This video speaks my heart. I'm stuck at SAFETY level for 10 years, regarding the fact that I'm gay. I've lived in a constant fear that people would reject me & I tried to cover my gender. In my childhood, I was criticized a lot for my gender, which significantly lowered my self-esteem. I always think I'm not enough, no matter how hard I try, people would find ways to criticize me. This video speaks my heart. Thank you. I'm glad that I find this channel.
Hi, Minh. I'm glad you found my video helpful. You need to build a support system of healthy people who respect you and accept you for who you are. Best wishes on your journey to healing and growth.
Wow, what's the journey. Its exciting in the same time when you knowing yourself and becoming true self. Needs hierarchy looks so simple, anyway it's a process and its true that we can not move forward until our basic needs are not met.
Thanks for the explanation. I'm currently trying to Getting basic needs met. I grew up in an abusive, dysfunctional family system. I still feel used n abused. I'm trying to break away from this.
That's true, in my case I'm stuck on level 3. Grown up in a very dysfunctional family, by an anaffective bipolar and often mean mother, and a narcissist egotistical often violent absent father. Even today, at 40, struggling so much in regards of self esteem and relationships.
@@Serenityonlinetherapy yes, after many years of living unconsciously as a victim I now understand more, but the problem is that, in the same unconscious way, I always try to get that unconditional love and affection I didn't receive, which only a mother can give. I realized that in romantic relationships that doesn't exist, but at the same time I feel tht I cannot help but try to symbolically win that "game" I lost as a child. Thank you very much for your very good educational content by the way.
@@_creative360 Check our this video on reparenting your wounded child. It might give you direction for resolving your dilemma. ua-cam.com/video/LfRnGuqaIRU/v-deo.html
i could,t remember my childhood, it was that bad, now i have just a picture of me little and extremely sad, and traying to reach a hands to pick me up, but i was never picked up and hugged.... i could cry.... for hours... with that image in my head... i was all my life ascapegoat, guilty for every single thing... so painfull, i was not alowed to laught, to cry... my sister and brother werw taking care of beter than me...
Well done! Im going to guess that a large percentage of the world's people can never be self actualized through no fault of their own. Who is it, that talks about life stages, and say "this vs that"? Its similar.
I have been trying to meet my safety need for the last 8 months now and I'm just so tired from it, I really wish to be finally able to move to fulfilling the other needs soon 😪 you're right, having not met the fundamental needs it makes it so much more difficult to reach out the others. And perhaps explains why I have no intentions to date now
Also, Carl, could that be a reason why I don't feel motivated to cultivate my interests and passions? Because I don't have my safety need met and that's where I'm stuck at?
Good question! It really depends on the individual and his or her situation. Severe addicts are most likely struggling with the most basic needs but since they numb themselves to life, they might not even care or realize it.
Ok, so as a wife, in a loving wonderful relationship, ni dropped into widowhood, where do u stand on your pyramid. Back at the complete bottom. Where is the help, kindness, awareness of what Widows go through. No where. No one understands unless they are with us. Did your spouse die? You can not even begin to know what we go through. We had our perfection sometimes. I know I did. I would love to be able to give true daily help to widows. We do not even want to get out of bed let alone function, take care of others. The pain is worse than a heroin addiction!!
Hi, Kitty. I am so sorry for the tragic loss of your husband. Yes, traumatic loss can take you into survival mode. May I suggest that you watch some of my videos on grieving: ua-cam.com/play/PL_wjG-62KkuuQpQbo1wo-Vm22kQLase3G.html
Hello, I've been watching your channel for quite a while. You have very useful videos, but your website looks pretty bad. Have you ever considered updating it?
This video speaks my heart. I'm stuck at SAFETY level for 10 years, regarding the fact that I'm gay. I've lived in a constant fear that people would reject me & I tried to cover my gender. In my childhood, I was criticized a lot for my gender, which significantly lowered my self-esteem. I always think I'm not enough, no matter how hard I try, people would find ways to criticize me. This video speaks my heart. Thank you. I'm glad that I find this channel.
Hi, Minh. I'm glad you found my video helpful. You need to build a support system of healthy people who respect you and accept you for who you are. Best wishes on your journey to healing and growth.
Wow, what's the journey. Its exciting in the same time when you knowing yourself and becoming true self. Needs hierarchy looks so simple, anyway it's a process and its true that we can not move forward until our basic needs are not met.
Thanks for the explanation. I'm currently trying to Getting basic needs met. I grew up in an abusive, dysfunctional family system. I still feel used n abused. I'm trying to break away from this.
Thanks for sharing. Best wishes on your journey to healing and recovery.
@@Serenityonlinetherapy No, thank you. 😊
StarlightnDust same here, and it's not easy
Thanks Counselor Carl. 💙💫✨
That's true, in my case I'm stuck on level 3. Grown up in a very dysfunctional family, by an anaffective bipolar and often mean mother, and a narcissist egotistical often violent absent father. Even today, at 40, struggling so much in regards of self esteem and relationships.
Now you know why and hopefully haves some clues as to how to begin to meet those needs as an adult. Best wishes!
@@Serenityonlinetherapy yes, after many years of living unconsciously as a victim I now understand more, but the problem is that, in the same unconscious way, I always try to get that unconditional love and affection I didn't receive, which only a mother can give. I realized that in romantic relationships that doesn't exist, but at the same time I feel tht I cannot help but try to symbolically win that "game" I lost as a child. Thank you very much for your very good educational content by the way.
@@_creative360 Check our this video on reparenting your wounded child. It might give you direction for resolving your dilemma. ua-cam.com/video/LfRnGuqaIRU/v-deo.html
Thank you sir. I'm very appreciative of your videos. Many blessings to you.😊🙏
Thank you, and you're welcome!
THANK you Counselor Carl!!!😊❣️❣️God Bless good day’
You're welcome, and thank you, Mike!
i could,t remember my childhood, it was that bad, now i have just a picture of me little and extremely sad, and traying to reach a hands to pick me up, but i was never picked up and hugged.... i could cry.... for hours... with that image in my head... i was all my life ascapegoat, guilty for every single thing... so painfull, i was not alowed to laught, to cry... my sister and brother werw taking care of beter than me...
Well done! Im going to guess that a large percentage of the world's people can never be self actualized through no fault of their own. Who is it, that talks about life stages, and say "this vs that"? Its similar.
Erik Erikson. I have a video about his Eight Stages of Man, too. Here is the link: ua-cam.com/video/u23tUyagjyc/v-deo.html
I have been trying to meet my safety need for the last 8 months now and I'm just so tired from it, I really wish to be finally able to move to fulfilling the other needs soon 😪 you're right, having not met the fundamental needs it makes it so much more difficult to reach out the others. And perhaps explains why I have no intentions to date now
Also, Carl, could that be a reason why I don't feel motivated to cultivate my interests and passions? Because I don't have my safety need met and that's where I'm stuck at?
Yes, basic needs take priority, which when met free up energy and concentration for higher needs. Best wishes!
Counselor Carl thanks :) I'm trying to rebuild my life from the bottom again.
@@marketa7752 It is something you can do, and self- care must be your guiding light.
Counselor Carl thank you 😊
When folks rely on alcohol, where are they stuck? The bottom?
Good question! It really depends on the individual and his or her situation. Severe addicts are most likely struggling with the most basic needs but since they numb themselves to life, they might not even care or realize it.
Counselor Carl ,Thanks, yes they usually dont care.
1:18 physiological need to have 'sex' missed?
That was not included as a Physiological need by Maslow, and I agree. I think that is more involved with Love and Belonging needs.
I lost my dog a week ago I’m so sad and this is the first time losing anyone
I'm sorry for the loss of your beloved dog.
I’ve been looking for someone I could talk to about it do you think I could talk to my school councillor about it
@@evinerickson3427 Absolutely! You can talk with a school counselor, a religious leader if you have one, a trusted friend or relative, or your doctor.
Ok, so as a wife, in a loving wonderful relationship, ni dropped into widowhood, where do u stand on your pyramid. Back at the complete bottom. Where is the help, kindness, awareness of what Widows go through. No where. No one understands unless they are with us. Did your spouse die? You can not even begin to know what we go through. We had our perfection sometimes. I know I did. I would love to be able to give true daily help to widows. We do not even want to get out of bed let alone function, take care of others. The pain is worse than a heroin addiction!!
Hi, Kitty. I am so sorry for the tragic loss of your husband. Yes, traumatic loss can take you into survival mode. May I suggest that you watch some of my videos on grieving: ua-cam.com/play/PL_wjG-62KkuuQpQbo1wo-Vm22kQLase3G.html
Hello, I've been watching your channel for quite a while. You have very useful videos, but your website looks pretty bad. Have you ever considered updating it?
Not really. It serves its purpose, but since I started doing videos, my focus is mainly on creating videos.