Men in Black is Awesome! - Hack The Movies
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- Опубліковано 6 лют 2025
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Tony with Newt and Crystal review Men in Black. In this Podcast / Movie Review of Men in Black they will go into detail about the things that make Men in Black awesome. Like the amazing practical effects done by Rick Baker, the incredible pairing of Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones, and the amazing theme song!
They are the best-kept secret in the universe. Working for a highly funded yet unofficial government agency, Kay (Tommy Lee Jones) and Jay (Will Smith) are the Men in Black, providers of immigration services and regulators of all things alien on Earth. While investigating a series of unregistered close encounters, the MIB agents uncover the deadly plot of an intergalactic terrorist who is on a mission to assassinate two ambassadors from opposing galaxies currently in residence in New York City.
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Honey (the app) is better than bacon (the food)
Do Alien 3 Review Tony Stop Trolling Coward!
I get mine from bees
she looks really fun to hang out with
The full version of the joke Kay is telling in the Chinese restaurant:
So a man and a woman decided to take in a movie one night, and it just so happens that on that same night a farmer has decided to sneak in one of his roosters from his farm. After getting their snacks the couple head into the darkened auditorium, which is nearly full. There are only two seats left, and they happen to be next to the farmer and the rooster which he has concealed in his pants. Midway through the movie, the rooster pokes his head out of the farmer's zipper and begins to peck and eat the woman's popcorn, she notices and nudges her husband; "Honey, look what this guy's cock is doing!" Her husband replies; "Ah, don't pay it no mind, if you've seen one you've seen 'em all!" So she looks over at her husband and says; "Yeah, but honey, this one's eating my popcorn!"
🤣😂🤣😂🤣
Thank you. A 24-year mystery of my life solved.
Somehow I laugh as a non native English speaker / reader after read it for the 2nd time...
I think its funnier we as the audience only here the very last part because you feel a bit disoriented like will Smith
Thanks 4 sharing by the way
Found this channel thru cinnemassacre which I’ve watched for a decade. Now I watch you religiously instead of James. This is a great semi intellectual, sometimes train wreck that I crave now. You guys keep up the great work. This is my fav crew lineup.
semi intellectual train wreck is a solid description
James is a hack
It’s awesome to see the Cinemassacre Universe expand. Lol if this were MCU, Hack the Movies would be like The Guardians of the Galaxy.
I've been having a hard time lately. This episode took me out of a massive panic attack (I'm good.) Thank yall so much, keep doing your thing!
oh jeez. I hope you are okay
21:04 Vincent D'Onofrio wasn't in Platoon. You're thinking of Full Metal Jacket.
Beat me to it. 👍🏻
How do you forget Private Pyle, and he even says the title of the movie in his big scene.
Luckily in this universe there is only a single MIB movie. The studios knew it was a bad idea to make sequels and did us all a favor
Your smoking crack second one was fire hahah
The 2nd one is the worst...well I never saw the reboot. Personally I think the third is the best...unneeded really but probably the best.
I liked the third... Thanos was great
The first one is the best, the cartoon is good, and the third one is watchable. There is no second or 4th film!!
I hope this episode finally kickstarts Newt's OnlyFans page, where he released one video a week, and it is just him telling stories around a campfire, or reviewing different alcoholic drinks 😁
i would never run out of tales. but may die of liver failure
@@newtonwallen3210 I would argue that, perhaps based on viewing demographics, one could get a new liver easy enough, so the stories never end 😘
I'd subscribe to it.
@@newtonwallen3210 Newt, I remember Disney Adventure Magazine!! I do!
@@newtonwallen3210 ahaha :)
Looks like it's up to AGENT T, AGENT N, and AGENT C to save the universe from the Gengar disguised as Justin. Let's hope it's not an intergalactic kegger.
Tony made mistake about Vincent D onofrio. Vincent was in Full Metal Jacket, not in Platoon
That last bit where Tony keeps flashing himself ( Not like that :P ) @ 1:11:48 had me laughing so hard xD
Imagining Edgar in that ship is almost as funny as imagining Wilford Brimley in that tiny makeshift flying saucer in The Thing!
The whole MIB trilogy is one of my favourite scores by Danny Elfman. Each film has its own style. He actually got an Oscar nomination for this film (2 actually, second being Good Will Hunting)
Newt, I know about the song you're talking about. My elementary school music teacher had us do it. We also turned the lights out. We had another song where everyone sat in a circle and someone laid in the middle as if they were in a casket. I can't remember the words to either song, or what they're called, but I do remember them. I haven't thought about that in at least a couple decades. Thank you for the nostalgia!
I remember that song creeping right out of my head back in Kindergarten. Wooo-oooh-ooh-ooh!
@@williecdog exactly
The most amazing thing I learned in this review is someone rolled the dice and decided to sponsor it.
I legit have no idea how they havnt done a men in black live action TV series. You could have so much fun in this universe!!
They had the cartoon... Why bother with live action show?
I remember watching all the Men in Black movies in the cinema. There are definitely layers in each movie.
Thankfully I only saw the first one in the theater. I knew from the trailers to avoid the others.. Ironically, I saw the third one in a hospital while my ex-wife had surgery done on her knee.
Newt, I remember that song about the Old Lady of Skin and Bones. When I was in kid's choir at church, we sung that song every Halloween. That brought back some good childhood memories. Thank you, Newt. Thank you.
funny that that found its way into this episode. the weekend before we shot this. that song just popped into my head out of nowhere
Alan Silvestri also completely ripped himself off in Back to the Future Part 2. Listen to some of the cues from Predator, then watch the scene where Marty is in the Alternate 1985
Some of the score was even used in Judgment Night, for which he also composed.
The timing of this being on my 25th Birthday and this movie is 24 years old is nuts. You guys are awesome and can't wait to see what you guys have in store next
I know I said this on Twitter already but….HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!
Hey young dude.... Top tip, don't have any kids 👍
@@Crystalquin thank you again
Make newt the permanent co host. You can still have other guests too, but newt and Tony have great chemistry
Needs female cohost with diff guest each week
@@SAM-ru4vx we have johanna and crystal when they are available and trish and erin plays is coming on soon
@@newtonwallen3210 coming on what?
@@mgloco88 this show. to review a movie.
Since I became a regular viewer of the channel I realised Newt isn't exactly a co-host like I thought initially. Yeah Newt and Tony should become a "couple" and lead the show. There's a very good chemistry between them. I'm curious also why Newt hasn't been in any AVGN / Cinemassacre shows.
Newt, you are now my favorite person ever for making that "Self-cleaning mutant" reference from MST3K.
Keep on being awesome! 😁
MIB 3 is one of the most underrated sequels ever! Josh Brolin was perfectly cast as a young K his Tommy Lee Jones impression was spot on👍
Part 3’s are always the worst movie in nearly every trilogy. Dark Knight Rises being the worst of any offender!!!
I thought it was ok..
I agree!! I love the Villian too! It's a lot better than MIB2. The ending is really sweet, and makes me tear up everytime.
@@Dartanyoogles EXACTLY! MIB 3 had a lot of heart and was actually a good film. I just don't get the hate.
@@beejay271 Me either. Everyone is great in it! I thought it was the funniest that Will Smith was in all three movies.
The movie reviews should last as long as the movie being reviewed.
A lot of them are
The worst teamup that didn't work, Jay Leno and Pat Morita in Collision Course.
YES
A teamup that did work really well was Dolph Lungren and Brandon Lee in Showdown in Little Tokyo!!
There was a plauge of little green flies in Scottland 1997. They reproduced and died in 24 hours. You couldn't go outside without walking thru a wall of these flies and brushing the dead ones off once you got back indoors.
MIB is one of my top 5 favorite movies of all time and it's very timeless and a masterpiece. It was the first PG-13 rated movie I've ever watched as a kid. I loved every minute of it.
NEWT! I remember a version of the song you’re talking about! My music teacher did the same thing with turning the lights out, and I can still remember where I was too.
“Have you seen the ghost of John? Long white bones with the skin all gone… Oooooh ooooooh oooooh ooooh. Wouldn’t it be chilly with no skin on?”
Crystal your outfit was amazing 😍!!! Also looking good with the shades. Great review guys and I really hope y'all review Alien 3.
Thanks!
Haha, thanks so much guys was fun listening too.
This is the best review channel. Thank you Newt.
Its the Tony show but I will take it
The MIB ride in Florida is so much fun. It has so many cool details too. For instance, The Doorknobs on the fake doors throughout the line. If you try to use them they do different special things.
I work for Universal (now), and had no idea about this.. Nice!
1:04:10 Crystal showin' off those guns.
I'm the backwards man, the backwards man. I can walk backwards fast as you can, I can walk backwards fast as you can.
So my dad took my cousin and I to see Men in Black on July 3rd 1997 during Agent J first scene some guy wearing the same jumpsuit outfit as Will Smith came running down the isle of the movie theatre and the ushers chased him out so every time i see that scene or hear about it i think of that guy running in the theatre 😂😎
Saw it in theaters in 97. Loved it. Got some of the toys later that summer for my birthday.
Trivia: Linda Fiorentino most recent IMDb credit is, Once More with Feeling (2009).
Cat came back by Fred Penner
Thx for having Newt on my birthday episode!
I planned that. just for you. happy Birthday
@@newtonwallen3210 Thx)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
@@Crystalquin
Nice!!
I now have a reason to be excited for Monday!
I still remember my mom took me and my friend to the movies back in 97. My friend and my mom wanted to watch MIB while I begged to watch Batman and Robin. Let’s just say I was never forgiven for that
If you were born in the 80's, you had GHOSTBUSTERS.
If you were born in the 90's, you had MEN IN BLACK.
Men in Black and Small Soldiers were GENUINELY the two movies that transformed my childhood into something special.
The perfect birthday gift for me MIB review on hack the movies
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
HAPPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!
@@newtonwallen3210 thank you this made my birthday ❤️
@@Crystalquin thank you !! ❤️
This is the all-star lineup I've been waiting for, and a fun flick to boot! Thanks for giving the people what they want.
So fun!! Nice meeting y'all this past weekend!!
Men in Black was the first movie I remember watching as a kid. I think I was 4 years old when it came out. I barely remember it, but I remember watching it in a drive through movie theater. Haven't been to one since then. It was fun from what I remember XD. And its probably why I like alien movies so much.
I vaguely remember that song Newt, not as vividly as you but when you hummed that It sounded familiar, I think from music class.
I know that skin and bones song! We played it in the 2nd grade. There was a game to it where you had to try to scare someone without letting them see you move.
The Fugitive...
Tony from Hack the Movies takes an old dirty rag out of the drawer and begins to dust off the counters of the video store. Everything tony has touched has turned to gold, and today he has touched the hearts and minds of America.
"All of this is mine," Tony says gleefully with a smirk.
"HALF yours!" a voice from under the desk announces.
A startled Tony looks down to see a face peering back at him.
Tony turns his head to see a tiny cowering figure. A very dirty, very terrified Newt clutching a plastic food packet in one hand, its top gnawed partway through; in his other hand, Newt grips the head of a large doll, holding it by the hair. Eyes staring like a pathetically emaciated fragile as Dresden china, his hair matted and tangled like a wild animal.
Tony moves towards Newt, reaching slowly under the counter; he begins to extend his hands towards him. Suddenly, Newt backs away, trembling visibly, his vision fixated like a rabbit blinded by headlights. Tony's hand almost reaches Newt's soft face.
"Newt?! Where did you come from?!" Tony asks.
Newt bolts away like a shot, scuttling along beneath the cabinetry. Tony scrambles to follow, to keep Newt in his sight, crabbing frantically sideways and forwards. Tony reaches out to grab, catching only one tiny ankle, and thrusts his other hand out in a lame attempt to catch a scared fish.
Newt reaches a ventilation duct set in the baseboard of the video store, the grille kicked out and dented. He scrambles inside, his tiny body barely fitting, wriggling like a fish out of water desperately trying to find its way home.
With all of his muscle mass, Tony was well aware he would never make it through the tiny duct without damaging the hull of the store without a bit of help from technology. Using his quick wit, Tony opens up a bottle of popcorn butter and starts lathering his entire body until he can squirm himself into the duct.
Just ahead, he sees Newt enter a dark space and slam a steel hatch. Tony pushes the hatch open before Newt can close it and crawls in after him.
Tony sighs in relief as he looks at Newt backed into a cul-de-sac-like steel chamber, shining his light around in amazement, body glistening like a greek god.
"A nest..." Tony thinks. "and built by a man-child no less."
In the corner were wadded-up blankets and pillows lining the space, mixed up with a haphazard array of toys, stuffed animals, dolls, videotapes, cheap jewelry, comic books, empty food packets, Sylvester Stallone as The Terminator, and even a VCR from 1997. Tony marvels at the man-child's incredible adaptability, the ability to function even in this nightmarish environment of Kaldor.
Newt edges along the far wall and dives for the hatch.
Tony lunges forward, grabs him, and controlling him in a bear-hug. The man-child struggles wildly, like a dog at the vets. Eyes wide, hands lashing out in a frenzy... But silent. No screams.
"It's okay, it's okay. It's over..." Tony comforts Newt. "It's over... You're going to be all right now... It's okay... You're safe..."
Newt goes limp, almost catatonic. His cold, vacant stare telling the tale of a million horrors. His lips, white and trembling. Body, flinching from unseen terrors. A multiverse of nightmare worlds in his eyes.
Tony's light falls on something amidst the debris... A framed photograph of Newt, dressed up as Robin from Batman and Robin, smiling, with a ribbon in his hair. In embossed gold letters, it says:
"IN THE JUSTICE COURT OF PHILADELPHIA, STATE OF PENNSYLVANIA - CRYSTAL APPLICANT - TEMPORARY ORDER FOR PROTECTION AGAINST STALKING, AGGRAVATED STALKING, OR HARASSMENT - DEFENDANT NEWT"
Huddled on the floor, arms around his knees. Looking at an unknown point in space. Newt gently rocks back and forth.
"How... how long have you been down here?" Tony asks.
No response. Newt begins to hum quietly to himself.
"Where are your parents? Do you have any family? Are you alone down here?" Tony asks frantically. Looking around, he knows he wouldn't want to be down here for very long, let alone his suspicions Newt has been down here for years.
Tony points towards the photograph: "Who is Crystal?"
Newt suddenly takes a breath and does not let it out. Quivering more than before.
"Total brain-lock," Tony thought to himself as he started digging through his utility belt and pulls out a bio-monitoring cuff. "Here, put this on so I can get a read of your overall status."
Tony Kneels beside Newt, brushing his unkempt hair out from his eyes in a gentle, maternal fashion. He attaches the bio-monitor to Newt's neck as he lashes out in faux pain.
Tony remembered that he has a stash of candy lined in the recesses of his spacesuit and rips out two butter finger bars, "Maybe you will like this?" Tony says, smiling, holding the tasty treat to Newt's face.
Newt wraps his tiny man-child hands around the candy bar, opens his mouth slightly, tongue depressed on the round knob-like end of the delectable confection, and chomps down smiling.
"Poor thing. You don't talk much, do you? That's okay by me. Most people do a lot of talking, and they wind up not saying very much." Tony says while wiping Newt's chin clean with a napkin.
With a twinkle in his eye, Tony says, "Uh oh. I made a clean spot here. Now I've done it. Guess I'll have to do the whole thing."
Tony pours water from a squeeze bottle onto a small cloth and gently washes Newt's little man-child face. Newt's eyes seem to focus on Tony for the first time.
"Hard to believe... there's a little man under all this. And a pretty one at that." Tony says, holding back a giggle.
-------
Stay tuned for the continuation next week.
Watched Mummy cop today.Its nice to see tony has gotten so buff!
Damn, first review I missed premier for in 2 months. It was moving day, I hope you understand Tony. lmao Looking forward to watching tonight before I go to sleep though.
I'll let it slide....THIS TIME
Loved the MIB4 skit lol.. 1:11:48 I wish I had a "neurolizer" to forget 2 and 4 as well!!
so.....wear sunglasses during this review. got it.
Wear ‘em, otherwise you’ll have to look right here **gets out neuralyzer**
What was I doing for almost 2hrs?!?? 🤷♂️🤷♂️🤷♂️
It’s the men in black!!!
Next ALIEN 3.....
I hope Newt has some good stories for this movie and he tells them
Big Willy Style. 😎
The cartoon was amazing. People from the first two movies reprise their roles, they expended on characters like the bugs and the worms. After the second movie came out there was a big epic two-parter where all of the villains were broken out of prison and collaborated with each other to overthrow the Men in Black. The animation style was really good too. For whatever reason though it's not one you can ever find on DVD or Blu-ray
I feel like I am the only one who loves all three of the Original Men in Black Movies.
@@OmegaRedFan I guess but, I find enjoyment in both sequels, the second one has insane plot and the third is definitely Josh Brolin performance
i LIKE them. they got worse as they went on if you ask me (just like most series)
@@freemovies3524 I will agree
@@generalpotato9140 the cartoon is amazing
@@theitfactorjameswheezer2852 what I remember from watching it when I was 5. I would agree
1:38 oof… this ad did NOT age well >>
@@zombiepainter2169 I totally forgot we did a Honey ad
Newt! I remember the weird old lady song! My Elementary school music teacher would play it all the time around Halloween every year.
1:07:03 That clip needs to be a text alert sound 🤣🤣🤣
Hey what are those alien 3 DVDs doing on the table ?
That face Tony pulled during the nuralizer scene near the end - he actually didn't look like John Belushi!
Tony. Please do Aliens 3 you have talked about it several times and every time you have I have given a thumbs up. I hope you do it soon.
When people talk about obscure comic book adaptations, nobody ever brings up Men in Black. they deal with everything paranormal, not just aliens. That aside, yay, Crystal's in the episode!
@newt
I remember that song. Not word for word but at Halloween time in kindergarten / 1st grade we would turn the lights off and do spooky things like that.
Tony and newts acting skills are superb in the honey commercial lol
Newt! Busting out a Graham Hancock reference!! Class man, total class!!!
Funny Chris Hemsworth is in both the Ghostbusters and Men in Black Reboots
I love how there's aliens speaking their own language in this movie.
Looks like Newt and Crystal will be in for a surprise come October.
Where can I see the Wild Wild West episode? Not finding it on the UA-cam page
“Did the check clear? Did I like it?”
Rich Evans
😅😂🤣🥲🤣😂😆😄😃😁😀
I'll bet Tony will use the Neulizer to whip everyone's memory and have them watch the Men in Black video in order to get more views.
No, crystal makes it look good...already diggin the outfit.
16:28 He's not wrong, but Bad is Better than OTW and Thriller combined. 😎
I came for newt, i stayed for crystal. Oh yeah, tony.
👏👏👏
I come for the ToNewt, but stay for the Crystal 💎
1:07:13 You were about a year 3 months too early. 😂😂😂😂😂
I miss the discovery zone laser tag ha
One of my fav will smith movies
33:45 Y’know, that’s the question I’ve always asked about Will Smith in this movie AND Keanu Reeves in The Matrix. Don’t either of these characters have parents, family or a circle of friends?
Well they Ret conned Wills dad in MIB 3, but i dont know about his mother
You know what the difference is between you and me? *Puts on glasses* ......I make this look Good.''
59:30 was a funny little moment
MIB 3 is underrated. It's a lot better than 2. Way better villian, the time travel elements are really fun, and Brolin is amazing.
I feel like the good 90's blockbusters get shafted compared to the blockbusters of the 80's. I even remember the first Jurassic Park fell out of favor during the early to mid 2000's. Obviously it become beloved again. But it's just about the only one.
Hey Tony from Hack the Movies . I saw Quentin Tarantino on the JRE Podcast mention he wanted to start a movie review podcast set in a video store where they review movies with guest customers. Sounds familiar.
I was going to complain there was a lack of Bell Biv DeVoe references but Newt came in for the win.
I am a big fan of 80s and 90s R&B
I remember that old woman skin and bones song.
There was a woman all skin and bone
Oo-oo-oo!
She lived down by the old graveyard
Oo-oo-oo!
One night she thought she'd take a walk
Oo-oo-oo!
She walked down by the old graveyard
Oo-oo-oo!
She saw the bones that ran around
Oo-oo-oo!
She went to the closet to get her broom
Oo-oo-oo!
She opened the door and...
Boo!
thats the one
Oh man. My mom has always sung that to me around Halloween. I’ve never heard anyone else speak of it until now. Crazy.
Wrongfully Accused PLEASE TONY🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 the other store never reviewed it
Yall should do wild wild west too. Fo shizzle
WILD WILD WEST... JIM WEST... DESPERADO, ROUGH RIDER.... 🎶
Ayy I remember that Skin and bones song I loved it. I just listened to it again a month ago just for fun
should i stop typing Alien 3 into the UA-cam search bar?
Mib3 was Josh Brolin, not James
There's one thing I suspect; but can't confirm for Linda Fiorentino, is this bit of dialog in M.I.B when Laurel is trying to stall Edgar from leaving Earth. Dr. Weaver: 'You don't want to eat me. I'm a very important person on my planet. Like a queen, a goddess even. There are those who worship me. I'm not saying this to impress you, I'm just warning you it could start a war.' I wonder if Linda was referencing her dedicated fans of those erotic movies she did in between the more mainstream films. Makes sense to me.
I remember that Old Woman Skin and Bones song.
So....I now have mucho excuse to break out the soundtrack.
Newwwwwt daddddddy in the house!!!!! Fine assss redheadddddddd and tony!!! Woooooot watch how many views this gets!!!!!
I looked this up by name and it didn’t pop up on top
The lyrics are actually "my hat is like a sharks fin" lol
“Very cool.” 😂🤣😅