Відео

I left my narcissistic abuser of 17 1/2 years approximately three years ago. He used and abused the court system. I have had no form of contact with my daughter for 23 consecutive months despite no state or child protection involvement. They are using my mental health condition to continue with this alienation, despite having my entire counseling agency behind me. I have been appearing pro se in my own custody battles for almost the whole three years. I am physically and legally disabled therefore, I receive disability as my only source of income and cannot afford legal representation. I have the support of multiple workers that confirm I am Steuble and more than fit to be able to parent, however it’s done no good. When a toxic person can no longer control you to control how other people view you and when that person is a narcissist? They will stop at nothing to drown you entirely. I even had the support of my counselor at the time, who had a PSYD and psychology advocating for my mental health stability to the Court system that was in affidavit, form and notarized. It’s done no good. A couple days ago my case manager created a GoFundMe page, as she is attempting to help me acquire the resources to hire representation because without an attorney my daughter and I have no hope of reunifying until she’s 18. She is currently 11. She was nine when I last saw or spoke to her. Please share my story. If you can, please donate to my GoFundMe share my GoFundMe or offer resources. Or if you know of an attorney in the state of Idaho, that will take my case. You can find my GoFundMe by searching the website under Amy Fluckiger, Pocatello Idaho. My story really does sound phantasmal and entirely made up. However, it is the never-ending nightmare, my daughter and I experience. I currently have the support of my entire counseling agency who can cooperate my experiences, including the owner. Please share. Please donate. Please help if you can. Thank you so much for taking the time out to read this.

My daughter is 17 this month and i still haven’t seen her but i think she is aware now ive been looking for her. Her mom tends to run change her number and address but finally i know where they live and i tried court but nothing. My question is this: i finall found one more way to send her mother a message and shes already 17z i literally want to lie and say our daughter reached out to me and you knew it would be a matter of time. I guess sort of like a manipulative tactic but for good reason. I want to even tell her she wont admit it to you . Yea it would create drama with them but i want my child to see how her mom really is

No it's not forever don't go back that's bull sht

Can you talk about how a parent that was absent by choice or a physical abuser/addict when the children were young, starts using money and "buying" the childrens rejection of you when they become teens and young adults? Is there a way to navigate this in a way to not do more damage to the relationship?

He has a PhD and has books I love his advice I think in UK therapists only have to have a Bachelor’s degree My sister works in Scotland with only a 4 years undergraduate degree So this DR has a masters PLUS A PHD!!! So I think that another 7 years plus then 1 or 2 years as a resident So HES THE EXPERT

Parental Alienation is a globalist agenda breaking up families ! How many more years is this child abuse going to go on ?? The judges can stop this IMMEDIATELY... take away sole custody !

I’m so happy I ran into this. My daughter will be 33 this month and she swears I was a horrible and negligent parent. I was a single mother (her father passed away) and I worked 3 jobs to pay bills and put a roof over our heads. She says I was never a mother. She says that I should have died, not her father(she was only 13 months old so she never knew him). She is in the Marines and is now an RN and blames me for not being in the grandkids life. She’s never let me! She’s been saying these things since she was 18. Just this past December I told her no more contact! I’ve had it. Now I’m done. Believe it or not I feel so much better than when I was taking her daily abuse. You listen to other people and they say to acknowledge their feelings??? What? I made sure we were never in poverty. Acknowledge that she wishes me dead? No! Now, she’s out of my life. I’ve never met my grandchildren because of her, so what am I missing? Thank you for this! I did indeed do the right thing! I’m blamed for everything that goes bad in her life, like 2 divorces, her kids getting in trouble at school, they live 1100 miles away!! But it’s all my fault. We as parents have to put limits on what these kids can say and do. Cut them completely out. It’s not worth your stress, time and life!

As someone who works with troubled families, I'm appalled. I'm appalled that this man can even consider himself to be any kind of counsellor or therapist: I Can tell you now, were he operating here in the UK, he would've beeb stripped of his license to operate long before now. His entire approach is one of objectification of estranged children: He actively encourages parents to lie to their children in roder to gain access to their lives, rather than engaging in the sincere introspection that's generally necessary in order to faciliate healing. What he encourages, his entire dynamic, is further abuse: Lying rather than introspection and change, self-justification rather than consideration. He operates from the automatic assumption that children are always in the wrong, that people estrabge from their parents arbitrarily or because of outside influences. . .anything rather than accept that he and those he relies upon for his grift might be in the wrong. He justifies bad parents in their bad behaviour. Coming from the perspective of someone who operates in these circles, he comes off as a total fraud, and I would advise anyone who is seeking genuine advice or counselling to steer WELL CLEAR.

As someone who works with troubled families, I'm appalled. I'm appalled that this man can even consider himself to be any kind of counsellor or therapist: I Can tell you now, were he operating here in the UK, he would've beeb stripped of his license to operate long before now. His entire approach is one of objectification of estranged children: He actively encourages parents to lie to their children in roder to gain access to their lives, rather than engaging in the sincere introspection that's generally necessary in order to faciliate healing. What he encourages, his entire dynamic, is further abuse: Lying rather than introspection and change, self-justification rather than consideration. He operates from the automatic assumption that children are always in the wrong, that people estrabge from their parents arbitrarily or because of outside influences. . .anything rather than accept that he and those he relies upon for his grift might be in the wrong. He justifies bad parents in their bad behaviour. Coming from the perspective of someone who operates in these circles, he comes off as a total fraud, and I would advise anyone who is seeking genuine advice or counselling to steer WELL CLEAR.

I disagree with you calling it “mistakes”. The parents behaviour is totally normal and natural!!! There is just a generation, technology, evolution gap or whatever that causes incompatibility. Separate realities: yep. So perhaps call it : 5 different realities….??!!!

Thank you for explaining what choice do we have. The letter worked, but I still have to let her go more then ever before because she is married woman. Miss her so much it has been 2 years I haven't seen her pretty face. Also 5 years she has been gone since she was 19 years old. She turn out tobe a strong woman and loves her job. ❤

Thank you for this goodness. I have ordered this book, my adult daughter has estranged herself along with her children and husband from me and her dad. She has said so many hurtful things that shocked me. I was told that I should know what my adult child needs in the way of helping her in the raising of her 7 children, I should know what she needs because I am a mom, wow. What I have come to learn is that my joy cannot be found in my children, that we have had joy filled moments in life, a lot of them, but my joy has to be centered for me in knowing how loved I am by God. This knowledge has helped me. This year for holidays I have determined that I need to do something else, I need to enjoy the day in a way that brings joy into my life rather than being sad in the missing of this adult child. I am okay, and it is okay to enjoy my life. Thank you again for this goodness.

No matter how correct you are about how or what parents need to do for reconciliation…., to me it seems impossible. Who wants to be/can be such a hypocrite??? It will make us sick to behave in this insane way!!!

You are soooo right!!! Yet to me, a 70 yo, it sounds totally insane. Do i wanna give out “guilt”? No protection!! Do I criticise?? No. Warn you for huge mistakes you are making but you r too dumb to realise. Etc etc. Parent need to turn in huge hypocrites n robots to please their kids…. This will make you mentally n physically sick. Run parents. Leave your kids/tormentors. They are not worth your love n care. Live yr own life. Be happy. 👏👏👍🏽

Anybody else have a basement full of Christmas, birthday, holiday gifts for their children still? I have 7yrs of Christmas presents for both sons- birthday presents, Easter and many in between. I think this was the last year I’m doing that now tho, as I no longer have any room. And as I look at all of the gifts…I just feel like a pathetic heel. 😢 Just wondering if anybody else does this too?

🕊️Matthew 22:37 Jesus said unto him, “'Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.🕊️Luke 12:51-53 Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division: for from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three.🤍🙏🕊️

This video you made really helped me. I have listened to it more than once. It made me feel good about myself. I knew I wasn't alone in this but made me realize how widespread this problem is. This talk gave me the tools I need, and I bought your book. Thank you

Adversarial vs collaborative approach - mirrored in the family dynamics ie the structure of the family court is a big part of the problem.

I'm based in Scotland and went through a custody case in 2011. It was a large cost to have what was called a house report. Similar to what you have initially discussed. Mine came back very positive from my point of view. In my case I had 4 judges at my local court. Not everyone of those judges read the house report, which was very disheartening. You have to ask yourself. If the judge isn't going to properly entertain such a report. Then why do it in the first place.

Jan 2025 15 years I can't anymore Boundaries And " my answer is No "

My husband passed away when I had 3 very young children. I had no family to help me. I worked over 40 hours a week, took them to the dental appointments, basketball weekend games, teacher conferences, school concerts, Disneyland etc. On top Of mowing my lawn, laundry, cooking, cleaning, car maintenance, etc. My 2 oldest basically hate me. I was in survival mode doing the best that I could. I didn’t even date to make sure they were safe. And now they are in their 20’s telling me how horrible I am. The pain is excruciating 😣.

My niece was abusive toward me swearing etc at my mother's funeral. I have little to do with her, and its not my fault her father left her nothing when he died or her mother has MS and is difficult. As far as I'm concerned the niece is not my relative. I wouldn't be related to someone who behaves like that.

The pain is too excruciating. Ive attempted suicide many times since. I want to die. But this video gave me some relief. A bit. Ty.

Thank you. I haven't made it through the entire video, but this feels honest and empowering. There's another guy on UA-cam who takes a more toxic approach to this sticky situation, and I felt beat down and hopeless just watching the video. But what you are saying signals to my soul that understanding and healing can happen.

Thank you Dr Coleman! You have shared incredible information to address this generational epidemic (of sorts) My husband and I agree with your thoughts and approach. You present the cause and healing process well without exclusion of one’s faith. Thank you

I see many cry parents here. I hope you weren't abusive guilty tripping suckers.

Cleanin out my closet.

Therapists never say talk about it to your parents. .

Times are changing. I took in my 25 yr old Grandaughter in and she is SO verbally abusive to me. I told her to leave . Every other word is FK. I'm 65 and need quiet. I feel for her, but tried to talk to her and she puts it back on me. No getting through to her at all . Horrible children

Let me know how I can help in this fight against parental alienation.

It's been almost 6 years I'm alienated from my son. I kept communication open and mothered my child (16-21 yrs old) through text and some calls. Saw him this Christmas with my x, and daughter who supports me. I learned he was lied to in the worst ways by his narcissistic father. He kept saying he wanted to kill me and how. He became very aggressive, came close to striking me, and threw my hot tea in my face. I suffered emotional numbness and calmly walked with my daughter. 😢 I feel I've now lost him forever. His life distroyed. He needs help. How?

As estrangement seems to be increasing! up to 28 percent of families are dealing with this issue😂 definitely a Trend

Spend the inheritance on yourself if there is any.

So true. Tried to share with my adult daughter how my feelings were affected and she simply could not respond to that at all! They act like they want you on a friend level, but the truth is, they really can't handle you on any level other than just parent.

I’m so thrilled I just found this! I’m going to take mine to court. I’m scared to death that I’ll be humiliated and I am afraid to ask a lawyer but I know I have a rock solid case based on perjury and violation of my constitutional and civil rights under color of law. I’m the mom and I was “banished “ not just from my daughter, home and business, for “disobeying a bogus restraining order based on lies. I had to stay home for 2 years. Ever hear of that?

I’m so thrilled I just found this! I’m going to take mine to court. I’m scared to death that I’ll be humiliated and I am afraid to ask a lawyer but I know I have a rock solid case based on perjury and violation of my constitutional and civil rights under color of law.

i am not over reacting when i tell you that you may have just saved my life ive been hanging on by a thread im gonna go have a good cry now then stick my face in some ice water

Mother of 3 children that were Alienated against me as teens now in their 30's and still no contact 18 years now. Father has Narcissistic behaviors and post separation abuse was horrible and cruel. I'm still hopeful one day I'll get a call.

What about when people are narcissists?

I had a social worker working for a CAS agency who admitted to being a drug addict mental illness and claims that she was so bad that therapy helped her and that's why she wanted to help families because of her broken life experience. So this is what this counselor believes that is so far from the reality. I grew up to witness Hundreds of close people I knew in low income areas and also in wealthy families destroyed by addiction, organized crime. She strongly believes that parents should lie to children and hide their addiction and corruption living from their children and this can make them a good parent 😢. LIES! LIES! LIES!!!!!😢CHILDREN discern, feel and Learn from behavior parents think children don't see or think children don't know. Most children have been damaged by this false way of thinking long term if they don't physically die young, become addicted, abusive, depressed or have some mental problems. Get back to TRUTH, simple truth people! You don't plant apple seeds and get bananas 😢. If We sow or plant negative living we think is hidden in the ground and think it will not be exposed and grow to affect the children. We're lying to ourselves 😢

hypocrites!!! 😢 children do what I say and don't do what I do😢

I don't agree with telling yourself how great you were and how much you sacrificed etc😢. I say pray for the heart to be longsuffering and patient WITHOUT OFFENSES against the child's feelings. Ask God what you can and could do to reach them to help mend their hurts. ❤ Parents many of you have fallen prey to the deception of growing up your children on social media, movies and allowed toxic music and more in the raring of the children that has corrupted the children and toxic behavior. Worse parents are not leading by GODLY examples that is the ONLY RIGHTEOUS GOOD example 😢. So kids mimic what they see and hear that influences their consciousness and subconscious beliefs and behaviors

reconcile to A Holy God and leave the rest to God ❣️❣️😇. Only God can put the broken back together as HIS PERFECT WILL is for humanity to love HIM with ALL OUR HEART AND SOUL MINDS AND STRENGTH AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER. GOD'S LOVE GAVE US FREE WILL TO CHOOSE TO LOVE HIM OR REJECT HIM. SO the best show of Godliness is giving each other the same grace of free willl to choose ❤. Worse thing is trying to force reconciliation through therapy. Therapy should be a free will choice to benefit. So many kids grow up bitter because they were forced to be around parents the courts and therapist thought was best for the children 😢. GIVE CHILDREN THEIR VOICE IS THE FIRST PART OF HEALING ❤

I'm a child that chose to be separated from negative people family, friends and acquaintances. Not because I think I am perfect. However I refuse to feast with miserable, gossiping, corrupted minds that are toxic. So I have learned in today's society with everyone having their own truth really divided society because everyone has different opinions and believe and desires that conflicts with others. Unless we return to the morals and GOD'S truth and standards for life as our guidance for a unified world ❤ . This world will continue to become divided. However I have found profound peace of accepting the Love of those i don't agree with to release them and let them go. Not necessarily because of any hatred or bitterness. However TRUTH OF agreement to agree we disagree. I live my life and you live your life. CHILDREN are a gift of God and they DON'T BELONG TO US!!! CHILDREN ARE LOAN to us by God who gives us the blessings of doing our best to raise them according to HIS RIGHTEOUS PRINCIPLES TO BETTER HUMANITY ❤. THIS IS HOW WE CAN BREAK THE CURSE and this downward spiraling of the relationship's

my😢God so many parents sounds like they're the victim and not the addition of the causes 😢💔. Generational curses is a reality Also all these psychological answers are broken imperfect men and women counciling based on their so-called professional opinions 😢. Without the REAL TRUTH AND WONDERFUL WORDS of life through JESUS CHRIST, who is the ONLY one who knows EVERY SOUL and what is the deliverance we need to be free from the pain's and heart ache from trama or estrangment. Everyone must take accountability and stop pointing your finger. True LOVE lives and let's lives

Well, you found your grift, enabling abusive, narcissistic parents to play victim now that their poor kids have finally had enough!

No apology? No relationship. No acknowledgement? No relationship. Your children are not indebted to you.

Thanks for this Susan. I almost didn't make it out the other side of Christmas this year, after 14 years of alienation. It sounds harsh, but it's a relief to see that I'm not alone in this pain. Happy new year from Ireland 🇨🇮

This video gives my spoilt child too much kindness. Parents suffer most when they gave too much to their child a mistake which others encourage our child to enjoy in their own mistake . If I knew this would happen ,she should be denied all those things which I gave her which is everything she needs. She should stay away forever. No need reconciliation ,it isn't fair,she took too much,she hurt me too much,she must go and never criss my path again. I never knew she was so unkind so now I know. I will never accept my adult child . She is not welcome to my house anymore and she does not need to try because she will never be allowed to walk into my home again. I felt so much better after I have accepted the fact that she is not deserving of having parents.