Telling your child they're adopted | Talking about adoption | UK Adoption
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
- Hi all,
In this video I explain the strategies we use to talk about adoption with our children. I discuss the resources that we use and our general attitudes towards this subject. I hope this is helpful to consider when thinking about adoption and the language you might use when sharing things with your child.
Aimee!
Books for reference:
Renée Wolfs
Adoption conversations; What, when and how to tell (2008)
amzn.to/2ZFmbyJ
Margot Sunderland
Conversations that matter; Talking with children and teenagers in ways that help (2015)
amzn.to/2Rs0YFy
Margot Sunderland
What every parent needs to know; Love nurture and play with your child (2016) 2nd Edition
amzn.to/2Iwq1Vi
Jamie Lee Curtis
Tell me again about the night I was born
amzn.to/2RsiRUR
Keiko Kasza
A mother for Choco
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Sharlie Zinniger
Yes, I'm adopted!
amzn.to/2Iv9W1W
Morris & the bundle of worries
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The Teazles' Baby Bunny
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Elfa & the box of memories
amzn.to/2N1y1BL
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So interested to read this. I was told when I was 8 that I was adopted. There was no build up to it. It was also stressed that it was a great secret. I didn’t tell a soul for the next 14 years. I think the way things are done now is so much healthier.
Thanks so much for sharing Jane!
It's the most crucial thing for the whole process, to gain feedback from adoptees & for practices to support what works for those most affected by the process. I hope it only gets healthier
My boyfriend and I are hoping to adopt, it's still a long way off for us now but it's really comforting to me to be able to hear about the process and the realities even so far in advance so thank you
It's really lovely that you've opened up like that. We just go with the way the wind blows on each day.
Hi Aimee! Thanks for approaching such an important subject on another great video. I’d like to ask your opinion regarding the exposure of adopted kids on social media. I follow a lot of UA-cam channels of american families that have adopted national and internationally and they all seem quite happy and comfortable showing their kids on UA-cam and on Instagram for example, but I’ve noticed british families are the complete opposite, always hide their kids faces or never even mention their names. Why do you think there’s such a difference between the parents behaviour? Is it just a matter of safety and privacy or fear the birth family might recognise the children or perhaps being adopted is something that people still prefer to keep to themselves? Like you said, adoption should be celebrated and not hidden. I wonder if these children were biological, if the parents would be quite happy to expose them but because they are adopted, their faces and names will always have to be kept secret. Thanks again xx
Fe Massafera, this is definitely a common occurrence. I would only be guessing but...
As the US is so much bigger than the UK I would assume that children are generally adopted from hundreds if not thousands of miles away and so that sense of security allows them to feel more comfortable than us on our ‘tiny’ island maybe.
For me personally, because I work in early years also; I wasn’t 100% happy with our children (regardless of adoption) being visible on social media at such a young age and when they have no say in the matter. Absolutely no judgement for people who choose otherwise (its great to get updates from others and see their little ones as they grow).
I am still torn about this as there are many justifiable arguments for and against. It might be that as the children get older, look different and can express their wishes in more detail, the decision changes.
Also, the process in the US is so different to adopt and from what I’ve seen I think there is much stronger legalities in place and so perhaps this also makes people feel more secure. I have never looked in to the specifics but I also believe there is a higher number of relinquished babies in the US and so those parents may have chosen (for very complex reasons) to place their baby.
Like I say, I’m mainly guessing based on snippets from UA-cam and podcasts.
But it is definitely something people think about a lot I think. Thanks for asking the question! 😊
Please Do A Video On Books As I’m In The Hunt For Books Please ❤️x
dont talk so fast I didn't get anything as you are going to crazy talking and is a waste . are you talking or trying to sing
🤣 thanks for the feedback. Luckily you're the only one struggling