How We Avoid The Darker Side of Running
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- Опубліковано 30 чер 2024
- It would be foolish to believe that there isn't a darker side to running. Things that happen or that you do that leave to negativity not positivity. But we're all about starting conversations so these are the ways that we avoid the darker sides of running and try to spread the positivity!
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“A candle never loses its flame by lighting another candle” brilliant
I ONLY ran indoors for YEARS for fear of judgement. Since running outdoors, I've really embraced the fact that i am a runner, and if someone wants to judge me, so be it. I'm getting out there and giving it my all. I've improved leaps and bounds since leaving my fear at the door.
Great attitude!
brilliant, thank you
Have to admit, I have NEVER judged other runners, no matter what they look like, how they run or how fast they are.
But I've allways felt that others judged me.
I'd love to watch a Messy Happy/Mark Lewis duo video where you do something together 😊
This right here is why I love the running community. I’m plus size and took up running as part of my weight loss goals, and I felt that same nervousness described in the video, but I find that other runners are just so supportive and it’s the only sport I’ve ever tried in which I don’t feel judged or outcast by those who are faster or more fit than me. 😊
Adding to the judgment aspect, but on the other side of the coin, is allowing insecurity to creep into your head worrying about what others are thinking about you when you're on your running journey. Earlier this year, I was training for my first marathon and would head to the local track. Other runners would fly down the stairs all fresh-faced and sweat free just starting their run. They'd zip around, passing me so often to the point that it came into play and started to take away the focus (and joy) of the experience (even though I was tackling 15-20 mile sessions and was a good 10-12 miles or more in when they appeared). One morning, as it was raining, I kept saying "Keep showing up..." out loud again and again. Something clicked in my mind and from there, it sunk in that this is for ME and these people were showing up too...but weren't necessarily out there for the same reason. We're all on a different path. So, do your thing and keep showing up!
Long time watcher of your channel here. I'm a fan of Mark Lewis too but as I see it it's a different type of content. I find yours very motivational, during my running journey I have been through a few things that were all very well covered by your videos, they *really* helped me to become a better runner (and overall a better person). I think it's my first comment on YT but I had to write this. Please keep the great work :)
I had exactly the same thought. This Messy Happy is (for me) more of a journey channel and I love it for that reason
Yes running is such an inclusive sport, I've chatted with hundreds of people on the start lines of races and whilst out running, and nobody ever seems to judge anyone else - we are all here for the same thing
Comparison is the thief of joy
Knowing how hard running sometimes can be, I always celebrate, when seeing another runner on my run, with a high-five and people literally light up by this small gesture.
Sharing good vibrations is important ☀️🥳😍
My 3 year old went across a balance beam at the city park without falling. He asked me: "Are you proud of me?" It almost threw me on my keester that he could understand the abstract concept of pride. "Yes, son, I am proud of you." We all want to feel good in the eyes of others. The story that Ben told about the opposite-direction runner that he and Mary encouraged exemplifies this notion. It feels wonderful to make others feel wonderful. 🏃♀
I don't usually comment on videos. But I want you to know what this channel has meant to me.
Because of you and this channel, I ran for the first time in my life with a sense of purpose in 2022. I was 35yo a month away from 36yo and it was during the cold winter. I ran my first 5k following your 10-week schedule. Every Saturday that I would run, I would tell myself, "That's the furthest you've ever run!" I couldn't believe I was doing it, even sticking it out in snow and over the holidays. My husband ran track in school, ran in college, and is still a runner. In our 16+ years together, he could NEVER get me to join him. This channel not only has gotten me to run multiple 5ks, but now I'm going for 10k. I am a runner. Never in my life would I expect myself to utter that sentence. I don't know the other guy, but this channel changed it all for me. My husband and I now enjoy runs together. 😊 You and Mary are amazing!
Oh wow!! This is incredible to read and thank you so much. If we played even a tiny part in your journey to being a runner then we feel super privileged 😊 here’s to the rest of your amazing life in running. Thanks so much for the kind words 😊
Mist runners are nice and encouraging people.
When I first got running, I was carting around 120kg of primo fun living fat.
My early attempts at long runs were walk / run home after work- with a section across Sydney harbour bridge.
It’s when I noticed that there is a running community. Nearly every runner whose path I crossed nodded/ said hello in one form or another…
That didn’t happen when walking in civvies!!!
Was super encouraging!
LOL I found you because of Mark Lewis and found Parkrun because of Mark, as well. At this week's Parkrun I managed to hit a goal I never thought I'd hit, knocking more than 10 minutes off my original Parkrun time in April of last year, with a PB of 23:21, yesterday. It's thanks in no small part to Parkrun and all of you fantastic UA-camrs who helped me to get here and I have no intentions of slowing down, aiming for my first marathon in October. So, thank you to the entire running community for lighting my candle, as well!
Judging is indeed a trap for all of us runners, the story about the guy you told was beautiful, inspiring stuff!
Ben, one of your main pieces of advice really helped me out today during a scorching hot half-marathon. I was discussing with my wife on the way to the race about the heat and being anxious for a result...
Me: I've heard from youtube (you) that to take the pressure off I should have an A goal, a B goal and a C goal. Least then you can walk away with something.
Me: A goal, break sub 1:30. B goal, sub 1:35. C goal just PB.
Me: Actually with the GI issues from gels and my anxiety. A goal is don't 💩 myself on the way round, then B, C and D.
So yeah, I ran the race. Had a horrendous time. But still got my D goal.
I met my wife at the finish.
Me: that went terrible. Absolutely the worst experience I've ever had on a run.
Me: but at least I still PB'd. So I got my D goal at least :)
Wife : hey you didn't 💩 yourself!
Me: ...
Still me: ...
Still me: ...YOU ARE FLUFFING RIGHT!!! 'A' Goal Achieved 🥇
Me: Fluffing great :)
#CelebrateEveryWin 🙂
*I didn't say fluffing
There’s a bit of a “conflict”between running despite low motivation and not punishing yourself by running through an injury.
If one part of the brain is looking for excuses not to run, any slight niggle can be used as just such an excuse.
So we train another part of our brain to over-ride those thoughts. But when we do have a genuine injury, that part of our brain still kicks in and tells us to just get out there.
I love your content, I’m 55 years old and running for 1 1/2 years , and you can’t imagine how much you have helped me .
This feels like it's more geared toward "How we avoid the darker side of life". Great advice that can be adapted for anyone, even non-athletes.
I found your channel after Mark Lewis and I have to say if I could watch only one it would be yours. It mightn’t be as funny but it’s way more informative, inspirational and with much higher production values. You’ve pretty much covered everything I could ask as a runner. Apart from one thing. I’d love you guys to do a story about running as a couple and how you address the issues that can arise when trying to balance a relationship, your training goals, the goals of your partner, and all the “messy happy” stuff that happens in between. I love running with my partner and love seeing her progression but sometimes it can be a mental struggle for her when she sees we are at very different levels in our running journey. Any tips greatly appreciated. Keep up the great work!
I only started running at the age of 49 when covid hit and quarantine started we were only allowed out for 1 hour a day. The reason I started so late was the fear of being judged. It didn't take long before I really couldn't care less what others thought, I was doing it for me not them. Fortunately iv never judged only looked on with admiration for anyone getting out there.
I used to be self conscious and wondered what people were thinking while I was out trying to run. I was also too shy to wear a flashy pair of trainers that I ordered but all of that passed and now I just don't care. I really enjoyed this one, great content Ben!!!!
I am a new runner and found your channel just so inspiring, you two are clearly sweet and passionate. Watching you saying your feelings about Mark, really made me to write my first comment for you! You are far superior and relatable and vulnerable and these qualities make you and Mary special. I do understand it must have been a process to get over that feeling, but its very important for me that you know, your personality is make you special within this vast of youtubers! Be well and continue to share!
Well done being nice to that runner 👍 Made me smile inside
I’m injured currently so after having had the ‘it’s over, why do I even bother’ thoughts I’m now using it as an opportunity to do what I’ve been told many times over the years…..Pilates. Once I’m back up and running again the Pilates should help massively in an area my ego has always held me back in
Definitely! S&c is the key 🔑 hope you get back soon xxx
Stay strong, you’ll be back.
I'm subscribed to you and Mark Lewis, and enjoy both, you're just different. Also I'll never forget a conversation with a clearly very experienced runner at the end of my first 5 miles in about 10 years without having run, he was really friendly and encouraging. He only lives down the street but I've never bumped into him again, but he cheered me up when I thought I was doing horribly. I always smile and say hello to other runners whether they reply in kind or not because they might be cheered by it, or if not I am. 😊
This should serve as a basis for a course like RUNNING 101; so much wisdom in a single video
Love this channel and Mark's channel too. A rising tide floats all ships, in running and on You Tube!
I love that you stopped this person and have him some support. I bet you made a huge difference in his life! ❤
Running should NEVER be a punishment! You must enjoy those long runs and make the most of it!
Exactly! I tell people running is one of those things you either love or you hate, imo, and if you hate it, there’s no shame in finding an alternative form of exercise. There are sooo many options out there.
Great video, we all need to be reminded of this message,
I used to punish myself with a five mile run, if I lost at football 😢
What a lovely story about that other dude. So nice of you guys to support him and give him a confidence boost.
Great video. I’m 5 years deep at 38 and loving running. Dream is to do a sub 20 5k. I’m the guy who used to scoff at runners and never in a million years would I have thought I’d be into it like I am. Life is mad. Love to all. Keep running!
I think your channel is unique in several ways as you focus on things that get minimized on other runtubers, especially the emotional aspects you focus much more on and that’s overlooked a lot elsewhere!
Loved your videos as usual. Great humor and use of the camera. Ego is one I have to fight. I'm always disappointed when I don't get a podium for me age category so sometimes I train to hard and fast to get to that podium. Running is not all about climbing those steps and get a trophy. Tks for the reminder.
So relatable, i have over 200 videos on my pursue purpose channel with only 600 subscribers. This was the whole reason i started this channel. I know my story telling and filming is sub par, so i need to step it up. Great topic Ben 👏
I just want to say thank you! Thank you for this channel. It's one of those rare truly honest places on the internet.
I started really getting into running last year training for my first half marathon. I have always been relatively active, mostly lifting waits at the gym. I used to run occasionally too but I didn't enjoy it (it was pretty much torture). I decided to give running one more try through signing up for the HM and following your beginner program. The most humbling thing, and the one that changed everything, is that the program started with alternating running and walking intervals. That was so counter-intuitive to me coming from the weight training world where you had to lift more every time and push yourself. I learned that in order to enjoy running, to not feel blood in my mouth, to be red faced, to feel dead after 5K, I needed to slow down. I realised I pushed myself way too much during all these years running due to my ego, comparing myself to others, looking at Strava.
Today, I enjoy running and it helps me every day keep my body and more importantly my head in the right place. Thanks again! You made a difference in my life.
'If it needs to happen, then I make it happen.' I like your style. It's what I live by as well.
Love 10min rule ( used once), but it’s easy to fall into bad traps. Need to be aware of them. I think in running one of the punishments I see most common is I eat (whatever) so need to run to or run extra because.
Excellent video! Such an inspiring first story, and holy crap your editing is so good now. Transitions galore! I was engaged throughout. Content and delivery on point!! Must be hard to come up with running content every week - somehow you manage to do so and make it very entertaining. Top work both. I love the candle quote, i'll remember that!
I just want to let you both know that I completed your 6 week couch to 5 km plan on Friday. Thank you for the video on it, and making it available.
It was big of Ben to admit that feeling of jealousy. I suppose that is a great example of why I love This Messy Happy. It is about running but for me it’s really more about life. I’ve played “The real reason causing your lack of running progress” countless times. It’s truly a metaphor for living a healthy life. Mark Lewis makes me laugh. I need both purpose (Messy Happy) and play (Mark Lewis).
I love your honesty! This is why you guys make my top 3! I religiously watch everything you drop! If anyone is wondering who the other 2 are, Ben Parkes and Stephen Scullion.
Thank you very much for keeping it real!❤
I just want you to know that this channel inspired me a lot til the point I become a guide runner and accomplish a half marthon. The way you explain things and the direction you give to everything helps me a lot to find new ways to enjoy something as normal as running. your advise are not juts applicable to running but they also suit daily life. Thank you for lighting this candle and keeping shining just the way you are !!
I think people find Mark Lewis very relatable because he was a unfit, slightly overweight, non runner, and then turned it all around. Your channel is every bit as good as his, but maybe doesn't appeal to such a wide audience as people see you as a runners runner.
A fair point. Ben is very much an elite runner in my eyes. I find value from both channels.
Yes true. He’s turned his life around and there’s something very inspiring about that. It’s similar to Mary restarting running etc. we all know she’s the MVP of the channel 😂 I tread the line between being a runner but just not being at the Ben Is Running, Welsh Runner, Phily Bowden etc level 😂 it is what it is 😊
@@ThisMessyHappyI think Ben brings the actual coaching element to the content which not many channels have.
Yes ... Exactly... I view Ben as an elite ... Mark ( whom I like as well by the way ) was an average Joe and the whole point was him becoming above average.
Not the case for me. Just started road racing a year ago & their videos have been in steady rotation for us. People like what they like... But I do enjoy binging some mark lewis too 😂😂😂😂
I’m subbed to you, Mark Lewis & Philly Bowden. Everybody trains differently but all are jolly good people who enjoys running differently.
Mark is kinda gearhead with reviews on smartwatches & zwifts quite a bit. You & Mary are real blokes working as educators while running. Philly is living her dream life trying for her ultimate Olympics qualification goal.
I’ve grown from a couch potato 2 years back while listening to your old podcast Fitness Freaks to completing 3 marathons (2 physical & 1 virtual). You keep doing your thing; I keep on jogging.
I found this channel after watching Mark Lewis. I've been binge watching your videos ever since. I love your content and you guys really inspire me. Thank you for all your work, tips, and honesty
TMH and ML are both great channels and I can enjoy both.
Hi TMH. A superb upload. Thank you. You and your wife are superb human beings. You both represent what is good and wonderful about running.
"Happy is he who has overcome his Ego"
Mark Lewis is good, but I prefer This Messy Happy. Your trail running and ultra marathon running is on a different level.
You do an excellent job showing the races and motivated me to get into trail running and ultra marathons!
My suggestion is continue leaning into the trail stuff. It makes you unique.
Your videos are amazing! I always compare myself to others, bc I've veen working extremely hard on my UA-cam channel for the past 2 years straight and I've got nowhere even tho i know my videos are great 😭
Well done for making this video and focusing on thoughts and emotions and making the point about the importance of resilience and how one's ego can be one's worst enemy.
WOW Ben that was certainly a hard watch for me. Guilty of a few of them topics you brought up.
Just missed a 17k trail race that i’d been so looking forward to. A weekend away in the lakes booked. I had to sit and watch instead. BECAUSE i tried running through an injury.
I’d say that’s your BEST episode yet.
Love the positivity at the start of the video. Thanks for all the content, your channel keeps getting better and better!
love you man
Love this, a great reminder
This is the reason why I decided to subscribe to your channel. You and Mary's love for running and runners 🙏🙌.
Great video man!
Editing skills 💯. Great video again Ben! One to keep and watch regularly.
Very good points! Good job!
Love this.
Another good video. I get jealous often but have learned how to control it and I think at this point it is more of a positive. Being jealous and enjoying others success is a life changer. Funny, we all think the latest injury is the the "one" that will cause us to move on from running. I face planted on a treadmill run 2 weeks ago when my sciatic nerve decided to shut down my left leg. Quite excruciating and after laying on the floor for five minutes, managed to pull myself onto the bed. No worries and started rehab immediately. Back running 10 days later and only a slightly slower.
Some really good points raised,very thought provoking,ty
What a lovely message!
Strong video Ben, very strong. Keep up the great output.
Amazing video, Ben. Thank you for highlighting the things that do happen as athletes and how we can turn things around.
Hi! From sweden here, love the channel and keep up the good work ❤
Like others, I've watched a lot of Mark Lewis videos and a lot of them are good while some are simply trying to drive up subscriber numbers with what amount to entertaining stunts - which is fine because he's trying to make a living from YouTubing. But it does make for quite uneven content - the more so because while he's wanting us to watch what he's doing, he's also keen not to be held up as any kind of exemplar of what to do to become better at whatever we do. It's a bit of a mixed message. What I particularly enjoy about your channel is that you and Mary are professional teachers who're unabashed about using your teaching expertise to teach by example - and information - how to get the most out of running. Incredibly helpful. I've now watched many of your videos and they are very consistent, on point each time, and very effectively deliver the enthusiasm and knowledge you to have for and about running. You and Mark are doing two completely different things. You're a running coach, while I guess he primarily sees himself as a fitness-entertainer. Apples and pears. You're not competing for the same audience.
Great video and yes I’ve been guilty of a few of those but I’m also always looking for ways to improve as a runner but more importantly as a person which is why I’m a big fan of this channel and you both.
I really enjoy the content that you guys put out. I’ve said it before but it’s always surprising how much I still learn almost a decade into my running journey. Thanks for all you do
Superb mate. For me, your most relatable vid yet. In fact, there’s so much relatable stuff in it I’ve just immediately rewatched it. Twice! 😅 Now I really have to go, run and my ego is definitely not invited.
Excellent video. Thank you for storytime
Cracking post , 💯 agree. Keep lighting candles 👍
I love your channel so much! ❤🎉 Good vibes & info.
Really good video, lots of great insights. Thank you for sharing.
100% So many great words of wisdom in this video! Love love love it!
I really appreciate your honosty! Your video's are always great to watch, so keep it up! 😊👍
Also love Mark's channel and there is enough space for everyone here on YT!
I’m currently a week behind in my C-5k schedule due to work commitments and now I have a cold. I have however been doing yoga everyday with Adriene thanks to a suggestion in your training plan. Yours and Mary’s level of running is so far ahead of mine I’d be forgiven for thinking it’s not relatable but you are both inspiring (okay so mainly Mary 😂) but I really value your knowledge, experience, honesty and transparency. Thankyou!
Omg brilliant 🎉❤
One of your best videos ever made!
this was an incredible video, really enjoyed it. loved the personal stories and the idea of celebrating other people and runners. very inspiring, love this channel :)
Hi ben! Great video and effort! (I am "FINALLY" noticing some cool weather! It is only 32 degrees Celsius! Cant wait until winter which is amazing thailand! Lets GO!)
Hi. Been following you for years, the honesty in this video really hit the mark so well done. With regards to the comments about Marks channel, I have actually only just come across it. That being said, I use both yours and his channels very differently. I come to you for genuine, accurate and safe advise that I know will get the best out of me not just for today, but for the rest of a long running relationship. You have helped me create training plans, hacks for getting out the door and those painful s+c sessions. The quality of content cannot be understated so thanks buddy. BTW, that candle saying is just absolutely on point. Keep it up!
I love Messy Happy videos. Greets from Mexico.
Im not trying to bash Mark Lewis, i dont believe that i've seen any of his videos, if I have, maybe it didnt grab my attention like your videos have. Please keep the content coming, there are so many layers to your videos, every once in a while when im looking carefully i can say to myself "i see what he did there" weather its a transition in music, change in voice, focus of voice, but it all really comes together in your videos. I really appreciate your channel. thanks for being so inspirational.
Wonderful video 👍👍👍!! Love your channel. Thank you for all you do!! You are making a wonderful impact on the world.
Mark lewis is a general fitness enthusiast so he's appealing to people who do park runs or cycle or swim or lift weights etc etc you're more running focused but love you both ,feel you know more about running than mark
I can't really relate to much you've said but kudos for being so open !
Cracking video Ben. I used to be a lone wolf when it came to running,actually its been 6.5 years of silo running. Thanks to watching your channel I have had the confidence to join my local running group and it has been such a positive move,all thanks to you and Mary. I keep telling them to watch Messy Happy and they are impressed so keep it going.All the best from sunny Wales 😊😊
I found your channel looking for a half marathon training plan. I used to be a regular runner until 4 years ago when my mental health went to shit and stopped doing everything I love. I’ve just entered a half marathon that I’ve done for years, and your enthusiasm is infectious, I can’t wait to find the love for it again. I feel like I’m starting from scratch again, and last year it disheartened me to the point I quit after two weeks of training, but I’m going to stick with it again ❤
thank you, I am glad I click on this particular video... it's inspirational, in a unique way, in a way that, I am like the nervous runner in your story (well not nervous, but new runner, start at pandemi, and so on) and as a new runner there's so much mental challenge to keep running regularly, work, boredom, procrastination and so on..
btw, thanks again for the video...
Very honest very true! Thanks for that video… im in!
Smile a little more as you spread the love ♥️
This was your best video yet! I’m suffering from Sciatica and wondering if I will ever run again!? Definitely about mindset!
Did you video your rehab with a bulged disc?👍
You are/were the person who got me back into running at 45 years old. I was pretty good back in my teens (track/cross country) but really fell off and made some poor health decisions along the way. I love your posts because you talk about running as a lifestyle and a way of life. Competition is not the main focus, although we all want to compete! You and Mary inspire me to do this long term and find a way to enjoy even the mundane runs.
What I love about Mark is he shows me at 50 (49 and change) that you can still compete at a pretty high level and be very healthy coming from a really bad space like he was. His motivations and reasons for running/exercise are different from yours but I think you both nail it on the head when it comes to health, fitness, and motivating your viewers! Never stop being you!! We love you for that! Thank you for all you do!
this was much needed to hear. thank you so so much.
Thank you for the kind words 😊
Your quite about the candle stopped me dead in ny tracks: Absolutely beautiful. I instinctively 'like' your videos as soon as i play them, but that's really not enough
The video did bring some value. Thank you.. There is a depth and honesty with your channel that feels very genuine and I appreciate that.
Ben your channel has truly changed me. You and Mary put out great contents. Keep it up. I binged watched all your videos ❤
I watch Mark Lewis and This Messy Happy not necessarily for the content (it is good though) but for the motivation and the feeling of having running buddies. Mark got me up and running in the beginning of this year in the first place and This Messy Happy keeps me motivated on my journey. Thank you two for that!
Well said. Great video again. I too watch Mark also. In fact his was one of the first running related channels I started watching and still do and through him I found This Messy Happy and now I watch both :-) Keep up the great work. (y)