13.學而篇第十二章：禮之用和為貴

唐瑜凌老師陪你讀《論語講要》
13.學而篇 第十二章
【經文】
有子曰：禮之用，和為貴。先王之道，斯為美。小大由之，有所不行。知和而和，不以禮節之，亦不可行也。
本章的重點包括：
一、有子的學習成就
本章可以看出有子的胸懷，講話四平八穩，非常有格局。
二、以和為貴的禮
禮的用就是以和為貴，不會讓人感覺難以相處，與人格格不入。不同的場合有不同的依禮進退之道，用禮可以經營一個和諧的氣氛，受到別人的擁護，讓人願意講真心話。堯、舜、禹、湯、文武、周公，這些都是用禮經營天下的先王典範。
三、用禮不用和的問題
無論小事大事，用禮不用和，就會太過拘束，給人家感覺到忐忑不安，動輒得咎，不曉得如何是好。
四、用和不用禮也有問題
只知道和而不用禮來節制，會失去長幼尊卑的分寸，會混亂婚喪喜慶應有的氛圍，讓人感覺到錯愕，
五、懂得禮的意義與內涵，才能發揮禮的大用
和是禮的大用，經營人與人的關係，能夠有禮又有和，才是最美好的團隊。所以要能夠懂得各種禮節的意義與內涵，才能善用禮，使大家樂於其中。
學而篇第十二章白話解釋
【白話解釋】
有子說：禮，講究規矩，不能亂。但在用時，要講究和，以和為貴。先代聖人在位的為政之道，即是制定禮制，用禮時講究溫和。禮由先王所制立，歷代雖有增損，但以用和為最美。天下事皆用禮來節制而不用和，則於事有所不行。既然知道和為貴，然而專門用和，不用禮來節制，此亦不可行。
【章旨】
總說禮在用的時候以和為貴，用禮不用和及用和不用禮皆非禮也。
《論語講要》原文
「禮之用，和為貴。先王之道，斯為美。」禮，講規矩，不能亂。但在用時，應當以和為貴。先王，是先代的帝王。王，是指聖人在位者。先王為政之道，即是制禮用和。禮由先王所制立，歷代雖有增損，但以用和為最美。
皇邢二疏皆以和作音樂之樂講。今不從。依經文和是禮之用。劉氏正義說：「和是禮中所有，故行禮以和為貴。皇邢疏以和為樂。非也。」
「小大由之，有所不行。」皇邢二疏，由字皆作用字講。此意是說，無論小事大事，皆用禮，而不用和，則於事有所不行。
「知和而和，不以禮節之，亦不可行也。」既知和為貴，然而專門用和，不用禮來節制，此亦不可行。馬融注：「人知禮貴和，而每事從和，不以禮為節，亦不可行。」
皇疏引沈居士云：「上純用禮不行，今皆用和，亦不可行也。」
Teacher Tang Yuling will accompany you to read The Analects 13
13.Book 1 Xue er (On Learning), Chapter 12
The philosopher You said, “In practicing the rules of propriety, a natural ease is to be prized. In the ways prescribed by the ancient kings, this is the excellent quality, and in things small and great we follow them. Yet it is not to be observed in all cases. If one, knowing how such ease should be prized, manifests it, without regulating it by the rules of propriety, this likewise is not to be done.”
Highlights of this lecture include:
1. You-zi's learning and achievement
This chapter shows that You-zi (courtesy name of Youru有若) was a man of great strength of character with a good overall grasp of speech both in content and style that marked him out from average.
2. In practicing the rules of propriety, a natural ease is to be prized
People practice the rules of propriety “li禮” with ease bring harmonious interpersonal relationship to such a level that propriety rules can be applied to fit in different occasions accordingly; by which one can get along with others easily without incompatible feelings. In fact, appropriate ways to approach and retreat can apply to whatever occasions and context befitted. Harmonious atmosphere in a society helps mutual trust and respect to nurture. Paradigms of sincere communications nurtured between the state and the populace set up by ancient chiefs and leaders included Yao, Shun, Yu, Tang, and Wen, Wu and Duke of Zhou. They are said to be the “early kings” and good examples of governance of “he和; harmony,” by means of proprieties.
3. The drawbacks of using the propriety without harmony
In matters either of grave or trivial importance, the practice of proprietary rules without the accomplishment of “he和; harmony,” will make people feel uncomfortable, uneasy and restrictive in behavior, don’t know what is the right thing to do, and afraid to be faulted at every turn.
4. There are also problems of using harmony without propriety
Only knowing the importance of “he和; harmony,” but ignored the application of rules of propriety will result in no accepted standards of behavior to follow. The essential rules that assisted to preserve social relations and order will be distorted and confused. Losing the sense of mutuality based on ranking like elder and younger, noble and commoner, will ruin the existing harmony of rituals in weddings and funerals in particular. It’s just awkward.
5. Knowing the meaning and connotation of propriety can make the best use of it
The importance of “he和; harmony” depends on the best use of the rules of propriety “li禮”. It is the best working team if members can handle interpersonal relationship with both propriety and harmony properly. Therefore, only by knowing the meanings and connotations of proprieties and the accomplished “he” or harmony can ones make good use of, be at ease with, and enjoy the practices of proprieties.