Ready Meal Eggstravaganza | Ashens

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  • Опубліковано 14 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 3,3 тис.

  • @brandonboogers
    @brandonboogers 9 років тому +2907

    Ashens: "Hey Dan"
    Dan: *throws up*

    • @wolfyboy
      @wolfyboy 9 років тому +2

      +Anal “Negro” Avacado XD ROFL!!

    • @goldengames8792
      @goldengames8792 9 років тому +10

      thats how aids started.

    • @JayyJayyTripz
      @JayyJayyTripz 9 років тому +6

      your name and pic TURN ME ON.

    • @goldengames8792
      @goldengames8792 9 років тому +1

      JayJay- tripz hi ball bag😨👳💰💣🔌🎃

    • @TheKilman102
      @TheKilman102 8 років тому +3

      hi bonzy

  • @Consural
    @Consural 7 років тому +959

    **Ashens looks towards the general direction of Dan**
    **Dan starts throwing up**

  • @BobofWOGGLE
    @BobofWOGGLE 9 років тому +2052

    "Don't eat it, Stuart, you're gonna get sick"
    Dan, do you not understand the purpose of this channel?

    • @felixbuzz
      @felixbuzz 9 років тому +21

      +Bob Woggle Retro tat and pop stations?

    • @aaronfaulkes
      @aaronfaulkes 9 років тому +10

      Shut the fuck up

    • @bitchy-cryptid
      @bitchy-cryptid 9 років тому +2

      +Bob Woggle Dan said that just as I read your comment haha

    • @YuraChan88
      @YuraChan88 9 років тому +17

      plus this wasn't the worst egg he's ever had. If you seen the 1000 year egg

    • @inquisitivebeyblade8598
      @inquisitivebeyblade8598 7 років тому +6

      Spazzoid 100 year egg I believe.

  • @Marscow
    @Marscow 9 років тому +487

    So what DOES Dan eat? It seems everything processed makes him gag violently. I picture him as a gnome who lives in a magical garden and lives only on fresh strawberries and love.

    • @zombiehalo9588
      @zombiehalo9588 2 роки тому +19

      He's vegan now

    • @mattymerr701
      @mattymerr701 2 роки тому +62

      @@zombiehalo9588 so not much then?

    • @zombiehalo9588
      @zombiehalo9588 2 роки тому +13

      @@mattymerr701 pretty much

    • @peterclarke7240
      @peterclarke7240 2 роки тому +38

      I like to believe he just said that so Ashens wouldn't put any more suspicious food items in front of him. 😂

    • @zombiehalo9588
      @zombiehalo9588 2 роки тому +1

      @@peterclarke7240 maybe

  • @DellVanity
    @DellVanity 8 років тому +452

    My dog farted at the exact moment the omelette hit the plate and I thought I was going to be crazy for a second.

  • @buckfusters
    @buckfusters 8 років тому +1260

    Dan could have his own channel, where he just dry heaves at stuff.

  • @gorebrush
    @gorebrush 9 років тому +399

    D- *gagging*
    S- "So you like it, then?"
    D- *gagging*
    It's channels like this that make me glad to be alive. Many thanks.

  • @gmann215
    @gmann215 9 років тому +201

    "Try it! You'll like it!" sounds like something your parents would say to get you to eat something that you probably wouldn't like.

    • @wolfyboy
      @wolfyboy 9 років тому +8

      +gmann215 something they they know you MOST CERTAINLY won't like! XD lol

    • @Nails_By_Kimberlee
      @Nails_By_Kimberlee 4 роки тому

      Wasn't that the major line in Life cereal commercials back in the 80's?

    • @djsavix7019
      @djsavix7019 4 роки тому

      Those hormel breakfast bowls are actualy tasty despite the gross look

  • @MiaowGaiGar
    @MiaowGaiGar 8 років тому +321

    Wow, that Hormel meal doesn't fuck around. It just comes right out and says there's 160% of your daily cholesterol intake, right there, in that box. No allusions to multiple servings and pretending it's your fault if you ate the relatively small thing in its entirety, just "This is an unending storm of cholesterol. Get ready."
    Should have a list of fuckin' cardiologists printed on there.

    • @ppman123123
      @ppman123123 8 років тому +9

      eggs are naturally high in cholesterol. 2 eggs are easily above the daily recommended amount of cholesterol.

    • @MiaowGaiGar
      @MiaowGaiGar 8 років тому +32

      Well again, a lot of products bullshit you about serving sizes and such to make the numbers on the box less horrifying, so it's unusual to see something just say to hell with it.

    • @Calvin_Coolage
      @Calvin_Coolage 8 років тому

      Christ alive, you could eat one of those in the morning, and be full for the whole day.

    • @woop6727
      @woop6727 8 років тому +6

      the worst part is, they recommend you to "start the day!" and tell you that it's satisfying and you should take it everyday.
      they're straight up trying to give heart attacks to people who don't read the box.

    • @MiaowGaiGar
      @MiaowGaiGar 8 років тому +3

      Okay, now we're gettin' a little crazy.

  • @FfarquharEngine
    @FfarquharEngine 9 років тому +538

    Maybe Ashens has several brown couches in his garage and he has to swap them every time he does a food special.

    • @JackAldred
      @JackAldred 9 років тому +57

      I heard he's a brown sofa dealer, but keep it on the low low...

    • @FfarquharEngine
      @FfarquharEngine 9 років тому +4

      will do

    • @Minibac
      @Minibac 8 років тому +13

      *puts on tin foil hat*

    • @nicholsjoshua15
      @nicholsjoshua15 8 років тому +87

      The sofa was white when it was new.

    • @spoodermilk7692
      @spoodermilk7692 8 років тому +2

      +Joshua lol

  • @koenvandamme6901
    @koenvandamme6901 8 років тому +176

    Dan suffering in the background always cracks me up. The sound he produces is not unlike the one made by people who are about to die.

    • @Ben-hv8xi
      @Ben-hv8xi 8 років тому

      if you go to 4:44 he Ashens tells him to fake a reaction

    • @Ben-hv8xi
      @Ben-hv8xi 8 років тому

      Fuck off, no one asked for your opinion. I was just pointing somthing out.

    • @Ben-hv8xi
      @Ben-hv8xi 8 років тому

      +Julia Zawadzka your just discusting

    • @---Blue
      @---Blue 8 років тому +2

      Deez Nutz You're just illiterate.

    • @qwertykeyboard5901
      @qwertykeyboard5901 5 років тому +3

      @@Ben-hv8xi youtube comments bring the worst out of people

  • @scully1622
    @scully1622 8 років тому +527

    military rAshens

  • @MikeJeavons
    @MikeJeavons 9 років тому +1019

    You're welcome!

    • @daogenify
      @daogenify 9 років тому +14

      Hi Mike!

    • @queenoftheworld_
      @queenoftheworld_ 9 років тому +46

      Mike! On an Ashens video! *fangirl explosion*

    • @THE.RED.BEA3T
      @THE.RED.BEA3T 9 років тому +6

      I see your looking for inspiration on a ASHENS video.

    • @AmishParadise27
      @AmishParadise27 9 років тому +4

      No I'm not, I'm Tyler.

    • @shakyoregon2962
      @shakyoregon2962 9 років тому +10

      Just another cheap ashens knockoff only steadily growing bald.

  • @bumblebee__
    @bumblebee__ 8 років тому +479

    The omelette looks like a cross between a banana laffy taffy and a U.S. Military food ration

    • @wolfyboy
      @wolfyboy 8 років тому +6

      WHO TOLD YOU??!! THAT IS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION!! (shakes you like a british nanny)

    • @Waskomsause
      @Waskomsause 8 років тому +3

      Just never eat the rations that are omelette meals... Thats what they tell ya... And that LOOKS just like one someone slapped into a box.

    • @lucasbaxter2357
      @lucasbaxter2357 8 років тому

      Well omelettes aren't supplied in the U.S MREs, and they are actually quite nice.

    • @Hagrid216
      @Hagrid216 8 років тому +3

      +Lucas Baxter try british rations. you will knoe true pain after tex mex pasta

    • @bumblebee__
      @bumblebee__ 8 років тому

      +Matt Collyer Oh god I've heard the horror stories about those

  • @TheBrianJ
    @TheBrianJ 9 років тому +355

    People rag on Dan for dry heaving all the time, but let's be honest, Stuart doesn't bring him in for anything GOOD tasting.

    • @watchspotting
      @watchspotting 5 років тому +12

      But when does Stuart eat good things?

    • @sophiavechnyak6763
      @sophiavechnyak6763 4 роки тому +14

      @@watchspotting those international snacks are usually okay

    • @looksirdroids9134
      @looksirdroids9134 4 роки тому +8

      That's true but Dan is also a wuss.

    • @IvanovIvanAKrutoi
      @IvanovIvanAKrutoi 3 роки тому +8

      @@looksirdroids9134 Can you blame him though, for all the shit that Ashens made him eat?

  • @Optimalillusion
    @Optimalillusion 9 років тому +58

    I don't know what was funnier, the violated egg slab plopping out of the pouch, or the standard Dan reaction.

  • @NeoDragoN7676
    @NeoDragoN7676 8 років тому +1452

    Why does a pre-cooked omelette take 8 minutes to cook which is longer than actually cooking a real omelette.....

    • @Trivialise
      @Trivialise 8 років тому +118

      Because it's pre cooked.

    • @delamovies
      @delamovies 8 років тому +43

      +Trivialise that makes no sense

    • @dragonbutt
      @dragonbutt 8 років тому +152

      You're having to reheat it slowly because you dont want to actually cook it any more.

    • @dragonbutt
      @dragonbutt 8 років тому +20

      Actually, whenever i make a french rolled omlette i do it over low heat for like, ten minutes. You can always like, fry an omlette in less than 3 minutes or something but there are variations that take longer.

    • @kashinimeyo
      @kashinimeyo 8 років тому +3

      I assume it's from frozen on low

  • @jobuuumajors3542
    @jobuuumajors3542 8 років тому +331

    "Don't eat it Stuart. You're gonna get sick" Clearly Dan is new to this channel.

  • @TheJWHBShow
    @TheJWHBShow 9 років тому +84

    Best line is the very first omelette where Ashens gives Dan the bit and just as he's dying "so you liked it then?"

    • @Aetharn
      @Aetharn 6 років тому +7

      Nice profile pic dude

  • @Larry
    @Larry 9 років тому +302

    Not trying the wacky Easter eggs out in the UK this year? Like Marmite flavoured chocolate Easter eggs?
    I am disappoint.

    • @CrazyBlonde13
      @CrazyBlonde13 9 років тому

      D8 The horror...

    • @earo4040
      @earo4040 9 років тому +2

      Larry, I got an Oreo Easter egg. From Asda, I think

    • @DVGTS1
      @DVGTS1 9 років тому +10

      Marmite flavoured chocolate? dafuq is wrong with your country's food?

    • @ButtonMasherReal
      @ButtonMasherReal 9 років тому

      Syn ergy Nothin', it's just that the majority of this country likes Marmite and chocolate so why not both? Love it or hate it though.

    • @DVGTS1
      @DVGTS1 9 років тому +6

      ButtonMasher Because they don't mix. Just like mint and fish. Or peas on pizza. It's dreadful.

  • @FactionParadox2090
    @FactionParadox2090 8 років тому +346

    Dan: *opens the window and breathes* OH MY GOD *vomits and gags*

  • @CosmicKangaroo
    @CosmicKangaroo 9 років тому +321

    Ashens and Dan at a Restaurant
    Ashens: Hey Dan
    Dan: Yes Stuart
    Ashens: Want to try this steak dinner with onions?
    Dan: *Retches and Vomits all over the restaurant table*

    • @anormalchannel300
      @anormalchannel300 9 років тому +2

      Omfg too perfect xD

    • @ducis3446
      @ducis3446 9 років тому +9

      Someone give this man a medal.

    • @umbaupause
      @umbaupause 9 років тому +23

      To be honest... just what DOES Dan eat?! By now I worry he begins to choke when he senses anything that isn't water or air...

    • @GoEatATowel
      @GoEatATowel 9 років тому +31

      CosmicKoala Ashens: Hey Dan what's the tim-
      Dan: *Retches and projectile vomits all over the floor*

    • @Designathan
      @Designathan 9 років тому +11

      Ashens: Hey Dan I need help cleaning up your puke.
      Dan: *Retches and Vomits all over the floor*

  • @krs_lp7188
    @krs_lp7188 8 років тому +654

    Why do Ashens' food videos always make me hungry? This worries me greatly.

    • @JulianBo188
      @JulianBo188 8 років тому +9

      same

    • @TheGamingTraktor
      @TheGamingTraktor 8 років тому +8

      cuz it actually looks kinda yummy

    • @brb224
      @brb224 8 років тому +1

      hey if you want to eat this food i dont think he would be aposed to giving you the rest?

    • @TheGamingTraktor
      @TheGamingTraktor 8 років тому +2

      +brb224 Can I message him?

    • @brb224
      @brb224 8 років тому +1

      have fun

  • @hotelmario510
    @hotelmario510 2 роки тому +17

    Stuart: ooh that does smell a bit bad
    Dan: *ACK HOORRRK URRGGHHKKK*

  • @Mojobojo
    @Mojobojo 9 років тому +155

    Sulphite is bold because its an allergy from some people. Same reason Whole Egg is bold too. Although I would find it shocking if someone bought an omelet and didn't expect egg to be in it.

    • @Offensive_Username
      @Offensive_Username 9 років тому +9

      A grocery shop here sells milk cartons with the note "contains milk". This is just a precaution in case someone with an allergy would sue them.

    • @gimpedninja8448
      @gimpedninja8448 9 років тому

      It's the same people who sue because they didn't know coffee they dumped in their crotch was hot

    • @IamLiterallyRetarded
      @IamLiterallyRetarded 9 років тому +1

      Big Bob's Beepers HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA ROFL LOL L

    • @lunavixen015
      @lunavixen015 9 років тому +1

      Mojobojo Peanut butter also warns "contains nuts". It's mostly to protect against litigation, some people are also just really fucking stupid.

    • @sperrin
      @sperrin 9 років тому +2

      lunavixen015 it's actually because peanuts or not nuts.
      They are legumes and are from the same family as peas.
      But they have to have the "may contain nuts" warning as they are processed in the same factory as nuts despite the fact they are not nuts.

  • @YF501
    @YF501 8 років тому +190

    an excellent source of protein *chef excellence theme plays*

  • @UberMan5000
    @UberMan5000 9 років тому +44

    Hormel, the company that made those pre-packaged bacon and eggs, is also the company that manufactures Spam. Explains a lot, I feel.

  • @counternub40
    @counternub40 9 років тому +488

    One of my friends had that omelette thing on the Silver DofE expedition, long story short, we buried it.

    • @54321blader
      @54321blader 9 років тому +303

      The awful meal, or the friend?

    • @54321blader
      @54321blader 9 років тому +83

      ***** Bury the evidence at least 100 yards away from any water source, otherwise it can contaminate it. Remember kids, when you bury people, don't put them near water!

    • @isaiahdaniels5643
      @isaiahdaniels5643 9 років тому +23

      54321blader The more you know ~~~*

    • @MetalHermit83
      @MetalHermit83 9 років тому +13

      54321blader some people would recommend 200-300 yards,

    • @michaelparker2449
      @michaelparker2449 9 років тому +1

      It looks like the sort of food that if the Skynet robots dig it up in 1000 years to feed to the Zombies it'll probably look and taste the same.

  • @Mrguy5
    @Mrguy5 9 років тому +83

    Ashens: Look, its food
    Dan: *pukes*
    What the shit does the guy eat, that does not make him puke?

    • @Ashurman666
      @Ashurman666 9 років тому +26

      Once you eat a century egg nothing ever phases you again

    • @Beowulf31486
      @Beowulf31486 9 років тому +1

      *****
      Had one, it was edible....but I certainly would not go out of my way to eat another. Smoked eggs is something else I don't care for, but I would certainly go for them before eating another century egg.

    • @hashtonii
      @hashtonii 9 років тому +1

      Human flesh

    • @consolios
      @consolios 9 років тому +1

      Grain.

  • @Acebender
    @Acebender 9 років тому +36

    As a Spaniard, I'll say that's an insult to the glorious Spanish Omelette. I've never seen something looking less like a spanish omelette.

    • @LlamaFluff
      @LlamaFluff 9 років тому +8

      I know right, omelette are yellow with browny patches and stuff, and have the nice potato chunks. This looks like a haribo sweet

  • @ProtoMario
    @ProtoMario 9 років тому +70

    Of all the Army MRE's I had, I always, always refused the Omlet one.
    I'd rather go hungry.

    • @oCMSo
      @oCMSo 9 років тому +2

      i refused them all and i was the damn cook..... on the bright side the beagle liked the stew

    • @TimTomJimJom
      @TimTomJimJom 9 років тому +3

      Ayoooo proto! Surprised seeing you here!

    • @lunabolt
      @lunabolt 9 років тому +3

      ProtoMario my mother brought home MRE's one day...they were amazing but, im not hard to please when it comes to food.

    • @oCMSo
      @oCMSo 9 років тому +1

      Nathan Clark some are good, most, especially in the army are the cheapest in the barrel

    • @lunabolt
      @lunabolt 9 років тому

      she brought them home occasionally (she was in the military so she got them for free)...i would eat again (7.5 / 10)

  • @coffeevie
    @coffeevie 9 років тому +14

    "can be consumed cold if desired" is probably the most depressing thing I've seen from any Ashens video

  • @joshhooke8834
    @joshhooke8834 8 років тому +321

    Dan is the kind of guy to gag at air

    • @asbestosfibers1325
      @asbestosfibers1325 5 років тому

      @@Mr_Jack_Shelby vile and painful are 2 completely different things.....

    • @Dogy0909
      @Dogy0909 5 років тому +7

      Drowns In Kool Aid I’m assuming you’re a man? Y’all so weird, who cares what people get sick at fr, we get it you’re manly and don’t do womanly things like gagging 😆

    • @papayer
      @papayer 4 роки тому +13

      @@Dogy0909 ... what the fuck are you talking about?

    • @markmcpheters
      @markmcpheters 2 роки тому

      except hormel eggs and potatoes

  • @Razzlewolfflight
    @Razzlewolfflight 9 років тому +234

    One food you should only *ever* eat fresh, is *eggs.*

    • @DarkdustDragon
      @DarkdustDragon 9 років тому +35

      Razzlewolfflight Also, milk and cream, both of which are sometimes found in omelettes.

    • @kastroverde95
      @kastroverde95 9 років тому +2

      The spanish omelette consists on a potato and egg basis, and is often sold pre-cooked (obviously not a great choice). Im pretty sure it can last a couple weeks if well conserved

    • @DarkdustDragon
      @DarkdustDragon 9 років тому +9

      Jaime Rodriguez Anything with an egg base still needs to be kept cold, either in a fridge or freezer. I feel that condition may not have been met.

    • @jackoghost
      @jackoghost 9 років тому +17

      Razzlewolfflight sushi is quite high on that list too

    • @samward3895
      @samward3895 9 років тому +4

      DarkdustDragon There are different preservation conditions towards eggs depending where in the world you live. In America, keeping eggs chilled is 100% necessary however in the United Kingdom, eggs are preserved fine in room temperature.

  • @FireCalvinMaster
    @FireCalvinMaster 9 років тому +390

    An EGGselent video.

    • @ThePhotory
      @ThePhotory 9 років тому +48

      maxima nig thats a bit eggcessive

    • @jeremyallen5632
      @jeremyallen5632 9 років тому

      Braingears excellent*

    • @EvanescentGames
      @EvanescentGames 9 років тому +1

      Braingears The second meal is an eggcelent source of protein

    • @GeronKizan
      @GeronKizan 9 років тому +2

      Braingears Why are we egging them on?

    • @mcFreaki
      @mcFreaki 9 років тому +1

      because it's eggsactly what the world needs at this point

  • @cloudsofuncertainty
    @cloudsofuncertainty 9 років тому +21

    I love how Dan sees the Hormel one and laughs in insanity.

  • @Levi_Skardsen
    @Levi_Skardsen 9 років тому +755

    How lazy do you have to be to buy this? Omelette has got to be one of the easiest, quickest things to cook next to toast.

    • @stephenhelyer
      @stephenhelyer 9 років тому +44

      It's a Spanish Omelette. Learn the difference

    • @anelperezic2383
      @anelperezic2383 9 років тому +47

      +El Stevo add some potatoes takes 5 mins if you go supersonic

    • @louiswhellans6545
      @louiswhellans6545 9 років тому +11

      a bread sandwich

    • @Levi_Skardsen
      @Levi_Skardsen 9 років тому +25

      El Stevo Did I do or say anything to indicate I don't know the difference?

    • @mrbear8977
      @mrbear8977 9 років тому +8

      I don't know how to make an omelette :(

  • @GraemePryce1978
    @GraemePryce1978 9 років тому +80

    'Sulphite' is in bold because it is an allergy ingredient. If you look at the ingredients on things, usually anything like nuts, milk, salt, gluten etc will be in bold for that reason.

    • @rockyryan2805
      @rockyryan2805 9 років тому +2

      +Graeme Pryce thanks for pointing that out, I was a bit confused by the way they had bolded that

    • @charlie_mario6292
      @charlie_mario6292 6 років тому +2

      You can’t be allergic to salt you need sodium to survive

    • @FlatBroke612
      @FlatBroke612 5 років тому

      WalnutTime DONT TELL ME WHAT IM ALLERGIC TOO!!!! PATRIARCHY!!!!! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

    • @velazquezarmouries
      @velazquezarmouries 5 років тому

      Also metasulphide stops the spread of bacteria it is used for normalizing wine

  • @RCT3Crashes100
    @RCT3Crashes100 7 років тому +22

    Ashens: "Hey Dan!"
    Dan: *[RETCHING NOISES]*
    Ashens: "You're breathing."
    Dan: *[RETCHING NOISES]*

  • @gold_lightning
    @gold_lightning 9 років тому +24

    If there was an April Fools joke saying you died of food poisoning, I would've believed it.

  • @ferociousgumby
    @ferociousgumby 4 роки тому +9

    Any egg dish that "requires no refrigeration" makes a shiver run through me.

  • @benhaggerty8707
    @benhaggerty8707 8 років тому +157

    Why the fuck does it look like a massive piece of ravioli

    • @redtiny802
      @redtiny802 8 років тому +7

      An actual mini-roll mutant ravioli from the planet pasta

    • @scully1622
      @scully1622 8 років тому +3

      redtiny802 all hail the flying spaghetti monster

    • @KhanggiTanka
      @KhanggiTanka 8 років тому +3

      hahahaha what kind of hellish ravioli looks like that?

    • @ashguy6
      @ashguy6 7 років тому +11

      If you find dead loli in your omelet then you have might have more of a problem then rancid egg.

  • @sarmin8008
    @sarmin8008 8 років тому +77

    "That absolutely reeks of my god"
    I guess God really is dead after all.

    • @anthonyinteresting4736
      @anthonyinteresting4736 5 років тому +2

      .... and no one cares... if there is a hell... I'll see you there 🤘🤘🤘

    • @anthonyinteresting4736
      @anthonyinteresting4736 5 років тому +2

      Also we're the ones who killed him. Look how edgy I am... quoting Nietzche and Nine Inch Nails n shit... 🤣🤣🤣

    • @Viridi_cen_Faba
      @Viridi_cen_Faba 5 років тому +1

      Anthony Interesting tf dude

  • @GorlWorldComments
    @GorlWorldComments 6 місяців тому +5

    i miss the food specials so i have to rewatch them in 2024

    • @samholdsworth420
      @samholdsworth420 3 місяці тому +2

      Gang gang!
      Stuart is making a new movie...so He's been absent from UA-cam 😢

  • @kahjunn9427
    @kahjunn9427 5 років тому +13

    Alternate title: Attempting to assassinate Dan with eggs

  • @VermilionRua
    @VermilionRua 9 років тому +241

    Hormel Compleats are usually alright, but prepackaged egg meal... things... are flavorless trash always from my experience.

    • @Xaplelul
      @Xaplelul 9 років тому +20

      "Hormel Compleats are usually alright"... Ugh the poor are so disgusting.

    • @Exarian
      @Exarian 9 років тому +22

      That Blind Guy eh, it's what I call a functional meal. If I'm low on time and have nothing better to fix it's not really bad. Just completely forgettable, but I mean fuck, who actually has good food for every meal of the day unless they're rich?

    • @VermilionRua
      @VermilionRua 9 років тому +22

      Exarian My thoughts exactly. I can enjoy (or loathe) a $30 steak as much as I can enjoy a $2 pre-made meal. Price tag is meaningless to me. If it tastes good or is at least inoffensive, I'll eat it.

    • @alechuntsman9524
      @alechuntsman9524 9 років тому +5

      That Blind Guy Hormel also has god like pre-packaged peperoni

    • @VermilionRua
      @VermilionRua 9 років тому +6

      BUDDER SAUCE They're pretty good all around, imo. On the subject of the Compleats, their chicken and rice (last time I had it anyway) is fucking delicious.

  • @soullessSiIence
    @soullessSiIence 5 років тому +9

    I've been watching these videos for like 7 years now. I feel like it's an essencial part of my lonely life.

    • @hexyko4850
      @hexyko4850 5 років тому +1

      Same but I started watching not long ago after years of avoiding UA-cam channels.
      Ashens is like a friend.

  • @thekillerdynamo
    @thekillerdynamo Рік тому +3

    I am glad you did not say “This is Sparta egg”, Stuart

  • @yaawg
    @yaawg 9 років тому +47

    Pls make a series named "Ashens' rations"

  • @MrGlenbw
    @MrGlenbw 8 років тому +8

    7:25 - It looks like as if some prankster decides to put baby poop inside the package as an April Fool's joke.

  • @Goodish_night
    @Goodish_night 8 років тому +2

    "Salty Nothingness" is the name of my new theoretical indy band

  • @ericf112
    @ericf112 2 роки тому +8

    Dan won't survive the apocalypse. I give him 10 hours max

  • @netskaiper2
    @netskaiper2 8 років тому +15

    *Dan gags viciously* Ashens: So you like it then?

  • @MrVirobot
    @MrVirobot 9 років тому +153

    Says Hormel breakfast thing is from America. Cholesterol is 160% of daily recommended value. Confirmed from America.

    • @samljer
      @samljer 8 років тому +7

      +MrVirobot that, and the quality of the ingredients is trash.
      Do you see the damn potato. erg

    • @katuroo
      @katuroo 8 років тому +6

      +MrVirobot had to look that up because I don't believe anybody - you're correct!

    • @nobel11
      @nobel11 8 років тому +11

      As an American, I can confirm these are from America, and that they taste of salty bile.

    • @patrickharris8180
      @patrickharris8180 8 років тому +1

      What nationality are you?

    • @patrickharris8180
      @patrickharris8180 8 років тому +1

      What nationality are you samljer?

  • @mang232
    @mang232 9 років тому +150

    Why does everyone hate the other people that sometimes are in ashens videos?

    • @PeTecko
      @PeTecko 9 років тому +50

      Barry is amazing!

    • @SexualizingTheHolocaust
      @SexualizingTheHolocaust 9 років тому

      Petr Říha Barry?

    • @CosylandWhispers
      @CosylandWhispers 9 років тому +25

      Petr Říha Yeah, Barry and Dan are both really funny

    • @KernelLeak
      @KernelLeak 9 років тому +2

      LOVEWhispersUK So are Ashens and Damien Slash... (aka the "Ideas Men")

    • @CosylandWhispers
      @CosylandWhispers 9 років тому +2

      Leak Yeah, Ideas men is hilarious!!! They have really good comedic chemistry :)

  • @HashiNuke
    @HashiNuke 2 роки тому +3

    Dan: *dies from gagging*
    Stuart: So you liked it then?

  • @mauriceschmidt24
    @mauriceschmidt24 8 років тому +15

    7:20 This Egg looks like Satan puked after partying too much.

  • @CertiBen
    @CertiBen 7 років тому +11

    Ashens: "Try Some"
    Dan: "Do I have to?"
    Ashens: "Yes, yes you do"
    A great friendship has been ruined

  • @independentpuppy7520
    @independentpuppy7520 8 років тому +9

    Dan makes me laugh when I hear him laughing.

  • @compactc9
    @compactc9 8 років тому +12

    I loved the ominous 'PLOP' the omelet made as it hit the plate!

  • @mileyrocks852
    @mileyrocks852 9 років тому +3

    "The audience wants you to"
    I literally always love Dan's reactions XD

  • @pashow6486
    @pashow6486 9 років тому +30

    If you don't like Dan direct your mouse over to the top right corner and close the window

    • @DarkWolf00100
      @DarkWolf00100 9 років тому +16

      But... But... I'm on a mac.
      (I would never use a mac as I hate them but you get the joke)

    • @ekmad
      @ekmad 9 років тому +6

      But Ashens....

    • @Mudux
      @Mudux 9 років тому +7

      Pashow but... but... what about my other tabs?

    • @Adahop
      @Adahop 9 років тому

      _DarkWolf_ I was going to say that, but for real! (I'm only on it because II'm at work. I hate these things.)

    • @BenjaminGoose
      @BenjaminGoose 9 років тому +3

      But... buuut... what will I have to complain about?

  • @alexpinkstone5639
    @alexpinkstone5639 4 роки тому +4

    9:03 - "Bad Spud."
    *Instant Bob The Builder flashbacks*

  • @Vollification
    @Vollification 5 років тому +8

    1:08
    A spanish omelet is supposed to be round because you make it in a fucking frying pan!
    That is square! Why?
    6:09
    Yeah, if they say that...
    9:45
    That's basically what all these microwaved singleportion stuff is. "Bachelor chow", they don't exist because of laziness or convinience, they exist because of incompetence.

  • @Nettacki
    @Nettacki 9 років тому +72

    6:54
    holy crap look at that cholesterol level.

    • @ethanfleming7821
      @ethanfleming7821 8 років тому +18

      XD 160% of your daily cholesterol intake

    • @Trivialise
      @Trivialise 8 років тому +14

      Holy fuck. That thing will stop your heart in an instant.

    • @thekungachunga4578
      @thekungachunga4578 8 років тому +19

      +Trivialise Unless of course you live in America, then this is just an afternoon snack comparatively.

    • @thekungachunga4578
      @thekungachunga4578 8 років тому +1

      Win_M27 Umm... Why exactly?

    • @Trivialise
      @Trivialise 8 років тому

      ThatEmoGamer Because he's an obnoxious, edgy internet kid.

  • @msia7201
    @msia7201 2 роки тому +4

    1:50 ingredients in bold are things people are commonly allergic to. Eggs is bolded as well.

  • @rarelycomments
    @rarelycomments 9 років тому +14

    From Wikipedia: When mixed with water, sodium metabisulfite releases sulfur dioxide (SO2), a pungent, unpleasant smelling gas that can also cause breathing difficulties in some people.
    :D

    • @tujiongyhrd
      @tujiongyhrd 9 років тому

      Thanks for sharing :) I was going to google that.

  • @tdcrenegade8687
    @tdcrenegade8687 3 роки тому +3

    been laughing at that dry ass ending for years now

  • @BadgerFiresFoam
    @BadgerFiresFoam 4 роки тому +2

    Stuart: thinks of dan
    Dan: violently projectile vomits

    • @robosing225
      @robosing225 4 роки тому

      Did you notice at 4:45 he spoke to dan off camera telling him to pretend. Do you think that was supposed to be edited out and dan i fact, fakes his wretching?

  • @shiawasekappukekiful
    @shiawasekappukekiful 8 років тому +16

    "When I was a boy I ate 4 dozen eggs every morning to keep myself strong"
    -no one gets heart disease like Gaston

  • @JustSomeLeagueClips
    @JustSomeLeagueClips 9 років тому +19

    Okay guys. Pause the video and go to 9:59. Then use your arrowkeys to watch that potato slide down.
    Yummy.

  • @nilsnyman6767
    @nilsnyman6767 Рік тому +2

    I like Ashens enough to be watching videos as old as 10+ years lolz

  • @markiangooley
    @markiangooley 8 років тому +10

    Some people are sensitive to sulphites/sulfites and so it's bolded as a very very slight warning. Most wine is treated with them and those people can't safely drink it. That treatment has been done for centuries, long before people knew much about the chemistry.

  • @snapitzash
    @snapitzash 9 років тому +6

    Dan's laugh is so😍
    Actually, I don't understand why everyone hates Dan, I think he's brilliant.

    • @Totallynotkyubey
      @Totallynotkyubey 9 років тому +2

      +holliehasnoidea He overreacts ALL the time. It really gets old after the first two times.

    • @MrJoeyWheeler
      @MrJoeyWheeler 9 років тому +1

      It's not a matter of overreacting. he's reacting like a normal person would. Don't forget Stuart has years of experience with bad crap.

    • @Totallynotkyubey
      @Totallynotkyubey 9 років тому +1

      Damian Freeman
      as a relatively normal person with little experience with disgusting food, i can tell you that I wouldn't be retching like a sick donkey.

    • @MrJoeyWheeler
      @MrJoeyWheeler 9 років тому

      Totallynotkyubey Perhaps not but I know I probably would. As I've mentioned elsewhere, I can end up retching just from the smell of cat food (or more usually, mashing it up).

  • @aidangarvey7049
    @aidangarvey7049 7 років тому +1

    I've watched this video in 2015, 2016 and 2017 and every time I come here the Dan jokes have escalated. 10/10 will come here every year for the rest of my life.

  • @neptunenx01
    @neptunenx01 4 роки тому +5

    Dan needs an award for his over acting with the omlette 👍

  • @liamburns07
    @liamburns07 9 років тому +21

    Great editing!

    • @oliverjustdeblesser8706
      @oliverjustdeblesser8706 9 років тому

      Big Bob's Beepers bob im gonna sub to you just because ive seen you comment in ashens vids all the time

    • @Magikpotion
      @Magikpotion 9 років тому +1

      ***** He forgot to edit at 4:45, I wonder if they ever eat the stuff they show, probably not.

    • @oliie8087
      @oliie8087 9 років тому +4

      Magikpotion I'm 100000000% sure that was just a joke.

    • @Magikpotion
      @Magikpotion 9 років тому

      Oliver Oliver What makes you so certain? I'd like to indulge in that sense of humor, but it didn't seem intentional. I'm not going to be a worrywart about it, just saying.
      I need to brighten up.

    • @xvalley8512
      @xvalley8512 9 років тому +2

      Magikpotion They already established that it was a joke over on the Ashens subreddit.

  • @pauldog
    @pauldog 5 років тому +6

    Nobody:
    Dan: *violently vomits*

  • @cBearTV-
    @cBearTV- 4 роки тому +4

    Dan : "Do I have to?"
    Ashens : " YES" 🤣🤣

    • @zzoinks
      @zzoinks 4 роки тому +1

      that's what every kid says when mom says " eat your vegetables" 😂

  • @neroneroren6788
    @neroneroren6788 9 років тому +55

    Have you voted Ashens for Smash yet?

    • @jade34503
      @jade34503 9 років тому +4

      Vero NeroreN What is Smash?

    • @somegreenguy
      @somegreenguy 9 років тому +2

      Vero NeroreN He would use tat to attack

    • @georgebamber6871
      @georgebamber6871 9 років тому +1

      *sign* smash is a thing from the 70 s that is a weird thing you mix with water and makes a thing like mash

    • @jade34503
      @jade34503 9 років тому

      George bamber lol

    • @AndyStriker13LP
      @AndyStriker13LP 9 років тому +1

      Jade Greenwood Super Smash Bros. (a video game)

  • @youtubeaccount2146
    @youtubeaccount2146 8 років тому +19

    *audible choking, gagging*
    "So you liked it, then?"

  • @33melonpaws77
    @33melonpaws77 8 років тому +78

    I know what this is good for! Throw a packet at the kidnapped person in your basement. "Here are your rations." *toss* "You shall eat them COLD." Grin as they sob in despair.

    • @wittster1
      @wittster1 8 років тому +17

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA That was so funny I almost fell off my dinosaur.

    • @MinoriGaming
      @MinoriGaming 8 років тому +15

      ... I have no comment.... How high were you two writing this?

    • @woolenhat5796
      @woolenhat5796 8 років тому +1

      33melonpaws77 no ventilation in the basement. even more despair

    • @iclimbeverything2990
      @iclimbeverything2990 8 років тому +2

      woollen hat basement is made of forks and Spanish omellete after 4 months

    • @hayfajbiri7665
      @hayfajbiri7665 6 років тому +2

      Not all of us have a kidnapped person in our basement

  • @probablyrajir638
    @probablyrajir638 8 років тому +9

    "Tasteless with a horrible aftertaste of egginess" Sadly, I know that taste, at work, they make scramble using some kind of liquid egg thing and this sentence describes that horror perfectly.

  • @phantomconsular6852
    @phantomconsular6852 4 роки тому +2

    The British invaded half the word for their spices and then decided they didn’t like any of them

  • @dickbutthebuttdick9876
    @dickbutthebuttdick9876 9 років тому +26

    I remember the great egg war in vieggnam

  • @zitzle
    @zitzle 8 років тому +71

    I once got Indian food in a "ready-to-eat" package. And it was a horrible mistake.

    • @VectorCultistCaptainVector
      @VectorCultistCaptainVector 8 років тому +12

      Your ass didn't survive it?

    • @pizzarayy
      @pizzarayy 8 років тому +6

      All ready to eat meals are horrible

    • @michaciozda7463
      @michaciozda7463 8 років тому +3

      Poslish Army MRE's are actually not bad ;-;

    • @dragonbutt
      @dragonbutt 8 років тому +3

      American ones arent bad. Just kinda bland and generic tasting.
      It tastes like it was designed. To fit a budget >>

    • @Hagrid216
      @Hagrid216 8 років тому

      +Dragon Butt (ThatsNoMoon) meanwhile im pretty sure british ones are designed to kill soldiers XD

  • @werter876
    @werter876 7 років тому

    Ashens: *exists*
    Dan: *throws up violently*

  • @vampiress13ouran
    @vampiress13ouran 9 років тому +21

    I find Dan to be wonderful. You'd think after ages, I'd be okay to come back and enjoy it. But nope, people still whine about him in the comments. Honestly.

    • @vampiress13ouran
      @vampiress13ouran 9 років тому +6

      Then don't watch the episodes he's in? It's that easy, sir.

    • @wolfyboy
      @wolfyboy 9 років тому +1

      +Beka Strife but that gives us LESS episodes to watch! so it's better to complain, so that ashens might STOP adding him in, and we can watch ALL the episodes, without any trouble!

    • @vampiress13ouran
      @vampiress13ouran 9 років тому +10

      I don't find him that bad. Ever seen Good Mythical Morning? Link suffers from a weak stomach as well and no one bitches this much about him.

  • @SonnytheArcticFox
    @SonnytheArcticFox 9 років тому +5

    ''It absolutely wreaks of- *My god*''

  • @francesknop7856
    @francesknop7856 7 років тому +1

    The omelette looks like something the sims would eat

  • @dojix96
    @dojix96 9 років тому +6

    I'm fine with Dan, I just can't stand him coughing and dying. Reminds me of the retching noise Alex makes in A Clockwork Orange, makes me feel sick.

  • @vampiress13ouran
    @vampiress13ouran 9 років тому +4

    I adore Dan. I love how Ashens includes him in videos still even as his fans bash the poor guy to hell. If you don't like Dan, don't watch the video. ^^ simple advice.

  • @lewisbrockchannel
    @lewisbrockchannel 9 років тому +2

    Both of their laughs are hilarious :D

  • @PhilXavierSierraJones
    @PhilXavierSierraJones 5 років тому +5

    "I'VE BEEN FOUND OUT! THIS VIDEO IS OVER!"
    - Ashens

  • @STDrepository
    @STDrepository 8 років тому +17

    As an American I always get super nervous when he brings out the American foods. I've eaten these Hormel meals before and they are not bad. Oh well at least we still have the victory from the 20 year old fruit snacks episode. Our way out of date fruit snacks were actually edible unlike the British brand.

    • @michaelhall736
      @michaelhall736 8 років тому +3

      STDrepository I actually love Harmel food bowls. I had this chicken and rice one. It was really good.

    • @harutothefriendlyodst7639
      @harutothefriendlyodst7639 5 років тому +1

      Yeah none of these are as bad as they say really.
      It's just pretty bad for their tastes over there or atleast different from what they are used to

    • @nathanmccormack4681
      @nathanmccormack4681 2 роки тому +1

      Pretty sure that's because as a general rule the other side of the world to America tends to enjoy real food more than whatever come in those ready meal packs

    • @sauwensvk7589
      @sauwensvk7589 2 місяці тому

      I mean you're noth wrong... we're not used to copious amounts of salt, cholesterol and corn syrup​@@harutothefriendlyodst7639

  • @kathydina3646
    @kathydina3646 4 роки тому

    No one's going to see this, but I wanted to say that this video is a classic that I return to almost every year. Fun stuff.

  • @thekweewee
    @thekweewee 9 років тому +2

    I just spent a minute of my life staring at an empty plate

  • @TheLadyLiddell
    @TheLadyLiddell 9 років тому +128

    Why does everybody hate Dan?

    • @angreydoggo4357
      @angreydoggo4357 9 років тому +29

      MaxTheKanuck #JoinTheMasterRace And he is in the vast majority of Ashens videos as of late.

    • @Rakshasa1986
      @Rakshasa1986 9 років тому +72

      I like Dan. I think of him as a talking kitty kat who always vomits.

    • @vaya-dragon1998
      @vaya-dragon1998 9 років тому +19

      Dan is not that bad

    • @BenjaminGoose
      @BenjaminGoose 9 років тому +36

      They don't, they are just jealous that he gets to be in a video with Ashens whereas they have to stay at home getting beaten by their parents. :)

    • @thomasjenkins7506
      @thomasjenkins7506 9 років тому +6

      Evan Jones
      really? the vast majority? or is it just the old cake (4 months ago) and the bean one on his other channel?

  • @msia7201
    @msia7201 4 роки тому +2

    2:18 "That retort pouch just gave birth!"

  • @smartkidado
    @smartkidado 9 років тому +13

    I can smell the omelet through the wifi.