Kids: A Right? A Curse? or a Gift?

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  • Опубліковано 18 січ 2022
  • For probably the first time in human history, the common perception of children as a gift has been under attack by our culture at large. More and more the world sees kids as an affront to our personal autonomy or the driver of a pending apocalyptic catastrophe.
    Today, Fr. Mike weighs in on the "primary goods" of marriage and why we need to re-orient our mindset when it comes to children.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 432

  • @BlindFaith777
    @BlindFaith777 2 роки тому +273

    My dad made no secret from my earliest ability to remember that he did not want me. I was the 4th girl for my parents. My dad wanted to adopt a boy after my sister (3rd girl) was born. My mom became pregnant with me on their anniversary celebration. My dad told her he’d have nothing to do with me if I didn’t come out as a boy. Surprise! I wasn’t a boy.
    I remember at age 18, I asked my dad: “now that you’ve had a chance to get to know me and who I am are you now glad that I am not a boy?” He responded “no@ w/o hesitation. :(
    Funny, I grew up knowing this fact (that I wasn’t wanted) so it really doesn’t hurt to talk about it. It’s just was what it was, is what it is. I’ve had people (counselors) tell me it should hurt me. I think it’s sad that he missed out on knowing me and experiencing what I offer this world and the people I come in contact with. I think it’s sad that I cannot relate to anyone that has a close relationship with their father, but I simply just see it as something I cannot change. As a result, I pour my love into my daughter and make sure she knows how much she was and is wanted . She knows I prayed to God for her from the time I was a small child.

    • @IONov990
      @IONov990 2 роки тому +28

      Oh God. I'm sorry

    • @jfer5622
      @jfer5622 2 роки тому +75

      I am glad God made you with the strength of a pillar...to be able to overcome that situation and know it is caused by his selfishness and not you as a child/person. You know who you are and most importantly, what you have to offer to others. No doubt in my mind, YOU are a gift from God!

    • @Adammmmuuuwee11
      @Adammmmuuuwee11 2 роки тому +18

      That's heartbreaking. I'd love anyone.

    • @VintageCardinal
      @VintageCardinal 2 роки тому +27

      So heartbreaking. God made you wonderful just how you are. That's his self-esteem issue, not yours. :

    • @imgvillasrc1608
      @imgvillasrc1608 2 роки тому +5

      @@VintageCardinal This. The most sensitive ones tend to be the pickiest.

  • @jacquelinejacobson6789
    @jacquelinejacobson6789 2 роки тому +105

    Please pray for my daughter Kara. She is 8 weeks pregnant, married, and suffering from extreme depression and anxiety. She wants an abortion. I've provided her with support and a pro life clinic to contact. She needs psychological help and her doctors don't realize the severity of her depression

    • @Adammmmuuuwee11
      @Adammmmuuuwee11 2 роки тому +14

      I'm praying

    • @ysi4607
      @ysi4607 2 роки тому +11

      Praying! Hope that she hangs on.. an abortion can cause deeper depression. St. Dymphna, pray for Kara..

    • @EverydayCanBeASunday
      @EverydayCanBeASunday 2 роки тому +15

      Mary, Undoer of Knots, pray for dear Kara.

    • @lelavelion1356
      @lelavelion1356 2 роки тому +12

      Saint Rita and St. Philomena intercede for Kara🙏

    • @piggylicous1
      @piggylicous1 2 роки тому +8

      I’m sorry. I will pray for her, the baby and you.

  • @pop6997
    @pop6997 2 роки тому +214

    Father, celibacy is a gift too - I'm glad you took it and now have a flock of your own :) You are using your gifts like the parable of the talents. Thank God, and may He bless you always.

    • @robynbeach3198
      @robynbeach3198 2 роки тому +7

      I was actually wondering if not having that need to hold the baby was part of the celibacy gift. Maybe it makes it easier to be chaste? Just a thought...

    • @pop6997
      @pop6997 2 роки тому +6

      I think the gift of celibacy is sometimes huffed at by people who don't really believe that warriors exist...especially with a collar!
      Real men are warriors. My Husband is a trainer, and I love him so much, this is our path. However, true warrior priests are the salt of the earth. No doubt about it, and they condemn nobody just speak truth and wisdom...and their heart touches people.

    • @pop6997
      @pop6997 2 роки тому +1

      @@romaingilles5631 There are amazing French Saints that are celebrated all over the earth.
      People are 'named' after them, myself included...
      Start there...God Bless!

    • @learnbibleversethroughpict6027
      @learnbibleversethroughpict6027 2 роки тому +2

      Amen🙏

  • @RJ-oh1wr
    @RJ-oh1wr 2 роки тому +135

    Father Mike stays true to Catholic teaching and isn’t afraid to have difficult conversations. It’s incredible that someone can speak so much truth on controversial topics, but remain patient and kind. He’s inspired me to stop ignoring the daily call I feel to be more involved and dedicated to my faith.

    • @user-mo2pz8ld5e
      @user-mo2pz8ld5e 2 роки тому +4

      Exactly. It reqires pure courage

    • @lancesmith889
      @lancesmith889 2 роки тому +2

      Father Mike is a rock-star

    • @tinag7506
      @tinag7506 2 роки тому +1

      The patience part really is a surprise in this era of being super sensitive and volatile.

  • @pocahontasthegreat
    @pocahontasthegreat 2 роки тому +38

    I am 12 weeks pregnant and am still struggling to accept it. I am married but don’t feel ready for children. I am not ready to give up my freedom and wish this could be at a different time. I am struggling to see this as a gift. Please pray for me. I feel like a horrible mom saying this but I am so frustrated and angry that this happened. I need prayers 🤍

    • @marystenson2852
      @marystenson2852 2 роки тому +5

      I will pray for you, don’t worry, no one is ever fully ready. Trust in the Lord, get support, read books about pregnancy and baby care.Your energy levels and wellness are probably not great at this stage. You will soon bloom, joy and wonder will soon arrive. May God bless you on this adventure ❤️🌍🙏

    • @pocahontasthegreat
      @pocahontasthegreat 2 роки тому

      @@marystenson2852 Thank you so much🙏

    • @stutterstudios4731
      @stutterstudios4731 2 роки тому +2

      Aye no judgement! Life is difficult, just try to lean on the Lord for help and pour out your heart to him. We are sick patients, God is the doctor that gives us medicine we don’t want. He does that to me at least; i gotta trust🙏🏼💙

    • @grumpycrumbles7360
      @grumpycrumbles7360 Рік тому +2

      I'm late to the party, but I hope everything went well! Blessings 🕊

    • @Mrsjones028
      @Mrsjones028 Рік тому

      No mom is ever ready and you never will be. You will get everything wrong all of the time except for those odd days and moments where you just NAIL IT! Hang on to that moment and know they will be just fine if you put in the effort it is the hardest job in the world. And give it all up to GOD! I hope you and your almost 2 years old are doing great! Keep them out of the public school is the best advice I can give. And keep them home as long as possible.

  • @areacode3816
    @areacode3816 2 роки тому +56

    For most of my life all I wanted was a family of my own. It never came and for a long time I felt very alone, shunned, and hurt. After my mom passed God opened my eyes to a new way of life. To help those who are hurting. In doing so God is giving me a family. No kids, no wife but those who are close to me. It is not the gift I first wanted but one that was needed.

    • @lawrencegatti8283
      @lawrencegatti8283 2 роки тому +7

      Yes. I relate. I've realized our gifts are not ours to choose, they are chosen for us.

    • @chembiz
      @chembiz 2 роки тому +1

      I've been in a similar place and I'm coming to grips with I may be single and never have kids of my own. God bless you!

  • @meahr4654
    @meahr4654 2 роки тому +19

    My son ask "am i a mistake?" (We had him outside marriage...my greatest sin to God and to my parents) but i always answer him, no anak, you are a gift from God.

  • @rebeccalynn3986
    @rebeccalynn3986 2 роки тому +69

    On my Mary consecration day, I got pregnant unexpectedly at 36. It was never our plan, but now I can’t imagine not having this 4th child (about to be born). Children are gifts from God ❤️. Precious gems

    • @ridley_boi8272
      @ridley_boi8272 2 роки тому +3

      That's awesome, God bless you!

    • @alanweber6805
      @alanweber6805 2 роки тому +2

      I thank you for your message it really helped me amen

  • @Littlemermaid17
    @Littlemermaid17 2 роки тому +74

    Well said Father Mike. Especially the hard part about how children aren’t ‘rights’. Today’s society simply doesn’t understand this.

  • @colleenlongua9752
    @colleenlongua9752 2 роки тому +89

    The same applies to vocations. No one has a right to a spouse or to be a nun or a priest or whatever vocation we feel called to. If we obsess over getting one thing, we miss all the other gifts that God gives.

    • @lukemicsky3086
      @lukemicsky3086 2 роки тому +11

      I'm glad I read this; I'm a college freshman and have been wanting a godly woman in my life for a while now but especially now that I feel like I've matured enough to handle a committed relationship, but if I keep focusing on not having that right now, I miss out on the other friendships and opportunities God has given me. If I'm meant to take a woman as my spouse, I'm sure that in my seeking I will eventually find. 🙂

  • @vrcarlos6955
    @vrcarlos6955 2 роки тому +37

    Every child is a gift. Amen. This affirms the dignity of each person.

  • @uncleRek
    @uncleRek 2 роки тому +71

    Fr. Mike is just the right person to deliver important painful messages. As he has done many times.

    • @EverydayCanBeASunday
      @EverydayCanBeASunday 2 роки тому +1

      I totally agree!

    • @enshala6401
      @enshala6401 2 роки тому +4

      Yeah, pain received. Children aren't a curse, but being barren most definitely is. I know kids are not a right, because God doesn't owe us anything. But being married, barren, and being told that a childless marriage is not meeting the primary purpose of marriage is... heartbreaking. Important, painful message received.

    • @learnbibleversethroughpict6027
      @learnbibleversethroughpict6027 2 роки тому +2

      @@enshala6401 😞👍🏾

    • @enshala6401
      @enshala6401 2 роки тому

      @@learnbibleversethroughpict6027 Thanks for the well-wishes, friend. Some days are harder than others, but God has blessed me in so many ways, that I just need to grow in humility to handle my situation. People like you, who express empathy, make a world of difference. Thanks for what you do. Please keep it up. Inspired by your help, I will try to pay it forward.

    • @0329Christine
      @0329Christine 2 роки тому

      Enjoy your life.

  • @TygerByte
    @TygerByte 2 роки тому +33

    This is the message my wife and I needed to hear right now struggling with not receiving the gift. Thank you for your ministry Fr. Mike.

  • @donnasiracusa4700
    @donnasiracusa4700 2 роки тому +21

    Some people see a child is a rite to adulthood regardless how you treat them or raise them. However, children are a gift and are not a burden if you raise them to work together as a unit not as if everything is centered around them.

  • @uteme
    @uteme 2 роки тому +66

    Children when wanted, loved & cherished are SUCH A BLESSING - a gift! That's why it truly is important what we do with our bodies...abstinence not abortion.

    • @claudiap.6838
      @claudiap.6838 2 роки тому +29

      Even kids NOT wanted are a blessing.

    • @lovelast4evergemma508
      @lovelast4evergemma508 2 роки тому +8

      @@claudiap.6838 Amen❤️🙏❤️

    • @erint6540
      @erint6540 2 роки тому +4

      I would gladly adopt someone's unwanted gift. We have 2 living children and 6 that did not make it, and we long for more.

    • @THEsweetlil16
      @THEsweetlil16 2 роки тому +3

      “Don’t confuse a gift with the Giver (God)”. I just heared that from another priest.

    • @josephzammit8483
      @josephzammit8483 2 роки тому +1

      ua-cam.com/video/THV_u-ZlmRc/v-deo.html

  • @ashleyjones6888
    @ashleyjones6888 2 роки тому +12

    Yes, children are gifts. I think part of what makes it so hard for those who struggle to have children is that they are shamed by other Christians who make assumptions. I can't imagine how painful it is to see Christians loudly proclaiming that believers absolutely have to have many children in order to obey and glorify God, when you CAN'T.

  • @JoshJimenez_
    @JoshJimenez_ 2 роки тому +8

    Everyone is a gift. God Bless all the Pregnant Women right now, may they have safe and healthy deliveries. 🙏

  • @lidette711
    @lidette711 2 роки тому +15

    I'm scared of holding other people's babies because I might hurt them or get them sick. Anyway... I was asked once to hold a friend's baby so she could go to the bathroom. I was surprised by the baby's weight! I thought he'd be light 'cause he was so small--but no! That kid was heavy! And I was astounded by the kid's mom' cause he holds him for hours! Shout out to all the Moms out there. Y'all are amazing. 🤩

    • @amandascheerbaum5883
      @amandascheerbaum5883 2 роки тому +1

      I have 3 kids and am astounded at how much muscle mass a baby can wear. It’s like they’re made of lead! 😂

  • @kathyalex778
    @kathyalex778 2 роки тому +9

    I am 19 and am so looking forward to being a stay at home wife with kids one day, teaching the young ones about conservative family values and God. I love my life right now, but I feel such joy thinking about having my own family unit one day with a wonderful man.

  • @mmjanemorgan4252
    @mmjanemorgan4252 2 роки тому +26

    I love newborn babies! They are so cuddly. I prefer newborns. When they get older, I'll give them to you, Fr. Mike! ❤❤

    • @violinda.
      @violinda. 2 роки тому +4

      Right? The smell of newborns... 🥰

  • @lovelast4evergemma508
    @lovelast4evergemma508 2 роки тому +10

    All children are a GIFT Always ✝️🎁💝🌹🕊️yet, not all children are Treasured as a GIFT and this pains me beyond expression.
    THANK YOU Father Mike💜✝️💜GOD Bless and Keep You Always💝

  • @johns1834
    @johns1834 2 роки тому +35

    In a previous marriage, natural methods were not working and my wife wanted children so much that she/we spent over $90,000 for various IVF procedures because she felt it was her "right" to have children. All attempts failed and it was just not destined to be. It was a rough time for both of us. Thy will be done.

    • @eg4848
      @eg4848 2 роки тому +5

      wow so much money. Could have been used for charity or so many other things... also IVF destroys fertilized eggs. sorry for the blunt comment

    • @johns1834
      @johns1834 2 роки тому +6

      @@eg4848 Yep, exactly. I kind of had hopes of paying off our home instead. But have since moved on to a much better life.

    • @user-cl6uj5bn2f
      @user-cl6uj5bn2f 2 роки тому +3

      @@eg4848 Don't be rude. A child's life is worth that money if someone really wants a child. Don't judge this person for sharing something so painful.

    • @user-cl6uj5bn2f
      @user-cl6uj5bn2f 2 роки тому +1

      Sending love to you and hoping you and your former wife found healing in this journey.

    • @johns1834
      @johns1834 2 роки тому +2

      @@user-cl6uj5bn2f Yes, we have both moved on and found healing. And have since learned the Catholic Church is very much opposed to IVF. I look back and realize God was watching out for both of us.

  • @elizabethhunter4525
    @elizabethhunter4525 2 роки тому +19

    Could not agree more, I try not to dwell on what could have been, just try to be grateful for the blessings I do receive daily. You have a wonderful gift of speaking the hard truth sometimes in such a non confrontational manner.

    • @IONov990
      @IONov990 2 роки тому

      I hate the difficult truths.

  • @danielfortier2629
    @danielfortier2629 2 роки тому +37

    I'm a father and my favourite time in a baby's life is between newborn and six months. Those months are magical for me!
    Somewhat like Father Mike, I don't like other people's babies. I did like them before I had my own. But once I became a father I lost all interest in other people's babies.

    • @theclapaolini4322
      @theclapaolini4322 2 роки тому +2

      Yes they are GIFTS REAL GIFTS FROM GOD TO THE MARRIED COUPLE.CALL YOUR SELF BLESSED BECAUSE PEOPLE WHO WANT CHILDREN AND ARE UNABLE SUFFER A LOT.
      MOTHERS BE HAPPY AND PROUD IF YOU HAVE CHILDREN.
      GOD WILL PROVIDE FOR EVERY CHILD. NEVER WORRY. GOD IS IN CHARGE OF EVERYTHING. HE ALWAYS WAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE. GOD. NO THER

    • @danielfortier2629
      @danielfortier2629 2 роки тому +7

      @@theclapaolini4322 I have a severely mentally handicapped son, now 38 years old still living at home. When he was younger and I would be discouraged my mom would remind me we had him because God loved us. I used to joke that I wished God loved me less. 😂

  • @tiffanyflirt8216
    @tiffanyflirt8216 2 роки тому +6

    When I choose to hold a baby I feel it’s a soul bond to care for that child. I feel we forget how special that really is. It’s a special connection that is only shared with someone special.

  • @angelacross2216
    @angelacross2216 2 роки тому +17

    Newborn babies are not meant to be handed around. Your instincts are correct.

  • @teregibbs6949
    @teregibbs6949 2 роки тому +9

    Fr. Mike, thank you for all the wisdom from God through your words! You are a gift for all of us and we are truly grateful for that! God bless!

  • @HelenRox98
    @HelenRox98 2 роки тому +12

    Thank you for always speaking the truth, Father Mike!❤️👏🏻 It’s hard to talk about this with people so I appreciate you doing it. You’re in my prayers!

  • @amandascheerbaum5883
    @amandascheerbaum5883 2 роки тому +4

    I applaud your honesty about not wanting to hold babies! I’ve known other folks who also don’t yearn for holding a baby for different reasons! 🥰 Each life and each vocation and state and stage of life is such a gift.

  • @bridgetkelly2490
    @bridgetkelly2490 2 роки тому +4

    Needed to hear this. Children are always a blessing so it’s hard not to feel like it’s a bad thing when you want them and are open to it but you’re not blessed with them. God’s plan is always better.

  • @Neon29651
    @Neon29651 2 роки тому +11

    My wife is expecting , and is due in late August. We are so very excited! Such a gift .

  • @strawberrysmile2212
    @strawberrysmile2212 2 роки тому +5

    I love to hold newborn baby's! I wish I could spend the whole day surrounded with newborns and just hold and cuddle them and tell them how sweet and what a blessing they are! Once I spend my work experience on a newborn station in Hospital and felt like in heaven ❤️😇

  • @madams.5976
    @madams.5976 2 роки тому +6

    Thanks for the message. My original message was a mini series, but thought, What’s the point. My husband and I are childless. He was in his mid 50’s and felt too old too raise a child. I was older as well, nearly 40. But I’m still sad we never had a child. I’m not sorry I got married though, my life with my husband. It’s been a gift as well and a joy. I pray the good Lord will forgive us and continue to bless us. God knows what he’s doing.

  • @Kpachm
    @Kpachm 2 роки тому +4

    Thank you for this video. My husband and I have been trying for a second child for some time and my prayer each month we find out we aren’t giving my son a sibling has been “Lord, thank you for knowing what I need better than I do. I am sad. I want this so badly, but I trust in your wisdom. Thank you for taking care of us.” Sometimes I don’t feel it until after I’ve said the words but it does give some peace to say this prayer.

  • @cheche1104
    @cheche1104 2 роки тому +7

    the greatest gift i received is my daughter and i love her soo much ❤️❤️❤️

  • @kathiasoto2355
    @kathiasoto2355 2 роки тому +3

    I am looking forward to hearing you speak tomorrow at the March For Life Father Mike 🙂

  • @nataliaesquivel832
    @nataliaesquivel832 2 роки тому +4

    This is a good talk Fr Mike. I always knew children are a gift and not a right even before I was pregnant for a short time recently with our first child. Our baby was a gift a true gift from God. And when I miscarried it was unexpected and came fast I learned to be even more grateful to have been able to have hold life inside me even though it for a short time.

  • @bbureau12
    @bbureau12 2 роки тому +16

    Having children should be a calling one seriously discerns; just like the priesthood. As a youth counsellor at a women's shelter, I saw so many parents who saw them as dolls they could dress up and accessorize to go with their outfits, or ways to get money from the state or hook a guy, or these entities that would unconditionally love them in ways their parents maybe hadn't. Almost all of those parents were inevitably disappointed when they discovered that children are their own entities with their own needs and goals. Babies cry and spit up and keep you awake at night. Children act out and rebel. These parents became jaded and in time, at best, saw their kids as baggage to be dragged along. At worst, they saw them as burdens (I had more than one say they hated children right in front of their child.) This starts a vicious cycle, as the kids learn from their parents. Teaching kids early on that children are both a responsibility and a joy, and something you should discern seriously, would have helped break these cycles and get people out of poverty.

  • @michelleferrao8888
    @michelleferrao8888 2 роки тому +2

    Thank you Fr Mike 🌟
    Every single child is a gift from God.
    Always to see each day as a gift and offer each day of our life to our Father in Heaven by saying thy will be done 🌻

  • @themoonflowervine
    @themoonflowervine 2 роки тому +10

    My husband and I are currently expecting and this child is most definitely a gift ❤

  • @unabellavita6541
    @unabellavita6541 2 роки тому +5

    This one was hard for me. I grew up feeling both like I was a burden and a right to my parents. My mom told me she wished she had never had me. I was an accident, a mistake. I was abused, manipulated and taken advantage of my entire life because I was treated like a piece of property. They said I owed them because they gave birth me. I had no personal or human rights and I wasn’t treated with any dignity, it was a horrible.

    • @stutterstudios4731
      @stutterstudios4731 2 роки тому +1

      God loves you, sister! Life is broken, cling to His love for you💙🙏🏼 you are lovable

  • @amazingcommenter
    @amazingcommenter 2 роки тому +5

    I was trying for kids in my early married life. This message would've made a difference for those short years that gift was with held from us. Thankfully I did looked at it as focus on Jesus as my source of joy rather than a baby.

  • @ElliThill
    @ElliThill 2 роки тому +6

    My husband and I have been married for almost eight years and have been trying to start a family for almost 7 years. I have had two miscarriages. I have wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember. I know that children are gifts but I feel so sad when every month when I learn that I’m not expecting.

    • @marystenson2852
      @marystenson2852 2 роки тому +1

      I’m so sorry to read your post. May God bless you and your dear husband today and everyday❤️🌍🙏

    • @harriettannediger8772
      @harriettannediger8772 2 роки тому

      I feel you. After a while it can kind of ruin sex too.

    • @stutterstudios4731
      @stutterstudios4731 2 роки тому

      @@harriettannediger8772 if y’all are open to life and God doesn’t grant the gift, it is difficult, but try to be present and understand how much you’re loved. We don’t deserve gifts, and that’s ok🙏🏼💙

  • @blancaocana6397
    @blancaocana6397 2 роки тому +1

    My three children, are the most valuable gifts I have. Praise the Lord! Thank you Father Mike, God bless you.

  • @imalive4u169
    @imalive4u169 2 роки тому +18

    Children are a gift from God which is why Abraham and Sarah when they couldn't have children they believed that they weren't blessed. The thing is children are the future and eventually everyone dies as this is part of life. And your children are the part of you that lives on in this world even after you rest in the ground. A person that sees children as being a curse and doesn't want them when they die nothing is left of them as eventually all people are forgotten.
    I always found hypocrites get upset when a pregnant woman gets killed by a drunk driver in which her unborn child also dies or when a child is kidnapped and murdered. But yet these very same hypocrites say a woman should have the right to murder their unborn child in the womb. Having life is a fundamental right as everyone has the right to live including the unborn children.

    • @IONov990
      @IONov990 2 роки тому +2

      Very interesting that you point this out.

    • @miguelvanetta1485
      @miguelvanetta1485 2 роки тому +2

      I disagree with the idea that you should have children so "a part of you lives in the world after you die". Children are not a trophy. And Christ himself taught that celibacy was a higher call than getting married and having children.

    • @IONov990
      @IONov990 2 роки тому +1

      @@miguelvanetta1485 Some cultures still see children as property. Child abuse really scares me

    • @imalive4u169
      @imalive4u169 2 роки тому +1

      @@miguelvanetta1485 Christianity is about chastity and marriage and also about the sanctity of human life especially for the vulnerable. And as a parent myself I pass on my knowledge of my Catholic faith to my sons and one day they will have children of their own to pass on that faith to their children.

    • @ohwhataday7171
      @ohwhataday7171 2 роки тому +1

      Yes, you are right about those hypocrites. I don’t get it. Basically I think they really want to go with what is “trendy” or “popular” to show they are up with the latest. So sad. 😔

  • @solarbeauty5990
    @solarbeauty5990 2 роки тому +5

    Praying to one day have a child. Doctors seem to not think it’s likely but not impossible naturally. I’ve always thought children are a gift. I may not be able to have one. My heart is open to adoption. My father was adopted. I’ve also been on a prayer journey to know what God wants of me. It is difficult at times but I am learning to trust God and I believe in His love for me. I am also blessed with a very supportive husband.

    • @jsheca
      @jsheca 2 роки тому +1

      Going through the same. Hugs.

    • @rosemarymiller4485
      @rosemarymiller4485 2 роки тому +1

      I can honestly tell you God has a plan & that plan will stretch & strengthen you. It won't be easy but it will be a wonderful adventure. I talk from experience. I was 29 when I married my very supportive husband. Wasn't getting pregnant after a year. Told myself 2 years from now, one way or another (Adoption) we were going to have children.
      At 31 finally thrilled to be pregnant. Baby was stillborn at 22 weeks. We held & baptized our little one. On baby's projected due date, an incredibly difficult day, I got pregnant again. This time with triplets, losing them at 13 week. By the end of that year, when we weren't pregnant, we switched gears to strongly pursuing & educating ourselves in adoption. (Definitely NOT an easy path) 15 months later our darling son joined our family. Two more unplanned pregnancies & miscarriages & we adopted our daughter after many, many "things" tried to sideline her joining our family. Two more unplanned pregnancies (we always left it in God's hands) & 2 more miscarriages. Never as easy & carefree as I make it sound. Each & every baby was very wanted, loved, & mourned. Each circumstance was unique & painful, and some how also a strengthening blessing, only in hindsight. It makes no sense and yet it makes perfect sense.
      And then I got pregnant again. This time when I told my husband he literally said do we have to do this again, (it's such a tease of a rollercoaster ride! Adoption is more promising, for us.)
      Very, very long story short... After 3 months of horrible nausea & 5 months of bed rest, needing constant help with our now 5 year old son & 18 month old very active daughter, followed by 21 hours of induced labor then an emergency C-section, this, now 39 year old, well established Mom of 2, gave birth to her 3rd precious gift!!!
      Each child was/is/continues to be a MOST treasured, priceless, unique gift from God, individually & unrepeatable.
      It has been a great adventure, never boring & definitely NOT ordinary. Our children are now adults. We love the life God has blessed us with. Take a chance.....

  • @Snoozler
    @Snoozler 2 роки тому +4

    I'm a female (33) and never in my life desired a child. I just don't feel that maternal instinct.. Sometimes I wonder if this is some sort of disorder, like with SSA? I wish that I did want them - but I just don't.. And I don't know what to make of it. This is further complicated by the fact that I'm married, and now I don't know what to make of that, either..

  • @sandyschindler3836
    @sandyschindler3836 2 роки тому

    Nailed it, Father.... Thank you for laying that so well. It is brushing right up against whether we have an attitude of gratitude, or an attitude of entitlement/pride. It helps me check my heart every morning as I struggle to get out of bed :).

  • @lawrencegatti8283
    @lawrencegatti8283 2 роки тому

    One of your best, Father. I will be thinking this over for a long time.

  • @grigarious
    @grigarious 2 роки тому +3

    Thank you for this video. I struggle with thinking that having a child is a right and didn’t realize til I saw your video. Interestingly, I am reading the book of Samuel right now and I related to Hannah being desperate for a child. My husband and I are in our early thirties and I really want children, but hasn’t happened. I realized I need to put my faith in God and if he wants to bless us with a gift then he will. 💖

  • @bluejay4620
    @bluejay4620 2 роки тому +6

    God is so good. Thank you for speaking through Him, Father. You often post about things I have been pondering on.

  • @threekidzmom04
    @threekidzmom04 2 роки тому +4

    I say this so often that we need to get back to looking at and saying that children are gifts. Our society for decades has treated having children as a burden. We also need to hold up stay at home moms and stop demeaning them also. You do not waste anything by staying home and raising your children. It is most important and rewarding job on earth. Yes there are no guarantees raising children but there are no guarantees in any job in life.

  • @erindarcey1391
    @erindarcey1391 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you Father Mike for continually helping us grow in our understanding of our faith 🙏🏻 I’ve always considered my son to be an incredible blessing, and yet longed & prayed for more children which never came… Today I’m content to be incredibly grateful for the gift of motherhood, for the blessing of a precious boy who changed my life, and the Catholic faith we share~ 🥰💕🙏🏻

  • @jennifermartinez2771
    @jennifermartinez2771 2 роки тому +10

    When I named my son Matthew I didn't know the name means God's Gift. It was only afterwards that I found out the meaning. He truly has been a gift from God!
    🥰❤️
    Thank you Lord for my son...

  • @jims512
    @jims512 2 роки тому +2

    Please pray for my wife’s brother and his wife. They are unable to conceive so far in their two years of marriage. They are in their mid 30s so the pressure is mounting. Meanwhile, my wife and I are 40 and 41 and are pregnant for child number seven. They are truly happy for us but it’s a real cross for them.

  • @theophillanghishekwa6391
    @theophillanghishekwa6391 2 роки тому

    Thank fr. Mike. God bless you and your ministry

  • @bijoumarjoyeria7901
    @bijoumarjoyeria7901 2 роки тому +1

    What a blessing! Thank you father

  • @ceciliacasares9937
    @ceciliacasares9937 2 роки тому +1

    I share your feeling Father Mike! I don't like sharing other people's newborns. They are too fragile

  • @SMSP21
    @SMSP21 2 роки тому

    Thank you Fr Mike! So much! 🌟

  • @nojo1986
    @nojo1986 2 роки тому +1

    Always incredible timing. This January 2022 when it seems like nearly every day is a holiday, sick day, or snow day, it's good to remember my children are GIFTS. They are gifts that I'm locked-down with in the middle of winter, around the clock. And they are still gifts! 💕
    (Realllllly struggling with feeling a little distanced by your baby-holding admission🧐)🤣

  • @moniquearseneault1460
    @moniquearseneault1460 Рік тому

    Love your video .. your so gifted to do this , thank you and God bless .

  • @seans.1331
    @seans.1331 2 роки тому +6

    Good one, Fr. Mike. I appreciate your point of seeing things as a gift, rather than a curse or a right. Helpful.
    I recently read 'Marriage: The Mystery of Faithful Love' by Dietrich von Hildebrand. He made the point that love between spouses is primary, even more than having children. It is a profound book, somewhat similar to 'Reed of God' (recommended by Bobby and Jackie) in its depth. I am reading 'Made by God, Made for God' by Minerd, and he cited the book. I guess the Christian East has never seen children as the primary end of marriage, as contrasted with the West under the influence of (especially) Augustine ('Women & Men in the Early Church' by David Ford). Thank you, Fr. Mike. God bless.

  • @marilucervantes6225
    @marilucervantes6225 2 роки тому

    praying for you always, so God keep giving you knowledge to teach to us.

  • @TVA6
    @TVA6 2 роки тому +8

    #ASKFRMIKE Please do a video on predestination and free will.

  • @SuperRuthJ
    @SuperRuthJ 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you for sharing about not liking to hold babies. You are a father of many children, Father Mike. God bless and love you..🙏💖🙏

  • @ansond6372
    @ansond6372 2 роки тому

    Lol!! I can definitely relate to the first part of what you're saying 😆

  • @chaldeang7687
    @chaldeang7687 2 роки тому +1

    I love that you involved bible stories in the teaching. Do that more. Great video!

  • @mmut8602
    @mmut8602 2 роки тому +1

    Good multifaceted talk, Fr. Mike.

  • @simmyhearts
    @simmyhearts 2 роки тому

    I haven't heard the distinction of not only a child not being a curse as so many see but also not a right. That is so interesting, and I love how you related it to the day. It took me a long time to understand that every new day was a gift, and I continue to try and act upon that.

  • @ohwhataday7171
    @ohwhataday7171 2 роки тому

    Beautifully put, Father.

  • @alpanajames5621
    @alpanajames5621 2 роки тому

    Thank you so much Father !!!

  • @limepiper3650
    @limepiper3650 2 роки тому +2

    My daughter is the best gift GOD has given me.

  • @harrisonpowers4265
    @harrisonpowers4265 2 роки тому +18

    I’ve considered pediatrics, kids are definitely a gift to the world if they are raised correctly and fostered with love.

    • @user-cl6uj5bn2f
      @user-cl6uj5bn2f 2 роки тому +4

      They are a gift regardless of whether the adults in their life fulfill their duties to love and raise them properly, not "if".

  • @almamagallanes9920
    @almamagallanes9920 2 роки тому

    Father Mike I have been watching your videos for a couple of years now, and I just want to say thank you 🙏 I see you try your best to get into these difficult subjects and you help guide us through them. I desire to marry and have a family and for many years I thought it was my right to have these things. Now I see that it’s true, these if God wills it will be beautiful gifts that need to cared and loved by me. With these gifts comes responsibility. I get it, thank you 😊

  • @0329Christine
    @0329Christine 2 роки тому +1

    The problem with wanting children and a family is that people create a fantasy of what it will be. A hope. But children are the biggest role of the dice that you will ever make. They could have addictions, mental health issues or make choices that will cause you pain for your entire life. No one has caused me more pain than my child. But people don’t think like this. They just create a fantasy to fill an emotional need.

  • @shareenchoudhury-leighton1748
    @shareenchoudhury-leighton1748 11 днів тому

    💙 This is a beautiful way to embrace and rejoice the gifts that God ... However, the second part is so difficult when the heart desires something, but God has other plans! 😢 May God be you 💙

  • @hoot9356
    @hoot9356 2 роки тому +1

    Love every video and message. I’m trying to figure out on Sundays Mass 1/16/2022 you didn’t have a beard now on a new video 1/19/2022 your beard is back. I think you have some explaining.
    Thank You Father. May God Bless you and give you all you need to continue what your doing.

  • @nehalesbarchard5247
    @nehalesbarchard5247 2 роки тому +2

    Wow... explain this to my brother. Now I love kids...but I am more inclined towards adoption. I'm not completely sure if I can conceive. I mean my ex- husband called me barren. But, there's another world for me. I'm beginning to see the glimpses. I ❤️❤️ it.

    • @cissykengoro6465
      @cissykengoro6465 2 роки тому +2

      I'm starting to catch glimpses too! Praying for you over here

  • @MrBemma1
    @MrBemma1 2 роки тому

    Fr. I think we need to have a follow up on this video. I think it’s going in a good direction, and it’s a struggle many deal with.

  • @kimg1210
    @kimg1210 Рік тому

    Wow, that was amazing explained. Thank you Father Mike. As a younger mom of just adult children, I feel like we are hitting our hard times with their seasons of life. I have asked this question unfortunately selfishly. When those hard times are happening, I will remember that they are a gift and someday they may experience that gift as well. Side note - love that you always say does that make sense because I always say that......I wonder if people are understanding what is coming out of my mouth because it sounds right in my head!

  • @cindyb5065
    @cindyb5065 2 роки тому +10

    Children are a gift. Teenagers are a nightmare 😜. That’s about the time I would have loved to give the gift back.

  • @greensquid1755
    @greensquid1755 2 роки тому +3

    I saw a girl I used to be friends with say on Instagram stories that it was so selfish to have any more than one kid and I can’t get over how despicable that was. It really makes me wonder how she could’ve thought that was okay to post to her thousands of followers 😬

    • @stutterstudios4731
      @stutterstudios4731 2 роки тому

      If she’s not properly catechized, then it makes total sense why she would say that. Pray for her conversion and being shown God’s love for her

  • @DeeDeeRich35
    @DeeDeeRich35 2 роки тому +3

    "You can's assert the right to a gift." Deep Fr. Mike.

  • @sylvialandsberg1654
    @sylvialandsberg1654 2 роки тому

    You so right Father children are more than a gift they are a blessing

  • @jjm4611
    @jjm4611 2 роки тому

    I haven't watched the video. But my kids are the best gift the God allowed me to be a part of. It made me understand his love for us.

  • @beautyofdawn9565
    @beautyofdawn9565 2 роки тому

    I am so glad someone has said it!! These days it seems like it's trendy not to want children and you're seen as selfish or hokey if you do. And the number of people who tell me "well you won't have money, children are money pits". I did my travelling and fun years- I want to raise children into healthy, loving, Catholic adults.

  • @spidermiddleagedman
    @spidermiddleagedman 2 роки тому

    I see my days as my children now!

  • @colleenwelsh2397
    @colleenwelsh2397 2 роки тому

    Allowing God to give us theses sanctifying gifts, these incomprehensible blessings of a child, also allows us, small as we are to give back to God a gift of a soul that can praise Him forever. I thank God everyday for allowing me to have an amount of faith that welcomed these eternal gifts of my children. When I am only starting to receive the grace to appreciate, really appreciate, what a gift they are to my soul. Our children are our mustard seeds. It may not be in our lifetime that we see the mountains moved, but they are moving mountains.

  • @myratogonon
    @myratogonon 2 роки тому

    EXCELLENT EXPLANATION

  • @franciscojuan4551
    @franciscojuan4551 2 роки тому

    Also applies to our jobs and daily tasks

  • @hornatham1487
    @hornatham1487 2 роки тому

    “Get it off my chest “love this Father.

  • @marcuskaysen9300
    @marcuskaysen9300 2 роки тому +5

    My girlfriend hates children and hates the idea of pregnancy. She does see them as a burden and curse. I pray for her and am trying to get her to see that we can still donate to orphanages or set up scholarships for those who need help in college. But it is a topic that’s so hard to talk about with her.

    • @ellenrussell8005
      @ellenrussell8005 2 роки тому +2

      I'll pray for her as well. God bless her.

    • @IONov990
      @IONov990 2 роки тому +1

      Some modern women seeing children are depriving them of their independence.

    • @christinebutler7630
      @christinebutler7630 2 роки тому +16

      But if she does not want to bear and raise children, she is not marriage material, which raises the question of why she's your girlfriend . Love is wonderful but there is no future there.

    • @claudiap.6838
      @claudiap.6838 2 роки тому +1

      She is being selfish. We are here to serve and yes, if serving is not in one’s heart, then they might see children as a burden.

    • @erint6540
      @erint6540 2 роки тому +6

      Friend, I encourage you to reconsider this relationship. Instead of finding ways to make right the path of childlessness, please find a lovely woman who desires a family. I know it can be hard to let go, but God will lead you to the right one.

  • @DenisOhAichir
    @DenisOhAichir 2 роки тому +1

    Well put Father.

  • @seeker2219
    @seeker2219 9 місяців тому

    It takes great wisdom to understand why a kid is not ones right, but more so...
    it takes honesty with oneself wich people not want to hear about these days.

  • @briangeraghty1555
    @briangeraghty1555 2 роки тому

    Interesting Fr. I love holding babies. There is no greater image of gods glory than newborn. Holding one close reminds us very personally how precious life is. I think it is a great reminder of how Jesus wants us to love one another.

  • @lizguz2771
    @lizguz2771 2 роки тому

    Loved the peanut butter example!! We have 7 kids and only one HATED peanut butter since like, infancy. Kicker… an allergy test at age 8 revealed he’s allergic!! Until that test, we also judged him as weird. Lol!

  • @Metalcomedienne
    @Metalcomedienne Рік тому

    As a Roman Catholic, I will keep praying to have children and to receive my gifts from Jesus. ❤ God bless you father Mike. Amen.

  • @malice836
    @malice836 2 роки тому +1

    Exactly!

  • @sherryslr
    @sherryslr Рік тому

    Fr Mike, you have expressed my feelings about baby-holding precisely. I feel exactly the way that you do on every count. I had to laugh as you "came out." 🤣😇

  • @amandadanis4477
    @amandadanis4477 2 роки тому +1

    Every soul has a purpose , even though some children arrive at an unexpected time or difficult moment that doesn’t mean we must see them as burdens but God already knows what you will feel and what we will do , even the wrong choices in this world serve a purpose and God is testing your ability to over come the obstacles and accepting a new born life as a beautiful gift is a must … even if it were to be a loss. Their soul served a purpose in your life.