Відео

(6:45) oooh, great points and ideas about what our inner monologue is doing and telling us while we’re interacting with others! I’ve definitely had loads of Masking to try to fit in, and my inner monologue was trying to calculate out whatever would lead to social acceptance or approval

This is so spot on. Thank you!!! This makes me feel less lonely in how I experience the world and all my perceived shortcomings.

i don't even know for sure if I'm autistic, but I'm crying rn because - whether I am autistic or not - I do feel like I've been putting on a mask my whole life and just the thought of unmasking feels soo freeing :)❤

having autism is a big challenge

Your point about ignoring my needs really hit home. Recently it has been below freezing where I live, and I was walking around in too thin clothes for the weather. Instead of going inside/through a warm building I was gonna walk around it to get to the destination. But my friend said ”let’s take the route through the building”, and when I asked why he said cause he could see I was shaking from the cold. I did not even realize I was shaking from the cold! I only noticed I was cold and had decided to endure it anyway. It reframed my mindset to where I now do things to meet my needs more and feel better, like how a friend would

Explaining the way autistic people (especially people raised female) diminish their needs was mind blowing. Cause I’ve always just kinda been like “well I’m fine if I ignore my needs, I can cope. other people’s needs are more important” and that stems a lot from wanting people to like me, and wanting to be valuable and helpful to them, so they stick around. This was very eye opening, thank you❤

Ariana doesn't have REAL ocd. Real ocd is crippling. She's just a narcissistic homewrecker.

I used to - before I knew anything substantive about autism or neurodivergence - say that my superhero power was being a mimic. Learning about masking in my late 30's has been... A Ride.

I have always lost friends for misreading social cues even autistic people have criticised me for missing social cues and I feel like I can’t spell because I have been diagnosed with a speech delay (speech delay is also via text just so that your not confused) but yes i don’t want to have friends anymore because no one seems to understand me nor accept me because I’m autistic

Dumb AF. I've seen sooooo many pairs of actors and actresses doing this while being interviewed. It's nothing new.

I have bipolar and schizoeffective disorder, and am in my 30s. I’ve been described as “intelligent yet childish”. I used to mask a lot in my early 20s, but stopped doing so because it makes it easier for me to filter out who’d accept me for me and who would discriminate.

Humans mirroring each other is... not normal? Mirroring is literally how humans socialize. I took a life skills class in middle school, and the active listening segment encouraged mirroring the other person's body language to show you're paying attention and you care

lol ok

Thank you for this video. I want to say more, but I'll leave it at that.

It is so sad that so many of us are misunderstood and unjustly targeted for this. One point that has helped me is to acknowledge that there is NO such thing as normal - there is only average. And in my opinion - Who wants to be just average ? All of this bullying has got to stop. We aren't in school anymore and yet it seems that there are still quite a few playground bullies that have convinced themselves that they've grown up. (and we're the childish ones?)

You go girl! I had to deal with many things all my life. Only about 10 years ago I was FINALLY diagnosed with ASD (autistic spectrum disorder), ADHD, borderline personality disorder, CPTSD, anxiety disorder, major depression. (Which explained much of what I was dealing with!) These are all American diagnoses. So yeah, I got it all. It was a relief but also a “oh shit, now what do I do?” moment. But I’ve dealt with thins decently, DECENTLY. My biggest method was to body build, as silly as that sounds. I’m 5, 10, 200lbs. So I don’t get messed with at least in front of my face. I also usually just keep to myself and quiet. I’m also a lone wolf. I have only like 2 or 4 friends. That’s know I cope. It’s not the most noble or sociable but it works for me. Great video!

Uma Thurman and Ethan Hawke have said they are autistic?

I really enjoyed this video but Ethan Hawke and Uma Thurman have NEVER said they are autistic. Probably true of the others listed too. That list is just written some fan and that's untrue to include them.

Great video! Really great point as well.

Thank you so much for spreading this message of not judging people because they act differently from the societal norm, It's really difficult experiencing unjustified judgement from peers because of neurodivergence. I wish it didn't matter. ❤

Totally unrelated, but I can't imagine why I've got such a complex about my diagnosis and dealing with some serious internalised ableism, when the world is paying so much attention to this stuff and is so hyper-judgemental about it :))))

You're missing the boat on Liam if that's your take on his death.

As a neurodivergent person I'm tired of explaining myself.

I’m also a late diagnosed autistic female, I mask all the time and I always spill my tea 🙃😂

I live in the southeast US and we rarely get snow. When we do I am exactly like this, so excited because it's been years since a good snow and as soon as I'm outside it's freezing, wet, bright and I want to go inside 🙃

These comments you quotedshow how much people are out of touch with themselves, and project. Sad.

I won’t even start this conversation with my mother. I tried to talk to my younger brother and he simply interrupted me not letting me finish one sentence and devaluated everything like he knows better and I’m stupid. In the end I said, no, how am I possibly debilitated by autism if I can’t finish one sentence in my life’s most important conversation with my own brother. I’m obviously not autistic. He got angry with me 😂 f my life, man. This guy is the most understanding of my family… I didn’t expect that reaction.

Before i start the new wicked film is just another bad movie and will never top the original with the original cast, movies have gotten so dark lately like why does it have to be? we could actually use a lot of uplifting things these days but any era we definitely need uplifting things. Onto the subject of this video. Oh everybody does this we mirror each other some people more so than others it's just what happens when we're being effected by other people's energy around us especially people we've had contact with for a while or live with, we start taking things on from them it's something we do on automatic even habits of people. People even do it with celebrities they have parasocial relationships with especially if they're obsessed with them they start thinking aspects of the celebrities they admire are their own. It does get worse the more obsessive behaviors someone has though which is definitely the people you need to avoid if they do form constant highly obsessive attachments, but everyone else nah it's harmless and we stop it once we're no longer around them. It's just to do with the energy from other people so we have to be aware of that and be careful not to lose ourselves in it. The best thing to do is just remind yourself you're not them and just focus on what you're doing in front of you don't be so impressed upon by others.

Those comments annoyed me so much and it's partially why I'm so critical of the performative activism that seems to be rampant on social media. Neurotypicals will so often advocate for neurodivergents until our neurodivergence is no longer "cute" or "quirky."

The clip with Cynthia is overblown… I would expect two people who have spent the last few years intensely working on acting together to be accustomed to watching and reacting to each other. It’s probably unconscious at this point. It probably doesn’t help that the marketing of this movie seems to involve both of them being “in character” down to dressing like Elphaba and Galinda. I think in her case it may be a personality disorder compounded by her anxiety. She lacks a core sense of identity (she’s copied other friends in the past and built multiple distinct “personas”) and has dysfunctional love bombing/discarding relationships that look a lot like someone with poorly managed BPD. That would also explain why she reacts badly to the threat of rejection. I know BPD is thrown around constantly, but I think it’s almost inevitable that she’s been through a lot of trauma since her Nickelodeon days and BPD is a common response to early life trauma. I really hope she gets the help she needs, she doesn’t look physically healthy. Emotionally she has to be a wreck after getting divorced and getting herself tangled up in a huge cheating scandal. I bet her masking especially right now is a coping mechanism to keep the negative press from piercing too deep.

When your mom fail to diagnose you with autism cause your mom also autistic?

LITTERALLY MY ASSESSMENT PROCESS LOL

Great video! I’ve always thought of how celebrity gossip gives us a great place to talk about things like neurodivergence, social norms, how we react to these celebrities representing how we look at all people. But I always worried about unintentionally speculating on a celebrity and fueling the gossip. You’ve done a phenomenal job of using the conversation surrounding Ariana as your opener, but you ultimately talked about your experience and the real data surrounding the difficulties of masking and the harms we experience by ourselves and attempting to camouflage! So appreciate this video!! Subbed ! Take care! ✨

It's so hard having undiagnosed parents who tell you everything is normal because they do it too or because it's just that you were shy etc.

Her tendency to morph into the people she spends time with is likely due to having been surrounded by adult narcissists growing up. The safest thing for a child to be around unsafe adults is a shapeshifter. Is it manipulative? Yes! But it's not an intentional, or even a concious process. It's a survival mechanism left over from those formative years, that is now going unchecked on auto-pilot in the background in her adulthood.

Thanks for this video!! I’m so glad I don’t have TikTok with how brutally flippant and abrasive some of the thoughtless comments can be for any minority group... I didn’t recognize my own masking & ASD until a few years ago after watching Extraordinary Attorney Woo and Komi Can’t Communicate, two excellent shows on Netflix with a female neurodivergent protagonist. You just introduced me to RSD which is definitely a factor of my autism as well (my poor boyfriend can attest to that) 😅 I wish people just didn’t speak on what they don’t know more often.

To me it just looks like mirroring which I don't find that weird given how much time they've spent together the last couple of years. It could be masking I guess but it feels uncomfortable to me to speculate about someone's neurotype like that especially when there's other explanations

Lol You are not autistic. You were diagnosed by a quack willing to take your money to make you feel better. PTSD, OCD, depression, are mental disorders, not neurodivergence. Your ideas are cultish and totally absurd.

I don't really tend to mask or to even try to fit in. It seems so tiring and I don't want to change to be liked.. Edit: it's kinda lonely tho

It was always obvious to me that she tends to automatically mimicking the mannerisms of the person she is the closest with. When she was more focused in her music career she was with Victoria Monet a lot and everyone starts to complain that she used to sound like Victoria when she was speaking, now that she spent 2 years (or even more) working with Cynthia she adopted Cynthia’s mannerisms but, of course, the discourse online is that Ariana does that bcs she is mean and racist

I have several things to say. 1. I never felt so seen😂 2. I love your accent 3. I just dont bother seperating my clothes. I use detergent that can be used for everything and I am not attached enough to care wether my clothes change a bit in color 4. How does anyone expect you understand its an invite if they just talk about their plans infront of you????

I just realized I've been masking my whole life... I have adhd and struggle a lot with rejection sensitivity, but I thought masking didn't apply to me, but now that I heard you explaining it so thoroughly i realized I've tried to imitate certain mannerisms or ways of speaking of every friend I've ever had, just hoping that they'll like me better if I do. I struggle with feeling fake or worry that others may perceive me as fake for changing voice tone or even vocabulary depending on who I'm with, I've always hated being like this but it just came naturally to me, and now I can put a name to it... And it sucks that I'm now in my 20s wondering who am I, without any outside influence

Just that line- “why’d they say it? Cause clearly that wasn’t true” represents many conversations with neurotypical people 😅

I love living alone cos the second I’m home I can drop the mask and be my weird little self.

I'm Schizoaffective, which can look identical to autism on the surface (ASD was my differential diagnosis). I fear these perceptions so much.

My boss was stressed out the other day about decreased flow of tourists and said he could fkin close the whole cafe and retire. I started sending out CVs 4 minutes after he calmed down and everybody laughed about it. I know he said it because he was stressed but i also know he said it. And nothing can make me unhear it. I also know that everybody already forgot about it. Not me. I forget only good things and chargers

Im not sure about autistic but as a very literal thinker- laundry is done by weight. All light weight garmets like shirts and under clothes go in one pile, - jeans, pants, sweaters in another. If the heavy load gets too big then towels get their own load with a hoddy or two. The first time i wash something i often do it separately but once i find out something bleeds i just get rid of it.

this is actually so true. i'm speculating that i might have autism and this video has rlly highlighted some of the stereotypes and social stigmas that society has beaten into myself asw. thanks for this lol

I had a coworker think I hated her because I stated how her asking for more hours at work, but also constantly leaving early, didn't make sense to me 😅

Im not always a literal thinker. Things just confuse me.