I tried "Swedish Death Cleaning" (and it worked!)
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- Опубліковано 2 чер 2024
- Hey, guys! In today's video I took a big step and helped Charlie tackle his closet. I cleaned and organized the space (not something high on his priority list), and I uncovered lots of things that I just failed to deal with for years. I've been reading a lot about Swedish Death Cleaning and many of the goals really resonated with me, and I hope they help you think about decluttering in a new way. Enjoy!
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My decluttering technique is to watch an episode of Hoarders. After one show I'm ready to burn everything.
OMG yes!!!! Me too. Seriously. Reality TV is good for something
😂!
#FACTS
That’ll work! Lol! 👍🏾🤣
Jackies HomeSweetHome hmuo/
I was doing a KonMari cycle through the house and I spilled my drink. My question became, “If this were covered in red wine, would I try to save it?” It really helped with decision-making.
Wow that’s excellent!
That is an interesting question to ask! It puts the items into a great perspective for deciding about keeping it or not. I will have to try that out.
Actually this is a brilliant way to prioritize... love it.
hahhahaha!!!
You’re philosophical
When my sister died in a car accident I kept her shoes she was wearing while in the car. I kept many of her clothes as well. I got married & wherever I went they went with us. There was something about her belongings that I felt were attached to her & I just couldn't let go of.
Then after many years gone by, I cried very hard, then I let them go.
Hugs❣️
I'm so sorry for your loss.
But that is such a common and normal reaction. Then, when we're ready to let go, we do.
Mi. Zero b under your
Indeed, when the time is right.
This really hurt my heart. God bless you.
I took care of my Dad and Mom til they passed. They had 84 years of treasures and items they used to make life better and easier for 7 kids. Then I had to go through it all and donate, etc. I'm 68 and taking care of this job so my family will not have the burden. 😊
"Swedish death cleaning" is purging items out of lives before we die And Not wanting to burden our loved ones with a mountain of clutter and junk to go through after our death.
It's about doing it for our loved ones.
That is the concept of Swedish Death cleaning.
Thank you! Waited for that explanation all vid
Love it
My family is getting land, cars and money when I die. They can at least allow me to have the things I love around me. Otherwise I’ll donate everything to charity.
Artishealing65 Thank you! She said so much and yet so little!
Think I’ve got Swedish Death Cleaning virus.
I can appreciate that he said it "sparks necessity." My toothbrush doesn't necessarily "spark joy"...but I mean, I *need* it.
I also heard the question once: "Would I buy this again?" - the toothbrush is absolutely one such thing ^^
Yes but some people may have a box with 47 toothbrushes ....
People should be changing their toothbrushes out every three months, so they are something that is fine to stock up on
You both kinda missed the point on that one.
You want clean teeth right? Therefore it sparks joy... because if you didn’t have it, you would feel bad / dirty.
It’s the same for other things you need but don’t necessarily celebrate. If it gets the job done well, it sparks joy.
It just comes across as lack of understanding to be honest, but whatever works for you I guess 🤷🏽♀️.
KonMari has this idea that some items will not spark joy, but the result of having and using said item will spark job. Tooth brush may not spark job, but clean teeth and not needing dental work do spark joy.
You can always take a picture of stuff to hold onto the memory of the object without actually having the clutter in your home.
I do this!!! It helps a lot! But one time I lost a TON of photos I had taken and I cried so much. I don't have the best memory, so those objects help me recall things I don't know I remember. It was really heartbreaking to lose those pictures because unless something reminds me, those memories in those objects are lost forever to me 😔
What an INCREDIBLE idea ! Oh my God.
This really resonates with me. I'm 62 and my sister is 60. We have no children, just cousins in their 80s. Who's going to clean up after us?!
Also, sadly, my sis was diagnosed with alzheimer's 3 years ago. She had stopped cleaning. Her 3 bed house was a nightmare, a hoarder who NEVER gave away anything. Kept clothes from her 20s. Only last year did she allow me to start going through stuff. I've cleaned and donated loads. Some was recycled and some binned. I am exhausted and not done yet. Her paperwork was massive but luckily I'm her opposite and started loads of lever arch files.
I have a file called Death. I've prepaid my funeral, picked the hymns etc.
It's not morbid, I like being organised and don't want to be a burden when I'm gone.
My relationship with 'stuff' changed dramatically after I lost everything in a house fire.
My dad built the home I'd lived in all my life up until then. That was the hardest part.
Now I don't assign emotional attachment to anything. It drives my husband nuts that I am so quick to donate or toss just about anything. I'm not sure if I'm at a healthy place with that, but to be honest I don't think too much about it.
My Dad took his own life a few years after that fire. Now I look back on that house fire, at the time the hardest thing I had to go through, living out of a hotel room with my family, wearing nothing but donated clothing, the only place I felt at home being my truck.... I look back now and think that was nothing. Compared to what came next, it was nothing.
Things don't keep love alive. I have nothing but an old work shirt to remember my father by. But you know what? I don't even need that. The memories are what are precious. I remember the tree house he built us as kids. I remember the fairy tale garden he grew in the backyard when my husband asked him if he could marry me. The gazebo he built with our initials on the railing we said our vows in. I remember them with love and sadness. They don't need to be here with me for me to recall what an amazing man my father was, and how much he loved me.
House fires are a horrible event that teaches us that what's important is not things. I found out same as you. I have turned into a clutter bug again after many years, but I'm still good about just randomly donating things that have no use, purpose or reason. It's time again to go through and do it more. Yes memories are what matter most.
So sorry you went through that.
Your dad sounded like an amazing and sweet man. I’m so sorry for your loss.
I'm so profoundly sorry. That is my worst nightmare, x 2. I've spent a lifetime collecting delightful little pieces of art and remembering the hands that made them. Many of the people in my life have been less than kind to me, and all these things often make me much happier than many of my interactions with people. I can't imagine wanting to live if all this original art was destroyed. I adore my husband and cats and horses, and am very lucky to have them, but the idea of losing all the daily delights of art is so horrific I can't even imagine it.
Take photos so you can remember them! Write down why they’re special to you.
The one thing no one ever brings up is to stop buying stuff. We have enough.
I said the same thing just the other day. I was thinking of buying some clothes for summer but I realized I couldn't even get all the clothes I already have in my çloset.
I wish others would realise this
It's because we're constantly told (subliminally) that we NEED it. Personally I hate stuff lol I love a good throw out 🤾♀️
@@lola2837 yes!!!! I agree
@@lola2837 Absolutely
When my Mother went into a nursing home my sister and I were left to clean out our family home of 44 years. It was absolutely overwhelming. We ended up having an auction. It opened my eyes to all the things I had in my own home. I had a 2,200 sq foot home packed full.
I ended up selling my home and getting rid of probably 95% of my junk.
I now live in a 524sq foot apartment with very little and it’s amazing to be free of the stuff.
Same happened to me when mother died. Our childhood home packed full! We also did an auction and when I returned to my apartment (I live in another town) I started decluttering my things
I have been decluttering now for years. I started as a sloppy “pre-hoarding” mess. (I wasn’t so bad as to not see the floor, or not to be able to sleep in my own bed, but... I could definitely see myself decades later in that arena if I didn’t watch out!)
I held onto junk mail because I never had a place for it, let alone recycling. I held on to past life’s, like when I was a race horse owner breeder. I held onto to my mother’s/grandmother’s things to give to my daughter, “someday.” I was classic. I had many duplicates because what I couldn’t find , I bought again.
And, I bought stuff. I still do buy and I need to let that go too.
I got rid of at least half of my STUFF. I was on the that journey when I decided to move to be near my daughter. So I purged hard. There were donations, giving to friends and trips to the recycle center AND many trips to the dump (some of my important stuff was ruined in a large RV garage by the mice. Eek! But, as you know, some of us keep important stuff but don’t give it the respect it deserves.)
Today, I saw this video and I realized that the emotional journey has been worth it! I just moved again to be near my daughter.
I chose a home nearly 500 sqft smaller than my last place. Again, I purged. But, this time, I list my job in July(I was a tourism director snd as you know the majority of my industry is at zero) but had planned to retire on October 1st. So I was incredibly lucky to move my retirement up by several months.
It was a whirlwind because I got out of my house by July 27th. With nowhere to live, everything I owned went into storage. Most of it was packed by a friend because I was working. So most of it wasn’t organized.
My daughter just left after helping me unpack 2 different days & to purge. And she helped me make my home exactly that.
I know this is a long post but I wanted you to know Kathryn that you gave me a lot of the courage to get where I am today.
I have been watching since you were a teacher before KIDS! I know how hard it was for you to share your journey of letting go.
I once took a life coaching journey. I was talking about avoidance and not dealing with things. And my coach stopped me short to say that at the time I needed to do what I did because I couldn’t at that time.
Holding onto things IS mentally challenging. I think at 66 I’m finally starting to feel the difference of this freedom.
The best part is that now that I’ve let go, I get to have my grandkids over because my house is no longer cluttered!
Thank you for your story: I have realized that if my place belonged to any friend of mine, I would cry upon entering, since it's so obvious something is very wrong. That is true now after my beloved dog died suddenly a week before Thanksgiving plus all the anxiety of Covid-19 lockdowns (= no comforting hugs, or being able to visit my friends) and all the political insanity === I have just felt frozen. Like a deer in the headlights of a massive truck.
I am going to try tiny, halting baby steps. Oops, no. There's no try...only do says Yoda.
I will give myself 15-20 minutes on a timer to declutter one finite space. If that goes well, I will do that again tomorrow. Otherwise, I will exhaust myself and berate myself for failing this seemingly simple task.
Thank you again for pointing out the emotional aspect of this decluttering.🤔 😊😔😰😣😩😢😫🤯
Even if you only put one thing away, you have achieved something and maybe you will achieve more the day after? Whatever you manage to do is more than you did and before you know it - you will feel like yourself again. Much love to you all, it is a process!
❤️
Decluttering is emotionally draining, but feels so good when it’s done. Everything I own, owns a part of me.
True, but it's ok to be owned by stuff. Just the right stuff :)
Very powerful 2nd sentence... wow.
Wow that 2nd sentence has me truly ready to go toss a lot of “things” I do not want “owning me”
Facts
Well said
"The best t-shirt rises to the top." Classic!😆
And TRUE, lol.
I love that when she shows her home it's a real home. All the time you'll see these influencer homes with this extraordinary expensive closets and most likely messy corners are skipped.
This is a real home and a real way to organize.
Thank you 🧡
after my grandmother died my mom and aunt spent weeks going through her stuff. she had a modest home that i would not have described as cluttered in a million years. but when you think about the fact that something has to be done with everything, from the dining room table to a box of thumb tacks... it really adds up. after that mom gave her (adult) children stickers and told us to mark the things of hers we wanted after her death. she wrote it all down. she's still young and in great health but she said it helps her make choices about possessions and purchases.
As I was finishing my move to my new apartment I realized that I had literally touched everything single thing that I own. There was something surreal about that.
While a little strange to think so far into the future that is oddly a great way to try and divide things.
@@normagonzalez4987 mostly i think she just doesnt want to leave us in the position she and her sister found themselves in, grieving in a house full of stuff with no guidance on what to do with any of it or who should get what. now if we could just get my dad to sticker his garage...
@@sewmeonekenobi639 moving is a great chance to declutter!
@@Visshaldar ahh that makes sense.
I love my daughters approach when she moved away from home. She took photos. Then got rid of the objects. She said. ‘I have the memory, I don’t need the thing’.
Yes- I had Heard about that
I got out all my clothes (for ecample that are from back in another season of life, so I HONESTLY dont ever wear them anymore ~but they're still (nice) ~~~~~~~ so I laid them all out on my Bed, did a photoshoot, and folder them all to be ♡Donated to like a women's safe haven shelter ~where they will really love these new clothes to them!😊
So taking pictures of the things as like a little maybe silly but who cares) funeral ~to let them be
sent off to another happy place~*
~IT TOTALLY WORKS =]
That's from the Marie Kondo method!
The picture idea is a good one
. . . . until you do need the thing, then you have to go buy it again. I'm a landlord and have gotten to the point I can find just about any part or tool I need in my basement. Of course there's lots of stuff that needs to go too. Been putting free ads on Craigslist and it's amazing how much stuff I would have pitched in the trash makes someone else happy. I've given away storm windows, kitchen countertops, butcher blocks, light fixtures, doors, building materials, doorbells, etc. etc. etc. Even luggage, excessive cookware, outgrown clothes and food. I gave away 7 home grown luffas and the people who took them were thrilled. You just never know.
I did that 13 years ago when my husband died. I may never look at those pics, but I feel better having them in the cloud.
I really feel this. My partner passed away 4 years ago and our just daughter said to me, mum why do you have dads everything like I don't think he wants you to keep his socks. It was an eye opener for me to move on and go through his staff and finding new homes for it and giving the clothes to homeless men mad me feel like it gave it a purpose beyond our cupboard
Namaste.
That is so cool. I can't tell you how much that means to a homeless person. Thank you.
My husband passed 4 yrs ago too. #widowBalls.
Yes your husband had those things to use them and now he doesn't need them. Giving them to people who do need them is a wonderful act! You can keep only the items that were a symbol of a real emotional connection between you and him or between him and your kids.
Im so sorry. I hope you are doing okay.
I agree, but! I have felt a certain loss of identity with my last decluttering. Most of what I kept was utilitarian and the most minimal of momentos. For instance, (btw I'm old enough to be retired), I got rid of my black and white stuffed animal collection last time. Eeeks! Who knew? The attachment I had to them was more than frivolous sentiment, but a whole range of experiences, memories, and even values. I can't get over the feeling of loss. It's been over 2 years. I think I found comfort knowing they were in a box somewhere and I could pull them out at Christmas whenever so inclined. I have lost a whole range of cozy feelings I could instantly acquire by just looking at their furry little faces. Beware. Things CAN be more than things. Sorry. Great video.
To C Boyle - I do agree with you. I think decluttering is healthy but I also believe a person can go too far. I don't think we should get rid of things that truly do bring us a sense of meaning and a visceral connection to our personal history, just knowing we still have them. I would caution that if it really hurts to let something go, don't. William Morris said keep only the things that are either one of two things: practical, or beautiful to you. I personally include "meaningful" in the beautiful category. I still regret getting rid of some meaningful belongings a dozen years ago now and I honestly still could kick myself.
I put things in my car to take to goodwill, but i almost always wait a week or two in case i change my mind about any of them. More thanna few times, i have retrieved them.
Very very true! I sold highly expensive jewelry my ex got me right after we broke for very little money because it reminded me too much of him and my heart still aches to have those two necklaces back. Once necklace was $3000 and the other $1000 and they were the most beautiful gem stone necklaces gifted to me. Idk what I was thinking... but things can be more than things and that’s ok!
I'm so sorry the adjustment has been harder than you'd hoped. Thank you for your honesty! Perhaps they're being loved by someone else now though? :) Watch Toy Story 3!
I've read that it can be useful to take photos of the things you're getting rid of. Photos can bring back such vivid memories, it's like you never got rid of the "thing" at all! Just a thought. Take care.
No need to apologize. My natural instinct is to be a hoarder. I've moved many times and moved things with me. Each time I move I do pare down though. Some things I have got rid of I wish I didn't. Too many times we let others tell us how to think and feel about your belongings. Those people are not you. They can't possibly know how you feel about something. Too often we accept other's shaming and ridiculing and take advice against our will, just to keep peace.
" Hoarding" may be a boundary issue for some. Respect your own personal boundaries. That means being honest with yourself, recognizing your needs, realizing "those people" whoever they are, are not living your life. Free yourself from other's expectations.
When you called your Dad and started to cry...I jumped up and decluttered my whole bedroom .You will never know how much your videos...have changed my life .I don't want to leave my kids with all my issues..Everyday it gets a little better. I'M SO HAPPY NOW❤️❤️❤️❤️thanks again
If I were only keeping the things that make me happy, my dog would be under one arm and my cat under under other. And we'd blow this joint.
Exactly. Save the kids, the dog and the Guinea Pig and life is complete!
Same here. 🐶🐶🐱
HAHA. That's funny.
icymellymel I hear you. But I've got 3 cats and a shih tzu, so I'd have to make a couple trips.
Can totally relate!
I read Swedish Death Cleaning and found it very helpful, but having a naturally organized person validate how emotionally draining the process can be was huge! The phone conversation with your dad, followed by tears, told me that I'm not crazy to be blindsided by strong feelings as I go through things. Thank you for the peek inside your experience.
I was hoping for something more Swedish death metal in nature, but mmmkuy.
@@commandercaptain4664 You could always listen to Swedish Death Metal while you organize.
I helped my mother move from Indiana to Florida. Believe it or not, she wanted to keep a sales printout from over 30 years ago where she sold furniture. Even that was hard for her to let go. Now that she’s moved down here to even smaller quarters, she still weeding out items to giveaway. But it was extremely jarring for her. After seeing what she was hoarding, I have now been going through and giving things away. You have to just think, “I’m going to let someone else enjoy this”. It’s like sharing!
@Ann S - Thank you for that last sentence, I love that idea of letting someone else enjoy this as a way of sharing.
Wow! Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing with us how hard it can be to navigate our stuff, especially after a loved one has died.
When I did my first big de-clutter 2 summers ago my biggest revelation was how emotionally draining de-cluttering is. Sure physically draining, but the emotions and memories that are attached to everything you touch is so overwhelming. I used to be one of those moms who saved things "in case any of the kids want it" and man was I wrong to do that. My children are now old enough that I can ask them if it's something they think they may want or want now and then I'll decide if holding onto it is worth it. I've even started using my grandmothers good China every day, and I've started wearing my good jewelry on a more regular basis - we have these things to use and because we loved them when we bought them so why hide them in cabinets and jewelry boxes? Life is too short - use the good China, wear the good jewelry, and don't worry about saving things for the kids. Thank you for sharing.
I love this attitude, Kimberly! Life is NOW, use the good stuff!!
“It doesn’t make me happy and my mom gave it to me because it didn’t make her happy”
The best argument I’ve heard for just up and throwing shit away.
Donate it to a charity. We have ENOUGH garbage.
😂😂😂😂😂
I hate it when my mom cleans because she can't seem to throw anything away but sending it to my house makes her feel better about not throwing it away.
This is a Marie Kondo thing, actually - don't be offloading all your crap to other people!
@@jomurphy8034 Foisting 🤣
Thank you for being vulnerable and showing that some decluttering is so emotionally taxing. I did a major declutter of my house over a year ago and there were things I cried over too. But I only gave in on 1 item and kept it. I'm glad I did, but I'm also glad I didn't give in on the rest. If you're just starting your purge, #1...don't start with your sentimental items! But also know that it's okay to cry and purge those guilt feelings. Be thankful for the object and for any joy you experienced while using it, and then let it go so it can bless someone else.
You know what the organizers say. “You wear 20% of your wardrobe 80% of the time.”
This is so true! I literally rotate 3 different outfits at best
this is actually a very interesting and accurate comment. This is the Pareto principle. It is a mathematical principle that is found present in every aspect of life that seem to be completely organic and devoid of mathematical laws. This Vsauce video looking at the Zipf principle (which examines this phenomenon within the use of language) explains it very well! ua-cam.com/video/fCn8zs912OE/v-deo.html
If only that 20% could last 80% longer. I hate wearing out my favorite things.
Can confirm. And I don't even have a wardrobe of clothes
I felt that
I had the same reaction when I chose to get rid of my grandmothers tea cups. I kept them from when we moved her into a home because I felt responsible for them. They sat in a box, they brought me no joy and I had no use for them. I also had zero memories attached to these cups, like it’s not like my grandmother and I sat down and drank tea out of them. I cried because I felt like I was letting her down and my mother down but the reality was that no one even remembered I had them.
It’s amazing when we humanize our stuff and attached so much more value to them than they are actually worth.
Good for you, Kathryn!!
I have the exact same issue - a misc collection of sorts, but never used, sitting in a curio to admire - but who does really (admire them)?? Wondering what to do with them now, maybe see if they are worth something? I did get to ask her about them before she passed....found out she never traveled out of the US but just liked the oriental decor so they weren't even souvenirs of special trips or anything. I wonder if I get rid of them will I regret it, like when I'm truly retired and able to host tea parties, will I even use them then??
My Mom really had the idea to pass things down through the family. Old furniture & dishes etc etc. -- My sister was then given the house with the things when my Mom died with the promise that my sister would continue to make sure the items were passed down through the family or to at least a good new home. The objects are not just objects, but like talismans. My Mom would put things over people sometimes. My sister does try to get the provenance of the items & also tries to get people the items to make their own memories. It's kind of fascinating how objects can take on so much power over people. -- I have old wedding gifts never used & stuck in a dusty box in the garage, but haven't let them go. Your post reminds me that maybe time to pass them to Goodwill. Someone will love the cut glass, I'm sure.
I have all my grandmothers china and kept my grandfathers cloths for years for no reason. I feel like I need to drop them off at a thrift store...uuugh, your so right, nobody even remembers I have these things
Oh dear, tea cups. My mom gave me tea cups she got from her mother when I moved out 25 years ago. Grandmother died 10 years ago. I never drank tea with my grandmother, she was a very... unpleasant person. But still I take those f*cking cups with me when I move.
I don't even drink tea!
WHY?
Your grandmother is important; her stuff is not.
„It sparks necessity.“ THANK YOU, Charlie !! Not everything has to spark joy, there are some things we simply need - joy or not 😉
undLiebeZitrone love this part cause relatable
totally agree!!
Yup....like everything in my apartment, except plants, but, then, I'm a plant hoarder.
Stacey Kersting me too 🌱🌱🌱
Yeah, my toilet brusg doesn't spark joy, but I wouldn't throw it out.
OMGOSH! I am exactly like you! I was in horrible pain for 15 years, and stuff piled up that I couldn’t clean. After successful surgery last year, I felt
so much better, and began the decluttering process and remodeling the whole house! It has been exhausting, but it is making me so happy to see the results!
Half my closet is filled with my husband’s clothes. He passed away over a year ago. I feel like I’m almost ready to do something with his stuff.
I thought this was just going to be her cleaning like a lunatic while listening to Swedish death metal
I'm a grandmother & currently doing a death clean while listening to Opeth.... LOUD 😳
Alex Stilwell I wish it was, instead of her yammering on.
@@duplicateify
I should post one of my next big clean... I'm bipolar so never know in advance when I'll get hyper, but it would definitely be entertaining & the music awesome 😀
🤣🤣
I suddenly want this in my life!
I appreciate you calling your father to offer the items back to him. I hold on to everything & it's really difficult to let go. I can attach sentimental value to almost anything. This helped me because, I guess I never thought about calling. Thank you!
Been begging my mother for years to do a cleaning like this...she just says I can deal with it when she dies... seriously it gives me anxiety thinking about the mess she actually wants to leave me with
I feel for you. I'm the named executor/successor-trustee on my mom's estate and after trying for four years to de-clutter her home with no success, I AM THROUGH. I have said that after heirlooms and personal family stuff is removed, I am simply going to put stuff on the curb for people to pick through and then rent a roll-away bin and have everything that's left hauled away. Seriously, thinking about dealing with her estate (and my siblings) makes me feel that it's gonna take years off of my life. I get stressed thinking about it.
I hear you! When I visit I make mental lists, that's going to go, sis can have that etc.
totally agree with this, but I've had to try & think - it's just stuff & I WILL get thru it. Torture tho :/
My maternal grandmother was an awful hoarder, and they had lived in the same house (and raised three children there!) for over 40 years when it fell to my mother alone to deal with. Her and I, and my two cousins were all the offspring left. We went through and picked out the things that mattered to each of us, and then for the rest an auctioneer sold as it was at an estate sale. That might be the way for you to go!
@@alzorama2876 Just go room by room instead of trying to "cross-room". Even if you move some items to another room until you figure out what you're doing with them. As you finish one room, it's done. Eventually they will all be done. Seems like you may not be wanting to make the decision on where things go. But legally you have the power. Do you have siblings? Are they fighting you over things? If it's NOT hard for you, let them come in and take what they want. If they are not interested, then just follow as I stated before. Good Luck! You can do this.
Before I throw out things that I "think" my kids will want after I'm dead, I ask them if they want it now. Either way it's leaving my house. My home motto is "my house is NOT a storage unit."
@Kristen Hughes -- I love your last statement, "My house is NOT a storage unit."
I was just reading a book on clutter called "Making Space, Clutter Free" by Tracy McCubbin and she talks about the "why" of what you keep. One of her 'whys' is other people's stuff. When I read that, I looked around my very chaotic living room and said to myself, "That belongs to___ and that belongs to___ and that belongs to___" In that moment I discovered that the bulk of the clutter was something I was saving/keepng for someone else. So I'm stopping that and getting the stuff to the people who I was keeping it for. It's amazing how much less clutter there is in the house!
The best t-shirts rise to the top you know! That was hilarious I love this video thanks Kathryn !
Me too!!
@@Ciruela1 It made perfect sense! I'm sure I have said that to myself before.
I recognize that drawer. 😖
That was the BEST tip here! Zactly how I sort my shirt stacks!
Yess
I started crying after you called your dad...it was like you were giving joint permission to each other to get rid of the objects and jointly hold on to the memory instead. So beautiful. And thank you for talking about how grief has it's own timeline- and it cant be rushed. Thank you for this video, your insights, and th e humor and love between you and your husband!
Cried over a preplanned junk call
Get real
I neeeeded to watch this! Thank you! Over the last 10 years I have gone from “collecting” to teetering on “hoarding”!😱 I’m an antique dealer and home stager so it’s easy to justify holding onto things that could be considered inventory. I’m ready to get rid of things that don’t serve a purpose!
"Sorry mom, I love you". "That's all right son, I'm making another one just like it for you on Christmas", lol.
If you can let go of things, but feel a bit emotional about it, take a picture of it and keep the picture. Sometimes, just having a picture of the thing is enough to jog your memory of the good feeling attached to it.
That is a wonderful idea. ❤❤❤
I do exactly that! It makes me feel so relieved to throw out those things, but to still have a memory of them.
She threw away a picture with a memory and keep plastic topiaries. She will take pictures of topiaries next. Ha!
That's a really good idea!
With the recent passing of my beloved husband, I took pictures of all the personal things, that belong to my husband, and passed them on to our two sons. I'm so glad I did that! 🥀🥀🥀🥀
This is the “realest” decluttering video I’ve ever seen. Calling your dad to ask to get rid of something he gave you? That was powerful. Thank you for making this video.
Michelle Allen But what do you do with things your deceased parents gave to you? That’s where I get stuck.
Michelle Allen But what do you do with things your deceased parents gave to you? That’s where I get stuck.
Daily Dubstep If you don’t love them or need them, they go. Things aren’t the person.
@@sconan01 You can sell them (Facebook has community garage sales), donate them to charities such as Goodwill, Salvation Army, etc. Did you know that Goodwill recycles torn or stained apparel, linens, single shoes, gloves, and socks, in any condition?
@@sconan01 your parents live on in your memories and heart. They are so much more than one thing. No single thing identifies your parent to you.
Swedish Death cleaning: Imagine YOU have croaked. Your family is walking through your home. What would you not want them to see or find? What would you not want them to have to deal with?
So...
*Do not leave your clutter for your family to wade through.
*Don't keep things that would embarrass you or someone still living.
*Throw out what you are not using right now, nor will have use for in the next year.
*You get ONE box that is your PERSONAL stuff. Things only important to you. Things nobody else wants. This is a box your family doesn't need to go through. They can just pick it up and throw it out. I put things incredibly precious to me that my Mom gave me in there. It means something to me. It fills, overwhelms my heart with memories and love. Paw prints of pets who have passed away. I throw out or donate things that were hers or my dad's that are just things or possessions. I hope this helps you. It is really hard to only have one box. I kept NO more than two "?" boxes. I put a date on the box. Go through those boxes again in six months when you are in the mind frame to do it. Pretend like you are going through someone else's stuff. You will be surprised how objective you can be. These are things that helped me. It is a process. I kept my Moms things for 15 years until I was finally ready to go through them. I cried my eyes out, laughed and looked like a crazy person. I found some things incredibly easy and some of the things yikes! It took me two sessions just to sit down and do it. I felt much better when it was done. Pictures of people I don't know I threw out. If I knew someone and they had living relatives, I contacted them to see if they wanted them. If I could not find contact info, I threw them out.
Good luck to you.
I appreciate the fact that it was mentioned, as weird as it may sound to some, that people can get emotionally attached to items. Case in point for me; my husband of 34 years was murdered. Initially, I held on to everything. Notes I found with his writing, old cologne bottles, clothing, etc. etc. It's been a few years now and I have been able to offer items to family members and have slowly gained the strength to part with items that would mean nothing to anyone else. I need the strength to continue and your video inspired me to keep moving forward. Thank you for the positive look at how decluttering can help people heal.
More than anything, your warm kindhearted approach was so uplifting, ....Excellent !
Accidentally stumbling across a UA-cam video titled Swedish Death Cleaning is what started me on my decluttering journey. It was just after my 67th birthday, and I remember thinking “If I don’t do it, my daughter will have to, and that’s not right.”. I hope your video will inspire others.
wow .. Seeing the video today was perfect timing .. I lost my brother 25 years ago today ... I needed to hear that it's okay to let it go .. Carrying around his stuff for all this time has weighed me down ... At 60, I'm finally ready to let him go ... Thank you.
I kinda rolled my eyes at this as i clicked on it anyway lol.... and it was actually very helpful as i find myself sifting thru my mothers things 💜🧡💚
My closets (2) were small and very dark, I was losing my mind with three dressers in the room. Focus! I bought (2) wardrobes and created a wall of closets and love it. One closet removed and three dressers gone. A wardrobe wall that focus where all the clothes all go. S/O was not happy at first but he now gets it. Benefits incalculable! Now it is organized and manageable! Thank u for allowing me to share!
I’m not a materialistic person, but after a huge loss and grief period in my life I definitely have a harder time letting “things” go. Thanks for sharing.
b-fergsmom sending you love & healing xxx
@@BFergs187 Your comment resonated with me as I lost my best friend, Charlie, when we were both 23 (24 years ago.) I still keep in regular touch with his mom, as I know her loss cut deeper than I could ever imagine. And I still talk about him to old & new friends, as I promised her back then that I'd keep his memory alive. She's always said you never get 'over' it, but some things helped her get 'through' the worst so she could live the life he would have wanted her to. I'll continue to send you my thoughts. Take care. x
@@BFergs187 I'm so sorry for your loss... ❤🙏
@@BFergs187 Oh of course I don't mind! Find me on Instagram! Be my friend! ❤😁 instagram.com/JanisFoleyPhotography 📷
I recently went through this with an old pan. It was big, bulky, worn, and from 1973. But it was my mom's. I couldn't get rid of it for some reason even though I never used it, and honestly neither did she! She hated cooking. I told my husband to take it to the recycling bin for me and cried. Over a pan! But my mom wouldn't want me to cry and to mourn a pan she didn't even like to use. Thank you for this video
I love your comment. You really revealed the agony of decluttering.
I know this video is years old and you probably won't read this BUT you openly talking about dealing with things from loved ones lost is exactly what I needed to hear. We have lost five close family members in the last 24 months - my mother (adopted), my bio mom, then my bio dad, then my dad (adopted), then my husband's closest brother. We have all of their belongings on our property right now. I feel surrounded by death and stuff. And I think I feel like I am surrounded by death simply because I am surround by their things. It is time to let go of the vast majority with this mindset in play. Thank you for sharing more than just cleaning tips. ❤
It's so wonderful and inspiring to see a professional deal with her own emotional clutter. It makes the process seem possible.
I love how honest she is being here, even confessing how her stuff is in his closet that she have forgotten about 🤣🤣🤣
Thank you for sharing this! After my husband's grandmother died, we bought the house and moved in as it was where he grew up and it was the main hub of all family holidays, alot of memories. We wanted to raise our family there too. After her children came in and dealt with the items that they wanted to keep we were left with the responsibility/burden of having to deal with and dispose of evrything that was left over. Which was the vast majority of it. An whole house and basement full of an entire lifetime of someone elses stuff, it took 2 large dumpsters the size of our drive way just to get rid of all the stuff that wasn't fit for donating. What we ended up with after that is still far too much. More of what we have sitting around is someone else's stuff, leaving not kuch room for our own things. We've been putting it off for a few years now but everytime I go near it I can feel the stress, anxienty and feeling of burden weighing on me and I just want to throw it all out. The emotional connection to some of it and the makes it difficult for both of us but it also feels overwhelming. Little by little I keep tackling it and getting rid of things, and finding a place for the items that will definitely stay. It's definitely a process but so worth it to do. Thank yiu for this! I will share this with my husband in the hopes that it helps him to let go of these things and hopefully we will both be better off without so much stuff just sitting around driving us crazy.
Little by little. Keep at it. Good luck you two.
Mlm
Gotta say the "It doesnt really make anybody happy" saying is *so* much more palatable than "Does it spark Joy?" caca-doodie. I have never looked a a clean pair of sox and felt joy. However I have been happy I had em when I needed them.
I cant think of much in the way of STUFF that 'sparks joy,' but I am grateful to have the stuff that allows me to function.
"Happy" is much more down-to-earth than "Joy." Joy is reserved for seeing your newborn Baby for the first time. Happy is every-day stuff like not being out of ice, or coffee.
Great video!
I read somewhere “these things are not your mother”, we don’t have to keep all their stuff to feel we love them after they pass, it’s ok to keep a few special things and yes it’s hard to bin things. So for that as well as general declutter, I much prefer to donate, preferably I give to ppl I know first, then I also put stuff outside my house it invariably finds a new owner who wants its, I also use freecycle, eBay or charity shops, only in the end it’s the bin. Sounds like a process but it’s easy for me.
I always thought I was a hoarder because my flat seems permanently packed and then I saw the size of their walk-in wardrobe and realised I just need more space. Yes I do.
I used to get in constant trouble for having amessy room.. Meanwhile my mom had wall lenght built in wardrobe and six drawer dresser whilst my sister had a very large deep modern wardrobe.. I was given a huge dark antique wardrobe with two short rods facing forward to hang clothes on.. In other words no space at all.. I finally scrounged enough money to get a set of drawers.. It was horrible... Classic gaslighting every other night all through puberty 15 to 18..i had grey hair by the time 21..
,😂
Lololol!
@@kkibela I'm so sorry you were treated that way.
My marriage of 33 years has come to an end and it is amazing how I have picked up the pieces of my broken life and have decluttered everything in my home and I feel so much stronger and more alive than I ever have. Thank you for sharing your videos they have helped me so much. ❤️❤️
Please come help me do it!
It’s not as hard as it seems...
I've just had the same experience. 35 years for me. I'm not quite f innished but it is so refreshing. I'm also feeling stronger, more confident and happier than I've been for years.
Ladies it does feel good at first, but when the house got empty I started filling it up again. So don't skip decluttering yourself of feelings you haven't felt in years, one at a time. And thank you for sharing.
isabel rivas don’t view your whole life broken, just because one piece of it broke.Japanese people put back their broken bowls and plates by fusing the pieces with gold and cherish them more. So gather your broken pieces and put yourself together again. Life is not over yet
Me: declutters my space so i can use and find the things i like and need.
My husband: oh yay an open space i can throw all my old mail, receipts, and dirty laundry!
😑
Totally understood. I will go to my mom's house and deep clean an area. Invariably, my sister, who lives with her, fills it up with her junk and mess! [insert screaming]
EXACTLY! And it starts immediately. It's as if he can smell the open space. I turn my back and the spot is full of his stuff. Burns me up.
Oh, that's easy. Tell him a black hole opened there, and that's why it's not crammed full of stuff. And then disappear the stuff he put in there. (Especially the dirty laundry, lol). After once or twice, he'll get the message. Or he won't, because he never goes back to look for the stuff. Either way, it's win-win.
Mine will go out and buy a new, single purpose gadget to put there.
That's my wife when I clean out a spot
This video made me cry! 😢 I have a hard time letting go of things especially after loosing both of my parents just three months ago! 😢
When you called your Dad and I saw you cry 😢 oh that hit me and I cried with you. I felt that with you!
I am so very sorry for your loss!🙏
The lake house painting... That's one thing to KEEP definitely...
Completely agree! I thought the same thing!!
I think people that are going on these decluttering frenzies are really going to regret getting rid of some things once the smoke clears! 💨
@@AccessoriesAddict5528 I 100% agree👍
Total agree with keeping the lake house painting! She could hang it in the closet!😊
Yes I loved it! It was a watercolor painting!
It isn't that I don't want to declutter, it takes energy to do it.
So true.
Word.
Yes, that energy thing is draining into keepin the clutter. I used to be a messy person. Now ocd. My space represents my mindset. I rather have it clean n organized.
Well what I've found is that if you tuck all new clutter under old clutter, it will buy you at least 3 more months of laziness. Works. like. a. charm. I already tucked earlier today so I'm on my way to fresh new bedsores!
A live well lived I tell ya. A life well lived 🛌👍
One closet, one dresser, one room at a time. Pretend you are moving to a new home ...and the moving company is charging $10 per pound.
Thanks Kathryn. Realize I have kept stuff from when my Dad passed. Now caring for my Mom and have been trying to have her declutter. It is so emotional.❤❤❤
I did a "death" de-cluttering/KonMarie and a year later was buying a few of the same things I tossed. Not sure if the absolutism of some of these practices is practical.
This is what I worry about. Sure I can pair down my spatulas or socks but I bet in a year I’ll have more. I like the concept but I’m worried I’ll waste money replacing things.
Sometimes I find it helpful to have a 'jail' or like a "quarantine" type place for my donations if I'm not quite sure, and keep it in an out of the way space for a little while. If I reach for anything in there then obviously I still need it and shouldn't donate it! Doesn't work for everything you plan to donate but can be helpful in working out which things you can comfortably live without and which things you'd need to buy if you donated. And having lots of things isn't a bad thing! But lots of things that are stopping you from living your best life is 😊
“The best shirts rise to the top..”
has to be the best line I’ve heard🤣
I buy cheap tees as long as it's my size and cheap. Or no alcohol branding
And oh so true.
@@jerrybrown3331 I don't buy anything I don't REALLY REALLY like. It's harder for women because nothing fits off the rack.
T shirts are too easy and often look sloppy. Jmo
Your husband nailed it. Very little in my life sparks joy. It is useful or it is necessary.
So is your husband a joy? Or a necessity?
@@marlahill1291 Husband?
Maybe you're not shopping at the right places? Because a LOT of stuff I get a whole log of happiness from wearing or using.
I love American “closets” which are actually like small rooms.
Only the walk-in closets are like that and walk-in closets are a luxury to have most American apartments have small closets
That is a rich person's closet. Most of us never have that much space or that much stuff. America has poor people and very many homeless people just as other countries do, but you wouldn't know it if you only watched American tv and movies or you-tube videos made by people who have both the time and the money to make them.
The wealthy disparity is pretty huge 😅
Most Americans do not have these... These are luxury. Always remember, what the TV or internet displays about a people doesn't really represent as a whole and sometimes not even a decent percentage..
It depends on what type of house you live in. Older homes have much smaller closets, so most people supplement with exterior armoires, etc. Newer built homes tend to have these walk in closets.
I don't comment often, But your emotional vulnerability and authenticity about the emotional aspects of holding onto "stuff" really struck a chord. Thanks for this video
Yes, I went through my house three years ago after my husband died and it was very emotional. Could not stop crying. Made it through and now it is time again, oh dear
Sherrie Fehring sherrie, I lost my husband 1.5 years ago and have gone through this process in the first several months, now I’m going to do an even deeper one soon. Hug. It’s very emotional for we widows ... and helps in some important ways.
Wishing you peace in this process, hon.
I am sorry to you both. I can’t imagine going thru this. There is no time line for this so take all the time you need. Peace as you navigate life without him.
Peace to you.
I have been trying to pick a spot a day to declutter. You know “that chair” in the bedroom with clothes tossed there carelessly that soon becomes a hulking mass of material, sleeves and legs poking out here and there? I found my chair today! And amazingly, my closet was much less empty after.
I need to do that next week. Wish me luck;)
@@pinkrose5796 Pink Rose!!! WHERE ARE YOU? DID YOU MAKE IT THROUGH? Should we send help? Ha!
God bless you!
I'm about to start decluttering RIGHT NOW!
Peace, Lynne 🍃💜🍃
The more I declutter, the worse it gets. So much perfectly good stuff, some brand new, too good to toss I want to either sell or give away. It takes time to do this. It's stacked all over the place. This is what happens when you have a very demanding career in a far away city and spend 30 years of your life commuting back and forth to work.
@@marglam6123 Mine's my kitchen table.
@@lynnecarnivale5085 hello good morning how are you doing
Thank you so much, I needed this right now! I am going through an entire collection of crafted things I made as a child that reappeared while emptying the house I grew up in...and it's so emotional. But I don't have space for it and who's ever going to look at it again??...
Last year I decluttered most of my apartment, sold and donated everything. What helps the most is that people are owning a home for the first time and don't want to buy expensive stuff and they go to FB Marketplace to buy the items. And yes, it is emotional to rid of albums, what I did was scanned all the pictures and saved them into a USB disk and made a backup disk in case. And bought a digital frame online, and gifted it to my sister for her wedding. She loved it! Now she owns a house for the first time, has a baby with Charles and they too used FB Marketplace to find items, except for their bed - they bought the king size bed at the furniture shop store. Thanks so much for the inspiring video! ❤🌲🌲☃️
A real key to being organized and having a peaceful space is to be sure you actually have a designated place for everything you own. It's really handy and smart to keep a few extra bins, clear plastic lidded shoe boxes, small plastic baskets, etc in storage so you can grab a container when needed to keep everything as organized as it was the day you completed your 'big clean'.
My fist time I realised I cannot hold time and have to let go was when I had to donate my daughter's little dresses because she was not a little girl any more. I had a good cry surprisingly. That was years ago...and tomorrow I have to give her away, she is getting married. We don't need a stuff for memories...but I did save one of her dresses hopping one day to give it to her daughter. 😉
That's true. But still hard to move on, I have a 8 months baby girl and I can't donate her clothes yet, I cry just folding it. I can't imagine with other things. Congrats for her wedding, it's so sweet to keep one. Eventually I'll have to face my emotions 💓
You made me cry. I hope her day was beautiful
@@aprilrain2011 thank you my dear, it was a beautiful wedding. I was emotional wreck but I held tears because It was time to celebrate. She married her best frend and first and only love at the same time and hope to be there for her when time comes to let go of her girl's clothes. 😘😘😘😘
@@jrdz2691 I have a two year old and what I've been doing is saving one or two items in great condition that I would love to see her pass down, or that bring many happy memories to me.
Im saving a small capsule of items. Some of us do like to have things to remember a certain time. I also hope to pass them on to her one day if she has children. You can do this without clutter or hoarding, just keep editing it down to the most important few items.
I'm glad I found this video. It struck home with me. My mom passed away last year. I was decluttering my own home the year before, but wasn't finished. Then, when she got sick, I spent all of my time with her in her last 5 months, at least 12 hours per day. Then we had to go thru her home. We didn't realize how much she kept. Everything. It has taken us 9 months so far and we're not completely done. We've decluttered all but a small space. Your comment about your brother as well as letting go of things that have been there past their time is very meaningful to me. I know I'll get back to my own decluttering soon and I feel that I'll be able to let go of more. I've gone thru most of my stuff once, but now I realize I've kept more than I should have. Thank you
I’m a new subscriber on UA-cam, and have been watching your videos for several weeks now. I truly appreciate all of your videos, I have never been disappointed by any of them. Currently my home is turned upside down. I stared the declutter project and... let’s just say that no one she do this alone. Especially if you have a lot of memorabilia. Talk about a challenge! Last night … I threw in the towel. I was over It...ALL of it. But then, as I look through your library of videos I found this one. Now, this video has inspired me to keep going! I dont feel so overwhelmed about being overwhelmed. It’s ok to cry, it has help me with the letting go process. Thanks for sharing. I am up and at it again. 👍🏼
My mom just passed from covid, I needed to see this, I was bawling the whole time, I already have a room full of her things and I'm not done sorting her house out yet.
So sorry for your loss. It will be very difficult to just "throw out" all your mom's things. Take your time.
@ Kissy My family and I are going through the same thing with Mom passing at 92 years old. Her heart just quit. Give yourself the time you need to grieve, remember and sort. You don't have to get rid of everything right away. We are finding that some of it, like photos, can be kept for a little while to sort through after the house is completely cleared of everything else. We've been working on it for over 2 months now and still have more to do, but it WILL get done. Blessings AW
@Kissy I'm so sorry.
Sorry for your loss. Take your time. My mom has been gone 6 years and I still have bins of stuff that I can't go through.
I look at de-cluttering as " letting go of the ropes that bind us to the past". Keep treasures you LOVE and display them or let them go, so you're FREE to move forward in your life in a healthy way.
My sister was a hoarder and even kept ALL wristbands she got from all her hospital stays and cancer treatments. She accumulated hundreds before she past away. When we were cleaning out her organized, cluttered home, we discovered that, aside from garbage, she saved EVERYTHING. It was depressing and emotional for our family to go threw it and donate most of it. It was like we were giving pieces of our beloved sister away. PLEASE DON'T DO THIS TO YOUR LOVED ONES.
So much of what we have has no sentimental value at all. I get stuff just in case I might need it and then find it 10 years later wondering why I got it in the first place.
@Doris I totally get that about your sister... Shortly after my mom passed away, I had a yard sale... Afterward I felt as if I had thrown part of my mom away. It was very traumatic. So much so that I haven't been able to get rid of anymore of her stuff since (she died in 2007!!) I think about that happening to my kids when I pass and I don't want to burden them in that way... But at the same time I'm stuck with being unable to part with all this "stuff" and I feel trapped in a paradox.
@@Jypsie415 :You are doing the best that you can.
@@juliecipolla6732 Thanks for the encouragement! 💞
@@Jypsie415 Good luck
I love when you bring your family to "work".
Thank you for being so open & honest about what it's really going to be like to go through & get organized! 👏
one reason i have been purging is for whoever has to clean out my space when i die, now that has a name
Girl this is like a therapy session! We do hold on to things because of the emotional aspect of it and I know I do. Thanks for this
Thank you for being so real and helping me with what I know I have to do to move forward. 💜🙏🏾💜🙏🏾
WOW! Thansk so much! I appreciate your empathy.
Decluttering while in the process of moving... This is an EMOTIONAL process
Scientifically Smith how did it go?
That sounds super stressful, hope it went ok.
It's such a hard process. After I moved out of the place I rented for three years I had accumulated a lot of junk. It was exhausting.
It always is :/ that’s the beat time to do it though since moving kinda forces you to. That’s what I end up doing. But moving itself is emotional so there’s usually a lot of tears...
I hope it went well!
I 'm an active 67 year old. I've been married for 34 years but we have no children. I still save stuff as though we do! Cards, clippings, and other memorandum.
When my mother died in 2009, I felt compelled to save many things she gave me. Plus, she passed on little things she saved from HER mother. By little things, I mean trinkets with no value except for memories.
I'm getting to the stage where I now realize I have no one who really cares about what I'm saving. I have two younger brothers (they were both born in my late teens) who really don't care about my tiny hoard.
Thanks for your wisdom! I asked my husband why I'm keeping cards from our wedding in 1985 and he laughed. I get it!
I started to recycle cards as soon as I receive them to prevent them from being kept and having to deal with them later. It has helped a ton. The only ones that I SOMETIMES hold on to are those photo cards from family members...but I am very selective.
Not exactly at the 'end of the line'! I plan on a few more years! But I know what you mean.
faeriesmak I cut some cards into strips to use as bookmarks. I enjoy them until they’re worn.
Kind of strange to find that sad. To not have children to pass things on to???? I have no children, but very fortunate to have a godchild and godgrandchildren, but I am just very grateful that I can spend time with them and share ideas and learn from each other. Now that is important to me and the things I have is not their taste or style so it wouldn't really make them happy.
Cheryl MacGregor Hugsss We are childless too. I get it. Not an easy path to walk, is it?
There’s a few FB groups out there for us childless folks if you ever want to connect with us. We are a little tribe of our own and support one another. (If you haven’t joined already)
You’re so kind to be so vulnerable for those of us who need you to be even though that means you’re opening yourself up to being hurt by people who won’t appreciate you. Thank you for showing your pain and by way allowing me to feel mine in this area. ❤️
I got tears and wanted to give you a hug when you started crying. The raw honesty in this video touched my heart and gave me the "oomph" I needed to go through some of my stuff and get rid of it as I have, unintentionally "hoarded" stuff with emotional attachment through the years. I guess I'm afraid if I get rid of something, I may forget the memory. Taking a picture and letting go is a great idea. Very helpful video, great big hugs and a big thank you!
This made me tear up and wish I had your energy. Depression and anxiety make it hard to face stuff like this.
April Davis Start small! Even if it’s just a drawer. It’s hard at first but it does get easier and easier (and more fun) and having less REALLY helps with anxiety, I can attest to that. All the best.
Think of it as a treasure hunt. Cry if you need to. Like April said start small and celebrate your successes.
I've also had a depressive phase the last few days. I think it stems from wanting to organize but have the extreme fatigue and lack of interest/motivation is tough. It's just a cycle of wanting to do something then being even more sad bc you're too sad to do it. I hear ya
I encourage you to find a system. I had terrible anxiety to the point it blew my blood pressure after roof. The doctor wanted me to go on Zoloft and Klonopin. I discovered minimalism and the science behind stuff and anxiety so I decided to minimize all of my stuff. I no longer suffer from anxiety it is absolutely changed my life. Don't look at everything in your home as a whole. Start with one corner one drawer and work at it once a day once a week whenever works with you. There is another way and that is 30 day minimalism challenge on the first day you put one thing in the box the second day two things the third day three things so forth and so on. I started with my closet I I now have a 10 by 10 wardrobe to wake up and go to a closet full of stuff and not knowing what to wear is a horrible start. Simply Google capsule wardrobe 10 by 10 wardrobe minalism the science behind too much stuff and anxiety!
Decluttering truly sparks joy and reduces anxiety to non-existent levels. Do try it! Binge watch Marie Kondo/ Konmari videos and go for it!
I have been cleaning and organizing my office this morning. I lost my Husband almost 3 years ago and have found some things I can not face. I sat down to have lunch and this video popped up. Thank you, could not be better timing. I am jumping back in to get it done. ❤
I'm sorry for your loss. When I lost my dad we had nothing of his except a suitcase of his clothes, his shoes, his glasses and some randomly scribbled notes while in the hospital I couldn't touch anything for at least a year. Grief is hard, it's ok that its not easy. Please don't go through this alone unless you need to.
For anything you still may not be ready to sort through, set a timer on your phone to remind yourself to check in with it in a few months.
@Virginia Andre There is no need for you to part with those items of your dads. Everyone grieves differently and we each face our own grieving in our own time. Sometimes keeping few selected items of our loved ones can be comforting to us but that is just my opinion.
Maybe set them aside if you are filled with emotion, to give yourself time to process what they mean to you. Then return in a week or few days or months so you don't regret letting go of something that keeps him close. God bless.
@@JennsCorner777 I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost both my mum and dad within a few years of each other and, other than certain things I knew they wanted to give particular people, for several years I just couldn't face going through everything so I packed it all away and, when I could finally face it, did (and am still doing it) bit by bit as I can handle it.
I wish you all the best and don't feel you need to force yourself or let others force you to keep going if it becomes too much. I've found from experience that doing that can actually bring it all to a grinding halt for longer than if you do what you can, when you can.
Thank you for this insightful video. Nothing makes me happier than a clean, well-organized home to live in!
We chose to declutter by opening a vintage Etsy shop and selling a lot of our collections. It's great to know that our stuff is being enjoyed all over again all over the country and the world.
@Wendish -- Great idea!
You're almost to a million subscribers!! So excited and happy for you!! ♥
I noticed that tonight too!
me too!!!!
Some of the most beautiful advice ever was given was from an investment expert:
Be attached to people -- NOT things!
I like things better, myself, lol.
@@windsofmarchjourneyperrytr2823 Me too! And some people are just UGH....seems I am happier de-cluttering my life of PEOPLE that don't bring me joy!! (And social events) Ha HA. But I'll keep my toys!
YES. And memories. They only take up storage space in your head and you can find them anytime you want them.
And never love anything that can’t love you back!
Ehhh, people have hurt me deeper than things...
Best advice I've ever heard on decluttering and keeping items from the past.
Truthfully, I think this channel is so inspirational. I was on my way to work and just driving and decided to put this on just to break my usual thinking and worrying about life, and yeah, totally did the trick. So refreshing just even to listen to on the road.
Omg, my brother passed away when i was pregnant with my first son, 8 years later with 3 sons now and we've gotten rid of almost nothing, i was full of fear of facing these decisions, this video was so helpful ❤
I read pregnant with his first son :) anyways, if you have the space why declutter his things? Or maybe other family members will want some of it?
I too hang on to things due to emotions. I have a really hard time getting rid of anything that was given to me especially by someone who has passed. I really needed this today. Thank you so much for sharing.
I completely understand. I think the key for me is donating it to a charity shop and imagining it making someone else happy. My mother was teeny-tiny and I imagine some extra-small lady seeking bargain clothes at a charity shop and hitting the mother lode (!!!) when she came across the hundreds of items we donated from my mother's overflowing closets.
Thank you for posting!❤❤❤❤
Yesterday I finally put things away into a storage box, that I had avoided doing since 2018!
I used to move house every 2 years, so it was great to weed stuff out.
I now live with roommate, who has packrat-itis. I've not had a damn good purge in a decade. I'm trying to train her family to Christmas gift me either depletion gifts like skincare items or anything smaller than a pack of gum or cellphone size.
It's frustrating, because I somehow managed to live minimally until I moved in where I'm at.
It wasn't helpful after my mom passed and left me all her photos of me. I have no desire to have 5 copies of the same school photos, nor now a decade's worth of "important" papers.
It's amazing what peer pressure can do.
Love this. It was so inspiring. "Everything has it's own timeline ". The best line in the video. I'm ready to do this! Thank you.