The Most Disastrous Examples of Unintended Consequence
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- Опубліковано 15 чер 2024
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When is the next live?
Hi Fact Boi was that HMS Bristol you used to stay on???
I vote we all just use diapers,and then drive the price down due to its essential necessity status.
I love my sheath undies! But I want you to start a channel that you build Legos and rant the whole time. I wanted to say allegedly but I'm not clever enough to fit it in. Someone else can if they feel inclined. Tangent and Lego time.
(About that "the hole in the ozone layer is healing" thing: not as much as it is meant to be, considering that in China CFCs have been quietly being used again by their companies to cut costs)
"Dave is fully blind" *shows Dave a picture of the Walkie Talkie* 😵💫
Why does Dave even have a light on in his room? 🤔
Daves reply ...That is the shard you hired me so yeah to me that is the shard
Ha ha ha ha ha
@@MAGGOT_VOMIT For a lot of even fully blind people, differences in light is one of the things they can still make out
Thank you!!!
There was a 'stranger danger' campaign in my school with visitors from the police. It was all very well planned out except for the part where they didn't define what the word 'stranger' actually meant. My 5-year-old kiddy brain decided it meant some sort of big monster. This, of course, rendered their entire message useless in my case.
A few weeks later I met a police lady while out with my Mum. The police officer asked me if I knew what her baton was for. I smiled sweetly and replied "for killing strangers".
I mean...
You were right
@@thewhitefalcon8539 Well, sort of... They just hurt people with those sticks, not kill them. That's what their guns are for.
My grandfather died of smoking related diseases, very slowly and horribly, so my parents were very anti-smoking and started enforcing that lesson when I was very young. This was back in the eighties when smoking was still permitted on public transport. I was small for my age and my mum loved to dress me up in pretty dresses like a doll. I went up to a guy smoking on the tram, stared at him for a while and then like a kid straight out of a horror movie told him, with all the seriousness a two year old could muster, “you’re going to die”. My mum ran up and apologised, “I’m so sorry, we’ve been talking about smoking,” and dragged me off. I like to think he quit that day.
A more personal touch than a couple of warning shots in the back.
As for “Stranger Danger”: My uncle has been involved as a K9 handler for search and rescue groups and knows a bunch of other people in that field. They have several stories of children who took much longer to be found than they should have because not only did they not approach someone for help, but they *actively hid* from the search crews of “strangers” going by. Without the dogs they may never have been found.
I’ve had my kid almost get me destroyed in public before. Years ago when my kid was 2, I was with her and my wife (who was pregnant with our second) in a store, and I had the great idea of giving my wife time to wander the shop on her own and not deal with a clingy toddler. As soon as my wife was out of sight our kid started freaking out and screamed at the top of her lungs, “help, help, I can’t breathe. I’m dying.” Dudes in the store came running ready to save a child and found an exasperated dad with a kid strapped in a shopping carts freaking out. Thankfully the guys recognized what was going on and didn’t just start swinging. However, I’m still appreciative to this day that there were people willing to jump into potential danger and weren’t going to ignore my kid screaming. I almost got my s**t kicked in, but I wasn’t even mad about it.
I loved the edited intro. Simon absolutely has the best writing and editing team on UA-cam. The presenter is good to but the team behind the camera are absolutely great.
He's basically the natural fool who dances and stumbles around for our amusement while the folks behind the scenes pull the strings. If it were just Simon, this channel would be the ramblings of a crazy person. 😂
Agreed
@@Nylak-Otter You mean to say it's not? Did we just watch the same video where the Boi did a tangent instead of an intro? 😂
@@Narangarath Yes, but imagine if they weren't there. It would be completely incomprehensible jibberish. 😂
I was literally typing that idea as a suggestion. Like "Hey, Sam should have done an edited together Intro. WoUld be perfect" but as i'm typing I saw he did exactly that. Genius. Love this channel dude.
Sam Bankman-Fried sentenced to 25 years in prison. Congrats Simon on winning the bet.
We all essentially put a parlay on that one. If he didn't then we'd know something was up.
I mean, he stole from rich people so he was obviously going to get a heavy punishment
@@eddythefoolThe bet was guessing how many years he would get , Simon guessed the closes. No one was doubting it wouldnt be a heavy sentence.
I believe Simon also mentioned the sentence will most likely be 25 years but he'll probably get out in like 18 with good behavior or something.
@@eddythefoolYep. Stealing from poor people? That's just good business. Steal from the rich? "YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL FOR LIFE MOTHER FUCKER!"
As an adult, I figured out to be very careful about helping a lost toddler. Engage with the lost child, don't move, ask other people to send police. Mom shows up, the kid is suddenly happy. Anyone tries to take the kid without engagement from the child gets challenged by me.
24:49 Google agrees with dave! 300,000 diapers are thrown away globally every minute.
ChatGpt told me 365,000
Was about to this. Lol. Thanks!
chat gpt just told me there are none, because it can't connect. lol
Google is way easier and much more reliable at the moment.
Makes sense, just based on a "back of the envelope" calculation.
Lets assume a 7 billion population equates to 100 million children of nappy-wearing age (an underestimate). If they all wore disposable nappies (thank goodness they don't, so this will be an overestimate), and needed 4 nappies a day (an underestimate based on our experience), that's 400 million nappies a day. Or around 280,000 per minute.
But a better way to estimate the number disposed of is to find out how many are manufactured. Because they will pretty much *all* be thrown away.
What a waste. We cared enough about the environment to buy a rock-solid washing machine and wash a LOT of reusable nappies while our pair were growing up.
I love how this has become Simon reacting to the script and the editor reaction to Simon. We just need Dave reacting to the video with the edits, and we'll be all set.
A blind man reaction video 😂
@Torsheir I didn't even think about that. Dave seems like he'd think that was hilarious.
@@mwolkove absolutely 🤣
As a girl growing up in the 80s, my grandma repeatedly told me to yell "FIRE, FIRE!!!" because everyone pays attention to fire, especially in Australia.
Also because no one comes if you yell “help” they are too worried about endangering themselves if you are being robbed, attacked etc.
Yup, also an Aussie. i got told as a teen girl that if I ever got raped to yell fire as people might ignore what they think is domestic violence but they wont ignore fire,
Also an Aussie, grew up through the early 2000s and this is what I was also taught
A sad indictment on society really...
If you're in the USA -- do not do this. Specifically because people "won't ignore fire," yelling fire when there is none can be prosecuted as a criminal offense.
Whoever edited this episode.
You are a FUCKING LEGEND!
Simon "A mate of mine and I had kids at the same time"
20th century Fox intro "No one cares"
I straight spit a mouthful of soda across the room, and lost it laughing my ass off!
Legendary epic addition
👍😆
Editor Julian Vu - you're completely on top of your game this video. From the missing intro to all the little touches like the headphones warning, phenomenal job!
According to wikipedia "An estimated 27.4 billion disposable diapers are used each year in the US", that works out to around 52 thousand per minute. That's only for the USA. So 300 thousand per minute worldwide sounds not only perfectly plausible, but possibly a little low.
Thank you!
Say 8 billion people in this world, say half of them under 30, say 2/30ths of them wear diapers, that's 266 million kids. They war 3 diapers per day so 800 million diapers a day. The day has 24*60=1440 minutes, so we're coming out at 555 thousand diapers a minute. The order of magnitude doesn't seem off.
That is a good thing as disposable diapers are an amazing thing.
🙃
@xrimn9294 okay, well not all cultures use disposables so you can't start at 8 billion. But if you think kids only have 3 changes per day then 😂😂😂😂 you don't have kids do you?!
Yep. Tell your kid to avoid strangers.
Our son was just starting school, so I went with him to the daycare where he would get picked up by the bus in the morning. We showed him the bus he would take to school and the driver that would be taking him.
A few days later, we get told that he is suspended from the bus for a week because he was causing trouble and refusing to get on the bus.
They gave us a written report and it was from a different driver and a bus other than the one our son was supposed to take.
Our response was, "That isn't even his bus."
Their response was, "We changed it."
"And you didn't tell anyone?"
He wouldn't get on because that wasn't the bus we told him to take. He was suspended for trying to do what we told him to do.
N they didn't fix the situation n apologize to you? That's weird.
Sounds about right. Don't tell anyone important. God forbid parents parent anymore.
Hope you gave your son an amazing week.
I would've done something... Probably extremely petty over something like that...
My local area decided (ignoring teachers, parents, etc) to make one elementary school down the street for 3rd to 5th graders and the one 5 miles away off a highway for kindergarten to 2nd graders... The school that is nearby is directly next to the middle school and high school...
So now parents will have to most likely drop off a high schooler/middle schooler/older elementary schooler and then drive through all the traffic out of town to get to the highway and then get another kid to THAT school...
So what do I do being a parent to a middle schooler, 1st grader and a small baby that tends to wake us up numerous times at night and THEN get up and take the kids to school in the am? Them kids are late to first period almost daily... And I'm just WAITING for a school official to try and talk to me about it
@@edenrose1224 they're school admin. They think they are above apologizing
Kid:"You're not my dad!"
Father: "if you can get You're mother to admit that, we can both avoid this!"
I love that damn Bee so friggin much! "Nooooo....."😍🤗
Same!! 😂😂😂I crack up every single time, and my daughters just shake their heads at me.
This man genuinely no longer gives a fuck anymore and it's hilarious. I'm literally crying with laughter.
It's wonderful isn't it 😂
This is what happens when you have shit tonnes of money. You stop caring about anything but yourself.
Word. Same here fren.
❤🎉
@@quirkyMakesI have 0 money's and I don't give a fuck about anybody but myself but go off
Not the impression I got@@quirkyMakes
Yeah so stranger danger is VERY FUCKING IMPORTANT with regards to how many kids have phones and social media. Stranger danger has evolved. 10yo pasting tiktoks need to be weary of DMs more than guys on the street
That's a VERY good point!
One of my daughter's Roblox friends asked her how old she is. She replied "I don't tell people on the internet how old I am". I was so proud! 😄
It's just as important as seriously screening what the children are doing online. If the parents aren't monitoring what's going on theyre setting their kids up for predators to potentially find them.
@@joelockard7174
You're absolutely right - and teaching kids about online safely is probably the more effective strategy of the two. Monitoring what your kid is doing online is ALSO important, but kids can be sneaky. Especially as they grow into teenagers. Also I try to make sure my kid is very comfortable coming to talk to me if something seems a little off or makes them uncomfortable.
When I was a kid I learned the consequences of eating a whole pound of chocolate meant sitting in the bathroom with intestinal cramps.
As for the invasive species, until very recently, humanity seems to have seperated the world according to the answers to a series of questions.
1. Can I eat it?
2. Will it eat me?
3. Will eating it kill me?
4. Will eating it make me wish I was dead?
5. Can I do something that looks cool with it to impress my friends?
16:41 "Uuuuhh You had another iPad, like.... right here."
So subtle! If I hadn't been looking at the screen at that exact moment, I would never have known. 😂😂
I was team "potty train before two" and then I had two kids, both severely disabled. You have no idea how glad I was that nappies went up to a size 6. My daughter was 6½ when she potty trained (I'd been working on it since she was 16 months) and my son was 4½ (working on it since he was 2½). A lot of people don't realize that some kids really don't potty train, and it's not laziness on the part of the parent. Mentally, my kids are still toddlers. The reason teachers are seeing a huge increase is partly because children like mine aren't being institutionalized anymore.
In the 80’s, two of my cousins who are severely disabled were born. There were diapers that went up larger than baby sizes. My aunts got them from their kids’ doctors. For free. Pampers isn’t to thank for your kids having larger diapers. Larger diapers were already around, and it was accepted that those who wore them likely had disabilities. What Pampers and other companies did was turn bigger kids being in diapers into jokes thanks to lazy parents. Your kids would have had an easier time before all of this. Realistically, most bigger kids who are in diapers are entirely able to be potty-trained, but have parents who believe the shit about how kids shouldn’t be potty-trained until they’re old enough to verbally express interest in it. And that stupidity reflects on you and your kids. Defending the lazy parents makes your life harder.
My oldest was well on his way to being toilet trained by 2.5 at the latest, then he managed to brake his leg. He quickly got himself toilet trained as soon as the cast was off. I had wanted to start even earlier than I did with him, but it had been winter and my mother said summer was the best season, because then they can just run around in only underwear. Reducing the laundry due to accidents.
I did the same sort of upbringing with my younger son, and he categorically refused to be toilet trained. When I seriously started, he demonstrated that he understood the concept by using the potty chair 100% the first day. Then proceeded to absolutely no success with it the next 7 days. Yeah, it was clearly deliberate, because if it weren't, you would expect to still have some success every day even if they were having trouble. Especially after such a good first day. So it was finding a way to motivate him. I tried everything, and was seriously thinking he wouldn't be at more than one point. Well, I'd been avoiding using food as a reward, because it can set up a really bad relationship with food in the future if you use it as a reward, but that was literally the only thing that worked.
My youngest is currently 6 months, so no where near ready for toilet training.
That's really great that you didn't give up on them and assume they couldn't eventually learn.
@noelletakesthesky3977 I live in modern day Texas, nothing is free.
@zarasbazaar it took a lot of work, a lot of side eye from strangers that I was in the diaper aisle for my 1st grader, and a lot of Mrs Meyers Lemon Verbena (does wonders to get the pee smell out of carpet btw) but we finally got it done. And it wasn't just me. It was also 3 teachers over 3 years, countless aids and an occupational therapist. It literally took an entire team working for years. My kids will be able to do anything, they're just going to need more time. My daughter is currently learning English (her native language) and Spanish (because she likes it) at the same time. I don't know another kid her age trying to go from non-verbal to bilingual. Lol.
That first bit and the South Park episode where the "shitty wall" needed to be built to protect the kids from strangers. Then, they needed to send the kids outside of the wall because the danger is from someone they know.
Well, yeah. Mongolians are pretty chill unless there's a wall involved.
*"God Damn Mongolians! You knock down my Shi-Ti Wall!!!"*
The M word
Mongorians
Shticky shweet and shower pawk!
The unexpected Skeletor laughing at Young Simon™ had me howling
The editing in this video was just SAVAGE. 😂😂😂
Look, to teach kids how to be safe, teach them that "Most people are safe, but THESE BEHAVIORS might be dangerous."
Fill in with behaviors like grabbing you, taking you to a second location, offering you candy or gifts (decline politely and ask your parents), inviting you into a car, etc.
It makes the strange situation scary, not random people.
When I was a kid only people with the family password could take me anywhere. Meaning I knew if someone tried to take me that I knew and didn't know the password know it wasn't cool to go home with. I have kids of my own now and it's definitely part of our safety discussion.
During lockdown, around this time (Easter) two ladies were driving around the neighborhood handing out mini Easter baskets to children.
My two step kids (7&9 at the time) ran inside the house yelling “stranger danger! Stranger danger!” And told me that someone in a van just tried to give them candy.
I looked out my office window and sure enough there was. When I went outside I talked to them and realized they were just two old ladies trying to do something nice for the neighborhood kids. I took the mini Easter baskets and gave them to the kids and told them to go ham since they technically did the right thing by not accepting the candy from a van person lol
@@agneslawson9276one problem tho the people most likely to molest or kidnap your child are family and family friends. Rarely is it ever a stranger
@@thatdamncrow9197Exactly. The best solution I can think of is to embrace wider definitions of family. Communities have become so atomised, in part precisely because of the stranger danger panic, so kids have two or three adults that they're supposed to trust and anyone else interacting with the kid is seen as suspect. That's a situation ripe for abuse. Giving children the education and the freedom to integrate as autonomous members of a large, multi-generational community will keep them safer from any individual bad actors, not to mention give them more practical experience of people.
@@hughcaldwell1034 well frankly the best solution is probably to make sure they understand exactly what is and isn’t appropriate and that they feel 100 safe and confident in going to their parents about inappropriate behavior no matter who it is that did it
I was taught about stranger danger 25 years ago. Kids need to be weary about people approaching them. If the kid is lost, they can basically ask anyone anywhere for help. Ideally a single older woman or a couple, but it could be anyone. The odds of a child randomly approaching a creep are very slim. If the adult initiates the encounter, that's a different story..
Love the fact we were told not to go in a strangers car and now we call Lyft and Uber and jump in a strangers car without a thought of it 😅
The scary part of that is that they aren't even a regular employee of a taxi business, just independent contractors.
So it would be pretty easy, at least in concept, for them to commit a serious crime and just lay low for a while.
After all, there wouldn't necessarily be anything super suspiciou about a Lyft/Uber driver taking a few weeks or even a year off from driving people around.
The increase in VLDL skits being used in these videos pleases my soul 😂 my favourite 2 content creators!
When one of your favorite channels uses or references another.
Yup. I live for those and the Doctor Who ones lol.
I have zero interest in, or understanding of, computer gaming but I love their sketches. They are consistently funny and usefully give me a chance of understanding what my kids are talking about once in a while.
Maybe the editor is a kiwi.
As my Grandpa always said, stupid is supposed to hurt.
nice
He was a wise man.
Sage advice!
so thats why it always hurts everyday
That's why it hurts to listen to Trump.
Omg the Brennen close up really got me as a reaction, I was not expecting him here.
“It’s this Dave!!” Proceeds to show a screen to the camera despite knowing Dave cannot see it 😂. Give the man a description
6:52 @VivaLaDirtLeague You have once again been found worthy of the Whistler-verse. Such an honor...🔥🔥🔥
Nice day for fishing ain’t it!
@@nick_steele9790he-yuh!
Ever since I saw the golden retriever/pest video, I have followed VLDL religiously. Glad to see them getting attention!
I googled the nappy/diaper question in 3 seconds. Dave was correct! Simon has already forgotten that you can search manually. All hail our Lord ChatGPT 😂😂😂
And ChatGpt is as likely to make crap up as tell you the facts,lol
@@rachelwitherspoon4394Just like talking to a real person! 😊
The figure comes from the WEF website.
Make of that what you will.
As someone who knows one of the writers. The writers do the research and everything so he relies on their research and lots of the videos are dry reads so he hasn't had time to double check anything so it's more unique reactions to the things in the content.
@@Lina_into_it Thank you for explaining. It was sarcasm. I've watched Simon's channels long enough to recognize him without a beard. Cheers
I laughed way harder at that "Nooooooo" Bee than I had any right to 😂
There were diaper services that would come to your home, pick up the parcel of used diapers and then bring them back cleaned.
Find a need and fill it; the entrepreneurial spirit. An entire industry was rendered obsolete by disposable nappies.
annnd due to environmentalists squealing? theyyyyy came back yet again! most net searches in the US will give you about 228 or so services with online data for search engines to find. so, the entire industry wasn't destroyed. :)
18:16 I'm old enough to have had the terrible duty of changing, cleaning and washing the diapers of my younger siblings. My preferred method of cleaning the pureed crap out of their diapers was to dip them in the toilet in order to get them clean enough to throw into the washer. The past- as some bright fellow likes to say- was the worst...
So, there have been a lot of advancements in washable diaper tech. Namely the use of those viva cloth-like paper towels put directly between the skin and the diaper and all that has to happen to get the poop out is to peel the paper towel off and throw it away. Easy peasy 💚
But, and also, that’s messed up that you were responsible for the diaper poop cleanup duty (heh)
I’d never give that task to anyone but myself.
@@CraftyVegan We used those liners. VERY easy.
@@noelletakesthesky3977I wouldn’t say “easy”. But easier than before washing machines. We couldn’t afford disposable diapers in 1982.
@@sandrastreifel6452 Same for my family... cloth diapers were the only affordable option for my brother and I. We never even touched one of those big boxes of disposables.
😂🤣 Been there done that! Glad there’s still some of us around. 👍🏻
That homemade intro is fire 😂
You have the best editor lmfao. Also! As someone who started then put a degree in education on hold: if anyone reading this wants their kids to be able to tell an adult something serious:
TELL YOUR CHILD THAT THEY CAN ALWAYS TRUST THEIR SCHOOL STAFF. ESPECIALLY counselors and ESPECIALLY teachers! It doesn't even need to be one of their own teachers. It can be a favorite teacher they used to have that doesn't teach their grade. Not only is your child almost certainly going to be under video surveillance at school, but at least here in the states, teachers and school staff are mandatory reporters. They're legally obligated to immediately alert the proper channels if a child in their care says something sus. Obviously this doesn't apply to when your kid is not at school... but they spend a good amount of time there.
I come for Simon. I stay for the cutaways 😂. Great writing, presenting, and editing as always 👌 this one was a riot lol.
The editor needs a raise after this video 😂😂😂😂.
Too many gems
Yeah, they were definitely in rare form while editing this video
Usually if the population of a prey animal explodes, it's because humans killed off the local predators. It never works to introduce non native predators. The best solution is to restore the populations that were originally there.
Not exactly true for example wolf/deer populations in a healthy ecosystem as deer populations increase wolves breed more successfully because they had plenty of food to feed themselves and their cubs so more survived and there are more wolves to hunt so they could take down more and bigger game eventually the wolves decrease the deer population by so much that comes winter there is just not enough pray to sustain the wolves and many of the wolves will starve
@michellejones5541 that's....because humans killed off most of the wolves that would have supported natural changes in the population. Once we started farming wolves were enemy number 1 lol
My country has never had a local predator.
Headphone user here. Sitting at my desk working on a college assignment and 26:30 had me running for the door.
That little bee saying Noooo was adorable! I was laughing through this whole video!!! More craziness like this please X)
Julian is a kick ass editor!
🤣
He used Viva la Dirt League as a meme 😅
Gave me a heart-attack with the knocking. It's 12am and that type of knocking cannot come from a concrete wall lol.
@@mejuliie Yeah, my heart still hasn't settled down. Holy crap.
Even more savage than Jen!
I’m with you guys. That knocking freaked me out. Wearing headphones, I thought someone was inside my wall.
Looks like Dave isn't getting his mushroom ration today
This editor has been on point lately
I would have sworn Simon was talking about a building called “the Shart.” I had to look it up.
19:41 now I’ve learned that Simon and his wife don’t know how to do laundry properly 😂😂😂
Right? “Baby loads” are a thing! (Tho I will admit “baby formula stink” tends to linger in a house for as long as it’s used there)
The amount of people who don't know there is supposed to be space in the machine sp the clothes get cleaned is unreal.
Last I knew, you were supposed to put soiled nappies to soak in a "NappySan" tub, which is kind of a pre-wash, germ killing thing.
But my knowledge may be out of date.
We had a "Diaper Genie." The thing was supposed to contain the stink. It didn't.
So true. I wanted to save money with our first kid, so $75 worth of disposable charcoal impregnated absorbent, washable pads were bought, along with several sets of different sized reusable diapers, but they all leaked and made a mess, I think we put up with maybe a month of this before switching to disposables.
That cut to "Noone cares" 🤣😂 chefs kiss
Every time Simon says “Shard” I hear “shart” and it’s bringing me joy. 😂
Screaming at the top of your lungs "you're not my mom you're not my dad" was exactly what I was taught to do. Also if lost find a person with a kid was also taught to me. I don't remember being taught "stranger danger" specifically. Also none of this advice even mattered when I got lost in a fucking forest on a mountain, thank gods I saw the flashlight in the distance and screamed for them. IIRC I also heard the helicopter which would have been cool if I wasn't terrified because the sun was setting.
And nowadays hikers are staying lost because they’re not answering their phones
My school teacher told us to not even get into a car with a family member if we weren’t planning to ride with them from the get-go. So one day, as I was walking to my grandma’s house, my grandma drove by and asked if I wanted a ride (it was raining, after all), and I almost didn’t get in. Fortunately, my logic in 3rd grade was solid enough to realize that it didn’t matter because I was going to her house anyway. So it wasn’t even my parents teaching me not to talk to strangers- it was my public school. In the 80s.
18:17 Love the editor getting one back for Dave.
I used cloth diapers for years, with the plastic pants. Thankfully, my hubby realized that u don't need to scrub the tiny poops out first, when the babies r little. If you just run the diapers through 2 cycles, n make sure the machine is not overloaded, they will come out perfectly clean. If they're breastfeeding, their little yellow poops won't stink much until they start eating food. Then they become more like normal poop, but by that time, they don't poop as often. You can even buy liners to put in cloth diapers- so when they poo, you just strip out the liner n throw it away in a bag. Use bleach to deal with any smell or stains. Also, if anything you wash ever smells weird again, try washing it twice n see if it isn't better. Occasionally, I run across something that won't stop smelling bad. I'll take it outside, spray febreze on it, n let it sit for a while. Then wash again, n the smell should be gone! Also, for people who like line drying, the sun took out any remaining baby poop stains from the diapers. It was quite amazing to watch them disappear!
You cant use bleach in a septic system.
thowing straight shit in ya washing machine 😅 just wash it though twice she’ll be right 🤮🤢
Does running a load with vinegar hell with the smell at all?
I cloth diaper too. I liked line drying til I found a spider.
Also did cloth diapers. We used disposable for infancy and vacations, but cloth for most of kiddo’s time in diapers.
I taught my kids about common ruses. Never follow someone who offers you candy or gifts. It's not normal for adults to ask for help from children, so if an adult asks you to help them with something that will make you follow them or go into their home or vehicle, they are being bad or at least very inappropriate, and you should tell them that they need to ask an adult, not you. If someone you don't know tells you that they need to pick you up because your parent is injured or in the hospital, don't go with them, go back inside the school and get help from the office to find out if what they said is true. They should at least know the names of your mom and grandma and some sort of personal family information as a passcode. And if any adult ever tells you to keep a secret from one of your parents, that is proof that something is wrong and that parent needs to know. Adults know that is is wrong to tell kids to keep secrets from their parents.
I think especially the parts about asking kids for help and asking kids to keep secrets being deviant behavior stuck with my kids, and they always avoided and report anything odd. Teaching kids that "being treated like an adult" isn't a compliment to them but rather a suspicious behavior from the adult no matter how mature and well-behaved you are seemed to help them recognize suspicious adults versus seemingly kind and innocuous ones.
I'm glad to see more VLDL clips being used.
Ah, yes, very low density lipoprotein clips. I enjoy them as well.
TangentBoi: Me and my friend had babies at the same time
Julian: Nobody cares
🤣🤣👌
Hahaha I'm Julian
@@juliancrenshaw1924You’re A Julian.
One sentence in and we're off to tangent land!
wouldn't expect anything less, if no tangents am not watching....
As an autistic Portsmouth resident with a special interest in the Spinnaker Tower, its flawed construction is incredibly fascinating to me. There is a website that details its construction through newspaper clippings that I have regularly visited since I was ten.
As someone who adores the building, I’ll forgive Dave’s disinterest in it. The infamous glass elevator was removed in 2012 due to it never being fixed properly.
Despite it being called a “monstrosity” in this video, I'll argue that it is a beautiful structure that may interest anyone fascinated by modern architecture. There is also quite a lot to do there, like walking on the glass floor or abseiling. I'd recommend checking it out.
8:50 - So, my niece (she was 10) was mad at her dad, because he wouldn't buy some toy for her. so, on the way out of the store, she yelled "Help! You're not my dad!". Some other guy tackled him and started hitting him (gladly not too badly) and the police were called. Four hours later, everything got figured out, and he was allowed to go home with his daughter. Needless to say, vast quantities of punishments ensued. As I recall, he asked one of the police officers to supervise the spanking he was about to give her (while still in the store), which the police officer gladly did.
Kids are cruel
"And i love minors, Jack!"
How to prevent harm from coming to your kids: dont have any.
Lol! So true
That's how I'm doing it, cuz my family is insanely abusive and damaging. I'm in my 30s and it is still a lot. Never bringing a kid into that. I got my tubes tied lol. I also have medical problems, so I don't have the energy or ability to support them anyway
I don't know I always thought about adopting a kid... That way I could abandon them at a mall.
😂 🤣🤣
@@baronblair5811Dude, that's cruel... You should abandon them at an arcade, with a handful of quarters. You'll be long gone before they find out.
The intentional introduction of non-native species hurts my soul 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️ It's happened so many times and ruined so many ecosystems
Hahahaha as a New Zealander, we are still dealing with this two centuries on!!!
Iirc there were like two times that it went for the better but those were because the species filled a niche that had been recently wiped out either by another invasive species or by us.
@@tOGGLEwAFFLES I would love if you shared these two examples! 😀
And the worst non-native species are humans
I agree. All humans back to Africa!
Simon is slowly preparing his beard for his plan to enter the time machine and become a 19th century philosopher.
Oh heck, disposable diapers. Yeah, those prices are insane, even before Covid it was something like $30 a box here in Canada.
I actually worked retail for a good while. If we found someone stealing diapers, we'd get their attention and gauge their reaction. If they looked up with annoyance, like a thief, you bet your ass we made sure they left in a squad car. If they looked up with shock and shame? We pointed out the better brand then the one at the back of the section and left them be. We weren't about to pinch someone who was driven to stealing essentials for their baby out of desperation, to heck with that.
I actually scored more than one date doing this, what is my life?
26:29 Damnit, I went to check the front door because of this knock!
I was sitting next to a window which was not at ground floor!
@@ryqd They fooled us well!
“Never get into a car with strangers.”
“Never give a stranger your home address or let them know when you won’t be home.”
•
“Just get an Uber to take you to the airport for your vacation!”
*(And, YES! “HELP! HELP! THIS IS NOT MY PARENT!” is a great thing to teach your kids!!!)*
[And then… Simon shows Dave, his blind writer, a photo on a video, of what the other building looks like…]
_Julian brought the editing sass something fierce, and I’m here for it!_
We love it here🤣
Your not my mom/dad is good but if you're a step parent it's not.
It's heard all the time "you're not my dad or my real dad".
@@dismothafuka405 That’s why I go with “not my parent”.
8:54 lol, when my blonde haired, blue eyed friend (who takes after her Polish father) was very little, she was told to yell, “you’re not my mom/dad.” One time, after her Italian mom (dark hair, brown eyes) told her, “no” to buying a new toy, my friend yelled, “you’re not my mother!” And caused a huge scene at the store. Her mom had to prove she was her mother to store clerks and authorities. Finally, the husband/dad arrived with the family photo album to settle everything (this was the 90s).
Not me over here laughing because my mother raised both my little brother and I in the washable cotton diapers. Nobody in my family ever even saw one of those boxes of disposables. I come from old farmer stock - we've seen worse. 😆
The writers should conspire next year and do an April Fool's episode with a list of facts that gets things Simon's covered in the last month subtly wrong
You don’t put washable diapers in the washing machine crap and all. My mom rinsed the soiled diapers in the toilet to remove the solid waste, then the diapers went into a bleach solution in a diaper bin until there were enough for a wash load.
Or get a service to pick up the dirty nappies and deliver the clean ones .
Exactly. A bucket of water with vinegar did it for us. Basically all finnish bathrooms have a handshower near the toilet, with that it's pretty easy to wash the ... content ... to the toilet. Also, because it's a lot of work, my wife did her best to get them potty-trained as early as possible.
The Knocking at 26:30 scared the pants off me!! I'm home by myself with headphones on walking around, and I physically jumped when that sound effect turned on.
Another unintended consequence is that strangers are afraid to help a child for fear of being labeled a creeper.
Having kids go to people in uniform generally works.
I didn't tell my kids that, but they were separated from me in public one time and I tried to find them before reporting them to security. After a while, they called me to say they had them. They had walked up to one of the employees and asked for help.
I don't even know if someone had taught them that or they figured it out for themselves.
Good skill either way.
Julian, you killed it on this one. Hi- larious.
23:28 I think some people don't potty train their kids sooner because of the excuse, "I don't have the time."
Then the school says, "Make the time or we're not taking your kid."
When I had my kids in the early 80s the average age to start potty training was 8 to 10 months. Disposable nappies were still really expensive so most people used Terry toweling nappies that consisted of a nappy liner to catch any poops (which was thrown away) the Terry toweling nappy it's self and waterproof knickers over the top. It was a lot of work to keep up with washing the nappies so the sooner you potty trained the better. These days it's not unusual to see children of 4 or 5 still in nappies because that is easier than potty training for lazy parents
Oh good so kids with parents who're not coping or inattentive are denied education and social interaction with other kids at school too? I'm sure that'll work out great.
And don't forget disabled kids too. Don't they deserve schooling?
The supercut intro was goddamn hilarious. Editor out here carrying the team.
One terrifying story I heard was a time in the US where a baby was almost kidnapped by a woman in a parking lot by just grabbing the carrier and running then screaming when the dad tried to stop her. A crowd of people then beat the man and tried to keep them separated until the police could get there, when the mother came out of the store and rightfully freaked out about the mob beating her husband and letting a stranger hold her son the woman basically just dropped the kid and ran. The dad was arrested and questioned anyway and I'm not even sure anyone even bothered looking for the attempted kidnapper.
I recall reading about a case like that when my daughter was a baby. Worried the hell out of me and my husband. The idea of a father being involved with his own child was so odd to a lot of people. As I recall though, the woman who grabbed the baby was apprehended.
They expect fathers to defend their children, and then lose their minds when they do.
I'm glad I'm not having kids
300,000 disposable nappies (diapers) per minute worldwide does indeed seem to be the number.
There was a story from my hometown involving a Boy Scout (I think he was 12) who got separated from the troop while on a day hike in a large national park. Of course a huge search party went out.
He wasn’t found for several hours. Other than dehydration and being spooked, he was okay. When he was found, he revealed that he had heard the search parties looking for him and calling his name but he remembered Stranger Danger and retreated deeper into the woods.
This raised a discussion in our town about the unintended side effects of Stranger Danger. One of my friends pointed out that children (and parents) have more to worry about people they do know because it’s those people who are (more likely than not) responsible for children being kidnapped or abused or killed.
Simon has the best job ever. There's a bald bearded British man who just likes to talk to me.
How can you prove your kid is yours on the side of the road? Hmm.... seriously, I don't think I ever have any type of paperwork proving kids ownership.
You havn't registered your child?
Are they even chipped?
My two youngest daughters look like my wife. Like Mini-me's. They could have shouted "you're not my dad" in public and people would probably have believed them!
Loads of pictures on your phone from over a long period of time would help.
The best way is to hand over your ID and have the other person ask your child for their full name, assuming you share the same last name. Most kids that young won't realize they should lie about their name, or at least they'll stumble a bit trying to make one up.
My thoughts exactly
You’re team and you are doing amazing work keep it up!
Moar Viva la Dirt League memes ftw!!! Incoming meme, Skeletor memes, Simon nuclear explosion meme, Shia LaBeouf meme... seriously all the finest memes checked off on this episode. Plus that black kittens shouting meme I've never seen and some Dave/Danny hijinks, this episode has it all!
My nephew once found an Easter egg that was at least two years old, but may have been older.
I told him to put it in the outside trashcan and do not break it no matter what happens.
I was not at all surprised when he came back and said, "I wish I had listened to you."
Sometimes a kid just has to learn the hard way. That nephew is now 34, but he still listens to me.
Dave is blind, he cant see the difference between the shard and the walkie talkie
I never heard of 20 Fenchurch Street, but “the Walkie-talkie” that shoots heat rays, SURE!
(explains that Dave is completely blind)
less than two minutes later:
(tries to show Dave that he is wrong by SHOWING HIM A PHOTO)
@@flodnakand not having it on screen for Dave to be able to use a screen reader
When my ex wife and I had our twin daughters we briefly tried the cloth nappies as well, they had certainly come a long way since my mother used them for me and my much younger siblings.
As for potty training, my youngest daughter (I have 3) just decided one day that she didn't want to wear a nappy anymore and that she would just use the toilet. I can't remember her age but she was definitely significantly younger than 2 as she was 2 when her mother walked out of our lives.
Whoever edits these videos is absolutely hilarious 😂😂
The knocking sound was too good and made me jump out of my seat thinking someone was actually knocking on my door 😅 26:32
26:25 I answered that knock ... f*ck you Julian, you brilliant bastard.
I have headphones on and jumped out of my skin.
That incoming meme never gets old
16:27 Thanks Julian, appreciate it!
The cobbled together intro is a masterpiece. Soon you won't even need to involve Simon in making videos of him reading your scripts 😂
That intro was legendary
The ozone story is even more horrifying and impressive when you realize that the reason the world worked so quickly together to ban CFCs was because Earth was less than 10 years away from having a hole big enough in the ozone layer that the human race would have been irradiated by the sun and ultimately wiped out most of the species. It is grossly undertold as one of the moments in history where we came terrifyingly close to total destruction.
Great…I’m still trying to cope with sushi becoming too toxic to eat. It may be the way I chose to die. Better than space radiation, I guess….oh…wait…cancer🤦🏾♀️
@@erikaarnold4780 It's pretty crazy how most developed country's have their national health boards having to tell people to limit the amount of fish they consume... not because fish is unhealthy (it's the opposite, it's super healthy)... but to limit the amount of mercury they ingest which is in just about all fish we consume thanks to countless dumping of mercury into our rivers, oceans and seas. We are such a miserably stupid species, regardless of our technological feats.
2:35 - Mid roll ads
4:05 - Chapter 1 - Stranger danger
9:35 - Chapter 2 - Macquarie island
14:05 - Chapter 3 - 20 fenchurch street london
18:15 - Chapter 4 - Disposable nappies
24:55 - Chapter 5 - CFCs
PS : 23:45 - The tangent master has been broken folks !
For the "stranger danger"/ family "friend" conundrum: give each child their very own secret word that only the child, you & the other parent know. If a stranger or "family friend" says mom or dad sent them to pick them up, the child is to ask for the secret word. If they don't know it; then, the child is not to go with them, no matter what the person says IE mommy or daddy's been in a terrible accident and I'm going to take you to them.
I successfully used this with my 3 children. They weren't afraid of people they didn't know. Communication is key. ❤
I LOVE passwords.
Love seeing Viva La Dirt League
Epic NPC Man for the win
7:50 omg the little simon killed me 😂
The editing on this was chefs kiss.
One of my How did we survive times was when my brother and I heard that you could make cool shapes by melting lead and squirting water on it. We swiped a bunch of lead pellets and melted them in the tin they came in. Then we leaned in and spit in the melted lead. We got a cool shape but it was because the lead cooled explosively and sprayed us with lead pieces. We got burned every time we did it which was any time we could snitch some pellets. When my wife was in med school one of the studies they reviewed made the claim that teens and young adults act so stupid because boys don’t grasp the concept of consequences until they are in their mid twenties while girls catch on in their early twenties. This is why the military likes to get eighteen year olds because they don’t really grasp cause and effect yet.
And yet I, as a girl, was the one blowing up microwaves experimenting by throwing various crap in there, and inventing games with my sibs involving hucking crao at each other. Oh, and the classic stacking gunpowder caps on each other and smacking them with a hammer...pennies on railroad tracks...it's remarkable I'm alive with some of the dumb crap we pulled.
@@Tardisntimbits There is more than one reason we can say it’s a wonder we survived the 60’s to enjoy the 70’s.
I’m surprised you don’t have lead poisoning-induced brain damage 💀
yeah, i think i read that study your wife referenced... and more modern ones too... the modern ones even the 'sexual playing field' for idiotic behavior as the pre-frontal-cortex in both males and females is the last part to reach full maturity levels starting in the 20's.