For the first story, when you brought up the "Giving her time for herself" I think we need to add that it can't be time to do REQUIRED THINGS. The once a week with her headphones on isn't bad, but having her "break" every other day be a 10 minute shower doesn't feel like a real break. And the kids could not even respect that. I bet they probably are either imitating their father, or they don't get any attention from the dad, and so feel abandoned now that their mom has to watch over the baby more than them. This needs to be discussed in their therapy ASAP, because it sounds like this poor woman is so burnt out, and that is worrying for her mental health.
How are 13years old kids acting this way??!! I have a 15,11, and a 5 years old and the oldest ones have always help me, even if they want attention they don’t Interrupt my showers nor do they act incompetent on purpose…it’s about time those kids get real discipline. Jealousy over the baby is acceptable only up until a certain age
Seems like dad is almost non-existent so they're looking for the attention they're missing from the new babay and seemingly not having a dad and when he does get involved it's to undermine his wife reinforcing their behaviour imo.
Story 1 I am a truck driver I work 70 hours a week. When I come home I am full time mom. My ex and I are split. There’s no reason why he can’t help more. Period
the problem with ultimatums is that you have to mean it AND be okay with either answer obviously you can have preferences but in the end whatever they choose you have to accept with grace
That luxury apartment girl does not want to be with him if she won’t move. People will go above and beyond for those they’re in love with. I feel bad for army dude. He deserves better.
I agree with Sam on the "don't try for kids early in a relationship thing." My cousin's in this boat now since she decided it was a great idea to secretly while with a guy she'd only known 2 months and then got pregnant within a month after that. They were already beyond broke with just the two of them, she's about to be unemployed, and thighs are just gonna keep getting more expensive. She's burnt so many bridges that finding out she got pregnant on purpose was the straw that broke the camels back for the family in terms of financial support so they're in their own. I feel bad for that child but their parents have chosen to put them all in this position so it is what it is
On the Kratom story - as a recovering addict - your partner is an addict! Brandon is right in that he needs to go to a program, but please don't view him, his life, his sobriety journey, as your responsibility. It's not. It's on him to go to AA and work on himself and you are not obligated to stick around and wait it out. In my opinion it'll be more healthy and sustainable for you to leave him, find a community to help you raise the child, and seek out resources for single moms. Him getting better is not the answer.
On the military guy and C story, I think it’s her way of saying that she doesn’t want to give up everything for him until they have had some time in person to see if it’s real, which I think is smart. She has had to wait for all the ins and outs of his job for years and be on hold for them to even have an in person relationship and now he wants her to follow him once again. They should live separately and “date” even though they are engaged. They need to know if things are real when not long distance before going all in. It’s been only covid time in person and then years of long distance, for heaven’s sake. They have no idea if they can be married happily.
I think it's also just a difference on the expectations they have for eachother. Like I would personally not follow a partner just because of their job but I also don't expect them to follow me where I go.
I'm sorry, those kids are too old to be acting the way they do. If my mom had told me not to bother her in the shower or while listening to headphones, you better believe I would have listened! I sounds like these kids don't have a healty understanding of "consequences for your actions". They need to learn!
"Worse than being a single parent" YES the complete and uder hopelessness you feel when you r drowning and ur partner is a spectator. Also most 12 hour jobs are rotating 3 and 4 days a week. Or it's not a permanent 12 hour shift. Never seen a perm 12 hr days 5 days a week job
1:04:28 didn’t they just wait four years until he got his orders to come back to the area that she’s in because she didn’t wanna move back to Arizona? So like how many more years are they supposed to wait and especially because things did lineup he got orders to come back near her and she wants to give this up for an apartment.😮
Please if you are with someone who has substance abuse issues (and that man does) and is not being a good partner, do not have unprotected sex with them. Maybe they were having protected sex and the child was an accident, and I don’t want to blame her because I feel so awful for her situation. But for anyone else in a toxic relationship or with someone who is an addict, do not try to start a family with them while these issues are still ongoing. They are not in a situation to support a child or be a good partner. As someone who grew up with a parent that was an addict, your child needs better than that. And for OP, please leave. When your child is old enough to recognize this behavior, they are going to suffer for it. You and your child deserve so much better and I hope the best for you.
I agree with Sam having a child should be a decision made after knowing the person for atleast 7 years in my opinion. Not a few months in that is insanity
1:00:11 first of all I’m sure that that apartment complex has other residents availabilities in different areas because the DMV is all together so whatever’s available in Alexandria is probably also available in Maryland or in DC somewhere closer to his physician
The army dude. If you’re in the military, you need to have someone that understands what you go through and that will be supportive. I’ve been in the position of having to deal with someone that opposed me at every turn and it was horrible (I’m an Army officer too). He did a lot to accommodate her which is not easy at all, and she didn’t appreciate it or even tried to compromise. You gotta move on, my dude.
when you guys talked about boss baby, i was reminded by my brain that my first bf (17) had the entire intro memorized. i found out when we’re randomly turned on boss baby and he recited it. i didn’t even know he had seen the movie
LOL not madi’s overexcitement at KRATOMMM! 🤣 at this point i’m convinced madi and sam are the same person 😂 there’s bouncing off other people you have a rapport with and then there’s these two haha who would have thought this was an enemies to besties podcast trope LOL p.s madi your smile is actually so cute and contagious 😆 i could be in the worst mood but when you crack a smile or laugh at the shenanigans afoot i can’t help but smile or laugh too 😂 😳 i’m a heterosexual woman i promise i’m not in love with you madi lmaooo i just clocked how i sound the past few comments 🤣 i just really appreciate y’all ☺️ ❤ (also i don’t know how it went from me about to say i just love sam’s goofy ass to complimenting madi instead but yeah 😂) & brandon‘s just precious 🤣 there’s been times i rewind the stories just to watch brandon’s facial expressions because he is so empathetic it warms my heart (and his smile 🥺) but i think i see myself in brandon the most in terms of behaviour which is why i fan girl over madi and sam more because they represent the parts of me i just keep inside my head for fear of being ostracized LOL sorry for the cr*ckhead energy this comment is giving off i promise i’m not on kratom - but i did just take my adhd pill so 🤪 let’s hope i can chill out now haha 🫠
I really love the show but you guys will tangent more than anything and don’t really read the comments soo if it possible could you guys read the Reddit comments more
I think that’s the point of the podcast tho. They don’t just read the stories and move on they also give their point of views which will sometimes lead into conversation that get side track like any convo would. But a lot of people enjoy that part of the podcast. I listen to a few podcasts like this and they all have tangents in it.
The sad part on the military story is that "C" won't give up anything or come up with a solution other than "C" getting what she wants and or keeping what she has. While the OP does everything, he can keep her conformable and go with what she wants. The OP is ready for marriage and doing whatever to be together, the problem is "C" hell bent on what she wants and won't consider anything else.
First story, the punishment is a bit much but I fully understand that she’s at her wits end. The husband should sign her up for a spa day, a girl’s day, a day with out kids day, or maybe even a full weekend…and let her get away and decompress then she’ll be able to come back refreshed and renewed and ready to love on the kids again. Taking the electronics away is just going to make the kids be bored and on her more 😂. Put them in some extra curricular activities that’ll get their energy out during the day. Setup play dates.
Kids need to learn to be bored. They should not NEED electronics to fill their time. There’s a million things that can do that don’t require a tablet or game system. My 4 year old knows how to entertain himself without a tablet. If she’s touched out she probably doesn’t want a spa day. What would be helpful is to not have a partner who’s an actual idiot.
@@NicaMiller I have 5 kids, one a newborn that I’m currently breastfeeding darn near 24/7, so I know what it’s like to be “touched out” anddddd I would happily take a massage/spa day. Not really sure why you decided you have all the answers for every person who’s experiencing something🤷🏽♀️ it was one option I gave as well as a day with her friends or just whatever she decides, idk why spa day trigged you so much. The electronics comment was a joke, hence the laughing emoji. I then said to put them in sports, extra curriculars, play dates, etc. as an actual solution….
Love listening to your shows. I started listening a couple of months ago and went through the entire back catalog. I have noticed a bit of a bad trend though. You guys seem to go easy on the women in these discussions. Most of these AITA stories are of men being absolute pieces of sh*t towards their significant others and you guys (very rightfully) take them to task. But (as in the case of this last story) when women are in the wrong, you tend to give a lot of excuses. In this case you have a man that is working hard and busting his butt to get stationed closer to his fiance and she is reciprocating exactly 0% of this energy. Her biggest concern seems to be keeping this nice apartment that she's found, despite the years of hard work this man has put in just to be close to her. We get a lot of 'maybe she doesn't want to be in a marriage where her husband is absent all of the time' which is valid, but it's very easy for her to just say that. I think you settled on the right advice, that their lives/careers don't line up right now, and they might not be right for each other, but why is it okay for her to leave this man in limbo and have him put in all of this time and effort when she's not giving anything in return? Just wanted to call your attention to this issue. As I said, I think you ultimately gave the right advice, but maybe just hold everyone to the same level of accountability.
Was the second story. I feel bad for the young lady having to go through that. But didn't she say that they were trying to have a baby so that means he was like this before and she still was trying to have a baby with him 🤦🏿♂️
For the first story, when you brought up the "Giving her time for herself" I think we need to add that it can't be time to do REQUIRED THINGS. The once a week with her headphones on isn't bad, but having her "break" every other day be a 10 minute shower doesn't feel like a real break. And the kids could not even respect that. I bet they probably are either imitating their father, or they don't get any attention from the dad, and so feel abandoned now that their mom has to watch over the baby more than them. This needs to be discussed in their therapy ASAP, because it sounds like this poor woman is so burnt out, and that is worrying for her mental health.
How are 13years old kids acting this way??!! I have a 15,11, and a 5 years old and the oldest ones have always help me, even if they want attention they don’t Interrupt my showers nor do they act incompetent on purpose…it’s about time those kids get real discipline. Jealousy over the baby is acceptable only up until a certain age
Seems like dad is almost non-existent so they're looking for the attention they're missing from the new babay and seemingly not having a dad and when he does get involved it's to undermine his wife reinforcing their behaviour imo.
Story 1 I am a truck driver I work 70 hours a week. When I come home I am full time mom. My ex and I are split. There’s no reason why he can’t help more. Period
the problem with ultimatums is that you have to mean it AND be okay with either answer obviously you can have preferences but in the end whatever they choose you have to accept with grace
the "where's my dad?!" bit kills me!! also the first story just needs to watch Bluey that mama needs "20 minutes"
The way Maddie screams story every time someone says “like this next story” 😂😂😂 yall are def my comfort podcast.
That luxury apartment girl does not want to be with him if she won’t move. People will go above and beyond for those they’re in love with. I feel bad for army dude. He deserves better.
Man I absolutely love listening to you guys. Whether it is bed time, working out, going for a walk or working. You guys always make me laugh.
I agree with Sam on the "don't try for kids early in a relationship thing." My cousin's in this boat now since she decided it was a great idea to secretly while with a guy she'd only known 2 months and then got pregnant within a month after that. They were already beyond broke with just the two of them, she's about to be unemployed, and thighs are just gonna keep getting more expensive. She's burnt so many bridges that finding out she got pregnant on purpose was the straw that broke the camels back for the family in terms of financial support so they're in their own. I feel bad for that child but their parents have chosen to put them all in this position so it is what it is
Nah Brandon editing the ep and then coming in from behind the scenes saying there was no cut is so funny to me 😭
Came to make this exact comment 😂😂
the thing Brandon can't remember at 1:09:45 is called the sunken cost fallacy
On the Kratom story - as a recovering addict - your partner is an addict! Brandon is right in that he needs to go to a program, but please don't view him, his life, his sobriety journey, as your responsibility. It's not. It's on him to go to AA and work on himself and you are not obligated to stick around and wait it out. In my opinion it'll be more healthy and sustainable for you to leave him, find a community to help you raise the child, and seek out resources for single moms. Him getting better is not the answer.
Yes, Ivy being on was amazing! What tough stories, especially the mom ones dang. Can't wait for the next episode!
On the military guy and C story, I think it’s her way of saying that she doesn’t want to give up everything for him until they have had some time in person to see if it’s real, which I think is smart. She has had to wait for all the ins and outs of his job for years and be on hold for them to even have an in person relationship and now he wants her to follow him once again. They should live separately and “date” even though they are engaged. They need to know if things are real when not long distance before going all in. It’s been only covid time in person and then years of long distance, for heaven’s sake. They have no idea if they can be married happily.
I think it's also just a difference on the expectations they have for eachother. Like I would personally not follow a partner just because of their job but I also don't expect them to follow me where I go.
For the woman with the guy that did t want to be a dad maybe try getting an Alexa that will announce his chores
Honest to god I love that. What a story.
I live alone but might have to use the Alexa that way 😂😂
I'm sorry, those kids are too old to be acting the way they do. If my mom had told me not to bother her in the shower or while listening to headphones, you better believe I would have listened! I sounds like these kids don't have a healty understanding of "consequences for your actions". They need to learn!
oh 30:10 she's basically a single mom
i love hearing Ivy’s input
The editing part- I LOVE I love when we get a cute lil note from the editor 🫶
when you press the time stamps and hear sams laugh at the beginning every time without fail
"Worse than being a single parent" YES the complete and uder hopelessness you feel when you r drowning and ur partner is a spectator.
Also most 12 hour jobs are rotating 3 and 4 days a week. Or it's not a permanent 12 hour shift. Never seen a perm 12 hr days 5 days a week job
I wonder if the kids from the first story are imitating the father.
1:04:28 didn’t they just wait four years until he got his orders to come back to the area that she’s in because she didn’t wanna move back to Arizona? So like how many more years are they supposed to wait and especially because things did lineup he got orders to come back near her and she wants to give this up for an apartment.😮
Please if you are with someone who has substance abuse issues (and that man does) and is not being a good partner, do not have unprotected sex with them. Maybe they were having protected sex and the child was an accident, and I don’t want to blame her because I feel so awful for her situation. But for anyone else in a toxic relationship or with someone who is an addict, do not try to start a family with them while these issues are still ongoing. They are not in a situation to support a child or be a good partner. As someone who grew up with a parent that was an addict, your child needs better than that. And for OP, please leave. When your child is old enough to recognize this behavior, they are going to suffer for it. You and your child deserve so much better and I hope the best for you.
I agree with Sam having a child should be a decision made after knowing the person for atleast 7 years in my opinion. Not a few months in that is insanity
And even then, good luck. Because some people really can put on a front for that long or suddenly change.
1:00:11 first of all I’m sure that that apartment complex has other residents availabilities in different areas because the DMV is all together so whatever’s available in Alexandria is probably also available in Maryland or in DC somewhere closer to his physician
The mother is struggling mentally he needs to support her more obviously! Love you guys btw x
The army dude. If you’re in the military, you need to have someone that understands what you go through and that will be supportive. I’ve been in the position of having to deal with someone that opposed me at every turn and it was horrible (I’m an Army officer too). He did a lot to accommodate her which is not easy at all, and she didn’t appreciate it or even tried to compromise. You gotta move on, my dude.
Glad to see more of Ivy, she did great ☺️!
my older sister at 19 years on this earth once asked me how to boil water. i had to go sit down for a moment. she is older by 3 whole years
Gonna need women to stop getting pregnant for these type of men in story 1 and 2 😒 especially if you saw signs from before
💯
Brandon’s such a sweetheart lmao, showed the timeline 😭 ya’ll are so crazy.
when you guys talked about boss baby, i was reminded by my brain that my first bf (17) had the entire intro memorized. i found out when we’re randomly turned on boss baby and he recited it. i didn’t even know he had seen the movie
Love these thanks for the upload
LOL not madi’s overexcitement at KRATOMMM! 🤣 at this point i’m convinced madi and sam are the same person 😂 there’s bouncing off other people you have a rapport with and then there’s these two haha who would have thought this was an enemies to besties podcast trope LOL p.s madi your smile is actually so cute and contagious 😆 i could be in the worst mood but when you crack a smile or laugh at the shenanigans afoot i can’t help but smile or laugh too 😂 😳 i’m a heterosexual woman i promise i’m not in love with you madi lmaooo i just clocked how i sound the past few comments 🤣 i just really appreciate y’all ☺️ ❤ (also i don’t know how it went from me about to say i just love sam’s goofy ass to complimenting madi instead but yeah 😂) & brandon‘s just precious 🤣 there’s been times i rewind the stories just to watch brandon’s facial expressions because he is so empathetic it warms my heart (and his smile 🥺) but i think i see myself in brandon the most in terms of behaviour which is why i fan girl over madi and sam more because they represent the parts of me i just keep inside my head for fear of being ostracized LOL sorry for the cr*ckhead energy this comment is giving off i promise i’m not on kratom - but i did just take my adhd pill so 🤪 let’s hope i can chill out now haha 🫠
I really love the show but you guys will tangent more than anything and don’t really read the comments soo if it possible could you guys read the Reddit comments more
I think that’s the point of the podcast tho. They don’t just read the stories and move on they also give their point of views which will sometimes lead into conversation that get side track like any convo would. But a lot of people enjoy that part of the podcast. I listen to a few podcasts like this and they all have tangents in it.
The sad part on the military story is that "C" won't give up anything or come up with a solution other than "C" getting what she wants and or keeping what she has. While the OP does everything, he can keep her conformable and go with what she wants. The OP is ready for marriage and doing whatever to be together, the problem is "C" hell bent on what she wants and won't consider anything else.
Awwww I like Ivy!
Madi is such a legend!
Sam said I know some ish bout y’all that make gunna wunna look like a saint 🤣🤣🤣
Omg what a treat!!
bulletproof chest took me out, was not expecting that hahaha
First story, the punishment is a bit much but I fully understand that she’s at her wits end. The husband should sign her up for a spa day, a girl’s day, a day with out kids day, or maybe even a full weekend…and let her get away and decompress then she’ll be able to come back refreshed and renewed and ready to love on the kids again. Taking the electronics away is just going to make the kids be bored and on her more 😂. Put them in some extra curricular activities that’ll get their energy out during the day. Setup play dates.
Kids need to learn to be bored. They should not NEED electronics to fill their time. There’s a million things that can do that don’t require a tablet or game system. My 4 year old knows how to entertain himself without a tablet. If she’s touched out she probably doesn’t want a spa day. What would be helpful is to not have a partner who’s an actual idiot.
@@NicaMiller I have 5 kids, one a newborn that I’m currently breastfeeding darn near 24/7, so I know what it’s like to be “touched out” anddddd I would happily take a massage/spa day. Not really sure why you decided you have all the answers for every person who’s experiencing something🤷🏽♀️ it was one option I gave as well as a day with her friends or just whatever she decides, idk why spa day trigged you so much.
The electronics comment was a joke, hence the laughing emoji. I then said to put them in sports, extra curriculars, play dates, etc. as an actual solution….
Me and Madi always watch all the same content!!!!!❤
Are the rumors true?! Are Maddie and Brandon not together anymore?? 😢
Whaaat, someone tell us..
The first story's solution is simple. Practice safe sex. Use protection.
6 MINS AGO IS WILD HI IVY!!!!!!
I miss the old thumbnails with the text in them
Love listening to your shows. I started listening a couple of months ago and went through the entire back catalog. I have noticed a bit of a bad trend though. You guys seem to go easy on the women in these discussions. Most of these AITA stories are of men being absolute pieces of sh*t towards their significant others and you guys (very rightfully) take them to task. But (as in the case of this last story) when women are in the wrong, you tend to give a lot of excuses.
In this case you have a man that is working hard and busting his butt to get stationed closer to his fiance and she is reciprocating exactly 0% of this energy. Her biggest concern seems to be keeping this nice apartment that she's found, despite the years of hard work this man has put in just to be close to her. We get a lot of 'maybe she doesn't want to be in a marriage where her husband is absent all of the time' which is valid, but it's very easy for her to just say that.
I think you settled on the right advice, that their lives/careers don't line up right now, and they might not be right for each other, but why is it okay for her to leave this man in limbo and have him put in all of this time and effort when she's not giving anything in return?
Just wanted to call your attention to this issue. As I said, I think you ultimately gave the right advice, but maybe just hold everyone to the same level of accountability.
ivy is so pretty i love their smile
Was the second story. I feel bad for the young lady having to go through that. But didn't she say that they were trying to have a baby so that means he was like this before and she still was trying to have a baby with him 🤦🏿♂️
Hey!!!
Holy shit I’m early. Thank you for this
Get into the choppaaaaa 😂
Forget the calendar he is NOT a kid.
Why have a baby with such a person? Be sure not to get pregnant again lady!
why aren’t 8 and 13 yr olds in school?
😂
What is Sam's insta???!?