my story he got married i divorce him now my ex regret want to contact me but i block him from my life.
U made a great decision... Taking stand for urself is most important
More power to you..proud of u
May Allah give u better ...inshaAllah ...ur so strong ...may Allah make me easy for me
میری ساری بہنوں نے اس بات کو بہت سراہا ہے کہ انہوں نے طلاق لی اور ہمیشہ کے لئے الگ ہوگئ ہیں اگر چہ وہ طلاق نہیں دینا چاہتا تھا۔
آپ ماڈرن ہیں سائنسی تحقیقات کو مانتی ہیں ۔کیا مذہب سے ہٹ کر سائنس نے ثابت نہیں کیا کہ مرد کی جنسی ضرورت عورت سے زیادہ ہوتی ہے۔اگر کوئ اور بات نہ ہو تو کیا وہ اپنی ضرورت کے لئے دوسری شادی نہیں کر سکتا؟؟؟؟
@@BinHassanFarms 4 shadian karsakta hai usko ijazat hai, aor jab bv pregnant hojaiy tu usko kahay mujhay bacha nahi chahiay abortion karo mien kharcha nahi uthaion ga.aor bv ki koi zimedari bhi na nibhata ho tu Jo shohar na islam ko manta ho na us mien koi insanon walli khaslat ho tu aap aisay shohar k sath rehna chahti ho tu ye aap ki marzi hai. Islam mien aorat ko pora ikhtyr hai wo apna faisla karsakti hai.
I really love your work and videos👍 Keep doing it!
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻no words can compliment this video👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻Hat’s off to u dear Eram🌹🌹🌹
Fantastically explained. Well done 👏🏼
Very nice video!! I thank Allah that I got a chance to took her transformation course! She is absolute gem of a person! Lots of love & prayers to Eram
Your many points i got it snd you clarify many thing and give very positive message
Most logical point of view on this topic! 👏👏👏
Beautifully summarized.
Beautifully elaborated for the first time in this era by a woman . Proud of you, bravo!
Maa shaa Allah! And Jazakillah khairan kaseera
You are such an intelligent person ma shaa ALLAH! And your challenges are so daring...
I'm Dr Iram
I really want to appreciate the discussion and content you shared. I'm really impressed.
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻💖💖Thank you the video
Spot on ! ❤
Thanks for speaking up so boldly on this topic
Fantastic!
A very balanced point of view regarding this issue. First and foremost state of women in our society needs change. That will only happen through education and financial independence. So they have something else to look forward to apart from their majazi khuda. Keep their minds busy too , which is great for mental health. Our women are physically and emotionally drained. All of that needs to improve , then we can possibly move towards these scenarios.
No one can become financially independent.
Thank you Ma'am. Thank you.
This video make me cry hard ...so true so true the pain im going through is more then cutting my skin after my divorce....im not done anything wrong with anyone but i dont know y its happen ...im not human im not have heart i dont...everybody is jus saying pls have patience but they dont give me my right and etc ...may Allah give justice to all women who are divorce jus for nothing ...ameen
Sister please dont feel sad. I know its hard but sometimes Allah gives us trials. And when He ends one thing , He opens another door. Please have patience and work on your self. Start praying, if you want to study or work then start doing that. Exercise and make yourself healthy and fit. In sha Allah will open new doors for you. But keep praying and stay busy and positive. Protect your mental health please.
@@bekind913 thanku so much ...its really mean to me ...infact everyone is telling me the same but im unable u focus bcz of this incidence its very hard to move on ....but im trying may Allah open another door for me ameen....and thanku so much dear im feeling good after reading ur comment ..
Sometimes ALLAH wrote a plan for us to get something in which you have to cross certain painful incident. So IN SHA ALLAH you will get good after pain. I experienced n firmly believe that there is not 'NO' for ALLAH.
@@toconsult4917 thanku so much dear ...its really give me some hope
@@Miyamithu77 u will find a better husband pray to allah
Much needed discussion
August 9th, 2023
Jazakillahu khaair Erum ji.
Sending hugs and loads of prayers.
You just came like an angel at this hour when I was feeling literally helpless.
Jazakillahu khaair 🤧♥️
I was waiting for someone to open up about inequalities against women. This video is a reference for me.
Very well said
Unexplainable respect from Canada 🇨🇦
You are one of the rare voices of reason in this mad mad world. I always feel solace, listening to your sane arguments and solutions as well as your courage to show the mirror to the minions.
Such a blessing you are, at times I feel that Allah SWT has chosen you as a means of his hidayat to us. May Allah grant you jaza for your altruistic mission. We heal under your guidance and voice of truth.
You always speak the truth, that's why many people get upset. Only because of our gender, we have to suffer so much, and after all that, we are not allowed to talk about it.
As always, beautiful and unbiased explanation. Ma sha Allah
Well said 👌👌
There should be more than just a one like option for this video.... today you speak my heart out ❤️
Very impressive ❤️
Thank you ❤️
Need to know , Peace of Heart,Mind & a good ideal life If we have 100 doors, ways to pick to go , Chances& choices
Where compromise, where shares.We wish all Muslims to enjoy lives in a modest ways .
Good explanation
Excellent 👍🏼
Thank you so much ma'am for being voice of women. I wish one day I'll also do this sacred job. I am also frutrated by men in every religious feild and making laws for women which are against women and forcing them on women. But I hopw when women realize it they will remove it.
Very well explained, your words have given voice to many women who are unable to explain there emotions, women are not toys to be played with, they are complete human beings with heart to feel and mind to think...may Allah give hidayat to men to understand this matter, in our deen it is said that breaking someone heart is equivalent to killing someone...Allah can never allow something that causes extreme pain and distress to someone.
Allah k ahkaam par pain hoti hai and hurt hoti hain aap females
Jb mard aurat ko jawab nhi dy skty tou beech mein Allah ko ly aty hai...Allah ky tou mardo pr bhi bht sy ahkaam hain...rasta woh ikhtiar kiya jata hai jis mein kisi ke dil azari na ho.
@@hycollectionahkam? Aik se Zaid shadi koi hukm ni h !
Just a random comment but I love your suit! Such a gorgeous blue colour looks beautiful on you 💙
Very wisely you did
Honestly, I can't thank you enough for this. Thankyou for speaking on behalf of all women. GOD BLESS YOU!
Once again much needed fact. Thanks for shared such info for this pathetic society.
Excellent content..i need personalised guidance on a really serious matter.. how can i book a session with you?
How great she is❤
My therapist works with a man with mutiple wives. He told me its nothing but a giant headache
Your therapist shouldn't be talking about his clients like this.
Very informative
Buht zabrdst aap nai mery dil ki bat buht behtreen tareqy se biyan ki hai
Very well said even my case is totally opposite but I am agreed
Respect to all womens.
The debate is Islamic values VS Cultural values. Our religion is Islam but our culture, values, mindset, lifestyle aren't for the most part.
First time indo pak mein ye issue phli baat uthane wali first woman subhanallah 🌹💐💐
Wonderful
Great MashaAllah ❤
Jazak'Allah khair and Sister plz put English translation for wider audiences.
Though I agree with you partially but Bibi Fatima’s (RA) case was different. Hazrat Ali(RA) came up with the option of a non-muslim and Nabi Kareem(SAW) said that my daughter and a daughter of a disbeliever cannot live together.
I do agree, Sahil Adeem always do injustice to women when it comes to 4 marreige,one side he is saying he is a feminist n other side wanted to ruin the life of a woman.
I really shamed on him, ye baat karte hai deen ki mager biwio ki hukook ki baat khabhi nahi kahte hamesa kahte hai ki kamao jabki aurat ko kamane nahi kha hai allah ne ,yahi to equality hai jo do biwio ke beech justice karna hai. Financial , emotional n physical.
This is what I was thinking when sahil adeem replied that woman …
No doubt he z doing a great work …but here I 100% agree with u …❤️
But after this video she did a video with him on the same topic n almost agree with him ... For some reason they all seem to be on this mission for normalising 4 marriages but it's gonna mess us up even more
JazakAllah mam ,,,,, Kash is society ki ankhaun Khul Jain
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 bhaad mein jaane do your work honestly
Mam please make vid on women second marriage after divorce and our society perspective.
Allah aap ko izat sy nawazy aaj aap ny haq bat kahi
I love the way of your explaining
mery sath b same situation hui...
Mard nahi manty , mard khud ko sahi kehty hn... mard k nazdeek aourat ki feelings, emotions ki koi ehmiat nae hoti...
Ap bohat acha bolti hn.. Mashallah
Ap meri ideal hn.. love you
Allah aap ko ajer de ajj aap k baatain ne mere dill se aik boht bara pather utar pheka he mard islam k naam pe jo khajer orat ki zaat me ghonptey wo naqabil e berdasht he koi to he jo iss baat ko samjhta he 😢boht c dua aap k liye
Impressive
What a nice lady you are.
Simply the best Mashallah.
💯 true 👍
Beautiful lady💕
آپ کی باتیں بخوبی غور اور پسندیدگی کے ساتھ سنتا ہوں
Zabardast jawab ❤
She is talking about sahil. And it’s true. He did it.
Sahil brother , has more wisdom than Eram sister
Prophet May Peace be Upon Him, married Hazrat Khdija RA at the age of 25 while she was 40 years old.She was widow of 2 husband already.
Prophet SAWW did not marry another woman in her life.She was 64/5 and HE SAWW was almost 50 at the time of her death.
A 25 year old young man remained with a single wife till HIS SAWW 's 50 s.
Can any Muslim today offer such an example?
Even Hazrat Ayesha RA felt jealous of Hazrat Khadija RA though she was not alive seeing how much PROPHET SAWW loved & missed her.
7:23 Sahaba (R.A) Ke Muashrey Me Orat Ko Talaq Ho Jati Thi Ya Orat Bewa Ho Jati Thi To Orat Ko Koi Dar Nahi Hota Tha Ke Usko Daagh Daar Ya Eeb Daar Samajhkey Side Pe Kar Diya Jaey Ga Balkey Unki Shadiyaan Foran Ho Jati Thi Lekin Ab Indo-Pak Sub Continent Me Log Kehtey Hain Ke Talaq Orat Ke Liye Mot Se Bhi Badtar Hai Or Hamarey Muashrey Me Bewaon Ki Hesiyat To Talaq Yafta Oraton Se Bhi Nichey Hai Or Hamara Deen To Kehta Hai Ke Bewa Ko Protect Karo Yatimo Ko Protect Karo Or Wo Hum Nahi Kartey To Hamen Bhi Chahiye Ke Hum Sahaba (R.A) Ki Tarhan 2 ' 3 ' 4 Shadiyaan Karen Takey Sab Oraton Ki Shadiyaan Hon Or Talaq Yafta Or Bewa Ki Bhi Shadi Ho Or Hum Bewa Or Uskey Yatimo Ko Protect Kar Saken !.....'
Always a pleasure to listen to you. But pardon… Hazrat Ali A.S never wanted to remarry till Bibi Fatima A.S was alive…
Love you sister you are great men talk about Islam they even never read Quran with meaning just listen what they want to listen sorry to say they give roti to women they treat like they are owner the women. They forget Allah
Empowered women become more attractive to men as they want to fulfill their duty to "control" her 🤣🤣 How narcissiatic our culture is. And these maulvees would NEVER talk about this hadith of what happened in the matter of Ali(ra) second marriage. Seriously.
Coz this shariah its not applicable on ummah its only for her coz she is khatun e jannah
@@sidrakhan4514 Wait Deen is not applicable to one but to another? Very weak point
Like wives of prophet saw are not allowed to marry after prophet saw. Other Muslim women can marry. Like sadqa isn't allowed to sadaat but is allowed to other people.
Mashallah you are so amazing 😍 I love the way you explain everything. And you are not taking the side of men or women you just speak truth.👍❤️
True
Eram love you ❤️
Sister let me correct you here about quoting the the example of Respected Bibi Fatima May Allah's blessings be upon her, that our prophet told hazrat Ali not to go for second marriage because he wanted to marry the daugthter of Abu Jahal. The complete incident is that the prophet PBUH said to Hazrat Ali " Ye munasib nahi lagta k dushman e islam ki beti or nabi ki beti ek sath us ghar main hon" . Also, if we see the living example of the prophet himself, he took only one maiden wife and remaining 10 were divorced or widowed.
How to contact you?
If both the wives become enemies of one another ,what's man's fault is in it???
What about compassion of women towards men when there is a lot of fitnah outside.
U think Allah wasn't compassionate to women when allowed polygamy..naoozuBillah.
You are a woman also just think If your husband you brother in law and your father goes for second marriage how would you fell? Will you support your father and ask your mother to have sabr and accept the seond wife and will it be ok for you to accept the second wife of your father.
Our Holy Prophet’s life is the example for us which Allah said us to follow. He didn’t married in the presence of our bibi khadija RS. Because he didn’t want to hurt her.
Later he married multiple but there were reasons for that. Not like He liked a girl and married her. He was giving support to divorce women widow women. Which he wanted to set example for men to support widow and divorce women. Not to marry just because he is fed up of first wife.
V good
So What's the conlusion, If someone can afford he can go and marry, If not he can't.
Zabardast 👌 👌
same yar ur eye opner
Mam Zayadahtar second marrige affair ki wajah se hi hoti hai or ismaiin doosri aurat ka or husband ka hi kusoor hota hai. Kahawat hai na ki aurat hi aurat ki dushman hoti hai
I think here you’re talking about sahil adeem.
SubhanAllah
Assalamu alaikum...mam you are great
Assalam o alaikum wr wb! Ma'am if you don't mind I suggestion is it possible ek esa platform bnayie Ap sadqa jaria platform jaha pr Ap achi family se related girls n groom add kren jaha logo ko approach kren ek asani ki ek koshish kr sakte Hai think about it! please sochiye ga divorced n widow girls n groom n 2nd marriage mature responsible logo ko milane k liye sochiye ga ye zrort hai Aj k in halat e nazuk me Ap jese log ek step uthae gy too boht cheeze zyada Nahi thora too involvement zrori Hai.
jazzakllah o khairahh
I rarely listen to any motivational speaker,but i regard your way of explaining thing.Thanks so very much.
Also i can debate(My opinion,without making any one opinion wrong) on more then ONE marriage in any given time is written any where in Quran Shareef.....It is not written any where in Quran Shareef.
It is/was rather suggested at ONE given moment or occasion.
I also believe that happy and perfect family is always with ONE wife ONLY........Secondly,why would in the world a woman desire to marry a MEN/MAN when she knows that he is already married and have more then ONE wife..?Who is forcing her.?
Having more then ONE wife is a disaster waiting to happen.
Can I ask u please q aurat k liye dosri aurat ko bear krna mushkl hota hai???
true:)
Great women❤❤❤❤❤
I think categorising all women in our society as oppressed is too much generalisation. Ours is a class based society. Women from lower classes are definitely oppressed but so our the men from those classes. Women from elite classes are quite powerful and independent. I guess in that case if men go for second marriage it should be ok!
But i do agree most male scholars lack empathy for women…. Probably we need more females scholars :) women in islam were very powerful.. i think the reason we loved drama serial Ertugral was because it depicted very strong women in islam. Those women had great political sense, were physically strong, were running the economy… not the touch-me-not type heroines of most rom-com Pakistani dramas…
Divorcees can approach polygynous men, what do you think about that?
The issue still remains very biased towards married women and does not look upon a practicing single women who finds it hard to find a husband who is upon the deen! So if a practicing man who is married seeks to take a second wife then the first wife should have no objections because their household practices Islam!
Our biggest example is the Prophet swt we should learn from example of the women in his life, his wives each held a different character yes jealous amongst women is natural! We have seen so many bad examples of marriages that every side becomes biased, everyone second marriage of a man is seen as bad or the second wife as evil and the first wife as a victim ! If we understood the true meaning of a man marrying a second wife then we would be more at peace! A lot of women are happy to turn a blind eye knowing that their husbands maybe having affairs with many women but the moment he speaks of marriage to a second wife they don’t like it and it hurts more why?? Wouldn’t it be better for the husband to take on a second wife and you knowing who it is rather than not knowing how many he has been with?? Surely the option of a second wife would then sound better!
The harsh reality of todays society is we have complicated the religion because we follow customs of culture which is mixed between different countries and as a society people have become selfish and only remember Islam when it suits them and only bits of Islam that benefits them! As long as it don’t affect them then they don’t care what others go through! So when we can become better people and have compassion for one another then we would understand Allah has made many things permissible and there is hikma behind it!
Women need to learn to strength their imaan! Once their love for Allah is greater than any love for anyone she will have the confidence and independence to know that Allah will take care of all matters so if anything comes towards her it’s because she is able to bare and cope with it as Allah will not burden any soul with more than he or she can bare!
By the way your statements are very biased and against women completely.here you are favouring patriarchy and masculinity