Coup De Grace - D&December Tales
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- Опубліковано 9 лют 2025
- The most brutal, instant kill.
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Welcome to D&December! Spending the entire month of December talking, playing, and celebrating all things Dungeons & Dragons!
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Boar.....
Boar never changes.....
That's boarcrap!
Raymond The Crow
Boar.....has changed.....
boared to death
I.D. tag boars carry I.D. tag dice
but a marriage does
I once whispered something so intimidating to a pair of kobolds, they both killed themselves.
You must be great in a relationship. :P
what was it?
This was like two years ago, so I don't exactly remember what I said exactly, but it was something along the lines of, "You are nothing before my righteous fury." It was while a village was under attack, and we were trying to sneak around (why it was whispered) and because I was bored and had put almost all of my points into intimidate I decided to ruin some kobolds day. My dm wasn't happy about it because he didn't think intimidation is something you want to do when you're sneaking. He was REALLY not happy when I rolled a natural 20.
lol
If he didn't think Intimidation was something you'd want to do while sneaking, he's clearly never seen Batman in action.
One of my player once died because they were on 1 hit points and tried to hit on a barmaid to get a free healing potion (or something to that effect) and she critical punched him and cracked his scull straight down the centre... the player wasn't happy
EveryoneHatesAlexander XD
EveryoneHatesAlexander
I hope that barmaid was arrested for assult and murder
EveryoneHatesAlexander I had a very similar thing happen to one of my friends ,but she was trying to flirt with a dragon born and I repeat a DRAGON BORN who just happened to be a level 10 paladin we were all level 2 except for me a level 3 fighter and he used hellish rebuck or however you say it.she had 4 hit points and he crit. so yeah she was ash ,fun.
That shouldn't have killed him. You only die when you drop below negative your maximum hit points.
Close, but no cigar.
Depending on the edition/system, It's either below -10, or it's below your constitution score.
My 1st level party (first session) got ambushed by goblins on a road and my gnome wizard (not a dedicated illusionist) decided to cast a ghost sound of reinforcements coming (hoping to startle them out of their advantage)...The DM asked if I had previously discussed such a strategy with the party (I hadn't.)
Everyone had to check for surprise. My party (sans me of course) all failed and turned to look (while I started to get some distance for further spell casting) while all but one of the goblin raiding party passed. They all rolled exceptionally well on their attacks of opportunity and dropped my entire party. The DM then looked at me and said "Congratulations, you're now alone with an entire goblin raiding party chasing after you. What are you going to do?" Realizing the futility of my situation, I just set my weasel familiar free, told it to run for it's life, made an insulting gesture towards my foes, pulled out my thwackem' stick (ornately carved club that my gnome was fond of) and proceeded to brain one of them before being torn apart by the rest...Total TPK (by goblins no less)...from a single ghost sound...
(The DM decided to be nice and said that the entire session had just been a nightmare my gnome had had prior to us leaving on our adventure allowing us to keep the characters and starting over the next session...since we had spent more time creating them than the first session had lasted...)
These kinds of stories are why I get up in the morning, because honestly who does not enjoy to laugh. Thank you for writing this so that I could laugh at your previous misery.
Thwackem stick is the best thing ive ever heard thank you so much
This is why we need Goblin Slayer in our games.
I wasn't in this game, but this is a story my brother told me. He was playing a Barbarian Dwarf and in this game they were investigating a haunted house (this was the Curse of Strahd module). The Wizard was put to sleep and my brother's Barbarian had to carry him. They found an encounter with some skeletons. My brother went first in combat and he said "I drop (Wizard's name that I have forgotten) and I charge at them with my short sword." Then it gets to the Wizards turn eventually and the DM tells him to make a Dexterity save. He fails and the DM said that after my brother's character dropped him he and took 1d4 damage. He rolled a 4. He was a First level Wizard with a 10/11 Constitution. He died instantly by being dropped my by brother. Thankfully their Paladin, Chromwell (Later known as the Resurrector), healed him.
DarkVaati13 What edition? If it was first or second he should have had to reach -10 before death.
It was 5th. He wasn't technically dead, but he was in a dying state where you're at or below 0 and have to start rolling death saving throws.
Well it seems you got the details a bit wrong (considering it's not your own story but your brother's, that's understandable), for multiple reasons.
a) 5th edition Wizards have a d6 instead of a d4, so a Con 10/11 lvl 1 Wizard should have 6 HP.
b) dropping to 0 hit points is not immediately fatal (unless the excess damage from a single attack is equal to the character's HP maximum) so he definitely should not have died instantly.
Either way, the core idea of the story certainly still shows - lvl 1 Wizard gets dropped to 0 hit point... literally! :-p
Narokh You missed how tall the barbarian was. You don't take fall damage for the first ten feet right? How many dwarves are over ten feet tall?
Wowwwww. Talk about dropping dead weight
Incredible.
Boar.
I embarrassed my DM I guess because he threw a colossal red dragon at us, thinking it'd be a big deal. Turn one, our mage managed to stun him and with the feat Dastardly finish, I was able to perform a coup de grace on the colossal dragon on my turn.
As a monk/rogue, unarmed fighter.
So, turn 1, I rip out the spine of a red dragon 50 times my size.
The DM wasn't expecting the fight to end so fast.
FUCK ME that's badass
but... don't dragons get an ability where they can save any check 3 times per day? idk (never played 3rd ed/pathfinder)
*Fatality*
WonderChickens nope ,legendary resistance is a 5 e thing , i think.
That's a mean ass DM
Yeah, especially since summoned creatures only last 1 round a level, if it stuck around for 4 rounds, that sorcerer had to be level 4.
I'm not saying this is what happened, and no matter what the DM was stone-cold in making the boar coup de grace a non-threat instead of going for, you know, someone still up and being a threat, but there was a feat in 3.0 that let you extend the summoning time for your creatures, so he might have only been 2nd.
Didn't it only stay 2 rounds? killed him on the 2nd round
Bakron He said a couple of rounds later, so it killed him on the second one, and then it disappeared later. I'm just going on by what was said, and you're probably right that it was a total of 2 instead.
*****
Yeah, Jared's never been the best at keeping the finer details straight in his head while he's telling these stories.
My most embarrassing death?
A mushroom cultist killed me by forcing giant spiked vines down my throat.
Insert your own hentai joke here.
hentai joke? that was terrifying
at least with the spikes... without them...you got hentai'ed to death XD
*****
Did I mention that trying to pull the vines out is what killed me and even if they hadn't the seeds the vines planted in my stomach would have?
*****
The DM was just that kind of guy.
Also it didn't help that it was my first time playing and I thought I could use my +1 Flaming Falchion as a makeshift torch to light up a black hole in the ground. Turns out it was actually a Sphere of Annihilation.
Again, the DM was just that kind of guy.
MadDemon64 that was some call of cthulhu shit...no joke
*****
And yet it was Pathfinder.
I blacked out and nearly died trying to have sex with a slime once. It was probably one of the worst dates I've ever had.
N00BSYBORG ...why?
hellothisismufin That's a good question.
N00BSYBORG ... are you going to answer it?
why? havent you guys sex with a slime? its awesome!
SnappGamez Too much Monster Musume but it's also actually part of his character. I like to play weird characters.
The bards shall sing of the great Jared the Rogue, who was gloriously gutted by a pig.
To be fair, boars are extremely dangerous in real life and a human definitely would not win a one-on-one throwdown without some kind of equalizer. If you're tagged by one of those tusks, forget it, you're done.
If you don't have at _bare minimum_ a .44 Magnum, you had best be running. A .308 would be much more appropriate.
I critical success drop kicked a beholder to death
Grumpledagron monk?
hellothisismufin Paladin my dude
all i can see is a guy in full (i means like completely full so barely any areas for attacks to get through) plate armor just running up at full speed jumping sticking his feet out in front and just rocketing through the massive eye and out the back of it's head
Ethan Probert That's exactly what happened
I was DMing my party, and at the and of the very first session the aaracokra monk randomly decided to throw the corpse of a goblin down a staircase to punish the half orc paladin that just said something extremely stupid. The problem was that he rolled a 19, the paladin had 1 hit point left and nobody had remaining spell slots. The paladin died while everyone, himself too, was laughing, and I even gave experience to the killers.
Nick23999 hahahahahahha who could have made such a stupid thing?
Nick23999 you are lying
People sometimes do stupid things just for the hell of it. Happens all the time.
Don't worry Jared, my most embarassing death was when I tried throwing a sandwich to another party member, getting it stuck up my nose, and dying.
Manectric I must know how this happened.
What the hell happened?
Red XIII I'm....extremely curious about this...
two words, nat 1.
That's the day you learned to fear the bullfango
Most embarrassing death?
I once fell out of a tree and was knocked out for two turns and all of my friends left me for dead ;^;
With friends like that, who needs enemies?
The 3rd Edition Boar has 3HD (At 25 Hit Points, AC 16) at Challenge Rating 2. CR 2 basically means one Boar is meant to be a standard encounter for 4 level 2 Characters.
So honestly? Dying to it really isn't that embarrassing, you were heavily out matched. XD
D&D Folks! A game where a Boar is a legit challenge for warriors and adventurers!
Considering boars can be pretty badass in real life, it isn't entirely unreasonable that they'd be a legit challenge for level 1 adventurers in a fantasy world.
Where it gets embarassing is that in at least one edition of D&D, I forget which, a housecat is of a higher CR than a peasant.
Depends on what you interpret Level 1 to be. A fresh out newbie? Or a person of such skill they've ascended beyond the Commoner Class? Thus making them among societies most skilled.
Regardless though, my point was more so that Mechanically speaking it was rather expected for Jared to die there.
And in Pathfinder (so probably also D&D 3e) they have an ability called ferocity that lets them stay conscious until they reach negative health equal to their con score. Though for a summon I think they're banished at zero HP anyway.
Not quite. In 3rd edition Ferocity does the following:
"A boar is such a tenacious combatant that it continues to fight without penalty even while disabled or dying".
And in 3rd any creature dies at -10HP no matter what, constitution doesn't play a role. And that editions summon monster spell doesn't list a clause of a summon going away once at zero HP.
Does anyone else think that Jared d and December is just a month long Christmas present
mp030 nononaint no Christian, I’m atheist
I mean, I had two different embarrassing "deaths" with one character. The thing was that I kept surviving despite all the odds, effectively faking my own death two times. First, my party abandons me (save the jerk who decided it would be funny to blind me) to fight a hydra on my own. I manage to hide long enough that it left. Second, I get picked up by the large party of legionaries tracking my party. I resist the magical oath of compulsive loyalty they tried to force on me, but don't manage to bluff that I actually took that oath. They've healed me a bit, and I resist their hold person when they attempt to leave me to drown. What nearly kills me is the halberd through the gut that their leader sticks me with. But I do manage to bluff that I'm still paralyzed, and stay under the water until the legion party is out of sight. And this is the best part.
The DM turned to me after I surfaced and just said, "So...you found a halberd."
The craziest part of your story was how you had to resist the legionaries. If my party blinded my character and left him to die alone to a hydra, when the legionaries appeared I would swear my fealty and point then towards the assholes who betrayed me before they got a chance to use their magical oath on me.
I got killed by a lava worm once but I was being a dumbass trying to make it my pet.
CRANTIME I have a party member who does that
Your lore about being gored by a war boar while you snored was adorable.
Not in DnD, but one of my players once noticed there was a bomb trap attached to a door and alerted the rest of the group not to go in. Half an hour later somebody came by that door and said, "hey we didn't check this room yet! I open this door-" dead.
Most embarrassing death I've ever witnessed occurred due to a house-rule on a magic item. It was a sword which would heal the user via dealing damage, and could give temp hp, but you'd have to make saves based on the temp hp you've gained or die, which I made a ruling so the NPC wielding it wouldn't be too crazy strong for the two players he was facing. They won by being horrible failures. They never hit him. He blew up on a rather easy save because he hit too often and they never hit back.
That's amazing, but you have my sympathy. I once had a Paladin riding a pegasus... who got hit by Glitter Dust in the first round and had to flee after 3 rounds of my players beating and mocking him mercilessly.
Fors Clavigera
Best part of it is I ruled they were absolutely soaked in viscera, and when one of them went to put on his armor because it was better than theirs, it was also filled with a thick meaty paste of Dorn The Kin-Slayer. But yeah, it really sucks having your villains die or be beaten in silly ways. And ain't nothin' embarrassing about losing to Glitter Dust; all fear the mighty Gnome Sorcerer, Jamhorn Glittergold!
Alas the struggles of being a DM
My group (well half of it, the rest were too busy planning how to escape to fight, spineless cowards) had the final blow to an ancient red dragon dealt as a vampiric touch by a pixie who had "infiltrated" the dragon from behind.
The tale will be told many times in many taverns.
Diath the rogue... killed by boar.
R.I.P
Diath
loved by many, hated by more
was killed to death by a boar
One time in a Pathfinder campaign my cleric of the goddess of the sun was fighting a giant white tree looking monster, bare of leaves. No one in the party knew exactly what it was. After a few rounds we get it down to low health, but my cleric is also pretty low.
I figure I'll just finish it off with a fire spell because trees burn pretty good right? So my cleric starts casting his spell while keeping his guard up against the tree's attacks, when he's done casting he sprays a cone of fire right at the base of the tree and... it's completely unaffected. Turns out it's actually resistant to fire!
Then it's the tree's turn and it slams a branch into my poor cleric, killing him instantly. I decided to have him reject resurrection because I just wasn't enjoying the character. I brought in a new half-orc cleric of the god of war and he kicked major ass, but that death still stings.
Necroceine What the hell was that thing?
Well since it's from Kingmaker, a published AP, I was able to find out fairly easily. It would've been the second book, before certain things happened that I remember my second cleric was there for. (Specifically, a fey creature that was really hard to hit so my cleric just spent a few rounds casting all my buffs while others distracted her and then crit with his greatsword, killing her in one blow.)
Anyway, there's one huge tree that fits the description statted in there and it's a Scythe Tree... which is actually in fact vulnerable to fire and not resistant. Curse that GM but not really because I'm kinda glad cleric 1 died.
Eh, we were all new and to be fair a lot of plants are resistant to fire in Pathfinder. I'd probably be actually mad if that character wasn't poorly built and boring to play.
Was the mage casting summon animal Annoying, or BOARING!
Why...
neither... it was super effective. or suBOAR effective if you will XD
knate44 Oh, please. You can pun better than that.
I am now convinced getting into shenanigans is pretty much Jared's schtick in games and D&D.
Especially looking at how is randomizers and his Hardcore participation plays out.
Wish there was more D&D content on UA-cam. You should do more D&D stuff out side of December Jared!
This is one reason why I like D&D. You never know what could happen.
I had my character's head ripped off by a stupidly overpowerful robot.
Everyone was happy, because this character was a self-satisfied news reporter.
I actually survived a coup once. I don't think we used the exact survival rules, but I do know all our characters were intentionally allowed to be OP, because we were fighting entire armies more or less. So my con was like 26 or something just wtf-level, and I had decent bonuses as a psychic warrior. But hey, it was all allowed!
HAH i'v never died
because i haven't played as a player yet
Bidoof The Destroyer what's with your profile..?
it's because bidoof is the true pokemon god
It's a Bidoof with parts of pretty much every legendary pokemon sewn on it somewhere.
If you made your profile picture, props to you.
markhodges12 seems like that..
Keep it coming I abolsolutly love hearing these tales, now if only I can get friends around and play dnd
Kurtis Leung same here
You can always try one of the various TableTop Gaming websites online, such as Roll20 to both set up/join groups and play online. Though obviously it's more fun when you're with friends IRL. If your're in school, you can also check to see if you have like, a gaming club, too. That's where I met some friend who I played it with during high school.
Kurtis Leung check to see if your local comic book shop hosts DND adventure league. It's a great way to introduce players to d&d
To answer the questions... Well here's the problem. I live in the most quiet, boring ass town and I have to have somebody drive half hour to go anywhere, even then I don't think the nearby towns have a comic shop, another thing is there's no such thing as a gaming club cause I'm in a private school, and most of these things were from the getting started video that Jared made...... Thanks anyways though much appreciated for caring
Kurtis Leung a lot of systems have online groups! which means you at best have to be in the same timezone :)
My goblin barbarian, Poogis, was at a bar and the bar keeper ended up being part of the main cult of our story. Poogis had been upset when the bar keeper knocked down all the drinks on the counter. Infuriated, the goblin hopped hops up onto the counter and hits him with a mighty swing.Taken aback the bar keeper smashes a bottle onto the little green cretin's head and they proceed to trade blows. Eventually my DM goes rolls and rolls a 1. He asks me to roll and I also roll a 1. What my DM decides what happens is: The barkeeper takes a swing, but not used to fighting such a small creature, and misses horrible as Poogis goes to meet it but slip and fall from the booze that covered the counter. He then falls head first into the barkeepers crotch instantly crushing both balls. The barkeeper dies from shock.
Okay, one-shotted by what's basically a pig with tooth issues is bad.
Don't think it tops Spoony with "Character got killed during character creation", but it's close.
gimok2k5
wait what? dying during the character creation? where can I find that?
Yeah, please do.
gimok2k5 heh. It's better then trying to play dnd yourself and getting killed in the first battle....
Eemi Seppälä Thank you so much! It was long but I had a blast... A psyonic blast!
Boars are an actual big threat, They destroy crops and can kill.
The DM fudged that, I don't think a Boar can Coup de Grace you, because it requires a precise strike.
stupid rule lawers
TheDelta0seven well, I don't think the rule of cool overrides when a Boar kills you while you are sleeping at level 1 xD
lol fair enough. but at lest you are level 1 not level 6 or worse something like 20 . ha.
I'm saddened by the fact that these videos don't get many views. Aside from ProJared's Monster Hunter videos, D&December are my favourite videos he makes. Hope you keep at it man.
My most embarrassing fail was in Star Wars: Force and Destiny. Me and my buddies were raiding an Imperial Star Destroyer and my Wookiee Jedi friend got separated from us while crawling through the ventilation shafts. We get to the bridge and are informed that the Wookiee is being held hostage by shocktroopers. Being the other Wookiee Jedi in the party, I go to rescue him. I find the hole he made in the ventilation and I look down and see nothing but darkness. I use the force and I sense him. I then jump down the hole. My mistake because it was a three story drop. I hit the floor and black out and miss the fight with the Inquisitor.
kicking a goblin so hard in the groin. Dying on the sheer impact to the groin and send it flying.
My most embarrassing death was dying to a door. Not a mimic that was a door, just a door...
These videos are always great. Every year it inspires me to get some old high school friends together to play a few adventures.
I remember a recent campaign where we were playing a bunch of young dragons and at one point we fought a bunch of frost giants.
The fun part was when I, as I think a Copper dragon or whatever metallic one has lightning breath, hit a called shot through a giant's eyeball and into its brain. It didn't kill it, it just paralyzed it, but my brother egged me into an interesting Coup de Grace so I pulled the giant's brain out through its eye socket, much to everyone's squick. The one remaining one surrendered after I threw the brain at it.
that finale part... wow your a jerk... no really, thats just MEAN. that could be his dad! traumatised him...
Liam Masters The giant could talk and it wasn't his dad, but it was his friend and he was traumatized.
I had to do something with the brain.
I would have done the exact same thing lel.
Kylelolcat you could have kept it, and thrown it at the dad later.
Caddy and Jared each uploading a part of their most anticipated video series in the exact same minute?
...
IT'S FRIGGIN' ALIENS!!! (lol)
So, Jared.
Sorry to say that, but that's not how you say "coup de grâce".
The way you say it actually means "hitting something with fat", which is... a pretty mean thing to do.
XD
Dr Umbrus I think that the "with fat" actually is meant like "using elbow grease", which makes much more sense. Your interpretation is funny, though. :)
Well, he says it like "coup de gras". "Coup" means hitting or in this case "the hit". "de" is "of" or "from" depending of the case. And "gras" is the word for fat. So, it's along the lines of "fat hit", or something like that, I'm not really sure on how to tell it in english, so I went with "hitting with fat"
On the other hand, the real expression, "coup de grâce" (say it like "grass", it's closer to the real thing), is "the grace hit", the one that you use out of mercy to kill your opponent.
Native French speaker/soon-to-be French teacher here, can confirm what Dr Umbrus is saying.
It's not that annoying if you keep saying it that way, it's been assimilated in the English language by now. But the exact way to pronounce it is like "grass" with a stressed /ɑ:/ sound like in "part".
There's also a /ʁ/ sound thrown in there but it's kinda hard for non-natives.
Can confirm. xP
My most interesting sort of? death:
Through a lot of stuff happening the God of Death himself actually showed up in human form to basically intimidate the party of the immense danger of the situation. My wild magic sorcerer was a bit of a hothead and didn't know this was a God at the time so he decided to threaten this person...
The threat didn't work and the person decided to "make an example." This person reached into my source of magic and caused ALL 50 wild magic effects to affect my character immediately. The funny thing was the dm forgot one of the wm rolls has you reincarnate after death so after being fucking pummelled with a fireball, some lightning, necrotic magic, turning into a potted plant very briefly, etc my character reincarnated as a half elf woman (he was a male tiefling) in front of everyone. Death's host was actually shocked and backed off xD
I love these videos, and I don't even play D&D. Hope to hear more through the rest of December. :)
same here, i only played Vampire years ago
I almost got killed by a crit from a Construct Scythe.. 4x damage. if i wasnt a monk, id have been dead. it was the first turn and we were lvl 1. my allies ran me to the nearest cleric lol
Oh boy, I love storys with Jared being a player.
Great story (and video, as always) :)
Oh, and in french, it's pronounce "Kou de grass".
Trust me : i'm french ^^
Merci je suis venu dans les comments pour ça :P
Kuu the grahss?
Ku deh grâss?
je ne parle bon francais.
mais, je pensais qu'il l'avait prononce correctement?
Yeah he's good it's super close, only missing the SSssss sound for grace ... otherwise it sounds like ''coup de gras'' (blow of fat) instead of ''coup de grâce'' (blow of mercy)
But like I said he's super good and I love him. I've heard francophones mispronounce it exactly like he does.
Oh ok. Thats nice to know then. but isn't fat grosse, like gro in english "grow" and sse like s in "snake"? i think the r in there rolls a little too as well.
Yes if you want to say; a FAT lady. It would be ''une GROSSE femme'' but the fat I was referring to was as in; wow there's a lot of FAT in this food = ''wow il y a beaucoup de GRAS dans cette nourriture''
lol..look at me, the french teacher of youtube comments
My marathon of rewatching, liking, and commenting on every Jared video continues. Video 65
3.5 edition, the DM was having our party of level 4/5 adventurers investigate this toy shop where mysterious deaths in the town had been linked to. We discovered, naturally, that the shopowner was evil, and that he had a plan to create a bunch of mannequin monsters to wreak havoc all across the land. We happened to stumble upon one of these monsters in the basement of this toy shop, but due to the circumstances, our wizard (I believe, it might have been our sorcerer aka me) set off a single Grease spell.
The DM then had to roll to see if the creature could stand up and walk through it, and rolled a natural 1. Down the mannequin went, and down too went our blades. Of course, his health wasn't totally depleted yet, so the DM tried to roll again to help him get up.
Again, he rolled a 1. This happened three times.
We went through the monster's entire health bar while it just kind of awkwardly flailed around on the ground. After an embarrassed cough, our adventurers "triumphantly" left, not sure if we were supposed to win that easily.
Love it Jared. Hope your noggen contains a lot more of these stories and hope you have time to create a lot more!
i thought of finn balor when i saw the title
lol same XD
cameron chambers We all know how to pronounce it! :D
Barry West can i say on a unrealted note am the only one who when they see the kingsahsa they have to do a corey graves and scream it
Haha maybe not out loud but I do in my head.
Man I love these videos. I started rolling up some characters the other day just in anticipation of future games after your last video.
The worst part of this series is we're going to have to wait a year for more when it's over...
I've seen at least two adventurers gored by boars. Don't dis the boar!
IoKnight Robert Baratheon style?
Aw ye, new D&December video.
there's already a dislike, and no one's finished the video yet
Mr. Hedgehog This saddens me.
Mr. Hedgehog probably because he mispronounces coup de grâce then makes fun of people who don't know how to pronounce coup de grâce XD
One thing I really liked about Star Wars D20 Revised (basically the same system as Jared's talking about here but for Star Wars) was that they specified that an unaware opponent counts as helpless. As such, if some random mook has their back turned and doesn't know you're there, bit doesn't matter what class you are, you have a decent chance to instantly murder them. Because it used the wounds/vitality system out of unearthed arcana too, the instant crit was pretty nasty too.
There was a very embarrassing death in my game, due to one of the player being chaotic stupid. So in my game there were this two PCs that were always at each others throat, it was a Paladin Oathbreaker and an assasin Rogue. The rogue was always way more powerful than the paladin, because he liked to min max, but he never killed the paladin because his character was good. So my party went to fight an adult white dragon at 9th level and almost everyone dropped to their death saves but they all passed except the rogue. So a few sesions go by and the player that created the rogue comes back as an aaracockra monk. The paladin tries to pick on him just before they enter a dungeon by trying to cut his wings, but he fails and the monk flies away. Afterwards they all enter the dungeon anyways and discover it's a death trap and they have to escape. They all manage to escape except the paladin that got caught by giant spiders and the only one who can save him is the monk by flying over them, but he doesn't and leaves the paladin to die. That was my favorite death of the campaign and even better because my own players took care of the chaotic stupid character.
I was so /Boar/ed until this video came up. ProJared with another funny DnD story. Keep them coming, it's always a pleasure to watch!
I've also died at lvl 1 on my first combat. Crit from a goblin's morning star...
Really not your fault. That is the reason I disabled crits for first level.
I was playing a halfling rogue in the pathfinder system and we had to destroy an illegal plant so potent that when a pinch of the plant makes skin contact it makes the user so high that their eyes turn black. Well, we were carrying said substance up to a ladder and for whatever reason, our mage was carrying some and I was under him. We all had to make a strength check to carry the plant up the ladder. We all passed except for the mage obviously. Well since I was under him the stuff fell all over me and I fell off the ladder. I then had to make a will save to not OD on the substance. With my luck, I rolled a natural 1. My DM then said " I'll let you make the save again since we just started the campaign, but if you roll another natural 1 you die" I through the D20 down, it topples for a little while, and then it stopped on a 1. smh. Because of this, the plant caused blood clots in my body so massive that my veins exploded and I died. And that is the most embarrassing death I've ever witnessed and it was my death.
huh, maybe I should've allowed my buddies to die more when I dm'd
same here
I know this is like over a year old but one time I kicked a large crab and it exploded
Any more stories with steve?
I FOUND A SECRET DOOR!!!!!!
Thenkai Daisuke I cast cure light wounds on ORC!
is dere a draegun in dere?
I'LL GO RIGHT! *walking into a wall* Htere is no secret door here...
I imagine we all get back to our homeland safely!
: D
My Coup deGrace caught fire... well, just the dashboard.
Most embarrassing death I dealt an enemy:
I was playing a Rogue Dragonborn named Vas
I slashed his nuts off then stabbed him up the dick with my shortsword and called it a Vas-ectomy
I like the thought of how this played out.
Jared sneaks at the mage, is immediatly seen, runs at him, the mage summons a boar, Jared unsheates his blade, ready to strike, jumping at the boar... and just falls flat on his face as he falls asleep.
I guess you just couldnt bring home the bacon.
Fun story though, I really need to start playing DnD
Me and a group of friends got together to play D&D, along with a few friends new to the game. During the second fight against a bunch of pirates, one of them got a critical hit, and we had agreed to use a critical hit table meaning that all sorts of things could happen. The pirate maxed the table as well, which meant beheading. They died early on in their very first session ever playing d&d.
unborable
Thanks for the story.
The most embarrassing death I dealt to an enemy in d and d was wrapping my pants around a town guard and reading an explosive rune previously planted on the pants and watching the guy's head fly
could have been worse. you could have been a commoner fighting a housecat.
mastrvidman15 I need the background on this. Please explain.
I'm guessing in a certain Monster Manual a house cat is stronger than a commoner?
skorkabian It's a running joke that in 3.5, if a level 1 commoner fought a housecat, more often then not, the housecat would win.
mastrvidman15 Omg, yes 😂
PhyreI3ird I used a site to generate a level 100 commoner the other day. the end result was hilarious.
On one of my first games after returning to D&d (4th edition) the party was waylaid by Orc robbers. It was just a random encounter, nothing tied to the plot and was mostly there to spice things up. Our wizard cast sleep and accidentally miscounted the range of the spell, putting the entire friendly party (sans himself) to sleep... and 0 orcs. One orc had already rolled 2 critical hits in the fight, and since the wizard was far away and he was adjacent to a sleeping hero... he performed a coup de grace, instantly killing him by cutting his head off with a greataxe. This same orc was the last one alive, rolling 2 more crits during the fight.
I later resurrected him and stitched his body with the dwarf he had killed to form the game's penultimate boss, who the party fought over a lava bed. His name... was Steve.
it's actually pronounced "grahs," so... :P
Great story! I got coup de grace'd in my very first adventure. My poor paladin didn't survive his first session. :(
I love December just because of this videos (and maybe a bit because of my bday).
Keep em up!
I dunno what the videos about but imma go play MHGen
Playing Warhammer 40K, Dark Heresy. My group was playing a "reverse your role" game, so I played a big meat head with a hypercube filled with grenades. After throwing a grenade at a boss, I miss slightly, and hit a pillar. No one pays attention to it, and we play about 4 more turns. I suddenly run into said pillar....The pillar rolled a 20 as it fell on me. I died instantly, with over 90% of my life left.
The French still pronounce the s sound in 'coup de grâce' because it's followed by a mute e. It's not pronounced 'grarrr' lol.
It's not a mute e, grace is pronounced like grass, in french the e is pronounced.
Mauraaal No it's not, lol. it is in some songs/poems/plays in order to force a rhyme, but not in normal speech.
Sources: I speak French
Mauraaal it's a mute E like in 'en face de' or 'connasse'
mdr! good one!
I am French. Coup de grâce is pronounced "koo duh grass".
I seriously love dnd stories like this.
you should review the neverwinter nights games.
My party and I were walking for about two months to get from one town to another, and along the way we encountered about thirteen kobolds. I was a aasimar paladin, and we had a half-elf wizard (who was useless), an elf alchemist (who was worse), and the GMPC Pegasus Ranged Fighter(who only participated in combat). The wizard suggests (mostly to get out of combat) that they send their strongest to fight our strongest (which was me). DM makes a unique Kobold for the occasion and it is quite literally the hardest fight I have ever had. I repeatedly rolled ones or twos, missing each time and the kobold was a barbarian that was just wailing on me. Eventually I roll a three (I have some serious adds to hit) which put me at over twenty to hit, and one hit killed the enemy.
it hurt so much you say it the way to say coup de grace and its not near how you say it haha
you wanna know the most fun part about a coup de grace?
in portuguese it sounds like "ass for free"
so everytime anyone tells the right way of saying it...everyone laughs
I can confirm this hahaha
"cu de graça"
Simon Boudreault he just had to mix both to make the right way to say it haha
Charles jai aucun probleme as sire ce mot la cest juste la facon jares le dit ca me tue haha
Killed a party member with a flying large sized animated object bear trap. It had the grab ability and kept flying upward till he broke out and fell over 200 feet taking the full 20d6. What he didn't know is it was taking him somewhere to be captured (and rescued probably) so he kept trying to escape and eventually succeeded to his detriment. Fell into a farm stead and ruined the families dinner, as well as traumatized their children.
What is it with English speakers that can't pronounce "coup de grâce" properly? If you'd say it like "coo de grass" you would be the closest to the French pronunciation without sounding weird at all.
Fenrick Marlowe I pronounce it "coup de grâce", with the emphasis on the "a". Basically, how a Brit might pronounce "grass".
EDIT: Yeah, exactly the way you commented. XD
Well, just taking a shot in the dark here, but maybe it's because English is their primary/only language, so they might fuck up simple sayings in other languages? That answer should've been obvious.
Hyperforeignism. The short version is that languages follow different rules, and when you don't understand the rules, that includes not only ignoring them completely (like pronouncing it "koop duh grase") but then overcorrecting by saying it how the English speaker merely thinks French sounds. Probably because a handful of French loanwords (so not all of them) are properly pronounced by leaving out (in English) would be the final consonant sound (ballet, Louis, etc.).
Otaku At long last, a fellow knowledgable vocabulary stickler has arrived to accompany me!
+Porter Ewing
Apparently not enough of a stickler; I have been mispronouncing "coup de grâce" my entire life, only learning of my mistake after this exchange led me to look it up. XD
The first time I ever played DnD I picked a rogue. We played the sample mission to get our feet wet that day. We kicked open the door to a shack which should have been a surprise round, but we weren't sneaky enough. I leapt through the door thinking we surprised the goblins. They surprised me by being in ambush on either side of the door, clubbing me in the head and killing me instantly. The first door. Of my career. Dead.
Technically the most embarrassing was when my character committed suicide at the end of a one-shot (he was undead already so he wanted eternal rest) only for the GM to announce that that was the closest he'd come to every character surviving that scenario.
Jack' Elliott Oops
I was running Dragon of Icespire Peak for some friends and they were exploring the Dwarf ruins at 3rd level. As they were creeping through the catacombs, at some point they got their marching order mixed up and the Monk and Fighter were locked in a heated battle of "after you," "no, after you!" The Artificer, trying to be sassy, paraded through with an "after me" and walked right into the sneak attack of an Ochre Jelly. The thing hit her with
19 bludgeon/acid damage and she went straight to zero HP. I think I could have prevented this, instead of just hoping she would make her death saves (she did not).
She got better though.
Now, I don't have a story about an embarrassing coup-de-grace, but I do have a win-story that basically boils down to the fighter getting paralyzed by The Bogeyman, which let the monster coup-de-grace him. However, the fighter actually manages to weather through the horrible experience of not being able to move as The Bogeyman digs through his innards - he made the absurd roll thanks to his strong fortitude and lives long enough for his friends to back him up and beat the monster. Such a tense moment.
In the first time I played D&D, my friends and I had the 5e starter kit. So we all make character, and I'm playing as a Dwarven Claric. We get into our VERY FIRST combat. We're just making our way to the nearest town and we find an abandoned cart, horses dead, driver dead. Then we're ambushed by a few goblins. Everyone engages, I cast a cantrip or two. Then, one of the goblins shoots the cart, dislodges it from where it was, and makes it roll down the hill at us. Dex saving throw to evade. I, a dwarf in heavy armor and a -1 to my dex modifier, am directly in the path. I roll... a 1. It hits me for full force and does twice my health.
And that was the first time I lost a character in that campaign. We'd been playing for 30 minutes. I'd go on to lose 2 more before we stopped playing. Mostly my own fault, though one was a heroic sacrifice at the very end, so it was worth it. Mortally wounded, bleeding out, no more spell, my hammer flung off of the top of the tower when I was disarmed. I grabbed the big bad arch wizard guy and dragged him off the tower with me, killing us both. Totally bad ass.
I have a similar story. I was also playing starter kit, and it was like my third D&D game, as I had done two one-shots a few months ago. I was playing the wizard with an acolyte background. This background is important. Our party also got ambushed by goblins. I got shot a few times with arrows, and was at 3 hp. On my next turn, I decided to take out my acolyte stuff and pray to my god for healing. At this time, I thought acolyte came with healing powers like cleric, because I wasn't completely sure of the difference between backgrounds and classes mechanically. So I prayed to my god for healing (the dm made me roll a d20 to see what would {or wouldn't} happen), and nothing happened, except I was kneeling and vulnerable. The goblins shot me again, but I still had 1 hp left. I chugged a healing potion, and got back in the fight. A round later, I was back to 1 hp. I prayed for healing, and looked like an idiot. I was convinced I was just rolling poorly. The goblins fired at me again, missing. I prayed for healing again, saying in-character (unfortunately), "I pray to my god for hee-ee-ea-ling!"no kidding, my character called the god he worshipped "my god" as he prayed for healing. Anyways, I rolled a 19, and even with bonuses, nothing happened. A goblin then shot me through the throat, as I was repeating the same dumb sentence. I then failed all my death saves, while before each one ooc saying "I pray to my god for healing!". Now that sentence is a group inside joke
My most unlucky death (triple 20 for the enemy and one failed dodge): A random evil guard is close to death, the group was stomping the encounter. I am a lvl 2 rogue archer 10 meters away. As a desperation attack, the guard throw his 2-handed-sword at me. Strength check for range: 20. Hit check: 20. Confirmation roll: 20. Facing the horror, the DM allows me a dodge/reflex check: 3.
I died to a greatsword thrown in my face by underpaid evil guard #207.
Anyone else reminded of Spoony's infamous "Leaping Wizards" story because of this? The one where a group of lvl 1 wizards in AD&D--who only get one spell per day--basically owned an uber party with multiple clerics by putting a lot of them to sleep, charming the fighter, and bashing a lot of heads in with their quarterstaffs?
3.5 d&d dwarf cleric of moradin. died 10 minutes into the session. misjudged how hard climbing down a sea cliff was. forgot to take off armor first and drowned when he fell into the ocean.
The fist death of a player we had while playing the introductory game of D&D 4.0, the Hall of kobolds, I think it was named. We had an archer ranger who decided that he would go all in, front line against the kobolds in an open room. It just happened that the floor had trigger tiles that activated traps, so after he got shot everywhere by darts coming from hidden holes in the walls and a couple attacks from the kobolds in the next turn he got all his hitpoints out falling on the floor dying. One of my friends, a warrior armed with a flail ran in front of him (taking care not to step on the trap) and with all his might shouted at the kobolds and gave a speech about how they were going to protect their fallen comerade. Tries to do some sort of attack to a kobold next to him. Rolls a 1. The DM says that his flail slips from his hands, and after a check on what was going to happen after, the flail fell right on top of the ranger, dealing coup de grace damage, efectively killing him. And that's the story of how our friend lost his first character, the first time we played 4.0
The following games we noticed our player that had the ranger, was cursed, because at one point in time during our games we realized that he had more characters dead that sessions we have played. It was a fun time
thanks for sharing, Jared! I loved every embarrassing death I witnessed you have so far
I can't like this enough. I'm being coup de graced by my laughter
Ok so this isn't a death but I think it's worth mentioning. About 2 weeks ago I was playing with about 4 of my friends. We came across a goblin camp that was being guarded by 2 goblins. We easily took the both of them down but one of our party members spoke goblin so we took one alive. I just cast thorn whip and tied him up. All of the sudden one party member runs out of a bush ( he was playing a dragonborn ) and tries to kick him in the gonads. He rolled a natural 20 and the goblin went 10 feet in the air. The dm was laughing so hard. I felt so bad I healed his wounds and he now helps us.
I have a story that might also be the fastest ever character death in a game of D&D.
The game had just started, it was a 2nd edition campaign and started with the old fashioned "you all meet up at a bar" intro. Anyway the wizard of the party decided to talk to an NPC at the bar and the chat didn't go well at all. The wizard insulted the NPC and started a brawl...or well it would have been a brawl but the NPC hit the wizard in the face with a bottle and scored a crit, killing him instantly. The game hadn't even been going for 20 minutes and there was a player death, it was hilarious.
most embarrassing death in a campaign I'm running was when our sorcerer torched a mummy lord killing it instantly. Admittedly, I hadn't thought that maybe a creature with Fire Weakness would be little challenge to the son of an ancient red dragon
I don't get how you died.
I am assuming hellothisismuffin was the DM, and the Mummy Lord was meant to pose as a challenge for the players. So TECHNICALLY since the DM is effectively the "bad guys," That is a rather silly death for one of their characters they stuck in to try to hinder the protagonists. Just kindof an "O-oh... wait.. oops. *ded*" moment haha
Luigi4evernevermario That makes more sense now, thanks!
I had a really cool rooftop chase scene through a town with three hulking, undead-but-sentient guards on my tail. Just as I landed on a roof that was a really far leap and one of them landed right behind me, I turned, did a feet-first slide right between his legs and off the edge of the roof, hooking my grappling hook around one of his ankles as I passed.
Used him to rappel far enough down the side to fall without getting hurt, tugged as I did so to yank him off with me and the impact of landing killed him. The other two guards didn't have a quick way down, giving me time to slip into the crowd and escape.
In 3.5, my friend killed a gigantic monster terrorizing a town by throwing rocks at it.
He was a Paladin.
I used Magic Stone.
Fortunately enough, my friend had a proficiancy with rocks.
I once had a very self-aware depressing bard who inspired people by making depressing quips about life. I once used cutting words and simply asked what's the point of living. It was the killing blow to a dwarf and he proceeded to kill himself with his own dagger.