How Self Care Makes Healing From Narcissistic Abuse Faster And More Effective

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  • Опубліковано 28 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 89

  • @NarcSurvivor
    @NarcSurvivor 3 роки тому +67

    You have been taught to neglect yourself. You have been taught that you do not deserve to be looked after, whether it’s by yourself or someone else. Practicing self care reprograms your belief system, it says that you do deserve to be cared for, you are worthy, you are enough.

    • @whatsgoingon6256
      @whatsgoingon6256 3 роки тому

      I love you Narc Survivor! Hehe its very cool to see YOU of all people here LOL 😆 right on! 🥰

  • @fleep9008
    @fleep9008 3 роки тому +15

    Being your OWN WORST CRITIC is what narcissist depend on. Don't give it to them and most importantly, best you not criticize YOUR (SELF).

  • @johnbehneman1546
    @johnbehneman1546 3 роки тому +30

    Great video Melanie, I believe in self-care 100% in life. And even more after Narc abuse. Normally I go to the gym and bookstore for continued healing. Now I just engage myself in hobbies and home improvemt projects. Do what brings JOY BACK INTO YOUR LIFE.

  • @catherinepatterson4720
    @catherinepatterson4720 Рік тому +4

    This was excellent. I like the ratio information you gave us (i.e., 90% focus on self care and 10% on learning about narcissism). I’ve been focusing on it the other way around and I must say it’s been getting me down lately. I could easily go in the Guinness world book of records for the number of videos I’ve watched, books I’ve read, including listening to audiobooks on narcissism over the last three years. Joke aside, I’m going to start watching more self-care videos on UA-cam. This is my goal for 2023: self care! Thank you for an uplifting and encouraging video 🦋

  • @paulzedx636ninja7
    @paulzedx636ninja7 3 роки тому +25

    I've had narcissist be strongly opposed to me working out. I didn't realize they we're priming me for abuse. Once I started working out again, it was like a deflective shield. 😁

    • @Plumduff3303
      @Plumduff3303 3 роки тому +4

      I saw my ex girlfriend with her new guy she looked completely through me...same woman who for 8 years who took everything left me bancrupt...I feel sorry for the new guy but I do feel lonely

    • @brandi5154
      @brandi5154 3 роки тому +4

      My ex used to throw it in my face like I was being selfish. 🤔 and the more in shape I got the more he was uninterested.

    • @paulzedx636ninja7
      @paulzedx636ninja7 3 роки тому +3

      @@brandi5154 In their twisted mind it's being selfish for being more difficult to control. Working out and being healthy, brings about confidence and they definitely don't like that. 🙂

    • @Scorpiorisingtwo
      @Scorpiorisingtwo 2 роки тому +1

      Mine didn't want me to get too attractive later on in the relationship unless it was for him. He didn't like me wearing makeup out.

    • @paulzedx636ninja7
      @paulzedx636ninja7 2 роки тому

      @@Scorpiorisingtwo It's like they want you for display purposes only. Then they want to try to keep you on a shelf the rest of the time. 😙

  • @LT-bf7nc
    @LT-bf7nc 3 роки тому +5

    Thanks for the video. I was on a fast track to losing weight. I have been with my Narc for 20 years. All years over weight. I felt like I was dying so I decided to lose weight for me. I did great 25 pounds. I have gained 7 back in a month. The stress of us trying to sell the house and split. He doesn’t want to help with anything . He also has been crying and whining about the break up. I still live with this man and hopefully soon I can get the house on the market and sell. I know why I have gained the weight back. I need to heal my emotions. Stop letting this man affect my inner being. He has the bullets. But I think you just gave me the bomb. I now know starting today, those toxic waste lines he give me will not affect me anymore. I won’t let it. I often get confused on how people say you don’t let people control your feelings, but I think how could I not when he is so verbally abusive?? I know the answer but I sometimes revert back. I am wanting to stand strong against the storm.

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +1

      Sweetheart you can regain your own power and get out the storm that you are in right now by joining me in my next free healing webinar were I will teach you the methods that gave myself and countless others our lives back.
      melanietoniaevans.com/freewebinar Love and blessings xoxox

  • @Mary-louise
    @Mary-louise 3 роки тому +14

    Thank you Melanie your NARP program saved my life it not only healed me but it changed me I always practice self care every day in every way stuck in lockdown but with all my loving family around me I am ok and doing a 30 day yoga challenge with my beautiful brother in Canada through video link ❤️❤️❤️

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +3

      Aww Mary it is my pleasure. Keep Thriving Sweetheart. Love and blessings. xoxox

    • @saadhna7260
      @saadhna7260 3 роки тому +1

      Yaaaaaaaaay!! 🙌😌

  • @mariahhubbard5946
    @mariahhubbard5946 3 роки тому +9

    Starting to take the responsibility to take care of myself and putting my health first! Thank you soooo much for all you do! Love the video♥️♥️♥️♥️

  • @fleep9008
    @fleep9008 3 роки тому +7

    When it comes to food, like she said, less chemicals the better. Think of this as well, Bless your food, or Atleast say to your food, I Love You and Thank You. Kinda goes back when people prayed for the blessings of having foid on the table.

  • @saadhna7260
    @saadhna7260 3 роки тому +11

    Thank you, Mel. 🙏
    This is PRECIOUS!!
    I am so glad that I'm learning this now. I feel like a child, learning precious things and finally getting the nourishment that I always needed.
    Thank you for being what you are.

  • @terridavis9278
    @terridavis9278 3 роки тому +3

    I was raised where self care was selfish. I am so glad I was told about this video. Thank you. I needed this.

  • @tiffanycherry6483
    @tiffanycherry6483 3 роки тому +5

    Great Video!!!! Thanks for sharing!!!

  • @fleep9008
    @fleep9008 3 роки тому +5

    If you do not like BULLIES or do not like being BULLIED. Then you are on a healing path.

  • @jaleh0811
    @jaleh0811 3 роки тому +4

    One of the best videos I have seen to help really remedy what I'm experiencing. There is a lot of research on understanding the narc but more importantly is content to help heal your own trauma to put yourself together again. Thank you so much.

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому

      I am so happy to hear this was of support you sweetheart. Love and blessings xoxox

  • @leslie.dixon.
    @leslie.dixon. 3 роки тому +2

    I’d love to see a video about how to get started retraining people how to treat you once you’ve begun caring for yourself. That part is where I start giving up.

  • @suzanoz4506
    @suzanoz4506 2 роки тому +1

    Yesss. Epsom salts 🧂 is great. I never thought about putting the nightmares in the shifts. Yes psychic attacks. It's horrible!

  • @peterknyk1942
    @peterknyk1942 3 роки тому +9

    Thank you Melanie! First, thank you for NARP! It’s so interesting.... for a long time I watched my exnarc “practice” many of the Holistic modalities that you mentioned in this video. Well, after all of that New Age living she cheated anyway and became abusive and ran off and cruelty discarded me. After listening to what you said today a lightbulb went on in my head! 💡 She was not doing the “inner”work! She was only doing “outer”work.....I understood from what you were saying that when the two are not combined and balanced the end result is an unbalanced and lopsided individual which she became.
    I don’t want to be like her or like that because I find it really revolting! Being in NARP is helping me move forward from narcissistic abuse. finding that special life within has become so important now in my life and NARP is my guiding light....Thank you so very much Melanie! ❤️🦋❤️

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +1

      Peter you are very welcome! There is such a huge difference between cognitive information and truly deeply embodying it. I love that NARP has been there for you so much xoxoxo

    • @peterknyk1942
      @peterknyk1942 3 роки тому

      @@MelanieToniaEvans Thank so much you Melanie! We are so looking forward to February 17th! ❤️🦋❤️

  • @getrudemwaura946
    @getrudemwaura946 3 роки тому +5

    Thanks Melanie 🙏🙏🙏.
    A Very inspiring Video.🌹🌹.
    All thy Blessings 🙏🙏💞💕💕

  • @SherlyPM81
    @SherlyPM81 3 роки тому +4

    I wanna say thank you very much. This is 💯% resonate. 😭 Tears of joy.

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому

      Aww you are so welcome sweetheart. Love and blessings xoxox

  • @sherritetz596
    @sherritetz596 3 роки тому +2

    Finally, a practical, specific and systematic solution!! I have been begging for this. We hear the sayings “move on”, “focus on yourself”, “just let it go”, “stop thinking about him”. How??? Now I can make a concrete plan. Thank you!!!

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому

      You are so welcome sweetheart. Love and blessings xoxox

  • @OneFaithFilledLady
    @OneFaithFilledLady 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you for this video. I'm trying to get back into self care but it's so difficult. I be so depressed. I'm still with my narc trying to make a plan to get out and gain strength to stay out.

  • @angelac3788
    @angelac3788 3 роки тому +3

    Yes, Mel! I am a huge Harry Potter fan, and I realized years ago that the narc I was involved with acting as a dementor. Dementors are definitely narcs!

  • @exoticbloomingflowergirl
    @exoticbloomingflowergirl 3 роки тому +1

    Melanie! I don't have the words to describe how powerful, healing and helpful you are. Thank you for understanding and validating what I've been through and showing me the way to recover. THANK YOU!! 🌺

  • @phoenixrising7069
    @phoenixrising7069 3 роки тому +5

    Yessss...this is all the stuff I've been doing. I had a black tourmaline, but my 4 year old was playing with it and lost it and is not telling where she had it! 😳😂 That's okay...my lil sunshine soul needs protection too 🦋

  • @bubbles.stu26
    @bubbles.stu26 5 місяців тому

    Yup, I recognized the toxic in another group and I needed it for a moment to re-work some stuff. I was led their for a reason and gratefully I had a sense of what was toxic through the whole journey and left at the right time.

  • @rosalynannebeauty6944
    @rosalynannebeauty6944 3 роки тому +3

    Needed this today 🙏 My coping crutches are sugar and shopping. I've been slipping up a bit. Meeting myself with compassion about that, yet loving myself enough to re-inforce that discipline.

  • @KTLees
    @KTLees 3 роки тому +1

    Yes...The body bends-the shadow follows!

  • @suzanoz4506
    @suzanoz4506 2 роки тому

    I do. I think all the time. So analytical. I drive myself crazzy!
    I will do module 1 again tonight. My body ankles are full of fluid for months. { Bursitis}
    Emotional suppression on a metaphysical level.
    I get very fearful that I'm not going to get out of it!
    Thanks Mel. ⭐️

  • @Hammondchris
    @Hammondchris 2 місяці тому

    The big sister I always wanted😮!! Love❤feeling validated thank you SO much

  • @Allthingseden
    @Allthingseden 2 роки тому

    Wow! ♥️🙏 I'm so grateful to have come across you and your work, and I'm only on my second video. I'm going to look for your NARP course now. Thanks so much! 🙏
    Lots of love.♥️💕

  • @martharivera8139
    @martharivera8139 3 роки тому +1

    Totally like the DEMENTORS!! Its so great, i did get myself a black tourmaline necklace. Today is a day i cant stop thanking you sooooo much.

  • @krmnsee5804
    @krmnsee5804 3 роки тому +2

    I participated in your workshop this past weekend and I felt really good afterwards. Taking responsibility for trying to “fix” my ex and starting to heal my inner wounds. I’m on day two of no smoking and started working out again. I’m grateful for finding your IG and UA-cam channel because you provide so much information that helps us learn how to heal ourselves. I’ve tried so many things to heal but I was just surviving and limping along. You share from POV of someone who went through narc abuse and beat the odds and I believe I will too. I’m a slow starter but never give up. Thank you!

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому

      I am so happy to hear that you were able to join my workshop hun. It is my highest honour to walk along side you and share the revolutionary methods that saved my life and countless others. Love and blessings to you. xoxox

    • @krmnsee5804
      @krmnsee5804 3 роки тому

      @Melanie Tonia Evans Thank you. The honor is mine. Love and blessings to you as well.

  • @mrdunnepoetryreallifetvuk1934
    @mrdunnepoetryreallifetvuk1934 3 роки тому +2

    My alcoholic mother attempted to drown me as a baby, my dad & stepmother abused me, disowned my mixed race daughter at birth, had me jailed & my material banned for five years courtesy of Crown court. All of my belongings were then stolen by my family of toxic Narcs & my daughter’s silence bought in exchange for disowning her dad. My Jehovah’s Witness aunt was also found to be abusing her young son & is still a Witness to this very day whereas I’ve been shunned & have had absolutely every single belonging stripped or stolen from me including my whole entire music collection. All except my dog, my one & only true friend. This world is a wicked place! 😥

  • @grahamlangley4856
    @grahamlangley4856 2 роки тому

    That's what took me so long to get help. I was a 50/50. My foot was on the accelerater and the brake at the same time. No more now 😊

  • @thevorpalone1045
    @thevorpalone1045 3 роки тому +6

    Very good video, loads of good info.
    Funny analogy made me
    Lol, "It's like putting
    Ice cream on top of poop."

  • @simsimi12345
    @simsimi12345 3 роки тому +4

    Best advice ever thank you 😊 ❤

  • @fatima5959
    @fatima5959 2 роки тому

    I was watching since 6 years you are the best Melanie you rock my god bless you

  • @philcooper9225
    @philcooper9225 3 роки тому +17

    My narc legit kept bringing oreos and cakes around even though they knew I was on a strict diet. If I threw them out they became irate. Only when I began to laugh did they know I was undefeatable
    They're gone and I am 40 lbs down!

    • @loulou9978
      @loulou9978 3 роки тому +1

      Yes my ex narc used to do the same every time I was on a diet then I completely changed my eating eliminating all that junk and he wouldn’t let up. I started just ignoring the stuff until it went bad. They are despicable people

  • @BenThompson
    @BenThompson 3 роки тому +2

    whyd i tell the narcissist my biggest fear was being taken advantage of literally direct access to the wound, healing starts tonight

  • @Angell_Lee
    @Angell_Lee 3 роки тому +1

    You are an angel, thank you

  • @tribalequestrian4954
    @tribalequestrian4954 2 роки тому +2

    I thought my spouse was a covert narcissist. He is actually an aspbergers. Please, look it up before you throw in the towel. It made us have empathy for him and realize he didn't mean to come across that way. He really does love us.

  • @Zer0kx
    @Zer0kx 3 роки тому

    What is helping me heal, is seeing how I am now free to build and live myself without living in constant fear of rejection because I like something that isn't approved.
    This development also broke a few other unhealthy relationships that were holding me back, but I didn't even feel the pain anymore, I was just fed up with being told not only what to do, but also what to THINK.
    I could start to let go of fixing my ex as soon as I realized that this personal development that I am undergoing makes me a better person that is less dependent on approval of others than before.
    Since I could see it as something positive, I stopped fearing for the "next victim" of my ex, and could see it as a journey that they also can use to come out of their shell.
    We are granted the ability to learn from our mistakes and grow, they are not able to learn from their mistakes because they make none in their opinion.
    Hope you all will get over it, I know it's soul crushing, but there is a BRIGHT light at the end of the tunnel and its an upward spiral from there.
    Thank you for your videos and work in general, without it I would probably have taken a lot longer to realize some things. Sometimes I have to watch something 3-4 times before it sinks in and my heart realizes what my brain already knew, but that is okay.

  • @rosemiangulo9233
    @rosemiangulo9233 3 роки тому +4

    Thanks so much!

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +1

      You are so welcome Sweetheart. Love and blessings. xoxox

  • @fleep9008
    @fleep9008 3 роки тому +3

    Also, research Ross Rosenberg. May have misspelled last name. Codependent or as he has relabeled SLD. Self Love Deficient.

  • @claudiadebij6874
    @claudiadebij6874 3 роки тому +3

    Great video Mel. Is the silver narp course just as effective as the gold one? Love from Claudia in Holland.

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому

      Hi Claudia, thank you for your question hun, with the Silver membership you receive exactly the same modules to work with to release the traumas, the Gold NARP package grants you access to the NARP forum community and some bonus material, truly hun, I can't recommend GOLD enough to connect with other beautiful Thrivers to share the journey and be supported. Many people do choose to upgrade from Silver. Please reach out to my lovely team via email support@melanietoniaevans.com if you have further questions. Love and Blessings xoxox

    • @claudiadebij6874
      @claudiadebij6874 3 роки тому

      @@MelanieToniaEvans Thank you so much! I have been on the healing path now for 2.5 years since I went no contact with my narcissistic mother and sister. I have been doing lots of inner work with a actual coach. I made a lot of progress, but my intuition says it is time to dive in a bit deeper with the narp programme. Xx

  • @fea5rrlessfea5rrless42
    @fea5rrlessfea5rrless42 3 роки тому +2

    Thanks

  • @CammieHupp-f9s
    @CammieHupp-f9s 5 місяців тому

    Thank you

  • @HomeFrendsten
    @HomeFrendsten 2 роки тому

    To avoid neg thoughts of mothr and traumas i try to go out and meet some positive and kind peopl

  • @marialaurare
    @marialaurare 3 роки тому +3

    CBD

  • @whatsgoingon6256
    @whatsgoingon6256 3 роки тому +2

    Hahaha "Overanalysis Anonymous" 🤣😅😂

  • @marieestelle709
    @marieestelle709 Рік тому

    I loveeeee self care Soo much 💋🦋💯🦋👏🦋🥳🥰😌✨🎉🙏🙂😊🙂🙂👏😅

  • @anjaliv2117
    @anjaliv2117 Рік тому

    They make you guilty for taking care of ourselves....and call selfish 😶

  • @kimtaylor1534
    @kimtaylor1534 3 роки тому +1

    ♥️

  • @005HegeFredriksen
    @005HegeFredriksen 3 роки тому +1

    Marvellous! Thank you, and take care.
    Important info on "Covid-19": interview with David Icke, by Brian Rose, LondonReal, on You -Tube or David Icke`s homepage.

  • @freesprit4184
    @freesprit4184 3 роки тому +3

    What is NARP please? 🙏

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +2

      Hi Free Spirit, thank you for asking about my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program hun. You can learn all about NARP here www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp
      Please know you so welcome to join me in my free healing webinar melanietoniaevans.com/freewebinar too to understand more and experience my healing system Quanta Freedom Healing that is integrated into the NARP modules. Love and Blessings xoxox

    • @freesprit4184
      @freesprit4184 3 роки тому +1

      Thanks so much 🙏💕

  • @HomeFrendsten
    @HomeFrendsten 2 роки тому

    Narctc mothrs do not care chld rn even during infancy, they create lot if traumas duevto their competant and envious nature

  • @claireharley4926
    @claireharley4926 3 роки тому +1

    😊💖💙💜💪💪

  • @Veronica.John10-10
    @Veronica.John10-10 3 роки тому +1

    Once again you have the "WHAT" but not the "WHO". You've stepped into New Age white witchcraft. Manipulating your healing without the help and glorifying the Holy Spirit of Jesus is the definition of witchcraft (aura readings and crystals etc.) What you say is so beautiful and so true, but you're missing the One Person Who can do all this for you in INSTANT without you having to understand it all. I don't need to understand how something works if I can take it straight to the Creator who can fix it straight away and without the dangerous side effects.

    • @MelanieToniaEvans
      @MelanieToniaEvans  3 роки тому +6

      Veronica if you actually knew anything about my healing process, you would know it is about a direct connection with Creator. Please take your judgemental opinion somewhere else. Its incredible presumptuous, non factual, divisionist and not welcome.