Valerie Harper’s Husband Refuses To Put Her In Hospice Despite Doctors’ Suggestion

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  • Опубліковано 25 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 110

  • @janinem5196
    @janinem5196 4 роки тому +1

    That first 20 seconds were gut-wrenching to watch. So intensely personal. Bless them both.

  • @clarkclarke
    @clarkclarke 5 років тому +11

    I am happy for her ....she said her good byes and transitioned with the people she loved and who loved her around her ....
    THANK YOU Tony ..

  • @rnrdoughgirl1586
    @rnrdoughgirl1586 5 років тому +35

    Rest in Peace Valerie, you will be missed. My thoughts and prayers are with Tony.

  • @3QMARTI660
    @3QMARTI660 5 років тому +7

    Good for him, taking care of her ,. She left with dignity

  • @elizasmith5201
    @elizasmith5201 5 років тому +8

    My thoughts and prayers go to her husband. He will miss her for a long time. He was the husband that a woman wants. He knows he had the best. She was a beautiful person inside and out. I hope people give him the time he needs to grieve in his own way.

  • @deballen6241
    @deballen6241 5 років тому +11

    I didn't want to call hospice for my mother. We did tho eventually. Within 8 hours she had a hospital bed, a bed side commode and a nurse on call. It was really a relief to have them there with us. I'm not sure what I had expected but they were very kind and loving to all members of the family and not at all intrusive. Mom wanted to be at home and she was. I really respect and admire those that work for hospice, they are a blessing in a time when you need one.

  • @GB-kr6gy
    @GB-kr6gy 5 років тому +3

    Yes Tony, I did the same as you, for both my parents. We made a pact to always care for each other, till the end. My father was a total skeleton when he died. He wanted to be at home & I wanted to be by his side. Like myself, I'm sure you found it a great honor to be with Valarie, as I did with my father, holding him to the very end. Thank you for doing the same. Valarie brought so much joy to the world. May she rest in God's loving arms, & may you find peace in her laughter & in God's great love. Many blessings!

  • @ervincone5598
    @ervincone5598 5 років тому +16

    Not only is tony Cacciotti a good man. He’s a good husband a loyal and love husband. He was lucky enough to find the love of his life. Most men’s and women’s go through life not knowing or having that kind of love that tony and valerie had for each other.a love that he will never find again with any other woman. My condolences. Ya and valerie were and are two of great ones

    • @getagava2912
      @getagava2912 5 років тому +1

      Ervin Cone so true.

    • @lindalamm2291
      @lindalamm2291 5 років тому +1

      she was blessed to have a great husband by her side,

  • @donaldmcauliffe7653
    @donaldmcauliffe7653 5 років тому +4

    You did it your way with a smile you pass on to everyone you knew

  • @bettycogswell9851
    @bettycogswell9851 5 років тому +3

    Her and Tony were so blessed to have found each other. Thanks for all the laughs Valerie. You were loved and will be missed. Say hi to Mary for me...

  • @brucefichelson9117
    @brucefichelson9117 5 років тому +18

    Hospice can also help keep her at home by helping her husband.

  • @marygraham3189
    @marygraham3189 5 років тому +4

    Thank God Tony kept her at home. He's a good man.

  • @cynthiahawkins2389
    @cynthiahawkins2389 5 років тому +2

    When our mother was in her last week of life (she died of old age and dementia at 95), at one point there was a question of calling 911 and whether or not we would do that. We decided that she was dying a natural death at home in her own bed, which she had expressed a wish to experience. So, my sister and I made her comfortable, kept her clean, and let the sounds of life go on in the house. The very best hospital/hospice is STILL a hospital, hospice. Fluorescent lights, machines, beds cranking up and down, PA systems in the hall, monitors beeping. Ugh. Tony bravely took a stand, and acted for his beloved wife. (And hey, we all loved Valerie, too!). Good man.

  • @tressmetressme
    @tressmetressme 5 років тому +4

    I love stories about good loving marriages, and there's nothing better than a loving supportive husband especially for a wife who deserves him:)
    God Bless them both, afterall the two are one!

  • @karenhallman6342
    @karenhallman6342 5 років тому +2

    Wow! What a great man!, and my thoughts are with you, Tony...they made the best decision for both of them. My Ma died from a rare form of cancer (CLL) in just five weeks, never having been sick before, and through life's circumstances we lived together all my life (which was 50 years - she had her first 26 on her 'own') so it wasn't just losing a mother - but it almost felt like losing a 'spouse' as well. They kept her in the hospital for a month, trying to save her (and she was so 'strong' all her life, she wasn't ready to let 'go') but it ended up her body just gave out ( but her mind was SHARP) and her last wish (before she went into a coma) was to have the peace, quiet and caring of a hospice...no more noise, tests and 'fussing'...and I did that for her (although it was HARD to let her go...in some ways) so that last week in hospice I was with her every day...and was with her when she 'left' at 2:30 AM...so, I hope she has peace now...and maybe 'met' up with Valerie somewhere beyond the clouds...we both loved her and 'Rhoda' always...and always had great laughs together watching her...Rest in Peace, Valerie...With Love Always, Karen

  • @EclecticBrownGirlTV
    @EclecticBrownGirlTV 5 років тому +10

    God Bless Valerie Harper and her family...

  • @karenmyers858
    @karenmyers858 5 років тому +1

    Wow I have so much respect for this wonderful man. He's a one off type of human being. This is what true love looks like and sticking to his marriage vows. I'm praying for him after such a loss of Valerie. RIP xxx

  • @judithbiller3732
    @judithbiller3732 5 років тому +13

    My Mum had many end-of-life issues, and we were able to keep her home. Hospice care came to the house.

    • @MTknitter22
      @MTknitter22 5 років тому +1

      Judith Biller Yes that really is a wonderful option.

  • @m.e.d.7997
    @m.e.d.7997 5 років тому +1

    Val was a one in a million person from what I have seen.

  • @kimdeems1240
    @kimdeems1240 5 років тому +11

    you made me laugh..you truly will be missed. you had such spunk and a lot of fire..love you girl.. thanx for the laughs..I'm sure Mary is excited to see.you.. best friends together again

    • @erinwillits9085
      @erinwillits9085 5 років тому +4

      Very well said..i admired her so much..thiis one stung a little...like i lost a good friend..and u found the right words so thank you😢

  • @MTknitter22
    @MTknitter22 5 років тому +4

    There are others also who KNOW their loved one and its their choice about the hospice. Especially when the family is well off financially, they can do many comfort measures. Bless you Tony and Val 💕💕

  • @leeteplitz7673
    @leeteplitz7673 5 років тому +2

    Tony truly loved and adored, true love till the end🌹❤️🌹

  • @candycanupp9954
    @candycanupp9954 5 років тому +6

    Love her so much. She has made me laugh and cry. God bless her and her husband.

  • @erinwillits9085
    @erinwillits9085 5 років тому +6

    RIP VALERIE YOU WILL SO MUCH BE MISSED IN OUR HEARTS... I HAVE LOVED YOU EVER SINCE I WAS A KID..THIS IS SO HARD TO ACCEPT RIGHT KNOW..PRAYERS TO THE FAMILY...HEAVEN GOT A NEW ANGEL 😢😢😧

  • @SSsmith24
    @SSsmith24 5 років тому +1

    I’m So very sorry her family all lost her,, what a great gal,, TY for the memories,, RIP Valerie

  • @kathysharpe7339
    @kathysharpe7339 5 років тому +2

    That's what a real husband does
    💙💙

  • @hughhaefner5486
    @hughhaefner5486 5 років тому +2

    Wow. Powerful words she said. What an inspiration she is, was. Amazing.

    • @viescotty3577
      @viescotty3577 5 років тому

      Yes. Don't go to the funeral until the day of the funeral.
      My mom who also passed of cancer says: live, love while you can; mourn when you have to.

  • @lisabullock7461
    @lisabullock7461 5 років тому +2

    What a great marriage, wonderful partner, and husband RIP Valerie ☮💜✝️ Condolences to Tony and your family, friends and colleagues, and fans 🙏💙

  • @TheColor17
    @TheColor17 5 років тому +3

    THANKS for the LAUGHTER & fine examples You shared with Your fans, especially on Rhoda. You are my Fashion Guru! The 70's are back because of Your Fashion Sense. Peace is within us because Life is Eternal. LOVE, a tearful fan. What a Beautiful couple You & Tony. Peace be with You Tony.

    • @bridgetnolan3947
      @bridgetnolan3947 4 роки тому

      So true. Love humour, her self- deprecating wise cracks ,her fashion sense. I am watching Rhoda for the 3rd time in 6 months. It has helped me with great sadness in my life.
      Rest in Peace lovely lady.

  • @linanicolia1363
    @linanicolia1363 5 років тому +1

    Very moving. I agree with him as he likely could take better care of her than strangers would. It is good to pass in your own home instead of some hospice. Terrific woman with a great attitude and a wonderful husband who loved her so much. They will meet again, for sure.

  • @aaronlewis735
    @aaronlewis735 5 років тому +14

    I'm happy that you experience love on this Earth in this way. I will not and many others will not

    • @joannakemp3710
      @joannakemp3710 5 років тому +4

      God loves you Aaron.

    • @aaronlewis735
      @aaronlewis735 5 років тому +3

      @@joannakemp3710 wow if you live in Portland I want to meet you

    • @joannakemp3710
      @joannakemp3710 5 років тому +3

      I live in tornado alley so we know how to pray and talk to God!

    • @steveprice448
      @steveprice448 5 років тому +2

      I totally understand as I too am without a human on Earth.

    • @joannakemp3710
      @joannakemp3710 5 років тому +1

      @@steveprice448
      I pray you find someone wonderful.

  • @carolbenson6524
    @carolbenson6524 5 років тому +2

    One of my favorite people. Sad she didn't make it!

    • @linanicolia1363
      @linanicolia1363 5 років тому +1

      She made it many years after her lung cancer.....dying at 80 is very acceptable. The brain cancer was also handled for some time.

  • @weedweaver943
    @weedweaver943 4 роки тому +1

    Hospice is a God send. No one should feel bad about using it. You can always go off hospice when you improve. Using hospice doesn't mean you're giving up, it means you're getting help.

  • @lucylucky8028
    @lucylucky8028 5 років тому +1

    Very handsome and caring man....YOU CAN TELL!

  • @suzeauster2223
    @suzeauster2223 5 років тому +3

    R.I.P. 🌈 Precious Val 💐 Gone to Glory🌈
    God broke the mold with You and Tony 💕Mightily 🌈

  • @janpastien4510
    @janpastien4510 5 років тому +1

    What a nice man you got wish i could fine one like that they are hard to fine now days .hope you get beter soon .

  • @surfergirlmaui9069
    @surfergirlmaui9069 5 років тому +2

    Thanks Val!!!!!!!!!!

  • @patmelton43
    @patmelton43 5 років тому +2

    I certainly understand and empathize. My husband died after a long period of Alzheimer's. It is so very hard. Hospice did not help me with my sick husband. Glad they are there for some but they were not there for me.

    • @SSsmith24
      @SSsmith24 5 років тому

      Pat Melton I’m so very very sorry 😢

    • @linanicolia1363
      @linanicolia1363 5 років тому

      people with dementia no longer know where they are and with whom so, hospice could be validated for them. Valerie was alert and brilliant to the last breath, I expect, so making her comfortable would have been something her husband could do. Alzheimer gets very difficult for families as they get no feedback from their dying loved ones. That is very hard to deal with.

  • @nicolewhitebearclaws9867
    @nicolewhitebearclaws9867 5 років тому +1

    RIP this is so sad 😥

  • @jkwhite2164
    @jkwhite2164 5 років тому +1

    Valerie you have a great partner and Husband until the end.Bless Tony ..Valerie you are loved will be missed.Say hello to Mary from all your Fans.

  • @jannislewis13
    @jannislewis13 5 років тому +4

    Now that is a marriage. 😍🎆

  • @cac3343
    @cac3343 5 років тому

    You don't show someone how much you love them by refusing hospice care, it actually harms them by refusing the cares. They provide amazing comfort if allowed to help in these terrible terminal situations.

    • @linanicolia1363
      @linanicolia1363 5 років тому

      depends of the situation and the conditions towards the very end. Every case is different. I cannot imagine Valerie being harmed by the refusal of hospice care. I am sure her husband knew what he was doing and it was their mutual wish.

  • @woodyferrari1718
    @woodyferrari1718 5 років тому +1

    Damn Man!!!.. I just found out Valerie Harper past on..I thought she gonna beat that crap..my heart go out her and her family..RIP Rhoda..

    • @TempeSoldier123
      @TempeSoldier123 4 роки тому

      woody pope been under a rock or in solitary confinement in a prison? Geez 🤦🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️

  • @TheJanet4321
    @TheJanet4321 5 років тому +2

    Not sure why they didn't do home hospice. The patient usually suffers less on hospice, and often times improves for a while because they are getting good care. I hope those last weeks were ok for her.

  • @thenewctc
    @thenewctc 5 років тому +1

    I'm so GLAD Valerie had somebody that loved her so much that he said FUCK No I'm not putting her in hospice! Thanks Tony for caring so much for this women Millions Adore! We Miss you Val but thanks for all the great tv shows and movies you left us with to watch over and over.

  • @juliabel2
    @juliabel2 5 років тому

    They suggested I put my my husband in hospice 4 years ago, just before Thanksgiving, after removing him from dyalisys. I called all our children & grandchildren and had Thanksgiving on Saturday! He was with us 3 1/2 days as he slowly succumbed, and he was taken into the arms of his Saviour! It was a beautiful peaceful end at home with his family. The hospice nurse came the 1st night to make sure everything was being handled properly, of course. Hospice definitely has its place. But it isn't always necessary.

  • @georgie2315
    @georgie2315 5 років тому +1

    FANTASTIC 👍 HUSBAND WHO'S AS BELOVED AS VALERIE ❤️ U TONY!!!!!!💝💝💝💝💝

  • @FreedomFighter-cr5xg
    @FreedomFighter-cr5xg 5 років тому +2

    The National Health care system in Canada would have covered all the costs for her cancer treatment .. sad that in USA people have to beg for money in order to get treatment ..

  • @sandraramos5915
    @sandraramos5915 5 років тому +3

    Rip beautiful lady you will be missed 🍸🍸😢

  • @maryshelton3730
    @maryshelton3730 5 років тому

    Hospice is not giving up! It is making the patient more comfortable, with family councils get also! Please be informed!

  • @jdale1259
    @jdale1259 5 років тому +2

    My mother had hospice care in her house. That's the norm these days folks.

  • @markwhitman9029
    @markwhitman9029 Рік тому

    loved Valerie and she was very fortunate to have a loyal spouse with her to the end
    The majority of people don't

  • @lianelayman7577
    @lianelayman7577 5 років тому +5

    He did find out after a while that she could have hospice care in her house/

    • @oleysiaogren1192
      @oleysiaogren1192 5 років тому +2

      That's how my brother had it. Passed away on 4-6-19 two year of colon cancer and kidney failure.

    • @clarkclarke
      @clarkclarke 5 років тому

      @@oleysiaogren1192 My condolences to you and your family ... Glad you all honored his wishes.

  • @ginamir5829
    @ginamir5829 5 років тому +2

    I know what you are going through so sorry for your pain

  • @unaryan1979
    @unaryan1979 2 роки тому

    He did the right thing for her. Don't get me wrong I can't fall Hospice care and it is a fantastic service for terminal patients however its not for everyone. Some people want to spend their remaining days at home with their love ones and that in itself can be the best treatment too. My Aunt took care of my uncle at home until the day he passed as she knew it was what he wanted. She still tells me to this day that he was the love of her life and it was an honour to take care of him. She wanted to do it for him.

  • @danielr6567
    @danielr6567 5 років тому +5

    This really is a bad choice. I am a hospice worker. Hospice can provide care when your prognosis is less then six months. Signing her on does not mean she will die soon because of it. They are there to provide nurses, aids, counselors, chaplains all experts in this type of care to make sure she is comfortable and has all she needs such as medication, medical equipment, all paid for by hospice.
    I feel bad as he doesnt know what hospice is and is not. Most people don’t because most people dont talk about it.
    They can pick up on cues that she might be in pain, nonverbal ones that he may not recognize. Hospice has actual professionals trained in pain management to ensure she can be kept comfortable.
    I have cared for hospice patients that have been on hospice for over 3 years. But dadly people think hospice means death, like now, and its not.
    I hope everyone watching this tells their husband or wife or family what you would and would not want if you had six months left. As a counselor i have seen so many needless family arguments when a loved one was dying because they did not hsve this talk and ended up fighting over what should be done.
    Take the time to write it down and talk. You will save your family a ton of problems if you do.

    • @katespurlding9647
      @katespurlding9647 5 років тому +1

      Daniel R Why if her husband has the time and means too care for her shouldn't he keep her at home.

    • @katespurlding9647
      @katespurlding9647 5 років тому +2

      Daniel R Why if her husband has the time and means too care for her shouldn't he keep her at home..

    • @SSsmith24
      @SSsmith24 5 років тому

      Daniel R Bless all that work for hospice,, They were there in 1984 with my mom when she was dying,, they were real angels 👼🏻

    • @focusedfreebird
      @focusedfreebird 5 років тому

      Hospice doesnt pay for it. They are paid by medicare..etc.

    • @hughhaefner5486
      @hughhaefner5486 5 років тому

      Spoken like a hospice worker with a chip on the shoulder. My 2 experiences with hospice were a nightmare. I know mostly they do good with pain and sleep and rest but not in both cases of my brother in 94 and my mother in 2000. In patient hospice nurse was hitting herself up with the morphine shots not giving them to my brother. We filed complaint. My mother never even got hospice care because erroneously they deemed her to have more than 6 months to live, denying help in my home to take better care for comfort reasons. They called me, hospice that is 1 hour after my mother passed! Now they're ready to help me. Too late. So get off your high horse nurse ratchet. It ain't all perfume and roses.

  • @roseagaatsz8403
    @roseagaatsz8403 5 років тому

    Rip Valerie 🙏🏻this is true ❤️

  • @carriemoore4380
    @carriemoore4380 5 років тому

    God bless Valarie 👃👃❤️❤️ that's a great man right there...

  • @shortnotekerrie
    @shortnotekerrie 4 місяці тому

    Love you Valerie ❤❤❤❤

  • @aliceng5543
    @aliceng5543 5 років тому

    R.I.P Valerie 🙏🏻🙏🏻

  • @simonaivancic528
    @simonaivancic528 5 років тому +1

    Please, God keep them in Your hand

  • @thestreamoflife1124
    @thestreamoflife1124 5 років тому +1

    A great partner

  • @sandrag1194
    @sandrag1194 5 років тому

    A Good Man❣

  • @julianholguin1253
    @julianholguin1253 5 років тому

    Rest In Peace! You can be in hospice for years, hospice is the answer if you love someone!

  • @irisheyes4935
    @irisheyes4935 5 років тому +2

    There is nothing wrong with wanting to spend final days with your loved ones. Thats what she wanted also I am sure.

  • @unapologeticallyme8513
    @unapologeticallyme8513 5 років тому

    My mom and dad refuse to go into a nursing home or care facility they want to live their last days at home I'll make sure that happens no matter what I'll care for them who wants to die alone in a sterile hospital

  • @debbiegubala5429
    @debbiegubala5429 5 років тому

    Hospice can come to the home. They came when our 23 year old son was suffering with cancer...he died shortly after they arrived..

  • @manueladarazsdi9675
    @manueladarazsdi9675 5 років тому

    Goodbye Valerie... I loved you as Rhoda.

  • @cultfilmfreakreviews
    @cultfilmfreakreviews 5 років тому +1

    im right now watching him wrestle in the mud with burt reynolds

  • @boxcarent.3147
    @boxcarent.3147 4 роки тому +1

    Husband was in Longest Yard with Burt Reynolds

  • @ohdear4133
    @ohdear4133 5 років тому +3

    So, cant hospice come to the house, bc he wont be able to manage on his own.

    • @livelaughlove1259
      @livelaughlove1259 5 років тому +1

      S moby dick yes. Hospice went to my grandfather home to take care of him.

    • @robertward8130
      @robertward8130 5 років тому

      Yes.

    • @linanicolia1363
      @linanicolia1363 5 років тому

      You can have homecare coming to the house such as nursing assistants or LPN's that will perform basic hygiene to very heavy people that would be hard to move. Nurses are not necessary if there is good communication with the MD in charge of the case and narcotics are delivered as needed. I remember watching Farrah Faucett give herself her own morphine injections, towards the very end. Every situation is different. Some cases rely on the need of homecare while others do not.

    • @ohdear4133
      @ohdear4133 5 років тому

      @@linanicolia1363 Well she is gone now may her soul RIP.

  • @susansab7033
    @susansab7033 2 роки тому

    What great lose beloved ones

  • @luciarae4918
    @luciarae4918 5 років тому

    It's true? They ask money through crowdfunding?

  • @Hautecakes90210
    @Hautecakes90210 5 років тому

    Go Fund Me? They have/had lots on money smh

  • @bellasworld6019
    @bellasworld6019 5 років тому +1

    My mom dated tony cacciotti but they broke up my mom dated my dad and had me then broke up tony wanted to be my dad so he told the doctor that he was the dad of me so my last name is cacciotti . Bella cacciotti my mom was dating my step dad so my last name would have been chhatarpal but i like metts