I’m 21, I have a 2 1/2 year old son and I’m 31 weeks pregnant with a second baby boy I genuinely can not imagine the unbearable pain you must have felt and still feel no matter what age he was I can only some what understand because both of my best friends passed away a year apart both at 18 and that was devastating I can’t imagine what both of their family’s still feel. I hope you are doing ok but it’s ok to not feel ok aswell life is truly unfair
I totally understand... I lost my son as well and it truly changes everything, even the person you used to be. From one grieving momma to another, I know your pain 💔❤️
No, life will never be the same. But you can survive. You must. If nothing else, for the kids. You promised Jenny. You are really growing as a parent. Just remember life is not a straight line. Neither is grief. You got this🎉❤
I lost my husband late 2023 and it has been hard to watch you go through your grief, too. But I read something that says we don't just lose them once. It's over and over, with each memory, each holiday, each anything! Validation of the grief is so important because the loss of a spouse is so much more intense. I've lost a twin, parents, siblings, cousins, friends. Loss of my spouse has been the biggest gut-punch. You are seen and heard!
I am 66. I am not the person i was at 26.... not because i am older, but because of all that has happened in those years. The people in my life who have died, the people in my life who have grown up into adults, the people in my life who have moved on from me or who i have moved on from..... it all changes who you are as a person. But i would say the memories are precious and will stay with me forever giving me comfort and joy.
Youll never be the same, ever kyle. My mother died on jan. 12th, at 6:20am. 15 yrs ago. She LOVED CHRISTMAS. WE BAKED COOKIES TOGETHER MY ENTIRE LIFE. I HAVENT BAKED IN 15 YRS, I ORDER THEM. WE DECORATED TOGETHER AT HER HOME AND MINE. I HAVENT DECORATED OR EVEN HAD A TREE IN 15 YEARS. A FEW WEEKS AGO I HAD A DREAM, WELL I BELIEVE IT WAS AN ACTUAL VISION. MY MOTHER APPEARED TO ME WITH OUTSTRETCHED ARMS, KISSED BOTH MY CHEEKS, AND CLEARLY TOLD ME IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO MOVE ON WITH AS MANY YEARS AS I HAVE LEFT ON THIS EARTH. IM 67, AND IVE PRAYED FOR 15 YEARS THAT GOD WOULD TAKE ME HOME. MY MOTHER TOLD ME ITS NOT MY TIME, THAT WE WILL B TOGETHER IN GODS TIMING AGAIN. SHE TOLD ME ITS TIME TO STOP GRIEVING. SHE TOLD ME TO STOP CRYING,. SHE TOLD ME TO CELEBRATE XMAS THIS YEAR. AND THANK GOD FOR MY SONS, OTHER MEMBERS OF OUR FAMILY, AND THE GOOD FRIENDS GOD HAS PLACED INTO MY LIFE. SHE LOOKED LIKE SHE WAS AROUND 30 YRS OLD, AND SO HAPPY AND SO HEALTHY. WELL....I TOOK THAT VISION SERIOUSLY. MY ENTIRE HOME IS DECORATED, I NOT ONLY HAVE ONE TREE, I HAVE TWO TREES! AND I HAVE SOME XMAS SPIRIT IN MY SOUL FOR ONCE IN 15 YRS. THE LAST THING SHE SAID TO ME WAS.....WHY WOULD YOU BE SO SAD ON HOLIDAYS, WHEN YOU KNOW I AM HEALTHY AND BLISSFUL? IM FINALLY FREE OF MY SICKKY EARTHLY BODY!! AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU MY DEAR SWEET DAUGHTER, IF I HAD A CHOICE TO COME BACK TO YOU, OR STAY HERE. I WOULD REMAIN HERE. WHEN ITS YOUR TIME,,,YOU WILL SURELY UNDERSTAND. AND SHE FADED AWAY. SO, HAPPY HOLIDAYS, MERRY CHRISTMAS, AND A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN.
Yes, thank you for sharing. That’s beautiful. I always fear the same. My mom absolutely loves Christmas. She puts up her beautiful Christmas village at home, that’s on 4 six foot tables, full of faux snow, villages, towns, roads, scenery, people, shops, animals. It’s truly amazing. She’s 70, I’m 49. However, she is healthier than me so you never know. I do think it’s just wonderful that you had this vision and decided to enjoy Christmas. What your mom told you is absolutely right. ❤
your comment moved me to tears. my mom had also dreamt of her mom before, letting her know that she was okay and that she would be okay too. 🫶🏼 i hope you never a wonderful Christmas!
That was your mom. I’m the same. I can’t. I need signs. Have you watched Next Level Soul on UA-cam? We don’t die. These signs are real. At least that’s what I’m holding on to.
Dear Kyle, you won’t be the same you will be forged in steel by the suffering you have been through. You will be a stronger finer more compassionate person with a great capacity for love. You are very much loved ❤❤❤
None of us can remain the same year after year. Your circumstances have changed. Even if you meet a new woman it won’t be the same. BUT you can find happiness again. You’re still in the grief process. Don’t fear the change. Love the memories, love each other. You will get thru this. ❤️
Thanks, I'm going through grief, loss of husband of 65 years. It is hard, at 85 years of age myself. Loss of close friends, siblings, not anything close friends. I'm living in a Christian community with Jesus as our common friend. I try to stay positive. Your doing great with your children as they have loss as well.
I was numb for three years. (Unexpected death) I didn’t reach out, I didn’t phone, text… nothing. I went to work and pretended to be ok and that took everything I had. I existed. Not a shred more. Be patient. That was nearly 20 years ago and I’ve lived a fairly happy life for the last ten. The thing is we die too. At least the person that we used to be, and we are left to build a new self out of what is left. We are NOT the same.
I can relate to this 100%, as my dad (and best friend for life) died in an accident last year. And I found him, clinging to life. I watched him die a painful death and there was nothing I could do. It wrecked me, and I didn’t ask for help either. People thought I seemed too “normal” for what had occurred, but little did they know I was grasping at life just like my dad did that day. I’m still not okay, almost 2 years later. Not okay at all. It’s not FAIR that he’s gone. I MISS his genuine personality, never ending love, constant camaraderie & laughter. I miss his reasonable but positive advice in tough situations. I miss his voice, I miss his hugs. I miss his texts. I miss his smile. I miss him calling me “chach” even though my name is Rachel. No one will ever call me that again & that hurts. I just miss my dad, so, so viscerally. Life will never be worth living like it was when my dad was here. And I’ve accepted it. There’s a small sense of victory in accepting that.
It's so hard to accept this new abnormal. I lost my oldest son three years ago 12/2. He was about to turn 30 on Christmas Eve. His brother and I haven't celebrated it since. I'm just existing now. Even shopping is hard because I am reminded constantly of him. Life feels like torture now. I'm trying....
I started a new job yesterday. My first day was a 9 hour shift. It was so so so exhausted but all I could think about was how I wish my mom was here. I know she would be so freaking proud of me for having my first job but it's just so hard to keep going though milestones without her
I'm sorry about your Mom. Nobody loves hearing the good things in your life, cheering you on like a Mom❤ Mines been gone for a number of years. I miss that unconditional love. I hope it brings you peace that I'm sure she would be so proud of you🥲
She WOULD be proud of you. New jobs are weirdly exhausting even if you’re excited about the job…and you put in 9 hours! Nicely done. I hope you got some rest today.
The life you have won't be the same again because you lost your beautiful wife ❤😢🙏. This is your new normal and your kids and family are there for you as well as your friends ❤🙏.
Dear Kyle, I've often thought that throughout our lives we lose ourselves...and rediscover ourselves...many times over. We are in a constant state of flux. Circumstances and events fundamentally change who we are. Sometimes, as with you, it's the loss of a loved one that changes us. It can also be a personal illness or an accident that robs us of function in some way. Or the loss of something like a calling/career/home etc. that we so closely identify with, we can't operate normally when it's taken from us. Think of the artist who loses their sight. Or a musician who loses their hearing. When we lose something so dear to us, we are forever altered. But we can adapt, and find joy in different ways, and in different things. Your beautiful Jenny was absolutely right....enjoy every moment of the things that do make you happy. Teaching, your friends and family, your beautiful children. Don't be afraid...you may find a slightly different version of yourself...but it will still be you at the core. With the same great values and good heart. And the same love and wisdom to pass on to Ellis and Winnie.
You’re absolutely right. That’s why, I know it was for me, that the second year of grief is almost harder than the first. Reality sets in and you realize that your person is never coming back and you will never be the same and your life will never be the same. That’s scary as hell!
You died too. This is why this is so hard because when you lose someone you loved this deeply, your old self is part of the grieving process too. Your death hurts you too. 😞😞💔💔
I Am not the same since hubby passed 19 yrs ago skin cancer...if my hubby came back he would Not recognise me. I grew up, 70 now, own my own home, move from deep south to midwest and just different now...I thank him for being in my life 18 yrs, taught me so much about love and life. D Anniversary is Jan 6th, (2005)....❤❤❤❤
My mother passed almost 42 years ago. My dad remarried . He still misses my mom. Can’t wait too see her in heaven . Your beautiful , strong, loving wife and mom should be remembered every day!
Those of us who have gone through true trauma and loss will never be the same, but what we do is carry on. Never give up, be kind, help others, be brave, and have impeccable intention. We have the duty to help ourselves and our children walk on with stability and love.❤
We never forget how beautiful human Jenny was. We all here miss her too. Her smile, her kindness, her wisdom. She was so special. And you Kyle will be never the same but you are the strongest man I ever "met". You have to fight for your better days, for smile of your beautiful children. I will tell you something- I'm 41 -disabled, no husband, no kids (because of my health) and I'm struggling for many years. It's very hard. We have to keep on going Kyle. I strongly believe you will be very happy someday. Jenny would want that. Greetings from Poland ❤ 🐞
I remember a video of Jen where she talked about grieving her old life and her old self. She said she wanted to be gentle on herself and kind to herself. She was wise and very honest about it as always. I wish you the same kindness Jen had for herself. One "good" thing I'm finding out about my new self after the loss is that there is a much deeper understanding of suffering, but also life. Because death, suffering and loneliness are so deeply intervined with life, but we always try to push it away. Maybe it's just a more raw and honest look, that offers connetions with others on a deep level. I'm thankful to be part of your grieving journey and I always will be.
Kyle you are in the abyss. You are not where/who you were and you’ve yet to become the person you’re going to be which will be incredible. Life is like nature, the most profound, magnificence moments and the most devastating, destructive moments. All you can do is all you can do, and you’re helping so many while sharing the journey.
Omg Kyle. Your sense of humor heals us all. The new Kyle is helping all of us on our own grief journey, whether it's loss, divorce, finances, etc. Never forget your worth.
My heart is with you. I find the last bit so profound and relatable. I can't go back to who I was either, and you're right, it's disappointing when I try. Thank you for sharing, I know you and your family have touched the hearts of so many.
you are doing so well Kyle. I lost all my family and didnt want to wake up in the morning . You do come out the other side of this pain and life is a new normal, It does change you as a person but you learn to live a different way and carry on. It takes time.. different time for differnet people. I still cant look at photos of my mum ten years on but I can talk about her without crying. be kind to yourself.
Kyle and children and Flower: I am thinking of you all as you are celebrating the joy of Christmas. RIP Jenny. You were a huge inspiration to me as I was diagnosed with AML on March 03, 2022. I had a n appointment with my oncologist on October 04, 2024. He pronounced me CANCER FREE and CURED! God bless you Appleton Family! I prayer for strength for all of Jenny's family and her loved ones.
Kyle, you are precious. Your humility and genuine posture before man and your creator are precious. The void you feel is grief, yes, but also, it is loneliness. You can ask Him for continued healing. Don’t Forget to pour your heart out to Him and ask for things. He hears
My husband just passed this past October. We had been married for 521/2 years. We dated two years and engaged two years prior our marriage. The first holidays without him. I know the pain you are feeling. I will be praying for both our families.❤️🙏🏼🙏🏼
You will never be the same. People who lose a spouse,change , they just do. We have to accept it and move forward . It is what it is. Just keep the life that you have and be grateful for the wonderful things in your life.
Kyle, never forget that you’re never alone in your grief and that so many of us including myself continue to hold both you & Jenny in our hearts and prayers each day. ~~~Love ❤️ and Christmas blessings to you, Winnie, & Ellis.
This is so true. Sometimes I mourn the person I was 20 years when my kids were little. My son and his wife are expecting their first child and it’s so exciting, but I miss MY little boy. And, I am a cancer thriver, with Stage 4 Breast cancer and pancreatic cancer. I so miss my old body from before all the surgeries, but all I can do is move forward. (Fortunately, I am currently NED.) What do they say? Change is the only constant. I am praying for you Kyle, that you will be to keep moving forward as this new changed person, who is sharing every day what you have learned from this journey with such authenticity and honesty.
@@susanmorgan774 Congrats on your NED and your coming grandchild. You can relive your sons childhood only this time you have none of the responsibility so it's even better!
We lost our son aged 21 14yrs ago and the grief never goes away Xmas was his favourite time of year so we all find it hard. My love to all your family remember Jenny and all the smiles and good times hold her in your heart and in the faces of your little ones god bless xx
You are right my husband of almost 30 yes passed 3 yes ago and I will never be the same again I still struggle with these holidays been watching alot of Jen shorts lately truly touching but realize it was alot because you loved heroine you did and do
I’m just starting down the path of having my spouse diagnosed with a brain tumor. Surgery scheduled for Dec. 20th, 2024. Embracing the ideas you just spoke about is my recent revelation about how I will never be the same too. This is how we start to heal the un-healable. This is how we discover who we are becoming… it is scary and oddly quieting. I wish you well.
when my mom was dying she handed me the serenity prayer and asked me to take it into my heart.. that did bring me some comfort when it finally made sense .
There's nothing you or anybody can do to fill the void that Jenny has left behind. But after what feels like forever, this becomes a new normal. I lost my mum 10 years ago next April and it is really difficult, you never completely get over it. But time goes on and you become stronger in the end
It’s hard when you find the right one to love. You were lucky there and the memories will be in your heart forever! ❤ I never had a love in my life that was true! 😌
I will always remember when Jenny was sharing how she greived for her healthy self when she suffered so much with Cancer. She was so courageous. And kyle i totally understand how true your statement was about never beeing the same . I pray that God will filled that empty longing for your beloved Jenny. May He give you grace for each day. You are loved i wish i could take your pain away. One day at a time . ✝️💙
You nailed it on the head! You now mourn your own old life. It hurts 😢so much to know you can’t get that life back . I pray we all find a new happy chapter in our lives .
You'll evolve to someplace different to what you expect. This is the impact of all life changing experiences. In the end, they make you a better person and more compassionate for the rest of your life. Grief doesn't stay the same (I lost a lover to cancer in 2015, I became disabled after an accident aged 12). Your counting your blessings is already part of life after a life altering experience like losing your person or becoming disabled. You'll never take anyone or anything for granted ever again.
Dear Kyle, Accepting that life does change is so incredibly difficult. Don’t be afraid that who you are now is somehow less than you have ever been. You are still a whole, wonderfully complete, and worthy human being who is walking a uniquely personal path. The essence of you will never change. Hugs.
Thank you for this video. It reminds us of what we have or don't have. Grief is hard..but you are doing amazing Kyle. Bless you all during the holiday season ❤
I think there must be a grief in all of our lives that change us forever. I fully get what you're saying. It's like joining a club that nobody wants to be a part of. One day at a time. X
You’re right. You won’t ever be the same. You will be better! Not in a bad way, and it will never take away from what you had with Jenny..that love will grow as well. Just wait! I have been broken in my life and I feel like you grow so much more than you realize while being broken, but never have I not came back better than before..even when it takes time. And it has always brought me closer to Jesus. I learned how to cling to Him. And when you’re tired or sad and don’t know what to pray or how to pray, just say Jesus. There is power in that name and that name can be a prayer. ❤️
Thank you so much for bringing up this topic, Kyle. I guess I hadn't considered this until you said it. You are not only grieving Jenny and your life together. You are grieving yourself. It is absolutely terrifying to know that you will never been the same, and that you can't go back. It's hard to even admit, because it feels like where does that leave you? Wanting to go back and to not have experienced the things you've experienced is such an empty feeling and an integral part of loss. Just know that everyone here remembers Jenny, and we all miss her dearly. You and Jenny created a community where everyone knows who she is, loves her, and will always remember her. I really hope your memories can bring you comfort and joy. And I hope the future brings a new you with more in common with the old you that you miss so much. That you get some of your happiness back and recognize those parts of you as comforting and familiar. Someone in the comments mentioned a video where Jenny talked about grieving herself before cancer. Unless it's still too soon or too triggering, you might want to find that video and see if your beautiful wife shared anything that might help you know you're not alone! From an outside perspective please know that you still seem like the same Kyle we've all come to love and respect over the past couple of years. Internally, you are forever changed. But externally, you are still the same funny, amazing young dad who loves fun drinks, math, vegan food, and all the fun and unique things that make you "you."
Jenny was so incredibly strong 💪 ❤ I have watched some older videos lately that I hadn’t seen before. She was one courageous woman and she fought so darn hard. We love your family too Kyle!
When I say my prayers at night I thank God for all he does for me and I tell him hug my family for me and tell them that life will never be the same without them. Much love
From the moment you met Jenny, you've never been the same.. She changed you (& you, her) from the start. That's why she lives in you, in your children, and in anyone she ever touched. Love lives on.
You have been forever changed with & by Jenny. Grief and Absence is grueling. But you are still you. And you are carrying her forward with you and she will continue to inform you. Sending you love.
Part of grief is mourning the loss of your old self. While I know that is incredibly painful, I just want you to know it’s also very typical- you are not alone Kyle. Sending each of you a big hug 💜
Life is like a major interstate highway system. There are construction signs, detours and very big potholes that if you fall in, destruction can follow. I lost my husband of 20 +years a little over 2 years ago. You are correct. Life will never be the same again. You will find as time goes on things are not necessarily easier. But you learn to go on and try to be the best you can be now. For you and your kids. Nothing that matters is easy. You have an incredibly strong support system. Your kids are great. Lean on that. And it will be okay.
Kyle my heart breaks for you on a consistent basis. Just know you’re not alone. So many of us have life altering events that we not only have to deal with but we also have to grieve the life we once had, the life that we wanted and can never get back and the person we once were. I totally understand. All we can do is pick up the pieces and try and put something together resembling a life and pray that someday peace will come. Having a thankful heart as you do I believe is the first step to the healing. Living with the anger and bitterness only seems to bring more pain. ❤
Death is always a shock but you will get better and you will move forward. Please give yourself some grace. It is still raw for you, but it will get better. Please don't short yourself in life. It will get better.
Stay strong Kyle you will make it through this hard time in your life. It breaks my heart to see you hurting so much. You are a very good daddy and your beautiful kids are going to help you get through this precious loss of their momma and your wife! You all are in my prayers! We love you back!🙏🙌🙏💜❤️🥰🥰
No we won't ever be the same. I've read that the process of grief is finding a way to be with the person who is gone. A major part of me is missing. As much as I can find moments of joy, I still can't wait to die so I can join him. I know it's hard. But we have no choice.
Many more times of joy will come your way when the time is right. This sheer joy will come when you least expect and it will surprise you and the kiddos. One thing we can always count on is change. Merry Christmas to you all and look up to Jenn watching down. ❤
No, you won't ever be the same again. I will never be the same after my husband's death. You will be different and yes grief sucks! You have done well and your children are doing well because of your strength and nurturing. Take care❤
I lost my mom 15 years ago, I have since gotten married and have had 3 kids, I still don’t think I am the happy go lucky person I once was no matter how many blessing I’ve received since then.
I was with my husband for 34 years, from our first date to our last "I love you" . I agree that you will never be the same man who loved Jenny. You will, (as I did for the last 9 years), adjust to the new you. You were/are a loving husband and a wonderful father and you will continue to be those things. Along the way you will find out things about yourself. - strengths/gifts you never knew you had. Your grief is still so fresh and the holidays make it even more difficult. As much as you are struggling now, know that you are doing the best you can every day. Be gentle with yourself. Hugs 💙
No grief does change you. The aim is to allow it to make one softer, stronger and kinder . If not one will get bitter and hard. But it is a difficult transition. Also grief never fully leaves one. So yes it can be lonely and everything you feel. But know that there is lots of hope for an outcome of refined gold. . Suffering does that in ways nothing else can unfortunately. God’s peace. 🙏🏼
Blessings be Yours, Kyle. You and those of us who have lost loved ones can never be the same, I agree. We re-emerge along with the brokeness we carry( and will always carry )as different beings. I can understand this pain and realization so well. I hope, in time, we will all manage to go on as best we can in these circumstances. In the meantime, we can live for those who couldn't and make them proud. Take care.
You’re moving through the grief. Believe it or not, this is POSITIVE. Acceptance. Of course you aren’t the same person as before, and of course you can never go back. But believe it or not you WILL eventually lean into your new normal. And then it won’t be a new normal it will be you. You’ll never forget Jenny, but she will be a beautiful memory, not an emptiness. And she will always be your kids mom. You’ll be able to look back at the beauty and take that into your NEXT normal. Take care ❤
I feel you, Kyle. I miss my dad so much, he died in an accident and was extremely healthy. An ACCIDENT! The unfairness of life really gets to me sometimes, and I count you as part of that equation.
Kyle it takes a long time to start feeling a little bit more of the person you were. After all you lost the love of your life. Those children are always a reminder of the love you and Jenny shared. Always remember she is always with you, threw your good days and your bad. Stay strong and embrace those children.
That’s ok… it’s growth. You will never be the same but you had a beautiful life with Jenny… but you have wonderful memories to cherish. You are growing and are there for your children. You will move forward, continually growing as a parent and raising wonderful children. It’s ok to be sad. 😢🙏🏻🙏🏻 I’m praying that you have the strength to create a new life for you and the children. ❤️
Sweetheart you are right. Your life has changed and will not be same again. Day by day…… day by day…. Don’t look ahead. I’m so sorry you and your family are going through this. Maybe go to grief counseling if you haven’t already…. Time is a great healer. God bless you… God will carry you through.
I so appreciate your commentary. I’ve not been through what you’ve been through or even close. I had a complete mental health breakdown 15 years. I keep fighting to return to who I was. You helped me realize that person is gone. I’ll never teach again and my children are all grown into independent young women. I agree it’s scary. If I’m not a mom of young children or teacher then who the heck am I? I’m 60. What do I do for the rest of my life? I can’t work or volunteer for many reasons. You expressed so beautifully what I’ve been trying to put into words for months, maybe years. Thank you…your words go beyond the cancer world. Thank you.
Kyle. Even though you have that lonely feeling. Please know you're never alone. I understand what you mean and i know Jenny was your rock and amazing partner and friend. Life gives everyone a twist at some point and sometimes when you start thinking one way or feeling one way, it may twist again and on and on. Just remember you have so many people that are on a journey of their own along with you and your journey and i think it's safe to say we all love you back.❤
Wow that is deep and so profound, you are a different person now and your life is different.....my heart hurts for you that it is this way for you and your family. My husband left after 24 of being together so not the same by any means but I totally understand the empty loneliness void. I see why Jenny loved you so much you quirkiness and spirit are amazing. God bless you Kyle.
Kyle you and the kids are doing amazing. You are incredible. I’m glad we can all be here for you. It will take years to accept and even think of meeting anyone else if you ever want to that it. Jenny is your soul mate. Give yourself time. A year is nothing. Look how far you have come. Always here for you xxx
What you said about not being the same is so true. My husband died in October and Im having such a hard time trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do without him. I’m not the same person and you’re right it is scary because now I have to figure out who I am. Thank you for validating that feeling.
Kyle! I have been praying for you and your family!!! Life will never be the same! In everything that happens to us we change, we grow and we learn! You have been a great parent thru all of this!!! Staying strong and positive is so vital in your grieving process! You’ve done it! Just know that I pray for you all everyday!!!
One day at a time….. one foot in front of the other….. embracing where you are in the process. Keep hanging in there. You’re doing a great job with the kids and you’ve come a long way this past year. We’re all still praying for you and the kids. God bless you all.
I lost my daughter suddenly from a pulmonary embolism jan 28th, 2023. I am not the same person I was before jan 28th. Life is split in before jan 28th and after jan 28th. She was my only child and life will never be the same. Christmas 2023 was not normal and if never will be. But I do search for blessings because they are there.
You are doing such a good job, Kyle! No, your life will never be the same. But you’ll learn to move on. My twin sister was just diagnosed with lung cancer that had already spread to her ribs and spine. She’s been successful so far with radiation and chemo but I know enough about cancer that she’s in for an up and down ride. CANCER SUCKS!
Holidays are truly the hardest. They make you long for the life you used to have. I can see you are making progress, Kyle. I will say that when I finally stopped trying to keep the old life, I began to move forward. When I stopped dwelling on my old life and started thinking about my new life, I was much happier. It’s not easy. But, you will move forward. Merry Christmas to you and your precious children!
Jenny was an angel on earth and now she is an angel in Heaven watching over all of you. I know it is torture every day, we lost our only son, it will be seven years on Christmas Day. He was only 41 years old, got the Noro virus and his heart stopped, they didn’t get him back in time. He had a 12 year old daughter and a wife, we were all so close and I know I will never be the same either. I know it is a different feeling to loose your wife then it is to loose a child but it still hurts so much. It does get a little easier with time but they are always right there and I still talk to my son everyday, I just wish he was here and that is not going to happen. Hang in there Kyle, you do have a lot of family support, I know you are thankful for that. I hope you and your children have a nice Christmas. ❤️🎄💔🎄❤️
My son died, I will never be the same! You are doing great!! The kids are keeping you alive, routine and purpose! 🙏🙏
Oh my gosh! How old was he? I’m so sorry mothers should never have to lose thier child! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🥲
My condolences 😢
I’m 21, I have a 2 1/2 year old son and I’m 31 weeks pregnant with a second baby boy I genuinely can not imagine the unbearable pain you must have felt and still feel no matter what age he was I can only some what understand because both of my best friends passed away a year apart both at 18 and that was devastating I can’t imagine what both of their family’s still feel. I hope you are doing ok but it’s ok to not feel ok aswell life is truly unfair
Time to live n be happy
I totally understand... I lost my son as well and it truly changes everything, even the person you used to be. From one grieving momma to another, I know your pain 💔❤️
No, life will never be the same. But you can survive. You must. If nothing else, for the kids. You promised Jenny. You are really growing as a parent. Just remember life is not a straight line. Neither is grief. You got this🎉❤
Great comment ❤️
Beautiful!❤
I lost my husband late 2023 and it has been hard to watch you go through your grief, too. But I read something that says we don't just lose them once. It's over and over, with each memory, each holiday, each anything!
Validation of the grief is so important because the loss of a spouse is so much more intense. I've lost a twin, parents, siblings, cousins, friends. Loss of my spouse has been the biggest gut-punch.
You are seen and heard!
Beautiful, kind and so true, Kyle is amazingly heard by so many good people.
I am 66. I am not the person i was at 26.... not because i am older, but because of all that has happened in those years.
The people in my life who have died, the people in my life who have grown up into adults, the people in my life who have moved on from me or who i have moved on from..... it all changes who you are as a person. But i would say the memories are precious and will stay with me forever giving me comfort and joy.
Youll never be the same, ever kyle. My mother died on jan. 12th, at 6:20am. 15 yrs ago. She LOVED CHRISTMAS. WE BAKED COOKIES TOGETHER MY ENTIRE LIFE. I HAVENT BAKED IN 15 YRS, I ORDER THEM. WE DECORATED TOGETHER AT HER HOME AND MINE. I HAVENT DECORATED OR EVEN HAD A TREE IN 15 YEARS. A FEW WEEKS AGO I HAD A DREAM, WELL I BELIEVE IT WAS AN ACTUAL VISION. MY MOTHER APPEARED TO ME WITH OUTSTRETCHED ARMS, KISSED BOTH MY CHEEKS, AND CLEARLY TOLD ME IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO MOVE ON WITH AS MANY YEARS AS I HAVE LEFT ON THIS EARTH. IM 67, AND IVE PRAYED FOR 15 YEARS THAT GOD WOULD TAKE ME HOME. MY MOTHER TOLD ME ITS NOT MY TIME, THAT WE WILL B TOGETHER IN GODS TIMING AGAIN. SHE TOLD ME ITS TIME TO STOP GRIEVING. SHE TOLD ME TO STOP CRYING,. SHE TOLD ME TO CELEBRATE XMAS THIS YEAR. AND THANK GOD FOR MY SONS, OTHER MEMBERS OF OUR FAMILY, AND THE GOOD FRIENDS GOD HAS PLACED INTO MY LIFE. SHE LOOKED LIKE SHE WAS AROUND 30 YRS OLD, AND SO HAPPY AND SO HEALTHY. WELL....I TOOK THAT VISION SERIOUSLY. MY ENTIRE HOME IS DECORATED, I NOT ONLY HAVE ONE TREE, I HAVE TWO TREES! AND I HAVE SOME XMAS SPIRIT IN MY SOUL FOR ONCE IN 15 YRS. THE LAST THING SHE SAID TO ME WAS.....WHY WOULD YOU BE SO SAD ON HOLIDAYS, WHEN YOU KNOW I AM HEALTHY AND BLISSFUL? IM FINALLY FREE OF MY SICKKY EARTHLY BODY!! AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU MY DEAR SWEET DAUGHTER, IF I HAD A CHOICE TO COME BACK TO YOU, OR STAY HERE. I WOULD REMAIN HERE. WHEN ITS YOUR TIME,,,YOU WILL SURELY UNDERSTAND. AND SHE FADED AWAY. SO, HAPPY HOLIDAYS, MERRY CHRISTMAS, AND A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN.
That’s so beautiful ❤ Thankyou for sharing 😢❤
Yes, thank you for sharing. That’s beautiful. I always fear the same. My mom absolutely loves Christmas. She puts up her beautiful Christmas village at home, that’s on 4 six foot tables, full of faux snow, villages, towns, roads, scenery, people, shops, animals. It’s truly amazing. She’s 70, I’m 49. However, she is healthier than me so you never know.
I do think it’s just wonderful that you had this vision and decided to enjoy Christmas. What your mom told you is absolutely right. ❤
your comment moved me to tears. my mom had also dreamt of her mom before, letting her know that she was okay and that she would be okay too. 🫶🏼 i hope you never a wonderful Christmas!
God bless you Bonnie. This brought happy tears to my eyes. God bless you! We will all be together again with our Lord and Saviour!
That was your mom. I’m the same. I can’t. I need signs. Have you watched Next Level Soul on UA-cam? We don’t die. These signs are real. At least that’s what I’m holding on to.
Dear Kyle, you won’t be the same you will be forged in steel by the suffering you have been through. You will be a stronger finer more compassionate person with a great capacity for love. You are very much loved ❤❤❤
You just have to KNOW that this is NOT forever. You will learn this in time, but now humor is your saving grace❤
None of us can remain the same year after year. Your circumstances have changed. Even if you meet a new woman it won’t be the same. BUT you can find happiness again. You’re still in the grief process. Don’t fear the change. Love the memories, love each other. You will get thru this. ❤️
Thanks, I'm going through grief, loss of husband of 65 years. It is hard, at 85 years of age myself. Loss of close friends, siblings, not anything close friends. I'm living in a Christian community with Jesus as our common friend.
I try to stay positive. Your doing great with your children as they have loss as well.
Bless your heart. I don't even have the words, bless your heart....
I was numb for three years. (Unexpected death)
I didn’t reach out, I didn’t phone, text… nothing. I went to work and pretended to be ok and that took everything I had. I existed. Not a shred more.
Be patient. That was nearly 20 years ago and I’ve lived a fairly happy life for the last ten.
The thing is we die too. At least the person that we used to be, and we are left to build a new self out of what is left. We are NOT the same.
I can relate to this 100%, as my dad (and best friend for life) died in an accident last year. And I found him, clinging to life. I watched him die a painful death and there was nothing I could do. It wrecked me, and I didn’t ask for help either. People thought I seemed too “normal” for what had occurred, but little did they know I was grasping at life just like my dad did that day.
I’m still not okay, almost 2 years later. Not okay at all. It’s not FAIR that he’s gone. I MISS his genuine personality, never ending love, constant camaraderie & laughter. I miss his reasonable but positive advice in tough situations. I miss his voice, I miss his hugs. I miss his texts. I miss his smile. I miss him calling me “chach” even though my name is Rachel. No one will ever call me that again & that hurts. I just miss my dad, so, so viscerally.
Life will never be worth living like it was when my dad was here. And I’ve accepted it. There’s a small sense of victory in accepting that.
@ Im so sorry. I felt like that too. I can feel your despair. Sympathetic hugs from Alberta.
@@imjonesy5239 thank you so much, I really appreciate it 🥹
Same happened to me 34 yrs ago now and you are right, We die too a new self💔
It's so hard to accept this new abnormal. I lost my oldest son three years ago 12/2. He was about to turn 30 on Christmas Eve. His brother and I haven't celebrated it since. I'm just existing now. Even shopping is hard because I am reminded constantly of him. Life feels like torture now. I'm trying....
I started a new job yesterday. My first day was a 9 hour shift. It was so so so exhausted but all I could think about was how I wish my mom was here. I know she would be so freaking proud of me for having my first job but it's just so hard to keep going though milestones without her
I'm sorry about your Mom. Nobody loves hearing the good things in your life, cheering you on like a Mom❤ Mines been gone for a number of years. I miss that unconditional love. I hope it brings you peace that I'm sure she would be so proud of you🥲
Your Mom is so proud of you. Never doubt that. Her love for you is with you forever. 🫂💞
She WOULD be proud of you. New jobs are weirdly exhausting even if you’re excited about the job…and you put in 9 hours! Nicely done. I hope you got some rest today.
The life you have won't be the same again because you lost your beautiful wife ❤😢🙏. This is your new normal and your kids and family are there for you as well as your friends ❤🙏.
Dear Kyle, I've often thought that throughout our lives we lose ourselves...and rediscover ourselves...many times over. We are in a constant state of flux. Circumstances and events fundamentally change who we are. Sometimes, as with you, it's the loss of a loved one that changes us. It can also be a personal illness or an accident that robs us of function in some way. Or the loss of something like a calling/career/home etc. that we so closely identify with, we can't operate normally when it's taken from us. Think of the artist who loses their sight. Or a musician who loses their hearing. When we lose something so dear to us, we are forever altered. But we can adapt, and find joy in different ways, and in different things. Your beautiful Jenny was absolutely right....enjoy every moment of the things that do make you happy. Teaching, your friends and family, your beautiful children. Don't be afraid...you may find a slightly different version of yourself...but it will still be you at the core. With the same great values and good heart. And the same love and wisdom to pass on to Ellis and Winnie.
Beautiful 😢❤❤❤
You’re absolutely right. That’s why, I know it was for me, that the second year of grief is almost harder than the first. Reality sets in and you realize that your person is never coming back and you will never be the same and your life will never be the same. That’s scary as hell!
❤
You died too. This is why this is so hard because when you lose someone you loved this deeply, your old self is part of the grieving process too. Your death hurts you too. 😞😞💔💔
I Am not the same since hubby passed 19 yrs ago skin cancer...if my hubby came back he would Not recognise me. I grew up, 70 now, own my own home, move from deep south to midwest and just different now...I thank him for being in my life 18 yrs, taught me so much about love and life. D Anniversary is Jan 6th, (2005)....❤❤❤❤
My mother passed almost 42 years ago. My dad remarried . He still misses my mom. Can’t wait too see her in heaven .
Your beautiful , strong, loving wife and mom should be remembered every day!
Those of us who have gone through true trauma and loss will never be the same, but what we do is carry on. Never give up, be kind, help others, be brave, and have impeccable intention. We have the duty to help ourselves and our children walk on with stability and love.❤
Our loved one expects it.🎉
Never stop friend
We never forget how beautiful human Jenny was. We all here miss her too. Her smile, her kindness, her wisdom. She was so special. And you Kyle will be never the same but you are the strongest man I ever "met". You have to fight for your better days, for smile of your beautiful children. I will tell you something- I'm 41 -disabled, no husband, no kids (because of my health) and I'm struggling for many years. It's very hard. We have to keep on going Kyle. I strongly believe you will be very happy someday. Jenny would want that. Greetings from Poland ❤ 🐞
I remember a video of Jen where she talked about grieving her old life and her old self. She said she wanted to be gentle on herself and kind to herself. She was wise and very honest about it as always. I wish you the same kindness Jen had for herself. One "good" thing I'm finding out about my new self after the loss is that there is a much deeper understanding of suffering, but also life. Because death, suffering and loneliness are so deeply intervined with life, but we always try to push it away. Maybe it's just a more raw and honest look, that offers connetions with others on a deep level. I'm thankful to be part of your grieving journey and I always will be.
Kyle you are in the abyss. You are not where/who you were and you’ve yet to become the person you’re going to be which will be incredible. Life is like nature, the most profound, magnificence moments and the most devastating, destructive moments. All you can do is all you can do, and you’re helping so many while sharing the journey.
Omg Kyle. Your sense of humor heals us all. The new Kyle is helping all of us on our own grief journey, whether it's loss, divorce, finances, etc. Never forget your worth.
Agreed 👍
We love you Kyle. It makes me so sad to see your pain. The hardest thing is losing someone we love so dearly. Jenny was such a beautiful soul.
Yes, it is hard to see your pain, Kyle. Praying for you.
My heart is with you. I find the last bit so profound and relatable. I can't go back to who I was either, and you're right, it's disappointing when I try. Thank you for sharing, I know you and your family have touched the hearts of so many.
No - you won’t ever be the same…
That doesn’t mean you won’t ever be happy again…
You will 💖
That’s right all in time . ❤ good things will come your way ❤
you are doing so well Kyle. I lost all my family and didnt want to wake up in the morning . You do come out the other side of this pain and life is a new normal, It does change you as a person but you learn to live a different way and carry on. It takes time.. different time for differnet people. I still cant look at photos of my mum ten years on but I can talk about her without crying. be kind to yourself.
Kyle and children and Flower: I am thinking of you all as you are celebrating the joy of Christmas. RIP Jenny. You were a huge inspiration to me as I was diagnosed with AML on March 03, 2022. I had a n appointment with my oncologist on October 04, 2024. He pronounced me CANCER FREE and CURED! God bless you Appleton Family! I prayer for strength for all of Jenny's family and her loved ones.
Truth, grief and loss changes us forever.
Kyle, you're so correct, life will never be the same as it was. Just take each day as it comes and passes now and make it something special.
Kyle, you are precious. Your humility and genuine posture before man and your creator are precious.
The void you feel is grief, yes, but also, it is loneliness.
You can ask Him for continued healing. Don’t
Forget to pour your heart out to Him and ask for things.
He hears
My husband just passed this past October. We had been married for 521/2 years. We dated two years and engaged two years prior our marriage. The first holidays without him. I know the pain you are feeling. I will be praying for both our families.❤️🙏🏼🙏🏼
You will never be the same. People who lose a spouse,change , they just do. We have to accept it and move forward . It is what it is. Just keep the life that you have and be grateful for the wonderful things in your life.
Yes, she has taught so many to “embrace the bad, enjoy what you have”. She, and you, have changed my life because of her brave example.🌸
You are a wonderful person and the best dad! And the best dad can also have bad days, breakdowns...but what you do is amazing!
Your kids are the one who give you strength.
You are a wise soul.
Kyle, never forget that you’re never alone in your grief and that so many of us including myself continue to hold both you & Jenny in our hearts and prayers each day. ~~~Love ❤️ and Christmas blessings to you, Winnie, & Ellis.
None of us stay the same through life. Life events shape and mould us into who we were destined to be. It takes a lot of acceptance and resilience.
This is so true. Sometimes I mourn the person I was 20 years when my kids were little. My son and his wife are expecting their first child and it’s so exciting, but I miss MY little boy.
And, I am a cancer thriver, with Stage 4 Breast cancer and pancreatic cancer. I so miss my old body from before all the surgeries, but all I can do is move forward. (Fortunately, I am currently NED.)
What do they say? Change is the only constant.
I am praying for you Kyle, that you will be to keep moving forward as this new changed person, who is sharing every day what you have learned from this journey with such authenticity and honesty.
@@susanmorgan774 Congrats on your NED and your coming grandchild. You can relive your sons childhood only this time you have none of the responsibility so it's even better!
We lost our son aged 21 14yrs ago and the grief never goes away Xmas was his favourite time of year so we all find it hard. My love to all your family remember Jenny and all the smiles and good times hold her in your heart and in the faces of your little ones god bless xx
Jenny was so very blessed to have you as her husband. Your beautiful children are so blessed to have you as their daddy. ❤
You are right my husband of almost 30 yes passed 3 yes ago and I will never be the same again I still struggle with these holidays been watching alot of Jen shorts lately truly touching but realize it was alot because you loved heroine you did and do
I’m just starting down the path of having my spouse diagnosed with a brain tumor. Surgery scheduled for Dec. 20th, 2024. Embracing the ideas you just spoke about is my recent revelation about how I will never be the same too. This is how we start to heal the un-healable. This is how we discover who we are becoming… it is scary and oddly quieting. I wish you well.
when my mom was dying she handed me the serenity prayer and asked me to take it into my heart.. that did bring me some comfort when it finally made sense .
There's nothing you or anybody can do to fill the void that Jenny has left behind. But after what feels like forever, this becomes a new normal. I lost my mum 10 years ago next April and it is really difficult, you never completely get over it. But time goes on and you become stronger in the end
It’s hard when you find the right one to love. You were lucky there and the memories will be in your heart forever! ❤ I never had a love in my life that was true! 😌
I will always remember when Jenny was sharing how she greived for her healthy self when she suffered so much with Cancer. She was so courageous. And kyle i totally understand how true your statement was about never beeing the same . I pray that God will filled that empty longing for your beloved Jenny. May He give you grace for each day. You are loved i wish i could take your pain away. One day at a time . ✝️💙
You're right. You're never the same. I lost my brother when I was younger, then my parents. We were very close. I will never be the same person. 😢
You nailed it on the head! You now mourn your own old life. It hurts 😢so much to know you can’t get that life back . I pray we all find a new happy chapter in our lives .
You are precious Kyle, great parent, excellent communicator with your following. We love you.
You'll evolve to someplace different to what you expect. This is the impact of all life changing experiences. In the end, they make you a better person and more compassionate for the rest of your life. Grief doesn't stay the same (I lost a lover to cancer in 2015, I became disabled after an accident aged 12). Your counting your blessings is already part of life after a life altering experience like losing your person or becoming disabled. You'll never take anyone or anything for granted ever again.
Dear Kyle, Accepting that life does change is so incredibly difficult. Don’t be afraid that who you are now is somehow less than you have ever been. You are still a whole, wonderfully complete, and worthy human being who is walking a uniquely personal path. The essence of you will never change. Hugs.
Thank you for this video. It reminds us of what we have or don't have. Grief is hard..but you are doing amazing Kyle. Bless you all during the holiday season ❤
When you loose someone you love, it changes you forever.
This was a beautiful and timely message. I miss my parents so much at this time of year especially. Thank you Kyle, you're doing a wonderful job.
Jenny will be so proud of you. You’re doing so well despite your grief.
I think there must be a grief in all of our lives that change us forever. I fully get what you're saying. It's like joining a club that nobody wants to be a part of. One day at a time. X
None of us are ever the same life is ever changing. Have a great evening!
You’re right. You won’t ever be the same. You will be better! Not in a bad way, and it will never take away from what you had with Jenny..that love will grow as well. Just wait! I have been broken in my life and I feel like you grow so much more than you realize while being broken, but never have I not came back better than before..even when it takes time. And it has always brought me closer to Jesus. I learned how to cling to Him. And when you’re tired or sad and don’t know what to pray or how to pray, just say Jesus. There is power in that name and that name can be a prayer. ❤️
I will never forget dear Jenny❤...she was wonderful. My heart breaks for you, Ellis & Winnie.... ❤
Same xx
Thank you so much for bringing up this topic, Kyle. I guess I hadn't considered this until you said it. You are not only grieving Jenny and your life together. You are grieving yourself. It is absolutely terrifying to know that you will never been the same, and that you can't go back. It's hard to even admit, because it feels like where does that leave you? Wanting to go back and to not have experienced the things you've experienced is such an empty feeling and an integral part of loss. Just know that everyone here remembers Jenny, and we all miss her dearly. You and Jenny created a community where everyone knows who she is, loves her, and will always remember her. I really hope your memories can bring you comfort and joy. And I hope the future brings a new you with more in common with the old you that you miss so much. That you get some of your happiness back and recognize those parts of you as comforting and familiar. Someone in the comments mentioned a video where Jenny talked about grieving herself before cancer. Unless it's still too soon or too triggering, you might want to find that video and see if your beautiful wife shared anything that might help you know you're not alone!
From an outside perspective please know that you still seem like the same Kyle we've all come to love and respect over the past couple of years. Internally, you are forever changed. But externally, you are still the same funny, amazing young dad who loves fun drinks, math, vegan food, and all the fun and unique things that make you "you."
One step at a time… ❤ you are a wonderful dad❤️
Jenny was so incredibly strong 💪 ❤ I have watched some older videos lately that I hadn’t seen before. She was one courageous woman and she fought so darn hard. We love your family too Kyle!
When I say my prayers at night I thank God for all he does for me and I tell him hug my family for me and tell them that life will never be the same without them. Much love
From the moment you met Jenny, you've never been the same.. She changed you (& you, her) from the start. That's why she lives in you, in your children, and in anyone she ever touched. Love lives on.
beautiful words
Kyle, the kids are so blessed to have you for their Dad. Keep that sense of humor and do the best you can. Happy Holidays to your family ❤.
You’ll find your normal. You will get up each day and breathe and love your kids. You’ll find ways to fill your heart and you will be ok.
You have been forever changed with & by Jenny. Grief and Absence is grueling. But you are still you. And you are carrying her forward with you and she will continue to inform you. Sending you love.
Part of grief is mourning the loss of your old self. While I know that is incredibly painful, I just want you to know it’s also very typical- you are not alone Kyle. Sending each of you a big hug 💜
Life is like a major interstate highway system. There are construction signs, detours and very big potholes that if you fall in, destruction can follow. I lost my husband of 20 +years a little over 2 years ago. You are correct. Life will never be the same again. You will find as time goes on things are not necessarily easier. But you learn to go on and try to be the best you can be now. For you and your kids. Nothing that matters is easy. You have an incredibly strong support system. Your kids are great. Lean on that. And it will be okay.
I'm so sorry Kyle. Sending you many prayers for peace and comfort 🙏🙏🙏
Kyle my heart breaks for you on a consistent basis. Just know you’re not alone. So many of us have life altering events that we not only have to deal with but we also have to grieve the life we once had, the life that we wanted and can never get back and the person we once were. I totally understand. All we can do is pick up the pieces and try and put something together resembling a life and pray that someday peace will come. Having a thankful heart as you do I believe is the first step to the healing. Living with the anger and bitterness only seems to bring more pain. ❤
Death is always a shock but you will get better and you will move forward. Please give yourself some grace. It is still raw for you, but it will get better. Please don't short yourself in life. It will get better.
Stay strong Kyle you will make it through this hard time in your life. It breaks my heart to see you hurting so much. You are a very good daddy and your beautiful kids are going to help you get through this precious loss of their momma and your wife! You all are in my prayers! We love you back!🙏🙌🙏💜❤️🥰🥰
No we won't ever be the same. I've read that the process of grief is finding a way to be with the person who is gone. A major part of me is missing. As much as I can find moments of joy, I still can't wait to die so I can join him. I know it's hard. But we have no choice.
Hi Kyle, your old life will never be the same, but you will make a new life that is different. You will never forget Jenny xx ❤
That’s true for all of us…everything that happens to us in life will change us.
We love you right back, Kyle.
Kyle, sending many hugs. Somehow you will push through, as you always do. Sending Christmas wishes to you and the kids.
Many more times of joy will come your way when the time is right. This sheer joy will come when you least expect and it will surprise you and the kiddos. One thing we can always count on is change. Merry Christmas to you all and look up to Jenn watching down. ❤
No, you won't ever be the same again. I will never be the same after my husband's death. You will be different and yes grief sucks! You have done well and your children are doing well because of your strength and nurturing. Take care❤
You are doing great kid! Jenny is proud of you, you are gonna be ok ❤❤
Such a great person you are!
Jenny taught us so much. Lots of love and hugs. Many prayers.😊
I lost my mom 15 years ago, I have since gotten married and have had 3 kids, I still don’t think I am the happy go lucky person I once was no matter how many blessing I’ve received since then.
I was with my husband for 34 years, from our first date to our last "I love you" . I agree that you will never be the same man who loved Jenny. You will, (as I did for the last 9 years), adjust to the new you. You were/are a loving husband and a wonderful father and you will continue to be those things. Along the way you will find out things about yourself. - strengths/gifts you never knew you had. Your grief is still so fresh and the holidays make it even more difficult. As much as you are struggling now, know that you are doing the best you can every day. Be gentle with yourself. Hugs 💙
No grief does change you. The aim is to allow it to make one softer, stronger and kinder . If not one will get bitter and hard. But it is a difficult transition. Also grief never fully leaves one. So yes it can be lonely and everything you feel. But know that there is lots of hope for an outcome of refined gold. . Suffering does that in ways nothing else can unfortunately. God’s peace. 🙏🏼
Blessings be Yours, Kyle. You and those of us who have lost loved ones can never be the same, I agree. We re-emerge along with the brokeness we carry( and will always carry )as different beings. I can understand this pain and realization so well. I hope, in time, we will all manage to go on as best we can in these circumstances. In the meantime, we can live for those who couldn't and make them proud. Take care.
You’re moving through the grief. Believe it or not, this is POSITIVE. Acceptance. Of course you aren’t the same person as before, and of course you can never go back. But believe it or not you WILL eventually lean into your new normal. And then it won’t be a new normal it will be you. You’ll never forget Jenny, but she will be a beautiful memory, not an emptiness. And she will always be your kids mom. You’ll be able to look back at the beauty and take that into your NEXT normal. Take care ❤
I feel you, Kyle. I miss my dad so much, he died in an accident and was extremely healthy. An ACCIDENT! The unfairness of life really gets to me sometimes, and I count you as part of that equation.
Kyle it takes a long time to start feeling a little bit more of the person
you were. After all you lost the love of your life.
Those children are always a reminder of the love you and Jenny shared.
Always remember she is always with you, threw your good days and your bad.
Stay strong and embrace those children.
That’s ok… it’s growth. You will never be the same but you had a beautiful life with Jenny… but you have wonderful memories to cherish. You are growing and are there for your children. You will move forward, continually growing as a parent and raising wonderful children. It’s ok to be sad. 😢🙏🏻🙏🏻 I’m praying that you have the strength to create a new life for you and the children. ❤️
Sweetheart you are right. Your life has changed and will not be same again. Day by day…… day by day…. Don’t look ahead. I’m so sorry you and your family are going through this. Maybe go to grief counseling if you haven’t already…. Time is a great healer. God bless you… God will carry you through.
I so appreciate your commentary. I’ve not been through what you’ve been through or even close. I had a complete mental health breakdown 15 years. I keep fighting to return to who I was. You helped me realize that person is gone. I’ll never teach again and my children are all grown into independent young women. I agree it’s scary. If I’m not a mom of young children or teacher then who the heck am I? I’m 60. What do I do for the rest of my life? I can’t work or volunteer for many reasons. You expressed so beautifully what I’ve been trying to put into words for months, maybe years. Thank you…your words go beyond the cancer world. Thank you.
Kyle. Even though you have that lonely feeling. Please know you're never alone. I understand what you mean and i know Jenny was your rock and amazing partner and friend. Life gives everyone a twist at some point and sometimes when you start thinking one way or feeling one way, it may twist again and on and on. Just remember you have so many people that are on a journey of their own along with you and your journey and i think it's safe to say we all love you back.❤
Wow that is deep and so profound, you are a different person now and your life is different.....my heart hurts for you that it is this way for you and your family. My husband left after 24 of being together so not the same by any means but I totally understand the empty loneliness void. I see why Jenny loved you so much you quirkiness and spirit are amazing. God bless you Kyle.
Maybe never the same, but will be great. Trust me. you will always have your little angels. time is an amazing healer.
Kyle you and the kids are doing amazing. You are incredible. I’m glad we can all be here for you. It will take years to accept and even think of meeting anyone else if you ever want to that it. Jenny is your soul mate. Give yourself time. A year is nothing. Look how far you have come. Always here for you xxx
What you said about not being the same is so true. My husband died in October and Im having such a hard time trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do without him. I’m not the same person and you’re right it is scary because now I have to figure out who I am. Thank you for validating that feeling.
Kyle! I have been praying for you and your family!!! Life will never be the same! In everything that happens to us we change, we grow and we learn! You have been a great parent thru all of this!!! Staying strong and positive is so vital in your grieving process! You’ve done it! Just know that I pray for you all everyday!!!
One day at a time….. one foot in front of the other….. embracing where you are in the process. Keep hanging in there. You’re doing a great job with the kids and you’ve come a long way this past year. We’re all still praying for you and the kids. God bless you all.
I lost my daughter suddenly from a pulmonary embolism jan 28th, 2023. I am not the same person I was before jan 28th. Life is split in before jan 28th and after jan 28th. She was my only child and life will never be the same. Christmas 2023 was not normal and if never will be. But I do search for blessings because they are there.
Keep up with the great work..Kyle you are awesome Jenny is looking down So very proud
You are doing such a good job, Kyle! No, your life will never be the same. But you’ll learn to move on. My twin sister was just diagnosed with lung cancer that had already spread to her ribs and spine. She’s been successful so far with radiation and chemo but I know enough about cancer that she’s in for an up and down ride. CANCER SUCKS!
Holidays are truly the hardest. They make you long for the life you used to have. I can see you are making progress, Kyle. I will say that when I finally stopped trying to keep the old life, I began to move forward. When I stopped dwelling on my old life and started thinking about my new life, I was much happier. It’s not easy. But, you will move forward. Merry Christmas to you and your precious children!
Jenny was an angel on earth and now she is an angel in Heaven watching over all of you. I know it is torture every day, we lost our only son, it will be seven years on Christmas Day. He was only 41 years old, got the Noro virus and his heart stopped, they didn’t get him back in time. He had a 12 year old daughter and a wife, we were all so close and I know I will never be the same either. I know it is a different feeling to loose your wife then it is to loose a child but it still hurts so much. It does get a little easier with time but they are always right there and I still talk to my son everyday, I just wish he was here and that is not going to happen.
Hang in there Kyle, you do have a lot of family support, I know you are thankful for that.
I hope you and your children have a nice Christmas.
❤️🎄💔🎄❤️