Don't talk to women online before you land in the Philippines, don't talk to the girls that message you first, and never give anyone an 'allowance'. There, you've avoided 90% of the grief.
Steve - I'm afraid I'm going to have to strongly disagree with you on that first one as you are basically just throwing out the baby with the bath water. I have been coming to Thailand and the Philippines for over 30 years now and I currently live in Thailand. Anyway, I figured out very early on that if I was only visiting a place for a few weeks at a time I needed to meet the women online first so that we could get to a point where things could move very quickly once I actually got there. I have dated a lot of women in this way over the years in many Asian countries and yet I have never had any problems with any of them whatsoever. Of course, this is primarily due to the fact I am very good at weeding out the undesirables long before I ever consider meeting them in person. Anyway, I can think of a few useful tips when using dating sites. First of all, if a girls ask for money before you even meet in person - especially if it very early on - then just move on immediately. Secondly if a girl starts calling you “honey” or “sweetie”, etc, right off the bat then there is more than a 95% chance that she is either a scammer after your money or is a Ladyboy. Also since I first started using dating sites over 20 years ago I have always had a rule about only giving people a week to have a video chat with me and if they make some excuses why they cannot do this I just move on - no exceptions. These can eliminate the obvious ones but you still need to be very, very good at reading people to weed out all potential scammers or crazies. As for not contacting girls who contact you first on dating sites (apps) the reason I never do this is because I am never attracted to any of them. And if one of them were to be extremely attractive and contacted me first she would likely be a scammer of course but I can easily sort this out very quickly. Its true that there are tons of scams on internet dating sites, particularly in the Philippines, and so if you don’t know how to easily spot them then I suppose just swearing off dating sites altogether might be advisable. I’m just glad that I have never falling into this category. Of course, if you were talking about total strangers adding you to their WhatsApp or Line and then asking how they know you, these are always scammers. They are usually financial scams and the scammers are based in China, although they will usually claim to be women of Asian decent who are now living in the USA or some other western country. As for not giving a girlfriend from Southeast Asia an allowance there is nothing wrong with doing so as long as you are good enough at reading people to know for sure that she is not with you for the money. I have never given any money to any of my former girlfriends in Southeast Asia despite knowing that they were not with me for the money but I sometimes feel guilty about this since some of them were from very poor backgrounds.
@@SLOBeachboy you make a lot of good points and I have to agree with you especially the one about meeting them online before you get there to kind of kick start the relationship. It really sucks when you meet a great woman 1/2 way through your 2 week stay.
I am married to a Filipina in Canada for 7 years and have visited the Philippines for 3 extended visits. Please gentleman be careful people will try and take advantage of you, no doubt and it gets old guick.
I just finished 5 weeks in Philippines no truer words were spoken I couldn't believe the # of filipinos will try and scam u I went back to Thailand so much better here
I married a Filipina in the Philippines and brought her to Alberta. Surprised and broken hearted when less than two years after learning how to adjust in Alberta, she didn't want to be married to me any longer and started screwing different Canadian guys. It's been 11 years since our divorce. She moved on so easily. No conscience it seems. I know I could never do that to somebody who did as much as I did for her and her family. When a Filipina doesn't need you anymore you are just garbage to be thrown away.
@@danielroydrawe Been there ...done that.... in Alaska in 2000-02...... gained more than i lost though which isn't saying much... She was never "All that" anyway 🙄
Your story about setting boundaries... I learned that lesson when I was about 40. Whether it's a GF, a date, a mate, or a boss, I DEMAND the same respect I show others. Life has been so smooth since then!
Yes, the "Filipino time" can be a nuisance. When I was still married to my Filipina wife, I solved that more or less the same way as you. We were going on a trip and we would take 3 of her Filipina friends with us. I knew about Filipina time and said to them: "I will pick you up in front of the church. I will be there at 1pm. I will wait a polite 15 minutes, but if you are not there at 1:15, I'm off!" They looked at me in disbelieve, but my wife said to them: "He means it!" They were all there at one o'clock. Setting bounderies is indeed very important with Filipinas!
So you're destroying their culture by making it more like what you expect from your cultural "norms." What do you think will happen when everyone there starts acting that way? It won't be "there" anymore, but what you left behind "here."
@@dinod-americaninthephilipp9238 Thanks for the comment. I understand the Filipino values very well, and that was actually the point of my comment. I hate to see traditional cultures overrun and destroyed by contamination from western social practices and "norms," as - in case you haven't had a chance to witness it - these western societies are almost complete disasters in most social respects, with the breakdown of the family causing major problems, massive stress killing people from heart attacks and all kinds of other lifestyle-related conditions, junk food diets wrecking people's health, and rampant materialism creating a frenetic "hurry up" and very "me-centered" mentality. Not to make this a sociological rant, but just saying that some of us are looking for places in the world with more natural and emotionally healthy cultural values to escape what we perceive to be the unhealthy mindset of a lot of western countries. So I think if anything we need to encourage more Filipino time, not less! ;-)
Anyone looking for love. LISTEN to this. Paul knows his stuff. They see you coming. Establish hard boundaries. You will still find someone. Just don’t leap at the first pair of batted eyelashes
I started my education in Thailand with a two year Long distance relationship (bank), I met my now wife of thirteen years online we chatted every day for twelve months before we met. I have been through the family emergencies, power bills etc... from the family. I have had the nine extras when we went to Manila shopping. I have bought her brother and sister to Australia. But she is the best thing that ever happened to me and stuck by me for five weeks in intensive care refusing to let them pull the plug, needed and received a lung transplant and she now works as a nurse and is the bread winner of the family. Everything you say is solid advice.
Yes, boundaries are good. I don't tolerate tampo. Tampo is just a woman believing a lie about you. Some filipinas stop the tampo and everything is good. Some won't and leave. by by.
I recently went down that path paved with good intentions. The return ticket to sanity was very expensive. Like you say the only one to blame was me. I knew better. I had lived in the Philippines for several years in my distant past so I definitely new better. An interesting story I might share some day.
It's funny Paul, I think we both are wired the same way. It's about respect, however they need to know what your expectations are. I did the internal struggle, and drove back home too. I was young then. I think part was my military training and that stayed with me. Remember the oxymoron in the military.. "Hurry Up And Wait" always happened marching everywhere 🤔 Now, the million dollar question I got to ask you four years later, If you say to BabyMae, "Let's Leave By Six" will BabyMae be ready by six? I bet a WiGo, she won't be ready. Haha Boundaries are very important. Especially for guys coming from the Western World to Asia. Suddenly you feel like it's 40 years ago. Easy to fall into denial. Here in Thailand, we know everybody to some degree and expense learned that, You Don't Need A Gun Pointed At You To Lose 30,40 50K. It's the shop, the car, the motorcycle, the gold jewelry or the house. Insert_____here. Guys want to be that Knight In Shinning Armour. Beware, Handsome Man. We are NOT the hunters we think we are. We are hunted, and the ladies set the traps, and know how to use them...
stay in your frame, walk the talk, fail fast when its not working so that you can be available and open for the right relationship to find its way to you. Easy to say but not always easy to do! Never stop working on your own personal development.
Great and realistic. Don't be the frog in a pot of water and be aware of the people who stand atop a mountain, with their mouth wide open waiting for a roast duck to fly in! Best of luck people.
Interesting thoughts and views Paul. Some of my ex girlfriends called me a jerk for setting boundaries about what I was and was not willing to put up with in regards to my hard earned money and my restricted time. Still to this day I am stern about those things. It's not being rude, it's just being real and finding out how much respect someone actually has for the smaller things in life as compared to the major things like the actual respect for your life. I think it's more of a phasing process, or a testing process for that matter. if they can't respect that it's your time and your money, they really aren't going to respect you for who you are as a person. it all ties together.
@My Big Fat Filipino Life Actually no that is not what I was talking about. I was talking about my own experiences I have had with former girlfriends who did not respect my time, and didn't care that the money in my pocket was mine, and not hers. I had to make personal boundaries when it came to new potential girlfriends from the experiences in the past. Just like Paul talked about in his video!
My solution to being late with my “ex wife” was if it was something that impacted her I never bothered to get ready until she came out ready to leave. Since it impacted her only, I figured why worry about it? If it impacted me, or our daughter, I let her know what time (tiempo Americano) I would leave and I did. If she was not ready she missed out. It didn’t fix the problem every time but it kept me from getting upset. But we were in the US where time is valued. When we visited her country I brought a book, and read till they were literally at the door ready to go then I would get up and off we went. I completely agree that if a man does not set boundaries and enforce them, he will never be respected.
I have been told a wise person learns from someone else's experience the average joe learns from their own experience and a fool repeats his mistakes. Thanks Paul for letting me learn from your experiences
🤚 I admit, I met my Filipina through Filipino Cupid. That was 4 years ago. The first 2 years we chatted on Skype. I went to the Philippines to meet her and we got along great! I was still working and planned to get together with her again in 2 years. Had my plane ticket, hotel room reserved and COVID hit. We still kept in touch (thru Skype) until last year. Finally retired from my toxic job. Bought a one way ticket to the P.I., we picked up where we left off and never looked back. We’re now living together. Things are going great! No complaints. I feel like got lucky for once in my life. I’d say for very guy out there we all handle relationships differently. For some it clicks. Others its takes a little work. And there are those that are total train wrecks. My point is, if your a single guy (re)entering the dating scene you’re going to have to take some risks. It’s the only way you’re going to find out if you made the right choice or not. Hey, best of luck to all the single gentleman out there. And remember the old saying; for every pot there’s a lid. Never give up guys.
@Vinnie Phillips, how many years living together? Do you feel any pressure to get married, build a house and have kids? Do you support her family financially, is there age gap? I see a lot of guys in their 50's and 60's hooking up with impoverished girls in there teens and 20's with a kid or two. As you mentioned there are risks and men shouldn't ignore it. I've heard to many stories where the relationship is going great UNTIL the Filipina starts expecting MORE. Such as marriage, a house and support for emergencies and her family etc... stay frosty and set real limits!
Paul your information is golden. Your delivery is even better. Said hello to you a few days ago. Appreciate your channel. Keep up the good work thank you very much.
Paul, in case no one has mentioned it up until now, your wisdom about all your topics really should be a road map for everyone that wants to come to the Philippines. There will be good and there will be bad, the key is to know when to see both and to react accordingly. Your previous topic of Expat John is and should be mandatory watching before people get to emotionally involved and get taken advantage of. Thanks again for another awesome video and your great missives...
im one of the crazy people that watches your vlog and i love it ...keep up the good work and soon you will be getting a silver plack from youtube 100k soon my friend , cheers
Probably the best story/personal experience I've heard from you, Paul, over the years. Turning up on time (a prearranged time) might seem like a small thing, but it's a mark of respect. I don't care about cultural differences. It's about basic respect for each other. Youy did absolutely the correct thing - as I would have done myself. If there is no mutual respect there is nothing.
It’s not just Filipino time. My sister-in-law from Ecuador was notorious for making us wait 15 - 30 It’s by the fact, she knew well in advance where we were supposed to be at a certain time she was habitually late I did the exact same thing that Paul did. We left her at the house after waiting five minutes guess what we never had to wait on her ever again. I laughed so hard when he told that store it was hilarious.
The thing is Paul to anyone seriously thinking of a move to the Philippines for whatever reason. There js no shortage of channels run by expats and and filipinas that provide first hand experiences that have gone well and not so well. The way I see it I'll take note I may not always agree with what's said but someone else has screwed up with best of intentions taken the lumps so I don't have to. I'd be a fool to ignore what they've said.
Call you don’t notice many videos as you used to but the quality of your videos have been increasing all the time and this one was a fantastic video thank you for sharing your life
Another great video Paul. I agree completely; quite frankly I don’t know how you waited 5 times before leaving I would have left on the 3rd for sure. Respect is earned and there must be mutual respect for a successful relationship. You are really making good videos with great content and lots of wisdom. I would love to meet yall someday. You just seem like you are a genuine friend.
Good Lecture Paul. It Doesn't Matter What Country You Live in Or What Country You Chose to Move to. Boundaries Are Necessary. Time Management is Necessary. I Have Kind of Always Been Like that. I'm Not a Huge Talker( Will Let You Know What I Expect To Happen). But I Refuse to Be Made to Wait. I Won't Be Disrespected, Cheated on , Or Stood Up. Not that I Have Never Been Cheated. It's Simply, I Learn Quickly , And Won't Allow it to Happen a Second or 3rd Time.
Paul. This may well be, the best presentation, of yours, that I've viewed. I got a much more in depth of you as a person. You also touched on some of the very thoughts I've had about reaching out to foreign opportunities. Thank you for cutting to the chase, and calling an ace an ace, and a spade a spade. Like you, I'm a realist!!
The entire relationship deal is luck. The scammers always have children. Read that carefully. I know when I post that, guys will ask; "Are you saying all women with children are scammers?" No, let's go over it again. All scammers have children. If you avoid the women with children and midgets (less than 5 foot tall), separated filipinas, or filipinas with children, you should be okay. Also you need to be convinced with her looks and she is physically affectionate. All the horror stories are involving filipinas with children. The out of the ordinary "positive stories" of women with children are in the miracle category. Keep in mind miracles are extremely rare. If you are hoping for a miracle, don't. What to do? Only pursue the single (not separated) filipinas without children. Is it a process? Nope. You need to get lucky. You get lucky or you don't. Chances are you won't. However you might.
Great message. Because listening is one of my best attributes, I set firm boundaries for myself and other when I was there and had a wonderful time. Vagueness and letting emotions run the show are huge mistakes. Thank you Paul
Great lecture, Dr. Paul. Setting boundaries in your relationships (girlfriend, siblings, friends) makes a difference in how you are treated. Set the boundaries when you get that feeling that you're not being respected. Use the words "im not being respected by you" and ask for what change in behavior you want from them. Good vlog by Paul.
I've experienced not only being disrespected but betrayal. You enter a very dangerous zone when you are Initially TOO kind and generous. Bare in mind that these people have the notion that you are rich and all the gifts and lavish offerings are considered just temporary and will not continue. Many expats have shared their ill experiences and like myself, you must take them seriously. I've not only been disrespected but emotionally hurt turning into anger. Be advised that you are on foreign soil and don't have rights to protect yourself. Without going into detail, my advise is to keep your head on a swivel and learn to say NO! Filipinos will seldom apologize and will always save face - almost always at your expense. Be safe friends.
Thanks always good to hear this, I'm still a couple years away from going first time and I like to keep these facts hammering in me. I'm not going for any women I just want to establish myself first in a decent place to stay and living within my budget month to month after that I may open myself for someone to share life with me, but in no rush what so ever. As I see it now its my retirement and No 1 comes first Me.
I made the decision to go there with no female greeting me. I'm going to Manila to spend a couple days at a 5 star hotel with a world class buffet. I love buffets because I like to chose by sight and smell. So I indulge a little, not often. Then I plan to go to Dumaguete so I can check out the area. I will go for 30 days my first trip and if I feel that it is a fit for me I will go long term. I plan to try to meet the local ex pats and hope to meet a couple of the bloggers I follow. I watch many but you, mae, Filipina Pea and 3 others are most watched. Agree with this video 100%. Am doing finances to be sure I have a steady $2000 a month because I don't want to just exist. That is actually the easy part. You have been a big help, thanks.
Algorithm loves you. I blink and you get another few thousand subscribers. Just as good today as when covid started and the world discovered your humor. I thank you for the years of entertaining videos
Maybe your best vid yet. Good enough to subscribe. A couple of points. Scamming, just like buying a very expensive car. Its almost impossible to get the new owner to admit he made a mistake purchasing the Cadillac when things start to break. The scammer has time. Often lots of time invested in the girl when the truth comes out. That's when the wishful thinking comes in. As for as young beautiful Filipino girls thinking old grey bald men are handsome? I don't know. Its a different culture. I tend to agree with your analysis, but its not my opinion that counts. Its the girls. Its hard to say. So what we're talking about is the ability to correctly judge sincerity at a time when there may be incentive to show otherwise. I would encourage you to do more on this subject. Maybe dig a little deeper. Good job! Thanks Paul.
Hi Paul, it sounds like what we Americans call being a gentlemen sometimes gets confused as a sign of weakness, your advice and shared experiences really help. I'm super happy you met Mae after your first relationship didn't work, you two are great for each other, I believe finding love is like a treasure hunt, if you don't find it at the first spot on the map don't be afraid to keep looking even if your treasure hunt takes you to other countries.
Great advice, Paul. I think being clear and honest and actually saying what you want and expect is how to be. If the girl doesn’t appreciate it, move on. The right girl will love the clear direction.
Hey Paul my dear friend, You did absolutely did the right thing. I'm happy that you and Baby Mae got everything resolved with that issue. Filipino time can be very frustrating. My wife knows that I am the same way. When I ask her to be ready at a certain time, she knows that if she is not ready, I will leave without her. as a matter of fact, she is now ready before I am most of the time. Thank you Paul my dear friend for sharing this awesome video. Please stay safe and healthy. And God bless you, Baby Mae, Riza, Jennifer, and your sweet little puppy.🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂
Good Words of wisdom Paul, good that you recognized your "sorroundings".....and being a player in Life, helps you navigate "the game of Life". This one is for You out there........"If you think that you picked up the lady you are "dating"...(!?) You are wrong...., The lady picked you Up out of the Line up".
Awesome video Paul ! You did an excellent job of bringing reality to life. As much as we’d all like to live in fantasy. Fantasy can be way too expensive and painful by the time you figure it out. I appreciate your insight and experience and hopefully people will heed your advice and not have to live through it for themselves. Wishful thinking is very powerful and unfortunately clouds your ability to see reality. Thanks again Paul for a great video.
I think you are 100% correct in your observations. Especially at 12:00 when talking about paying for others time and enjoyment, I see this all the time with the 2 week millionaires in Thailand. You can't buy love or respect, rather you just get taken advantage of by the ladies.
Very well-done video. Yes, it is always the same you on the couch and your chicken buddy behind you LOL. But today's topic was good and I especially liked the final statement
Bless you, Paul. Thank you Once again for the great words of experienced wisdom about being and living in the Philippines. Once again, you've been a jewel for all that might want to go there. 🐓
Well Paul...nice title, but as usual, an unfocused, meandering, tangential plethora of off-topic and very useful information. Love it. Love you guys. Now, next upload should be about retiring on social assistance ....yes? LOL
Lol 😂 Paul, you and baby Mae remind me so much of me and my Filipina. We have been together for two years and when we were first talking we would set a time to chat on the phone and I would call and she would be working or she would be talking with her friends while I was on the phone with her. I could never talk to her about anything private. I asked her several times “that if she wants to visit with her friends or work then let’s set another time” and she would say “ ok” then I call, and same old BS and it’s hard to speak to someone when 10 other people all wanted to talk to me and ask me thousands of questions. Finally, I decided the next time I call her and we have made plans to chat and I specifically said I want it to be just her and I speaking together that if she is working or has her group of friends that I would just say goodbye and hang up the phone and not call her until she called me back. I did this and sure enough she called me right back and I said “ I can’t speak to you because it’s not private and maybe I should look for one of the 1000’s on the dating sight to speak with. I said visit with your friends and when you want a mature conversation ALONE give me a call. 5 minutes later I get another phone call and she is off by herself and we never had another issue with it again. I explained to her I don’t mind talking with her friends but when I say I want a personal call with you, I mean it and that’s not an invitation to all of your friends and family to join in. As for the money being paid for others my Filipina tells them ALL NO, even before I can say anything lol it always makes me laugh when she does it, but she will say “ that is not something you want to get started because it will be expected every time !”
Thank you for sharing your experiences/stories! Regardless if I end up in Philippines (or anywhere else) you’ve had a positive impact on myself (and I’m certain many others) which will be helpful!
Setting boundaries and sticking to them is important regardless where you live. I simply won’t let someone walk all over me. I too learned that the hard way.
Paul your funny!!! I get a kick out of your u tube channel. Very honest and full of good information. Keep up the good work. i'm currently in Butuan Philippines. And finding out what u say is so true. Thanks !!!!
Another great one Paul. I have a question. Have you always been so jolly and happy? In all your vids you laugh and smile alot, very refreshing. I used to be that way but over the last couple of years here in the states my laughter and smile just not like it was. In other words just not happy here with the way things are going in the US
Very Good Video Paul 📹 👍 👌 👏. You are very instrumental with your Intel with my future transition to the Philippines 🇵🇭. Utmost respect for you Sir Paul 👍. Poor Gaylord is tuckered out, lol 😆 😂 🤣. Stay Safe 💕 💞 🙏 🙏
Love Paul's mindset. Grew up in the Philippines, agreed time is usually up to an hour later which was fine and normal back there. Depends on the setting. 15-20 mins is nothing. So usually I ask if we are talking Filipino time or American time.
I love these types of story's, they are entertaining, detailed, I can picture it in my mind, your awesome humor, and I learn a lot from them...Thank you.!
Feeling you, Paul. Cultures, as our beloved Filipina Pea often shares, are very different. Imagine driving in Europe or North America as we must do when we're in the Philippines? Time management is similar - Filipinos don't get upset about being late, whereas we find it an affront. As your story shows it's possible to distil the best of both worlds, but man that involves some heat!!! But in my case and yours, it's worth it.
I have been married to Filipinas twice that worked ok with the first wife but every time I did that with the second there was a big fight. Now with the girl friend there is always a big argument she expects me to wait for hours but she gets upset after 5 minutes. Yes after 40 yeasrs and many Filipinas I know how to handle this. You give very good advice for someone that doesn't give advice.
Such sagely advice... ✅💛 Hoping all is well Paul...🤜🏻💥🤛🏻 hello to Baby Mae.... 🙏🏻 It's crazy when I think that I've been following you since September of 2018.... It's been a wonderful adventure so far so good... One of these days soon I hope to meet y'all... Literally dream about the Philippines... I have that take away in my mind of no expectations and no wishful thinking.
I am the same way. I told all my friends you can depend on me. If am late I am in the hospital 🏥 or dead and I expect the same respect from you. Good luck, Mike in the USA 🇺🇸
Boundaries and respect. Guys need to establish those before embarking in any relationship. Thank you for sharing your backstory. All the best to you and BM.
This is a good video. I'll keep in mind that the Philippines seems like Paradise but actually is not. Great advice about respect, you were spot on by leaving after getting stuck in the sun several times. It's all around better if people respect each other and their time.
I was on a dating site, I posted about not to look for gold as you would not find gold here and it seemed to work. I found some gals very stand off ish at first then they started chatting. I recall a rule my friends wife gave me as she was a Filipina, she said if a gal asks for money within the first 6 months, drop her and run, and so I did that, I was only ever asked twice, dropped them, moved on and I did meet my wife on the site before we met in person. I think it’s just like you say Paul, keep your boundaries, set rules for yourself even. It’s great hearing your stories, keep up the great work.
Like your new couch cover! Paul great point regarding all relationships and in ANY country, "Set Your Boundaries". I must admit that I thought your video would be more centric on being able to live and retire in the Philippines on SS. The key word being LIVE to experience life in the PI: periodic vacations, going out, eating, quality of life, decent home, variety of foods, creature comforts, etc. on SS income. I have have seen where some people are able to surive/exist on their SS in the PI, but the are not LIVING life or enjoying the country (stay home, do nothing, recluse, etc.), but unfortunately don't have any remaining excess money set aside for the rainy day funds when unexpected expenses occur due to health, hospital bills, etc.
Hi Paul enjoyed the video some good advise I know from your previous videos you dont like to give advise but indirectly you do any hopefully I can meet you one day and buy you a coffee or two keep the videos coming
And when you set boundaries and she does not honor them, you have to face the realization that she does not respect you and, if you stay with her, your problems have only just started. I am talking to myself out loud.
Same here. The problems only grow. Dealt with it for 20 years of growing problems. And though we had a wonderful son, I would have preferred to have him with a Filipina that I had a quality relationship with.
Hey Paul, another great video. I am traveling in the Phils now. Mactan Newtown for another week then Bohol. Then I will make the seeming obligatory trip to Duma. Maybe I catch you at Ground Zero about Feb 1 or so
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience!
Don't talk to women online before you land in the Philippines, don't talk to the girls that message you first, and never give anyone an 'allowance'. There, you've avoided 90% of the grief.
If not more than 90%.
Steve - I'm afraid I'm going to have to strongly disagree with you on that first one as you are basically just throwing out the baby with the bath water. I have been coming to Thailand and the Philippines for over 30 years now and I currently live in Thailand. Anyway, I figured out very early on that if I was only visiting a place for a few weeks at a time I needed to meet the women online first so that we could get to a point where things could move very quickly once I actually got there. I have dated a lot of women in this way over the years in many Asian countries and yet I have never had any problems with any of them whatsoever. Of course, this is primarily due to the fact I am very good at weeding out the undesirables long before I ever consider meeting them in person. Anyway, I can think of a few useful tips when using dating sites. First of all, if a girls ask for money before you even meet in person - especially if it very early on - then just move on immediately. Secondly if a girl starts calling you “honey” or “sweetie”, etc, right off the bat then there is more than a 95% chance that she is either a scammer after your money or is a Ladyboy. Also since I first started using dating sites over 20 years ago I have always had a rule about only giving people a week to have a video chat with me and if they make some excuses why they cannot do this I just move on - no exceptions. These can eliminate the obvious ones but you still need to be very, very good at reading people to weed out all potential scammers or crazies.
As for not contacting girls who contact you first on dating sites (apps) the reason I never do this is because I am never attracted to any of them. And if one of them were to be extremely attractive and contacted me first she would likely be a scammer of course but I can easily sort this out very quickly. Its true that there are tons of scams on internet dating sites, particularly in the Philippines, and so if you don’t know how to easily spot them then I suppose just swearing off dating sites altogether might be advisable. I’m just glad that I have never falling into this category. Of course, if you were talking about total strangers adding you to their WhatsApp or Line and then asking how they know you, these are always scammers. They are usually financial scams and the scammers are based in China, although they will usually claim to be women of Asian decent who are now living in the USA or some other western country.
As for not giving a girlfriend from Southeast Asia an allowance there is nothing wrong with doing so as long as you are good enough at reading people to know for sure that she is not with you for the money. I have never given any money to any of my former girlfriends in Southeast Asia despite knowing that they were not with me for the money but I sometimes feel guilty about this since some of them were from very poor backgrounds.
@@SLOBeachboy you make a lot of good points and I have to agree with you especially the one about meeting them online before you get there to kind of kick start the relationship. It really sucks when you meet a great woman 1/2 way through your 2 week stay.
@@SLOBeachboy 👍
✅✅✅
I am married to a Filipina in Canada for 7 years and have visited the Philippines for 3 extended visits. Please gentleman be careful people will try and take advantage of you, no doubt and it gets old guick.
Sir, What made you and your Filipina reside in Canada versus the Phils?
@@man4YAWEH454 call a great job for her and him.
I just finished 5 weeks in Philippines no truer words were spoken I couldn't believe the # of filipinos will try and scam u I went back to Thailand so much better here
I married a Filipina in the Philippines and brought her to Alberta. Surprised and broken hearted when less than two years after learning how to adjust in Alberta, she didn't want to be married to me any longer and started screwing different Canadian guys. It's been 11 years since our divorce. She moved on so easily. No conscience it seems. I know I could never do that to somebody who did as much as I did for her and her family. When a Filipina doesn't need you anymore you are just garbage to be thrown away.
@@danielroydrawe Been there ...done that.... in Alaska in 2000-02...... gained more than i lost though which isn't saying much... She was never "All that" anyway 🙄
Your story about setting boundaries... I learned that lesson when I was about 40. Whether it's a GF, a date, a mate, or a boss, I DEMAND the same respect I show others. Life has been so smooth since then!
The good ol' international Golden Rule must apply.
Yes, the "Filipino time" can be a nuisance. When I was still married to my Filipina wife, I solved that more or less the same way as you. We were going on a trip and we would take 3 of her Filipina friends with us. I knew about Filipina time and said to them: "I will pick you up in front of the church. I will be there at 1pm. I will wait a polite 15 minutes, but if you are not there at 1:15, I'm off!" They looked at me in disbelieve, but my wife said to them: "He means it!" They were all there at one o'clock. Setting bounderies is indeed very important with Filipinas!
Is that the same as Jewish Standard Time? Just kidding
So you're destroying their culture by making it more like what you expect from your cultural "norms." What do you think will happen when everyone there starts acting that way? It won't be "there" anymore, but what you left behind "here."
@@ricklanders It was "here"! This happened in Belgium!
@@homebasebelgium359 Ok, in that case you're good ;-)
@@dinod-americaninthephilipp9238 Thanks for the comment. I understand the Filipino values very well, and that was actually the point of my comment. I hate to see traditional cultures overrun and destroyed by contamination from western social practices and "norms," as - in case you haven't had a chance to witness it - these western societies are almost complete disasters in most social respects, with the breakdown of the family causing major problems, massive stress killing people from heart attacks and all kinds of other lifestyle-related conditions, junk food diets wrecking people's health, and rampant materialism creating a frenetic "hurry up" and very "me-centered" mentality. Not to make this a sociological rant, but just saying that some of us are looking for places in the world with more natural and emotionally healthy cultural values to escape what we perceive to be the unhealthy mindset of a lot of western countries. So I think if anything we need to encourage more Filipino time, not less! ;-)
Anyone looking for love. LISTEN to this. Paul knows his stuff. They see you coming. Establish hard boundaries. You will still find someone. Just don’t leap at the first pair of batted eyelashes
I started my education in Thailand with a two year Long distance relationship (bank), I met my now wife of thirteen years online we chatted every day for twelve months before we met. I have been through the family emergencies, power bills etc... from the family. I have had the nine extras when we went to Manila shopping. I have bought her brother and sister to Australia. But she is the best thing that ever happened to me and stuck by me for five weeks in intensive care refusing to let them pull the plug, needed and received a lung transplant and she now works as a nurse and is the bread winner of the family. Everything you say is solid advice.
You are blessed. I am still navigating Asia and I hope to meet that true Thai lady or Filipina. I hope you are doing fine with your second chance.
Yes, I believe they are the Tribe of Levi. For God all the way, in the human sense. Their core is GOD AND GOOD.
Holy crap Paul, it's always good to learn from others' experiences.
Don't be a hero and set boundaries. Got it, excellent!
Yes, boundaries are good. I don't tolerate tampo. Tampo is just a woman believing a lie about you. Some filipinas stop the tampo and everything is good. Some won't and leave. by by.
I recently went down that path paved with good intentions. The return ticket to sanity was very expensive. Like you say the only one to blame was me. I knew better. I had lived in the Philippines for several years in my distant past so I definitely new better. An interesting story I might share some day.
That’s good that you learned. Yes you made choices but so did she aka it takes 2 to tango.
It's funny Paul, I think we both are wired the same way. It's about respect, however they need to know what your expectations are. I did the internal struggle, and drove back home too. I was young then. I think part was my military training and that stayed with me. Remember the oxymoron in the military.. "Hurry Up And Wait" always happened marching everywhere 🤔
Now, the million dollar question I got to ask you four years later, If you say to BabyMae, "Let's Leave By Six" will BabyMae be ready by six? I bet a WiGo, she won't be ready. Haha
Boundaries are very important. Especially for guys coming from the Western World to Asia. Suddenly you feel like it's 40 years ago. Easy to fall into denial. Here in Thailand, we know everybody to some degree and expense learned that, You Don't Need A Gun Pointed At You To Lose 30,40 50K. It's the shop, the car, the motorcycle, the gold jewelry or the house. Insert_____here. Guys want to be that Knight In Shinning Armour.
Beware, Handsome Man. We are NOT the hunters we think we are. We are hunted, and the ladies set the traps, and know how to use them...
That is a perfect analogy. We ARE the hunted and they know exactly how to trap us
Occasional pay for play is the way for me.. I got better shit to do than pander daily to women.
*Crap Game*
stay in your frame, walk the talk, fail fast when its not working so that you can be available and open for the right relationship to find its way to you. Easy to say but not always easy to do! Never stop working on your own personal development.
Great and realistic. Don't be the frog in a pot of water and be aware of the people who stand atop a mountain, with their mouth wide open waiting for a roast duck to fly in! Best of luck people.
@@dinod-americaninthephilipp9238 No is my favorite word. Say no early for more peace and less drama. It also drives away the parasites.
Interesting thoughts and views Paul.
Some of my ex girlfriends called me a jerk for setting boundaries about what I was and was not willing to put up with in regards to my hard earned money and my restricted time. Still to this day I am stern about those things. It's not being rude, it's just being real and finding out how much respect someone actually has for the smaller things in life as compared to the major things like the actual respect for your life. I think it's more of a phasing process, or a testing process for that matter. if they can't respect that it's your time and your money, they really aren't going to respect you for who you are as a person. it all ties together.
@My Big Fat Filipino Life Actually no that is not what I was talking about. I was talking about my own experiences I have had with former girlfriends who did not respect my time, and didn't care that the money in my pocket was mine, and not hers. I had to make personal boundaries when it came to new potential girlfriends from the experiences in the past. Just like Paul talked about in his video!
My solution to being late with my “ex wife” was if it was something that impacted her I never bothered to get ready until she came out ready to leave. Since it impacted her only, I figured why worry about it? If it impacted me, or our daughter, I let her know what time (tiempo Americano) I would leave and I did. If she was not ready she missed out. It didn’t fix the problem every time but it kept me from getting upset. But we were in the US where time is valued. When we visited her country I brought a book, and read till they were literally at the door ready to go then I would get up and off we went. I completely agree that if a man does not set boundaries and enforce them, he will never be respected.
You Sir are the REAL deal: as such, I have subscribed. Keeping it real is not what others do. Thank you.
I have been told a wise person learns from someone else's experience the average joe learns from their own experience and a fool repeats his mistakes. Thanks Paul for letting me learn from your experiences
🤚 I admit, I met my Filipina through Filipino Cupid. That was 4 years ago. The first 2 years we chatted on Skype. I went to the Philippines to meet her and we got along great! I was still working and planned to get together with her again in 2 years. Had my plane ticket, hotel room reserved and COVID hit. We still kept in touch (thru Skype) until last year. Finally retired from my toxic job. Bought a one way ticket to the P.I., we picked up where we left off and never looked back. We’re now living together. Things are going great! No complaints. I feel like got lucky for once in my life.
I’d say for very guy out there we all handle relationships differently. For some it clicks. Others its takes a little work. And there are those that are total train wrecks. My point is, if your a single guy (re)entering the dating scene you’re going to have to take some risks. It’s the only way you’re going to find out if you made the right choice or not.
Hey, best of luck to all the single gentleman out there. And remember the old saying; for every pot there’s a lid. Never give up guys.
@Vinnie Phillips, how many years living together? Do you feel any pressure to get married, build a house and have kids? Do you support her family financially, is there age gap? I see a lot of guys in their 50's and 60's hooking up with impoverished girls in there teens and 20's with a kid or two. As you mentioned there are risks and men shouldn't ignore it. I've heard to many stories where the relationship is going great UNTIL the Filipina starts expecting MORE. Such as marriage, a house and support for emergencies and her family etc... stay frosty and set real limits!
Paul your information is golden. Your delivery is even better. Said hello to you a few days ago. Appreciate your channel. Keep up the good work thank you very much.
Paul, in case no one has mentioned it up until now, your wisdom about all your topics really should be a road map for everyone that wants to come to the Philippines. There will be good and there will be bad, the key is to know when to see both and to react accordingly. Your previous topic of Expat John is and should be mandatory watching before people get to emotionally involved and get taken advantage of.
Thanks again for another awesome video and your great missives...
Well put kid. I liked it. 👍 That's a GOLD STAR for you. Thanx for the tip !
That was a good one Paul. I let the advertisements run till they've finished hope that helps financially for you.
im one of the crazy people that watches your vlog and i love it ...keep up the good work and soon you will be getting a silver plack from youtube 100k soon my friend , cheers
Probably the best story/personal experience I've heard from you, Paul, over the years. Turning up on time (a prearranged time) might seem like a small thing, but it's a mark of respect. I don't care about cultural differences. It's about basic respect for each other. Youy did absolutely the correct thing - as I would have done myself. If there is no mutual respect there is nothing.
Hey Paul, great timing I just got here. Thanks for sharing man!
It’s not just Filipino time. My sister-in-law from Ecuador was notorious for making us wait 15 - 30 It’s by the fact, she knew well in advance where we were supposed to be at a certain time she was habitually late I did the exact same thing that Paul did. We left her at the house after waiting five minutes guess what we never had to wait on her ever again. I laughed so hard when he told that store it was hilarious.
As an Ecuadorian I find this to be true! 🕤⏰⏳⌛
The thing is Paul to anyone seriously thinking of a move to the Philippines for whatever reason.
There js no shortage of channels run by expats and and filipinas that provide first hand experiences that have gone well and not so well.
The way I see it I'll take note I may not always agree with what's said but someone else has screwed up with best of intentions taken the lumps so I don't have to. I'd be a fool to ignore what they've said.
The best advice you could ever give. I've experienced the same. Fiipinas learn fast when boundries are set. I can attest. Thanks for sharing.
Call you don’t notice many videos as you used to but the quality of your videos have been increasing all the time and this one was a fantastic video thank you for sharing your life
Another great video Paul. I agree completely; quite frankly I don’t know how you waited 5 times before leaving I would have left on the 3rd for sure. Respect is earned and there must be mutual respect for a successful relationship. You are really making good videos with great content and lots of wisdom. I would love to meet yall someday. You just seem like you are a genuine friend.
Good Lecture Paul.
It Doesn't Matter What Country You Live in Or What Country You Chose to Move to. Boundaries Are Necessary.
Time Management is Necessary.
I Have Kind of Always Been Like that. I'm Not a Huge Talker( Will Let You Know What I Expect To Happen). But I Refuse to Be Made to Wait. I Won't Be Disrespected, Cheated on , Or Stood Up.
Not that I Have Never Been Cheated. It's Simply, I Learn Quickly , And Won't Allow it to Happen a Second or 3rd Time.
Paul, you're gold! You've a real sense of charm, with your laid-back storytelling - with many a word of wisdom therein
Paul. This may well be, the best presentation, of yours, that I've viewed. I got a much more in depth of you as a person. You also touched on some of the very thoughts I've had about reaching out to foreign opportunities. Thank you for cutting to the chase, and calling an ace an ace, and a spade a spade. Like you, I'm a realist!!
Hey Paul and Baby Mae! Great data brother! Thank you for sharing and God bless!
The entire relationship deal is luck. The scammers always have children. Read that carefully. I know when I post that, guys will ask; "Are you saying all women with children are scammers?" No, let's go over it again. All scammers have children. If you avoid the women with children and
midgets (less than 5 foot tall), separated filipinas, or filipinas with children, you should be okay. Also you need to be convinced with her looks and she is physically affectionate. All the horror stories are involving filipinas with children.
The out of the ordinary "positive stories" of women with children are in the miracle category. Keep in mind miracles are extremely rare. If you are hoping for a miracle, don't.
What to do? Only pursue the single (not separated) filipinas without children. Is it a process? Nope. You need to get lucky. You get lucky or you don't. Chances are you won't. However you might.
Great message. Because listening is one of my best attributes, I set firm boundaries for myself and other when I was there and had a wonderful time. Vagueness and letting emotions run the show are huge mistakes. Thank you Paul
Great lecture, Dr. Paul. Setting boundaries in your relationships (girlfriend, siblings, friends) makes a difference in how you are treated. Set the boundaries when you get that feeling that you're not being respected. Use the words "im not being respected by you" and ask for what change in behavior you want from them. Good vlog by Paul.
I've experienced not only being disrespected but betrayal. You enter a very dangerous zone when you are Initially TOO kind and generous. Bare in mind that these people have the notion that you are rich and all the gifts and lavish offerings are considered just temporary and will not continue. Many expats have shared their ill experiences
and like myself, you must take them seriously. I've not only been disrespected but emotionally hurt turning into anger. Be advised that you are on foreign soil and don't have rights to protect yourself.
Without going into detail, my advise is to keep your head on a swivel and learn to say NO! Filipinos will seldom apologize and will always save face - almost always at your expense. Be safe friends.
Thanks always good to hear this, I'm still a couple years away from going first time and I like to keep these facts hammering in me. I'm not going for any women I just want to establish myself first in a decent place to stay and living within my budget month to month after that I may open myself for someone to share life with me, but in no rush what so ever. As I see it now its my retirement and No 1 comes first Me.
Great Video Paul , truth ,wisdom and common sense will always make a compeling video.This is your gifting .
Great story with a powerful message on self-respect and boundaries. Cheers
I made the decision to go there with no female greeting me. I'm going to Manila to spend a couple days at a 5 star hotel with a world class buffet. I love buffets because I like to chose by sight and smell. So I indulge a little, not often. Then I plan to go to Dumaguete so I can check out the area. I will go for 30 days my first trip and if I feel that it is a fit for me I will go long term. I plan to try to meet the local ex pats and hope to meet a couple of the bloggers I follow. I watch many but you, mae, Filipina Pea and 3 others are most watched. Agree with this video 100%. Am doing finances to be sure I have a steady $2000 a month because I don't want to just exist. That is actually the easy part. You have been a big help, thanks.
Algorithm loves you. I blink and you get another few thousand subscribers. Just as good today as when covid started and the world discovered your humor. I thank you for the years of entertaining videos
Maybe your best vid yet. Good enough to subscribe. A couple of points. Scamming, just like buying a very expensive car. Its almost impossible to get the new owner to admit he made a mistake purchasing the Cadillac when things start to break. The scammer has time. Often lots of time invested in the girl when the truth comes out. That's when the wishful thinking comes in. As for as young beautiful Filipino girls thinking old grey bald men are handsome? I don't know. Its a different culture. I tend to agree with your analysis, but its not my opinion that counts. Its the girls. Its hard to say. So what we're talking about is the ability to correctly judge sincerity at a time when there may be incentive to show otherwise. I would encourage you to do more on this subject. Maybe dig a little deeper. Good job! Thanks Paul.
Nice thought sir paul.everything you said were true and very informative.
Hi Paul! Watching from Canada 🇨🇦, its been a while I didn’t heard from your video. Thanks your back.
Hi Paul, it sounds like what we Americans call being a gentlemen sometimes gets confused as a sign of weakness, your advice and shared experiences really help. I'm super happy you met Mae after your first relationship didn't work, you two are great for each other, I believe finding love is like a treasure hunt, if you don't find it at the first spot on the map don't be afraid to keep looking even if your treasure hunt takes you to other countries.
Interesting, "put the foot down" and you end up with a different outcome. Excellent advice, no matter where you are.
Great advice, Paul. I think being clear and honest and actually saying what you want and expect is how to be. If the girl doesn’t appreciate it, move on. The right girl will love the clear direction.
Hey Paul my dear friend, You did absolutely did the right thing. I'm happy that you and Baby Mae got everything resolved with that issue. Filipino time can be very frustrating. My wife knows that I am the same way. When I ask her to be ready at a certain time, she knows that if she is not ready, I will leave without her. as a matter of fact, she is now ready before I am most of the time. Thank you Paul my dear friend for sharing this awesome video. Please stay safe and healthy. And God bless you, Baby Mae, Riza, Jennifer, and your sweet little puppy.🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂
Good Words of wisdom Paul, good that you recognized your "sorroundings".....and being a player in Life, helps you navigate "the game of Life". This one is for You out there........"If you think that you picked up the lady you are "dating"...(!?) You are wrong...., The lady picked you Up out of the Line up".
Awesome video Paul ! You did an excellent job of bringing reality to life. As much as we’d all like to live in fantasy. Fantasy can be way too expensive and painful by the time you figure it out. I appreciate your insight and experience and hopefully people will heed your advice and not have to live through it for themselves. Wishful thinking is very powerful and unfortunately clouds your ability to see reality. Thanks again Paul for a great video.
Glad you enjoyed it
@@paulinthephilippinesolddog9234 just discovered your channel. Is there any way I can get a private message to you?
Man, you make me laugh! So I keep coming back for more, like a vlog junkie... 🤣
Keep up the good work! 👍
I like your humility and honesty. I really think you are a good guy
I think you are 100% correct in your observations. Especially at 12:00 when talking about paying for others time and enjoyment, I see this all the time with the 2 week millionaires in Thailand. You can't buy love or respect, rather you just get taken advantage of by the ladies.
2 week millionaires = washed up old fat losers
Thanks Paul. Your experience is a welcomed man to man pep talk that can help some that are not even in the Phil. Keep up the good work.
Very well-done video. Yes, it is always the same you on the couch and your chicken buddy behind you LOL. But today's topic was good and I especially liked the final statement
Another great video I always enjoy when take time to watch 🥰
Bless you, Paul. Thank you Once again for the great words of experienced wisdom about being and living in the Philippines. Once again, you've been a jewel for all that might want to go there. 🐓
Good one -- Mutual Respect is the most important element!...
Well Paul...nice title, but as usual, an unfocused, meandering, tangential plethora of off-topic and very useful information. Love it. Love you guys. Now, next upload should be about retiring on social assistance ....yes? LOL
Great video agin Paul. I am sure gonna give your words a thought.
Great story Paul ,glad it worked out well 🎉
Lol 😂 Paul, you and baby Mae remind me so much of me and my Filipina. We have been together for two years and when we were first talking we would set a time to chat on the phone and I would call and she would be working or she would be talking with her friends while I was on the phone with her. I could never talk to her about anything private. I asked her several times “that if she wants to visit with her friends or work then let’s set another time” and she would say “ ok” then I call, and same old BS and it’s hard to speak to someone when 10 other people all wanted to talk to me and ask me thousands of questions. Finally, I decided the next time I call her and we have made plans to chat and I specifically said I want it to be just her and I speaking together that if she is working or has her group of friends that I would just say goodbye and hang up the phone and not call her until she called me back. I did this and sure enough she called me right back and I said “ I can’t speak to you because it’s not private and maybe I should look for one of the 1000’s on the dating sight to speak with. I said visit with your friends and when you want a mature conversation ALONE give me a call. 5 minutes later I get another phone call and she is off by herself and we never had another issue with it again. I explained to her I don’t mind talking with her friends but when I say I want a personal call with you, I mean it and that’s not an invitation to all of your friends and family to join in. As for the money being paid for others my Filipina tells them ALL NO, even before I can say anything lol it always makes me laugh when she does it, but she will say “ that is not something you want to get started because it will be expected every time !”
One thing I like about you, Mark, etc. You tell the truth ... you are honest.
So true wishful thinking can't and won't cut it in these times, great video bro.
Thank you for sharing your experiences/stories! Regardless if I end up in Philippines (or anywhere else) you’ve had a positive impact on myself (and I’m certain many others) which will be helpful!
Setting boundaries and sticking to them is important regardless where you live. I simply won’t let someone walk all over me. I too learned that the hard way.
Paul your funny!!! I get a kick out of your u tube channel. Very honest and full of good information. Keep up the good work. i'm currently in Butuan Philippines. And finding out what u say is so true. Thanks !!!!
You nailed it Paul.Thanks for sharing.
Best video for a long time. Back on form. 👍
Great job Paul. Great honesty and commentary. Hope to meet you when I come in March.
Another great one Paul. I have a question. Have you always been so jolly and happy? In all your vids you laugh and smile alot, very refreshing. I used to be that way but over the last couple of years here in the states my laughter and smile just not like it was. In other words just not happy here with the way things are going in the US
Very Good Video Paul 📹 👍 👌 👏. You are very instrumental with your Intel with my future transition to the Philippines 🇵🇭. Utmost respect for you Sir Paul 👍.
Poor Gaylord is tuckered out, lol 😆 😂 🤣.
Stay Safe 💕 💞 🙏 🙏
Congralation. You make the right decision. There are lots of people in this world will take advantage of your kindness its to you to handle.
Love Paul's mindset. Grew up in the Philippines, agreed time is usually up to an hour later which was fine and normal back there. Depends on the setting. 15-20 mins is nothing.
So usually I ask if we are talking Filipino time or American time.
Thanks for another insightful vlog. You always shoot straight.👍👍👍
Great video & advice Paul. Applies to people all around the world, not just Philippines.
Thanks Paul. That story about Baby Mae disrespecting you really struck home for me.
I love these types of story's, they are entertaining, detailed, I can picture it in my mind, your awesome humor, and I learn a lot from them...Thank you.!
Feeling you, Paul. Cultures, as our beloved Filipina Pea often shares, are very different. Imagine driving in Europe or North America as we must do when we're in the Philippines? Time management is similar - Filipinos don't get upset about being late, whereas we find it an affront. As your story shows it's possible to distil the best of both worlds, but man that involves some heat!!! But in my case and yours, it's worth it.
Guys, that are watching paul..he has alote of great information and knows the Phil's.
I have been married to Filipinas twice that worked ok with the first wife but every time I did that with the second there was a big fight. Now with the girl friend there is always a big argument she expects me to wait for hours but she gets upset after 5 minutes. Yes after 40 yeasrs and many Filipinas I know how to handle this. You give very good advice for someone that doesn't give advice.
Such sagely advice... ✅💛
Hoping all is well Paul...🤜🏻💥🤛🏻
hello to Baby Mae.... 🙏🏻
It's crazy when I think that I've been following you since September of 2018.... It's been a wonderful adventure so far so good... One of these days soon I hope to meet y'all... Literally dream about the Philippines... I have that take away in my mind of no expectations and no wishful thinking.
The problems that exist in the Philippines also exist in the United States. It's just a lot cheaper in the Philippines to deal with them.
There are plans to do away with All pensions and ownership of property. The Globalists must be stopped.
Funny but true 😄
Facts
I am the same way. I told all my friends you can depend on me. If am late I am in the hospital 🏥 or dead and I expect the same respect from you. Good luck, Mike in the USA 🇺🇸
Boundaries and respect. Guys need to establish those before embarking in any relationship. Thank you for sharing your backstory. All the best to you and BM.
Our pleasure!
This is a good video. I'll keep in mind that the Philippines seems like Paradise but actually is not. Great advice about respect, you were spot on by leaving after getting stuck in the sun several times. It's all around better if people respect each other and their time.
Paul...very good presentation. Some men let themselves become so vulnerable that they ignore all the warning signs.
I was on a dating site, I posted about not to look for gold as you would not find gold here and it seemed to work. I found some gals very stand off ish at first then they started chatting. I recall a rule my friends wife gave me as she was a Filipina, she said if a gal asks for money within the first 6 months, drop her and run, and so I did that, I was only ever asked twice, dropped them, moved on and I did meet my wife on the site before we met in person. I think it’s just like you say Paul, keep your boundaries, set rules for yourself even. It’s great hearing your stories, keep up the great work.
Like your new couch cover! Paul great point regarding all relationships and in ANY country, "Set Your Boundaries". I must admit that I thought your video would be more centric on being able to live and retire in the Philippines on SS. The key word being LIVE to experience life in the PI: periodic vacations, going out, eating, quality of life, decent home, variety of foods, creature comforts, etc. on SS income. I have have seen where some people are able to surive/exist on their SS in the PI, but the are not LIVING life or enjoying the country (stay home, do nothing, recluse, etc.), but unfortunately don't have any remaining excess money set aside for the rainy day funds when unexpected expenses occur due to health, hospital bills, etc.
Hi Paul I really like that your videos are longer than 9:59 lol very entertaining and not focusing on the doom n gloom I get enough here in Deluth 😂
Moral of the Story: Respect is earned not given. Great story daddy Paul!
Very good video Paul. I think we have all experienced that.
Love your stories Paul. Life is exactly the same in Thailand. Love the challenges.
I watch you man as you honest and I don't want to make those early mistakes you did - life is waaaayyy tooooo short!
Enjoyed the interview and the positive track
Great advice from a old dog who's been there and done that!!!
I’ve enjoyed you sharing of your life experiences.😊
Hi Paul enjoyed the video some good advise I know from your previous videos you dont like to give advise but indirectly you do any hopefully I can meet you one day and buy you a coffee or two keep the videos coming
And when you set boundaries and she does not honor them, you have to face the realization that she does not respect you and, if you stay with her, your problems have only just started. I am talking to myself out loud.
Same here. The problems only grow. Dealt with it for 20 years of growing problems. And though we had a wonderful son, I would have preferred to have him with a Filipina that I had a quality relationship with.
Agree, but you can have the same problem with a filipina. The problem is us when we don't set the boundaries early when the problem (s) first begins.
@@rocketranger1000 Sorry for not clarifying. She is Filipina.
Hey Paul, another great video. I am traveling in the Phils now. Mactan Newtown for another week then Bohol. Then I will make the seeming obligatory trip to Duma. Maybe I catch you at Ground Zero about Feb 1 or so
No greater words were spoken…set the boundaries.., thanks Paul