People Are SO Wrong About This Situation
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- Опубліковано 11 лип 2024
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Chadchad put it very succinctly when she tweeted: "9 years is a long time to y'all until it's the age gap between Tana and CodyKo."
🔥 fire
@@krixkhaos does she have OF? I want to support sex workers through direct mutual aid and simpsolidarity.
absolutely STUPID of that one commenter to say "Tana was an adult woman at 17 and she should be treated like an adult" while at the same time saying "cody was immature so he clearly couldn't do anything wrong" girl help
the infantilization of men is not talked about enough tbh
i know it drives me insaneeeee
They just hate women lmao
When I was 17 I was told that I'm very mature for my age and the guy who was interested in me (5 years older than me) is super immature, so "it evens out" and I should really give him a chance. Disgusting how that's even an argument
gross double standard
"Why would she ruin his life"
He did it. He did ruin his life. He did sleep with a minor.
I don't know why people don't get that.
exactly!!! if just pointing at something someone else did ruines their life, maybe they shouldnt have done it in the first place
How dare she hold him responsible for the CRIME HE COMMITTED against her?
Oh thought she said she was 17/ 18.
Doesn't seem to upset about it in vid w shane. Seems proud.
25 is def not a man. Btw
Is 17 and 25 in the US a crime?
When I was 17 I had sex with a women which was 23 or 24. Was she a criminal?
"She's doing this for her own benefit" as if any woman, famous or not, has ever benefited from making allegations like this against a well-liked man, like, ever
Also as if she isn't rich, famous, successful on her own. 😭
@@TheAbigailDeeyeah, they pretty much have the same number of subscribers as well... So it's not like she's taking pot shots at someone who has a significantly larger audience than she does... they are kind of at the same level, in current day. That points towards her NOT doing it solely for clout and to gain new subscribers because she's already extremely successful... she doesn't need more subscribers, necessarily. She's doing completely fine with the number that she has now.
A game I play when people say that women claim to be victims for clout is to ask them to name 3 of Bill Cosby’s victims and they never can
This, I don't remember any case where a woman actually benefited from this
They absolutely did hun. Have you never been on the internet?
How is it that some people can acknowledge thay James Charles teying to sleep with/date/get sexual photos from minors when he was under 25 (he is 25 now) is obviously predatory, but a 25 year old man having sex with a 17 year old is not actual predatory behavior. What. The. Actual. Fuck.
To be clear, James Charles also displayed predatory behaviour. Key word: also
Also! Cody had way more info on Tana at his disposal!
People need to realize that no one becomes "mature for their age" because of all the positive things happening to them. If a child seems grown up, it's because trauma forced adulthood on them.
homophobia
homophobia and double standards most likely
@@coolchameleon21I wouldn't say homophobia per se, but it's undeniable how normalized that behavior is for straight people compared to queer people.
People didn't jump on his situation exclusively because he's a gay man, but because on average, people aren't primed to do the mental gymnastics of allowing such behavior for queer people.
@@anothercub6958 i mean that’s just a form of homophobia. a predisposition to view queer people as predators is homophobia
As someone who got preyed on by older men in high school and was called a slut for it repeatedly my heart breaks for her
I’m so sorry that happened to you. No one deserves that. I wish you all good things 💗💗💗
same. it’s so common. idk why teenage girls get treated like adults even by other women
@@abbyz13 so incredibly glossed over it shakes my soul
Tana has definitely gotten on my nerves in the past but this has made me much more sympathetic to her. Especially the part about “so many worse things have happened to me. Just lately at 39 I am *really* thinking about how fucked up it was losing my virginity at 16 to my nearly 26 year old boyfriend. Wtf. I just hope that people speaking up prevents another generation of girls from experiencing things like this.
What’s crazy is being a guy in highschool and the girl you like is fucking a 25yo
People complaining about her coming forward now is absolutely disgusting. There’s no statute of limitations for dealing with trauma.
It is disgusting. They would've complained anyway if Tana was speaking out on what Cody did at that time as well. People need to stop victim blaming
Yep. Sometimes it takes a lifetime to let oneself come to term with trauma. This is so challenging and I honestly resonate with how Tana talked about it - because she has to cope.
She never said it was traumatic, guys. 😂
@knoelle1357 Yeah, she never said it but it's still inappropriate what Cody did to her and it should be called out
it’s actually more likely that time to process what you went through is WHY you can finally see it as traumatic. when we are 17 we’re not going to assume adults have these awful intentions but when you grow up you learn the hard way
even if the sex was consensual and tana has no negative feelings towards cody ko, he was still 25 choosing to sleep with a 17 year old. i'm 25 years old right now and i literally can't even imagine sleeping with a 17 year old. he should have known better and it's not a situation where it makes sense to expect him to not know better
I'm 22 and I can't imagine doing that either
and the power dynamic. Wasn't she a fan??
Its inherently non consensual by proxy of her age.
I’m 23, and I can’t imagine being with someone under 21. 17 is a baby
I’m guessing you’re a women / female identifying because women are way smarter about age boundaries than men are. I too would never sleep with a 17 year old at 29. So many men think 16-17 is totally fine as 25+. I’m glad people are seeing a problem with it because a 17!year old no matter the gender is not responsible enough to make those decisions.
everyone's a feminist until someone you like does the bad thing, I hate it. Some people are just untouchable unfortunately
Exactly. When I saw Abby Shapiro being sexualized, I got grossed out. Even when that picture of a guy posing with a sexualized cake I was like 🤮
His wife is apparently fair game too. His baby is as well. Misogyny is more rampant than anyone wants to admit.
@@luxuscarnage4828 Yep
It also goes for everyone's a feminist until someone they don't like is a victim.
@luxuscarnage4828 i don't see anyone blaming his wife for the stupid things he did though?
saying that a 17 year old girl being on drugs and going to clubs justifies the situation is insane to me. like how could a 17yo being on drugs make her more capable of consenting?? these mental gymnastics should be featured in the Olympic games
Exactly! Why is it 17 and going to clubs/doing drugs acceptable for Tana but 25 and doing the same things "young, dumb, didn't know better" for Cody?
yup!! so much of the hate towards her rn goes like
"i've never even heard tana speak about this herself but here's my opinion anyway-" and then they list a bunch of things that make her more susceptible to abuse, as if they're reasons why she could never be victimized
Demi Lovato's song "29" is basically about this. She had a very public relationship with Wilmer Valderrama that started when she was 17 and he was 29, and it was ✨consensual✨and ✨happy✨. The chorus goes:
" *Finally twenty-nine* / *Funny, just like you were at the time* / Thought it was a teenage dream, just a fantasy / But was it yours or was it mine? [...] Finally twenty-nine / *Seventeen would never cross my mind* / Thought it was a teenage dream, a fantasy / But it was yours, it wasn't mine"
Wilmer has a whole ass laundry list of minors he messed around with. And a lot people knew and did nothing. The world is crazy
This has a similar feeling to Taylor Swift rerecording the song Dear John at age 32, which was the age John Mayer was when she originally recorded the song about their breakup - at 19 years old.
@@siobhan_is_onI think that relationship is probably why as a young adult she also pursued relationships with younger men, although never with such an extreme age gap.
She thought what happened to her was normal or the negative parts of it were nothing to do with the age gap when they very much were.
Someone doesn't have to be completely unproblematic to come forward about abuse. The "perfect victim" nonsense needs to go straight to hell. Most victims wouldn't fit that perfect trope.
they expect her to look like a walking dead character with blood and bruises and her hair "messed up" and clothes ripped off and wearing sandals all the time. that's the PERFECT victim or else= you lie. what people.
@@sumatrannos no but then you're probably on drugs so you can't be trusted
Truth! 👏👏
💯💯💯
@@sumatrannos And she better acted like a docile angel and didn't fight back. And HE better be some weird-looking unknown freak and social outcast with zero loved ones, who preyed on her from behind a bush. If he's known and beloved, then there's no way people will side with her.
Really grinds my gears when people tell victims what they can and can't do with their own trauma. Oh no! She doesn't fit your perfect mold of what a victim should be and how they should act? That doesn't invalidate what happened to them!
Sorry, no.
You can cope with your trauma however it helps but I've seen "I've got trauma" used to justify abusing other people in the past. Someone being abused does not give you the right to abuse others.
@@massivedamagegaming9004 Okay, let's agree to OP's statement barring victims becoming victimizers (even though it should go without saying and you're purposefully being obstuse), how is the Tana situation being used to justify her own shitty behavior? Is Tana abusing Cody by talking about her situation?
Kinda grinds my gears when people call people victims that dont say they themselves are victims, especially telling them that they were r*ped.
@@lucaleone4331ok so if a 15yo doesn’t ‘feel victimized’ by their 25yo partner then there’s nothing wrong? also FL and CA have 18yo age of consent laws WHICH LEGALLY MAKES THIS R4PE
@@ratgurl1 did it happen in California/ Florida? If it happened. I haven't see any evidence beyond her accusations and accusations are not evidence.
well if she was supposed to know it was wrong at 17. wasnt he supposed to know even better that it was wrong at 25? he was older and therefore it was his responsibility to not do that.
I hate the narrative that teenagers are “seductresses”. I remember as a teen, attention from older guys made me feel special, mature, and important. I thought that there must be something interesting and special about me. I wasn’t luring guys in, they were sneaking into my life in a predatory way, telling me how intelligent and mature I was, making me feel like there was more to me than I could see in myself. They knew what they were doing, meanwhile I thought someone cared about me in a meaningful way. Men get confused because sex is so paramount in their brains over anything else. I am so sad for my teenage self with the amount of mix-CDs I stayed up meticulously crafting, where every song had some kind of personal meaning or a reference to a memory within the relationship. Those guys knew I was a naive, love struck little idiot. It’s the reason why so many hebephiles gravitate towards teens. I worshipped those men. As an adult, I’m disgusted and embarrassed at how stupid I was, because if they had half a brain, they knew I was incredibly immature and I had nothing truly meaningful to offer them.
@@jilllime3824 luckily i never received any attention from older guys as a teen. i had no sense of style which prolly saved me xD
@@jilllime3824 I can very much relate to your comment. 💗
I had friends in middle school who bragged about men at least a decade older than us calling them jailbait. They felt it was a badge of honor that showed that they were more mature than the other people their age. Looking back, it's disgusting. At the time, we just laughed it off and thought it was normal.
@@KatzeWire girls need to be taught that that type of attention isn't normal or flattering. It's creepy af
when tana expressed how people are being very "what was she wearing" about it, i got pissed and she is so right. FUCKKKK people saying "oh but it's tana mongeau" AND!???!!?
them bringing up that it's tana as a rebuttal is hilarious. like for starters, it's very public information that tana's childhood is riddled w abuse and exploitation (at the hands of adults around her)... so yeah, great, he took advantage of someone that would be extraordinarily easy to exploit. it's also been public information since the beginning of her career that she moved out of her parents home almost immediately and had began renting her own places as young as 15 - if anything, it being tana should add LEVITY to the claims (given the fact that she's never lied abt smn this serious and has been vocal in calling out all of these freaks in recent years; nobody had much of an issue believing her until it came to cody).
then there's the fact that tana (at that time) wouldve encompassed a large majority of cody's audience - young, teenaged girls. not to throw out more accusations wo evidence, but i wouldnt be too surprised if he's done this before and neither should anyone else
It's like whenever these things happen those people pull up a list of requirements that the victim must have in order for them to empathize.
People are so soup brained. If anything, the "its tana" excuse should be an even better evidence for this happening to her! People who followed tana are aware of how toxic and fkked up her life as a teenager was, girls like her are easy to exploit by older men cause they're neglected.
let's think about this objectively here. Tana is already a horrible role model for anyone and everyone. She's just using this story to help her own career. Cody Ko is the real victim in this situation
@@lamspam hey: no
You made perfect sense in what you were trying to say! A woman doesn’t have to be broken from an experience to have it be wrong. We are allowed to be resilient and/or feel ok and STILL have been taken advantage of.
This is the best response honestly, instead of everyone pushing the situation to extremes (of either end)
Also, wouldn't you rather victims not be traumatized so they can live and heal properly?? Why would people need someone's life to be completely ruined before they can take it seriously? It's always the waiting till it escalates thing.
Reminds me a lot of how people are victim blaming Demi Lovato for being groomed by Wilmer Valderrama when they were 17 and he was 29, some even claiming they're just trying to ruin his life because he's getting married.
Or people maligning Kristen Stewart for “cheating” on Robert Pattinson as teenagers when she was being taken advantage of by an adult male director. Like no, guys, she was getting broomed
Im not that educated on this, but Aaliyah and R. Kelly.
@@roxassora2706I’m still bitter about this years later. Aaliyah, bless her heart, deserved better. Everyone mentioned here deserved better.
@@boogiebear3095 Fr. And as a kinky gal, peeing on a kid is weird. And I have some kinks involving human bodily fluids myself. And I'm young enough to remember watching iCarly with barely any weird feeling. I just thought they were funny jokes, but having been to that environment? Nah.
That and Johnny Depp was with Winona Ryder when she was seventeen and he was twenty-six. 😬
You know what else is legal in some states? Child marriage. As in a grown as adult man can marry a child. Does that make it morally okay?
Those commenters suck.
It's all of our states. Or was all 50 five-ish years ago. I saw it on an interactive board at an event. It gave options for answers and none of them were correct. After you revealed they were wrong it displays that all 50 states allow it. The stand had info on some laws coming up for voting to combat this in that state.
It’s so mind boggling! Like just bc you can doesn’t mean you should!???! The commenters were giving severe brain rot
THANK YOU!! the amount of people who think that shit is okay are so predatory i swear
Legality does not equal morality.
I hate this common narrative that if a woman talks publicly about what has happened to her, it's somehow all about the guy. "Why is she talking now and not earlier if it truly happened/was that bad?" "She must have an agenda" "she just wants him cancelled" "she just wants to ruin his life". Maybe she just wants to process HER life and HE is not the center of the goddamn universe? "Oh but she shouldn't have named him if she didn't want this to be about him" horseshit. If I name an abusive person when talk about my past, it doesn't mean that I'm only talking about my past to go after said person. This idea that the only reason to talk about past sexual abuse is to find the person who is quilty needs to die.
Especially when it actually makes a ton of sense that she'd talk about it when she reached the age HE was when he did what he did to her, and she reflected and realized that in her mid-20's, she'd NEVER think about sleeping with a 17-year-old. It's like how the year I turned the age my aunt was when she died, I suddenly felt really weird. Not the same at all, I know, but it's the same kind of deal where you realize, "Oh shit, I'm the same age now. My perspective is suddenly weird."
@@wmhfv992i always think of demi lovato’s song 29 ‘finally 29 funny just like you were at the time’ and ‘finally 29, 17 would never cross my mind’ especially
Men problem.
Thats why.
M are at fault.
Well, and people guessing at her reason, when she said her reason OUT LOUD. She was asked a question on stage, answered it, and then when people noticed, she realized she maybe shouldn't just say stuff without thinking. After thinking about it, she decided just to address it on the podcast to get her OWN thoughts and feelings out about it. I'm so sick of people not listening to women. She can say why it came out, why she's talking about it, give a list of reasons, and people will STILL act like it's so mysterious, and must be for clout...
Yeah it's kinda annoying, she literally said why she's addressing it and all of those are good reasons. It's not even just about her, but that she realises how normalized and systemic predatory behavior is, and how it will impact younger people. Her approach is mature and self aware.
It's not even about this guy, but he clearly made it about him when he asked her 'hey we good?' Like he doesn't seem to acknowledge that he made at least a mistake (in reality commited a crime), and that since everyone of his fans is making it about him, he should at least take responsibility and set an example - that it's not ok to do what he did. If he's a father now, shouldn't he think about these things? I swear some men never mature past adolescence in their mind..
Another instance of people claiming to support victims, but when the person isn't a perfect victim and accusing someone the public THINKS they know, suddenly those same people start victim blaming. We gotta inform the public on parasocial relationships.
I think it's safe to assume that people who have that kind of dissonance just don't support victims, period.
@@anothercub6958 yeah. That's my point.
Totally!
those comments really pissed me off. if the first thought that comes to your mind is the legal age of consent during discussions like these, you are suspect asf.
Those people need to take a seat for the reasons you mention, and also the fact that the age of consent is 18 in California anyway (as it should be to protect teenagers from grown assholes like this).
Check their hardrives
Tana makes a great point at 25:00- it would be easier if he were “more hatable” and that’s exactly what makes people like Cody so frightening. You want to believe they’re so good they couldn’t possibly do something like that.
I think also there is this element of milkshake duck burnout for lack of a better term. People are growing weary of people they assumed to be decent and good human beings having nefarious shit they've done come to light over and over and over again. That said, they don't need to take their inability to manage those feelings of disappointment and frustration over the world being a lot more fucked up than they previously imagined, and make it the problem of the victim coming forward. Because when they shove their heads in the sand and continue to support these people anyway, that's exactly what they are doing.
that's why people try to call out when people are being weirdly parasocial. like it might seem like being negative or what ever when a comment goes off about "omg you're so nice, you guys are perfect" or what ever, and people responde with " calm down, you don't know them, this is the internet and they are putting on a face, stop being parasocial" i do think kind of often becaus ei think it' simportant to snap people out of it.
feels similar to the David Dobrik situation before that finally unravelled. people didn't want to believe it because he was seemingly nice and giving away cars and shit
Definitely agree. Commentary channels and the internet at large will always go so hard against lolcows and generally already hated people who are revealed to be sex criminals, but the moment the white boy of the week does it people are quick to make excuses or sweep it under the rug.
And that's part of why her accusations doesn't go anywhere. Not only is he so likeable. She is very dislikeable.
FYI, her podcast is 9th in the world, she doesn't need clout imo. Meanwhile he's doing flop button reacts.
Thank you for pointing this out I had no idea. I was somewhat aware of this drama unfolding but noticed the stress is showing on Cody's face in all the recent thumbnails on those react videos
@@stephe1506I’ve read on his reddit sub that he’s into gambling/ bets. Which (I assume) is why the quantity has gone up and the quality of his content has gone down the drain. But this situation can’t be helping, which is, I think, the reason he tries to ignore and wait it out
Bad point since everyone in their mother has a podcast now so the fact her podcast is ninth doesn't mean much
@@thuglifeinc4894 ...if everyone has a podcast then hers being ninth in the world is, in fact an achievement
@@stephe1506I always thought that having a child was the reason for everyday content. Nothing wrong with that
I hooked up with a guy at 18 who was in his late 20s. He knew me since I was 14 and he even admitted he was just waiting till I turned 18. I thought it was so sweet at the time. Now I realize how messed up that it.
For a man to be guilty, he has to have never done a single thing right. For a woman to be believed, she has to have never done a single thing wrong.
when i told my brother about it he was like "well everyone slept with tana when she was seventeen" it was super disappointing
eww :/
that's so gross that that was even going on??? like the fact that more people did this disgusting thing doesn't make it less disgusting, i just feel bad for tana
"yeah so what, the victim is even more of a victim" he doesn't even realize what he's saying lmfao
As if that makes it better?? Like hello ?? "He wasn't the only one that abused her" like um
I guess he's just not surprised. I'm not either tbh. Hopefully he doesn't condone it though because I certainly don't.
It's interesting how people accuse women of trying to ruin a man's career or reputation with allegations when it's very clear allegations do not always end careers. Even after proven allegations, confessions, guilty verdicts. Making allegations can pull your whole life into scrutiny, especially when dealing with high profile figures.
I’d go further than “allegations do not always end careers” and say that allegations almost NEVER end careers. Even when the misconduct is more than allegations because there’s strong evidence. Even in situations where the perpetrator has themselves admitted to the behaviour. Donald Trump is running for president again, Louis CK is back touring, Kevin Spacey even is making a comeback. “Cancel culture” does not exist for powerful men who refuse to be cancelled. They just keep on going and they continue to garner support from thousands or even millions of fans
yeah like a woman making an claim does not get them more popularity. it gets the fucking hate beams pointed at them. and the types of incels who hate women that make claims like that, they dont ever go away. support fades, peoples hate doesn't really. the angry people will make a point to comment every time they see her face show up.
Yessssss. I've had to drop someone over recent accusations about another powerful man, because she keeps going on about false allegations ruining lives and how she knows a guy who had that happen - but nothing was ever proved either way so she's going on her personal feelings about the guy.
Every. Single. Person. Who has reported an assault (or told people around them, because only about 1/3 report things) has been accused of lying. Every. One.
When it involves someone famous, sure a portion of their audience might unsubscribe or stop buying their work or whatever, but "cancel culture" is basically a myth - and half of these people (especially in industries other than UA-cam) end up with a BIGGER audience/ fandom when they start talking out about cancel culture.
If a person’s career is ruined because minors ✨exist✨they didn’t deserve the good faith
exactly.
I’m 21 and I don’t even like talking to 17 year olds. Like they’re children to me, fully grown adults who go after teenagers are so creepy
Fr I'm 24 and my younger sibling is 16 and teenagers are actually so annoying to be around I can't fathom being interested in anyone that age in any way
I think USA 🦅 people only really become adults at 35.
The only reason people don't acknowledge it, is it is blindingly obvious they are supposed to mature faster.
In the USA 🦅, I feel like
@@artlessthief and that's what makes it predatory and not actual love! because children are easy to control!
also can we talk about how LOW the bar is for men? this is like the fourth time I see a situation where if the man had admited to it and publicly apologized then it would be over, that's literally what so many of us want: them taking responsability and apologizing. Not even justice. And still women don't get even that
yeah it makes me think it really is all men
@@kalpic11Like we know it's not all men, but it is enough to make one think that.
@@roxassora2706and beloved men at that too. Ones you wouldn’t think are creeps but take advantage anyway
thank you for talking about this, Rachel. it's honestly disturbing the lack of coverage it's been receiving.
Sadly I feel like UA-cam have been supressing discussion around it - using either of these content creator's names in the title / video tags gets the video immediately demonetised (and therefore not recommended to people) and since I started researching the topic I'm being recommended a lot of HIS content of stuff like his wife talking about their wedding / baby, but not any about THIS situation at all.
@@RachelOatesthis!! the platform’s golden boy shan’t be chastised. well too bad, we’re sticking up for young girls in 2024
@@RachelOateshe hasnt addressed it. And you are also just taking her word for everything. Theres is actually no proof and you havent even heard anything from him. Nothing from the other side.
i'll put this this way. I watch a lot of commentators..... IDK who this content creator is.... and yet this is the only thing ive seen about this. that's crazy.
@@alyssaheller7860 idk if you know this, but, proof that you've had sec with someone is pretty fucking difficult unless you start recording every time you've done it. like unless they texted about it before or something like that theres not much else, so if they hooked up "spur of the moment" or what ever (yes i know that's gross to say in this but im refering from Tanas POV) . not likely they have anything, and what is someone supposed to do, just stay silent forever about it?
and on the flip side it's difficult for cody ko to prove against the allegation unless there is a recording of like, her coming onto him and him rejecting her.... it's literally a lose lose situation.
im 25 currently and 17 is literally an age of *students* i've had (in my internship, but still), the notion of hearing someone is 17 and still having any form of sexual and/or romantic interest to me is unthinkable! i understand that in a youtubers context they would see each other as something closer to coworkers, but the age difference is still what it is, a 17 year old with a job still has only been alive for 17 years and no circumstances change that
Like their age gap was half her age 😭
I'm like 19 and I don't feel like I could sleep woth a 17 yr old-it's just so icky. I was 17 like 2 yrs ago and yet the gap in maturity and everything feels so wide.
I’m 21 years old and a cashier at a grocery store and most of my cashier coworkers are sixteen to seventeen years old and I could never imagine being romantically interested in any of them. It’s just gross.
Exactly the circumstances may be different but the AGE doesn’t change the way you put it is great: they’ve still only been alive on this earth for 17 years or less 🤮those adults who prey on teens and kids are doing it because of the power imbalance in their favor and it should have huge or lifetime prison times not these slap on the wrist sentences they give out. Tana is right it is the whole world and not only her industry because she validated people everywhere with that reframing. We must do better to protect people from these patterns repeating over and over and end the cycles.
i always had an odd feeling about them. like yes they’re funny but for example they always called women “females” on their podcast. the way they talked about women… like you said it often had a misogynistic undertone. i eventually stopped watching them altogether.
I've only seen a couple of Cody's videos a few years ago, and he immediately gave me a weird vibe. It was based on nothing other than my gut feeling, but I just knew that one day something would come out about him. I didn't expect anything like this though.
The "misogynistic undertone" is such a perfect description to what I saw too! I followed Cody and their podcast channel for a long time and then gradually stopped watching at all. The breaking point for me was when they were talking and laughing about the Titan submersible tragedy on one of the podcast episodes. I was sick to my stomach when people all over social media were laughing about the deaths of rich people as if they deserved it. And then seeing them succumb to the same "edgy" humor... I unfollowed immediately.
I also stopped watching Cody a while ago because I got tired of catching whiffs of misogyny
This is very interesting! I never had any weird vibes from Cody’s video. I find them very light and entertaining. It worries me that I haven’t perceived what you mention😦
They don't? They have when imitating the "Reddit" guy, but i am very certain that is not how they generally regard women and i have seen 80% of their podcasts (just not the past year). Not saying they cant be misogynists or anything related to these allegations, but this particular inference is just not factual
I was assaulted at 14 and it took me 8 years to process it. I believe Tana.
That's such a typical frat boy behavior. Even if tana was 18, preying on someone so young, vulnerable and going through difficult times is just so wrong. And he had the audacity to make some content commenting on predatory men in hollywood. The cognitive dissonance is deafening 🙄
It's only as I've gotten older that I realized how messed up it was that men in their 30s were with me when I was 16.
i unsubbed from cody’s channels immediately after finding out and today i finally unsubbed from kelsey as well, i used to watch TMG and cody all the time but started to grow out of it a couple years ago and this incident was the final push i needed to be fully done with them
I've grew out of them for over a good year, I suppose... kudos to you to step away from them. I find it incredulous that something like this is swept under the rug. It's not okay.
Yeah I get ya. I grew out of them years ago but unsubbed recently because of this
Guess accusations are all you all need to turn on someone. You dont even bother to wait to hear from the other side or look for any independent evidence.
@@alyssaheller7860 I searched mine and read several articles. And if this was so wrong and untrue, why hasn’t he addressed it? I’d clarify if someone publicly stated that I slept with them when they were a minor and in a questionable circumstance.
@@alyssaheller7860i’d expect this type of comment from a man, but it’s absolutely pathetic coming from another woman. sad
I applaud Tana for how eloquently she’s speaking about this, and I’m proud of you for covering it. People seem to be all over it on Reddit but I am shocked at how little anybody is talking about it over here.
Of course he was a frat boy. Wouldn’t expect any less.
The person at 32:06 really reminds me a lot of the main character in Lolita. "Women are very manipulative and know exactly how weak men are and how lust can work in their favor" and "she seems more in control of the interactions" and such, feels very reminiscent of how Humbert makes excuses about how Dolores was seductive and SHE was going after HIM. Disgusting! Even if the child does want it and is pursuing the adult, that DOES NOT MAKE IT OKAY for the adult to take advantage! It's their responsibility to reject the child!
Yes! I’ve spoken in plenty of videos before about the huge issue I have with people who romanticise Lolita and see it as a ‘tragic love story’ and this just feels like the real life version of that. Lolita was a child - she didn’t manipulate or seduce anyone. Same with real victims.
It's usually the specific adult grooming the specific child that leads to it in the first place. Of course a child will act the way the adult trains them to. They are a child and are unaware of the full picture. They think the person in front of them loves them, thinks they're different than others. It's all a part of the same disgusting actions of adults towards children. I thought the 21 year old grown man that was touching my 15 year old body was my first love. I thought what he was doing was love. Showing me love. Loving me. I cried when he left me. I thought he broke my heart. Except when I processed it and was 21 myself, I was horrified. All I could possibly see a 15 year old as was a child. A baby. Yeah, at the time I was not crying and calling my mommy, and fighting back. I welcomed him with open arms. Because he groomed me to. He groomed me to do so with every grown man after him.
I hope this super thanks helps even though this video is demonetized. I'm so sorry you're being unfairly punished by UA-cam for trying to bring awareness about these disgusting UA-camrs who deserve to be deplatformed. This is why one of Onision's victims is suing UA-cam/Google right now because UA-cam is protecting alleged predators.
Onision has been getting away with unforgivable and disgusting shit for 12 YEARS. I know all of his channels been demonetized but it's not enough because he's still trying to silence creators by false flagging their videos calling him out.
UA-cam also did nothing about SSSniperwolf doxxing Jacksfilms home and Jacksfilms ended up quitting UA-cam and somehow Sniperwolf still has a platform.
In this situation, I believe Tana. People can have their opinions on who Tana is as a person but at the end of the day, she still is a victim and she should be believed. She was 17 and Cody was 25.
I'm just sad that UA-cam is letting this crap happen to where creators who are trying to do the right thing and spread awareness end up getting punished for no reason but allowing the toxic ones to keep their platform and continue to get away with whatever the hell they want.
I hope one of Onision's victims win her lawsuit, so this would force UA-cam to do better
I did see ads during the video. I'm glad this was monetized. I didn't know it was monetized until I watched the video. My bad. I still wanna thank you for doing this because I was literally about to cry close to the end and it's just sad that there are people who still discredit victims
"She's just trying to ruin his life"
Perhaps... He shouldn't have done a life ruining thing? And been a proper adult? Crazy idea, I know.
As an 18 year old male, it's a very valuable and enlightening perspective that Tana, her co-host, and Rachel are sharing- that just because you personally don't feel 'victimized', traumatized, or negatively affected by a situation, that doesn't make the perpetrator any less culpable. Especially, as Rachel said - because it COULD have been detrimental and traumatizing had it happened to someone else . So yes, Tana as a sexually active 17 year old being taken advantage of by Cody didn't 'personally' traumatize her, what he did is objectively wrong and we can't let people off the hook based on whether a harmful action had material harm on *that specific 'victim'. Thank you for this Rachel, and Tana is brave for speaking out knowing she'd absolutely face this response
In terms of the “why bring it up now” there’s also the fact that she was not trying to “bring it up” in the way it is now being discussed. She brought it up in an event that wasn’t supposed to be recorded in an off handed comment. You could argue she should’ve known better, but the point it that it wasn’t her intention to start a Dialogue until other people started commenting on it.
*should have known the ramifications of what she was saying. And to be clear I also don’t agree with that, I’m just saying it wasn’t her intention regardless.
I believe that Cody has a lot of power behind the scenes with a lot of UA-camrs and that’s why people aren’t talking about it.
he has such a pleasant clean cut forward face that most peopl eprobably wouldn't think he would be involved with that crowd.
I believe this is conspiratorial thinking. He could simply be stonewalling which gives people nothing to talk about
@@franjkav a lot of people in the UA-cam sphere have connections with this guy from what I have heard. It’s just a theory, a theory that I believe is highly likely. It may be conspiratorial but I’ve heard crazier from this platform.
He's a tech guy from an Ivy League school. He has to have soooo many connections at YT.
almost definitely since he's such a well-liked and respected person not just in the commentary/reaction scene but the whole yt scene. other youtubers probably don't want to make any waves since they most likely are acquainted with him at least to some extent.
its as if these commenters think that saying "thats creepy and wrong" is the same as saying "its illegal" and are responding to that. it bothers me bc the legality is irrelevant here. he slept with a fan who was also a child. thats disgusting
I feel empathy for Tana because I was assaulted pretty young, but I thought I wasn't allowed to be upset about it because I was drunk when it happened! We have to stop this mindset that older people are allowed to take advantage of younger people, especially when they are drunk.
Why did you think you weren’t allowed to be upset?
@@franjkav a lot of victims experience shame after the assault. It can be especially hard to overcome when the victim doesn't have a support system. In general, society likes to victim blame and doesn't hold abusers accountable so it can be a huge mental hurdle to overcome and seek justice, etc
@@franjkav’well it’s my fault that something bad happened because I put myself in a vulnerable position by getting drunk without a bodyguard so it’s my fault not my assailants’
As a former Cody Ko fan this incident happenning itself was a horrible shock, but him not making any statement at all, and the majority of his fans brushing it under the rug has made it so much worse.
I had a 21yr old boyfriend when I was 14 and thought I was so grown up, looking back I realise just how wrong it was
I hate hate HATE the "well how far away from 18 is 17? months?" argument. Because how far away from 18 is your brain fully developed? years? okay. so then add a year because she's not even 18. If you start playing the 18? 17? game you can reach single digits really quick. sometimes quicker than reaching 25+ playing the opposite game. When I turned 18 I was a waitress, and the amount of men that hit on me KNOWING I wasn't even able to drink the shit I'm serving them was crazy. Literally what do we have in common? I'm flunking college and you are paying a mortgage.
But thank you for covering this, i feel like people forget to remember that a 17 year old, no matter how mature they think they are, cannot consent to an adult who's brain is already fully developed, Cody should have definitely known better, he's disgusting and so are the people who are undermining Tana coming out with something serious like this
It's also illegal in California and Florida (they both resided in CA and apparently also hooked up in FL) because of the inability to consent if you are under 18. There is no Romeo and Juliet law either and even if there was, he was more than 4 years older than her.
It is legitimately, legally statutory rape. Tana legally could not consent to what they did together.
Hey you're 100% right that is statutory and has no excuse but I just need to let you know that the brain being fully developed at 25 thing is pseudoscience
@@SteviiLoveEven if there existed a gap where it wouldn't be consisder statutory r*pe, wouldn't cody still get heat for essentially doing s*x tourism/trafficking to bring him and her tp a place where it could allow the interaction to be considered "legal"?
@@anothercub6958it’s such a stretch to even suggest this without evidence.
@@franjkav Do you know how age of consent laws work? That's just how they work
If it just so happened that they both were at a place where the age of consent would "allow" their interaction despite them both not living in said place, then yeah, the courts aren't going to look on that sort of thing favorably at all.
It'd just be seen as him taking the opportunity for it's supposed legality to do it. If we're being honest here, if he wasn't intending to use the laws to his favor, he'd still be in the wrong.
I'm not asserting anything. Their interaction wasn't going to be legal any way you cut it. I brought up one possibility of what he could be charged for. I'm not ascribing intent.
I HATE when people tell victims how to act. That is disgusting. She doesn’t owe us ANYMORE of an explanation. What more do they want her to say???? The exact details of it??? That’s insane. And just gross. She can act like she wants in regards to this. She doesn’t have to say anything. And it doesn’t matter how long she stayed silent. People take time to process things.
Including telling someone they are a victim when they literally say they arent a victim >_
The fact that she feels fine about it now doesn't make it not a crime, nor does it make it okay.
I used to be so misguidingly "nuanced" about this because I was younger. I'm only just 21 now but the idea of engaging in any romantic/sexual behaviour with a 17 years old is repulsive in so many ways. It's not just about the fact that it COULD have traumatised her, it's also about what it says about him as an adult.
As Tana said : "Why the fuck?" Like how could he even be attracted to her at such a young age and why act on it? I feel the reason might be the same to the one as to why he still supports his rapist friend...
34:16 "She's you know... A teen!" Jfc, man...
I mean if people looked at it more this way instead of pushing it to the extreme then maybe we'd get anywhere. Rachel saying Tana was a victim and r*ped, and then other people saying she "asked for it" are why its a discourse.
When maybe Tana and Cody were both attractive people, attracted to each other and hooked up. And Cody is gross for that. Thats it. So many people keep projecting instead of just listening to what Tana is saying.
@@lucaleone4331 People are calling it rape because that's what it is. I'm sorry I have to explain it to you, but just because the grown man that groomed me had already manipulated me and brainwashed me into accepting it doesn't mean that when he entered my 15 year old body he wasn't raping me. Go get your head checked.
"People will do anything to not believe victims." This line hit me hard, it's absolutely true. It's shameful how far our society still needs to go in this regard.
these reactions to her simply sharing her experience are very telling. she literally could not have presented this in a more eloquent and mature fashion, and so many people still reacted like she was personally attacking him. all because he makes them laugh
I don't remember why I stopped watching Cody Ko but there was something that turned me off of his channel. This is disappointing, but it's unfortunately not surprising. There really is a pattern of abuse in this industry
I stopped watching his videos after I found out about his and Noel’s transphobic “jokes”. He comes across as someone who wants to appear progressive and accepting but is a bigot in his everyday life. Who knows. He gives me bad vibes
@@MS-we9gnoh ew I hadn't heard of those. When did they say that
@@AK-rx8gp A while ago. All I remember is that him, Noel or both of them made jokes with the T slur and their “apology” sucked
Just did some Googling because I was curious. It happened 5 or 6 years ago, so I forgot what they said. Cody said the T slur and didn’t apologize. Noel said a comedian “made a great point” about how trans women are “rich white men” and that’s why everyone cares about trans rights now ? He apologized later on. Completely out of touch and downright hateful
When something hurt you as a child you are allowed to talk about it when you are ready really hit home for me. As a child I was raped by a family member and its only the last four years I've been distanting myself away from my family to protect my kids and myself. A friend asked why now because it didnt seem to bother me before and I was shocked. Why not?? Why can't I seperate myself from this person? It has always bothered me but I had to smother those feelings to SURVIVE LIVING THERE. I left as soon as I was 18 and even going to holidays left me with panic attacks and nervous breakdowns, which got worse when I had children. No I will not suffer for the sake of "family."
What an awful 'friend'. You have every right to do whatever necessary to protect your peace, family, and avoid triggers.
@@yanavav Its been terrible during this whole process with my mom. I want to see my family and tried to talk with my mom on a compromise on the guy being there for a certain time and my family being there but then she starts with "Why are you doing this to me....blah blah blah. So I just stopped trying. I'm glad my husbands family is so close and took me in like their own daughter. I feel at home with them.
i still remember when i was SA’d by my former partner, i felt the need to talk about it immediately, before i was ready to, because i was so afraid of the “why are you coming forward now instead of when it happened” argument. it’s such a prevalent part of our culture that’s completely ignored the effects that being assaulted has on the victim and expects them to be able to talk about their trauma immediately.
it's cody's silence that makes it all worse for me, personally.
He really thinks this situation is gonna blow over. His silence speaks volumes
He owes nobody any explanation
@@balajiraju4157OK, Cody
I’ll NEVER understand why people are so adamant about not wanting to see a person for who they are, especially men. If they present a certain way, then any way the act that doesn’t add up to their initial image is disregarded and the victim is blamed. I’ve had my fair share of atrocities with men, and nothing surprises me about them anymore. I’m not super active on social media, but I’m no longer a fan of this man anymore after seeing this video. It’s not that hard to understand, people just don’t WANT to understand. And I’m also sick of trying to convince people to want to because they would rather just live in the status quo of attractive, funny guy can do no wrong. Whatever
I never liked her content. But like. WTF? Poor girl. Hesus Christ.
yeah when i found out about her years ago i def didn't like her. she seems to have matured a lot. but regardless, you don't have to like someone to know when something has been done wrong to them.
but even then looking through my times at her age then, once my ex and I split up. my friends and I at that age, 18-21 were wild. we jsut didn't have money liek that but we drank partied and did stupid shit just like them all the time. so now in my maturity i look back at my disliek for her as stupid cause i did the same hsit. most of us did lol.
In what world has a woman or anybody’s career ever gotten a boost from coming forward about sa allegations? Please be for real. Even if she did “joke” about it before maybe it was her way of trying to process what happened to her.
The fact that you have to use the term "technically legal" should tell you you're talking about something fishy
Legal doesn't mean moral.
@@roxassora2706 100%. Slavery was legal at some point.
oh my god thank you for covering this rachel literally nobody talks about it and it's so strange to me
this is not something that can be swept under the rug no matter how hard cody tries by deleting comments and reddit posts about it
I’ll be honest, all those former Vine people come off as vapid and dooshy. Hearing that one of them predated on a younger, underage cohort belongs on the same level of moral disbelief as my cat refusing to listen to my pleas for mercy.
*douchey. But you're a 100% correct. These people are the rich jocks in high school that got away with everything.
dooshy
I hope Danny and Drew don't copy that aspect of his career👬
@@anothercub6958 I hope not, but I won't be surprised, sadly
I disagree that all of them are like that. Thomas Sanders, Drew Gooden and Zach King all seem like super cool people to me.
I am so happy D'Angelo Wallace found that old clip of Gabbie Hanna telling the story abt telling a famous YT to not mess with an underage YT who was only 17. It helps give credibility to Tana which is needed for these rape apologist. Tana doesn't need clout! And no woman whose made accusations has ever gotten CLOUT for coming forward! They just get harassed and dragged.
Where did the idea that Cody is wholesome even come from?
Bc his relationship with Kelsey was very green flag, and alot of his videos were putting down negative or toxic people or things.
one of the biggest things ive picked up from watching him is that he really likes to talk abt edging, so i find this take to be hilarious, too. when discussing andrew tate w noel, he refused to completely-disavow tate as a person and one of them straight up said that they "couldnt ever say they dislike tate" whilst the other gestured in a manner that would suggest they agree. plus he's a frat boy lmao... people and their headcanons ig
literally.
@@lucaleone4331just like imalex….
I used to be a fan of Cody and TMG but once I really matured in college, I found their humor really lame at best or misogynistic/homophobic at worst. Also they really started to pivot their content towards a more “male” audience (lots of penis, sex, and poop jokes). It still surprises me that they have lots of young girl/queer audiences still (but I guess that’s a rite of passage for them). I also used to like Tana in her early career and did think (at the time 16/17) that I needed to act more “mature” to attract the (male) UA-camrs I idolized. I don’t hold any resentment, but I definitely internalized her internet persona at that age. I’m glad that Tana is able to reflect on those effects on other people and being honest. It sucks honestly to realize that we were taken advantage of by people our age now. I suspect some diehard fans of Cody right now are still largely young and might have this moment happen for them too one day. And it ends by cutting off the cycle and allowing people space for restoration and reflection!! Also with the toxicity of Greek life and frat culture, they MUST be abolished. those institutions have long (and still do) protected abusers and further silence victims or worked with school administration and police to avoid punishment. It’s often the reddest flag someone can have imo 😶
i watched noel for a little bit after watching their cringe series but he seemed like an ahole and kind of boring, i couldn't watch anymore 💀
Finally! Someone is actually talking this situation! I find it awfully suspicious that Cody has been deleting comments on his videos that talk about this situation Edit: I'm quite frankly horrified that Cody's fans are just not saying anything about what he did, like they're just sweeping this under the rug...
Fans ARE saying things about it, he's just having comments on UA-cam deleted, and people have been banned on his subreddit. You can still see plenty of comments on his Instagram though, thank god. There's also a lot us over on r/CodyKoUnfiltered talking about all of this!
I think most of them just don’t know. I mean I just found out because I have never engaged with Tana’s content or anyone even remotely associated with Tana
Sounds like it's a cult of personality at this point.
Every time someone makes a post about it on his reddit sub it gets deleted, so it’s just hard to actually talk about it. Especially the thing with him allegedly inviting someone to his wedding who ~took advantage~ of someone when they were in college together
Thee subreddit was getting ban heavy for a while so a lot of fans didn't genuinely know. Of course there were vocal defenders, but it was being suppressed
Regarding the "I need Proof" weirdos...I am sure a lot of them know that sometimes it is impossible to have tangible proof or at least highly unlikely. And I am sure that that's exactly why they demand it, because they know that it Most likely doesn't exist. Which enables them to keep living in denial and pretend like bad things don't happen. And If they do, the victim should Just get over it. Because if there is no Proof, apparently also nothing happened. And it makes my blood boil honestly.
seeing tana speak maturely and take accountability for the things she's said (or at least the way she said them) is so mind blowing. she's definitely grown up so much, and that's amazing.
I think part of the issue is that all the people who haven't done that work are blind to it in other people, so all the words coming out of her mouth sound like yapping to them
I’m 19 and thinking about sleeping with a 17 yo is weird to ME, could not imagine being 25 and thinking that was okay
Right? I'm 18 and just finished my first year of college, I couldn't imagine dating a HIGH SCHOOLER even if they were also 18
The fact that he says in the video that she was a teenager, made my blood boil! It doesn't matter if she was of legal age of consent, when you see a person and you think she is a teenager, and I'm not (that what transpired in the video clip) it is not okay to have sex with that person!
People really give me headache. The speech about ruinning everything for him is nauseating, and is so overused in every case that i witnessed there is always at least one person who use that on the victim
Shut up and listen to the victim!
''Why bring it up now?'' Should be, ''why not bring it up now?'' People are going to complain no matter when she brings it up. It will never be a 'good time'.
She owes nothing to anyone but herself. Feeling basically pressured to discuss a trauma is a horrible feeling. I was taken advantage of by a 23 year old when I was 15. It’s horrible that she feels the need before she is 100% ready.
people who are saying "idc what he did i'll still watch his content" are NOT separating the art from the artist because in cody ko's case, the "art" is bottom tie reaction content. i can still imagine having trouble in the case of say polanski or woody allen but cody ko isn't an "artist" you should have trouble getting rid of. these people just have a weird parasocial relationship with him.
a weird parasocial relationship and/or very poor or week morals
I heard about this situation about a year ago and was surprised by how little coverage it got. I hope that this video stays monetized and doesn't get suppressed by the algorithm!
Thank you so much for covering this. I found out the stuff about Colby Leachman a couple years ago when literally the only posts about Cody being friends with this guy were from some random Reddit account and a Twitter thread with 2 likes. I’m really disgusted to hear about him taking advantage of Tana and hearing her say she was 17 and he was 25 makes me sick to my stomach.
Also people defending Cody and being horrible to Tana makes me so mad. I used to be a huge fan of Cody in 2019 and I don’t like Tana very much. However, I still believe her and am not going to discount her experience just to defend a UA-camr I like. Also an additional note- being a father doesn’t make someone a good person???
Her talking about how she feels about the situation is so helpful. She shouldn't be made to feel like she "has to" address it, but her doing it is definitely highlighting how not everyone will react the same way about such an event. Victims thinking that they can't call themselves victims is so common. I'm glad it didn't affect her too badly, but damn... it's so f*cked that he did this to her.
I think people don't realize that when you're actively a victim of something, you don't understand that you are one. When you're 17 having sex with a 25 year old, you don't see yourself as a someone who's a victim of something. You see yourself as someone who other people your age would envy for being with someone older and more mature.
Exactly ! It’s like people don’t understand why minors can’t consent. It’s for this exact reason. You can’t see yourself as a victim until you get older. That doesn’t mean the exploitation/trauma didn’t happen and then magically appeared when you became an adult. Rather, children can’t understand until they mature, and your trauma feels ephemeral until you get older and you realize why
Comments on his videos and posts/comments on his reddit are just getting mass deleted. It's incredibly disappointing and frustrating that it seems he's just going to wait for this to pass and post as normal.
I never liked Cody Ko and had no reason or explanation whatsoever just like David Dobrick. The more “unproblematic favs” got exposed the more I wondered about those two. People like Danny and Drew and Kurtis are far more likely to take accountability and apologize and change their behavior, and I think that is so much more reliable than the people who “don’t do bad things” in the first place, because chances are, they’re just not addressing those things
Really appreciate you putting yourself out there and advocating for CSA survivors, Rachel. It can be difficult going against the grain of a culture that permits and protects predators. Please take care of yourself and keep being you.
Thank you for your commitment to advocacy. You cover these important injustices so well and counter the same ole piss poor excuses/reasons people say every single time a victim talks about their experiences. Beyond the courage it takes, people know they will he met with backlash. But they do so to protect others. Why these victim blames can’t seem to wrap their head around this, instead saying they’re only doing it for “clout” is beyond. Um no Chad, there are people who actually care about others and want to make sure people don’t have to go through the BS they were subjected to.
It’s so important to keep talking because it seems to take the majority of cis males 100+ years to finally understand such simple concepts. And then hopefully followed that newfound knowledge with positive changes.
Lastly just wanted to say so sorry things have been rough on your end. I hope you’re on the road to feeling better. And that hopefully next time you aren’t forced into cold turkey systems (avoiding the w word cause don’t want to contribute to YT suppressing) because you don’t have access to your medication…a lot of assumptions being made on my part, but knowing how sh!t healthcare is these days I figured it was some ridiculous administrative issue that was brushed off and caused the delay.
I hate that it needs to be said again and again but an adult has the full responsibilty to not date and have a sexual relationship with a minor. Period. It doesn't matter if that minor is almost 18 or supposedly "mature for their age", those are all just a bunch of excuses. Any adult who is not a creep or predator looks at a teenager (or honestly even people in their early 20s) and thinks "That is a child" and would never have any kind of relationship with them beyond maybe a casual friendship.
Your worldview is not the norm....you cannot force your morality on other people
I think it's great that people like Tana and Joshua David Evans are coming forward with their stories. It shows that there is no such thing as a perfect person, let along the perfect victim. Tana has done some dumb shit. Joshua (Colleen B's ex) has done some dumb shit. They are still victims in their own right. As much as I don't like Tana, this was something awful that she has experienced.
It seems like a lot people would rather turn and look the other way than confront bad or abusive behavior.
I feel like it's the same impulse that drives the bystander effect.
People feel that someone else will speak up on the victim's behalf, while selfishly avoiding the relatively minute/inconsequential degree of awkwardness that they would need to endure for the sake of helping someone.
It's so depressing..
I somehow had no idea who Cody was until a year or two ago, and I've been watching most of his videos since then. To me, he always came across as a trustworthy, respectful person (and none of the videos I watched contained anything I thought was problematic) but now I'm feeling icky and probably won't watch him again.
I hate when this stuff happens.
Same. I really liked his content, felt weird once I heard about the Duke incident but thought, well maybe it's a complicated situation where he had to not make waves bc it would've jeopardized his education bc of his frat brother's father, and he had him in his wedding party for the same reason, bc of extenuating circumstances. But this was the final straw and I unsubbed. It sucks how well these kinds of people hide in plain sight, and how misogyny and violence against women is so deeply entrenched that it can influence even the most seemingly normal, decent men into thinking this behavior is okay. It really feels inextricable.
Were you watching more recent content? It’s possible he’s changed and matured since this situation happened
@@franjkav if he's changed and matured, why is he trying to brush it under the rug and why was his message to tana so flippant? surely someone who's changed would be horrified at their past actions, not go out of his way to stifle information abt it getting out, would firmly-condemn and disavow all of the people trying to defend him by blaming his victim and - idk - apologise? if id done smn like this (regardless of whether or not i had ill intent or knew of the dubious-nature of my actions), id immediately reach out to the victim and apologise profusely, publicly confirm my actions and make it clear that i didnt stand by them and am disgusted by my past self and then *directly* call out all of the repugnantly-cruel defenses of me by making it clear that im not going to allow any further harm to come to the victim.
right now, all he's done is half-assedly ask if he and tana are "cool" before bringing up his family in order to guilt trip her into silence, filter all comments on his video discussing this situation and instruct the mods of his subreddit, whom are all friends of his, to block any posts regarding the situation. the only things he's allowing to stay up are the abhorrent, victim blaming remarks of his diehard glazers - aka, he is positively reinforcing vitriol against tana (in his inaction) and negatively reinforcing any criticism of him
hes so misogynistic though i could never watch his videos
The only people ive heard talk about this are you and Adam McIntyre- ita so important that people talk about stuff like this. I appreciate this video so so much ❤
I love all the people saying they believe Cody Ko. K, cool. Um, he hasn't actually denied this.
This reminds me of how Trisha was treated after the Colleen situation - she too was an "imperfect" victim with a background that apparently invalidated what happened to her.
SOOOOOOOO suprised this as on my feed considering I swear youtube is supressing videos about this while bombarding me with his videos despite me unsubscribing from all of his channels. I mean, I'm subscribed and watch every one of your videos, but I'm STILL surprised.
the way she talked about this topic broke my heart…but i really appreciate the message she gave to survivors. coming from her, it felt quite important
Ppl really lack concern for when teenagers get taken advantage of I’ve noticed and it’s very sad
When the clip came up and she just said "I was 17 and Cody was 25" I cried. I'm not even 100% sure why, probably my own experiences but anyway-- When someone posted that comment about her saying it as a "side comment" or a "quip" it was a bit odd to me because when I heard it, I took as a genuine, brave, and serious statement. And besides-- it's none of our business!! She is processing things her own way in her own time!
One thing that bothers me about this situation is how Tana's claim that she doesn't associate the event with trauma is used in defense of Cody and as an argument that he shouldn't be held accountable. Even if we assume Tana ended up okay, so what? How was he supposed to know that when he chose to do what he did? That's a stroke of luck, not something that absolves him of guilt.
If you decide to put a child or minor through a typically traumatic situation, it's of course great if they come out of it unharmed, but that doesn't change the choice you made. At best, he took advantage of a situation and recklessly put Tana's mental health at major risk while disregarding her actual consent.
Thank you for talking about this. D’Angelo Wallace just dropped a video about this calling out big creators for covering for Cody by not talking about this and deleting comments about this on his UA-cam page.
I'm glad you posted this! I embarrassingly watched Cody's videos until recently, when I saw a video by Jake Doolittle about it. As soon as I heard the news, I stopped watching Cody, it's not the same knowing what he's done and I hope his more loyal fans stop as well...
Same here! I just can’t see him the same way anymore, there’s no separating content from creator
Oh jeez jake embarrassed himself too about something. I cant remember, is he doing better? I wanna resub
@@lindyloohooJake made a very ill-thought-out video attempting to “attack” Ethan Klein because Ethan had talked about his own very genuine health concerns on the h3 pod, but as it’s a comedy podcast Ethan was poking fun at himself a little bit and making light of the situation (despite the fact that he was also clearly distressed and worried about his symptoms). Jake clipped Ethan out of context, put words in his mouth and engaged in a very bad faith attack on Ethan basically accusing him of “stolen valor” because despite being genuinely sick Ethan hadn’t got an official diagnosis yet and Jake as a chronically ill person decided to falsely frame it like Ethan was faking his illness for views.
Anyway Jake has since issued an apology and moved on and the h3 crew also have generally moved past it. I used to love Jake’s content and watch him all the time and I’m still subbed but I don’t really watch his videos anymore because I felt his actions spoke very poorly to his character.
@@liesbeneathoureyesThat's an interesting take. My impression of Jake's video wasn't that it was done in bad faith, but that he had a massive emotional blind spot where chronic illness was concerned. Ya know, facts to suit theories instead of theories to suit facts. I doubt that he would have put out such a long video calling out a much more popular content creator if he didn't feel like he had a leg to stand on, based on his other work
But it's not like I know the guy other than his channel, so who can say 🤷🏼♀️
@@liesbeneathoureyes thank you 😭 my brain decides to get rid of the reason i hold a grudge but i remember i dislike someone lol. I appreciate the recap :) ill go look into jake again!
even if she was 18 when he was 25 It's still odd.
I'm 22 & the idea of sleeping with an 18 year old feels wrong.
Okay, I’ve finished the video now & all I can say is, THANK YOU, Rachel. As someone who was SA’d by a boy 4 years older than me and by 2 men in their 20s when I was a pre teen, this hits a bit close to home for me. I was a wreck & a rebel acting out when those grown men SA’d me because I’d just lost my dad & I was doing anything I could to feel something other than grief, depression, & anxiety. That led me to being SA’d at 12/23 & 13/14 & I didn’t tell a soul until I was 24. Not only did I not speak a word of it until I was 24, but I didn’t even realize the trauma & impact it had on me until then & I believed I’d given consent until fairly recently (for reference, I’m 29 now). I genuinely thought that me NOT ferociously fighting back & yelling “no” & me NOT saying “no, I won’t be your girlfriend or do physical things with you” meant that I had consented & I was not SA’d. Only recently did I realize that so much of what I did & didn’t do was due to the first time I was SA’d at 9 & the way that boy treated me when I fought back, & that while I didn’t ferociously fight back or yell “no,” I was still extremely uncomfortable, didn’t want what they did to me, & they were more than old enough to know that even trying to talk to me in a relationship manner was wrong, let alone to do things to me.
The thought of me now, at 29, or even me at 21 & 26 (the men’s ages at the time), EVER even hanging around someone under the age of 21 (aside from my little sister) makes me so damn uncomfortable, let alone ever thinking they were attractive or anything! 🤢 & Just like Tana, being able to look back NOW & know everything I know, I could absolutely never do or feel such things as those men did, so yeah, I talk about it NOW despite not having done so for a decade.
You’ve made such great points, Rachel, & I’m so thankful to finally see a big creator not just “cover the story,” but actually point out what was wrong & why it was wrong. It’s heartbreaking to hear all those comments by CK’s fans- of which I USED to be- & I know Tana has to be struggling with that. I just hope she knows we stand with her & we support her, just as we stand with & support you & every other person who has ever been through such situations.
I hope you’re getting rest & taking care of yourself. Please do some self care, love on yourself, & let yourself work through everything you’re feeling. It will get better & I hope it does ASAP. Thank you for all your hard work & for speaking out against someone who is no doubt pretty powerful in the YT space. Sending you, Tana, & everyone else struggling all my love & virtual hugs. xx ❤❤
TMI, but my grandmother was impregnated by my grandfather when she was 16 and he was 22.
Yes, they say it was love, and yes I know it made me eventually, BUT she never graduated and was robbed of a future. They consented, but the consequences of the consent carry; I would still argue that even if you feel the affection was true, you were coerced. She was a child.
I’m 22 now, and even when I was 20 in college on tinder I would NEVER match with an 18 y/o who was a Senior in HS (versus an 18 y/o Freshman in College; I have a spring birthday so I can understand if someone just hasn’t turned 19 yet). I cannot even IMAGINE someone less than that, ESPECIALLY WHEN I WOULD BE IN GRAD SCHOOL AT 25!?!