There's Always That One Entitled Friend... - REACTION

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  • Опубліковано 19 вер 2022
  • There's Always That One Entitled Friend...SUBSCRIBE! bit.ly/2DxtJhM
    INSTAGRAM: / charlaychaplin
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    Hey ya'll! Today on my channel we are reacting to . Enjoy
    #entitled #entitledfriend #entitledpeople #reaction #charlottedobreio #react #reactionchannel #charlottedobreio #charlottedobre
    Hi, I'm Charlotte Dobre. I'm an actor, reactor, singer and sometimes (not really) comedian. On this channel I do reactions, commentary and occasionally I make a joke or two. I upload daily, usually 7 days a week, unless life gets crazy or I get lazy. Come hang out, it's a good time.
    Edited By Kelly Paoli
    kellypaoli...
    Produced by: KOMI
    End screen song:
    Defunk - (Feat. Charlotte Dobre, Sam Klass)
    open.spotify.com/track/3S6FXA...
  • Розваги

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,9 тис.

  • @CharlotteDobre
    @CharlotteDobre  Рік тому +555

    Go buy my moms book! www.ccattaneo.com/

    • @agalesz
      @agalesz Рік тому +59

      Charlotte endorsing her moms book is the most wholsome thing I saw today

    • @JulieTuckerWolek
      @JulieTuckerWolek Рік тому +32

      Done! Can't wait to read it!

    • @CharlotteDobre
      @CharlotteDobre  Рік тому +37

      @@JulieTuckerWolek thank you Julie! I know she really appreciates it!

    • @DaisyA-04
      @DaisyA-04 Рік тому +20

      @@CharlotteDobre - I bought it last night! Looking forward to reading it.

    • @aniasmirkin-bazejewska810
      @aniasmirkin-bazejewska810 Рік тому +11

      Done! I'm so excited to read it! 😄

  • @ramachandra776
    @ramachandra776 Рік тому +1721

    Huge congratulations to your mother for publishing her first novel .

    • @lkayh
      @lkayh Рік тому +23

      I second that-it’s a huge accomplishment!

    • @laurenmcelroy6127
      @laurenmcelroy6127 Рік тому +6

      Yes Charlotte please 🙏 😍 let us know how she does in NY on the best-seller list 😄 congrats to you also for your show!!! ❤️ from Texas

    • @aussiefamily4886
      @aussiefamily4886 Рік тому +5

      Congratulations to ur mum Charlotte also to u we all know where u get ur amazingness ( dont know if that's a word but yup it is now lol) hope u both get everything u want and more love from Australia the land down under

    • @sarahobah
      @sarahobah Рік тому +3

      I clicked like so it wouldn't be 666 and someone unclicked so it stayed at 666 🤣🤦

    • @revondamehovic3132
      @revondamehovic3132 Рік тому +5

      Clearly awesome runs in the family!

  • @TheLuxVex
    @TheLuxVex Рік тому +4028

    Char, you've mentioned your entitled ex friend way too many times. PLEASE, stop torturing us and tell us the story, we're dying here 😂 obviously use fake names and what not, but the curiosity is too much. Either way, thanks for the amazing content

    • @scottgrimmie5645
      @scottgrimmie5645 Рік тому +74

      We want The scoop

    • @tysenstein1691
      @tysenstein1691 Рік тому +211

      I was scrolling through the comments,saw the first half and gasped.thought this was a negative comment😂

    • @reginamushi6582
      @reginamushi6582 Рік тому +67

      @@tysenstein1691 same here 😂

    • @CharlotteDobre
      @CharlotteDobre  Рік тому +2542

      Honestly I did talk about it at the end of this video but I ended up cutting it out. I’m still pretty upset about it tbh.

    • @Readyforit7723
      @Readyforit7723 Рік тому +405

      @@CharlotteDobre it’s fine take your time def no pressure :)

  • @lottiecaldwell8627
    @lottiecaldwell8627 Рік тому +310

    My "friend" did exactly this - set me up on a blind double-date despite me being in a committed relationship for two years. I was so upset I called my Bf to come and get me. That night was the end of our friendship 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @MonsterPrincessLala
      @MonsterPrincessLala Рік тому +23

      Good for you for standing up for yourself! Bless!

    • @mumplaysthesims8396
      @mumplaysthesims8396 3 місяці тому +9

      This person was never a friend. Friends support each other and want the best for each other and this person had none of those feelings in their heart

    • @ScarletAngleGaara
      @ScarletAngleGaara 2 місяці тому +5

      This is late but I’m convinced “friends” who do this are miserable people and are jealous that you are happy. Anyone who goes out of their way to sabotage their friend’s relationship for any reason has got to be a very unhappy person. Nobody who is content in life goes around trying to sabotage other people’s happiness. People who are unhappy and jealous are very hard to almost impossible to be friends with in my opinion. The moment anything in your life is going well they’ll do everything in their power to tear it down and bring you down to their level of misery. It’s as the saying goes: misery keeps company. Those who are miserable want everyone else to be miserable too.

  • @bridgetschlosser9257
    @bridgetschlosser9257 Рік тому +431

    “Losing a friend is like a breakup” thank you! I needed to hear that. I recently lost a friend, and it’s been hard. At one point she was one of my closest friends. I miss her

    • @user-guigui01
      @user-guigui01 Рік тому +14

      Want a "bear hug"? It's one of my best hugs!

    • @aliioana8586
      @aliioana8586 Рік тому +15

      It’s worse than a breakup.

    • @solarisjade2292
      @solarisjade2292 Рік тому +7

      Trust me, it’s hard as hell to deal with, but often times it’s for the better for both of you, especially depending on the circumstances.

    • @jumafaro
      @jumafaro Рік тому +11

      I'd say is worse than a break up, specially if you have been friends for a while. Many times, the feeling of betrayal hits hard. Sometimes, wounds never heal. But we learn to move on.

    • @zukostryder
      @zukostryder 9 місяців тому

      It's literally soooo heartbreaking

  • @NHarts3
    @NHarts3 Рік тому +697

    People need to learn the difference between Inspiration and Imitation 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  • @samanthaholmes5922
    @samanthaholmes5922 Рік тому +497

    Honestly I have a friend who literally kept posting stories I'd written on her social media without credit or anything so she was getting compliments for it. I started posting my stories on Whattpad, she requested a story which is fair enough and I've posted 11 parts of it on my Whattpad. When she eventually checked it out she asked me why she couldn't copy and paste. She just can't seem to grasp the concept of plagiarism.

    • @samanthaholmes5922
      @samanthaholmes5922 Рік тому +64

      @@ava-shi9695 Basically just told her that Whattpad doesn't allow it because of Plagiarism.

    • @vivianrichards1313
      @vivianrichards1313 Рік тому +60

      I hope you've ghosted her since.
      That's one of the scummiest things you can do to a creative person....to plagiarize their work.

    • @samanthaholmes5922
      @samanthaholmes5922 Рік тому +30

      @@vivianrichards1313 Honestly I don't like ghosting people but tbh she hasn't messaged me since anyway.

    • @vivianrichards1313
      @vivianrichards1313 Рік тому +44

      @@samanthaholmes5922 Sounds like she has a case of butthurt over not being able to steal your work anymore.
      I hope you have other friends who enrich your life.

    • @Claudia-lq3ns
      @Claudia-lq3ns Рік тому +8

      ​@@samanthaholmes5922 if you don't want to ghost her, then be upfront and tell her she's being shady and to get her own content. You could also send her the definition of plagiarism. Tool.

  • @elizabethwilson8359
    @elizabethwilson8359 Рік тому +350

    Okay, I think you should start a 'Dear Charlotte' series and give us all some more of that agony aunt style advice 😂

    • @myconfusedmerriment
      @myconfusedmerriment Рік тому +13

      10/10 yes she definitely should. It would basically be the same thing but she’d be helping us sort through OUR drama lol.

    • @elizabethwilson8359
      @elizabethwilson8359 Рік тому +4

      @@myconfusedmerriment exactly! We need her to see this and get on it 😂

    • @OrangeGraffiti
      @OrangeGraffiti Рік тому +5

      Podcast vibes oooh!

    • @jamieevans1387
      @jamieevans1387 10 місяців тому +1

      I was just thinking that

    • @jamieevans1387
      @jamieevans1387 10 місяців тому +2

      That podcast idea is great! I'd absolutely tune in

  • @pam.ferdinand
    @pam.ferdinand Рік тому +123

    The story about Discord is a self-confidence thing. She wants to be involved and feel included, but she doesn't have confidence that she's wanted. There's also the fear of, well, if I invite myself, what if I wasn't wanted? Then people will be thinking the whole time, "Who invited her?" So she's latched on to the one person she feels comfortable with to kind of give her permission to join. She needs reassurance that she's welcome. Then, finding out that things have happened where she wasn't invited just confirms her insecurities and fears that the people in the group don't really want her around or like her. So she's hurt and asks why she wasn't invited, because the answer will hopefully be that it's not because she's not liked but rather because of A, B, C. She also wants all the details about what's happened when she's not there because she wants to feel part of the group. Knowing every little detail makes her feel like an "insider." And she always feels like the outsider who's invited solely out of pity. Clearly, I'm speaking from experience.

    • @lisamartin9831
      @lisamartin9831 Рік тому +20

      Frankly, those two should just talk. That girl should probs have therapy too, she's ruining it for herself :(

    • @anasardinha473
      @anasardinha473 Рік тому +23

      Nah, I'm an "outsider" myself and I ain't lashing out on people, making them feel guilty because of my insecurity. That's bullsh1t. She should own it, get her stuff together, and seriously, grow up.

    • @lisamartin9831
      @lisamartin9831 Рік тому +28

      @@anasardinha473 Not everyone will react the same way or feel the same way about a similar situation. You managing it fine doesn't make her struggle less.
      She has to own it before it comes crashing down on her, yes, but your resoning about it is fucked...

    • @cjustme2.013
      @cjustme2.013 Рік тому +6

      @lisa martin
      Yeah I agree.. the people in her life might not be equipped to help her through her trauma, but a bit of gentleness a long way.

    • @Claudia-lq3ns
      @Claudia-lq3ns Рік тому +16

      Wait...how is it the OP's problem? Even in the beginning she said "both her and her mother knew this is an issue." She needs therapy if she can't function on her own and latches on to someone for her self-worth, etc.

  • @allie2121
    @allie2121 Рік тому +343

    I had a friend who did this to me, our friendship ended after a 5 page email of how terrible a person i was lol. But she did everything in her power to copy me, my career path, my hobbies, taking up ALL of my time.

    • @LazyIRanch
      @LazyIRanch Рік тому +34

      There's a song by British musician Richard Thompson that I think of every time I hear these experiences with "personality thieves" who don't have anything to work with so they try to steal someone else's success.
      *"Hope You Like The New Me":*
      I stole your style, hope you don't mind
      I must try to be all I can be
      It suits me more than it ever suited you
      Hope you like the new me
      And I stole your laugh so bright and breezy
      It stops parties in mid-air
      It makes me feel more devil may care
      Hope you like the new me
      Hope you like the new me
      We all need friends to lean on
      Any time, any place, anywhere
      Feel free to lean on me
      But please, don't do it right now
      Yes, I'm much too busy right now
      And I stole your walk, the one with purpose
      It says there is no mountain I can't climb
      It fools people all of the time
      Hope you like the new me
      And I stole your jokes, just the good ones
      How the gang all laughed with glee
      I also stole the way that you tell them
      Hope you like the new me
      Hope you like the new me
      To steal is to flatter, what a compliment to pay
      All those things that I stole from you
      Well, I might give them back someday
      Yes, I really might someday
      And I stole your wife, hope you don't mind
      She was looking bored, don't you think?
      Soon have her back in the pink
      Stop by and see us for tea
      And I stole your soul when you weren't looking
      I reached inside and cut it free
      It suits me more than it's ever suited you
      Hope you like the new me
      Hope you like the new me
      I've been a fan of his music for over 30 years and know a little about his life. This is absolutely autobiographical! Anyone who has experienced a "friend" like this will see them in this song. The rather ominous tune is perfect.
      ua-cam.com/video/eWmKUau7CVs/v-deo.html

    • @judeinLA.
      @judeinLA. Рік тому +7

      @@LazyIRanch Thank you for sharing this song. ✨🤍✨

    • @judeinLA.
      @judeinLA. Рік тому +1

      So your ex friend was like the new roommate character in the movie *Single White Female*

  • @marieknight9385
    @marieknight9385 Рік тому +138

    The first story was so triggering because I make and design handwoven miniature baskets with patterns I created, and I make jewelry out of them. But people who have similar skills, tend to try and copy it, there’s a certain way that I tighten my weaves that stand out and is unique to my work so whenever I see other imitations I look at how they did it and feel better knowing their work needs way more practice to get to my level. I been weaving for 30 years and started learning very young, so while it’s discouraging it’s also motivational for me to keep making new designs and documentation as a way to track what I’ve made in case anyone tries to claim credit for my work or pass something off as my work. Either way creative people will keep reinventing ourselves and building on those past experiences. And she should sue that “friend” for plagiarism because that revenue she got was due to her copying OP’s work which would also be grounds for theft since she created competition by copying her. Imitation is not flattery especially when in competition with you

    • @MollyHuffle
      @MollyHuffle Рік тому +8

      Weaving is so cool!!! You go! It’s a cool skill!

    • @NHarts3
      @NHarts3 Рік тому +4

      I know a lot of artists try and incorporate a unique signature into their work to avoid plagiarism. I keep thinking of sideserf cakes green icing as an example. I'm sure people will notice your signature weave

    • @marieknight9385
      @marieknight9385 Рік тому +2

      @@NHarts3 in my area most people know my work

    • @lotstodo
      @lotstodo Рік тому +5

      I make nice things and would sell them at fairs sometimes. I had people pick up my stuff and say to a friend, anyone could make this. Maybe, but doubtful.

    • @heatherhogan1114
      @heatherhogan1114 Рік тому +6

      Do you sell your items, do you have an Etsy or something?
      I know what you mean, I'm a crocheter and I hear people tell their friend that look at me stuff "don't buy that from her, I can make you one better than that one and it won't cost you anything" 😠. I keep my cool, look at her and say "Oh... that's nice, how long have you been crocheting?" That itch looked at me and said
      "Uh, I dont, but it can't be that hard to do!" My jaw hit the table and I walked away shaking my head and didn't re appear until they left.

  • @sadrera3593
    @sadrera3593 Рік тому +191

    This last story hit home. I had a girlfriend that always wanted to go out but would cancel last minute. Later she'd be upset that I went without her. If I said I was going to get my nails done then she'd say that it sounded like fun and could she tag along. No worries until she'd be upset that I wasn't paying for her set as well. Stuff like that went on for years. I had recently found a good job that I enjoyed but the hours were from 7p-7a. The days off made up for the weird hours. Before I had this job she would call from time to time and text daily. After I got the job she would call 3x/day and blow up my phone with stupid texts back to back with questions like what does this emoji stand for?....this one?...this one?..... Always on work days and always while I slept. I picked up one afternoon told her to stop and I'd talk to her later. She didn't stop so I turned off my phone. You would've thought I had screwed her over in the worst way! After that she'd start calling and texting while I was at work asking why I didn't have time for her anymore,why I hated her etc....so I called her after work one morning ( waking her up which had her screaming at me for being inconsiderate). I told her firmly that all the calls and texts weren't appreciated while I worked/slept and we'd catch up on my days off. She then started leaving messages saying how since we don't talk anymore she was thinking of hurting herself because now no one cared and she couldn't believe how I had abandoned her. Her mom questioned why I dropped our friendship and we talked a good while ( I hadn't at that point) and she didn't know I had gotten this job or the hours...her daughter told her I had just stopped talking to her. Things came to a head when she had started making snide, truly hateful comments over my husband's suicide and I was done. I didn't realize how stressed out I was around her, talking to her etc.... until I broke away from the "friendship." I have a couple ( literally 2) of close friends. We love and respect each other. Quality over quantity any day. Getting rid of toxic people is a must for your own well being. I'm glad I finally let go. Most peaceful year I've had in a long time!

    • @jarsofpaperstars
      @jarsofpaperstars Рік тому +6

      Honestly I wonder what happened to her afterwards. Either this was a wake-up call for her, or she still lacks the self awareness to see how she self sabotages her own relationships. I get that she’s probably gone through something to get this way, but whatever it is, It’s an explanation, not an excuse. A lot of us deal with hang ups from bad friendships, but at the end of the day we can choose how we interact with others who weren’t involved because/in spite of that. She chose venom with that disgusting comment and I’m glad you’ve moved on with better people.

    • @sadrera3593
      @sadrera3593 Рік тому +7

      @@jarsofpaperstars thanks. We have a mutual friend ( he lives 6 hours away) and he tells me she calls frequently saying she needs a vacation and wants him to pick her up and let her stay at his place for a month or so. ( she has no job and his health is really quite bad.) The last time he let her stay she wouldn't leave and when her mom was asked to come get her all of his prescription meds. and his roommates were in her bags. She's her own worst enemy. He only calls from time to time to check in and blocks her the rest of the time. Her mom continues to give her anything and everything which helps no one. ( We're in our 50's!) She'll really have a helluva wake up call when her mom passes.

    • @jarsofpaperstars
      @jarsofpaperstars Рік тому +1

      @@sadrera3593 Jesus Christ lady I though you were talking about someone in their 20s or 30s! How do you get to over 50 and still act like a child?

    • @sadrera3593
      @sadrera3593 Рік тому +6

      A worn down parent that has given up I'd expect. Otherwise the tantrum that follows would make you choose living in hell rather than with her. I do feel sorry for her though. When her mom passes she's screwed. She has absolutely no clue on how to get by in life.

    • @Claudia-lq3ns
      @Claudia-lq3ns Рік тому

      Yikes! She straight up just sound mentally ill. I hope you told her mother that she threatened to hurt herself. That is some next level manipulation right there. Good for you for cutting her out of your life.

  • @ThePyromania13
    @ThePyromania13 Рік тому +70

    I think that that chick who thought her friend's bf was "too good for her" was actually just jealous as all get-out and was trying to ruin things for op in order to make herself feel better about her own lot. Holy heck girlie, just throw the whole friend away

    • @youknownothingjohnsnow7475
      @youknownothingjohnsnow7475 Рік тому +3

      what i find interesting about all of these stories is that people don't see any reason to hold back while telling OP that they should have dropped the "friend" immediately, and pointing out signs they should have seen and never tolerated.
      yet the same reaction becomes an asshole thing to do, aka "victim blaming", as soon as it's about dating horror stories, "nice guys", etc...
      Both are advices for standing up for themselves, yet the latter is apparently wrong to give.

    • @cosmicrae
      @cosmicrae Рік тому +2

      Why is she forcing her friend to live at her standards?! Dafooq?

    • @Claudia-lq3ns
      @Claudia-lq3ns Рік тому +7

      💯 jealous. Keep her away because she's just trying to muck up something great because she doesn't have it. The whole "he's too good for you" is just her trying to pick at your self-esteem. That ain't no friend.

  • @daniefox8770
    @daniefox8770 Рік тому +90

    I had an ex-friend go through all my hobbies, trying to find one for herself.
    But then would complain she wasn't as good at the things as me, the person who had been doing most of these things since childhood.
    Like, did she think I was playing up how much work I put into my skills?

    • @kylie7780
      @kylie7780 Рік тому +12

      Yes, the problem is they see the final outcome and ignore the years of hard work you've done to get there.
      It's the same with people now who sees UA-camrs/Twitch Streamers and think it's easy because the people they watch "clearly" got views on day one. They didn't see the months of progress that it took for the Artist to even break through to be shown to non-subscribed viewers.

    • @AerynKDesigns
      @AerynKDesigns Рік тому +10

      omg right? the "show me how to do it!" person, and then you show them, and then they cry at you they're not 25 years into a skill instantly and can't do what you do. Like, no, you're starting from square one, you're at square one still. That's not my fault.

    • @truthseeker9249
      @truthseeker9249 Рік тому +5

      And some things are just things you have to have a natural talent for. Yes you have to learn and develop to keep getting better but if you don't have the natural talent, taking lessons and whatnot will only do so much for you (usually not very much). Like singing for example. I have a lot of artistic talents but my biggest one is singing. Sure lots of people can sing and sing on key. But singing-singing means having a style and special sound in your voice. The ability to make a song sound interesting because of having vibrato (Audra McDonald or Emma Thompson) or being able to run (Kelly Clarkson or Jennifer Hudson). Or being able to do both of those. But either you can do those things or you can't. If you can then lessons can tighten it up and make it better as the years go by but if you can't then lessons won't really matter. But luckily for me it's harder for someone to fake being a good singer because if they try to fake it with technology, they'll be exposed as a talentless faker the second they try to sing without a mic or anything else.

    • @mimi8808
      @mimi8808 Рік тому

      @@truthseeker9249 I disagree with you on the singing as a singer myself. Most people would be able to develop those skills with enough pratice and a good coach who will play up their strengths. Not everyone needs to sing the same to be a great singer. It depends on your style and the type of music you want to sing. Case in point most singers never learn how to do fry but any singer that practices the technique can learn fry I.e

    • @truthseeker9249
      @truthseeker9249 Рік тому

      @@mimi8808 no but you have to at least be able to sing on key and give your singing some sort of style and not just sing in a monotone way. If you can't there isn't much a coach can do for you.

  • @camilamoura3651
    @camilamoura3651 Рік тому +73

    Gotta respect the "sponsorship" moment being about your mom's book ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ such a talented family

  • @RotGolem
    @RotGolem Рік тому +38

    Every time the Potato Queen swears in italian, it makes my heart melt. It's one the most heartfelt "vaffa" I could've heard in a while.

  • @danferrusquia2819
    @danferrusquia2819 Рік тому +9

    I actually sympathize with the friend in the last post. I have a disorganized attachment style and a lot of mental health issues so I do sometimes feel like I’m using my best friend as an emotional crutch. I’ve talked to him about this and he says he doesn’t feel used as I’m always there to support him when he needs me, so it’s not completely one-sided. I do often find myself feeling insecure when he spends time with other friends without me, and even though I can’t stop myself from feeling this way, I have started learning to control my thought distortions and establishing my own sense of self independent of any of my friends. My trauma isn’t my fault, but it is my responsibility to not let it poison my relationships

  • @tracylangsley4064
    @tracylangsley4064 Рік тому +134

    I'm so thrilled for your mom Charlotte it sounds like you both are getting to realize your dreams woohoo you go girls 😆

  • @tEclevia33
    @tEclevia33 Рік тому +97

    I had a co worker who wanted to hang out because we had done so a few times before. But around that time my grandma started getting really bad arthritis so I was helping her during my free time. The coworker eventually told me she didn’t think my grandma was that sick and tried to invite herself over. So after that I was like “no thank you”

  • @tatyanamisyulya6081
    @tatyanamisyulya6081 Рік тому +55

    Once had a friend Sarah through half of middle school.. literally got upset at me for smiling at someone else, took me 3 months to get out of it when my eyes finally opened, and thanks to other friends I had at the time who supported me.. her mother even took it out on me because I was one of her only friends and I was apparently the worst person to walk this earth. Still is like this from what I’ve heard.

  • @Spoonie
    @Spoonie Рік тому +6

    The narcissistic friend you we’re describing - there is a term “vulnerable narcissist” which just means they don’t show up like a “typical” narcissist at first but over time, the neediness and always being the victim, they slowly show up as these black holes of insecurity but it’s still because they only see their perspective and constantly need validation. I had such a friend and she never left room for me and my feelings within the friendship, it was so hard to come to this realization that she used me for validation and as a therapist… with zero reciprocation. She thankfully removed herself after a few “missed” calls and she blocked me on her socials… bye Felicia, bye.

  • @cassienoland3934
    @cassienoland3934 Рік тому +147

    We need to normalize removing people from our lives when they clearly have poor or bad intentions to having us in their lives. Sometimes adults don't work out as friends as they mature and continue developing their careers and lives. Stop thinking that everyone always has the best intentions just because you want their intentions to be good. She wasn't ever a true friend. She was a predator waiting for her moment to spring into your life and steal it. You played nice, which is honorable, but you need to recognize that it's perfectly fine to eliminate people like her from your life without it affecting your kindhearted and friendly nature.

    • @DaisyA-04
      @DaisyA-04 Рік тому +3

      Yeah this can be a painful lesson to learn, but you’re right.

    • @JamieM470
      @JamieM470 Рік тому +10

      "She was a predator waiting for her moment to spring into your life and steal it." You cut right to the truth and put it into words perfectly.

    • @duckeh1952
      @duckeh1952 Рік тому +6

      Exactly. While you should be nice and respective of other people, you are also allowed not to be in contact with bad people. Even if they have been your friends or even if they are family.
      It is okay to block people who affect YOUR life in negative way. Idk is this more girl problem, because still so many girls are taught to be quiet, considerate, and polite to a point where they are doormat adults.
      Friendships are pretty much like romantic relationships. Some are only for short while and some last longer. With friendship, you are in phase you grow to be adult you, you both have your own path. So once you reach adulthood, you just simply have grown apart even if you were best buddies thru schoolage.
      I never really had friends so nothing to lose, but I did lose my bff because she (bi) confessed her love for me (straight) and how she had been my friend just because of it. And there I had been thinking I finally found a friend.
      There was no way continue "as friends" thankfully phase in life made it easier to walk away.

    • @myconfusedmerriment
      @myconfusedmerriment Рік тому +1

      This is something I’m dealing with right now. It’s hard, because I want to give people the benefit of the doubt, but it became clear to me pretty quickly that my “friend” is only befriending me for what I can do for her, not because we actually have anything in common. And I will bend over backwards for my true friends, because I know they’d do the same for me, but this is not that kind of person. Life is short, we can’t give our energy to people who don’t have our best interests at heart.

    • @edelleaa
      @edelleaa Рік тому +1

      it's really hard for so many reasons, especially when you are a genuinely nice and caring person... and we usually don't see the full picture until it's all over... the best thing one can do is learn from their mistakes and not let people walk over them. i certainly did after having "friends" in highschool use me, gaslight me, insult me, threaten hurting themselves and more just because in the end they were always jealous. so jealous that she would even ask her boyfriend, that ive met once because she wanted, if he would sleep with me?! and then get mad at ME when he said yes. threaten suicide if i date a guy she used to like in middle school(i immediately broke things off with him), tell a guy that likes me that I said hes not good enough for me and should date her instead and then break up with him 1 day later, randomly tell me i'm "bigger" than someone else (she was always bigger than me) ... and that's just a few of my amazing memories from my "best friend" that "loved" me soo much. it's been almost 10 years and i still can't get over that b*tch and how much she hurt me and made ME feel like the bad guy when i ultimately couldn't take her bs anymore.

  • @isabelamontgomery9182
    @isabelamontgomery9182 Рік тому +251

    Man the stories you read today really hit home. I have a “friend” right now who copies what I do all the time as well as constantly inserting herself into everything I do, monopolizing my time, and asking why she wasn’t invited or included even when she was. There’s been some moments where she was there for me but she holds them over my head like “see what I do for you? I do so much so you should do everything for me”… I’ve been struggling to decide if I should distance myself or not but listening to it happen to someone else really made me rethink things. Yikes! 😅 I think it’s time to create some space…

    • @SharmClucas
      @SharmClucas Рік тому +33

      It's going to be uncomfortable for a bit while things blow up, but once that's over you'll be amazed by how much less stressed you feel and how much more time and energy you have to put into things that you actually care about. Stick to it and put your foot down, you deserve better!

    • @AerynKDesigns
      @AerynKDesigns Рік тому

      free yourself! you don't even have to fight, just get busy, need mental health breaks, and cleanse yourself of this person! you can do it!

    • @arciana
      @arciana Рік тому +21

      You should only be friends with someone if you actually enjoy their company. A friendship should be something positive, something that generally makes your life better. If they just constantly make you feel uncomfortable or paranoid or cause you stress and make your life harder you should just be selfish and do what's best for yourself even if that means excluding that person from your life. It sounds like you're probably better off without them.

    • @jworth7203
      @jworth7203 Рік тому +12

      Be strong. You deserve friends who don’t try to manipulate you. (Which is what she is doing in telling you all she does for you.) Real friends don’t keep score.

    • @snooganslestat2030
      @snooganslestat2030 Рік тому +13

      Giving gifts or helping with the expectation of getting things in return or demanding never ending gratitude is disingenuous & not something to be tolerated.

  • @aurorawold4948
    @aurorawold4948 Рік тому +29

    From a person with borderline personality myself. The mirroring/copying with friends/lovers is common among people with this disorder. Probably because of one of the main symptoms beeing an unclear sense of identity. The strong fear of abandonment that comes with the disorder also often leads to chameleon like behaviour and mirroring in a attempt to be accepted by people we want to get close to (but it does tend to backfire)
    This disorder made me mirror people a lot when I was younger, I have also been in the situation where I have been mirrored by other people in my life and know how irritating and creepy it can be.
    Set boundaries to protect yourself, but know that the other person may not be aware of the fact that they are mirroring.

    • @tf560
      @tf560 Рік тому +6

      Thank you for sharing. After reading this it makes me wonder if my x husband had this as well. He went through life morphing into who ever he was with or what his friends at the time liked. For example, off-roading in jeeps (bought a Jeep Wrangler out of the blue, then left it to rot when he moved on), golf, back packer, dave Mathew’s groupie… so on and so on. He however never knew himself at all. I knew him basically my whole life, and we share 2 kids. So I basically had a front row seat to all of this. Even though we divorced, and he was quite abusive, I felt sorry for him and couldn’t abandon him. The boys kept their distance most of their lives bc of his drinking and erratic behavior, but we always had hope he would change. Sadly he past away, and to this day it hurts knowing he didn’t find himself. He however is in peace.

    • @meisjeViv
      @meisjeViv Рік тому +2

      This is good to keep in mind - does it help if someone points out to you that you're doing this? Or did it when you were not as good as noticing yourself yet?

    • @ayy.ess.1935
      @ayy.ess.1935 Рік тому +2

      I feel bad for you and you're brave for saying this. But an ex best friend of mine was jealous of me and tried to be everything i am. She copied my entire wardrobe, my style, my handwriting even and took all my friends by inserting herself in the group and causing misunderstandings. Even spread rumors around the university about me. Made my life hell.
      Surely you must be suffering from a condition but this shit cannot be normalized since not everyone is innocent. Some people are evil sociopaths.

    • @aliioana8586
      @aliioana8586 Рік тому +2

      @@ayy.ess.1935 yeah no…that ex friend doesn’t sound like someone with BPD. The starting rumors when you’re done with them thing is a classic narcissist discard.

    • @cosmicrae
      @cosmicrae Рік тому +2

      I keep being manipulated when I was younger! I was codependent and was undiagnosed MDD. I also didn't have my sense of identity. Now that I'm well, people hate me for imposing boundaries but that's not my problem. 😂

  • @Anadrien
    @Anadrien Рік тому +12

    I was always the friend that got left out, and I've had to try super hard not to do that kind of stuff to people. But generally it manifests as an inner monologue, not outward action (at least not anymore). But being the kid who got, "let's play house, you're the mom, we're the bad kids!" with her friends left its mark.

  • @paulchappelhymns
    @paulchappelhymns Рік тому +45

    Ordered your Mom's book. I love her writing (I had no idea is your Mom) and can't wait to read the book. Hurray to Ms. Cataneo!

    • @malcolmgray.5913
      @malcolmgray.5913 Рік тому +6

      @Paul Chappel That’s a solid potato flex👍 and a great coincidence.

    • @CharlotteDobre
      @CharlotteDobre  Рік тому +13

      Aw wow thank you so much Paul! I’m sure she will love to hear this!

  • @thetiniestfury4928
    @thetiniestfury4928 Рік тому +78

    I had a friend who told me that my emotionally abusive ex was too attractive to have been with me. Keep in mind that I was 18 when we started dating and he was 27. I was literally talking to her about being young and naive about older men taking advantage and she flat out tells me, "I never understood how you got someone as attractive as he is." Haven't gone out of my way to hang out since and when I do see her she doesn't seem to understand why I never try and get together with her.

    • @vanessazannis5523
      @vanessazannis5523 Рік тому +10

      Horrible! She didn’t hear one word you told her regarding the abuse you sustained during your relationship with this creep. Congratulations for breaking free!!

    • @dave474c
      @dave474c Рік тому +12

      Well done. "When people show you who they are... believe them, as they aren't lying"
      Some people don't learn this until they are quite a bit older.
      It took me too long, I was far too forgiving of some of my so called "friends" when I was in my 20's and early 30's

  • @lidiane824
    @lidiane824 Рік тому +45

    I had a friend since school days and considered her my best friend for a long time, but after college we went to different sides. I would text her once in awhile to tell how much she meant to me, I'm not a sociable person and was weird to text with someone I've seen everyday for years, since I had to be the one reaching out first. She invited me and a other friend to her birthday and even though I'm not used to go out at night, I was the first one to arrive and help her so she could finish dressing up, she was taking fotos later and her mom asked why she didn't call me and that other friend for a foto, she said we didn't liked taking pictures, but we were actually waiting for our turn. Her mom took fotos we us. Weeks later we made plans for movies together and she just forgot to tell me she wasn't going anymore. She did something like forget plans with me a few times, and forgetting my birthday and saying it was my fault cuz I don't like birthdays, it was always my fault, she never apologize and and I accepted til I didn't. Kind of unfollow her on social medias and spend more then a year without interaction and she never reached me. Something like two or three years later out of nowhere she texted me inviting me for her baby shower, she was almost eight months and sent the baby shower gift list like we talked a minute a go. I ignored her. Sometimes I feel guilty, but she never did any effort to keep our friendship, when I think about it I realize that I do have other friends from that time that are my friends till now and we do know stuff about each other. It's painful to let go, but realizing she was never actually my friend it's even worse cuz I valued her.

    • @edgloss1299
      @edgloss1299 Рік тому

      Happened to my friend to.. I arrived early to help her with her B-Day party... But when the party started, she straight up ignored me... And when it's finished, she asked if I could help tidy up... Told her I'm not her slave and left

  • @julied6322
    @julied6322 Рік тому +4

    I love your mom's book so far. I think it's funny how Elise was a "classic beauty, with shoulder-length auburn hair and dazzling brown eyes." Hmmmm, sound like anyone you know? lol! Yay! Go mom!

  • @ryanscott3161
    @ryanscott3161 Рік тому +121

    Just wanted to say thank you, I spent last week in my bed with a chest infection, your videos saw me through, so thank you for being you, from the north east of Scotland x

    • @CharlotteDobre
      @CharlotteDobre  Рік тому +32

      I hope you feel better soon!

    • @davidguidry657
      @davidguidry657 Рік тому +8

      Glad you’re doing better fellow Tater Tot! Greetings from San Antonio TX USA.

    • @downhomesunset
      @downhomesunset Рік тому +3

      As a Scot in Canada 🇨🇦 I wish you well……

  • @LadyGreensleeves33
    @LadyGreensleeves33 Рік тому +21

    I think with that final one, it's one of two things: she's either got MASSIVE social anxiety and/or repressed trauma, OR she's a co-dependent narcissist. Take it from someone who's been, more or less, both parties in this situation. I'm an anxious and very awkward introvert and in high school always stuck by my more extroverted friends/relied on them for social situations. But I've definitely also had experience with possessive, dependent friends who liked to latch onto me and cause a storm of chaos anytime I wanted to hang out with someone else or do something without them. There's hope for the first one, the latter...is a cut and run kind of deal. You can try to make your point, but they will likely just turn it back on you.

  • @solarisjade2292
    @solarisjade2292 Рік тому +12

    For the first story: it is absolutely difficult to let go of that kind of friendship. However, at some point you have to think of yourself, and the effect that that “friend’s” actions have on you. Do NOT allow people to treat you this way, even if you’ve been friends since you were younger. Its not easy to let go of those people, but it needs to be done. I had a hard time losing a long time childhood friend years ago, but we were getting closer to middle and high school and quickly drifting as far as how interests lie. Her actions finally forced me to realize we couldn’t be friends anymore. I shouldn’t have to lie to be friends with someone especially someone who was gonna be terrible to me at the time. Luckily things cooled down in high school (especially towards the last two years) but we still never were as close as we were as kids, it hurt, but that needed to happen.

  • @idasiek
    @idasiek Рік тому +15

    Honestly, I think I have an amazing relationship with my best friend, and one of the reasons is the fact that we have our own lives and our own friends. We see each other few times a week, I'm her kids "auntie", we're both considered family to our respective families, but we also give each other space. I meet some of her good friends maybe once a year for a birthday party, I hear about them all the time, same as she hears about mine, but I'm glad she has them so she can rely on someone while I'm not here or I'm busy doing my own stuff. Also, this makes conversations so much more interesting, as I don't know everything that's happening with her all the time.
    We have a lot of mutual friends obviously, we wouldn't be able to best mates without that, but there's a limit.

  • @sandybrandtmurals
    @sandybrandtmurals Рік тому +109

    Congratulations to your mom!
    My mom had family and friends that did not support her business ideas. Against all odds, she went all in. When the money started rolling in they all wanted a handout.
    She knew someone with kids and a husband that drank and a huge gambling problem. Many times the husband would gamble away the rent and food money. My mom would pay for their rent, groceries and kids clothing.
    A neighbor of that lady found out about this and immediately felt entitled to my moms money too, because she was a single mother of 4 kids and had no job. This busybody would talk garbage about my mom all the time and claimed that my mom was a snake. This lady found out that my mom was making 4 times the minimum weekly wage in one day. My mom offered her 13 year old daughter a job in one of her ice cream trucks after school. The lady would complain instead of being thankful. My mom would pay her more re than minimum wage. This was in the mid 80’s, Downtown Los Ángeles California area.

  • @ladyjustice1474
    @ladyjustice1474 Рік тому +130

    The last story. The needy "friend" is codependent.
    The "too good for you" I can relate, but with a twist. It was my "mother" telling me my "husband" is "too good for you." I come from a toxic "family".

    • @PassTheMarmalade1957
      @PassTheMarmalade1957 Рік тому +40

      "Too good for you" = "You were the person I looked down on to feel better about myself, and now I'm jealous and insecure."

    • @Donna-qt1ot
      @Donna-qt1ot Рік тому +14

      Wow!!! Your Mom should be your biggest fan, your biggest supporter and cheerleader!!!
      I hope you've gone low or no contact until she learns her lesson.

    • @downhomesunset
      @downhomesunset Рік тому +9

      @@Donna-qt1ot toxic families are more common than you may think. My now dead mother had a friend tell all of us that she had died a few years back, just to find out our reactions. She wasn’t pleased.
      I was miserable as a child; mostly thanks to her……

    • @Donna-qt1ot
      @Donna-qt1ot Рік тому +9

      @@downhomesunset , trust me, I know. I ended up in quite a few awful relationships because I was looking for love and acceptance.
      One quick story:. We had a family fast food joint. My mom, sister and I worked the majority. My sister was heinous to my mom. Made fun of her w/customers,was totally disrespectful and just all around mean. My mom would cry about it to me. I got tired of it, called my sister out and there we went. I cry when I get mad and I was furious. Mom then turned it around on me and took my sister's side. Mom just killed any sympathy I had for her that day. I was just defending her and got kicked in the teeth. Our relationship was never the same after that.
      Your mom sounded a lot like mine. I'm so sorry!!!

    • @natsvsam1933
      @natsvsam1933 Рік тому +3

      No no no that is really hurtful your own family goodness. Sorry about that and hope you found a way to distance yourself because they will not stop just because your married

  • @elizabethweigle6146
    @elizabethweigle6146 Рік тому +5

    Damn the last one hits really close to home because I was in that exact situation, but reversed where I was the friend that was kept out of just about everything, and not for lack of trying on my part. I will say that I have struggled with social interaction for my entire life, I’m 22 now, and was recently diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder that affects my social skills.
    For example, when I was in middle school, I found out my group of friends had been going to see movies without me or notifying me and when I asked the “leader” of the group why I hadn’t been invited or even told that these things were going on, she literally looked me in the face and said that I “needed to pay more attention” at lunch, despite the fact that I sat right next to them and also had another group of friends at lunch that sat on my other side, the latter group of friends being a very small group that I only had the lunch hour with.

  • @PorshiaVonne
    @PorshiaVonne Рік тому +1

    “Well it can’t be that hard can it” GIRL!!!! That’s what people say about my music that’s been decades in the making 😂 at least 2. It takes time, dedication, and hard work baby! But I’d love to see you try 🌹

  • @ApochiMikan
    @ApochiMikan Рік тому +167

    I had a friend where we actually both copied each other’s interest/hobbies. When we were young, it was more of a competition type thing. But we grew up and realized we were being stupid. Then it became something where we worked together and built each other up instead of trying to outdo the other. I felt like we were a good team. We could’ve done anything. BUT the friendship started to become codependent on both sides. After a little bit of mild drama amongst our friend group, I myself started to feel left out. I started to be like the girl at the end of this video, but not as bad 😆 It was then that I realized how I was acting and how dependent my friend and I were on each other. I started to distance myself from my friend and that friend group. I would make my own efforts to see them when I had time, but still would spend time with my friend. My friend then got upset with me and asked why I no longer hangout with the group. I explained to her how I was feeling and that I felt like it was a good idea to back away. Our friendship was good. We had our boundaries and were becoming our own people….I thought. I ended up getting a boyfriend and the whole friendship crumbled. There’s a lot of details here, but let’s just say my friend couldn’t handle that I was spending more time with him instead of her. She ultimately made it to the point where I had to choose between her or my boyfriend. I didn’t want to, but after the awful things she yelled at me, the constant insults about my appearance, saying I dress like a sl*t, and saying how awful my boyfriend was when she didn’t hardly know him, I chose my boyfriend. I just felt that it was time we went our separate ways. We went through many ups and downs, but the relationship was no longer healthy. I’m not perfect and I feel a lot of guilt for not doing certain things to try to salvage the relationship, but I feel like ending it was the best option. Sorry it’s long. I needed to get this off my chest 😅

    • @lupe75
      @lupe75 Рік тому +21

      I think some relationships are not meant to be saved. You´ve learnt from it and you´ve grown as a person, just moving on is the best way to go.

    • @jenniferwilliams9548
      @jenniferwilliams9548 Рік тому

      Awwwwee, I'm sorry you carry that guilt with you. Like the other person said, some relationships and people are worth the headache, but others are not. This chic was definitely not someone you want as a friend. NO DECENT PERSON TELLS THEIR FRIEND THEY LOOK LIKE A SLUT !!!! If she is worried about unwanted attention you might get because of your outfit, or whatever there's a way to communicate that without hurting your feelings. I had a friend who barely wore clothes when we went out and I never would say anything to her, others did, strangers would and I'd have her back because that's my girl.

    • @PinksInMyArea
      @PinksInMyArea Рік тому +11

      no cause neither one of my friends has ever insulted me during an argument. We yelled at eachother and stuff like that but NEVER an insult. And mind you we were that type of friends who would call eachother btches and wh*res in a daily basis for fun. I just know that if one of my "friends" deared to call me a slvt with their whole chest and intention to hurt me during an argument i would end that friendship right and there. That's a boundary I'll never let go. Don't feel bad about ending a friendship like that. An insult is an insult and should never come from a partner or a friend. Never.
      edit: I've been with my friend group ever since i was 10, I'm 22 now, and mind you i never got an insult from them not even when we were 12 and dvmb.

    • @VYR15
      @VYR15 Рік тому +3

      Yeah like that what friend insults you for your appearance at least you have beauty in the inside. You made a great choice by choosing your boyfriend 😊

  • @ceciliageroldi5187
    @ceciliageroldi5187 Рік тому +16

    I had a "friend" that did the same thing that the bridezilla in the second story did. She never liked my boyfriend (now husband), for unkown reason, even if he was always super nice with her. Just afther I got married, she invited me for drink, when I arrived to the bar she was there with my ex, saying stuff like:"wouden't it will be nice if you guys reconcile?". HELL NO.

    • @WahidahCherazade
      @WahidahCherazade Рік тому +4

      What?! She invited your ex? Just after you got married to another guy? I can't understand how anyone can believe that's a good idea!

    • @ceciliageroldi5187
      @ceciliageroldi5187 Рік тому

      @@WahidahCherazade She knew what she was doing.

  • @christyjo5126
    @christyjo5126 Рік тому +3

    Char I love ❤ 😍 your channel and I wish I had a friend like you in my life.
    I have learned through the years that a person who doesn't lift you up, stand by you no matter what and not afraid to tell you when your being an ass is NOT your friend.
    On the flip to be a good friend you should be willing to do the same. Being used isn't a good feeling and I love how you tell it like it is. ...

  • @archangel5395
    @archangel5395 Рік тому +1

    I'm crying 😂😂😂 "suck this up for the wedding, eh" 🔥🔥 I can't

  • @eugenedeservesbetter6968
    @eugenedeservesbetter6968 Рік тому +145

    I suffer from ADHD and I thank you, Charlotte for making these videos. It helps me focus more and I get to finish my chores while listening to you on the background.

    • @erikarussell1142
      @erikarussell1142 Рік тому

      SAAAMMMMEEEEE

    • @erikarussell1142
      @erikarussell1142 Рік тому +5

      Plus watching her funny facial reactions. She is so expressive, and I just live for it.

    • @nleem3361
      @nleem3361 Рік тому +5

      Me too. I have adhd and listen at work doing my drawings.

    • @Branwhin
      @Branwhin Рік тому +3

      Oh good GRIEF I hear you Carrie Ly! I've got ADHD too (though my H is mostly of the 'brain won't shut up, space-cadet' variety lol), and music or stuff like this really helps.

    • @alliwoll5178
      @alliwoll5178 Рік тому +4

      I don’t know what is it about her channel but she does an amazing job of keeping an adhd brain entertained and engaged

  • @daisyrachelle4160
    @daisyrachelle4160 Рік тому +36

    So In reference to the last story…the friend that was super sensitive to not being included or involved…I used to be like that and remember how hard is was to be in that mental rut and how hard it was to work my way out of that mental/emotional state. It took a lot of mindset changes and habit changes and emotional work to get out of it. It was really hard being in it and feeling so stuck and helpless and yet still knowing it’s a you problem but you don’t know how to fix it. I’m not saying that the friend isn’t in the wrong for manipulating or using OP just that I’ve been there and I know how hard it is.

  • @emilysage9941
    @emilysage9941 Рік тому +15

    I saw other comments mentioned this too, but wanted to put another vote in for "Sarah's" problem being social anxiety.
    When I was in high school, my anxiety was really bad. I felt like no one cared if I was around, even my friend group. I felt like I was boring or just not enough. Every time they hung out without me, it further solidified to me that I wasn't important to them, that they didn't care or even notice if I wasn't around. It hurt a lot, but it felt like there was nothing I could do. There were times that I would want to talk and socialize with people, but couldn't get my mouth to move. Like I was literally frozen and was just watching myself fade away from these people I wanted so badly to be with.
    Thankfully I felt safe talking to my boyfriend and best friend about it, and explaining to them that I needed their help feeling included in our friend group, because I physically couldn't do it on my own. They were super understanding and made sure I felt included as much as they could, and I'm forever thankful for them.
    I also was able to recognize it as social anxiety, and that's why I was able to ask for help. "Sarah" may not know that there's a word for what she's feeling, so she wouldn't know that there are things that can help her. I get that it seems annoying to the OP of the story, but I just feel bad for Sarah. I remember how much I was hurting, how often I broke down in tears, how lonely I felt all the time. It's really hard, and I hope she gets some help and I hope the people in her life can start to see what's going on with her and treat her with kindness.

  • @zeldapeax8311
    @zeldapeax8311 Рік тому +1

    Girrrrl...you crack me up! When you go all neighborhood with the hand gestures and lingo. Reminds me of back home in Brooklyn. 🤣😆🤣❤️

  • @jordanenogue-ouellette6852
    @jordanenogue-ouellette6852 Рік тому +138

    For the last story, I must admit I relate to this Sarah quite a bit and i don't think it's necessarily narcissism. Could it be insecurity or social anxiety?
    Personally I've always had social anxiety and felt like a burden ever since childhood, with no self-esteem whatsoever; even if I am an introvert and enjoy spending most of my time alone, there's always a point where it gets extremely lonely after a few weeks without talking to anybody, yet I feel like I'm going to annoy anyone I'm talking to if it's not work-related. Whenever I get the rare chance make a friend, they become my beacon of light; I'm not used of having someone take interest in my life or tell me I'm good enough, or have someone laugh at my jokes, so their presence make me feel like I'm worth being alive, and I naturally want to hang out with them as much as humanly possible; they become my favorite person ever and I don't want to share them with anyone else. I'm too shy to make my own place in a social group, so being with my friend makes me feel like I'm not completely out of place, that I'm allowed to say things, and therefore, I end up seeing them as my primary source of confidence and human interaction; I expect them to invite me, to include me in everything they do. If I hear they went somewhere without me and I wasn't invited, it hurts, as it feels like I'm not so good for them anymore; it's like I'm falling back into the "not-good-enough" pit. So I become more clingy, more demanding and in need of more reassurance constantly until the person snaps and cut me out of their life... As they should, honestly.
    Took me therapy to understand I was the one in the wrong every time; that it's not their job to be responsible of my social life, that my main source of self-esteem should always come from me, and that I let myself starve out of human interaction so much that I was incapable of recognizing the other's basic needs. In other words, this kind of behavior was basically just me letting my fears and absence of autonomy rule my life; while you should accept your insecurities exist, and are a problem, you're the only one who have the power to do something about it. Because if you don't, you're truly hurting the other, exactly as you fear. It's a very hard pill to swallow.

    • @Chipmunk194
      @Chipmunk194 Рік тому +31

      I'm so happy you were able to get therapy and grow! I hope you've been able to find friends and be happy 😊

    • @meisjeViv
      @meisjeViv Рік тому +18

      I think it's so cool of you to tell your story here! Glad that you recognise the pattern now. I also hope you have been able to have some more healthy friendships after therapy ❤️

    • @mzdrea9468
      @mzdrea9468 Рік тому +14

      Good on you for doing the work.

    • @sanchopalzar6660
      @sanchopalzar6660 Рік тому +9

      I can relate to this too. exactly how i felt but I'd get into the extremes, either id get clingy or ignore and avoid the person if i felt like they didn't like me anymore. i still get socially anxious but I'm much more comfortable with me. negative reactions don't bother me 80% of the time. im so glad you are doing much better.

    • @monicaavendano5553
      @monicaavendano5553 Рік тому

      I may have a suggestion for all that feel you experienced something like that… it seems to me you may need to consider a mild form of autism and get some profesional envolved to check that. In girls/women can be very tricky to diagnose, but that behavior is a trait, and knowing and understanding this may help you to manage better. Wish you all the best!

  • @ghislainedefeligonde5166
    @ghislainedefeligonde5166 Рік тому +11

    Plugging your mom's book made me grin, you look so proud doing it. I am happy you are happy.
    Common denomonator in todays stories: those people have weird definitions of: "friendship"

  • @eileenalgaze4102
    @eileenalgaze4102 19 днів тому

    Char, I absolutely die at how funny you are. Not the “bafanculo” and the hand gestures 🤣. Thank you for brightening up my days. I go through all your videos every day while I’m working bored off my mind. You make work fun. Much love ❤

  • @vipashibarua6197
    @vipashibarua6197 Рік тому

    you supporting and fan girling for your mom was the BEST PART...WHOLESOME

  • @WeirdSnakeGal
    @WeirdSnakeGal Рік тому +49

    "a little bit narcissistic" more like 100% a narcissist. I could hear someone shouting that word inside my head the whole time Charlotte was reading the story.

  • @princessmae6808
    @princessmae6808 Рік тому +26

    Congratulations to your mom for publishing her first ever novel, so happy for her💗🎊

  • @ninjacoffeebunny4659
    @ninjacoffeebunny4659 Рік тому +3

    Loosing a true friend is the most daycare experience you never had, and yet still 100000000000% worse than any breakup

  • @GoddesssofMind
    @GoddesssofMind 2 місяці тому

    The shout out to your mom was so sweet. Absolutely Adorable. Lovely content!

  • @kiratheusagiisworkshop5266
    @kiratheusagiisworkshop5266 Рік тому +32

    That last story really hits home. I had a friend who was that demanding and had no respect for me. It was always her way or the highway or rather guilt tripping deluxe. If she didn't get her way she would first try to gaslight me and if that didn't work, she down the guilt tripping route and if that didn't work she would get angry with me despite her knowing my PTSD is rooted in people yelling at me, partly and that's as deep as I'll go. She did it anyway until I buckled. Thankfully it was mostly over the internet but once a year we would meet at an event and she would always be clinging to me and follow me around since she didn't really talk to anyone else (or my guess is that no one wants to hang around her) and she would insert herself in my personal space despite me telling her to not do that. I have a very small group that I allow close for hugs and so and she was not one of them since she couldn't even respect me over text. But it really went downhill when she started to treat me like I was her wife and even kissed my shoulder without my consent and that had me spiral down into a depression after a weekend of that and trying to avoid her and a friend eventually had to help me break of any contact with her because she would do her old tactics to get me under her thumb no matter what I said. She gave me space like promised but then she would come back and try to butter talk me so she could get back close but I had enough at that point and told her to never contact me again. Not that it stopped her from trying a few times and when she didn't get what she wanted she tried to bad mouth me and send a nasty email to me (email adress I never gave her too) so even though she haven't contact me in a long time I'm honestly just waiting for her to try again. She's honestly not OK and it's always others fault somethings wrong and never hers. I'm happy I got away from that and I hope OP in the last story gets away too.

    • @isobelgiblin6394
      @isobelgiblin6394 Рік тому +2

      I had a situation similar to this, however she never yelled, she'd run away and when I tried to talk to her she'd get mad, if I decided to wait until she came to me she'd get her friends threaten to beat me up. I'm glad we aren't friends anymore.

    • @kiratheusagiisworkshop5266
      @kiratheusagiisworkshop5266 Рік тому +1

      @@isobelgiblin6394 I don't doubt for a second that if she lived closer she would be banging on my door when she didn't have her way, I honestly think she has a few screws loose 😬

  • @donilexington4600
    @donilexington4600 Рік тому +22

    I had a friend that also would use me as a crutch when it came to social events. They always made me feel guilty about bot inviting them when I went out with other friends. If he wanted to be involved he could have taken initiative, they were his friends too but it somehow ended up being my fault he didn't get invited. "I'm not responsible for your friend group" is the last thing I told him. I hope he's doing better since then. 🤷‍♂️

  • @joualeegrande8263
    @joualeegrande8263 Рік тому +2

    That last post sounds very much like a former close friend too. The last straw was even I became a new mom and she started tripping that I wasn't giving her a ton of time and attention despite the fact that she herself made no effort. Bc somehow she still needed to be the center of attention despite the fact that I had an actual child that should, rightfully, be the center of my attention.

  • @Makjoattack2010
    @Makjoattack2010 Рік тому +1

    I had a "friend" who said she would help me with my small business by helping me set up at events and help me craft the items I sell. I agreed and eventually taught her a little of what I do so she could help me. Well long story short, only a couple months into helping me she eventually ghosted me for events, would never show up, AND decided she was going to open up her own crafting booth doing the same thing I do. She blocked me from seeing her FB page posts and when I confronted her after another friend showed me, she lied and said that wasn't what was going on. She still continues to work the same craft as me. I have since put my anger and betrayal behind me and wish her luck on the hobby I have a passion for that I know she does not. That was long but the best thing to do is stay positive, block them from my life, and keep moving forward.

  • @karenward267
    @karenward267 Рік тому +5

    This person is no friend. She's a plagiarist. Talk with an attorney and see if they can send her a cease and desist letter with the threat for potential litigation.

  • @katieb63
    @katieb63 Рік тому +21

    Wow, your mum's achievement is amazing. As an aspiring writer myself I know how hard it is to finish a novel and I'm incredibly proud of her, despite not knowing her personally. Congratulations Charlotte's mum xx

    • @drapedindiamonds3337
      @drapedindiamonds3337 11 місяців тому

      👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻for Charlotte’s mom and Charlotte doing a cute proud ad was adorable 🥰

  • @GalacticStudios69
    @GalacticStudios69 Рік тому +1

    OMFGGG! I hope your moms book sells a lot! Her family should be so proud!

  • @Jphoenix4ny
    @Jphoenix4ny 19 днів тому

    Why am I addicted to your show? Both of my kids know your channel but did they share it years ago? No! I had to find it on my own…. You are awesome.

  • @moggiepics8548
    @moggiepics8548 Рік тому +51

    I gotta say, that last one hit a bit too close to home 😅 I have been that entitled friend, where you are hyper sensitive to feeling left out. I was left out a lot by friends in school which I think is where it came from. The only way I’ve found to overcome it is to recognise when you start to feel left out and try and view the situation objectively rather than emotionally. Also, try to realise that life is spontaneous and not every little inside joke or event is aimed at making you feel that way.

    • @hsmorg3640
      @hsmorg3640 Рік тому +8

      I actually destroyed my pretty close friendship with 2 people, we were a little trio, because of acting like this.. I regret it so much, but I also know I would likely continue feeling this way in situations.. I think mine stems from losing friendships my whole life, so I feel like a friendship is in danger if I find I wasn't included in something, especially something that was important to someone I care about.. it's hard, but now I don't really hangout with anyone anymore, and I feel like this might be best for me, to avoid ever getting like that again

    • @britneyham7355
      @britneyham7355 Рік тому +5

      I feel this so much. In elementary school, I had two friends and we were a trio of sorts. We were all in this after school system for people whose parents couldn’t pick them up immediately. Anyway, they would have these things called “alone days” when they would just spend the day together and I would be on my own. I never had an alone day with either of them, it was just me always being excluded. I would literally play by myself or sit by myself for 1 to 2 hours. This would happen at least once a week. It really damaged me socially and emotionally. I find it really hard to hold friends and am socially awkward. I always think that no one wants to be around me and am just a burden that they want to be away from (in a sort of alone day). I’m hyperaware to when any of my friends hang out without me and what they are doing. I try not to be but #trauma gets to me.

  • @lucypellek8940
    @lucypellek8940 Рік тому +10

    Also... CONGRATS to your momma on her book. That is amazing! Youre adorable shouting out love and support to her. My mom was my cheerleader, rest her soul. I so wish she was still here to see my coming success but i know she is looking down and smiling. 💜💜💜

  • @stefaniekay8699
    @stefaniekay8699 Рік тому +1

    These people sound SOOOOOO exhausting! So grateful I am in my 50s and all of the “friend drama” is behind me. I have (luckily) 3 best friends and I am very happy with that.

  • @nrivera4380
    @nrivera4380 Рік тому +4

    Congrats to you MOM! Excellent! In regards to the theme of this video, I always said that I attracted the good, the bad and the ugly. It was exhausting and depressing to me to deal with the latter two, and made the decision to rid them from my life. These days it's hard for me to tell who the good people really are and enjoy my introvert self without dealing with humans as much as before.

  • @nina-marie
    @nina-marie Рік тому +10

    As a fellow 🇨🇦 Canadian ... You're Mom is AMAZING !!! I will definitely look into purchasing her book !!! 🎉 Please Congratulate Her !!! 🎉

  • @AmberKelly82
    @AmberKelly82 Рік тому +5

    There can't be THAT friend if you have no friends 😂

  • @karaamundson3964
    @karaamundson3964 4 місяці тому

    That last story really hit me in the feels. My particular frenemy tortured me from 7th grade on (when she moved to where I lived). She always said that everyone hated her, that she wasn't pretty (she was way beyond pretty, even as a kid she was a knockout but she was always glum and crabby), that she didn't have any friends except me (I could name a few, but I think they weren't up to her standards).
    I moved to the second middle school in town for 8th & 9th grade because I was so stressed ALL THE TIME. It didn't really help as she kept calling me and torturing me for all my perceived slights.
    I played an instrument, which I grudgingly chose because I my hands were too small to play bass.
    In between 9th and 10th grade, this frenemy felt driven to learn this instrument so she could play in Orchestra with me and my music friends. It went on and on. She had to tag along when I spent time at my crazy-cool boyfriend's place, tagged along when I went with my mother to an AAUW lecture to listen to an actress I was especially interested in, but was terrified of dogs and large flying insects (abundant where we lived).
    Finally I moved two states away, though I had regrets about the bf.
    Now. It just so happens that my instrument developed quite a bit of a groove reputation, and I made new friends who played electric guitars & bass & drums, + tenor saxophone. Together we had quite a jammy sound, no covers, all originals and listenable as 💩. !
    Naturally, as soon as possible, my frenemy began working to stir up a band of her own and sent links to their songs (go ahead, judge me, I didn't listen to them).
    Only after 25 years did I let my guard down enough to allow her, and her bf, to visit. Our time was to be brief. Nonetheless, she let slip--"accidentally"--that she had been ho'in' around, all those years back, with my then-bf, w whom I was (I thought) pretty darn deeply in love. Those days were bygone, but damn. She threw me under the bus for a lay. ...probably a calculated throw.

  • @susanstohelit3114
    @susanstohelit3114 Рік тому

    Awwwwwwww, so happy for Charlotte's mom! Go, Charlotte's mom!

  • @terra7283
    @terra7283 Рік тому +17

    I feel so blessed with my friends and husband who is my bestie for 25 years. Each over 20 years now with friends. We are not perfect but this kinda crap we never did. What the heck. These people indeed are just me me me. Dump the toxics, real friends care for each other and do not hurt one another. 😌🤗

  • @KateCarew
    @KateCarew Рік тому +10

    Your mom
    I had no idea!! What an amazing inspirational woman!
    Congratulations to her on her segue into being a novelist! She’s such a great mind!
    I love you that much more now! I keep commenting this but you are one of the only creators who I watch EVERY VIDEO from.

  • @federicapapapietro6164
    @federicapapapietro6164 Рік тому

    10:24 as an Italian girl, I was very amused and surprised when you said "Vaffanculo" 🤣😂 ngl, that made my day lol

  • @tashamolly7136
    @tashamolly7136 Рік тому

    I love when Charlotte cusses in Italian hahaha it’s my favourite thing 😅

  • @zuzukris4952
    @zuzukris4952 Рік тому +12

    My husband just came home (an hour ago!) with your moms book, because someone at his work thought I would like it, and I yelled “omg this is Charlotte’s mom!” I’m so excited to read it! Btw, this video is some Single White Female shit! And if you haven’t seen that movie, watch it!! I highly recommend it!

  • @frodoamadeusgobel9749
    @frodoamadeusgobel9749 Рік тому +5

    And this is a moment, where I am happy, to have no close friends.
    Dear Charlotte, you promoting your mum was the sweetest thing! I wish her a ton of luck and readers.

    • @downhomesunset
      @downhomesunset Рік тому

      Isn’t it great when you can count friends on one hand and have leftover fingers?

  • @funkycacahuete2933
    @funkycacahuete2933 10 місяців тому

    Dang that yellow be poppin’ on Charlotte. Charlotte slays in the fall colors

  • @artygirl66
    @artygirl66 Рік тому +14

    Big congrats to your mom! I definitely plan to check out the book :) as for the story about the entitled friend wanting to be invited to every discord call reminds me of a current friend I have whom I'm distancing myself from because of her behavior. It sucks when you're the one stuck dealing with people like that but eventually you gotta put yourself first and realize you're better off without the constant guilt trips

  • @xen0bia
    @xen0bia Рік тому +5

    I kinda had the reverse situation of the "friend that wants to be involved in everything". A while back, I had this friend that would try to involve me in everything they did, and made it sound like they felt "obligated" to do so, even though I NEVER asked for any of it, in fact I was quite annoyed by it. I have no boyfriend and aren't interested in dating whatsoever? She'd try to match me with single guys she knew. I don't have many friends because I'm an introvert and am perfectly happy this way? She'd invite me to her friends gatherings, which generally I felt forced to attend. I don't go out much and don't care to? Lets go out ALL THE TIME! It's like she didn't think my life was interesting enough and so she took it up upon herself to improve it for me, 'cause, you know, she's such a charitable and generous person. I dunno, maybe she had good intentions, but somehow, I don't think this was entirely for my benefit, really. It felt like I was a project, that I needed to be fixed, just so she could say she was behind my now "improved" life. Turns out I don't much appreciate being bossed into things that I don't care for just because they think I should be.

    • @r.brooks5287
      @r.brooks5287 Рік тому

      I relate to this so much. And you're supposed to be sooooo greatful.

  • @ginahartley5822
    @ginahartley5822 Рік тому

    BRAAAA when charlotte throws them words. I heard what you said. 🤣🤣🤣🤣👌👌

  • @susanandrews2294
    @susanandrews2294 Рік тому +1

    It's vids like this that seriously glad that I am now in my mid-50s, and no longer have to deal with this narcissistic bullshit. The majority of my friends are my age or older, and they too no longer have anything to prove to anyone; that, combined with our mutual lack of *ducks* to give about basically anything that would set immature people off, ensures peaceful, happy friendships without fear or needless worrying about competition and petty bs.
    To everyone still yet to see their 5th decade.....if you haven't yet figured it out, get rid of the people who monopolize your time and drain you of energy oh and of course try to steal your ideas. You will be much better off without them.

  • @bayleesmith2803
    @bayleesmith2803 Рік тому +4

    The way your mom and you are getting to experience your dreams is so amazing Charlotte. Congratulations to your mom for her new book!

  • @ilhaamfoster4617
    @ilhaamfoster4617 Рік тому +7

    😂😂 I'm sorry if this is in poor taste but I couldn't help laughing my ass OFF when Charlotte relived a traumatic memory...
    Man why you gotta treat it like I did something wrong 🤷🏻‍♀️😂
    Imma use that one 👍🏻
    And CONGRATS on momma potato's book 📙 💕👍🏻💃🏻🎂

  • @skrrbaby
    @skrrbaby 2 місяці тому

    The shoutout for her mom is so cute I can’t ❤

  • @beth_m
    @beth_m Рік тому

    Reminds me of a WEBTOON called “Eaternal” about a girl that has a gorgeous singing voice and was randomly singing in her friends video background. The friend published it and it looked like the friend was the one singing so the girl singing basically became a ghost singer. The girl was used by her friend

  • @AlexandraUtschig
    @AlexandraUtschig Рік тому +50

    Hearing these stories makes me kind of ok with not really having any close friends. I have had only one close friend as an adult, but I ended the friendship a couple of years ago after realizing how toxic it was. It's lonely sometimes, but these stories make me wonder if it's worth it to even try to make friends.

    • @kenziemayrae3568
      @kenziemayrae3568 Рік тому +5

      ...it is...worth it...

    • @Fragmented_Mask
      @Fragmented_Mask Рік тому +1

      Honestly, these people aren't friends, and this isn't what friendship is. I will never be pyshy if someone is content with their own company, but I wouldn't discount trying because there are some bad people out there. There's so much positivity out there too

    • @xXdreamer4alwaysXx
      @xXdreamer4alwaysXx Рік тому +4

      Everyone needs friends, it can be just a few, but make them GOOD ones. They don’t always click instantly, but can develop over time. Please don’t seclude yourself and think all friends are scum.

    • @AmandaVieiraMamaesouCult
      @AmandaVieiraMamaesouCult Рік тому +2

      Yeah, I'm the same right now. I hope to make a new close friend one day

    • @duckeh1952
      @duckeh1952 Рік тому +3

      I distanced myself from my only friend when I was 19. She was my friend because she wanted to get in my pants and I wasn't interested because we were both girls and I am not into girls (she is bi).
      After that I have just drifted. Made some "friends" while studies but after that life took different directions and I left it be. Friendships have been only superficial because way I was bullied at school taught me not to trust anyone (except professional) with my personal issues and relationships.
      When I was younger it was fine, now as middle aged it's saddening. Unfortunately my place to live and job doesn't even give chance to build anything.

  • @sandy-sagerabbitvintage2681
    @sandy-sagerabbitvintage2681 Рік тому +6

    Bravo to your Mom!!! Wonderful on how proud you are of her own success. My children are the same way with me on my art and it means the world to me. Wish her much success!

  • @DanDann
    @DanDann Рік тому

    I... I cant 😅
    I have been happily enjoying the random photo overlays for weeks here, but the one at 6:41 absolutely took me out 🤣💀😂

  • @foxxpaints360
    @foxxpaints360 Рік тому +11

    The first couple of stories got me wondering if maybe you could cover more copy cat friends or maybe crazy single white female stories lol That last story was hitting pretty close to home for me as well. Thank you for what you do, Charlotte!

  • @dorat.88
    @dorat.88 Рік тому +3

    Oh, the last girl, "Sarah" is my sister. She is extremely jealous of my close relationship with our cousins but she doesn't contact them, ever. Every time I was meeting one of them she wanted to be there. Same with my best friend. My sister says she isn't gonna say anything, she won't listen to our conversation, we don't need to worry, she's just gonna sit at the corner and read or something. Now I live abroad (mostly because of her clinginess, I feel free here) and every time I go home to visit she gets mad that I don't spend every day with her. She is the older one and is 38 btw

  • @Yomamaluvsme69
    @Yomamaluvsme69 Рік тому +2

    I KNOW that this has been said already, but I just love how the editors put CharChar's face on everything. 😭🤣 It's so funny! And they usually pick pics of her making funny faces lol, which makes it even better!

  • @roxannesigurdsson2218
    @roxannesigurdsson2218 Рік тому

    Congratulations to your Mom!!!!!!🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹cant send her a dozen roses so here are some virtual roses. Congratulations Charlotte's Mom!!!!!!

  • @saralandry1926
    @saralandry1926 Рік тому +9

    Great video as always! Also…Congrats on your pilot! I’m so happy you are getting to do what you love.

  • @miyapozo
    @miyapozo Рік тому +4

    Hi, Charlotte! I'm very excited to hear about your mom's novel! I can't afford to support her by buying the book now, but if she ever wants to translate it for portuguese, I'd gladly do it as a gift for her. Your channel has helped me through the biggest depression streak I've ever had, and I'd love to pay it back to you and your family!

  • @MOSESI
    @MOSESI Рік тому

    i like your direction towards helping those in social distress. You are the "Miss Maners" of the 2000's. Well done

  • @alliwoll5178
    @alliwoll5178 Рік тому

    I just have to pop this in since I saw a few comments of people who have ADHD. I myself have ADHD and your channel Charlotte is the only one that I can watch daily and be entertained. I look forward to watching your videos. I may enjoy some channels for a little while but I get bored and just add them to my watch later only to never to watch them. But your channel has never bored my hyperactive brain and I love watching your content. Keep up the great content Charlotte

  • @Asenueh
    @Asenueh Рік тому +8

    I feel like OP could've told "Sarah" that she (OP) was weary of performing all the emotional labor in the relationship and if she wants to continue the friendship, then she needs to put in her fair share of the effort.

    • @mzdrea9468
      @mzdrea9468 Рік тому

      Yessssss. It’s amazing how so many of the AITA things can be solved with a conversation with the other person.

  • @andrealobos1871
    @andrealobos1871 Рік тому +3

    Charlotte, I’m so sorry you have dealt with people like the ones in this video. I did want to say, while others may try to copy you… they can never come close to your creativity, talent and expertise. Keep on rocking it girl! Big fan over here and can’t wait to see what your future holds for you

  • @Scandalnb0825
    @Scandalnb0825 Рік тому

    6:43 omg as you were reading the first story I was like PLAGIARISM!!! 😂😂 I’m so glad the first comment specifically called it out.

  • @SusanIsListening
    @SusanIsListening Рік тому

    Reading through these comments about guilt-tripping reminds me of something my psychologist told me: don't give people this kind of power over you. If you know it's happening, put a stop to it. Push back. Be strong. And if that doesn't work then walk away. People like this ARE NOT your friends.

  • @Sora-wo4oe
    @Sora-wo4oe Рік тому +6

    Hey Charlotte thank you so much for your videos it has been keeping me entertained while I've been in the hospital for almost a year now keep up the good work congratulations to your mother and I'll be looking forward to your new uploads in the future! Keep up the good work potato Queen! 🥔👑