Dated someone older than me by 5 years. She was 33, I was 28. She was my first relationship as an adult. It was the best relationship ever. Treated me so well. I treated her very well too. However, she has been through what I have not. Sometimes, I did not realised the road ahead requires planning. We eventually fell out 2 years later due to communication issues on both sides. After a year later, when I went through issues. I started to realised her thinking. Contacted her and told her my thoughts and regrets of not trying better in other ways. Kinda regretted not planning further ahead. Even though, I am ready now. she's 36, and I am 31. She might not have the trust in me, as she has no time to waste. This will be the biggest lesson and regret of my life. If there is a chance to rewind the clock, I will definitely do better.
Imo if both in a relationship are above 18 and consenting, then go ahead. It doesn't matter whether the man or woman is older by a lot. Of course, cheating on your partner and dating an older or younger person behind their back is a no-no.
I feel that many people have wrong assumption about maturity where they expect it is about doing "adult things" and having a serious air all the time. Contrary to that I feel that someone that is mature knows how to do the right things at the right time such as knowing when to have fun and when to be serious.
I'm 29 and i met a girl, looks like she was about 20 or 21. After talking to some friends i found out she is turning 17 this year. I almost go to jail. They all tell me to wait for her to grow up, but she'd already be somebody else's girl by that time.
Waiting does not mean letting her go n be bck after a year? It means just be careful n not do silly adult things. Hold up n zip ur pants tight. Anw if it's mend to be it shouldn't be a problem. In ang mo countries I realise they are quite open to start dating at around 16/17 n still manage to go past through the years n get married eventually? Anw there is a Chinese drama called "hidden love" with a story line of of a r/s with some age gap. She was a student when she first met him. It's hidden love cuz she thinks she is too young to confess. He even had debts n hold back in looking into a r/s. But it all ended well. Depending on each case, there is always possibility. It's a matter of choice n if u love enough to be willing to give up certain things to keep things going.
@@xuele94 yo chill dude. I was tryna be funny with that line "i almost go to jail". I think you didn't quite get it. Idk bout your drama, but in reality if you're in your late 20s and you date a 18, you're creepy. Like what they said in the podcast, if you're 30 and she's 18, you'll be called a creep. But if you're 42 and she is 30, that's fine. That's how society look at the age gap in a relationship. Moreover, the girl I was attracted to, is not yet 18, which made me sound even more creepy. It's so common to start dating in your highschool, both of you at 16 17 and then continue in PreU, uni, and so on. It's so normal. But when a young adult is attracted to a 17yo highschool girl, it's pedo. It doesn't even need to involve the sex part, just attracted to her alone already made you seem creepy.
@@wakemeuppp Go for what you want/ desire. If she's ok with it and so are you and both your intentions/ motivations are genuine I see no problem with it. The "creepy" label is largely driven by a feminist agenda to shame men who are attracted to significantly younger women. At 16 she has already reached the age of consent and can decide what she wants to do with her body. At 18, she is considered a grown adult and can vote. I will say though from experience that what a woman finds attractive/ desirable in her late teens/ early 20s may change significantly in her 30s and beyond in line with their agenda/ priorities. What is more important as a man is to figure out what you want/ desire in a long-term partner and if the person you're attracted to can fulfil those requirements and vice versa. I'm in my 50s and the youngest I've dated is 22. As long as you're not breaking the law you shouldn't care what everyone else thinks.
Germaine, I’m in my early forties. In my younger days, I used to think that listening to older songs which my parents listened to was so passé. As I got older, it dawned on me that Old Songs are NOT simply old songs. They are TIME MACHINES. Happy or Sad, It’ll bring you back momentarily to a time and place of your youth. Learn to enjoy them without judgement. 🙂 By the way, Celine Dion was an Outstanding singer with powerful vocals of love songs, perhaps rivalled only by Whitney Houston or Mariah Carey. 😛
Not in many Asian societies. As Germaine said earlier, if the girl is 18 and the guy is 30, people would go, "Creepy". Sure, she's 29 now and her bf is 41, no biggie. But if the guy was say, 50 instead of 41, you'd get a lot of "Excuse me?". As it is, Germaine has said that she knows of relatives who have quietly among themselves questioned the age gap between Germaine and her bf. So it really depends on the culture they live in, and the mindsets of the people.
I have a question to the younger ladies out there and on the show: When you say the older guys have their stuff figured out blah blah blah.....and specifically, financially stable, what do you mean by financially stable? As in they're earning a regular income that is generally expected of peers his age, or just that he's got a stable income and can pay for stuff himself, or that he's earning enough to pay for you such that you don't have to work anymore if you choose not to?
@@sleepy_dobe man here. Wha, never thought of what they really mean by financially stable. I think (I THINK ONLY LA) they mean he earns enough to pay for them if and when they want it, and enough to raise a family.
I think it depends on individual baseline on their own threshold. After the first lvl of basic criteria filter then look at what one can accept. I guess financially stable is probably good that there is no bad debt to begin with. Or at least have a mindset that plans for the future. Honesty on financial status would be a cute start to uds the person's baseline. I don't think the amt matters to me as quite an independent woman, I would say. Like the comparison with peers n all not really needed. Sometimes u need to look at the industry ur partner is in n be more practical with your expectations. It rlly depends on the person's character n personality too. If the women is self-sufficient herself. Sometimes one would prefer someone that provides time n service more than money. Of course if it's someone that have a criteria that I need to date someone that earns better than me etc that's a diff story n definition for the person. If the person's love language is gifts n she likes branded bags n don't earn much. Then she would probably prefer someone that earns enough to buy her bags whenever she wants. On a baseline would be living with your own money (not parents' money), still provides for family, well covered for insurance probably if its of a certain age, have a certain amt of savings for future. Spending habits, personality, well-being n mindset is more impt in general. At the end of the day couples are suppose to compliment each other. So it really depends. As long as there is a way to figure out a match point I don't see the importance in digging deep on the actual definition where it varies from person to person. 😅 When one loves u, they might change their perspective. What they thought is not considered financial stable in the past might not matter depending on situations.
how to tell the 'regular income' generally expected of peers at different ages? someone at the age of 40 can be a director, can be a manager, can be an engineer, also can be a teacher, waiter, so there is no general income to begin with. financially stable means no bad debt, have savings, do not need to worry about money (some ppl go broke before nx salary comes in, some ppl need to save for a yr to go for a holiday etc etc), no fights due to not having enough money for basic needs lah....... that's what i call financially stable. those what have few hundred k in the bank, can retire now etc etc that is beyond financially stable.........
Sadly yes . Unconditional love only your parents will give you. That’s why you should always put your parents first . Unfortunately we are living in an era that many woman wants you to be financially stable before even talking about love . Nowadays You hardly find woman that will tell you ‘ I love you even we don’t have money now let’s work hard and walk together all that stuff . Times had change They make sure the guy has everything before talking about marriage . Choosing comfort life over love . Very common now
Dated someone older than me by 5 years.
She was 33, I was 28. She was my first relationship as an adult.
It was the best relationship ever.
Treated me so well.
I treated her very well too.
However, she has been through what I have not.
Sometimes, I did not realised the road ahead requires planning.
We eventually fell out 2 years later due to communication issues on both sides.
After a year later, when I went through issues. I started to realised her thinking.
Contacted her and told her my thoughts and regrets of not trying better in other ways.
Kinda regretted not planning further ahead.
Even though, I am ready now. she's 36, and I am 31.
She might not have the trust in me, as she has no time to waste.
This will be the biggest lesson and regret of my life.
If there is a chance to rewind the clock, I will definitely do better.
Imo if both in a relationship are above 18 and consenting, then go ahead. It doesn't matter whether the man or woman is older by a lot.
Of course, cheating on your partner and dating an older or younger person behind their back is a no-no.
Germaine’s skin is glowing 😍
I feel that many people have wrong assumption about maturity where they expect it is about doing "adult things" and having a serious air all the time. Contrary to that I feel that someone that is mature knows how to do the right things at the right time such as knowing when to have fun and when to be serious.
I'm 29 and i met a girl, looks like she was about 20 or 21. After talking to some friends i found out she is turning 17 this year.
I almost go to jail.
They all tell me to wait for her to grow up, but she'd already be somebody else's girl by that time.
Waiting does not mean letting her go n be bck after a year? It means just be careful n not do silly adult things. Hold up n zip ur pants tight. Anw if it's mend to be it shouldn't be a problem. In ang mo countries I realise they are quite open to start dating at around 16/17 n still manage to go past through the years n get married eventually?
Anw there is a Chinese drama called "hidden love" with a story line of of a r/s with some age gap. She was a student when she first met him. It's hidden love cuz she thinks she is too young to confess. He even had debts n hold back in looking into a r/s. But it all ended well. Depending on each case, there is always possibility. It's a matter of choice n if u love enough to be willing to give up certain things to keep things going.
@@xuele94 yo chill dude. I was tryna be funny with that line "i almost go to jail".
I think you didn't quite get it.
Idk bout your drama, but in reality if you're in your late 20s and you date a 18, you're creepy. Like what they said in the podcast, if you're 30 and she's 18, you'll be called a creep. But if you're 42 and she is 30, that's fine. That's how society look at the age gap in a relationship. Moreover, the girl I was attracted to, is not yet 18, which made me sound even more creepy.
It's so common to start dating in your highschool, both of you at 16 17 and then continue in PreU, uni, and so on. It's so normal. But when a young adult is attracted to a 17yo highschool girl, it's pedo.
It doesn't even need to involve the sex part, just attracted to her alone already made you seem creepy.
@@wakemeuppp Go for what you want/ desire. If she's ok with it and so are you and both your intentions/ motivations are genuine I see no problem with it. The "creepy" label is largely driven by a feminist agenda to shame men who are attracted to significantly younger women. At 16 she has already reached the age of consent and can decide what she wants to do with her body. At 18, she is considered a grown adult and can vote. I will say though from experience that what a woman finds attractive/ desirable in her late teens/ early 20s may change significantly in her 30s and beyond in line with their agenda/ priorities. What is more important as a man is to figure out what you want/ desire in a long-term partner and if the person you're attracted to can fulfil those requirements and vice versa. I'm in my 50s and the youngest I've dated is 22. As long as you're not breaking the law you shouldn't care what everyone else thinks.
@@wakemeuppp im a dude and thats not cool ur lame
congrats charlene! been watching your youtube channel since y1 so surreal you’ve graduated alr!
i love hearing germaine speak >.
it's very soothing and eloquent!
Wohoo! I’m early :) thank y’all so much for talking about this topic! Y’all are so entertaining and helpful!
Age is just numbers. Is all in the mindset and character.
Jail is just a room
@@MadaraUchiha26150 so you are saying that Muhammad is a pedophile?
@@MadaraUchiha26150 so you saying that Muhammad is a pedo?
UA-cam deleting my comments. Communism
Can yall include ur wardrobe deets pls! Always looking fwd every ep. xx
Germaine, I’m in my early forties. In my younger days, I used to think that listening to older songs which my parents listened to was so passé.
As I got older, it dawned on me that Old Songs are NOT simply old songs. They are TIME MACHINES.
Happy or Sad, It’ll bring you back momentarily to a time and place of your youth. Learn to enjoy them without judgement. 🙂
By the way, Celine Dion was an Outstanding singer with powerful vocals of love songs, perhaps rivalled only by Whitney Houston or Mariah Carey. 😛
If the man is much older than the lady, no one will care...but if it's the other way round, the woman will be called a cougar
Not in many Asian societies. As Germaine said earlier, if the girl is 18 and the guy is 30, people would go, "Creepy". Sure, she's 29 now and her bf is 41, no biggie. But if the guy was say, 50 instead of 41, you'd get a lot of "Excuse me?". As it is, Germaine has said that she knows of relatives who have quietly among themselves questioned the age gap between Germaine and her bf. So it really depends on the culture they live in, and the mindsets of the people.
Love your shoes, Germaine!
16:44 YES YES YES a million times yes!!! i once dated this guy, 5 years older than me. he hasn't gone through stuff and it shows.
doesn't matter la, our first president also went for 16 year old girl and made her his wife when he was 39
i would say i prefer older woman, but it's hard to keep up with their lifestyle...earning power, spending and eating at nice places.
wait mark anthony is 1980's? wow azura... he did make a song in 1988 i think...
I have a question to the younger ladies out there and on the show: When you say the older guys have their stuff figured out blah blah blah.....and specifically, financially stable, what do you mean by financially stable? As in they're earning a regular income that is generally expected of peers his age, or just that he's got a stable income and can pay for stuff himself, or that he's earning enough to pay for you such that you don't have to work anymore if you choose not to?
@@sleepy_dobe man here.
Wha, never thought of what they really mean by financially stable.
I think (I THINK ONLY LA) they mean he earns enough to pay for them if and when they want it, and enough to raise a family.
I think it depends on individual baseline on their own threshold. After the first lvl of basic criteria filter then look at what one can accept. I guess financially stable is probably good that there is no bad debt to begin with. Or at least have a mindset that plans for the future. Honesty on financial status would be a cute start to uds the person's baseline. I don't think the amt matters to me as quite an independent woman, I would say. Like the comparison with peers n all not really needed. Sometimes u need to look at the industry ur partner is in n be more practical with your expectations.
It rlly depends on the person's character n personality too. If the women is self-sufficient herself. Sometimes one would prefer someone that provides time n service more than money. Of course if it's someone that have a criteria that I need to date someone that earns better than me etc that's a diff story n definition for the person. If the person's love language is gifts n she likes branded bags n don't earn much. Then she would probably prefer someone that earns enough to buy her bags whenever she wants.
On a baseline would be living with your own money (not parents' money), still provides for family, well covered for insurance probably if its of a certain age, have a certain amt of savings for future. Spending habits, personality, well-being n mindset is more impt in general.
At the end of the day couples are suppose to compliment each other. So it really depends. As long as there is a way to figure out a match point I don't see the importance in digging deep on the actual definition where it varies from person to person. 😅
When one loves u, they might change their perspective. What they thought is not considered financial stable in the past might not matter depending on situations.
how to tell the 'regular income' generally expected of peers at different ages? someone at the age of 40 can be a director, can be a manager, can be an engineer, also can be a teacher, waiter, so there is no general income to begin with. financially stable means no bad debt, have savings, do not need to worry about money (some ppl go broke before nx salary comes in, some ppl need to save for a yr to go for a holiday etc etc), no fights due to not having enough money for basic needs lah....... that's what i call financially stable. those what have few hundred k in the bank, can retire now etc etc that is beyond financially stable.........
Ya lor I also confuse . If we date someone who is financially stable why is it a benefit. Unless you expect them to give you money
Germaine no need to invest money la haha 😂
She's plenty comfortable, financially haha...
So it's impossible to happen in sg sometime in future or someone wants to guarantee it won't happen?😅
Hazel. So what happened with that 6 years gap relationship? Still going strong? 🙃
I saw Germaine hosting in bugis junction today😊 she looks great. Surprised that she is such a petite girl haha
what about younger guys dating older women?
6:11 9/10 moneyyyyy
Sadly yes . Unconditional love only your parents will give you. That’s why you should always put your parents first . Unfortunately we are living in an era that many woman wants you to be financially stable before even talking about love . Nowadays You hardly find woman that will tell you ‘ I love you even we don’t have money now let’s work hard and walk together all that stuff . Times had change They make sure the guy has everything before talking about marriage . Choosing comfort life over love . Very common now
ladies are racing for time if they want to have kids while men has no time issues really
Calvert
Germaine has daddy issues