You! Be GRATEFUL, HONORED that Narcissist Lets You Serve, Witness Him: Sacrificial Entitlement

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  • Опубліковано 8 гру 2023
  • Sacrificial entitlement is a form of self-supply, combines grandiosity and victimhood, exactly like morality, charity.
    Privilege to be privy, witness to his life, adventures, and accomplishments.
    A transformative experience for better (narcissist’s POV) or for worse (your POV).
    Your abandonment of him constitutes ingratitude, part of your inexorable devaluation.
    Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store:
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 61

  • @elisa9359
    @elisa9359 6 місяців тому +81

    "They give in order to recieve".....YES...and only few people see behind this scene...they think he is such a helpful and giving person.....

    • @B-Nia
      @B-Nia 6 місяців тому +10

      👍👍

    • @agiejones7651
      @agiejones7651 6 місяців тому +5

      That's the most painful truth

    • @shawn2350
      @shawn2350 6 місяців тому +6

      I couldn't have said it any better. One more thing, my wife's father gives and will not let you give back. It was so hard to understand, WTF. Now, I don't offer anything. It's such a mind game.

  • @denisj6089
    @denisj6089 6 місяців тому +12

    Every single time I spend time with my father, I have go to through this, every single time we meet up, he has to remind me how hard he has worked for me, how much he sacrificed to feed/cloth/shelter me, how because of me, he had to endure hardships, all while I'm sitting there like "um, so, you want me to feel bad for you wanting to have a child?"

    • @RumiRose12
      @RumiRose12 6 місяців тому +3

      Yes it’s his responsibility to take care of you and that is not the way true gratitude is taught! It shouldn’t be taught as punishment or with shaming

  • @brainchildabacustt
    @brainchildabacustt 6 місяців тому +82

    I had to laugh, can't do anything else at this point. These videos are sooo accurate. Last night my husband said he's forcing himself to be around me 😂 God help me heal.

    • @FAVanguard
      @FAVanguard 6 місяців тому +9

      Maybe he is. Maybe you are insufferable. Have you ever considered that Maybe it's you?
      Inability to do introspection often accompanies implying everyone else is a narcissist.

    • @MPR2007
      @MPR2007 6 місяців тому +2

      @@FAVanguard Look whos talking here 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @FAVanguard
      @FAVanguard 6 місяців тому +1

      The narcissist who want everyone to cater to their needs are complaining 🤣

    • @brainchildabacustt
      @brainchildabacustt 6 місяців тому +7

      @@FAVanguard yes it's definitely me, sitting here trying to figure out how I was verbally, physically and financially abused and can't get off of this hamster wheel of a relationship. I must be so insufferable to offer my home to a basically homeless man to so torment and terrorize us that my kids now need therapy too. Must be me and the CPSTD I now try to unravel. I never even thought of that. Thank you for your sage wisdom 🙏 🙄🤡

    • @oWMatt
      @oWMatt 6 місяців тому +2

      ​​@@brainchildabacusttI'm sorry that happened to you...why would you anable the abuse? Get away from that person as soon as possible.

  • @lanahyde7588
    @lanahyde7588 6 місяців тому +27

    I love Sam Vaknin, he’s the best specialist in NPD.

  • @FAVanguard
    @FAVanguard 6 місяців тому +44

    Most narcissistic individuals dont think they are narcissist and tend to diagnose those with strong boundaries and resistance to their manipulation as narcissist.

  • @TruckerBLW
    @TruckerBLW 6 місяців тому +6

    Yep. At the last of the discards, my lack of gratitude was made very, very clear to me…

  • @crystalspeirs6186
    @crystalspeirs6186 6 місяців тому +5

    I am laughing because I have so much experience with this! OMG incredibly sad that I beat myself up and actually questioned my ungratefulness

    • @soniafaye9919
      @soniafaye9919 4 місяці тому

      May I kindly suggest Crappy Childhood Fairy on UA-cam

  • @LiveAGoodLife-Athena
    @LiveAGoodLife-Athena 6 місяців тому +40

    Love you Sam. You’re adorable and you’ve helped so many people!

    • @LiveAGoodLife-Athena
      @LiveAGoodLife-Athena 6 місяців тому +7

      @@saritalil9116you’re so right, it really is a privilege. All this priceless insight, delivered with such a high level of articulation, available to anyone.

  • @annamarsch6091
    @annamarsch6091 6 місяців тому +19

    He even said it, in those very words and more than once ..... `for you i sacrificed .... xyz` ....
    (of course i never asked him for any of that sacrifice).
    `You don´t appreciate me (others do) `and `be grateful for the gifts and lessons`.
    I am not making this stuff up, how could i? It all came from his side after i left him.
    And even though i have known for a while i have been confronted with a person expressing cluster b traits,
    its shocking. Shocking how close it comes to Sams descriptions...down to the very wording.

  • @14jemima
    @14jemima 6 місяців тому +8

    11:39 My mother used to say that. She also said "you're slowly killing me".

  • @lalitalal1849
    @lalitalal1849 6 місяців тому +6

    Thank you Professor, for education you are giving to save lifes

  • @rupakrisal990
    @rupakrisal990 6 місяців тому +4

    7:57 This is what my parents wanted me to think about myself when I was growing up.

  • @suzystone244
    @suzystone244 6 місяців тому +9

    A visual just came to mind...
    A sith lord.
    Narcissist Vader.
    Sorry, but this " gedi " ( me ) got out safe and sound.

  • @forgoroe
    @forgoroe 6 місяців тому +11

    "Sacrificial entitlement" captures it very well and gets at the core of every narcissist's plight: I couldn't give to myself (true self), even if i wanted to.
    Thank you, Sam!

  • @ivadedeva7005
    @ivadedeva7005 6 місяців тому +3

    My mother said to me exactly that what you are describing. She add that I am ungrateful and from now on I have to take care for her and my father. In addition my father is extremely successful in the society and he has aways been so this description is extremely accurate!
    In two words- now you own me!

  • @ryanjohnston3229
    @ryanjohnston3229 6 місяців тому +6

    I got it wrong once so I will watch.

  • @MPR2007
    @MPR2007 6 місяців тому +8

    Many Thanks and Pray to you Sam, You have helped me a lot through my darkest day.👈
    I have my own documented confession , conversation and journey with my narcissist wife, i just analyse all of it and come to conclusion as you described. Again thank you😊

  • @foukaable
    @foukaable 6 місяців тому +13

    Hi Sam! Happy Hannukah!

  • @amycoffman9092
    @amycoffman9092 6 місяців тому +4

    Ok so this video first perfect for something my narc said to me this morning. For context, the past week my narc has been working out of town which he does every winter (he's a tree trimmer) and i told him from the beginning that I don't want a relationship where my bf is gone every winter specially since he's manipulated situations to make me dependent on him fully so when he's gone I have to suffer cuz he sends me the least amount of money as possible. Its never enough for the basics. Yet he eats like a king when he's gone and comes home with new toys and stuff. He will bring me back stuff too but nothing comparable to what he buys himself. I've been working on leaving him for a long time. I dont have transportation and live in a very rural area. He's isolated me from friends. My family lives across the country. So I'm kinda stuck. Well while he was out of state this time he's been exceptionally nice to me. Has sent a lil bit more money than usual. Just a real lil bit. Telling he misses me and this and that. Laying it on thick. Well he ended up getting his motel room robbed. The guy he was rooming with left the door unlocked while he went and got bfast and my bf was sleeping and someone snuck in and stole anything worth value and some cash. He's just been down about it. Now my narc has stolen from anyone and everyone he knows. This morning he was taking about it and said he doesn't know why it happened to him. He said he understands karma but still doesn't understand why him right now. Said he's been thinking alot about "this is how other ppl feel" referring to him from stealing from other ppl. Mind you that past part I believe is 100% bullshit. He mentioned that he's not like other ppl. I said what are you then. He said a machine. He's let himself be vulnerable or have feelings like that. Being with him is suppose to be like an adventure every day. I've never heard him talk like that. Maybe during a fight he'll says things like he's my God. He tries to hide that he thinks he's better and does it well. He accuses me of thinking I'm better. Which is so off base cuz I just don't care enough about other ppl to consider if I'm better. I just worry about me. I told him that he bleeds like everyone else he's human too. Well it took him a couple hours and he's over it and back to the guy I despise and treating me like the enemy again. His normal.

  • @fassihabib2623
    @fassihabib2623 6 місяців тому +2

    Best intro ever 😂😂🤣🤣

  • @sharonreid8947
    @sharonreid8947 6 місяців тому +5

    Best. Video. Ever.

  • @nfbconnect
    @nfbconnect 6 місяців тому +28

    It gets really interesting when this expression of narcissism gets mixed up with the other mental disorders the narcissist might have, particualy personality dsorders. It is so present in polictians and how they speak to their constituents haha. Also celebrities, the 1%. They really think we should be grateful for them 😂

    • @jabril520001
      @jabril520001 6 місяців тому

      Many Americans still live in the gaze of the master manipulater narricist politician. The electorate idealizes the politicians. Except his or her God like delusions. The poltician is a God like figure to the electorate, however the politician is entitled narricist grandiose psychopath

  • @co5mo
    @co5mo 6 місяців тому +12

    oh so you actually met my girlfriend what are the chances 😅

  • @ruckusmagazine6612
    @ruckusmagazine6612 6 місяців тому +7

    5:15 so accurate how you describe it.

  • @chezdreadful6412
    @chezdreadful6412 6 місяців тому +1

    Happy Christmas 😂

  • @Naberius.666
    @Naberius.666 6 місяців тому +1

    Your psychoanalytic approach on NPD is by far the best. I can't stand all the other "NPD experts" since I've discovered your channel. Especially Dr. Ramani annoys me as hell with her superficiality.

  • @jonathankelly2655
    @jonathankelly2655 6 місяців тому +5

    Sounds fair to me. 😂

  • @EricaAndra
    @EricaAndra 6 місяців тому +5

    Sam - Thank you immensely for your content and work! When you refer to "The Narcissist", does that include those with "Narcissistic Style", the 15% of the population? Should intimate partners "Walk Away" from them too, or can they improve?

    • @samvaknin
      @samvaknin  6 місяців тому +6

      I am referring only to people clinically diagnosed with NPD.

    • @EricaAndra
      @EricaAndra 6 місяців тому +2

      Thank you! @@samvaknin

  • @MonikaLorenzova
    @MonikaLorenzova 5 місяців тому +2

    Narcissist is the one with the red hat and white body of course. Because he is good and he needs attention. The other is unvisible and bad. It is his partner. 🌕+ 🌑

  • @hananzeriqi6347
    @hananzeriqi6347 6 місяців тому +2

    😂 Oh , the title.

  • @byaweenja
    @byaweenja 6 місяців тому +3

    Is it likely that a narcissist would reidealize a partner who attempted to throw him in jail? If a narcissist takes a vindictive path against this partner, is he aware that he must enter the 'shared fantasy', or can he be vindictive towards a former partner without entering it?

    • @samvaknin
      @samvaknin  6 місяців тому +5

      Yes and no (revenge does not require a shared fantasy - just a fantasy).

  • @leroygordon9989
    @leroygordon9989 6 місяців тому +6

    Scan my brain please Sam! I want to be your protégé. It would be a privilege to have me as your protégé. But I would do it for you!

  • @Jason64976
    @Jason64976 6 місяців тому +14

    can you do a video on discard with respect to the finality of it, meaning if there is ever a final discard or always the intention to be reactivated?

    • @samvaknin
      @samvaknin  6 місяців тому +11

      Watch the shared fantasy playlist.

    • @Jason64976
      @Jason64976 6 місяців тому +3

      thank you, really appreciate the answer, had 4 discards already and currently in the 5th, longing for her to come back to me :/

    • @yeeeha5674
      @yeeeha5674 6 місяців тому +1

      Damn you're getting played hard stranger. Cut your ties and move on - you're only going to get punished more.@@Jason64976

    • @joe0633
      @joe0633 6 місяців тому

      @@Jason64976 Don't.

    • @ds37215
      @ds37215 4 місяці тому

      @@Jason64976 Why? Why do you want to be repeatedly discarded?