John Wick: Chapter Portobello
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- Опубліковано 4 лип 2019
- John Wick: Chapter Portobello is a short film entirely written by AI. It follows John Wick and his dog going off against a big Russian mob man and his minions. It's a heartbreaking story about John's struggles, and since John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum recently came out I figured it's perfect to make this.
Credits for the script go to Keaton Patti (@KeatonPatti) on twitter with his post "I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of the John Wick movies", and even though this script maybe wasn't written by a bot after all, it's still hilarious.
Thanks RobenSikk for the John Wick model: / @robensikk
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1 like = 1 alive dog for john
Chipotle
It's me Shaptic from the discord
*_F_*
@surreal entertainment orange nya nya style recreation when >:(
We all like alive dog
When John Wick gets hit by a car
_The cars die_
chuck norris makes john wick jokes
Lol
Coz that's how mafia works
john wick doesnt get hit by cars
*cars get hit by john wick*
*The car company owner dies*
“You are out of horse, Mr. Dog.”
You are out of dog, Mr. Horse
Mr. Horse, dog of out are you?
Hol horse
Mr. Dorse, you are hog out of you!
John throws the horse
So no one in the comments is going to acknowledge how cool the line "I'm retiring from being retired is"?
HoRsE rUnGuS Foolish. You should not have brought your heads. Foolish.
I am
i acknowledge this cool fact.
Jesus Christ has risen!
Didn’t you acknowledge that?
Friend: What was your favorite part of the new John Wick Movie?
Me: I really liked when John used the horse as a gun.
Friend: What?
Me:Mom I want john wick
Mom: we have John wick at home
John wick at home:
@I Am Sadness 😂
What are you talking about I thought this was the movie john wick.
@@ignaciorodriguez3692 😂
It is the real movie
Do you think you are being witty or cool by using an overused and unfunny format or something? The meme was never funny in the slightest to anybody with the intelligence above that of a cro-magnon. But I suppose those internet points were just too tempting for your minuscule brain, weren't they?
"No! That dog was like my dead wife. Now it is dead like my dead wife."
Lmao
That wife was like my dead dog
@@TalentedUser Woah, I'm sorry for your los- wait a minute...
That dead dog is like my wife...........unfortunately 😂😂😂😂
@@kylejordan2610 my dead dog is my wife
I swEar
"That dog was like my dead wife. Now it is dead like my dead wife."
"I am retiring from being retired."
-The true John Wick
you ran out of horse
1000 subs with no video challenge oh
*I care not. My father is Russia.*
- Big mob man
"The cars die..."
"John lives more..."
*_”I am retiring from being retired.”_*
*_What sorcery is this?_*
Top 10 epic oneliners.
What!
Yes
**John reaches into his mouth and pulls out a pistol.**
You are out of horse, Mr. Dog
~BIG MOB MAN, 2019
Wick: *DOGGO WAR FLASHBACKS*
The horse goes back to it's job as horse 😂
BIG MOB MAN:You’re out of horse, Mr.Dog.
John Wick:Hold my Dodge.
I saw this as i read it
But what happened to the remaining 21000 mob men? I demand a sequel.
They're retiring.
@@notrigescnt4498 From being retired
@@adamshachar5521 indeed
@@adamshachar5521 *proceeds to pull a gun out of the mouth*
They died because of le horsy
Everyone: I'm retiring from being retired.
Me, an intellectual: Foolish. You should not have brought your heads. Foolish.
*That dog was like my dead wife.*
*Now it is dead like my dead wife*
*-Michael Vick-* John Wick, 2019
Michael Vick is a football that
Lmao
I am retiring form being retired.
Only Keanu Reeves is able to go 1 v 59 000 and get 17 000 headshots without reloading.
yes
Keanu Reeves is the new chuck norris or what?
And make them hate that
*using a horse as a gun
And every singleplayer fps main hero (if it's not "very" realistic)
I love that script, he is so creative.
Big Mob man: No.
Jesus Christ is beautiful but he's aggressive and has soft side 😭
The Matrix would've made more sense if they left this scene in the movie.
Underrated comment
My bud : Have you watched new john wick moive
Me : yes, its already on youtube
We should make an alysium for the AI
You spelled movie wrong
Tracy Mason Whoooosh
Will you do this too? AI wrote a script and make a animation bout it?
I'm going to destroy youtubr
*My father is Russia*
- Every mobster that ever existed
Oh shit that's deep
Oh shit that's not deep
That's deep
@@bram5480 Oh shit that's 173
oh shit that's dip
I love alive dog
-John Wick 2019
*B Y E*
No! That dog was like my dead wife, Now it is dead like my dead wife.
dead dog sucks
@@theshycryo I care not. My father is Russia.
59000 mob men come out of the car to throw bullets at John.
He might actually sweat a bit but I wouldn't count on it
Just casually throwing bullets.
Everybody gangsta until John Wick pulls out a horse.
Oh bad, he knows about horses
_Horses have now officially been banned from use in war-time by the United Nations. Using horse is now considered a war-crime_
*mr dog
Oh shit, gotta horse.
Guns: Exist
Horses: *“I’m about to end this mans whole career”*
This ai that wrote the script has a future in the movie industry.
No! That dog was like my dead wife. Now if is dead like my dead wife.
They’re coming for Steven Spielberg’s neck 😂
My father is russia
Gets hired for universal 2 minutes later
it wasn't an AI, look in the description
Big Mob Man: *My father is Russia*
Hmm, I wonder who his mother could be...
Ukraine
Russia
I lost my shit when he said that. My stomach hurts from laughing.
Tom Riddle Poland
Serbia
"That Was The Most Heart Warming Animation I've Seen In A Lifeline, I Cried About 6 Times, Like So Surreal Can See"
No that dog was like my dead wife
Now it is DEAD like my DEAD WIFE
Log Boi that part hade me dead
@@gagecross3318 like John wicks dead wife
Log Boi 😂😂😂🤠🤠🤠
I care not. My dad is Russia.
That quote was too sad :(
1967: In the future we will have horse guns!
2019: *flying cars*
yEs
111 likes
Actually funny.
Where did we go wrong
Nuice
Surreal made an actually decent model for John wick I’m impressed
I think he just ripped the Fortnite one
AwkwardAngel oooh you’re probably right lol
@@awkwardangel5666
Idiot, read the description.
"RobenSikk"
Ary o ' U ' o no your breathtaking
John Wick is naturally decent lmao
I thought about becoming a writer. but I will never be able to beat the Ai's writing skills. RIP my future.
At least I watched John wick for free. Instead of paying to watch it
зарплатой колбасы прайс сука блядь that what I called surprise watching
I have to idea wth u just typed
@@fuckyourselfgoogle4019 I didn't know "idea" was not only a noun but also a verb. What does it mean that way?
The free version is better than the normal version imo
Miha Strajnar he typed "t" imstead of "n" like this I have -to- no idea wth u just typed
Video: Keanu Reeves
Video Length: 420
Perfectly balanced, as all things should be
oK someone else realized the video length is 4:20 too
@@kiara0861 my browser states 4:19
i must be in ｓａｆｅ ｍｏｄｅ
@@thomaskaldahl196 real joke is in the comments
I literally only clicked on this video because it was 4:20 long
You will go far in life, my friend
Plot twist that M Night Shymalan didn't even see coming. Dog was gun all along
It was foreshadowed very lightly through the whole film, with everything being a gun. Only a genius could see it coming.
Neur0s1s
I mean the guy did buy it from *Weapon City*
After shooting everyone in the head:
"Foolish, You should not have brought your heads.Foolish".🤣🤣🤣
“In the future we’ll have flying cars”
2019: HORSE GUNS.
Best possible universe, I’d say.
This meme is so fucking dead
Darnit, they've already passed us in intelligence. Goodbye world.
AI:I lOvE aLiVe DoG
Me:THEY KNOW HOW TO REPLICATE HUMAN BEHAVIOUR REEEEE
'John holds dog and walks home. Big Mob Man pulls gun out of his ear and points at John's back, but John knows all ear tricks. John turns, aims dog at Big Mob Man, and fires.'
Big mob man: Level 1 Crook
John Wick: Level 100 Boss
'a horse walks by. john grabs it and fires it like a gun'
He is John Wick, he can defy logic.
Jordan Polson no he just knows about horses
When two surreals combine, u get the ultimate content.
The song really suited the ending it was so memorable
John Wick IS a weapon
Then Dog BECAME a weapon
@@Uglipeanutz I love you
_"You are out of horse, Mr. Dog!"_
Honestly surreal entertainment is probably an AI
And he writes his on scripts
No clue what is going on.
10/10
Me too love alive dog
no 11/10
The fact that the video is 4:20 long makes it even better
You have scammed me, it is a second short
It could happen in cyber punk 2077 back story of john wick.
You couldn’t have been more right
I would watch an Avengers movie by an a.i, this was better than most action movies.
Cogniferous yes good
@@thanos4959 Thanos takes the stones and punches with a gauntlet.
"I am Thanos picks up a stone"
It was true art
@@Woozy0 let's just write it with predictive keyboard.
@@Woozy0 example: Thanos took the end words when
"You will hear a buzzer. When you hear a buzzer, look at that painting, on the wall."
*BEEEP*
"This is art."
Good fuckin' reference there, sneaky boi.
where is my classical music
Nice reference
Foolish. You should not have brought your heads. *Foolish.*
Gravestone for cars:
Rip cars .
1970-2019.
Quote: "I am speed"
Wow, 24 people liked this unfunny comment. UA-cam in a nutshell
*crying* this is the most beautiful shit i have ever read wouldn't you agree?
7 eleven clerk: yeah but please put the gun down
No *pulls out horse and fires*
Please keep doing these AI videos, they are so entertaining because you feel like you can predict what will happen but you can’t, no matter what you just cant
The scene at 3:51 always gets me cracking up with just how perfectly it syncs with the music
*_”Lets build a truce. Take present.”_*
Live dog appears from the dog store.
*John wick runs outta ammo*
*John wick pulls out paper*
Enemy: Oh sh@t he we go again
Oh shat
*pulls out meat scepter*
"John wick Portabello is an anime that will be talked about for years to come, simple, but so breathtaking." ~ weeb
I love how 21,000 of the mob men live
2:39 John wick trilogy has some of the most brilliant fighting scenes ever.
Ikr it’s so realistic
Finally, a comment that acknowledges it
“My father is Russia”
Wait a minute, isn’t Russia the motherland?
I Am Sadness no Russia is everyone’s gender, it’s in a super position of being all 39 genders at the same time.
* Slav intensifies...*
Caitlyn Jenner is Russia
Simple, it's now the motherfather land
hOLY FRICK RUSSIA IS A TRAP-
"It goes back to its job as a horse." 💀💀💀
"I'm retiring from being retired."
Best line ever.
"Come here, dog. I love alive dog."
These are so god damned funny, these animations are priceless, we need more AI writers.
.
.
.
AI: "I Can't My Father Is RUSSIA"
"I care not. My father is Russia"
Well yes but acctully N O
"John is hit by several cars. The cars die."
@@Danilego 🤣
“In the future, humor will be randomly generated”
Somehow, the script made by an AI made more sense than your ideas. Weird.
The Moon Is Fake ikr, he could’ve easily passed this off as original (insert conspiracy theory that SE is actually a robot)
1:02 How to get past airport security.
*Pass
worthy of an oscar
john wick slapped the mob men harder than Will Smith slapped chris rock
The music is what seals it in the end!
When Keanu reeves gets used to bully ten year olds online *anger*
it said portabella, like the mushroom, so i was prepared for a john wick cooking show
lol
portabella is the name of the mushroom not portobello
whoopsie
John Wisk
*Literally shoots a horse*
“Oh no, he knows about horses”
“Foolish!” “You shouldn’t have brought your heads” “Foolish.” “ oh bad, he knows about horses” lmao🤣
Interesting story, realistic acting. When Big Mob Man bought John a dog, I cried. A true masterpiece.
"I'm retiring from being retired" sounds like a legitimate line from one of these movies.
"Foolish. You should not have brought your heads. Foolish."
Me: Mom can we have epic action fighting scene
Mom: No we have epic action fighting scene at home
Epic action fighting scene at home: 2:43
I love these so much. Please make more. I need laughter in my life. Thanks.
Also, I love alive dog too. I shall grab one from dog store.
"No! That dog was like my dead wife. Now it is dead like my dead wife"
This is sad and funny at the same time.
How is it dad at all. Its funny
@@saitamacraft5322 Dad at all
SaitamaCraft dad at all
John Wick 4: Into the Wick-Verse looks great
Onto the wicki
_"But John knows all about ear trick."_
This video has changed my life is so many ways you cannot begin to understand. I feel more complete in each and everyway because I watched your video. Thanks 🙏.
Alive dog is my favorite kind of dog
The Legend says that he is still crying for his Dog :(
00:57
When you finnaly got a new job.
The music at the end gives a good vibe that I can't explain
Best movie of John Wick ever, deserves an Oscar!
*B A Z I N G A.*
I feel like everytime I watch a surreal video, an angel comes down from above to watch over me
This brought tears to my eyes. Truly breathtaking.
This is the best video on all of UA-cam and I demand more
*"i cArE nOT. My fATheR IS rUssIa"*
Why did the mob man’s face look like Michael Keaton?
Birdman confirmed for John Wick 4?
because his fahter is russia
And yet sounded like Jerry Seinfeld?
Bat\birdman/vulture is a russian?
Why does John Wick still look so good even in a lower budget animation??? I love Surreal Ent so freaking much.
I'm being seriously
This is the most beautiful animation that he ever made
Everything on it is perfect
And the script is the entire movie itself
*"My father is Russia."* A whole Russia is your father? This man is REDiculous
Mad Cheburek *fake crowd laughing*
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
@@IAteAChickfilaChickenSandwich true story😏😏😏
No one:
Thicc guy: my father is russia
John: *I aM rEtiRiNG FrOm BeinG REtirED*
Content perfect as always
"foolish you should not have brought your heads. foolish"
- john wick
An A.I. system now writes movies & TV shows. 🤖
Why do we need Hollywood anymore? 😱
Because this is a running joke by comedian writer Keaton Patti. Even if you don't know him, it tells you in the description. Think before you speak next time. 👌
The Game ummm maybe you should follow your own advice instead
@@sappyme Because I'm correct and you don't like that?
@@JustLostTheGame why are you acting smart? He's obviously making a joke
@@freshikan9564 Well, that's not really a joke, that's all. It's really not a big deal lmao
Showed this to my dad and he thought it was John wick 3
Your animation is perfect for these AI scripts. I hope you do more
*_script is subject to NOT CHANGING, it is perfect as it is._*
Alive doggos are better Than dead doggos